Hayley's Comets vs. Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies

“The defects of great men are the consolation of the dunces.”
-Isaac Disraeli

I look to the teams which will do battle at Nick Houslander’s home in this Week 2 Playoff Consolation Match. They are as follows:

The Comets: Donald Pierce and Ewok #76.

The Murderflies: Marines #89 and 90.

Let the battle begin. . .

The Murderfly Marines have returned from a golf outing and are somewhat inebriated. They sit down at Houslander’s kitchen table. They then decide to prepare for the match, which they believe will be over in mere seconds due to their overconfident bravado, by riffing with one another.

Marine #89: We must think as General Lewis B. Puller said- “You don’t hurt ‘em if you don’t hit ‘em!”

Marine#90: As Lieutenant General Victor H. Krulak said –“Being ready is not what matters. What matters is winning after you get there.”

Marine #89 (laughs): Don’t forget Gunnery Sergeant Dan Daly- “Come on, you sons of b#$ches-do you want to live forever?”

A moment of silence ensues.

Marine #90: Master Sergeant Paul Woyshner- “Once a Marine, always a Marine!”

Marine #89: General Pershing- “The deadliest weapon in the world is a Marine and his rifle.”

The two marines grab their rifles and laugh. They then continue with their macho ranting.

Marine #90: A ship without Marines is like a garment without buttons; so said Admiral David Porter.

Marine #89: Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they made a difference. The Marines don’t have that problem. President Ronald Reagan.

The two Marines give a shout out to the former President.

Marine #90: We stole the Eagle from the Airforce, the Anchor from the Navy and the Rope from the Army.

Marine #89: We live like soldiers, talk like sailors and slap the hell out of both of them.

Marine #90: As someone once said- “On the seventh day while G-d rested, we overran his perimeter, stole the globe and we’ve been running the whole show ever since.”

Marine #89: Warriors by day, lovers by night, professionals by choice, and Marines by the Grace of G-d.

The two smile and their minds wander once again, but not for long. Donald Pierce and Ewok #76 come from behind.

Pierce: No G-d here gentlemen.

Ewok #76 drives a spear through the chair which Marine #89 is sitting on and skewers the soldier to the kitchen piece.

Pierce blasts Marine #90.

Ewok #76: Nubnub. Gooweeha. Chubbooka.

Pierce: Never thought they would shut up myself. . .

Hayley’s Comets: Donald Pierce and Ewok #76 survive.

Brock Sampsons’ Fighting Murderflies: All dead.

HAYLEY’S COMETS ARE VICTORIOUS!!!