TEAM Vs. The Doctor's Madhouse

 TEAM is Unicron, Primus, Ego, Set, God Emperor Leto II, Thanos, Maw, Blitzwing, Astrotrain, Mace Windu, Thor, Achilles, Myrmidon #1 (w/ a short sword), Myrmidon #2-5, Thunderstrike, The GAang:  Katara, Sokka, Toph, Appa, & Momo, Godzilla, Yakub in Conner's Mazda, Dapper Man in a Lamborghini Jalpa, Zachary Houslander (w/ an aluminum baseball bat) in Ed's Plymouth Sundance, Arc Trooper Zachary Houslander in a Lamborghini Huracan, Soundwave w/ Rumble, Frenzy, Ravage, Lazerbeak, Buzzsaw, Ratbat, Overkill, Slugfest, Squawktalk, Beastbox, Garboil, Howlback, Glit, Enemy, Decepticon Cassette #1-5, & Transformer Cassette #1-5, Lightning Lad, Kryptonian #1A, Yellow Lantern #2, Phibian #1-10, & Jack Lalane on a Jetski.  

The Doctor's Madhouse is Darth Vader in  a TIE Dagger, Clone Trooper #1-2 in a Bespin Cloud Car, Batman (w/ a Kryptonite Suit) in The Tumbler, Robin (Damien Wayne) on The R-Cycle, Alfred Pennyworth in a F-15, Blade in The O.G. Batmobile, Dr. Manhattan, Silver Surfer, Ursa, Black Adam w/ Osiris & Isis, Ranx The Sentient City, Scarecrow (w/ a Yellow Lantern Ring), Voldemort (w/ a Yellow Lantern Ring), Brainiac, The Beyonder, Blue Marvel, Kid Flash, Captain Atom, Kwiastz Haderach Duncan Idaho, Saruman the White, Ocean Master, Swamp Thing, Seaworm #8-9, Invincible (Mark Grayson), Atom Eve, Dupli-Kate, Robot, Rex Splode, & Allen the Alien.

There is an unique feeling that perhaps only seasoned FFL Watchers understand.  It is the feeling of receiving two very different, very large FFL Squads via email several days apart and after examining them both saying to yourself on both occasions:  "That squad is unbeatable".  This instance is rare but not unheard of; and this week was one of those rare occasions........

TEAM, with their apparent size advantage is already positioned successfully around the entirety of the setting; while The Madhouse Leadership namely the strategic masterminds, The Duo of Dark Knights:  Lord Vader and Batman attempt to put together a plan of action that can destroy the terrible TEAM presence, ever visible in this brutal, yet inevitable battle for Playoff Survival.  

TEAM stands on the defensive with a significant hold in the most important settings.  Planets in the upper atmosphere, an ancient beast in the singular ocean, and a massive seven-headed world destroyer which has already taken over the planet's capitol city.  With so many predetermined settings of battle, only about a dozen warriors from each squad wander about the planet and surrounding areas.  

Batman and Vader have formed two elite squads to simultaneously take out Set in the city and the planetary trio in space.  Batman to lead the former and Vader the latter.  

Batman speaks candidly to his hand selected troops in a hidden, undisclosed location in the city.  Batman speaks to Robin, Alfred, Blade, Black Adam, Osiris, & Isis saying:  "Many would say that a group this small has no business attacking an entity of such enormous size and strength as Set.  Several of us here do not even have super powers.  We have seven heads of a city size serpent to destroy.  I am not going to tell you men that I didn't want more members of out team on this squad.  That would be a lie.  The truth is, the only member of our squad who we know is powerful enough to take out a head of Set is The Silver Surfer, he has done it before and I would love to have him in this room; but he is needed by Lord Vader in space, where are brothers in arms face a threat just as arduous as the one we face here.  In space we have Ranx, our most powerful teammate, but he will still need a lot of backup.  Lord Vader and Dr. Manhattan have requested not only all of our space worthy ships which we are short on; but also The Silver Surfer, Ursa, The Beyonder, and Captain Atom.  There is nothing we can do to help them here, and we cannot expect any help from them either.  The bottom line is clear:  There are seven people in this room and the monster known as Set has seven heads.  The task may seem daunting, and we may not come out of this alive; but your orders are clear:  Every person here owes me a head".  

As the epic city and space battles commence, we instead focus our attention on the Playoff Planet's singular Sea.  The Doctor's Madhouse once again is on the offensive and strives to bring the battle not out of the water completely; but at least towards the surface.  The Jungle and Forest are empty and Swamp Thing has joined his team in the water, not only as a fighter, but as the leader, much to the dismay of Ocean Master.  An enormous wake like no mere mortal has ever witnessed formulates as the head and upper torso of Godzilla comes to the surface.  He is surrounded by his TEAMmates, The Phibians, Jack Lalane swimming with handcuffs on and pulling his Jetski behind him, Katara, and her brother Sokka riding above the waves on Appa.  They are met not only by Swamp Thing and Ocean Master, but also by their two Seaworms.  The water erupts as the madness of this skirmish commences.  The Seaworms move towards The GAang members first, leaping out of the water to pull Appa down into it.  Katara with her mastery of water bending attempts to fend off the beasts; but the genetic monstrosities are relentless.  Seaworm #9 swallows Katara whole, while #10 begins taking chunks out of Appa.  But the carnage of the water Shai Haluds would come to an end when Sokka avenges his Sister with a suicidal sword thrust into the throat of the worm as he is being swallowed.  The other being taken out by Jack Lalane picking up his Jetski and using it as a blunt force object to send #10 to The Graveyard as well.  Ocean Master becomes surrounded by the ten Phibians and is able to handle himself for a time, taking out #1, 3, 6, & 7-9 before eventually being strangled out by the muscular and fierce genetic abominations.  Swamp Thing manages to take out the remaining Phibians; but despite his power cannot withstand a full force shot of lightning breath from Godzilla.  

 Deep in the Desert, The God Emperor zips through the dunes with Toph, Momo, Achilles, and his Myrmidons patrolling behind.  They are met by Atom Eve, Dupi-Kate, Rex Splode, & Allen the Alien who have taken to new leadership under Blue Marvel.  Blue Marvel theatrically runs in front of his desert squad, stops, and points giving the signal for his troops to attack.  Rex Splode runs up on Momo and touches him with his finger, exploding the poor little lemur into bloody, fur cutlets which really pisses off Toph.  The Blind Bandit wastes no time getting revenge as she stomps the sand around her into a large concrete slab that lands on the head of Rex and naturally explodes as it crushes his skull.  The earth bender then turns her attention to Allen the Alien whom she thrusts her metal chains upon running him through.  The original metal bender is then stopped from further putting on a battle clinic when she is hit by a massive, manipulated burst of energy delivered from Atom Eve.  Blue Marvel moves towards what appears to be nothing more than a shirtless, young Greek Lad; but soon realizes that he is surrounded by The Myrmidons.  While this fight commences, The God Emperor Leto II is being double teamed by, no triple teamed, wait quadruple teamed, well; you get the picture by Atom Eve, Dupli-Kate, and an ever growing number of duplicates created by Kate.  The two skirmishes go on simultaneously.  Leto pulls arms from his encrusted worm shell and grabs a hold of Atom Eve, breaking her in two; but still finds himself surrounded by numerous duplicates of Dupli-Kate.  The clones move swiftly; but are amazed at how fast Leto is able to move through the Dunes despite his immense size.  A sandstorm seems to envelop as the dunes are thrown about from such rapid movement causing The God Emperor to gain the upper hand and destroy the duplicates one by one.  in the other nearby skirmish, Blue Marvel is picking off Myrmidons, but not nearly as quickly as he thought he would.  Their fighting prowess is unmatched and the heavily enhanced Blue Marvel is amazed that he cannot seem to land a blow on Achilles.  With the appearance of a mere sword wielding mortal, Achilles is far more than that as he is born to be the perfect mortal warrior yet also guided by the gods of Olympus.  The Myrmidon troops of Achilles fall one by one to the might of Blue Marvel, which serves to further enrage the son of Thetis.  Blue Marvel and Achilles find themselves at a stalemate until Blue Marvel feels a disturbance deep in the back of cerebral cortex.  The God Emperor has joined the battle, not only physically; but mentally as well.  This leaves Blue Marvel open to a mortal blow from Achilles who sends his blade deep into the neck of The Mighty Avenger revealing a weakness that even Blue Marvel himself did not know about.  

As what was once the "good" part of town is currently being destroyed by Set and those who oppose him, Dapper Man is rolling around in the "not so great" part of town in a classic, cherry red, near mint 1983 Lamborghini Jalpa.  He stops for gas and pays at the pump so he doesn't have to abandon his vehicle or put out his cigarette.  He says aloud to himself:  "There are yellow lanterns here, I hate yellow lanterns".  Dapper Man was right of course as combatants start moving in swiftly from both teams to start what may turn out to be a great skirmish on the not so great side of town.  Just as The Dapper Man predicted, both Yellow Lantern Voldemort and Yellow Lantern Scarecrow come flying in fast and hit The Dapper Man with a duo of yellow energy fists (luckily The Lamborghini Jalpa was unharmed).  As Master Windu, the Thors and the Zacks join the scene for TEAM, so too do Kid Flash, Invincible, Robot, Duncan Idaho, & Saruman on the side of The Madhouse.  But as this battle gets underway, we shall let it do so as we examine how the epic space and city battles are faring.  

In a perfect world, Batman and his six companions could have each fought with a singular head of Set on their own; but a battle with Set has far too much chaos involved for an idea that straight forward.  Each Madhouse Member has his "set Set" assignment; but really everyone is battling the beast together.  For hours the fight rages on, with death being narrowly escaped myriad times; but without significant damage as of yet done to Set.  Black Adam decides to take this battle to the next level though as he throws caution to the wind and moves in at a breakneck flight speed towards his targeted head.  Osiris and Isis see the bloodlust in the eyes of their commander and fly in fast behind him for backup.  Black Adam sees that their approach is imperfect but he cannot allow himself to be hindered by it.  While Set reaches out with two of his heads, swallowing both Isis and Osiris whole, adding their power to his own immense scale.  Black Adam comes down on the head of Set with a punch that could melt steel beams and delivers a magical lightning blast of incalculable intensity, being the first Madhouse member to succeed in taking out a head of Set.  "One down, six to go".  Batman says over the com as we leave this skirmish once again to examine the final frontier of space.  

As it is everywhere else on the Playoff Map, The Space battle is raging on.  Ego materializes a monstrous hand from his globe like body and wraps the city block size fingers around Captain Atom, dematerializing said arm back into the living planet persona.  Ranx then decides to move as swiftly as a sentient city can and make his play against Ego.  The larger Ego attempts to envelop Ranx; but his yellow lantern energy is simply too much for the Marvel entity.  Such massive power is too much for either celestial being to handle as they join each other in death.  Vader and Dr. Manhattan have split up with Vader taking the clones and Silver Surfer to battle Primus, and Dr. Manhattan taking Ursa and The Beyonder against Unicron; but unfortunately for the already undermanned Madhouse, those are not the only combatants that The TEAM Squad has sent into space........  

Rolling through the old abandoned Tartarian Forest covered ancient *city of The Playoff Planet (*See The Doctor's Madhouse Vs. Darkseid's Horsemen of Apokolips:  Week 5) is Yakub.  Yakub was supposed to be in one of the lamborghinis but his head was too big to fit inside; so when they were trying to figure out which TEAMmember would drive which car it got confusing.  They were originally going to give Yakub Ed's hood a** Plymouth Sundance because it wasn't even black history month or anything, but then they remembered that the two Zachs needed cars and that no universe's version of Zachary Houslander knows how to drive a stick.  But none of that mattered because before they could decide, Yakub stole Conner's Mazda and went looking for a fried chicken joint.  Instead he stumbled upon this ancient city where Yakub decided to get out of his new Mazda and start a new religion (and by start a new religion I of course mean:  Smoke a blunt).  It is at this point that he is encountered by Brainiac.  The two of them, then have to get into a deep discussion of how the world came to be before they have a battle of the big heads.  Yakub almost convinces Brainiac that it was he that originally created the green man to be an evil example of what the true human was supposed to hate and that they should probably go back to his flying wheel in the sky to discuss it further (and by flying wheel in tbe sky, I of course mean his stolen Mazda).  But instead they meld minds and begin an endless mental fight (and by endless, I of course mean it lasted fifteen seconds before Brainiac won and Yakub died).  

{Back to Space}

TEAM's two massive Cybertronian Planets are being backed up by Thanos, Maw, a Kryptonian, a Yellow Lantern, and Astrotrain.  Opting to back up Unicron after receiving orders to do so from the world destroyer himself Thanos and Maw engage Dr. Manhattan who makes short work of Ebony Maw before engaging in a pitched battle with The Mad Titan.  Astrotrain is flanked by The DC Commons as they fly in fast against Ursa.  This leaves The Beyonder on his own against Unicron who doesn't last very long once Unicron begins his transforming process and unleashes some cosmic laser blasts.  Ursa flies towards the dark colored space shuttle, Kryptonian, and Yellow Lantern thinking that she will dispatch them quickly so she can get back to her true purpose of destroying Unicron.  Erz the Kryptonian and Zelda the Yellow Lantern flank Ursa from both sides, while Astrotrain in a surprise move pulls a sharp "L" turn opening his side hatch to reveal a Jet form Blitzwing who flies in towards Ursa and pulls the exact same move, opening his side hatch and ejecting Soundwave in radio form out of his cockpit.  Soundwave then transforms into his robot form and ejects:  Rumble, Frenzy, Ravage, Ratbat, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw, Overkill, Slugfest, Squwaktalk, Beastbox (who instantly merge to form Squawktalk), Garboil, Howlback, Glit, Enemy, and ten more Cassettes causing Ursa to realize that she has far more on her plate than she initially had thought.  Thanos and Dr. Manhattan are in the midst of a fight with mental attacks, cosmic manipulation, emotional warfare, and good old fashioned haymakers, when The two Triple Changers Astrotrain and Blitzwing come in to interfere.  Manhattan turns his attention to the two Decepticons and vaporizes their Cybertronian metal into dust; but Thanos takes that raw energy expelled by Manhattan, manipulates it and directs it back at The Doctor.  "As you always say:  A live body and a dead body contain the same amount of particles".  Says Thanos with a smirk.  Dr. Manhattan makes eye contact with the Mad Titan paraphrasing with his last cosmic breath:  "You could not live with your own failure and where did that bring you:  WITH me".  With this exchange they both cease to exist.  Darth Vader is flanked closely by his two 501st Clones and loyal wingmen as they fly in swiftly towards the enormous robot form of Primus, while The Surfer flies in around the back of the Cybertronian Metal god to hit him from both sides.  Thoughts flood Vader's mind as he attempts to examine what possibilities could arise from this attack.  The Bespin Cloud Car following him are not normally even capable of this type of space flight, let alone the speeds it is attaining by following this close to his TIE Dagger.  But Vader personally modified the craft before the battle knowing what it would need to be capable of.  "I'm good at fixing things......  Always have been".....  Vader says to himself, invoking ancient memories and emotions long forgotten and suppressed.  He witnesses Silver Surfer moving at amazing speeds and hitting their opponent with the power cosmic, doing damage (but not enough).  With no missiles on board The TIE Dagger, Vader knows that he must depend on Silver Surfer to do some serious damage before he can possibly inflict enough destructive force with his basic laser cannons and heavy laser cannons.  The ships move into position when Vader, only as a matter strategy sees that his wingman, the Bespin Cloud Car and the two loyal troopers inside have been obliterated by a laser blast from Primus.  Vader holds his course hearing the macabre, dismissive voice of his old master:  "They have done their duty so we can do ours".  Their attack run on Primus continues......   

{Back planet side}.

While the night sky of The Playoff Planet is ablaze with the space battle above, the battle of the city with the serpent does as well.  With the help of Batman and some laser guided missiles from the Tumbler, Blade was able to daringly launch his Batmobile off the roof of a nearby skyscraper, crash it into a head of Set and then deal the killing blow to the same head with his silver bladed, exploding sword before being swallowed whole by the neighboring head.  Robin, in a suicidal, yet brave maneuver was able to take out a head of the massive, mythological serpent as well by employing some JLA/BatTech built into his R-Cycle inside the mouth of Set's head #3.  Unfortunately, he had to drive the cycle directly into the mouth itself and couldn't make it out to celebrate.  Alfred, was not so lucky.  He may not be an Ace Pilot in an F-15; but he was certainly a capable one.  But it wasn't enough firepower to accomplish his goal before being shot down by a fiery bit of mystical breath.   Batman has managed to take out a head on his own as well; but has exhausted all fo the firepower on The Tumbler.  But even half of Set is still quite an enemy............

{Space.  Again..}

Ursa stands (floats actually) alone in space having not even moved against her dedicated foe Unicron.  She has choked out Erz, defeated Zelda with a blast of heat vision, overpowered the formative Lightning Lad, knocked down the first ten Cassettes that Soundwave's guys used as first line bullet catchers, and turned Garboil, Howlback, Buzzsaw, & Glit into scrap metal before she was overwhelmed by the Unicron enhanced Decepticon firepower from Soundwave and his remaining Cassettes that even a Kryptonian could not sustain.  Unicron still stands basically untouched as Vader and The Surfer continue their attack run on his brother Primus.  Silver Surfer has unleashed a flurry of cosmic attacks as planned but Lord Vader has come to realize that his craft simply does not have the firepower to take down Primus.  It seems Primus may have realized this as well as he focuses his concentration on Silver Surfer.  The now heavily damaged Primus focuses his ancient Cybertronian god-like powers on Norrin Radd causing the chrome body of The Surfer to corrode off of him exposing his underbody to the rigors of space.  Vader knows that this is now a long shot but looks inward with The Force.  He focuses on the spark of the giant Transformer and sets a course directly for it.  Vader, knowing that his ship doesn't have the onboard firepower to make the final shot, ejects himself into space and uses the TIE most literally as a Dagger into the exposed spark of Primus to take him out.  Darth Vader......  Now the sole member of The Madhouse in space is free-floating, sans ship.  Alive, because of his suit; but with no manner of tech to do battle with the planet destroying Transformer known as Unicron.  Batman speaks to the entire Madhouse Squad via com.  Batman says to The Madhouse Members:  "Lord Vader's ship is down.  We will have to try and figure out a different way to take out Unicron".  As Vader floats in the loneliness of space the singular word of Bruce Wayne rings in his head.  "Try".........  "Try".  His training comes back into his head.  "Do or do not.  There is no try"........  Darth Vader achieves a deep Force trance and focuses on the silver board that his now deceased teammate used for transport.  With his mastery of The Force, Darth Vader summons the free floating board of The Silver Surfer and mounts it.  He flies into the mouth of Unicron with The Force as his ally and is guided directly to the source of his spark.  Vader sends one more message via com to Batman saying:  "The plan is still valid.  Execute Order 32".  Darth Vader concentrates every bit of energy he can muster.  A mix of Sith lightning, Physical Force crushing, and mental manipulation as he whispers to himself one last time:  "The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of The Force".  With this final thought, Vader allows himself to be ripped apart as if he were a voodoo doll of the enormous Unicron who is ripped apart as well.  Batman, knowing the secret plan held close to the chest by only he and Lord Vader orders his team away.  Only he remains in the center of Set to use JLA Satellites to manipulate the gravitation pull of The Playoff Planet and direct the cosmic powered, energy infused Cybertronian metal pieces of the now dead Unicron down to the planet, sacrificing himself for the Madhouse as Vader did to destroy the last remaining heads of Set.  

Earthquakes, tremors, and impromptu storms rock The Playoff Planet as the skirmish on the other side of the city continues.  Thor and Thunderstrike work in unison to battle the yellow lantern duo of Voldemort and Scarecrow, when Invincible comes in to disrupt the fight.  The two Zacharys roll up in unison in a Lamborghini and Ed's old Plymouth Sundance.  You would think the Lambo would get there faster, but the Zach in the Sundance took a short cut across the grass.  They J-Turn into position and manage to crush Robot between the two vehicles.  They both jump out in unison with Arc Trooper Zachary blasting Robot repeatedly with his rifle and O.G. Zachary finishing him off with a good old motor city beatdown to the head with his bat.  Duncan Idaho rushes onto the scene after he sees Robot go down and crescent kicks Regular Zack to the head before pulling out his Atreides blade to find a kink in The Arc Trooper armor to take out the other Zachary.  Thor knocks off the head of Scarecrow with his hammer, but instantly is engaged by Invincible in a test of strength.  Thunderstrike doesn't fare as well against Voldemort though as he is hit by a yellow lantern infused death spell from The Dark Lord of the Death Eaters.  Kid Flash moves in at an insane speed, but he arrives at his destination in two pieces as he was met by a purple lightsaber through the chest before he could get there.  Thor overpowers Invincible, albeit with high diff and then bodyslams him to the ground before driving his hammer into Invincible's skull.  The great Norse god is then overpowered by the trio of Voldemort, Idaho, and Saruman.

As we enter the final stage of this battle; the remaining members of both Squads converge on the nearby humid setting in a clearing of the jungle.  Soundwave and his remaining crew, along with Achilles, The God Emperor, and Mace Windu await some potential reinforcement as they take on Black Adam, Brainiac, Voldemort, Duncan Idaho, & Saruman.  Brainiac overpowers the computing memory of Laserbeak, and then is able to physically blow up the advanced leadership focused brain/spark of Ratbat; but is unable to do the same to the many million year old super computer running the systems of Soundwave.  Although Brainiac does make sure to fry the circuitry of the much larger Decepticon Spymaster before he falls to his might.  Black Adam blasts apart the two in one Decepticon Squawktalk, thinking that they had the upper hand, when Jack Lalane, carrying both the hammers of Thor and Thunderstrike, and riding atop Godzilla show up to the skirimsh.  Most fighters can't take the time to break away from their current fight to react; and the action continues on as it had.  Black Adam is having a tougher time than he thought he should against Enemy, when his two brothers Rumble and Frenzy come in to lend a hand.  Duncan Idaho channels the fighting prowess of the ancient Ginaz Swordmasters when he mows through the dinosaur Decepticons Overkill and Slugfest as well as Ravage.  He then engages in a fast paced, pitched battle with Achilles that ends with an Atreides Gom Jibbar in the heel of the greatest Greek before Duncan comes face to face with Leto The Tyrant causing the universe to realize that there cannot be two Kwisatz Haderachs in one place.  They dematerialize and join Paul, their Duke, and Shai Halud in the next realm.  Black Adam knocks Frenzy aside damaging his transformable arm and then delivers spark killing blows to Rumble and Enemy before Jack Lalane screams:  "TEAM TOGETHER" in a last ditch effort to rally his TEAMmates, and is thrown from the back of the monstrous dinosaur as he does.  Godzilla goes for Black Adam after this coating him in lightning breath and finally putting Black Adam's reign of TEAM killing to an end.  Voldemort sends some serious magical/Qwardian power at Mace Windu; but the Senior Jedi Master blocks it with his lightsaber and redirects the energy back at The Dark Lord.  This time, nobody stops Mace and a man too dangerous to be left alive is killed.  Mace turns to Saruman who is channeling every bit of power he can.  Saruman moves in quickly towards Master Windu thrusting his staff into his chest and blowing a hole through him.  Now, at full power, Saruman calls upon his ancient magic to enhance his speed and strength to its limit.  Godzilla postures towards Saruman, the true White Wizard who stabs his wizard staff into the ground and yells:  "YOU SHALL NOT PASS"!!!!  Returning them both to The Valar.

Zachary Houslander awakens from his head trauma and instantly leaps up, grabbing his aluminum baseball bat and looking to join his TEAMmates.  He sees a damaged Frenzy to his left and a bruised Jack Lalane to his right.  

"WHERE ARE THEY?!!?  WHAT'S NEXT?!!?  WHAT HAPPENED?!!?".  Asks Zachary.

Lalane replies:  "We won Kid.  That's what happened".