S12 W1: Striders of Rohan vs Crack Danks

 The Striders of Rohan are: Gandalf w/ White Lantern Ring (4 deaths), Winter Soldier w/ Green Lantern Ring, Blue Lantern #1a, Blue Lantern #2a

Crack Danks are: Jolee Fishdo, Grey Worm, Snow White and the 7 dwarfs, Sardakaur Terror Trooper #3 (4 deaths), Goldmember

The Striders are waiting at the bottom of the pit when the Danks rush from the side and slide in. Goldmember starts to tumble ass over ears and ends up breaking both his legs just like Chris Pratt did. He laid to the side for the duration of the match bleeding out as one of his femers tore his femoral artery. 

Grey worm had taken the time prematch to train and rally the 7 dwarves into a mini army of the unsullied. Snow white lifted her dress up to distract the Blue lanterns and in their moment of weakness, this allowed Sneezy and Grumpy to attack. Sneezy jumped on the face of Blue Lantern #1a and sneezed repeatedly into his mouth and face. Everyone was appalled since sneezing in public in 2021 is basically on par with chemical warfare. Anyway, BL1a got insta-Covid and died. Grumpy went into rage mode and took all his anger out on BL2a’s face. 

Winter Soldier was able to destroy all the Dwarves though along with the Disney princess. Grey worm threw a spear and Jolee pulled out some sick lightsaber moves and the two of them were able to overpower the Winter soldier while Gandalf easily took out the Sardakaur Terror Trooper #3 with a quick blast from his staff.

The greatest wizard of all time stared at the unfrightened duo that remained and calmly chuckled. As he twirled his staff he said to the two, “You didn’t actually think I would go to the graveyard in week one to YOU TWO, did you?”

The two realize their fate as Gandalf grabs the staff with both hands and buries it into the earth. The resulting shockwave annihilates the remaining Danks.