Week 7: Cowboy Killers vs The Sigmaz

 Cowboy Killers: Namor, Namorita, Triton, Dorma, 10 Atlanteons, 1000 Sunny Captain: Freya, Passengers: Harry Potter, Hermione Granger w/Star Sapphire, Professor McGonagall, Heimdall, 3 Super Soldiers

Sigmaz: Sanji, Zoro, Jinbe, Nico Robin, Franky (The Straw Hats) in the 1000 Sunny Rowena Ravenclaw, Goku, Harbinger, Enchantress, Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, Odin, Jiggly Puff 

Wow. What a spectacle. This is way better than Hogwarts Legacy, isn’t it? I say to my hippogriff, who has so majestically accompanied me upon this fine evening around Hogwarts Castle. The sun lowers, and a luminous glow from the ginormous castle replaces the sun in the night sky, twinkling off the Black Lake, which will grace us with its setting just about two hundred yards from where I float now.  

Just as I start to take in the atmosphere, I see a massive sailboat in the Thousand Sunny emerge from the faint fog on the north side of the lake, patrolled by Freya alongside Professor McGonagall and Heimdall, flanked by Harry and Hermione in the Mini Mary, and several robotic sharks coming from channel three. 

Toward the southwest side of the Lake, the Sigmaz also make their entrance, led by the Thousand Sunny. 

Wait… Both teams have the thousand Sunny?! That's hilarious! Well, next time, people will know to speak up when a vehicle on their own team is getting off-listed by someone else. Oh well. 

The difference is that the straw hats have a ridiculous amount of aura and expertise from piloting their very own ship, and are making a great first impression on this body of water. 

BWOOM!!!

Franky fires several shots of potent energy blasts from the Gaon Canon towards the phony thousand sunny on the other side of the battlefield as Sanji keeps restocking the cola ammunition. Harry and Hermione are the first victims of this onslaught as they get obliterated by a few perfectly landed shots to the Mini Mary, and a few more to the heart of the ship, breaking down its structural integrity. 

“INITIATE THE COUP DE BURST SEQUENCE,” Jinbe exclaims, “EXCEPT THIS TIME, WE AREN'T RUNNING AWAY!” 

Sanji uses the coup de burst, but instead, Jinbe manipulates the waves of the surrounding water to launch it towards the Cowboy Killers Sunny. 

“SANJI, NOW”!!!

Jinbe and Sanji, in one fluid motion, lunge the Thousand Sunny towards the three killaz left on their sunny and crush them, making their god-like nature seem puny in this world of magic. 

“I didn’t see that coming,” - Heimdall says to McGonagall and Freya seconds before the ensuing whiplash that overcame them. Unfortunately, in this heroic kamikaze attempt, Jinbe and Nico Robin were the only ones to jump off the ship before the collision, as Nico used her limbs to mimic an octopus, and Jinbe used the approaching water as a launching pad to stay afloat.

Namorita and Dorma take the charge ahead of Namor, Triton, the Super Soldiers, and Atlanteons of the Cowboy Killers and know it's time to retaliate. 

Namorita makes the first move by grabbing the necks of the floating 90’s slasher villains and lifts them out of the water… 

“This ain’t no Crystal Lake, and I ain't no fool,” says Namorita, hurling Jason and Michael towards the castle and piercing their bodies at the pointy tops of the Wizarding school. Namorita then drops back down to water at high speeds and is bitched by Odin, who sends an elegant, floating crescent kick, brutally killing the wife of Namor. 

Goku swims into the charging Dorma with confidence, PRAYING for a fight. But he is awfully surprised by how fluid Dorma's movements are in the water. Each punch Goku throws, Doma answers with a clean dodge and a robust jab. Each move by Dorma is visibly outclassing the Saiyan, making him feel more human than he has in a long time. Dorma can’t quite make the final blow, but the Atlanteons all come in with their daggers to stab Goku and take him out for good. Several Atlanteons were struck with fatal blows, erasing them from the skirmish, but a few made it out with Dorma alive. 

Enchantress and Rowena Ravenclaw aren't very mobile in the water, but are managing to survive to form and shoot shards of ice towards an off-guard Dorma. Dorma manages to dodge the first few waves but is finally overcome by full shots to his upper body, resulting in severe blood loss, leaving him for death. Triton, with elite speed, takes advantage of their one-dimensional dormant states and kills them both with precise strikes to the dome. 

Meanwhile, Jiggly Puff is having the time of her life singing and bouncing around in a prancing manner right over to the super soldiers and the retreated Atlanteans that fell back with their common brethren. She takes a seat right next to them and sings her lullaby, sinking the killaz and herself to the bottom of the lake in slumber. She was so content, she forgot she couldn’t breathe underwater herself. But I honestly don't think she cares. 

Namor, examining the battlefield, notices the alarming rate at which his teammates are falling. He takes a strong two-handed grip with his Trident of Neptune and confronts the remaining straw hats. With conviction, Namor swipes his weapon at the limbs of Nico Robin and turns her into a seafood platter, then makes a bloody mess of Jinbe, who did everything he could to match the water manipulation of the Submariner. 

Floating bodies are flooding the water, and blood clouds the vision of yours truly, and the two remaining members of each team, Namor and Triton ready to face off against Odin and Harbinger. 

I jump off my Hippogriff and get up close and personal with my snorkel gear underwater; this could get interesting, folks. 

Odin looks to his left and looks ahead, not too fond of the disadvantage he has against the two Water Adepts across from him. Odin's eyes roll in the back of his head, and the surrounding area begins to morph into a thick surrounding rock. The advantage has shifted-Harbinger shoots a yellow beam of energy towards a struggling above-surface Triton, disintegrating him where he stands, turning this battle on its head. Harbinger then sends a following energy blast towards Namor, which is narrowly evaded with Namor running towards the thriving cosmic being. Namor uses his trident to deliver multiple deadly gashes to the abdomen of Harbinger and is now left with Odin himself who is still in a fully concentrated state while also being impenetrable. Namor grabs his trident and crushes the rock-hard floor beneath, allowing him to resurface the water and regain his advantage. With one full flail of his arms he knocks Odin off balance and brings him back to earth. Odin sends several blasts of magma towards the King of Atlantis in attempt to throw him off, but Namor has reached his flow state. With a few sudden movements, Namor is face to face with the God of Wisdom, looking him in the eyes as he relieves him with a slow, sharp, thrust from his almighty trident.

Week 7 Watcher Consortium (The Black Lake): 1992 Space Movie vs The Sigmas

 1992 Space Movie: Abe Sapien, Aspen, Atlantean #9, Black Lantern Phibian, Kermit the Frog (w/ Glock Model 20 & Glock Model 40), Squirtle, Sharkticon #6 (final death), #7 (final death), & 9-10, Toad (Mario), Shinobi's Dog, Krypto, Buster (Thundercracker's Dog), Metamorpho, Goldberry (w/ a Star Sapphire), Ocean's Eleven:  Danny Ocean, Frank Catton, Robert Ryan, Reuben Tishkoff, Virgil Malloy, Turk Malloy, Livingston Dell, Bashar Tarr, Yen, Saul Bloom, & Linus Caldwell, Tommy Oliver:  The Green Ranger (w/ The White Lantern Ring), Teddy Roosevelt (in Hammer Bros. Suit), Homelander, Ice Climber #1 & 2, Twincast w/ Decibel & Legout

Sigmas: SpongeBob, Patrick, and Gary, Mario, Luigi, The Pillarmen: Esidisi, Kars, Wamuu, Santana, Corvus Glaive, The (DND) Krake Jabba The Hutt, Peter Griffin w/ Bulit Bill, Lois w/ A Blaster, Meg w/ Rito Bow, Chris w/ A Blaster, Brian w/ Flying Squirrel Suit, Stewey w/ Mini Mushroom, Muckman and Joe Eyeball, Rocksteady, Bebop, Dean Saglio, Bozo the Clown, Matt Leblanc, General Dwight D. Eisenhower, King Henry VII, Woodrow Wilson, C.J, Arnold Schwarznegger, James Buchannon, Jesse "The Body" Ventura, Blake Corum, Slash, Metal Head, Savanti Romero, Jordan Peterson, w/Fire Flower, and Israeli Special Forces #1-2

Week 7: The Underhills vs Grayson, Jack, & Ben’s Goobers

Overplains: Black Manta w/ Halberd, Mera, Percy Jackson w/ Green lantern Ring, Seacons (Nautilator, Seawing, Overbite, Skalor, Snaptrap, Tanktail), The Watcher in the Water, Bizarro Superman, Larfleeze, Jessica Cruz, Pro Bender #1-3

Grayson, Jack, & Ben’s Very Serious Peeps: Swamp Bender #1-3, Changeling (Beast Boy), King Shark, The Incredibles (Mr. Incredible, Elastigirl, Violet, Dash, Jack-Jack, Frozone), Arrietty & Pod Clock, Ace Duck, Vampire Allicon, Zombie Allicon, Funky Kong, Shadow the Hedgehog w/ All Chaos Emeralds, Espio the Chameleon, Sentry, Omniman, Doctor Octopus, David Schwimmer



The Great Lake, more commonly referred to as the Black Lake, will host not only its normal inhabitants like grindylows and merpeople, but also a match between two American League powerhouses. Each team’s respective might is honored by the chanting singing of the siren-like merpeople,

“AL, AL, AL, AL, AL, AL, AL, AL!!!”

Even the underwater magical beasts are aware of the American League’s hold over the well respected Fantasy Fantasy League. You can even make out the murmurs,

“Will the NL ever win a Universebowl? They’re unbelievably due, right?”

Alright, alright, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. The focus is this water based match here and now. The Underhills have elected to follow Black Manta’s lead and gameplan in the old sunken ship in which no one knows how it got there. Some have speculated similarity to the revered Edmund Fiztgerald (RIP). As they put together a battle strategy, they pay little attention to the fact that the Goobers are highly familiar with traversing kelp, thanks to the swamp benders, and have surrounded the ship on all sides.

Dash gets too impatient and moves to make a strike, however all his speedy legs manage to do underwater are move really slow and make a lot of commotion. Black Manta hears this and spears his Halberd through the child’s chest and manages to hit Arriety and Pod Clock behind him. Frozone moves to avenge his best friend’s kid and sends a volley of frozen shards at the ship wreck. He strikes down the pro benders and Skalor. Mera calls to her leadership,

“We’re floating dead here! We need to retreat to a better vantage point!”

Black Manta doesn’t even need to give the order, the Watcher in the Water charges front and center taking the attention of all the Goobers. As the Goobers try to manage the great tentacles, the rest of the Underhills retreat to the village of the Selkie colony (merpeople). The Watcher is tanking hits from all sides, unaffected, while the tentacles start grabbing some of the Goobers. Ace Duck, Espio the Chameleon, the allicons, and even David Schwimmer are pulled in and swallowed whole. Omniman is unable to stand idle for any longer and speeds through the Watcher in the Water, splitting the great beast in half.

The merpeople are reluctant to allow these foreigners into their village, but fear they could not stop them if they tried, so the Underhills are allowed entry. Black Manta counts their numbers and reestablishes a plan of attack on the Goobers. They won’t be caught off guard next time.

The Goobers also take a moment to mourn the fallen and prepare for battle once again. There’s no question where the Underhills went, it’s just a matter of how they want to approach. Omniman sees the merpeople as lesser beings and not worth protecting from harm, but his argument falls short as the remaining team members don’t take the suggestion well. Follow the lead of the Incredibles, Omniman will.

As the Goobers make their approach to the village, the Underhills take notice… but they aren’t the only ones to. Again the silly Goobers plan of attack is initially foiled as Doctor Octopus tries to make an elaborate and quick entrance, but unfortunately his name is a misnomer and is not well traveled underwater. The seacons take note and crush the metal arms along with the mad minded doctor. Shadow the Hedgehog, having possession of all the chaos emeralds, shows the true meaning of speed as his Super Shadow form is able to traverse the water at remarkable speeds with an invulnerability that shreds through the seacons. Super Shadow appears unstoppable until he meets an immovable object in Bizarro Superman and his own high speed crushes his body against the stronger being.

The remaining Incredibles attempt to join the battle, but I fear these characters aren’t much useful in moving quickly underwater. Even the invisible girl, Violet, is seen underwater by tracking the waves of water moving. It allows Mera and Percy Jackson to combine their superior water skillset to takedown the beloved red spandex super family. Frozone is again left alive and he sends more frozen shards towards the Underhills. This time he’s unsuccessful in hitting anyone, but rather accidentally freezes the water surrounding him and he becomes a popsicle, a rather easy target for Black Manta to shoot at.

Beast Boy and King Shark finally check into the battle and take on the man in a water suit, Black Manta. He tries to evade but is unsuccessful in dodging King Shark’s mouth. Funky Kong and the swamp benders flank the two water animal teammates, but are quickly shut down by the incoming lantern bearers. Larfleeze and Jessica Cruz take down the flank, but King Shark chomps up Jessica Cruz. Larfleeze with the help of Mera takes down the two water animals in King Shark and Beast Boy.

Few remain floating alive in this battle. Fortunately for the Goobers, Omniman’s vast battle experience has never experienced defeat. He moves swiftly and separates Percy Jackson’s head from his torso. Larfleeze floats frozen, shocked by the swiftness, only for Sentry to do the same to the orange bearing lantern.

Mera doesn’t know how to respond, but Bizarro has stepped in trying to take on both Sentry and Omniman. For some reason she does not feel fear, but instead a flicker of curiosity sparks in her, as she feels a large movement of water beneath them. She looks down to see a pair of yellow glowing eyes, unable to make out a figure but can tell the massive size of the creature. The Creature from the Black Lake covers ground quickly and pulls the trio of heavy hitters down to the bottom of the lake. Mera remains… confused, and the sound of fighting slowly diminishes into the depths below…