Sunday, February 15, 2009

The Brotherhood of Evil Midget's vs. TEAM

The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets is Scrimmell (Designated Leader), Wonder Man, Jedi Knight #33 w/ Jedi Padawan #18, Mouser, Wicket W. Warrick & Ewok #41 & 42.

TEAM (a.k.a. Ryan & his Love Brigade guest starring the Sodomites.) is Ryan Poteracki (a.k.a, Rainbows & Butterflies), Brian Kaczynski, Frodo Baggins, Samwise Gamgee w/ Bill the Pony, Cybertronian Guardian #1, Dozer #7 (a.k.a, The Love Brigade) and Peter Sosa & Mike Sroka (a.k.a, The Sodomites).

“Preseason Matches, you’re kidding me right? You call me down here to tell me that I’ve got to get ready to fight and you are sending me on a match that means absolutely nothing. Who came up with this? I mean seriously, who are the geniuses behind this mess? You know what, fine, I’ll lead your stupid “Preseason” team into battle but from now on, I want to know what’s going around here. I’m Wonder Man for god’s sake, I’m the real deal.”
The Brotherhood’s head coach Alexander the Great just sat there and stared back at the very animated super hero with little interest as he really could care less to what he was saying.
“You done yet Mr. Williams?
“Yeah, I’m done. Let’s just get this league wide joke over with”. Just as he finished his last sentence he found himself standing on the side of a mountain with his fellow teammates. He looked around at his teammates and was surprised to actually see two Jedi’s standing next to him. He now felt a bit better about this match; that was until Scrimmell started to speak aloud to his teammates.
“O.K, gang, this is what coach and I talked about last night. We have heard rumors that they are starting…Is there something funny Wonder Man?”
“Yeah, I just find it hilarious that you think we are going to take orders from you. What are you like our “Captain” this week or something?”
“Actually yes Simon, I am. Look, if you have a problem with taking instructions from me than fine, pretend they are coming from Alexander himself. The reason he chose me is because I was created for the sole purpose of scrimmaging with people, which I realize is a completely ridiculous reason to clone someone for but it did endow me with the unique ability to learn strategy quite easily”, a very astute sounding Scrimmell said. “So if you want to just sit back and laugh that is fine, but when a 60 foot tall robot comes crashing down on top of you in five minutes, just remember, it could have been avoided if you would have put your arrogance aside for just a second and listened to me.”
A very embarrassed Wonder Man just stood there in silence and listened to his designated leader divulge their head coaches plan to win this match. After about five minutes of talking, Jedi Knight #33 turned his head towards the other side of the mountain, as if feeling something coming their way. The plan at the beginning was for everyone but Mouser and the two Ewok’s to stay back and wait for a surprise attack, an attack that was right around the corner.
Meanwhile…”Where are we going Mr. Frodo? I mean I followed you all the way to the fiery depths of Mordor but at least there was a purpose to that. This just seems like a very poor idea.” Sam’s words seemed to just annoy everyone around him, which was nothing new to his teammates, as Sam never seemed to stop talking.
“Yes, I know your feelings on this Sam but it is our duty to our teammates to keep going. It should only be a little bit longer until…(something came out of no where and landed on the ground right in front of Frodo. Being naturally curious he instantly picked it up). Well what could this possibly be”. As Frodo says this Brian Kaczynski screams for Frodo to get rid of it as he recognizes the item as a bomb from the video game Mario Bros. 2. It is naturally to late as the bomb goes off, blowing Frodo to pieces. The blast knocks nearly everyone on TEAM to the ground, sending Bill the Pony into a running frenzy, which leads to him running off of the face of the mountain, sending him to his death. The surviving members of Sam, Brian and Dozer #7 take cover under some rocks as the bombs start to explode at a rate of one every ten seconds.
“This is impossible Mr. Brian, how are we going to get out of this”.
“First things first, do not ever call me Mr. Brian ever again. Who taught you how to speak anyway? Second of all, am I the only one in this crew who ever played video games. Just lay low for a minute and I will take care of this guy.”
Brian then waited for a bomb to explode before running out from the small cave he was under and picking up one of the bombs and throwing it back at Mouser. He waited just a few seconds before hearing the iconic scream come from Mouser that he makes when he gets hit. Brian then waits a good thirty seconds before he realizes that the one bomb was enough to kill the overgrown rodent.
“Huh, I guess the game was wrong, it doesn’t take three bombs to kill him. Come on Sam, grab that Dozer and let’s keep on moving.”
Sam grabbed the Dozer and they continued to keep on moving up the mountain, but not before two Ewok’s suddenly appeared out of nowhere. They both jumped onto Brian and Sam, knocking the Dozer out of the hand of Sam and in one quick motion, crushing the Dozer to his death and stabbing Sam in the chest with a spear. Brian quickly threw the Ewok off of his back and regained his footing. He walked over to the Ewok lying on the ground and kicked it as hard as he could in the face. The Ewok looked dead, but to be sure he grabbed the Ewok’s spear and drove it right into the eye of the now dead Ewok. The other Ewok then ran over to Brian and began to bite his leg, tearing flesh from it and causing him a great deal of pain. Though this was very painful for Brian, it did not take him long to get rid of the small creature. He then picked him up and threw him to his death. Sam’s chest wound would ultimately prove fatal as he soon bled to death from the Ewok’s spear. Brian now hoping that his team’s plan had worked continued up the mountain alone, looking for the remaining members of his opponent’s team.

“The plan seems to have worked master, all I see is one wounded man walking up the hill”, the young Padawan said to his master as he looked down at a limping Brian Kaczynski. “He is just the decoy my young Padawan. The rest of the team is coming up from the other side of the mountain. I sensed it as soon as we were transported here. You too with time will learn to channel your energies in the same way. Right now though, we must concentrate because there is a 60 foot tall robot coming towards us.”
“Wow master, you can sense that as well?” the Padawan said.
“Well yes, plus the fact that he is standing right over there also helps.
The two Jedi quickly stood up and took out their light sabers and ignited them. The brotherhood’s entire team now realized the real battle had begun, as Wonder Man, Scrimmell and the remaining Ewok got ready for battle. They could see the giant robot coming so the two Jedi’s decided to go towards it instead of waiting for it to come to them.
“Master, I think there is something else…” the young Padawan was then cut off by his master mid-sentence, telling him to stop thinking and just keep his concentration on the robot. They could not run at full speed because the terrain was so rocky, but it still did not take long for them to reach their massive opponent.
“I can’t believe this is only a Guardian, Master; I don’t know what we would do if we were actually fighting a real transformer.”
“It looks real enough right now my young Padawan, now stick close to me and let us try to take him down.”
Scrimmell could see from a distance that the two Jedi alone were going to have a very difficult time with the Cybertronian Guardian so he decided to send Wonder Man out to help them.
“If you want me to go I will, but then who will protect you and the Ewok”, a surprisingly concerned Simon Williams said to his designated leader.
“I can take care of things back here. All I have to worry about is the one wounded man below. Now please be quick Wonder Man, it is going to take all you have to kill that machine”.
“If you say so, you’re the boss”. Wonder Man then took flight and began to help out his fellow Midget’s. In all of Scrimmell’s planning though, he had not accounted for any remaining teammates on TEAM, for which he was going to pay for with his life. In the Jedi Knight’s haste towards the robot he had failed to listen to his Padawan’s warnings about a hidden danger. Now given, as hidden dangers go, Ryan, Pete and Mike are not exactly a force to be feared, but for Scrimmell and Wickett W. Warrick it was going to be enough. Ryan and the two Sodomites ran out from the rock they were hiding under and ran as fast as possible towards the two very alone members of the Midgets.
“I hate to ruin you’re perfect plan and all but it looks like there may have been a few oversights in it”, a very arrogant Ryan said to the unflinching clone. “You may have my body, but you will never have my soul”.
“What are you talking about Scrimmell?”
“You’re teammates, the Sodomites, I have a feeling I know what’s going to happen next”, a mildly disturbed Scrimmell said.
“How did you know that was their name?”
“It says it on their shirts, not exactly subtle”.
“Oh yeah, that’s right. I almost forgot I made those for them. Oh well”. At this time Ryan picked up a large rock and began to bludgeon the clone to death. At the same time Ryan was doing this Pete and Mike were taking turns kicking the Ewok in the head. It had not been the most victorious day in the world for the Ewok’s and this entry wasn’t going to help any. Pete and Mike finally finished off the Ewok with one final blow to the skull, followed by Pete picking the lifeless Ewok up and snapping its neck.
As this happened, Jedi Knight #33 felt a disturbance in the force and realized that something terrible had happened to his leader. He looked up at the flying Wonder Man and yelled to him to go check out what was going on. This of course was easier said then done, due to the fact that a gigantic robot was standing right above them, trying to kill them.
“Simon, check up on Scrimmell and the Ewok, I think something terrible has happened. We can handle this guy for a while.”
“If you say so…” Just then Wonder Man looked over at where is team captain was and saw his lifeless body lying on the ground. This enraged the very super hero and sent him straight over to his dead captain. It only took him a matter of seconds to reach Scrimmell’s lifeless body. Wonder Man then looked around and saw Ryan, Pete and Mike down below helping their teammate Brian with his leg wound. Wonder Man then started to head toward the feeble humans, but not before hearing what Ryan had to say about him.
“Oh here we go guys, I wouldn’t worry too much about this guy. I mean, it’s not like he’s Vision or anything.”
This was the wrong thing to say to the already enraged Simon Williams and it took him less one human heartbeat to kill the remaining human’s on TEAM. Wonder Man hit all of them with a blast on ionic energy that would have been enough to take down an army of men, let alone four lowly humans.
On the other side of the battlefield, the Jedi were losing. Sure they had gotten their share of hits in on the Cybertronian Guardian, but the damage it had done was not enough to warrant the exhaustion they both were feeling.
“Master, I don’t think I can keep this up much longer.”
“Just find a rock to hide under right now, I will try to distract him for a moment while you can get out of here and run to safety.” Just as the word safety came out of the Jedi Knight’s mouth the giant robot smashed a side of the mountain and sent a massive boulder down towards the Jedi. The boulder would have killed the Jedi Knight but just as it was crashing down on top of him, his young Padawan rushed in and pushed him out of the way, killing the Padawan in the process.
“Noooooooo.” The Jedi Knight screamed as he watched his Padawan being crushed to death by the boulder that should have given him his last breathe. The Jedi Knight then stood back on his tired feet and with all his remaining energy, ran and jumped up on the robot as fast as he could. The Jedi was now running on rage and was not going to stop until either one of them were dead. Just as the Jedi Knight was about to jump onto the head of the Transformer he felt himself being picked up and thrown down to the ground, but not in a way that was going to hurt him. He looked up and saw Wonder Man flying back up above him and saying to him, “Just stay clear, I don’t know why I didn’t do this from the start”.
He then flew as fast as he could right into the giant robot and blew a hole straight into his chest. The next thing the Jedi knew, an incredibly bright light began to emit from the Transformer. Moments later, the entire body of the 60-foot tall robot exploded from within. After the pieces of metal had flown in a million different directions the Jedi Knight could still only see light.
A couple of minutes later the light faded and all that was left was Wonder Man standing there as if nothing had happened at all. The Jedi Knight got up and started to walk towards Simon Williams with amazement. “I had no idea you were that powerful, this season is going to be better then I thought.” Wonder Man then looked over at his only surviving teammate, took out a pair of sunglasses, placed them over his eyes and said, “You have no idea”.

The Brotherhood of Evil Midget’s is Victorious!

(Editor’s Note: Sorry for the long story but I came up with it last night and couldn’t think of any other way to tell it, I hope you didn’t hate it. I also hope you didn’t mind the liberties I took with Wonder Man. I mean, I read up on him and everything I had him do was within the realm of his story but I also realize that sometimes that stuff can be blown out of proportion. Anyways, I hope you liked it.)

4 comments:

Josh the Commish said...

Oh Darn Ed! I can't wait to use my new AT-ST.

Josh the Commish said...

Oh yeah, and great job Lickolas.

Archr5 said...

Don't you EVER apologize for Art such as this! Epic!

Lickolas said...

Thank you for the kind comments Archr5.