Sunday, March 29, 2015

Season 8, Week 5 Match: The Royal Highness vs. Obama's Best of Both World's Touring Battalion of Commandos

And the planets of the universe,
Go their way;
Not astounded by the sun or the moon,
Or by the day;
You and I will simply disappear,
Out of sight;
Well but I'm afraid soon there'll be,
No light.”

           
“Planets of the Universe,” Stevie Nicks

 
I look upon the teams which will do battle in this Season 8, Week 5 Match located on the Playoff Planet.  They are as follows:

The Royal Highness: Mogo, Q2, the Grandmaster, The Collector, The Gardener, The Possessor, Apocalypse, Ronan the Accuser, The Blue Marvel, The Flash ( Barry Allen), Paul Atreides, Sandworm 8, Atreides Soldiers 11-15, Spider-Gwen, Spider Girl, Lex Luthor, Molecule Man, Pyro, T-X, Mumm-Ra and Mutt, Deep 6: Attuma with atlas axe, Naga, Orka, Pirahna, Sea Urchin, Tiger Shark, Eggplant Wizard, Doozer 3, Marines 88-90, Futar 1-2, 7-10, Balrog 5, Skeletor’s Crack Troops 2-5, 14-15, Stormtroopers 84-87 and the Death Star.

Commandoes: Whizzy the Super Cat, Batzarro, The Question with Atrocitus’s red ring, Original Human Torch, Rhino, Vindicator, Baby Nightcrawler, Jared Nomak with Despotellis’s yellow ring, Reapers 1-6, Insecticons: Venom, Ransack, Barrage, Chop Shop, Esme Cullen, Alice Cullen, Jasper Hale, Rosalie Hale, T-3 Terminator, Space Jockey, Dr. Alan Grant with green lantern ring, Dr. Elle Satler with blue lantern ring, Professor Henry Jones, Sr. with white lantern ring, Clairy Fray with Katniss Everdeen’s bow and arrow, Secret Circle: Cassie Blake, Jake Armstrong, Faye Chamberlain, Diana Meade, Adam Conant, Melissa Glaser, Jonathan Levinson, Warren Mears, Andrew Wells, Cecelia “CeCe” Jones and Raquel  “Rocky” Oprah Blue, Flynn Jones, Ty Blue, Deuce Martinez, Gunther Hessenheffer, Tinka Hessenheffer, Fox Mulder and Dana Scully, Danger Mouse with red lantern ring, Ernest Penfold with red lantern ring, Herculoids: Zok, Igoo, Tundro, Gloop and Gleep, Jax with yellow lantern ring, Jen Linley with star sapphire ring and green lightsaber, Mansquito, Joan Jett with indigo lantern ring, Gungan Soldiers 14 (trident)-39, Sardakurs 13 and 50-57, Ewok Child 9, Doozer 9, Blue Dragons 13-14, Skeletor’s Crack Troops 7-12, Duncan Idaho Ghola 12 and Sand Troopers 1-5. 

Let the battle begin. . .

The Royal Highness Locker Room. . .

Marines 88-90, Futars 1-2, 7-10, Balrog 5, Skeletor’s Crack Troops 2-5, 14-15 and Stormtroopers 84-87 sit on their bench, waiting for the signal to join their ranks.

Desert [Grid 4.23]. . .

Paul Atreides stands before Atreides Soldiers 11-15.  Atreides scoops a cup of sand in his right hand.  The bottom of his palm opens and the grains begin to fall.

Atreides: These are the grains of sand beneath our feet!  These are the grains of sand of our battlefield.  These.  Are.  The.  Grains.  Of.  Sand.  Of.  Our.  Desert!!!

Atreides raises his left arm and his soldiers follow, crysknives in hand.  Sand Troopers 1-5 take aim at the Dune inhabitants. 

Sand Trooper 1 (laughs):  Who brings knives to a blaster fight?

Atreideis Soldiers 11 and 14 are killed instantly.  Atreides Soldiers 12, 13 and 15 throw their crysknives at the Sand Troopers.  The crysknives split the armor of their targets and Sand Troopers 1, 2 and 3 drop, mortally wounded.  As Sand Troopers 4-5 are about to shoot the remaining Atreides Soldiers, they are swallowed by the sands beneath their feet. A horrendous belch is heard.   

Duncan Idaho Ghola 12 is surrounded by Sardakurs 13 and 50-57.  Ghola rushes Atreides and the two battle one another while the Sardakurs dispel with Atreides Soldiers 12, 13 and 15, only losing Sardakur 13 in the skirmish.  Ghola manages to cut Atreides, but the Mahdi eventually kills the Tleilaxu bred warrior. Just as the Sardakurs surround Atreides, Sandworm 8 bursts forth from the sand, Sand Trooper armor brandishing its gullet.  Sandworm 8 swallows Sardakurs 50-57.  Paul Atreides smiles and stands with his beast. 

Water. . .

Attuma holds an atlas axe, floating with fellow Deep 6 teammates, Naga, Orka, Pirahna, Sea Urchin and Tiger Shark.  Gungan Soldier 14 raises his trident while behind him swim the vicious Gungan Soldiers 15-39. 

Gungan Soldier 14:  Meesa brrothersss and sisterrrss!!!  Wesah swimmmm to victoree, or enter the Graaaveyard!!! 

The Gungans swarm the Highness crew.  Blood filters through the water as the Gungans strike often and repeatedly.  Sea Urchin is miraculously stripped of his power suit and drowns.  The homo mermanus, Orka, is the next to succumb to the sheer numbers of the water Commandoes. The remnant Deep 6ers, in reality, is just too strong for the Gungans.  All of the common Naboo soldiers are eventually killed, but taking in death with them, Naga.

Attuma: To land.

Pirahna and Tiger Shark follow their leader toward the shore.

City. . .

The Rhino careens to a halt as he is webbed by both Spider Gwen and Spider Girl.  Skeletor’s Crack Troops 7-12 burst from a building and begin to fire their weapons at the Spiderverse characters.  Using their spider senses, both Spider Gwen and Spider Girl easily dodge the firings.  The two women use their webbing and strength to dislodge a large billboard of J. Jonah Jameson.  The monstrous structure falls to the ground, crushing all of the Crack Troops.  While the duo search the robotic carnage under the billboard, the two fail to notice Rhino escaping and then running down the street to gather additional forces.

The Royal Highness Locker Room. . .

Marines 88-90, Futars 1-2, 7-10, Balrog 5, Skeletor’s Crack Troops 2-5, 14-15 and Stormtroopers 84-87 sit on their bench, waiting for the signal to join their ranks.

Desert [Grid 1.27]. . .

Doozer 3 meets Doozer 9.  The two fight to an embittered standstill.  Both are bloodied and covered with sand as two blue behemoths lumber to the scene.  Blue Dragons 13 and 14 open their gaping maws and dispense waves of lightning at the two three inch characters.  They are both incinerated.  Mumm-Ra’s Mutt races toward the dragons, loudly barking.  The brutish canine is burnt to a crisp.  Seeing his pet destroyed, the Thundercats’ nemesis calls upon the mystical arts and uses his own form of electrokinesis.  Mumm-Ra’s power shred both Blue Dragons 13 and 14.  Mumm-Ra kneels before his pet and becomes enraged.  Mumm-Ra’s eyes glow with venom.

Space. . .

Mogo orbits around the Playoff Planet.  The entire brigade of Commando ring bearers focus on the living planet’s power battery.   The green lantern’s battery is pummeled by the Question’s red lantern ring, Jared Nomak’s yellow lantern ring, Dr. Alan Grant’s green lantern ring, Dr. Elle Satler’s blue lantern ring, Professor Henry Jones Sr’s white lantern ring, Danger Mouse’s red lantern ring, Ernest Penford’s red lantern ring, Jax’s yellow lantern ring, Jen Linley’s star sapphire ring and Joan Jett’s indigo lantern ring.  The spectrum’s barrage is too much for Mogo’s energy cell.  The battery is overwhelmed and shuts down.  Mogo falls into a comatose state of death.  The planet’s green essence ceases to exist and Mogo is no more in this week five match.

Mountains. . .

While holding his special staff in his left hand, Eggplant Wizard launches his magical attack on Vindicator.  Vindicator’s suit takes the brunt of the burst and throws her into the mountainous terrain.  While focused on Vindicator, Molecule Man swirls his hands and creates an energy beam launched at the Eggplant Wizard.  The Eggplant Wizard explodes.  Meanwhile, Pyro sends a burst of flames at Clairy Fray, who avoids the fires and pulls her drawstring, launching an arrow straight through the eye and brain of Pyro.  Molecule Man pushes a force field around Fray and tightens it, sucking the oxygen from her lungs, killing the Mortal Instruments’ character.  Molecule Man then takes on the Insecticons.  Although the villain manages to destroy Barrage and Chop Shop, Ransack and Venom take advantage of the numbers and destroy the man.  Vindicator joins her teammates after shaking off the effects of the skirmish.

 The Royal Highness Locker Room. . .

Marines 88-90, Futars 1-2, 7-10, Balrog 5, Skeletor’s Crack Troops 2-5, 14-15 and Stormtroopers 84-87 sit on their bench, waiting for the signal to join their ranks.

City. . .

Lex Luthor stands in his battle armor, facing imminent doom.  The Buffyverse trio, Jonathan Levinson, Warren Mears and Andrew Wells has lured the super-villain from his stronghold into the streets.  Having matched the mind of Luthor, the three have concocted a dastardly deed to dispel Luthor from the fight.  Mears presses a button and dance music emanates from loudspeakers which are strewn across the area.  The music plays from the stanza.

Bring the lights up!
Bust the doors down!
Dust yourself off,
Shake it up!
Shake it up!

Cecelia “CeCe” Jones, Raquel “Rocky” Oprah Blue, Flynn Jones, Ty Blue, Deuce Martinez, Gunther Hessenheffer and Tinka Hessenheffer strut from various buildings located across the street. 

Luthor looks in dismay as his suit is being taken over and practically shut down by the superior minds of Levinson, Mears and Wells.  Luthor begins dancing to the music.  He screams and manages to temporarily take control of his suit, blasting Gunther and Tinka Hessenheffer.  Luthor then uses a sonic boom to kill Flynn Jones, Ty Blue and Deuce Martinez.  CeCe and Rocky spring toward Luthor and smile.

CeCe:  This fiery red-head is gonna take you down Luthor.

Rocky:  Down to the ground Lexy!!!

Although Luthor tries to blast the duo, he is unable to do so.  The Buffy trio is in complete control of the armor.  Luthor disintegrates himself.

Dj set it off!
Take it up a notch
All together now!
Shake it up!
Shake it up!

CeCe and Rocky walk toward Fox Mulder and Dana Scully.  The four are then joined by the eggheads.

 Fox Mulder:  Not pretty, but good work guys.  You remind me of the Lone Gunmen.

Dana Scully: Only smarter.

Forest. . .

Once again, the adage of size matters carries weight in the battle held in the Forest Region of the Playoff Planet.  Barry Allen races across the wooded land, focusing on Mansquito.  The Flash manages to kill Mansquito, but fails to notice Ewok Child 9 and unfortunately trips over the Endor inhabitant, breaking its furry neck.  The Secret Circle coven holds the Flash in place with their witchcraft while Esme Cullen, Alice Cullen, Jasper Hale and Rosalie Hale leap upon Allen and tear him apart, bathing in his blood.  T-X comes to the scene and her mimetic polyalloy coating comes to life, skewering the hearts of both Cullens and Hales.   The T-3 terminator then battles its T-X counterpart.  The two battle to a standstill until the Blue Marvel comes to the scene and destroys the T-3 Terminator with his anti-matter manipulation powers.  Space Jockey flies to the scene and immediately is killed by Blue Marvel.

Plains. . .

Baby Nightcrawler bamfs next to Apocalypse and smacks the mutant in the face.  Apocalypse catches the small blue hero by the throat and breaks his neck in one small twist of his hand.  Meanwhile, Ronan the Accuser battles the Original Human Torch.  The two smash each other repeatedly, but the Kree is eventually too much for the hero.  The Original Human Torch’s flames are snuffed out and his life follows.  Reapers 1-6 join the Herculoids Zok, Igoo, Tundro, Gloop and Gleep. Although, once again, the numbers are on the Commandos side, this time it is for naught as both Ronan and Apocalypse easily dispatch with the Reapers and Herculoids. 

Final Battle. . .

The Grandmaster, the Collector, The Gardener and the Possessor stand above their teammates, Apocalypse, Ronan the Accuser, The Blue Marvel, Paul Atreides, Sandworm 8, Spider-Gwen, Spider Girl, T-X, Mumm-Ra Attuma, Pirahna and Tiger Shark.

For the Commandos, Whizzy the Super Cat and Batzarro arrive to the scene, joined by the Question with Atrocitus’s red ring, Rhino, Vindicator, Jared Nomak with Despotellis’s yellow ring, Insecticons – Venom and Ransack, Dr. Alan Grant with green lantern ring, Dr. Elle Satler with blue lantern ring, Professor Henry Jones, Sr. with white lantern ring, Secret Circle: Cassie Blake, Jake Armstrong, Faye Chamberlain, Diana Meade, Adam Conant, Melissa Glaser, Jonathan Levinson, Warren Mears, Andrew Wells, Cecelia “CeCe” Jones and Raquel  “Rocky” Oprah Blue, Fox Mulder and Dana Scully, Danger Mouse with red lantern ring, Ernest Penfold with red lantern ring, Jax with yellow lantern ring, Jen Linley with star sapphire ring and green lightsaber and Joan Jett with indigo lantern ring.

Whizzy the Supercat and Batzarro spring upon both Pirahna and Tiger Shark.  Although the Deep 6 members manage to fight against the two, they are eventually killed due to the sheer power of the Commando duo.  Attuma comes to the aid of his now dead brethren and destroys Batzarro, slicing the twisted doppleganger with his heat axe. The Secret Circle faces Mumm-Ra.  The coven’s combined powers are immense, but still not enough to defeat the undead mystic.  The entire Secret Circle is ripped apart by the magical abilities of a superior foe.   Spider Gwen and Spider Girl finish off the Rhino for good during this encounter, but are ripped apart by the Insecticons, Joan Jett and Vindicator. 

The Elders of the Universe, with the other powerhouses are bombarded by the combined ring abilities of the Commandos.  Miraculously, the Royal Highness team is losing the ultimate campaign due to an onslaught of ring weaponry. The Grandmaster, the Collector, the Gardener, the Possessor, Apocalypse, Ronan the Accuser and the Blue Marvel, all unfathomable power houses, are actually losing the battle to the remaining Commandos.

The Death Star floats into view above the Playoff Planet. Q2 surveys the final battle situation and calculates the ultimate outcome.  There is no other option.  Q2 commences the firing of the battle station’s weapon. 

All inhabitants fighting on the Playoff Planet look to the sky. 

Rocky holds CeCe and the two embrace.  They kiss, their tongues exploring each other’s mouths.

The Royal Highness Locker Room. . .

Marines 88-90, Futars 1-2, 7-10, Balrog 5, Skeletor’s Crack Troops 2-5, 14-15 and Stormtroopers 84-87 sit on their bench, waiting for the signal to join their ranks.

Marine 88: What is that sound?

Stormtrooper 86:  I’ve heard that sound before when I was on the Death Star!!!

The locker room realizes what is happening.

Stormtrooper 87 turns to Stormtrooper 84:  Good to sit alongside you, even though we never made it into battle. . .

An explosion rips across the entire Playoff Planet, destroying the Locker Room and all inhabitants battling upon same.

Death Star. . .

Q2:  The only outcome. . .

Q2 lowers its head and walks to the sanctum sanctorum of the station.

 

11 comments:

Solobeck said...

Commandoes: All dead.

The Royal Highness: Q2 survives.

THE ROYAL HIGHNESS IS VICTORIOUS!!!

NFG Mike said...

Wooooo! Wait, am I going to be billed for Playoff Planet repairs? Because I'm pretty sure that was just a moon that fired the planet destroying laser. Yeah... a moon.

Solobeck said...

Fantastic job. Loved the brutally quick ending. Still trying to catch my breath!

NFG Mike said...

And did I mention the brutally quick ending? I'm so short of breath, it's like I just climbed 75 flights of stairs! And Lex Luthor has formally declared a dance-off rematch against the Shake it up crew! And I'm not sure it's been mentioned, but FANTASTIC JOB!!!

Lickolas said...

Good stuff Becks. Nice win Mike, I am surprised I put up as good of a fight as I did, your team was frickin great.

Also congrats Mike, I had 88 people hit the graveyard in this match, which I believe is a new record. I have nothing to substantiate my claim over then it has to be a record, right?

FFL Administration said...

Paging Ryan the Blue, Ryan the Blue please report to the records department.

Ryan said...

Ugh. Son of a bitch Nick.

-Roster Wizard Ryan the Blue

Josh the Commish said...

Nice work Becks!! Good win Mike!! And damn Nick, is that true?!!?

Artifact said...

Hey. Ho! Don't look now, Mike's 5 and Ohhhhhhh!

Nice one Becks!

Josh the Commish said...

Oh, The Highness pretty much have the perfect season in the bag. They're basically unbeatable..... Right guys?!!?

Ryan said...

84 characters hit the graveyard from the Commandos.
27 from the Highness.
111 characters in total.

I'm up to my eyeballs in graveyard dirt.