Wednesday, June 25, 2014

George Lucas Conference Final: Chapter XVI

Black Lantern Aunt May floats down an ancient street within the Playoff Planet’s Eastern City Region.  Suddenly a golden lasso whips around her neck.   BL Aunt May screams as her head is popped off her shoulders. 

Wonder Woman:  She may have been a Black Lantern, but she’s still just an old witch.

Wonder Woman is struck by an orange projectile and falls to her knees.

Wicket Witch of the East:  Who you calling an old witch, girl?

WWOTE barrages Wonder Woman with a flurry of orange missiles, shredding Wonder Woman’s clothes and knocking her unconscious. 

Obi Wan Kenobi creeps up behind WWOTE and his lightsaber slashes through her torso.  Her eyes bug out of her head as she looks down, realizing that she is now in two pieces.

Kenobi:  Never focus on one, failing to see all.

Ironically, the Tumbler Batmobile careens into Kenobi, knocking him across the street and into a pile of stone and marble.  Kenobi is slow to rise.  Deadshot jumps from the vehicle’s hood and fires at the Jedi.  Kenobi, although both winded and wounded, deflects the bullets with his lightsaber.  The Jedi is then set upon by Boba Fett and Darth Talon.  Kenobi knows that he will not last long with these odds.  As if in answer to his feelings, John McClane flies to the scene, using his Mandalorian armor; both lightsabers are drawn.  McClane focuses on the bounty hunter while Kenobi parries with Talon.  Fett skillfully uses his double-bladed red lightsaber against McClane.  Although McClane valiantly defends himself while he battles Fett, Talon unexpectedly manages to Force leap over Kenobi and skewers the New York police officer.  McClane falls to the ground, mortally wounded and dies.

Kenobi deflects the bullets of Deadshot, while battling both Fett and Talon.  Wonder Woman is still incapacitated.  Harry Potter races to the scene, disheveled from having to run almost a mile to arrive.  Kenobi notices Potter.  The aged Jedi closes his eyes and lifts his lightsaber.  Talon and Fett, in unison, slice through Kenobi, but unanticipated is the result of only his cloak remaining.

Potter: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Potter wields his wand and fires at his enemy.

Potter: Expelliarmus!

The guns of Deadshot fly from his hands.  Deadshot rushes away from the area, attempting to locate additional teammates to assist him in his endeavor to kill the Midgets.

Potter: Expluso!

Within Boba Fett’s armor an explosion is heard.  The bounty hunter falls to the ground, dead.

Potter: Engorgio!

Darth Talon deflects the spell with her lightsaber.

Potter: Incarcerous!

Talon is about to fly away, using the power of her rings when suddenly she becomes tied up with the lasso of Wonder Woman.  Talon falls to the ground, immobilized.  Potter steps toward Talon.

Potter:  You killed Kenobi!  You killed him!  Now I need to kill you!  Why?  Why?  Why did you make me do this?

Potter feels a hand on his shoulder.

Wonder Woman:  You will not need to use a curse today, Harry.

Wonder Woman lifts a large rock from the ground.  She looks at Talon.  She looks at Harry.  She drops the rock and crushes the skull of Talon.

1 comment:

Ryan said...

Oh damn.

Harry's pissed.