Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Better Than All of You Vs. Le' Napoleon Brigade

Better Than All of You is Aquaman, Aqualad, Green Lantern, N.S.-5 #1-15, & Dozer #4 & 6.

Le' Napoleon Brigade is Alan Scott, Jaws the Shark, The Lochness Monster, The Sando Aqua Monster, Obi Wan Kenobi, Skyfire, Wonder Woman & Wonder Girl, John Mclaine, & Astro Jetson.

As they are all dropped from the sky Alan Scott grabs the members of Napoleon's Brigade that are not sea creatures and puts them into Skyfire. Skyfire then lands on the small island which is barely big enough for him and lets the team out. Obi Wan says to John Mclaine "this match should go well, I've seen one of those Naboo Sea creatures in action before and I know what they can do. We would be best to just stay up here and let it do the dirty work for us". Mclaine replies with "No F#%^g S%&t man, did you see the size of the f*&#g tank they keep that f$%^g thing in in the God D#$n locker room, that thing could eat Arnold Schwarnzneger (sorry no spell check)". The team then sees a rippling effect moving through the water at them at an amazing speed and then they notice Aquaman's head stick out of the water. Wonder Woman, who has obviousely been hanging out with John Mclaine way to much yells "Holy F*&$g S$#t, they have Aquaman: RETREAT"! Her sidekick Wonder Girl looks up at her and says "retreat are you crazy" Wonder Woman yells "trust me" as Sky Fire transforms and She and Wonder Girl along with the confused and reluctant Obi Wan, Mclaine, & Astro climb in while Alan Scott flies next to them. Wonder Woman who has worked with Aquaman many times in her years with The Justice League had to explain to them that Aquaman has the power to control any sea creature and that they were not only about to be attacked by every member of Better Than All of You but also by their own supposed teammates: Jaws, The Lochness Monster, & the giant Sando Aqua Monster. They finally understand and except her decision as Aquaman and his team celebrate & enjoy the fact that they just achieved a victory without the death of anybody on either side.
BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU IS VICTORIOUS!

6 comments:

Ryan said...

Man, Julie is going to be pissed. I wouldn't want to be in that locker room.

Joe said...

Man, I'll take the win, but I'd be pissed if I were Julie too. Sorry Mrs. Fizzle! How come it didn't go down like that last time we had a water match?

Josh the Commish said...

Strange circumstances, sometimes lead to strange matches friend.

Artifact said...

Thanks Aquaman (aka Josh).

Here is a play by play of how my morning went. I am jarred awake by what sounds like my laptop being smashed on the ground. Then there is a lot of commotion in the bathroom with what sounds like the mirror being smashed. As I am struggling to figure out the situation and decide whether or not to "lock n load", a petite figure of what appears to be my darling wife, Julie slowly enters the bedroom. It was dark so I could only make a few shadows. The shadow began screaming obscenities and yelling something about not even firing a shot. It said something along the lines of "Wonder Woman is a pussy bitch". The voice was as dark and as cold as the emptiness of space. As a chill filled the air, I could feel the evil beginning to drape over me like a blanket. The dark figure slowly raised its arms above its head and, with wanton abandon, began to beat me with a towel rod.

My cries for help did nothing to slow my attacker - in fact, I am confident it fueled its rage. With tears streaming down my face, I started to get really cold and then I blacked out.

I just woke up about 3 hours ago.

Ryan said...

POST OF THE YEAR!!! That was hysterical Fizz! I had a feeling Julie would react that way. But just think, if you win this week, you'll win the conference. Thus re-naming it the "Chris Artrip Conference." So you'd have that going for you... which is nice.

Josh the Commish said...

I thought Wonder Woman's retreat was a selfless act to help save the lives of her team. Although it is a horrible shame that what was, & still is such a great water team lost in both the water weeks. They probably would have beaten anyone else, but Napoleon got quite a crappy draw (looks like Waterloo all over again).