Thursday, April 17, 2014

A Rendezvous at the Pub

Ronan the Accusser, Dave Thomas, Mon Mothma, Balder the Brave, Darth Binks and Mansquito are fighting for the Rights of the People.

Vampire Chris and Julie Artrip, Andre the Giant, Hans Gruber, Ras Al Ghul and Bill Braskey are fighting for the continued Tyranny of the Watchers.

All six teams members are standing around in a local bar. There are probably twenty or thirty citizens of the playoff planet in the bar, making this place a packed house. Some are eating, most are drinking and like everywhere else on this planet, there is a sense of civil unease throughout the entire place.

Andre the Giant: That hurts mister bug man, please stop doing that.

Mansquito: Psssh Psssh (Bug Noises)

Vamp Chris: Come on, just a little bit more Dave.

Dave Thomas: Okay but remember that I ain't no Mo.

Chris proceeds to drink blood out of Dave Thomas' wrist.

Vamp Julie: Bulls#$% Chris, that blood is mine.

Julie tackles Chris to the ground as they pound on each other. Then the fighting starts to go in another direction to which this watcher had to turn his head. Given, they were still pounding on each other, only this time it was for a different outcome.

Darth Binks: Mesa lovin it when you shoot the coke head in the face. Mesa really liken it when yousa shootin the Japanese man in the head. Mesa lovin bein a Sith Lord.

Hans Gruber: I wish I shared the same sentiment as you but I happen to of found you as unappealing of a character as I have ever seen.

Darth Binks draws his light saber and swings it within an inch of Hans head.

Darth Binks: (In a eloquent tone of voice) If you were another man Mr. Gruber I would have let the blade slice you like buttered lamb at Easter dinner. Be grateful that my respect for you is just enough for me to hold back. Do not let it happen again or Mesa gonna have to cut your Mother F#$@ing dome off next time.

Balder the Brave: Can you believe the wonderful accommodations they have for us on this planet? I have been drinking like a king since we arrived.

Bill Braskey: I'm Bill Braskey.

Balder the Brave: Well Bill, it is nice to make your acquaintance. Here, let's have a drink.
A toast my friend to the wonderful people of this glorious Playoff Planet. May the people of this world be forever blessed with supple meats and plentiful drinks.

Both of them drink to the people of the Playoff planet

Ras Al Ghul: That is quite enough Mr. Braskey.

Bill Braskey: Enough of what? There are free drinks Ras, that means I am not budging.

Ras Al Ghul: Andre, would you please convince Mr. Braskey that it is for his own good to leave the company of such a barbarian.

Andre the Giant begins to walk over to Bill but as he does, Balder stands directly in front of him.

Balder the Brave: You say Barbarian but I assume you mean half brother of the God of Thunder. If I am a barbarian then you are a mere termite to be crushed under the foot of an innocent child. You are but another arrogant yet inconsequential creature that strives for something more but will never find a single moment good enough to fill the void. I pity you Ras Al Ghul. I feel sorry for your kind.

Ras Al Ghul: A speech to be remembered forever I am sure. Now Andre would you please get Mr. Braskey and leave these foolish creatures.

Andre is now drinking with Bill Braskey.

Andre: They have ale Ras Al. I will never be one to turn down free ale. Are you sure these people are the true enemies of this league? They seem like good people to me.

Ras Al Ghul: They do my large friend, don't they. Well then let me ask you this; If they are so great then why are they openly firing on any and all combatants in this match? They hold no allegiance towards you or anyone on your team so why defend them?

Mon Mothma: They are firing on us because we show them not even the slightest bit of decency when we ravage their home every single year. They did not ask to be in this situation, just like us. You say they are firing on each and every one of us; How does that make them any different then you or I? We were all brought into this league against our will and though many of us have embraced the situation, it will never be anything less then the will of the people being raped into submission. (Now talking to everyone in the bar) So I beg of you, citizens of this planet, this league: Please stand up to the Watchers once and for all and end this pointless genocide before we, like the people of this planet, are nothing but a distant memory. Save the Playoff Planet and maybe, just maybe you can save your soul.

Ras Al Ghul: (Claps ever so loud) Wonderful words Mon, quite the speaker are you. Every cause needs its mouthpiece and it looks like the fortunate people of this planet have you. Honestly, I mean that from the bottom of my heart. The thing you forget to put in this unequal equation you bring up is where we all fit in. You see; if it were not for the Watchers, none of this, us, would be here in the first place. We may not have asked to be put in this situation to begin with but what creature that has ever lived a life ever has? I understand where your point lies in this fight Mon, I just do not understand why? I was given life and I will fight for that life everyday until my last. All of you can choose to fight the system, I will no longer stand in your way but please ask yourself this one question before you do; If you are nothing but a pawn in the Watchers fantasy playground to begin with, then how can your "free will" be anything but a figment of their imagination?

A loud roaring laugh and loud clapping comes from the corner of the bar, the last seat next to the wall to be exact. Ronan the Accuser sits with the smile on his face, though the smile is not that of happiness, it is something completely different. Resignation perhaps, from this vantage point it is difficult to tell.

Mon Mothma: Why must you mock us Ronan? Why do you find it so difficult to choose a side in all of this?

Ronan the Accuser: You take my laughter the wrong way my dear Mon. I very much enjoyed this little show you both have put on for the good people of this establishment. The best piece of community theatre I have seen in quite some time.

Ras Al Ghul: Ah yes, Ronan the Accuser, I should have assumed you would wait until all the cards were on the table before you made your appearance known. All of you quote un-quote All Powerful Beings are all the same. You try and act like you can relate with the plights of us mortal beings, all the while knowing full well that you do not have to deal with any of the actual problems. Please Ronan, spar us your wisdom.

Ronan the Accuser: For somebody who supports the Watchers so loyally your defiance towards me is surprising. Unless of course it is something so simple as jealousy that clouds your mind? Not for somebody like you though, correct?

Ras Al Ghul makes not a single move towards the Kree soldier despite his obvious anger for him.

Ronan the Accuser: That is what I figured Ras Al. You see, everyone here in this bar right now, please listen; This shall only take a minute.

Everyone quiets down as Ronan takes center stage.

Ronan the Accuser: The issue on this planet is a dire one. Your home is being ravaged to pieces and you believe nobody is out there to help you. The truth, unfortunate as it may be. I know there are a lot of people out here right now fighting in opposition of this opinion but at the end of the day, it will all be for naught.

Boos and screams are heard around the bar and if looks could kill, Mon Mothma would be considered a mass murderer at this moment.

Balder the Brave: So your point is that fighting is useless no matter the cause?

Ronan the Accuser: In a way, yes, just not in the way that you think. My point is this. Most of you believe that fighting the Watcher's will help save your planet. This is a fruitless venture, but so is defending the Watcher's honor. The Watcher's may have created all of this...

Mon Mothma: May have?

Ronan the Accuser: Yes, they may have created us, not that it matters because regardless of the side you sit on, in the end, none of this matters anyways. You are all going to die fighting regardless of what your cause is, so when it truly comes down to it, whether you are with them or against them, it doesn't really matter. "Why fight at all" should be what you are all thinking right now instead of "Who" should you fight.

Ras Al Ghul: We are all going to die so what is the point of any of this? That is your big speech. You think we should all just put down our weapons and wait for the rapture? Why fight when the end is death anyways. (Screams this) You hear that everyone, we are all going to die anyways so let's just sit down and quit.

Ronan the Accuser: Very close Ras though I didn't say we were all going to die, I said you were all going to die.

Ras Al Ghul: Always twisting the words of those who are inferior to you huh Ronan?

Ronan the Accuser: Interesting words from someone who has been cheating death for years, though for today, I think you can make an exception.

Ras Al Ghul then looks around him and notices that everyone in the bar is either sleeping in their seat or on the floor. Ras himself then begins to feel lightheaded and takes a seat. The feeling of exhaustion is overwhelming and in a matter of seconds he wants nothing more then to put his head down and go to sleep.

Ras Al Ghul: (Fighting to get the words out) It was just one big trick wasn't it Ro? One last....you always have to win....don't you.

Ronan the Accuser: I wasn't tricking you my friend, I was showing you the truth.

As Ras Al Ghul finally loses the battle and closes his eyes, Ronan the Accuser alters the molecular structure in the room just enough to end every single person's life without causing them a single ounce of pain.

He then slowly walks out of the bar and heads towards the next battle on this embittered planet. A planet that if it were up to him, would be set free from all of this once and for all.

4 comments:

Solobeck said...

NAICE!!!

NFG Mike said...

Damn son!

Artifact said...

Nice dude. I liked the part where I got some.

Josh the Commish said...

This was Nick's part, if you couldn't tell by the style.