Universe Bowl XI

 *(-4) denotes character is on their last death.

FOREST (Kyle)-

Misunderstood Little People: Link, Harambe, General Luminara (w/ green lantern), Barriss Offee (w/ blue lantern), Mother Talizin (w/ indigo lantern), Nightsister Spirit, Neo (w/ two white lightsabers, -4) and Atrocitus

Dinomites: OwlMan (-4), Wonder Woman, Wonder Girl, Talon (-4), Darkseid, Dark Supergirl, Johnny Quick (-4) and Power Ring (-4)

This Universe Bowl starts off with Link, Luminara and her Padawan Barriss Offee working together to take on OwlMan. At first OwlMan is holding his own against the trio using a myriad of his Owl themed gadgets and by flying around, dodging force pushes, sword and lightsaber strikes, and lantern abilities. Eventually he hits Link with the OwlMan equivalent of a Batarang right in the chest. Barriss Offee rages (foreshadowing her eventual turn to the darkside) and force jumps up in the air, surrounding him in a force shield with her Blue Lantern Ring and then proceeds to choke him to death. OwlMan eventually falls to his death. Luminara then runs to Link trying to heal him using her force powers but as she is doing that Talon comes out from the bushes and hits her in the carotid artery with a throwing knife.

Neo and Talon recognize each other's martial arts skills and decide to have a fight with no weapons. After a long and tedious fight, eventually Neo wins because he was just too fast for Talon, eventually kicking him in the chest so hard that he flew up into the air and was impaled by a tree branch. 

Barriss Offee, Mother Talizin and Nightsister Spirit then work together to fight Wonder Woman and Wonder Girl. Barriss Offee goes to use her Blue Lantern Ring but is not able to get it to work as she is not filled with hope anymore, but rather hatred. Wonder Girl uses her lasso to wrap up the Nightsister Spirit and channels Zues’ lightning to vaporize the Spirit. Barriss Offee advances towards Wonder Woman with an overhead lightsaber strike. Wonder Woman goes to block it with her sword but the sword stood no chance against the saber as it went right through the sword. As Wonder Woman is dodging a fury of lightsaber strikes from the enraged Padawan, Mother Talizin is dealing with Wonder Girl. She has surrounded herself in a force shield and is shooting her green force lightning strikes at Wonder Girl, but Wonder Girl is too agile for any of them to hit. Mother Talizin then decides to hit Wonder Woman with a lighting strike, this causes Wonder Girl to turn her back and look at Wonder Woman and as she does this Talizin uses her Magick derived lightsaber to stab Wonder Girl in the back, killing her.

Johnny Quick sees that Wonder Woman is struggling with Talizin and Offee so he runs over to help her. Quick runs up to Offee, grabs her and runs up to the tallest pine tree in the forest and impales her through the top of the tree. As he does this he does not realize that he was doing this on Harambe’s tree. Harambe uses his strength to grab Quick and throw him off the tree, killing him. Harambe then climbs down the tree to help Talizin with Wonder Woman. 

Harambe stands no chance to Wonder Woman and eventually she rips his jaw open, killing him. Talizin uses her Magick powers to defend herself but is definitely struggling, just when she is about to lose due to being too tired, a White Lightsaber cuts Wonder Woman in half from head-to-toe. None other than Neo has defeated her. 

UPDATE: Little People have Neo, Mother Talizin and Atrocitus left while Dinomites have Darkseid, Dark Supergirl and Power Ring left. Power Ring sees that Mother Talizin is weak after her fight with Wonder Woman and uses her Ring to shoot an energy blast at Talizin killing her. Atrocitus then begins to attack Power Ring. While this is happening Neo tries to distract Darkseid and Dark Supergirl. Atrocitus and Power Ring have a great battle, but eventually Atrocitus begins to struggle against Power Ring as his power is just too great for Atrocitus. 

Atrocitus yells to Neo “WE DON’T HAVE ENOUGH POWER TO DEFEAT THEM!!!”. Neo nods and they both retreat. Neo heads to the City while Atrocitus goes to space. Power Ring, Darkseid and Dark Supergirl follow Neo to the city.

   

WATER (Kyle) - 

Half-sized Humans: Ganthet (w/ orange lantern ring and dwarf ring #3), Sayd (w/ star sapphire and dwarf ring #4), and Aircraft Carrier containing: Fantastic Max, AB, FX, Salacious B. Crumb, Thundercracker, and Skywarp

Malnourished Extinct Animals: Emperor Joker (w/ green lantern ring; -4), Orange Lantern Lex Luther (-4), Indigo Lantern Ray Palmer (-4), Yellow Lantern Scarecrow (-4) and Aquaman

This battle starts off with Emperor Joker doing whatever he wants (because he’s the Joker with Mr. Mxyzptlk powers). He kills Ganthet and Sayd, but he also kills Indigo Lantern Ray Palmer and Orange Lantern Lex Luthor. 

Aquaman doesn’t want to lose anymore of his teammates so he decides to use his power of telepathy with sea creatures and calls a SMACK! (yes that’s really what it’s called) of Box Jellyfish to repeatedly sting Joker with enough venom in each sting to kill 60 humans.  

All that’s left for the Little People is the aircraft carrier. Thundercracker and Skywarp launch off of the aircraft carrier and begin to engage Yellow Lantern Scarecrow. At first Scarecrow is able to hold his own but his Scarecrow powers don’t work on the Transformers (because they’re robots) and eventually the transformers are just too much for him and they defeat him.

Aquaman then uses a combination of his trident and multiple Pods of Whales to flip the Aircraft Carrier. He then one by one drags each remaining member of the Little People, one-by-one to the bottom of the ocean where they will drown. BECAUSE AQUAMAN BOPS IN WATER. 

Aquaman will meet with the rest of his teammates in the City.  

ARCTIC (Zach) - 

Halflings: Zombie Green Lantern (-4), Vampire Batman, Darth Maul (w/ red lantern ring; -4), Hermes

Famished Ded Animals from Big Rock: Captain America (w/ green and blue lantern rings), Winter Soldier (-4), Shazam, Larry Koopa (w/ ice flower) 

As we pan over to the desolate cold of the arctic, 8 competitors are dropped off, 4 from each side. Winter Soldier is blatantly angered and worried, “Last time I was in a place this cold I fell to what we thought was my death, right Steve... right?” Maul exclaims, “Wait! You fell from a really high place and left for dead, too?” Buck responds, “This dude has some weird markings on him. Can I kill him, Steve?” Maul responds very pissed off, “Excuse me? Do you even know who I am? I was the apprentice to the great sith lord! You nor anyone here can kill me! My hatred for  K E N O B I will keep me alive until I can kill him!” Shazam comes closer and does his little sparky spark thingy and zaps Maul, leaving him limp in the freezing snow. Hermes, son of Zeus, says, “Hey, my dad can do something like that. Have you heard of him, the greek god?” Shazam scoffs, “Zeus? I’m him plus 5 other gods, I’m better than him in every aspect.” The statement outrages Hermes so he grabs Larry Koopa and snaps his neck with his bare hands.

Meanwhile, Vampire Batman has been blending in with his surroundings and sneaks up behind the Dinos and places an explosive diddly do da from his magic belt that somehow always has something for every situation onto Winter Soldier. It explodes and his metal arm is separated from his body while simultaneously killing Winter Soldier. Cap runs to his lifelong friend’s side as his last breath leaves him. Cap announces, “I will AVENGE you,” (cause ya know, can’t save him, he’s gotta let him die so he can do avenging). Cap charges towards the zombie green lantern, who is merely nothing compared to both a green and blue lantern ring, and simply obliterates him into a million pieces. This plays as the perfect distraction for Batman to jump at Cap, but Shazam has been carefully watching and gathers the largest thunderbolt ever and destroys Batman. Unfortunately, Shazam didn’t care too much for Cap so the bolt killed both parties in the act.

Now with two greek legends remaining, only one option is the obvious choice if one were to bet on such events. Hermes, knowing he will lose this fight one on one, decides to pray upon his father Zeus and beg him to send a lightning bolt to revert Shazam back to a mere boy. Zeus does not answer and leaves his son to do his own work. Shazam smirks, “Nice try,” as he super speed rips Hermes in half. Although Zeus wanted his son to fight his own battle, he is still angered in his death and sends down a lightning bolt to which nothing but Billy Batson is left. This is all Maul needed to see to make one final stand, throwing his red saber towards the child and slices Billy’s head clean off. Maul’s hatred for Kenobi kept him alive this long… but no more.

DESERT (Ethan)- 

Midgets: (Lando Calrissean (-4) (pilot), Nien Numb (co-pilot), Lobot (-4) (gunner), & ALF (-4) (rear gunner) in The Outrider), (The Mandalorian (w/ The Darksaber) & The Child (w/ blue lantern ring) w/ Rick (w/ a red lightsaber) & Morty (w/ a flame thrower) in Mando's Ship), Omega Supreme, Duncan Idaho, Mighty Mouse, and Quasar.

Dinomites: General Zod, Ursa, Non (-4)

Zod, Ursa, and Non fly in formation searching for their enemy. The Outrider and the Razor Crest spot the trio a bit out and begin preparing for the first exchange. Lobot and ALF begin the fight by firing their heavy lasers. Zod is hit once, which throws him off his balance and disorients him, but only for a moment. Realizing that their lasers have a reduced effect, they tell Lando to ready a missle. Zod, Ursa, and Non begin flying more erratically now that they are close. The first missile misses its target and airbursts behind the trio, pushing them forward. Both ships dive for the desert hills as the Kryptonians begin badgering their shields with heat vision. Just as they reach the second hill, the Outrider loses an engine, sending it spiraling out of control. Ursa stops to finish off any survivors, while Zod and Non continue the pursuit. 

The shields on the Razor Crest are just about out of power, when Mando gets the ready signal from the rest of his team. As they pass a large stone outcrop, Omega Supreme opens up a large attack on Zod and Non, who are forced to brace. Mando quickly puts down the Crest, and disembarks with the rest of the crew. Non tells Zod to take care of the others, while he holds off the behemoth Autobot. Zod reaches the remainder of the Midgets, who have grouped up. As he plans his next move, Mighty Mouse sneaks over and unleashes a flurry of upper cuts at the same time Quasar begins hounding him from above. Zod evades and grabs Duncan Idaho who is no match for the godlike Zod. Using Duncan as a shield, Zod blocks Morty’s flames, but he is struck by Mando and the darksaber in the arm. Zod becomes disoriented as he is battered and encircled. Ursa, seeing her master in need, begins yelling as she beats Rick and Morty into the sand. Zod quickly gets to his feet, but Quasar grabs him and Mighty Mouse and teleports them further away. Turning to Mando, Ursa moves for the kill, but just as she reaches him, she becomes stuck in place. Mando delivers a killing slice with the darksaber and the child coos.

Zod finally gets his hands on Mighty Mouse and tries to crush him, but the rodent is pushing back with all of his might. Zod overcomes Mighty Mouse, flicking the matter from his hand. Quasar knows he doesn’t stand much against Zod alone, so he signals to Mando to meet him near Omega Supreme and Non, who are still deep in battle. Omega Supreme and Non had both tore up much of the surrounding area by the time anyone else would reach them. Zod gets close to Non and begins helping him in his battle against the Autobot. Zod manages to freeze one of Omega’s arm joints, and Non shatters it. Mando and the Child arrive at the battle, where Quasar explains that one of the Kryptonians must die before Omega or this battle will be lost. The three midgets decide Zod is the best target, as he is the most injured. Quasar entraps Zod in some quantum cage and tries to hold him in place as Mando lunges forward with the Darksaber. Zod uses his heat vision in an attempt to escape, but glasses the surrounding area instead. As the Darksaber makes contact, Zod releases a large blast of energy, but Quasar absorbs much of it, protecting Mando, at the cost of his own life. Mando, the Child, and Omega Supreme manage to kill the last Kryptonian. Omega Supreme, heavily damaged from the battle, powers down after the fight.

SPACE (Kyle) - 

Misunderstood Little People: Falco and R.O.B. in a jedi V-Wing Starfighter, Ratts Tyrelle in Naboo Starfighter, Richie Rich and Dollar Bill in TIE Bomber, Star Fox in ArWing, Star Wolf in ArWing, Peppy Hare in ArWing, Deep Space Nine Command Crew:  Alexander the Great w/ Bucephalus, James Madison (w/ a speed ring (-4)), & Tyrrion Lannister (w/ Dwarf Ring #1 (-4)); piloted by: Vorian Atreides, FA-4, & Slippy Toad and Atrocitus 

Dinomites: Ultraman (-4), Ranx the Sentient City, Wedge in his X-Wing, Biggs in his X-Wing

The Little People see Ranx and decide they need to focus on the Sentient City. So Falco, Ratts Tyrelle, Richie Rich, Peppy Here and Deep Space Nine Command Crew focus on the City. Star Fox and Star Wolf have the Dogfight of a lifetime with Wedge and Biggs. Star Fox and Star Wolf show their impressive flight skills while Wedge and Biggs aren’t as talented pilots but make up for it with how well they know how to work together. 

Eventually Star Wolf gets on Wedge’s Tail and is chasing him through the empty vacuum of space. Wedge calls for help from his partner Biggs and Biggs comes to help as he hits Star Wolf with a Torpedo round destroying his ship. Wedge and Biggs then work together and both get on Star Fox’s Tail. Star Fox shows impressive dodging skills as Wedge and Biggs are trying to hit him with shots but can’t even come close to hitting him. Star Fox sees an opportunity and takes it. He slams on his brakes so that he can get behind Wedge and Biggs, Top Gun style and then proceeds to hit them both with his plasma cannon, defeating them both.

While that was happening Ranx called Ultraman to help. Ultraman goes on a rampage just flying through ships, hitting them with lazers and freezing them so they don’t work. After this rampage is done he’s defeated Falco and R.O.B., Ratts Tyrelle, Richie Rich and Dollar Bill, Peppy Here and Deep Space Nine Command Crew.

Star Fox is left on his own to try and survive against Ranx and Ultraman. Star Fox is very quick in his ArWing and is unhittable from Ultraman and Ranx’s perspective.

As Ranx and Ultraman are focused on trying to defeat Star Fox, Atrocitus comes up from the Forest. He sees that Ranx and Ultraman are focused on Star Fox. He realizes what he must do. He sneaks into the center of the Sentient City and focuses all of his rage onto his Red Lantern Ring. A bright red flash happens, blinding to the eye. 

After several seconds, the bright red flash has disappeared, pieces of the Sentient City are floating all over space and Star Fox’s ship has been destroyed. Ultraman has a metal rod presumably from the explosion right through his chest, he then falls towards the playoff planet and dies from a combination of the metal in his chest and the fall.  

CITY (Chris) - 

White Lantern Yoda (originally:  Yoda's Spirit w/ White Lantern Ring & 5th Ring of the Dwarf Lords)., X-23 (w/ red lightsaber (-4))., Sinestro (w/ yellow and green lantern rings (-4))., Neo (w/ 2 white lightsabers (-4))., Black Lantern Magneto (-4)., Mando with the Dark Saber, The Child with Blue Lantern Ring

Superwoman (-4), Superman Prime, Ronan w/RL Ring (-4), The Flash, Darkseid, Dark Supergirl, Aquaman, Power Ring (-4)

The Mandalorian lands effortlessly in the back streets of the city where the rest of the Midgets have regrouped for the last battle and hands Grogu to WL Yoda. While the two of them communicate using their fancy Jedi telepathy, Mando goes over important strategies with the rest of the team and also discusses why there are so many different colors of lightsabers on this squad. Like seriously, every year I feel like I’m googling a new color of lightsaber or lantern ring. The plan is pretty simple: Leave Yoda and Grogu meditating in the narrow street as bait while the rest of them tuck into doorways and alleyways to sneak attack.

Yoda sets Grogu down carefully and the two face each other, sitting indian style (feather, not dot) and they begin their meditative trance while the Midgets take their places.

Superman Prime is the first to lock onto their location and directs the rest of the Dinomites to follow. As usual, he lands with one of those super gay superhero landings where they are on one knee and looking down. You know, the Kapernick pose. He rises slowly for dramatic effect but literally no one cares. He’s just wasting time and this match is already like 8 months late. He throws a couple quick blasts of heat vision at the little green guys that gets deflected off the protective aura the duo have cast around themselves. Running at top speed, Superman Prime attempts to break through the force field but just as he is about to collide with it, he gets knocked sideways by a construct from Sinestro’s ring as he leaps from the shadows. As the other Dinomites rush in to help, Yoda reaches out deeper with the force and expands the range of his protective bubble, trapping Superman Prime inside where the rest of the Midgets are waiting for their first ambush. 

The Dinomites stand outside helplessly watching as Superman Prime is quickly outnumbered. Ronan and Power Ring use their magic ring thingies to try and penetrate the shield. Supes is defending on multiple fronts and as he attempts to hold off Sinestro and Neo, X-23 leaps from behind and buries her claws in his neck. Superman yells out in pain. He eyes the easiest target and in a final stand, charges Mando knocking him backwards. He rips his helmet off in rage and manages to cave Mando’s skull in before Neo is finally able finish Superman by running him through with his lightsabers. The young Grogu senses the death of his partner and friend and the force bond with Yoda is broken and the Dinomites rush in. 

Aquaman uses his long reach to pierce his trident through the torso of X-23 who falls lifelessly at his feet. He wastes little time before removing the weapon and heaving it through the air towards Neo. Black Lantern Magneto quickly reverses the trident back to the sender, catching the off balance Aquaman perfectly in the side of the head killing him instantly.  

“Woah!” Neo exclaims at his near death experience. 

His relief is short-lived as the Flash knocks him on his ass and Superwoman drops in to swing him around like a rag doll. She uses him as a bat to beat Magneto back and then just slams his limp body into the ground a dozen times like she's beating out an old rug. 

Power Ring uses his… well his ring. That's all he has. He uses his ring to grab the little Grogu and while grasping the little one by his adorable green ears, he pushes his thumbs into those precious little eyes of his and into his brain. 

Yoda is sensing defeat as Dark Supergirl and Superwoman corner Magneto while Ronan and Darkseid descend upon Sinestro. Hoping there is still someone else out there, he channels all of his life force into an ever growing orb of energy in his hands. As the orb continues to grow in size, the light and heat emitting from it are becoming exponentially intense with each passing moment. The Flash takes off just as the orb explodes, destroying everyone and turning every building in the city to rubble. 

Season 12 Draft List

 1. 5 Fire Benders

2. 5 Water Benders

3. 6 earth benders

4. 4 Air Benders

5. 2 Metal Benders

6. 2 Blood Benders

7. 2 Swamp Benders

8. 2 Sand Benders

9. 2 Combustion Benders

10. Obi Wan Kenobi's Spirit (20)

11. Moff Gideon w/ 5 Phase 3 Dark Troopers (18, 1)

12. Weapon H (55)

13. Team Invincible:  Omni Man, Battle Beast, Invincible, Thrag, & Allen the Alien (20, 80)

14. Luke Skywalker's Spirit (20)

15. Nekron w/ 5 Black Lanterns (40)

16. George Romero w/ 5 Zombies (6)

17. Vlad the Impaler w/ 5 Vampires (15)

18. Zack and Spence:  Woke White Folk from Wakanda

19. The Ambiguously Gay Duo of Kyle and Conner

20. Artifact:  The Asgardian Dolemite

21. Zero Carbon Foot Print Triple Change Go-Bot Ed-Prime

22. Sith Decepticon Cassette Target Master Josh

23. Princess Leia of the Salad Kingdom and Pokemon Trainer Scarlet w/ Piplup, Evee, & Detective Pikachu

24. Crack Frank:  CEO & Fast Food Mogul w/ 5 Elite Dank Troopers.

25. Pre-Flood Methusalah Dave Parks 

26. Ethan:  Rabbit-Fish Man Assassin w/ Water-proof Beskar Armor

27. Avatar Alex:  The Last Fart Bender and Velociraptor riding Young Jedi Knight Grayson

28. Bo Katan and her friend (18, 10, 24)

29. Karen Carpenter (6)

30. Revan Reborn (50)

31. Blue Marvel (55)

32. Chip and Dale (4, 6)

33. Literally Ur Ol' Lady (6)

34. Carl Grissom (6)

35. Pete Rose (6)

36. Cara Dune and Greef Karga (12, 12, 22)

37.  3 Air Bending Staffs

38. 5 Mandalorians

39. Mandalore the Great (30)

40. Red lightsaber

41. Green lightsaber

42. double bladed lightsaber

43. 2 Colt 1911 .45 ACP pistols

44. A Covid-19 Gun

45. Trade Federation Droid Control Ship 

46. Joe Biden (600

47. Kamal Harris (6)

48. Kyle Rittenhouse (6)

49. Michael Corvin (28)

50. Jared Nomak (28)

51. Morg (35)

52. The Last Ronin (18)

53. Oroku Hiroto (20)

54. Wendigo (35)

55. Tyndall & Velanna (6, 12)

56. Mud-Butt (10)

57. Magma (35)

58. Chromia (35)

59. Trailbreaker (35)

60. Grapple (35)

61. Red Alert (35)

62. Devcon (35)

63. Tornedron (90)

64. Dion (28)

65. 5 Allicons

66. King Grayskull (40)

67. Roboto (25)

68. Meteorbs:  Cometroid, Comet Cat, Astrolion, Tuskor, & Ty-Gorr (15, 35)

69. Snout Spout (18)

70.  Gabby Kinney (15)

71. Kimura (25)

72. Condiment King (8)

73. Jericho (20)

74. Kid Devil (18)

75. CEC YT-2400

76. A Hammerhead Corvette

77. Lambda Class Shuttle

78. Theta Class Shuttle

79. A Firespray 31

80. A-Wing

81. TIE Interceptor

------------------------------------------- 

82. Orc Combo Pack

83. The Protectobots

84. Nazgul #7's Mordor Horse

85. Treebeard

86. Black Lantern Batman

87. King Kong

88. John Rambo

89. Jedi Knight Combo Pack

90. Bebop and Rocksteady

91. Macho Man Randy Savage

92. Michelangelo Hamato

93. Beast Boy

94. Apocalypse

95. Odin

96. Dick Grayson (Batman) & Damien Wayne (Robin)

97. Vampire Neo

98. Elastigirl & Violet

99. Black Flash

100. Supreme Leader Snoke

101. The Balrog of Moria

102. Black Lantern Emperor Palpatine

103. Mr. Mxyztplk

104. Asajj Ventress w/ Nightsister Acolyte

105. Vampire Green Lantern (common)

106. Yoda

107. Indigo One and Monk

108. Nazgul #9's Mordor Horse

109. Ethan Hunt

110. Geonosian Spy, Geonosian Drone, & Geonosian Soldier w/ ships

111. Zombie Combo Pack

112. Balrog Combo Pack

113. Polaris

114. Arsenal

115. Cyborg Superman

116. Capt. Marvel

117. Wolverine

118. Cybertronian Guardian Combo Pack

119. Goblin Combo Pack

120. Dr. Manhattan

121. SHIELD Agent Combo Pack

122. Rebel Soldier Combo Pack

123. Decepticon Combo Pack

124. Vampire Combo Pack

125. Hammer Bros. Combo Pack

126. Abeloth

127. White Lantern Kyle Raynor

128. Yellow Lantern Combo Pack

129. Terminator Combo Pack

130. Jar Jar Binks

131. Hancock

132. Fedayeen Combo Pack

133. Full Spectrum Kyle Raynor

134. Phibian Combo Pack

135. Sharkticon Combo Pack

136. Salak

137. Steppenwolfe

138. Spinosaurus Combo Pack

139. Riders of Rohan Combo Pack

140. Black Bolt

141. The Guardian Knights

142. Death Trooper Combo Pack

143. White Lantern Batman

144. Strom Trooper Combo Pack

145. Blue Lantern Combo Pack

146. Red Lantern Combo Pack

147. Jedi Master Combo Pack

148. Fremen Combo Pack

149. Cosmic Spider-Man

150. Gondor Soldier Combo Pack

151. John Stewart

152. Non

153. Ronan the Accuser

154. Ultraman, Owlman, Talon, Superwoman, Power Ring, & Johnny Quick

155. Emperor Joker

156. Winter Soldier

157. Orange Lantern Lex Luthor, Indigo Lantern Ray Palmer, & Yellow Lantern Scarecrow 

158. Barris Offee

159. X-23

160. Sinestro

161. Neo

162. Link

163. Darth Maul

164. Black Lantern Magneto

165. Lando Calrissean, Lobot, & Nien Numb

166. ALF

167. James Madison

168. Tyrrion Lannister

169. Zombie Green Lantern (common).

Season 12 Schedule

Pre-Season
At George Murphy's/Fox Creek
100 Points
Prize: A green lantern ring
-TEAM Vs. Affirmative Action Popeye's (Zack)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. Be Gentle It's My Third Time (Kyle)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins (Democracy)
-George Washington's House Elves Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (Ethan)
-The Dramatic Kittens of Luna Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (consortium)
-Crack Danks Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (Josh)

Week 1
At The Pit (from Parks and Recreation)
75 Points
Prize:  A Wiimote and Go-Kart
-TEAM Vs. George Washington's House Elves (Dave)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. The Dramatic Kittens of Luna (Josh)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. Crack Danks (Chris)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (Frank)
-Be Gentle it's My Third Time Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (democracy)
-Affirmative Action Popeye's Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (consortium)

Week 2
In The City of Detroit, MI
220 Points
Prize:  4 Glocks
-TEAM Vs. The Dramatic Kittens of Luna (Chris)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. Crack Danks (Josh)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (consortium)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (Laya)
-Be Gentle it's My Third Time Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (Frank)
-Affirmative Action Popeye's Vs. George Washington's House Elves (democracy)

Week 3
In and around the lost city of Atlantis (water match)
475 Points
Prize:  An Indigo Lantern Ring
-TEAM VS. Crack Danks (Zack)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (Chris)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (Alex)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (Kyle)
-Be Gentle It's My Third Time Vs. George Washington's House Elves (consortium)
-Affirmative Action Popeye's VS. The Dramatic Kittens of Luna (democracy)

Week 4
In Deep Space
600 Points
Prize:  Beskar Armor (including Beskar staff, blasters and jetpack).
-TEAM Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (Josh)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (Ethan)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (democracy)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. George Washington's House Elves (Ed)
-Be Gentle it's My Third Time Vs. The Dramatic Kittens of Luna (consortium)
-*FAST FOOD ARMAGEDDON* Affirmative Action Popeyes Vs. Crack Danks (Kyle)

Week 5
On The Playoff Planet
800 Points
Prize:  X-Wing
-TEAM Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (Ethan)
-*UNIVERSE BOWL REMATCH* Two Hungry Dino-Mite with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (Kyle)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. George Washington's House Elves (Democracy)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. The Dramatic Kittens of Luna (Consortium)
-Be Gentle It's My Third Time Vs. Crack Danks (Josh)
-Affirmative Action Popeyes Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (Pogo)

Week 6
At The Southern Air Temple
450 Points
Prize:  TIE Fighter
-TEAM Vs. Be Gentle It's My Third Time (Chris)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins (Josh)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. Affirmative Action Popeyes (Frank)
-George Washington's House Elves Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (democracy)
-The Dramatic Kittens of Luna Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (consortium)
-Crack Danks Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (Zack)

Week 7
On the Jundland Wastes of Tatooine
325 Points
Prize:  T-16 Skyhopper
-TEAM Vs. Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins (Josh)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. The Striders of Rohan (Ethan)
-Affirmative Action Popeyes Vs. Be Gentle It's My Third Time (democracy)
-George Washington's House Elves Vs. Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids (consortium)
-The Dramatic Kittens of Luna Vs. Crack Danks (Josh)
-The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (Chris)

Week 8
Deep in Fangorn Forest
200 Points
Prize:  Jeep Wrangler
-TEAM VS. The Striders of Rohan (Josh)
-Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. Affirmative Action Popeyes (consortium)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. Be Gentle It's My Third Time (Frank)
-George Washington's House Elves VS. Crack Danks (Kyle)
-The Dramatic Kittens of Luna Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (democracy)
-Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions  (Chris)

Week 9
In The Batcave
55 Points
Prize:  A blue lightsaber and Katana blade
-TEAM Vs. Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight (Josh)
-The Striders of Rohan Vs. Be Gentle It's My Third Time (consortium)
-Ahsoka's Acrobatic Assassins Vs. Affirmative Action Popeyes (Chris)
-George Washington's House Elves Vs. The Dramatic Kittens of Luna (democracy)
-Crack Danks Vs. Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions (Zack)
-Spence and Vader's House of Sith Aids Vs. The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets (Dave)

Season XI National League Playoffs Round Two

Mistaken Small People: Omega Supreme, Yoda’s Spirit w/ White Lantern Ring and 5th Ring of the Dwarf Lords, Atrocitus, Starscream w/ Orange Lantern Ring, Black Lantern Magneto, He-Man, Battle Cat, Neo w/ 2 White Lightsabers, Count Dooku w/ Yellow Lantern Ring, Achilles, Queen Aga'po, Luminara Unduli w/ Green Lantern Ring, Barriss Offee w/ Blue Lantern Ring, Symbiote Suit Spiderman, Mother Talzin w/ Indigo Lantern Ring, Nightsister Spirit, Nazgul #9 on Fell Beast, Sinestro w/ Green and Yellow Lantern Rings, Ganthet w/ 3rd Ring of the Dwarf Lords, Sayd w/ 4th Ring of the Dwarf Lords, X-23, Super Saiyan Conner Weidman w/ Blue Lantern Ring in Conner’s Overpriced Mazda, Zombie Predator... and now all of Josh’s vehicle assignments... Lando Calrissean, Nien Numb, Lobot, & ALF in The Millennium Falcon; The Mandalorian, The Child w/ a Blue Lantern Ring, & Quill in Mando's Ship; Vorian Atreides & Kobe Bryant w/ Indigo Lantern Ring in Apache Helicopter; James Madison w/ Speed Ring, James Monroe w/ The Darksaber, Tyrion Lannister w/ The 1st Ring of the Dwarf Lords, & Alexander the Great w/ Bucephalus are The Command Crew of Deep Space Nine, piloted by FA-4 & Slippy Toad; Falco & R.O.B. the Robot in Jedi V-Wing Star Fighter; Ratts Tyrelle in Naboo Starfighter; Richie Rich & Dollar Bill in a TIE Bomber

The First President’s Slaves #BLM: Gandalf the Grey w/ Elven Ring, Thor, Set, Godzilla, Iron Man, Colossus, Luke Skywalker in Luke’s Stealth X-Wing, Sandworm #1-3, Superman, Black Lantern Sandworm, Vampire Sandworm, Zombie Sandworm, Seaworm, Soundwave, Rumble, Frenzy, Ravage, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw, Ratbat, Wingthing, Squawktalk, Beastbox, Glit, Enemy, Howlback, Garboil, Overkill, Slugfest, Agent Smith, T-1000, Orion, Dumbledore, George Washington, Santa, Rudolph, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer

I'll note a couple pleasantries real quick. Believe it or not, but Chris actually played 9 more characters/groups than Josh. King Midget likes to make up height by making sure he assigns something to everyone and everyone to a vehicle so that the writer might just want to Jeffery Epstein themself after only typing the roster. Also, I get it, I was Chris 2.0 on the match, but it’s here now isn’t it. So just read, enjoy, and be happy I didn’t take till Christmas.

Act I: Fangorn Forest

The Midgets that approach are Yoda and He-Man atop of BattleCat, while the Elves are Gandalf the Grey, George Washington, and Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. He-Man looks upon the enemy and scoffs, “This is it? Three old white dudes, this will be easy.” Yoda Insists, “Underestimate them, you should not. Very powerful wizards, two of them are.” He-Man neglects what the ancient Jedi Master has said and charges full speed atop BattleCat to slice the old guys up like a Thanksgiving turkey and succeeds with the powerless slave owner, but Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore stuns He-Man with the Stupefying charm which Gives Gandalf time to ironically slice He-Man with Glamdring. BattleCat without a rider is then struck with the killing curse by Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. Yoda, now aware he cannot take on both power wizards due to the stupidity of his teammate, sits down to meditate. The wizards approach slowly, expecting a trap. As soon as Yoda senses them to be within range, he uses his power to allahu ackbar the White Lantern Ring, which kills himself and Gandalf, but Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore stands alive due to already putting up a Protego totalum spell before arriving to Yoda.

Act II: Sands of Arrakis

Count Dooku, Mother Talzin, Nightsister Spirit, Zombie Predator, and Achilles approach from the Midgets, while Sandworm #1-3, Black Lantern Sandworm, Vampire Sandworm, and Zombie Sandworm arrive for the newly freed slaves due to Washington’s death. I don’t really know how to break it to the Midgets, but c’mon, that’s a lot of sandworms. I’m sure y’all can take a couple down, but all of them…? Anyways, Zombie Predator takes the lead with Achilles and Nightsister Spirit close behind, and out of the sand comes Sandworm #1-2 Instantly devouring half of Nightsister Spirit to each Sandworm. Achilles takes a quick stab through Sandworm #1’s brain and Zombie Predator shoots an energy weapon down the throat of Sandworm #2. Black Lantern Sandworm and Vampire Sandworm arise and avenge their fallen brother Sandworms, each eating Zombie Predator and Achilles in one bite. Dooku charges but his form two dueling strategy is of no use against such beasts and is swallowed by Black Lantern Sandworm, but is not digested fast enough to stop him from igniting his lightsaber and tear the Sandworm up from the inside, which kills them both. Mother Talzin sees Zombie Sandworm approach, but she is gifted in the art of the dead and puts the Sandworm back in the grave it belongs. Vampire Sandworm and Sandworm #3 jump out of the sand towards Mother Talzin and Sandworm #3 is able to make a killing move, while the Vampire side of the other Sandworm takes effect as the sun is blazing causing Vampire Sandworm to burn to ash.

Act III: Mega City

For those unaware, Mega City is the city from the Matrix, not Zion the real life city, but the city inside the Matrix. I can’t not make this the setting when I’m gifted with Neo versus Agent Smith. It could be a hate crime if I didn’t properly respect the upcoming duel. Although some battle must occur before, such as Kobe’s helicopter crashing by itself killing Kobe and Vorian Atreides #riprapist. After that, the players in the city are Starscream, Black Lantern Magneto, Neo, Symbiote Suit Spider-Man, Nazghul #9 on Fell Beast, Conner in his over priced Mazda, and X-23 for the Midgets. The House Elves are Godzilla, Iron Man, Colossus, Agent Smith, T-1000, and the 16 transformers that you can look up in the roster cause I’m not rewriting them again. They all got smashed into a ball by Magneto anyways, sorry metal bots. Magneto also crushed Iron Man, Colossus, and T-1000 because they’re all made of metal. It’s not looking good for the Elves, but Godzilla swipes down Starscream and the Fell Beast like flies. As Godzilla tramps through the city, Conner zig zags in between the feet of the monster trying to find an attack point. He is driving quite successfully until he misshifts and stalls the car out, which leaves him unmoving for Godzilla to trample through. Symbiote Suit Spider-Man thinks of an idea he saw in this movie once and starts shooting webs around the legs of Godzilla until the beast falls over for X-23 to be standing in the wrong spot and is crushed, but not before her claws are out enough to slay the mighty Godzilla. Agent Smith took this time to sneak up to Magneto and Spider-man and morph them into himself. He is then able to have Neo just to himself, “It’s just you and me, Mr. Anderson. Now why don’t we make it fair and you give me one of those White Lightsabers.” Neo obliges and tosses a laser sword to the ground. Agent SMith makes the first swipe, but it’s of course deflected by Neo. They continue going blow for blow, each blocking every attack, the two being so evenly matched. They go hours of fighting without either of the two gaining on the other. Agent Smith stops for a second to speak, “We can’t go forever, Mr. Anders…” and before he can finish, Neo stabs him through the heart with his saber, catching Agent Smith off guard. Before the final breath leaves his mouth, Agent Smith, stabs Mr. Anderson back, and they die together in each other’s arms. Agent Smith’s death releases Magneto and Spider-Man from his grasp and are the two survivors in the city.

Act IV: Waters of Mon Cala

I can see neither teams respect the water aspect of the playoff planet, but that’s ok, I can force it a little bit. The Elves play a Seaworm, and The Midgets nothing, so I force the Master and Padawan duo Luminara Unduli and Barriss Offee into the depths of the sea. The two Jedi may have fancy water suits but are still vastly inferior in speed to the Seaworm. The Seaworm moves full speed towards the duo unaware of the Green and Blue Lantern Rings they possess, in which they use to grasp the Seaworm with claws they fabricated and drag it into their cool glowy sticks. 

Act V: Milky Way

For what the Midgets lack in water, they make up for in space with The MIllennium Falcon, Mando’s Ship, Omega Supreme, Deep Space Nine, Jedi Starfighter, Naboo Starfighter, and TIE Bomber. The House Elves bring Set, Luke’s Stealth X-Wing, Orion, and Superman. Set and Omega Supreme start into a huge battle. During the excitement, Luke’s Stealth X-Wing is able to land inside Deep Space Nine and mess up the whole crew single-handedly including the pilots, but is unable return to his ship in time before Deep Space Nine crashes into The TIE Bomber and Naboo Starfighter and all explodes into a fiery death. Two gods come from the Elves, one a new god and the other considered a god by the people of Earth. They Move towards Millennium Falcon, Mando’s ship, and Jedi Starfighter. The ships realize they cannot destroy Superman, so instead focus fire on Orion and are able to rip him to shreds with lasers before Superman smashes the ships like a trash compactor. While this all occurred, the battle between an immovable object and an unstoppable force ended in both retiring to death, leaving Superman as sole space survivor.

Act VI: Ozone Layer

The Midgets really like rings in this one with Atrocitus, Aga’po, Sinestro with both Yellow and Green Lantern Rings, Ganthet with a Dwarf Ring, and Sayd also with a Dwarf Ring. The emancipated people of Washington are Thor and Santa with crew. Santa looks upon his list and checks it twice, noticing Atrocitus to be on there Santa transforms Atrocitus into an ant and smushes him with his hand. Thor flies head on to Ganthet and Sayd and is able to conjure lightning to vaporize one and then smash the other with mighty Mjolnir. While Thor celebrates his victory, SInestro uses the power of the two lantern rings to create a canon to vaporize Thor from existence. Before Santa sees Sinestro move to the naighty list, Aga’po and Sinestro move quickly to combine their power and kill the deceptively powerful fat man and his special deer.

Act VII: The Final Countdown

Those remaining for the Midgets are Black Lantern Magneto, Symbiote Suit Spider-Man, Luminara Unduli w/ Green Lantern Ring, Barriss Offee w/ Blue Lantern Ring, Aga’po, and Sinestro w/ Green and Yellow Lantern rings. The Elves have Superman, Sandworm #3, and Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. Magneto moves to release rage upon the Sandworm and conjures up metal spikes and sends them soaring through the worm from all directions. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore comes to avenge and sends the Killing Curse towards Magneto but he dodges and the curse strikes Spider-Man in unlikely timing for the web slinging spider. Magneto retaliates by sending metal towards the old man, but Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore turns the incoming metal to sand, becoming harmless to him. Superman flys in on the distracted Magneto and heat visions through the metal bender’s skull. Although the Lantern and Sapphire Corps are separate, they come together in unison in order to try to take down the great wizard and daunting Superman. Sinestro, thinking he can do it alone, charges before the others in an attempt to feed off the two’s fear. By the time he realizes Superman and Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore contain zero fear in either of their bodies, it is already too late and Superman flies over and rips the two ring bearer in half. Whilst this occurs, Barriss and her master have been feeding their two Rings together enough to create a blast no spell can protect against and it obliterates Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. Even with the fact that it is a 3 vs 1, team Midgets know the fight is not over. Aga’po attempts to use the violet light of love to make Superman fall in love with her. His mind is strong and he tries to resist and starts to lash out, killing Aga’po instead of showing her the love she wanted, and then moves towards the Master and Padawan. Superman grabs hold of the Padawan and chokes her until life leaves her body. Master Luminara feared the death of her beloved Padawan, this led to anger, which led to hate for Superman, and hate to suffering. Luminara falls into the Dark Side at the sight of Barriss' death, becoming Darth Luminara. Having no longer to hold back to uphold Jedi ideals, Darth Luminara uses pure rage in a frenzy towards Superman, Superman unable to react in time catches a Lightsaber across the throat and is beheaded…

Week 2 Playoffs: The Striders of Rohan Vs. Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight

The Striders of Rohan are Visas Marr, Magneto, Wolverine (w/ a red lantern ring), Yondu in a TIE Silencer, Kraglin in Leia's Stealth X-Wing, E2 Batman, E2 Catwoman, Ragnarok, Ancalagon the Black, Gothmog the Barlrog, Batwing, Scorpion, Scorpion, Azula, Rage, The Leader, Nazgul #2 on Fell Beast, Gandalf the White (w/ The White Lantern Ring), Samwise Gamgee (w/ a blue lantern ring), The Gladiator, Mr. Incredible, Dash, Jack-Jack, Fro-Zone, Legolas of the Woodland Realm, Spoiler, Baron Mordo, Brother Blood, Liu Kang, The Comedian, The Blob, IG Bounty Hunter in a X-Wing, & Baron Zemo.

Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight are Darkseid, Dark Supergirl, Wonder Woman (w/ the Sword of Light), Wonder Girl, Aquaman, The Deputy Lanterns: Green Lantern Ganthet, Blue Lantern Flash, Orange Lantern Lex Luthor, Red Lantern Mera, Yellow Lantern Scarecrow, Indigo Lantern Ray Palmer, & Star Sapphire Wonder Woman, The Capt. Marvel Family: Shazam, Mary Marvel, Capt. Marvel Jr., Eugene Choi, Pedro Pena, Darla Dudley, & C.C. Batson, The Injustice League: Ultraman, Superwoman, Owl Man w/ Talon in a 1980 Mustang GT, Johnny Quick, & Power Ring, Emperor Joker, Capt. America (w/ a blue lantern ring), Axe Cop w/ Wexler, Ranx the Sentient City, General Zod, Ursa, Non, Honored Matre #1, & Giant Hammer Bros. #1 & 2.


On Day One of the long siege of this epic battle, The Hungry Dino-Mites received word that Ragnarok was coming. Emperor Joker, not realizing that Ragnarok was just the name of this dude dressed like Thor, became jealous and destroyed the majority of the Playoff Planet before anyone else could. What is left of the Playoff Planet is comparable to the aftermath of a #BLM Protest; but not the sugar-coated Livonia type, the kind that the news doesn't want to show you. That scorched remnant of the once great city is where this battle takes place.

Hell bent on the domination and destruction of the Playoff Planet, Emperor Joker caused the Planet to begin folding in on itself. Shrinking and shrinking until it will eventually only be big enough for him. Mix this with the gravitational pull of the shrinking planet sucking Ranx the Sentient City ever closer to the surface. Disaster is sure to take place. One of these teams desperately needs to win this match before both of them are destroyed along with the planet. For a short time the teams even considered working together to undo the work of the Joker. The Leader began to develop a plan; but all of the sudden developed a pair of demented smiley faces on his corpse. One on his mouth and one on his large brain. This eventually led to Darkseid murdering his own teammate Emperor Joker in an attempt to stop the madness from destroying their own team as well; but the damage could not be undone.

Owl Man and Talon are ripping up the already ripped up streets in their souped up 1980 Mustang when it comes to an abrupt halt. The Super Villains see a man with a red helmet standing before then who is effortlessly overriding the horsepower pumping through the car's motor. They reach for their utility belts; but before they can, Magneto uses his powers to lift the car into the air and crush Owlman and Talon inside.

The Blob stands strong as Ursa flies in fast and hits him with a building leveling punch. The Kryptonian seems shocked to see the seemingly out of shape mutant take a hit from her. She tries a few more times but is unsuccessful. Ursa then takes back to the air and sends as much heat vision as she can muster directly into the blob. When the flash of light subsides, only a burnt form remains where the Blob once was. As dead as the mutant is, at least he didn't move.

The Comedian was about to say something really funny, but before he could; General Zod smashed in his face.

Ultraman and Superwoman enter the scene with an arrogance that they have never had a problem backing up against their opponents. Superwoman takes flight at the sight of Gothmog; but fails to evade the sting of his fiery whip. He uses it to grab a hold of the evil version of Wonder Woman, who is unable to break free. He then uses his massive black axe to obliterate her. Ultraman starts flying around all ultra-like when Azula jumps in and starts firebending like cray-cray. And then some other stuff happened and Azula won the fight VERY EASILY. Now, I hope you are all paying attention, because Josh just had a Kryptonian lose to an Avatar character. So don't hate on my Anime knowledge.

Rage looked a lot tougher back when his head was still attached to his body, Axe Cop fixed that for him though.

Ragnarok's hammer may not be a true Asgardian fixture; but it did seem to work for caving in the skull of Wonder Girl.

There isn't much water left on the self-destructing Playoff Planet; so after Aquaman came to shore he met with Greta Thunberg to see what they could do about fixing the Changing Climate. “HOW DARE YOU EMPEROR JOKER” they proclaimed in unison. Greta spoke first to the teary eyed crowd; but when Aquaman took the stage, he was shot in the neck by an arrow from Legolas. As Legolas left to join the fight, the Social Justice Warriors took to Twitter to demand he be CANCELLED immediately. Luckily Elves don't have smart phones.

Speaking of woke culture, Batman and Catwoman of Earth 2 team up with Batwing; but Batwing and Catwoman all of the sudden decide that they can't handle taking orders from a white man. Batman goes off and disappears into obscurity a victim of his own depression and anxiety, while Catwoman and Batwing go get a house in the city and begin urban farming for an LGBTQ+ Collective Commune. They are unfortunately both killed later in a home invasion after the police were defunded.

Baron Mordo should have an edge over Non, due to the Kryptonian susceptibility to magic; but before we can see that play out, Non delivers a flying face kick to Baron Mordo that sends him back to Transylvania.

The Incredibles have certainly lost their friendly and playful edge after the atrocities they have witnessed during this last FFL Season. With the women folk from their team dead, Mr. Incredible and his team are Hellbent on having revenge and have taken to a fierce training regiment to insure it. As the Capt. Marvel family gets together to formulate a plan, they are hit by a sneak attack from the remaining Incredibles. Fro-Zone, Dash, and Jack-Jack savagely light up the room of Shazam sidekicks while even Shazam finds himself overpowered and strangled my Mr. Incredible.

Capt. America doesn't believe in using deadly force; but he makes an exception when he sees his old buddy Baron Zemo out of the corner of his eye. The only good Nazi is a dead Nazi Cap says to himself as he sends a well placed shield into the neck of Zemo.

Liu Kang has a good sparring match with the Honored Matre; but makes fairly short work of her. The two Scorpions (Marvel and Mortal Kombat) team up and deliver quite a sting to the much larger Giant Hammer Bros.

Wonder Woman and Wolverine are locked in an epic melee battle and have been for some time. We shall return to that later.

Magneto is one of my favorite characters of all time, and I really wanted him to blow up in this match; but I don't see any metal characters anywhere. So, instead he got his head punched off by Dark Supergirl.

Power Ring and Johnny Quick are the last two members of the Injustice League, but they too meet their demise at the hands of The Striders. Power Ring is taken off guard by the Force Powers of the blind; but very powerful Visas Marr, while Johnny Quick wasn't quite fast enough to get away from the large maw of Nazgul #2's Fell Beast.

The Striders may have taken out quite a few of the Dino-Mites heavy hitters already; but they know that they haven't really began a push if they can't take out Ranx: The Sentient City. The plan they had formulated to take out the planet moving towards the Playoff Planet involved Brother Blood, Azula, and Ragnarok doing what they could to weaken the most powerful of all the Yellow Lanterns while their space vehicles did the rest; but Ranx easily absorbed the attacks of the trio, sending that power back tenfold killing Blood, Ragnarok, and Azula with ease. Yondu now knows that this mission has been dropped upon him..... Yondu flies in the lead in his TIE Silencer with Kraglin and IG Bounty Hunter flanking him in standard attack pattern in their X-Wings. Their strafing runs are doing next to no damage; so they begin to execute one last ditch effort to give their team the chance they need to take it all the way to The Universe Bowl. IGBH locks on to the strongest power source within Ranx and takes one for the team by crashing his X-Wing into the exact location after arming all 4 advanced missiles and both Proton Torpedoes. Once the crash hit, IGBH activated his self-destruct mechanism for an extra bang. With this damaging diversion, Yondu and Kraglin fire everything their ships have and lock onto the source of Yondu's arrow which the blue pirate directs with his whistling into the heart of Ranx blowing him up from the inside.

Darkseid, despite all of his wisdom and power is beginning to grow nervous by the push of The Striders. He thought his opponent's team was weakened, he thought they were on their last leg. Little did he know that that last leg was so sturdy. As leader of the Dino-Mites, Darkseid has been trying to get the Deputy Lanterns to lead the charge against The Striders; but they refuse to work as a team and are not as impressive today as he had hoped. With these thoughts going through his head, Darkseid witnesses Gandalf: Empowered by his unified lantern power in the White Ring strike down Yellow Lantern Scarecrow. As the ring leaves the body of Scarecrow and begins to search out its next wielder, Darkseid snatches the ring out of the air and puts it on his own finger. Darkseid uses the ring to communicate to the other Lanterns telling them he has come up with an excellent plan to unify their powers and win the battle. The Lanterns all meet with him in a safe position in what was once the desert and await the plan. Darkseid walks up slowly and peacefully, with his hench(wo)man Dark Supergirl at his side. He then apologizes for their own inability to unite and for he, finding out how easy it was via Emperor Joker to kill his own teammates when they got in the way. With these final words, Darkseid hits the Deputy Lanterns with a continuous stream of Omega Beam killing them all. Darkseid and Dark Supergirl then quickly collect the rings before they can fly away and Darkseid greedily puts them all on his right hand forming a giant glove of pure energy (kind of like a Gauntlet.... (What?!!? (I just thought DC should copy off Marvel for once))).

General Zod, unaware of Darkseid's plan is wondering what is becoming of his team. But this does not stop he and Ursa from flying in fast and taking Yondu and Kraglin out of the sky by rocketing through their respective ships after they reentered the Playoff Planet atmosphere fresh off their victory over Ranx. From their the two Kryptonians attempt to aid Wonder Woman who has had her pitched battle against Wolverine disrupted by Visas Marr who has recently joined the fight on Wolverine's side. Ursa first has her heat vision blocked by the lightsaber of Visas, but is then destroyed by the freeze breath of Zod. Wolverine is then triple teamed by three extremely strong fighters in Wonder Woman, Ursa, and Zod but they find themselves amazed at how difficult he is to kill. Wolverine's berserker rage is fueled by his red ring as he sticks his left claws into the chest of Ursa and is able to use the right to slice through her neck despite the hardened Kryptonian skin. Ursa falls; but Zod and Wonder Woman find a way to get past his healing factor as they manage to each grab a hold of Wolverine and pull until he is ripped in half at the torso. They then throw his pieces to opposite sides of the continent.

Nazgul #2 is flying through the air atop his Fell Beast when they are surprise attacked by a flying T-Rex and a lunatic on top of it. Axe Cop leaps off the top of Wexler and chops the head off of the Fell Beast, while Wexler bites the Nazgul in half. Wexler then catches Axe Cop before he hits the ground.

Cap and The Gladiator square off in an incredible battle of melee combat, but the Gladiator is never able to land a sword blow on Cap. The Gladiator, thinking that Cap had thrown away his only defense had his sword knocked from his hand when Cap's shield made the return trip to its owner's hand. Cap was then able to knock him to the ground and put a leglock on his neck to finish him off. Cap stands up to see a frightened Samwise Gamgee ready to fight with his dagger in one hand and cast iron pot in the other. The two blue lanterns nod as they begin to do battle. “You are noble indeed little one; but I do not think you have the skill to defeat me”.

Sam retorts: “I never thought I could beat you Cap. I was just hoping I could”....

With those words, the two blue rings send a light so bright that it blinds Cap for a fraction of a second. When Cap regains his vision he sees Sam's dagger enter his chest.

The newly empowered Darkseid and Dark Supergirl finally rejoin the scene and immediately begin going on a killing spree. Many Striders start rallying to the cause thinking with a decent sized teamup they can take this duo out before they turn the tides of the match, but not quite enough Striders take up the call. In a whirlwind of energy projection and earth-shattering punches, Darkseid and Dark Supergirl finish off Mr. Incredible, Jack-Jack, Fro-Zone, and Dash before making short work of Spoiler, Liu Kang, and the two Scorpions. Even Samwise the brave enters the battle, but much to his dismay inadvertently charges Darkseid's green ring and suffers a massive energy blast from The Ruler of Apokolips.

As the teams begin to dwindle, the remnants of the two squads meet in the desert wasteland that is basically all that remains of the self-destructing Playoff Planet.

Ancalagon the Black swoops in from on high; but is met by Non who has no fear of the beast. The lobotomized Kyrptonian powers through the attacks of the dragon and stuns it with a wicked punch to the face. Then, with strength second only to Superman himself, Non rips the head of the dragon clean off and drops it to the ground.

Gandalf the White squares off against Zod and Wonder Woman, while the unlikely ally of the White Lantern Wizard Gothmog is taking on both Dark Supergirl and her hyper-powered liege Darkseid. Axe Cop attempts to enter the battle via the air; but Legolas takes out his flying steed with a perfectly placed arrow into the mouth of Wexler.

Zod flies in fast towards Gandalf to open the attack; but all stand back in awe as the Kryptonian General is knocked back by the magical powers of The White Lantern Wizard. Gandalf then unsheathes Glamdring which has taken on such a bright white hue that it resembles a white lightsaber and uses it to cut General Zod in half at the torso. The Balrog General Gothmog, who stood at equal rank of Sauron the Deceiver in the Evil Army of Morgoth fiercely takes on both Darkseid and Dark Supergirl. It takes every possible power in their large repertoire for the residents of Apokolips to finish off the builder of the Empire of Mordor.

Legolas stands behind Gandalf, ready to fight; as Darkseid, Dark Supergirl, and Non join the fight already in progress. Gandalf sends a massive blast of power towards Dark Supergirl, taking advantage of the evil she has let creep into her soul and obliterates the cousin of Kal El. Darkseid chuckles at the death of his own partner and says: “That will not work on me bearded one. I am no Kryptonian. I have no such susceptibility to magic, and like you: I also wield the power of the full spectrum”.

Gandalf looks to Darkseid and says: “You were never meant to wield that power, agent of evil. And it will not work as your ally”.

The two clash in an epic battle causing blinding blasts of light to illuminate the darkened, dwindling sky. Darkseid knocks Gandalf to the ground, sending Glamdring flying from his hands and then hits The White Lantern Wizard with a volley of multi-colored power attached to his Omega Beams. A massive blast is heard and Darkseid looks to the foreground to see a massive crater before him where Gandalf once was. As the smoke clears from the crater, Darkseid is shocked to see Gandalf still standing at the bottom of it. Gandalf is glowing in a multi-colored rainbow of brightness as he grabs hold of his staff. The colors dissipate and return to pure white causing Gandalf to say: “I did not take these powers for selfish use, these powers chose me”. A blast of White energy then rockets from the staff of Gandalf leaving nothing but dust in place of Darkseid.

Such a show of force, has left Gandalf weakened; as he turns to his left to see Wonder Woman rushing towards him. The time has finally run out for the champion of The Striders as Wonder Woman stuns the Wizard by using The Sword of Light to cast Bolt 2 and attacks with it proper to run him through.

“NOOOOOOOO” is heard from the befuddled Legolas who has just witnessed shows of power that he still cannot believe. Legolas quickly avenges his friend and hits Wonder Woman with a flurry of slices from his Elven Short Swords.

Legolas, the last remaining Strider of Rohan squares off against the sophomoric, but brutally powerful Non and speaks to the Kryptonian. “Your power may exceed my own, but I stand ready to fight you. I may not wield the magic that is required to hurt you, but it flows through my Elven blood. I stand ready vile one, let us do battle”.

With these noble words still floating in the air, Legolas begins to move towards Non in attack, when he turns to a noise from behind him. “I WILL CHOP YOUR HEAD OFF”!! Is heard by the Elf, right before Axe Cop makes this act come to fruition.

FFL Playoffs Week 1

FFL Playoffs: Assassins Vs Striders

Assassin’s: Ras Al Ghul, Zombie Dr. Manhattan, Zombie 13, Zombie 14, Black Lantern Neo, Batzarro, Lady Deadpool, Kid Deadpool, Dog pool, Head Pool, Quicksilver, Vampire Dr. Manhattan, Witch-King on Witch Kings Fell Beast, Grandmaster Luke Skywalker, (Legends) Leia Organa, Havok, Freddy Krueger, Dromammu, The Monitor, The Ancient One, Poseidon.

Striders: Batman (Dick Grayson) and Robin (Damien Wayne), Apocalypse, Azula, Vampire Neo, Batwing, The Incredibles, Black Flash, Odin w/White Lantern Ring, Gandalf the White w/White Lantern Ring, Pippin, Supreme Leader Snoke, Ancalagon the Black, Mewtwo, Magneto, Wolverine/w Red Lantern Ring, Ragnarök, Balrog of Moria, Gothmog the Balrog, T-2, T-3.

Both Teams meet at sunrise for battle. Batman and Robin immediately move to take out Ras Al Ghul, who runs to separate the heroes from their allies. Neo from each team along with Batwing and Batzarro begin a pursuit into the City after them. Within the shadows, both parties begin exchanging attacks. With a swift move, Ras kills Batman, but before he realizes it Robin has him and he dies. Nearby Vampire Neo and Black Lantern Neo are in an intense martial arts battle, but neither can land a hit, but Black Lantern Neo has Vampire Neo on the back step. Before he knows it, Vampire Neo is exposed to sunlight weakening him enough for Black Lantern Neo to finish the fight. Batwing and Batzarro begin exchanging blows next, but Batzarro takes an unexpected bite from the neck of Batwing rendering him the victor. All survivors retreat to their team camps to recover.

In a different part of the city The Incredibles and the Pools stand ready to fight. Unfortunately for Pixar, this one was rated R. Dogpool and Headpool tear up Dash and Jack-Jack before Violet catches them in a force field and crushes them. Lady Deadpool and Kid Deadpool slice up Mr. Incredible and Frozone, but Elastigirl collapses an overhang on them, crushing them to death. Black Flash and Quicksilver are “seen” in a race around the city, but before long Black Flash catches Quicksilver and drags him to the afterlife. Magneto and Wolverine come under a blast from Havok, but Magneto uses his powers to throw Wolverine into him, who then shreds the mutant Havok. 

Freddy Krueger is then manipulated by Magneto into stabbing himself, killing the nightmare.

In the sky near the city Ragnarök and Dormammu meets for battle. The cyborg begins to absorb the nearby energy with his hammer and uses it to empower his attacks. Dormammu teleports his hammer away from him and sends it flying into him destroying the cyborg.

Apocalypse and Azula team up to take on Zombie Dr. Manhattan in the forest, who gets back up from Zombie 13 and 14. Azula begins to create large fires in an attempt to slow the Dr. down, who appears to quickly catch fire, though it seems to be ineffective. Mid pursuit Dr. Manhattan turns around to catch the fire bender off guard and lands a decisive blow killing her, but Apocalypse is waiting nearby and now he has his chance. He begins to manipulate the area surrounding the zombie, but it begins to come apparent that he will survive the attack if its to small. Sacrificing himself he breaks down every molecule around them, including Zombie 13 and Zombie 14. Odin with his White Lantern Ring decides he should be the one to take down Vampire Dr. Manhattan. Though he soon finds himself on his back foot and decides it would be better to die killing the enemy then to allow him to live. Soon a white flash is seen destroying the rest of the forest sending flaming debris in all directions.

Near the seas, Poseidon emerges in a humanoid form. He uses the water around him to protect himself and with a Trident in hand, he is prepared for the incoming T-2 and T-3. The attacks start coming and they don’t stop coming. Both terminators are in deep sync, but the water is excellent at absorbing their attacks. T-2 begins a heavy barrage while T-3 inches forward and begins a self-destruct sequence that blows away all the water, Allowing T-2 to blow away Poseidon with his shotgun. Luke and Leia stand to fight Snoke, Ancalagon the Black, and Mewtwo. The two Jedi force pull the dragon down from the skies injuring him gravely, but Snoke force pushes Leia close enough though that she is eaten by Ancalagon shortly before he succumbs to his wounds. Channeling his anger with the force, Luke cuts down Mewtwo before overpowering Snoke in lightsaber combat.

Both Balrogs decide that they are best fighting in the desert to avoid any unwanted cooling. But the Monitor and The Ancient One know that the longer the Balrogs have the harder they will be to take down. Trapping them in the mirror dimension The Assassins move in to kill the beasts. Durin’s Bane uses his whip to immobilize The Monitor, giving Gothmog enough time to slice him in half. With no ally to receive friendly fire the Ancient One collapses the mirrors and leaves the Balrogs to wander this dimension for eternity.

Gandalf and Pippin also track the Witch King to the desert where he awaits them on his fell beast. The Hobbit is gobbled by the Fell Beast, which allows Gandalf to kill the beast, without his fell beast the Witch King stands no chance against Gandalf, even without the ring.

The final battle between the survivors takes place back within the city. Robin, Elastigirl, Violet, Black Flash, Magneto, Wolverine, and T-2 are the last Striders of Rohan while Ahsoka’s Acrobatic Assassins stand Black Lantern Neo, Batzarro, Grand Master Luke, Dormammu, and The Ancient One. Robin, Elastigirl, Violet and Black Flash skirmish with Batzarro, The Ancient One, and Black Lantern Neo. While the Striders kill Batzarro and Neo, they ultimately lose the fight against the Ancient One. Magneto, Wolverine and T-2 undertake the great task of killing Dormammu. While T-2 and Magneto is killed, Wolverine’s rage keeps him alive and he shreds Dormammu’s physical form, returning him back to wander dimensions. Gandalf shows Luke what a true Grand Wizard is capable of with the power of the White Lantern Ring, blowing him and half a city block into oblivion. Still full of rage Wolverine launches himself at the Ancient One impaling the sorcerer, but when he looks down he sees a glass blade lodged within his abdomen, both succumb to their wounds shortly thereafter.

With most of the terrain destroyed, Gandalf retires to the beach and watches the sunset on this ruthless day of battle.

FFL National League Playoffs Week 1

Gender Neutral Misunderstood Little People: Yoda w/ White Lantern Ring and 5th Ring of the Dwarf Lords (4 deaths), Black Lantern Emperor Palpatine (4 deaths), Mr. Mxyzptlk (4 deaths), Lando Calrissean (pilot), Nien Numb (co-pilot), Lobot (front gunner), and ALF (rear gunner) in The Outlaw, The Mandalorian, The Child w/ a Blue Lantern Ring, and Quill in The Mandalorian’s Ship, Asajj Ventress (4 deaths) and Nightsister Acolyte (4 deaths) in Wedge’s Snowspeeder, Omega Supreme, Starscream w/ Orange Lantern Ring, Vampire Green Lantern (4 deaths), Atrocitus (4 deaths), Indigo-1 (4 deaths) and Munk (4 deaths), Neo w/ 2 White Lightsabers, Queen Aga'po, Count Dooku w/ a Yellow Lantern Ring, FA-4 in a TIE Bomber, Nazgul #9 on his Fell Beast, Super Saiyan Conner Weidman w/ a Blue Lantern Ring in his Mazda RX-8, Symbiote Suit Spider-Man, Kobe Bryant on Mordor Horse #9 (4 deaths), Achilles, Black Lantern Magneto, Star Destroyer with James Madison w/ a Speed Ring, James Monroe w/ The Darksaber, Tyrion Lannister w/ 1st Ring of the Dwarf Lords, commanding and Star Fox w/ a Blue Lightsaber, Peppy Hare, Slippy Toad, and Falco piloting (Arwings on stand by if needed), Harambe w/ Starman, X-23, and Black Dragon #2

Barkley’s Turrible Decisions: Batman (4 deaths), Robin, and Alfred w/ Green Lightsaber in Modern Age Batmobile, Deadpool, Boba Fett (4 deaths), Snaptrap, Nautilator, Overbite, Seawing, Skalor, and Tentakill, Black Manta, Star Sapphire (4 deaths), Guy Gardner, Alan Scott, Killer Croc, Yaddle, Tom Bombadil, Ki Adi Mundi, Jade, Space Ghost in the Phantom Cruiser, Jan, Jace and Blip in Jan and Jace’s Shuttle, Cyborg (4 deaths), Kilowog, Shrek and Donkey, Nightcrawler, Artemis, Pan, Mega Man X (4 deaths), and Mike Tyson

In the Skies: Little People have Mando’s Ship, The Outlaw, Wedge’s Snowspeeder, Starscream in ship form, FA-4 in TIE Bomber and the Star Destroyer.

Barkley has Space Ghost in his Phantom Cruiser, Jan Jace and Blip in their ship, and Star Sapphire

The Star Destroyer starts out by shooting a flurry of shots at the Phantom Cruiser and Jan and Jace’s ship. Space ghost easily dodges all these shots but Jan and jace do not as their ship explodes. Asajj and Nightsister Acolyte use their cable on the snowspeeder to wrap up Star Sapphire but she uses her Sapphire Gem to burn through the cable with ease, she then shoots an energy beam from her ring at the TIE bomber and destroys it. The Outlaw and The Mandalorian team up to try and take out Space Ghost though they have trouble as Space Ghost is a very quick opponent. They eventually do get his ship but Space Ghost survives the death of his ship and uses his power bands to freeze The Mandalorian’s ship but while he’s doing that Lobot hits him with a few good shots from The Outlaw and kills him. Though The Outlaw was too late as The Mando’s ship is too frozen to keep flight and it falls to its death on the Playoff Planet. 

Starscream and Star Sapphire then get into a dogfight with their rings but Star Sapphire is the much more experienced power ring user and defeats Starscream. At this point Star Sapphire has had a huge boost to her ego and decides that she is going to use her Star Sapphire Gem to destroy the Star Destroyer. She uses all her might to create the biggest energy beam a Sapphire Gem user has ever made and shoots it at the destroyer. It critically damages the ship and it begins to nose dive towards the planet. After this energy beam Star Sapphire is extremely tired and weakened, heavily breathing and barely able to sustain her flight with the Gem. As she begins to try and regain her strength she is then  kamikazeed by Asajj Ventress and Nightsister Acolyte in the Wedge’s Snowspeeder. 

The Outlaw survives in the skies. 

In the Forest: Little People have Count Dooku w/ Yellow Lantern Ring, Kobe Bryant on Mordor Horse, Achilles, and Harambe w/ Starman.

The Terrible Decisions have Tom Bombadil, Ki Adi Mundi, Shrek and Donkey, Pan and Yaddle.

Yaddle and Dooku begin to duel as Dooku wants to see if he can defeat Yaddle without the powers of his Yellow Lantern Ring. Harambe sees Shrek and Donkey across the forest and decides to activate the Starman, he begins to charge towards them. As he’s charging towards them Kobe Bryant and his Horse get in the way and Harambe charges right through with ease because of the Starman. This knocks Kobe off the horse and he tears his achilles tendon, thus incapacitatin him for the rest of the battle. Shrek then just barely dodges the charge from Harambe but he does hit Donkey and kills him. The Starman effects do wear off after that though. Shrek and Harambe then have a battle of just brute strength, eventually Shrek does defeat Harambe as he was the superior fighter. 

Dooku is still battling Yaddle and he’s becoming annoyed that they’re still battling so he just kills her with an energy blast with his Lantern Ring. Achilles then hops on Kobe’s Mordor Horse and charges at Ki Adi Mundi. Count Dooku warns Achilles that Ki Adi is a skilled Jedi and that he should not pursue him one-on-one, he ignores this and charges anyways. Achilles then throws a spear at Ki Adi Mundi but the jedi easily splits it in half with his lightsaber, but while he’s splitting the spear Achilles stabs Ki Adi Mundi with his sword. Achilles then says to Dooku “This is why no one will remember your name”. Achilles sees Pan and decides to attack him. He charges at Pan but Pan easily knocks Achilles off his horse and then Pan runs up and stomps on Achilles heel with his hoof and kills him. Shrek then tries to attack Dooku but Dooku easily defeats him by shooting him with a blast of force lightning and then cuts off the ogre's head. Pan then charges at Dooku horns first but Dooku easily dodges the attack like a Matador in a bullfight. As he dodged the Satyr he cut off his head with his lightsaber.

All while this has been happening Tom Bombadil has just been dancing and singing in the Forest. He has not noticed that these battles have been going on because he does not care about things that mortal people do. Dooku notices Bombadil singing and decides to wrap him up with a lasso using his Yellow Lantern Ring. This annoys Bombadil so he sings a song which controls the trees in the forest. They wrap their limbs around Dooku and  eventually suffocate him to death. 

Tom Bombadil then joins the rest of his team.

In the Water: Little People have no on.

Barkley has Black Manta.

Black Manta realizes he’s in the sea by himself so he just goes and joins with the rest of his team. 

In the City: Everybody else on both teams is in the city.

Snaptrap, Nautilatior, Overbite, Seawing, Skalor and Tentakill see how big this battle is going to be so they combine and transform into the Piranacon. They go to take on Omega Supreme but just as they are about to attack the giant transformer Magneto uses his powers to freeze Piranacon in place while Omega Supreme hits them with a rocket and kills them all. 

Deadpool sees Super Saiyan Conner in his red Mazda RX-8 and decides to mess with him. He jumps about 300 ft in front of Conner’s speeding car, he tries to break but because his car is a piece of shit the breaks go out on it and runs right into Deadpool. Deadpool, being able to heal so quickly, recovers and is pissed off at Conner so he shoots him in the head with his Desert Eagle. While this is happening Boba Fett hits Nazgul #9 with a blaster fire that sets him on fire and kills him and kills him. The Outlaw then heads close to the ground to send a volley of shots at the enemy, the volley doesn’t hurt anyone but it does break two of the tires on the Modern Batmobile causing Batman, Robin and Alfred to do the rest of the battle on foot. While The Outlaw was doing a volley Boba Fett hit The Outlaw with a rocket causing the ship to lose control and crash into a skyscraper killing all on the ship. Magneto sees Boba Fett wreaking havoc so he crushes Boba Fett by squeezing his Mandalorian armor together and killing the bounty hunter.

Guy Gardner, Alan Scott, Jade and Kilowog combine all their green lantern energy blasts together to create one huge energy blast to destroy Omega Supreme. Vampire Green Lantern, Indigo-1, Munk and Queen Aga’po work together to take on the 4 members of the green lantern corps. After a huge battle between different spectrums of the lantern corps all that’s left standing is Indigo-1.

Symbiote Suit Spiderman comes swinging in and picks up Mike Tyson and drops him from a height unable to be survived by a human body. Mega Man X then shoots a couple of blasts at Spiderman but he dodges them and Neo flies by and cuts Mega Man X in half with his white lightsaber.

Symbiote Spiderman and Deadpool begin to fight and after a long battle where Deadpool kept dying but kept coming back to life. Eventually Deadpool tired Spiderman so much that he was able to kill him. After Deadpool kills Symbiote Suit Spiderman Neo just flies inside Deadpool and blows him up into pieces and thus removing him from The Matrix. 

Black Manta and Cyborg team up to attack Neo where Black Manta shoots his powerful optic blasts and Cyborg shoots his blasts from his robotic arm, but Neo uses his understanding of The Matrix to freeze these blasts in mid air and begins the offensive on the two enemies. After a long hand to hand combat battle Neo eventually kills Black Manta with one of his lightsabers but is slain by Cyborg while doing so.

Artemis uses her perfect aim with a bow and arrow to hit X-23 with an arrow but all this does is just enrage X-23 as she runs towards the goddess and dodges all of her shots with the bow and arrow before eventually ripping out the arrow that she was originally shot with and stabbing Artemis in the neck with the arrow. Cyborg sees that the goddess is slain and shoots X-23 with extremely powerful blasts from his robotic arm and blows X-23 into a million pieces.

Magneto sees that Cyborg is part robotic and just smirks as he uses Cyborg’s robotic arm to stab right through his chest thus killing him. Indigo-1 and Magneto team up to attack Batman, Robin and Alfred. While they're busy in battle Nightcrawler teleports Killer Croc behind Indigo-1 and Magento. Killer Croc rips Magneto’s head off of his body and begins to fight Indigo-1, while she is busy with Killer Croc, Alfred stabs her in the back with his green lightsaber.

All that’s left standing is Yoda, Emperor Palpatine, Black Dragon #2 and Mr. Mxyzptlk versus Batman, Robin, Alfred, Killer Croc, Nightcrawler and Tom Bombadil has finally just strolled in from his battle in the forest.

Palpatine begins by shooting electricity at Alfred thus killing him as his old heart cannot withstand that much amperage through his body. Mr. Mxyzptlk sees Nightcrawler being able to teleport so he decides to show off and teleports Nightcrawler into the center of the sun instantly vaporizing him. Mr.Mxyzptlk sees Tom Bombadil singing minding his own business and this interests him so he joins him and starts singing along. He gets so enthralled in the song that he doesn’t even realize that Tom Bombadil got him to sing his name backwards, thus making Mr. Mxyzptlk vanish.

Yoda and Emperor Palpatine then begin to fight against Killer Croc, Batman and Robin. Emperor Palpatine hits with a blast of electricity but it doesn’t do much to the thick skinned beast. While the Emperor is doing this Batman throws multiple explosive batarangs that stuck into the Emperor and kills him. 

Yoda sees that he can not take on Batman, Robin, Tom Bombadil and Killer Croc so he tells Black Dragon #2 to fly away. As the Dragon flies away he turns around to see what has happened and all he sees is a bright white explosion.