Sunday, June 29, 2014

George Lucas Conference Final: Chapter XXIX

Emperor Joker: I have no limitations like Mxyztplk when it comes to you Superman.  I’m my own man!

Emperor Joker uses his Mxyztplk powers to crumble buildings on top of both Darkseid and Superman.  The Horsemen duo manages to repeatedly free themselves of the rubble with their powers though. 

Superman races to the Joker at nearly the speed of light.  Emperor Joker notices Superman attempting this feat and waves his hand.  While Superman believes himself flying at one speed, Superman actually only flies at one mile per hour due to Emperor Joker’s abilities.  The Joker cackles as a large mallet appears in his hand.  He tees up Superman and smashes him across the face, sending him careening through several buildings. 

Meanwhile, Darkseid is in a pitched battle with Eradicator.  The two strike one another continuously, drawing wounds upon their enemy with each blow.  The two grip each other in a bear hug, trying to gain the upper hand over their foe. 

Darkseid:  I will win this fight Eradicator.  I have foreseen it in Palantir.

Eradicator:  Not if I have anything to say about it, Darkseid.

Darkseid smiles and fires the full force of his Omega Beams from his eyes, focused specifically on disintegrating Eradicator.  Eradicator screams as the beam rips through his face.  Eradicator’s head explodes. 

Darkseid turns to see Emperor Joker standing next to him. 

Emperor Joker:  Did your rock tell you this one, ugly?

Emperor Joker snaps his fingers and Darkseid’s Omega Beams are unleashed from his eyes.  They rays begin to creep toward himself.  Darkseid is unable to control them due to the reality Joker has spun.

Emperor Joker:  You know what they say Stoneface. . .  Suicide is painless.

Darkseid bellows as his rays rip across his own body.  Darkseid is killed by his own hands. 

Emperor Joker looks to the sky and sees the Phoenix Force hovering above him.

Emperor Joker:  And now for our next chapter boys and girls: “Crushing the Kryptonian.”  Heeheeheeheeheehee.

3 comments:

Ryan said...

Motherf******.

Josh the Commish said...

One's heart should not be beating this fast after reading a blog post.

Ryan said...

At least yours is beating.

I think mine stopped. Or exploded. Either way, there's something dripping out of my ears that I need to check on.