Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Season Four: Consolation Round 2: The Tijuana Taco Benders vs The Untouchables

Taco Benders are Mewtwo and Watchdog #5

Untouchable are Big Bird & Snuffleupagus


Big Bird: “I’m so hungry, why have we been waiting here for the last week. I can only assume that the watcher isn’t going to show.”

Snuffy: “I told you bird, we should have waited until we got the word on the match starting.”

Watchdog #5: “I need to end these two perverts lives. The immorality spewing off of these two is making my skin crawl.”

Mewtwo looks at his teammate with a perplexed look on his face, as he has no idea what kind of offense he could possibly be taking from their two opponents.

Mewtwo: “I would ask you what the said immortality was, but that would imply me even mildly giving a shit about your opinion.”

Watchdog: “Is that right. Well I’m starting to see the sac-religious nature of your being as well. In fact, f#^$ this teammate bullshit, time for you to die you genetically engineered sicko.”

As the soldier brings his weapon up to kill his teammates the powerful Pokemon character takes the gun out of his hand and crushes the barrel.

Watchdog: “What the?”

Mewtwo: “Yeah, you’re not going to help me much right now”

Mewtwo then breaks the neck of his teammate, as he not so quietly says, “Ignorant Asshole."

The starving yellow bird then glanced over at his opponent’s actions with a look of joy.

Big Bird: “Oh cool Snuffy, it looks like they want to get out of here just as bad as we do.”

Mewtwo hears this and immediately heads on over to the other side of the ring.

Mewtwo: “I hear you guys want out of here.”

Snuffy: “Yes, this retard thought it was a good idea to get here a week early.”

Big Bird: “I’m so starving, I will literally do anything to get out of here.”

Mewtwo: “Well (pauses), I have a fairly easy way for you to get back to your team as quickly as possible.”

Big Bird: “Oh yeah, tell me more.”

Mewtwo: “Well, my thought was that if you are so starving big yellow, that you might as well just start eating your buddy over there.”

Snuffy: “Oh, wait a second here.”

Big Bird: “Okay, I’m listening.”

Mewtwo: “Well, that’s pretty much it actually.”

Big Bird: “You know what, that sounds pretty good to me.”

Big Bird then waddles over to his teammate and begins to chew on his back.

Snuffy: “Get the f$@# off of me you yellow feathered f#$%^tt!”

Snuffy then swings his trunk and knocks the bird on his butt. As the two teammates start to go at it, Mewtwo just sits there and starts to laugh.

Big Bird: “Wait a second, you made me do that didn’t you?"

Mewtwo: “Yep. A little to easily actually.”

Snuffy: “Time for us to finally get that meal bird.”

Big Bird: “Hell yeah Snuffy. CHARGE!!!”

Mewtwo: “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

Mewtwo then fly’s up above the two of them to the top of the ring. He then jumps down and snap’s Big Bird’s neck in two. Then before Snuffy can even react, he picks up the Muppet and rips it’s throat out, Swayze style.

As Mewtwo stands in front of the death that he has caused, the door to the cage opens up. He smiles and wonders to himself how it is possible for his team to be as bad as it has been all season with somebody as powerful as him on it.

The Untouchables: All Dead

The Taco Benders: Mewtwo survives.

The Taco Benders are Victorious!!!

1 comment:

Josh the Commish said...

Mewtoo got the red lightsaber.