Sunday, February 22, 2009

POP-SUPERSTAR HANNAH MONTANA & PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA’S “BEST OF BOTH WORLDS” TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDOS VS. THE RIGHT WING

I have been appointed by my brethren Joshatu and Ryatu to watch the following Year 2, Week 1 Match: Pop-Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos vs. The Right Wing.

Before the match, I shall enter the MGM Casino, now known as the locker room for the Commandos. The Commandos are Dave Bowman - The Starchild and Steven Hiller in an F-22 Fighter Jet.

Steven Hiller: Ready to rock and roll this match, Davey. My fighter’s on top of the casino so I’ll meet you out there.

Bowman: Yes, you will.

I then enter the Motor City Casino, now known as the locker room for the Right Wing. The Right Wing is The Pantheon: Incredible Hulk, Agamemnon, Achilles, Ajax, Andromeda, Atlanta, Cassiopeia, Delphi, Hector, Jason, Paris, Perseus, Prometheus, Ulysses I, Ulysses II and Elite Storm Trooper #1

Agamemnon: My friends. . . Let us listen to Delphi and Andromeda.

Delphi: I see that the surroundings we are about to be transported to will allow us to utilize all of our skills.

Andromeda: We shall band together, as we have in the past and valiantly fight today.

I transport the combatants to the Greektown neighborhood.

Members of the Right Wing rush to their positions on top of the various cafés, taverns and restaurants with their respective weapons, waiting for the Commandos to show themselves. Atlanta has his energy bow drawn. Perseus grips his energy spear. Hector has his energy flail in hand. Jason has weapons in each hand. Both Ulysses I and Ulysses II have their swords and shields drawn, ready to pounce on the first Commando to show himself. Finally, Elite Stormtrooper #1 has his laser rifle drawn.

Andromeda, Delphi and Paris are instructed by Agamemnon to gather into the Laikon Café. The three will use their “second senses” to assist their teammates in the upcoming battle.

Dave Bowman slowly walks down one of the main Greektown streets. He has not yet been noticed by the Right Wing, but he senses the various members’ locations and smiles. Bowman uses his “star powers” to communicate with Steve Hiller’s F-22. The combatants look to the sky and see the fighter scream across the sky.

Hiller: Okay guys, let’s give you my rendition of flaming cheese! [Hiller releases a rocket from his jet that explodes into the Laikon Café]. Opa!!!!

Andromeda, Delphi and Paris are blown to bits as the rocket leaves the Café a burnt husk. Hiller flies the jet back to the area after his first pass and his equipment allows him to see his teammate Bowman on the verge of being ambushed by Atlanta, Perseus, Hector, Jason, Ulysses I, Ulysses II and Elite Stormtrooper #1.

Hiller: Can’t have you stand on your own Bowman! Poppy’s gonna bring you a tossed Greek salad of Pantheon parts.

Hiller’s jet launches a full air strike, knowing that Bowman will survive the event. The buildings that the Pantheon teammates are on explode are instantly incinerated. Brick, mortar and steel spray throughout the entire battlefield. There is nothing left of all who were on the buildings. Atlanta, Perseus, Hector, Jason, Ulysses I, Ulysses II and Elite Stormtrooper #1 are dead.

Seeing their comrades fall so early on, Agamemnon, Ajax, Achilles, Hulk and Prometheus regroup in the Cyprus Taverna.

Agamemnon: He is but a man in a plane! Most of us are on the verge of being immortals! We kill him and we kill him now! Then, we destroy Bowman!

The remaining Right Wing combatants take to the streets, with their focus on Hiller. They scatter to different locations, but near enough that they can converge upon the unsuspecting Hiller. Hiller is in his cockpit and switches to infrared to see his enemies. He notices two signatures and lowers the plane to ground level. He wants to have a chance to use his guns too (killing things with bombs and rockets does the job, but not necessarily as fun). He only sees Agamemnon and Cassiopeia.

Hiller: Beauty and the Beast. How fitting to destroy you at the same time.

Just as Hiller is about to spray his guns, Ajax and Hulk land on the wings of the plane and begin to rip the wings’ plates off. Hiller attempts to rectify the situation by rocking the fighter back and forth, but is unable to knock the two off. Hiller then attempts to raise the plane. It is too late. The damage is done and his plane crashes the final few feet to the ground. Although the distance is not that far, Hiller is still jarred.

Hiller jumps out of the cockpit. He sees Bowman walking toward the situation and knows that if he can get to Bowman he will be safe. He does not make it. Achilles manages to catch Hiller first. He carries Hiller to Agamemnon.

Agamemnon: I destroy civilizations for fun to pass time and you, a mere human in his toy, manages to take out most of our team. . . a senseless pity.

Hiller: Why don’t you put me down and we’ll see how many others I can take out.

Agamemnon: I don’t think so. [He snaps Hiller’s neck like a twig].
Bowman is now only a couple hundred feet away from the remaining Pantheon members. The Pantheon stand their ground and are ready to fight. Cassiopeia uses her energies and strikes Bowman from the front. The energy dissipates near Bowman without explanation. Hulk and Ajax then take action and rush at Bowman from either side.

Hulk: Hulk smash!!!!

Ajax: You killed Atlanta!!!

As they reach out to pulverize Bowman, Bowman transforms into a “ghostlike” entity. Not able to stop, Hulk and Ajax hit each other with such force, the two knock themselves silly. Bowman then disappears.

Prometheus: My tracking sense shows that Bowman is. . . there! [He points to a newly formed Bowman].

Bowman looks at his enemies and tilts his head in recognition of what he must do. Hulk and Ajax begin to gain their senses. Achilles, Cassiopeia and Agamemnon form a battle line. Hulk and Ajax join them. They will strike Bowman with everything they have. The next thing they know Bowman warps reality and transports the remaining Pantheon members to a location yet to be determined. Although Hulk, Ajax, Achilles, Cassiopeia and Agamemnon survived the match, they lose the battle.

Agamemnon [looks at his surroundings and screams]: BOWMAN!!!!!!!!

Bowman wanders back to the MGM Casino. Although food is something from the past he will still enjoy Wolfgang Puck cooking his signature dishes.

POP-SUPERSTAR HANNAH MONTANA & PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA’S “BEST OF BOTH WORLDS” TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDOS IS VICTORIOUS!!!

3 comments:

Lickolas said...

Mad love for the Starchild.

That was great Bryan, I truly did not expect to win this match.

Shan said...

I would say good match... but COME ON BRYAN!! Little jealous I stole all of your people in the draft....I think so. We both know The Pantheon would have DESTROYED them!

Josh the Commish said...

Hells yeah Shan; good to hear from you! Pantheon & N.L. for life!