Monday, May 12, 2008

Geroge Washington's Slaves Vs. Better Than All of You

Geroge Washington's Slaves are Yoda w/ Kybuck, Shaak Ti, Ki Adi Mundi, Optimus Prime w/ Roller, Cosmos, Wild Man #1, Sandworm #15 & 16, Ancient Ginaz Swordsmen #17-19, Thor, Arisia, Martian Manhunter, Al Dizzle, Jimmy Nuetron, & Cthulu.



Better Than All of You is Aquaman & Aqualad, Thanos, Green Lantern, Mephisto, Agent Smith, The Terminator (from T-1), The Terminator (from T-2), Doc Holliday, Ghost Rider, Lex Luthor, Cobra Commander, Skeletor, Predator #1, Army Soldier #1, & Rob Van Damm & Sabu.

The Slaves are gathered near the outskirts of the desert near the city before the battle when Ki Adi Mundi says "I am not sure our best course of action is not to stand backand simply let our 3 huge creatures fight against this team". Referring of course to their 2 sandworms and Cthulu. "We were sent here for a reason Master Jedi" says Martian Manhunter with Arisia nodding behind him in agreeance. The always wise and humble Optimus Prime then chimes in with "there is more to being powerful than sheer size, you know. It was your teacher Yoda who showed me that". Which causes Thor to say "aye" and Yoda to "Hmmm" and then Wild Man #1 says "arrgh" (but not really in response to the others, he was going to say that anyway). At that exact moment as if the creatures had ears that could understand basic the 2 sandworms come crashing out of the sand with the tops of their heads going hundreds of meters into the air and come crashing down onto George Washington's favorite slave making Al Dogg "the man so nice they buried him thrice". Cobra Commander has once agian decided that he leads his team best from the field which is why he is there in person for their first ever play-off match. Cobra Commander's team is set up on the grassland so they are seperated from the majority of their enemies by the water, which Aquaman & Aqualad have already jumped into to set up camp in what is by far their best environment. Cobra Commander and the boys (I say boys because as you may or may not have noticed throughout the course of the season Better Than All of You has a total of zero women on its roster) believe that they are still very far away from the entire George Washington squad when the undescribably huge, ancient Cthulu suddenely appears out of nowhere. The huge monster dwarfs the small sea as he walks displacing water onto the surrounding areas. He then grabs Rob Van Damm and crushes him in his mighty claw. Cthulu is about to go onto the land when he is all of the sudden distracted by Aquaman who is swimming around in the water below him at unbelievable speeds. Cthulu tries to attack Aquaman but the great monster cannot keep up with Aquaman. Aqualad, despite the fact that Aquaman ordered him to hang back while he distracts Cthult races in, in typical sidekick fashion to try and help his boss. Cthulu raises his mighty foot into the air and brings it down through the water on top of Aqualad, bringing him straight down to the water's floor and kills him. The furious Aquaman then tries to do what even he in his eternal arrogance was not sure he could do. He concentrates all of his mental power and takes control of the mighty sea-dwelling Cthulu. He then, once in the ancient one's brain causes him to leap out of the sea and go crashing into the deep desert sand about 3000 yards away. The 2 sandworms become extremelyalarmed by this sudden invasion as they, in an act of pure instinct come crashing down on top of the mighty Cthulu to kill him. As they do this the soaking wet, water-based, much larger creature is full of so much moisture that the 2 sandworms are consumed with the water which to them is pure poison and fatal. After witnessing this amazing display of death and largeness the 2 teams both decide that they should both rush in & let this battle officially begin. Most of the Slaves climb into Cosmos and he flies over the water into the grassy area where Better Than All of You are residing. The 3 anicent Ginaz Swordsmen cannot wait to get out of the evil machine that is Cosmos and instantly go running toward the 2 terminators. They have an immediate hatred for these 2 thinking machines as they are much like the machines of the Evermind Omnius that they have trained there entire lives to fight against and would gladly give their lives to destroy. T-2 grabs Swordsmen #18 by the throat and crushes his larnyx but Swordsmen #17 & 19 use their vibroblades to cut the terminator apart. They then move to attack T-1, but only Swordsmen #17 survives the attack. He jumps off of the ruined thinking machine ready for battle but does not see Predator #1 (because he is invisible) bludgeon him to death with the blunt instrument he has carried into the battle with him. Army Soldier #1 busts a cap into the dome of Wild Man #1 as he is of course "wildly" running out of Cosmos. Thor comes flying out of Cosmos and instantly goes after his old enemy Mephisto. Mephisto showers Thor with a barrage of Hellish fire but the son of Odin fights through the onslaught. Thor throws the mystical hammer mjonir through the firestorm and hits Mephisto in the chest. It goes right through the chest of Mephisto and kills him but but Thor's powers do not work quick enough because before his best source of both attack and defense Mjonir can come back to the Norse god, Thanos levels him with an amazing display of cosmic power that not even the son of Odin can withstand. Cosmos returns to the air but Green Lantern catches up to the Autobot flying saucer easily. Hal Jordan is about to entertain a thought about how easy it is going to be for him to destroy the evading ship when Cosmos' hatch opens up and out fly Arisia, Martian Manhunter, and Jimmy Nuetron in a tiny version of Cosmos piloted by the boy genius himself. Lex Luthor takes to the air to help out Green Lantern once he sees him outnumbered 4 to 1. Jimmy Nuetron helps prove Al Dawg's point that smart kids die young as Lex Luthor targets and destroys Nuetron with a powerful lazer blast. Despite being outnumbered Green Lantern still goes on the offensive against his airborn attackers. Martian Manhunter knows much about the powers of green lanterns after his years of working with the Justice League which is why he uses his shape-shifting abilities to make himself yellow. Arisia, in a moment of youthfull inexpierence flies up next to her old boyfriend Green Lantern and says "Hal, can't we work this out for old times sake"? but Hal Jordan, the champion of the Green Lantern Corps in true badass form says "sorry, but no" as he blasts her apart with his ring. But even the Cobra Commanded Hal Jordan takes a second to ponder the evil that he has been forced to commit do to this damned Fantasy Fantasy League that he has been cursed with which is when the now yellow Martian Manhunter flies up behind Green Lantern and rips off his green energy protected head. Yoda from on top of Kybuck leads the 2 other Jedi Masters on a lightsaber charge but they are stopped in their tracks when Agent Smith jumps in front of their path. Smith begins a rant about how he hates The Fantasy Fantasy League even more than he hated the Matrix and that he will stop at nothing to destroy do-gooders like the Jedi. He says that "Jedi encompass everything there is to hate about humanity" and that he can't wait until they are extinct. Yoda looks backat his former padawan Ki Adi Mundi and says "continue the charge you must, handle him alone I will". Yoda then gets off of Kybuck and directs the 2 legged beast of burden to follow Masters Mundi and Ti on their attack. Agent Smith jumps into the air and flips but Yoda force pushes him back to where he started and then pulls out his lightsaber. The 2 of them flip around each other repeatedely at amazing speeds. Agent Smith lands a kick to the stomach of Yoda which not only knocks Yoda into a rock but also knocks his lightsaber from his hand. Yoda rolls onto the ground and is obviousely in pain as Agent Smith begins slowly walking towards him laughing. "Is there anything more powerful than me" says Smith as he strolls toward the battered Jedi Master, he then pulls out his desert eagle and takes aim at Yoda saying "do you still think a lazer sword is better than a gun"? Yoda replies with "say that I do not, but the force is", as he uses the force to simultaneousely turn on and levitate his lightsaber, and then send it flying into the back of Agent Smith's head, killing him. Ghost Rider drives his firey motorcycle right across the water and through the desert to get to the city where Cosmos left behind Optimus Prime who, under orders from Coach Washington himself was instructed to stay in the city where he is most useful. Optimus transforms and rolls out into the city but Ghost Rider follows behind him on his bike. Optimus releases Roller and the tough little Autobot gets right in front of Ghost Rider. Ghost Rider drives right over him but in the process of destroying the non-transforming little Transformer he is thrown from his motorcycle. While Ghost Rider is in mid-air Optimus Prime jumps out of truck form and does a flip and while upside down blasts the Spirit of Vengeance right out of Ghost Rider. Ki Adi Mundi, Shaak Ti, and the riderless Kybuck goracing into the fray with Kybuck drawing first blood by trampling over Army Soldier #1. The Jedi break ranks and don't try but succeed in taking out the Better Than All of You leader Cobra Commander. Shaak Ti then puts her lightsaber into the gut of Sabu but she then sees Ki Adi Mundi get knocked to the side by an invisible attacker abd Kybuck gets its neck broken in the same manner. Shaak Ti then remembers to not trust her eyes because they can deceive her. She looks inward with her feelings and allows her focus to be her reality and although the attacking Predator never does make himself visible, it is as if she can see him as she uses her lightsaber to cut off his head. Shaak Ti runs over to Ki Adi Mundi to help him up but as she is tunning over to her friend he yells "Shaak Ti, look out"! It is then that Doc Hollidaywith hands even quicker than a Jedi's reflexes puts 2 .45 Long Colts into the back of Shaak Ti. Ki Adi pops open his lightsaber and is ready for his attack as he blocks the next 10 shots that Doc Holliday sends his way and then finishes him off with a quick stab to the heart. Skeletor was watching this chain of events take place and is very happy to see that he will not have to square off against both of the Jedi. He jumps infront of the tired Ki Adi Mundi with both his staff and sword drawn. Master Mundi moves at Skeletor thinking that his attacks will only be in the form of melee but before he gets close to Skeletor, the ruler of Snake Mountain blast Ki Adi's lightsaber out of his hand with his magical staff. Skeletor than pushes Ki Adi up against a close by rock wall by his neck with his staff and then uses his sword to run the Jedi through. With the death of Head Coach Cobra Commander Aquaman gets sick of both not being in the battle and of having a reputation of not being able to fight out of the water. So when the Atlantean sees Optimus Prime move into the desert area toward the rest of the fight Aquaman jumps out of the water to attack him. Prime is taken completely off guard as Aquaman uses his super-human strength to punch right into the steel body of Optimus. He knocks the mammoth Autobot onto the ground and begins pounding on him. The heavily damaged Optimus Prime's legs are completely disable but before Aquaman can destroy his spark Optimus enables his energon axe from his hand and uses it to cut Aquaman in half. Thanos decides that he needs to end this match once and for all and he believes that he has just found the way to do it. On the ground about 100 yards from where the fight originally began Thanos sees Mjonir, the hammer of Thor laying on the ground. In his hands, this ultra powerful weapon will spell certain doom for George Washington's Slaves. Thanos, who has the ability to lift over 100 tons goes to grab the weapon that Thor carries around so easily, but he is amazed to find that he cannot even budge the hammer, because he does not understand that Mjonir can of course onlyu be weilded by a being who is noble enough and worthy of its power. Thanos gives up after a couple of seconds knowing that if he cannot lift it than no one else on the battlefield can either. Thanos is not discouraged for long as he decides that he will just end this battle with his own amazing skills. Thanos flies up behind Cosmos ans easily blasts the Autobot into oblivion, which quickly cheers him up and restores his confidence in victory. Martian Manhunter flies toward Lex Luthor, dodging his attacks with ease. Martian Manhunter then flies directly at him at a tremendous speed and plows right through him and his suit destroying it on impact. The Manhunter turns to make sure Luthor is destroyed but he gets hit by a burst of magic from the ground. The blast from skeletor's staff knocks M.M. to the ground where both Skeletor and Thanos combine their powers toward M.M. and destroy him. Skeletor turns to his only other living teammate and says "is the battle over, is that everybody"? Thanos says "Optimus Prime is severely injured on the other side of the lake, we just have to finish him off". "Not done are team is" says a small voice from behind them. Skeletor turns to Thanos and says "that little guy is still alive as well". Thanos would normally be correct in the statement he makes next as he is turning around saying to Skeletor "we can take him togeather" but Thanos had not yet noticed that Yoda was holding his green lightsaber in his left hand and Mjonir, the Hammer of Thor (which is about the same size as him) in his right hand. As was said earlier, size and strength have nothing to do with Mjonir finding a person who is worthy enough to weild its power, and it is that power that Master Yoda combines withhis own as he jumps in to attack his 2 opponents. He flips inbetween the 2 of them, dodging their ranged attacks and uses his lightsaber to cut off Skeletor's head. He then blocks Thanos' cosmic blast and uses the force to direct that power as well as Mjonir back at Thanos, sending the hammer right into Thanos' skull.
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S SLAVES ARE VICTORIOUS AND ADVANCE!

8 comments:

Lickolas said...

Those are some sweet teams, I wonder who won.

Josh the Commish said...

Blogger sucks! It failed to save my post which is why there is no match posted underneath the teams. I have the match printed out. But I doubt I will have it up by tonight. Sorry for the inconvience.

Lickolas said...

That blows, well I can't wait to read it. The final consolation match will be finished tonight. By the way, I pissed someone off because of a match that I wrote. I think that means that I am officially a Watcher now.

Josh the Commish said...

Congrats friend, welcome to the club.

Josh the Commish said...

Sorry if there are spelling errors in this match, I was to tired to check them after all the problems I had with it. My Bad.

Joe said...

WEAK! The first confrontation of the entire fight was RVD getting killed and not even putting up a fight. That is not the whole f***ing show.

Josh the Commish said...

No comment from "Z"? What's up with that?

Artifact said...

I told Y'all mutha fukkaz!

Tremendous season, Joe. Great match. The little green one saves the day again.

-Fizz