Sunday, April 19, 2009

TEAM vs The Abomitrons

TEAM is Superman, Streaks, Comet, Thor, Thunderstrike, Ragnarok, Treebeard, Galvatron, Depa Billaba w/ Jedi Padawan #16, Yareal Poof, He-Man w/ Battle Cat, Set, Bloodwynd, Nightmare, Baby Wolverine on a 4-Wheeler, Lord Katsumoto, Gannon, Willow, Gen. Thade in a Tank, Jackie Chan.

The Abomitrons are Batman, Robin (Dick Grayson) in The Batmobile (Golden Age), Ace the Bat Hound, Smaug, Iron Man, Capt. America, Bucky, Nomad & Baby Bucky on Speeder Bike, Hancock, Blade, Leviathan, Cerberus, Ben Tennyson, Gwen, Kevin, Mrs. Voorhees, Beast, Kirby, Stryfe, Abin Sur, Commander Cody, Capt. Rex, Elite Clone Trooper #22 & 23 in a Land Speeder, Elite Clone Trooper #24-25, Rotta the Hutt, & Naboo Soldier #1 in a Tank, Fineas & Ferb w/ Perry in an AT-ST, Mara Jade (Jedi), & Death Adder.

The moment The Abomitrons are teleported to the Forest Moon of Endor, they are immediately attacked. Galvatron uses his arm cannon to annihilate the AT-ST that Fineas, Ferb, and Perry were all riding in. Thor then leads Thunderstrike and Ragnarok into battle. Ragnarok, though, has been having serious difficulty working with these two Thors, as he thinks that he is actually the real Thor and not just a cyborg/clone. He flies ahead of Thor and Thunderstrike and immediately goes after Hancock. “Aww Hell no. I dare you to hit me again, Goldilocks!” Hancock says as he wipes some blood from his mouth after being hit in the face with Ragnarok’s hammer. The Thor clone b-line’s it right at Hancock again, but this time he is wrecked with a vicious uppercut by Hancock. Ragnarok is sent sailing backwards. Hancock flies up into the air, hot on the heels of the staggered Ragnarok. He then wrestles the hammer away from the Thor clone and since it’s not actually Mjolnir, he is able to wield it. Hancock then brings the hammer down as hard as he can and obliterates Ragnarok’s synthetic skull. The Thor clone’s limp body the crashed back down to the ground. As Thor and Thunderstrike fly into battle, without warning or provocation, Thunderstrike slams his mace into Thor. “Thou are a TEAMmate, valiant Thunderstrike. Why would thou strike me?” asks a surprised and dazed Thor. “I….don’t….know…” replies Thunderstrike as if he is battling something within himself. Death Adder and Stryfe, who is using his telepathy to control Thunderstrike, attack the two Thors. Death Adder’s massive axe and Thor’s hammer clash, and then Stryfe uses his telekinesis to hit Thunderstrike with a massive boulder. Thor uses Mjolnir to bring down several powerful lightning bolts and sends them coursing through Death Adder, which eventually kills him. Thor then hits Stryfe with his hammer, which releases Stryfe’s mental grip on Thunderstrike. The Thor duo is then able to overwhelm Stryfe and end his life with several well-placed hammer blows. General Thade is currently inside TEAM’s tank, and is not handling the situation very well. He is freaking out and just slamming on the controls with his fists. Naboo Soldier #1, along with the useless Rotta the Hutt, drive up in The Abomitrons’s tank and blow away Thade and his tank, since Naboo Soldier #1 actually knows how to drive the thing. Blade and He-Man are engaged in a well-pitched sword fight. Blade is using his speed and agility to keep He-Man at bay, but in the end the Master of the Universe is simply too strong for the Daywalker to overcome and He-Man buries the Sword of Grayskull deep into Blade’s chest. Battle Cat, Streaks the Super Cat, Comet the Super Horse, Ace the Bat Hound and Cerberus are all fighting each other in a vicious pet fight. Cerberus pounces on to Battle Cat and rips the fearless and powerful tiger apart with his three heads. Ace, though valiant, is really just a German Shepard and has his side kicked in by Comet. Cerberus gets the surprise on Comet and uses his powerful jaws to bite the horse’s head clean off. (If I were The Abomitrons I would then leave said head in TEAM’s locker room as a message, Godfather style. But that’s just me.) Now as it has been through all of time, a cat and a dog face each other for pet supremacy. The saying normally goes “it’s not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog” but in this situation, it would definitely have to be changed to “the size of the fight in the cat.” Streaks zips through the air directly at Cerberus and the three headed dog swallows the cat in on gulp. But Streaks blasts through the dog’s stomach and kills the powerful animal. Nomad and Baby Bucky are weaving though the thick forest upon their Speeder Bike, but Jedi Padawan #16 uses her lightsaber to cut the front of the Speeder Bike off, which sends it careening out of control. Nomad is able to safely leap from the bike with Baby Bucky. Depa Billaba then leaps in and utilizing the lightsaber fighting technique of Form VII Vaapaad, she quickly ends the lives of Nomad and Baby Bucky. Ben Tennyson the turns into Jetray and flies at the speed of sound, firing his neuroshock blasts at Yareal Poof, killing the Jedi Master. Gannon and Willow then double-team Gwen Tennyson and overwhelm her with magic and kill her. Kevin then absorbs the properties of a nearby boulder and knocks Baby Wolverine off of his 4-Wheeler. He starts hitting Baby Wolverine as hard as he can with his rock fists, but Baby Wolverine pops his claws and slices Kevin’s arms off. He then cuts his head off as well. As Jetray flies through the air, he is eaten in a quick snap by one of Set’s massive heads. Pamala Voorhees then attacks Jackie Chan and repeatedly stabs him with a machete. As she continues to brutally stab the action star, Lord Katsumoto comes up behind her and decapitates her with his sword. Iron Man flies in and fires his repulsor ray right at Baby Wolverine, blasting the infant mutant away. Commander Cody and Captain Rex lead Elite Clonetroopers #22-25, with “Double Deuce” and #23 riding in a Land Speeder. Nightmare then attacks the Clonetroopers and immediately takes out Elite Clonetrooper #24 and #25. “Double Deuce” then slams the Land Speeder into Nightmare, which stuns him, allowing Rex and Cody to blast him away. Using all of then energy coming from the deceased combatants from this fight, Bloodwynd blasts a hole right through Abin Sur. Treebeard then slowly stomps his way through the forest and steps on the tank that Rotta the Hutt and Naboo Soldier #1 were riding in, probably not even noticing that he did it. Batman and Robin are both ripping through the trees in the Golden Age Batmobile. They fire a grappling at Treebeard’s leg and start making passes around him (a la Wedge from Empire Strikes Back with the AT-AT). They finally bring the Ent down, which allows Smaug to swoop in and burn him up with his fire breath. Kirby then sneaks up and swallows Streaks the Super Cat. He then burps Streaks out as a bunch of stars, now giving Kirby all of the attributes of the Super Cat. Kirby zaps Willow in the back of the head with his new heat vision, killing the magical dwarf. He tries to do the same to Gannon, but he teleports to safety. Beast leaps onto Lord Katsumoto and starts clawing at his armor. The samurai then drives his sword up underneath Beast’s ribcage and kills the mutant. “It’s a shame. I feel like we would have had good conversations,” laments Lord Katsumoto. He then finds himself face to face with Mara Jade. He defends himself the best he can, but her lightsaber slices through his sword almost as easily as it cuts through Katsumoto. Cody and Rex lead Elite Clonetroopers #22 and 23 against Depa Billaba and Jedi Padawan #16. The Clonetroopers are able to take out Jedi Padawan #16 with ease, but Depa kills Elite Clonetroopers #22 and 23 in retaliation. Then all of the fight is brought to a halt by the arrival of Set. The massive seven-headed serpent quickly and easily blasts Bucky and Mara Jade with his cosmic fire breath. But he is then surprised by finding himself attacked by someone of equal or probably greater size than he; Leviathan. The giant monster immediately bites two of Set’s heads clean off. The other five wail in pain as they attack Leviathan in unison. Smaug flies in and tries to aid Leviathan, but one of the heads sees this coming an blasts him away with his cosmic breath. Kirby uses his new powers to fly up towards Set, but is attacked by the one armed, one-eyed Superman, who has finally entered this battle. Though he is missing body parts, Superman’s sheer strength is too much for Kirby to overcome, and the pink puffball plummets to his doom. Superman flies back to the ground where he is met with a shield right to the face. Captain America then lands a huge uppercut to Superman’s jaw, which lifts him off of his feet. Superman then actually spits a couple teeth out of his mouth. He’s then his with a blast of Iron Man’s repulsor rays. Captain America then leaps on top of Superman and hits him several more times with vicious punches. Superman then sees why he is taking on so much damage; Batman gave his Kryptonite ring to Captain America. This is the last thing he sees before Captain America brings his shield down with all of his might and cracks Superman’s neck. “Nice work, Cap,” Iron Man says on his StarkTech comlink. “There’s no way I would have been able to do that if he was at 100%, we got lucky. Let’s hope Leviathan is having the same luck,” Captain America replies. But unfortunately he’s not. Leviathan is being overwhelmed by Set’s power, but before he finally succumbs, he is able to take out three more of Set’s heads. Hancock this entire time has still been dealing with the problem of Thor and Thunderstrike, and amazingly, he is keeping them at bay. He kicks Thor hard in the gut, to knock him away for a moment. He then flies around and behind Thunderstrike. Hancock wraps him in a headlock and squeezes until he hears a pop. Before Thor can retaliate, Hancock is hit by a plasma blast from the ground by Galvatron. Cody and Rex target Bloodwynd and stun him with their blasters, which allows Iron Man to fly in and deliver the killing blow to him. Batman and Robin then join Captain America, Hancock, Commander Cody, Captain Rex and Iron Man for their final attack. Gannon reappears right behind them and kills Rex and Cody with some magic and then teleports away just as quickly. They find themselves with a terrible decision to make. Do they continue fighting the force of Set (with two heads), Thor, Galvatron, He-Man and Depa Billaba or do they admit defeat and live to fight another day. Hancock is about to make the decision for them as he starts to fly up in the air, but Captain America grabs him by the arm and tells him that this fight is over. “I’m sorry friend, we just can’t risk anymore losses,” Cap says to Hancock.

TEAM IS VICTORIOUS!

1 comment:

Artifact said...

TEAM is a bunch of bums!

Go Untouchables!