TEAM Vs. Dolla 49 McRib

 TEAM is Tom Bombadil, Huorn #1-4, & Conner Weidman.

Dolla 49 McRib is 6 Cave Trolls, 4 Balrogs, Nazghul #3 w/ Fell Beast, & 9 Dead Men of Dunharrow.  

Today we shall conduct a match in honor of the songs of Tolkien that so guided his literary works; but were largely left out of the cinematic versions. 

This bit of poetic prose should be sung to the tune of......  Well, to the tune of whatever you want; just make it whimsical, with feeling.

Hey dol! Merry dol!  Ring a dong a dillo!

Ring a dong! Hop along! fa lal the willow!

Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!

[Tom answers]:

I'm Tom, Merry Tom Ringing the dong a dillo!

Awakened Tom, Morning Friends, Risen from the pillow!

Tom Bom, I'm Tom, Tom Bombadillo!  

Here to save the Shire Folk from Rock Trolls of the East!

Save the lads from fire foes, dead men, and a fell beast!

The Huorns may be stuck in soil, stationary, with places ner to go!

They defeat the trolls with size and might in a handed bit of ratio!

The Huorns are protectors of the tiny folk of The Shire!

But still succumb sadly to the Balrogs and their fire! 

Hurry may and hurry might, with so little time for singing!

Goldberry has gone on errand and I hear the pub bells ringing!

Awaiting for me is me friend, not too far tis Conner my best crony!

He sits at table waiting for me Tom at The Prancing Pony!

Tis such a rush before me now, late is of the hour!

But descendants of the Old Great Took are needing of my power!

Trouble has befallen them, evil, fierce, and quite a power show!

But Middle earth has protection from Tom Bom Tom Bombadillo!

The Wraith finds his ring is about to shatter and to crack! 

And his poor Fell Beast comes to ground with broken back!

The Dead Men have been relieved from the spell of the king of old!

And returned to their noble traits so let the stories be of them told!

The Balrogs are a frightening lot terrorizing Halflings of the meadows!

But merry, old Tom Bobadil casts them back into the shadows.

Grayson's Goobers Vs. Darkseid's Horsemen of Apoklips

 Grayson's Goobers are Meriadoc Brandybuck, Shadow the Hedgehog (w/ The Chaos Emeralds), & Boba Fett (w/ Dimensional Travel Watch).

Darkseid's Horsemen of Apokilips are The Deadly Viper Assasin Squad (The D-Vas):  Beatrix Kiddo, Bill, Budd, O-Ren Ishii, Vernita Green, & Wlle Driver, Eric Cartman (in The Hulk Buster Ironman Suit), & Autobot Cassette #1.

Week 9 Democracy: The Cowboy Killers Vs. Scar-Jo and Cosby's Trash Pandas

 The Cowboy Killers are Avatar Aang (w/ a Star Sapphire Ring (FINAL DEATH)), Orc #1 (FINAL DEATH), Orc #2, Orc #3 (FINAL DEATH), & Orc #4-5.

The Trash Pandas are Gandalf the White.

Week 8: The Underhills vs The Horsemen

The Underhills are: Magglio Ordoñez, Neo w/ 2 lightsabers, X-24, General Zod, Professor Snape, and Pterodactyls #1-6

The Horsemen are: Supergirl, The Juggernaut, Black Lantern Darkseid, Grand Admiral Thrawn w/Green Lantern Ring, King Leonidas

Overcast at night in downtown Detroit and the lights shine on the Comerica Park field. A soft rumble of thunder can be heard in the distance but any storm seems to be moving away. Six shadows passed over the stadium as pterodactyls shrieked through the air, circling their roost atop the light towers. On the field Magglio Ordoñez is wondering why his Tigers uniform doesn’t fit as well as it once did. He taps his bat against his cleats and starts tossing a baseball up to himself for a little BP before the match starts, trying to recreate the home run from the ‘06 ALCS. Beside him in the on deck circle, Neo twirls two crimson lightsabers, their hum slicing the silence. X-24 slashes at the infield grass while General Zod is levitating just above the pitcher's mound, surveying the field. Chilling in the dugout, Snape starts whispering incantations, preparing his first volley of dark magic.

The air shifts and a boom echoes through the stadium, The Horsemen arrive.

Coming quickly from above, Supergirl landed hard on the Pepsi Porch, cracking the concrete beneath her boots. Her eyes glowed red, scanning the opposition. The wall in left field explodes as The Juggernaut blows through the bullpen wall on a Phil Coke sprint. Black Lantern Darkseid descended from the clouds, death itself in his wake, his anti-life aura blackening the ivy covering the Chevrolet Fountain. Grand Admiral Thrawn, elegant and cold, hovered above the bleachers, his Green Lantern ring pulsing with calculated energy constructs. At second base, King Leonidas stood alone with spear in hand, shirtless and defiant, a relic of war unafraid of gods or monsters.

Zod wasted no time. With a guttural scream, he launched toward Supergirl, fists colliding midair in a shockwave that shattered every window in a five-block radius. Neo ran forward, lightsabers whirling, meeting Leonidas in a clash of ancient combat and digital grace. X-24 leapt like a beast at Juggernaut, who barreled forward, unfazed. Their collision left the infield looking worse than BiCi Field 1.

From the stands, Snape raised his wand.

"Sectumsempra!"

A slash of invisible force sliced toward Thrawn. The Grand Admiral countered with a glowing emerald shield and returned fire, manifesting a pair of green, spectral TIE Fighters that strafed the field. Magglio takes aim at the TIE fighters and hits a perfect line drive straight through one of them, exploding it mid-air. The explosion causes the other to crash into the fountain, flooding the outfield and sending the brand new 2025 Chevrolet Corvette and Silverado EV tumbling to the ground. Both cars are available now at any one of your 38 Metro Detroit area Chevy dealers, starting at around $70k

The pterodactyls screamed and dove in formation, claws aiming for Leonidas and Thrawn. One snatched the Spartan off his feet; he drove his spear upward, impaling the beast midair and crashing to the ground in a tangle of blood and wings.

Supergirl overpowered Zod momentarily, slamming him through the upper deck and into the concourse. But Zod returned, bloodied but smiling, charging her into the Comerica carousel. The two Kryptonians exchanged blows like gods in a hurricane.

Meanwhile, Neo and Leonidas dueled across the base paths. The lightsabers hissed against the bronze shield sending sparks flying with each strike. Leonidas fought with strength and honor, but ultimately, Neo was able to best the Spartan.

X-24, despite his ferocity, was thrown across the outfield by Juggernaut’s unstoppable momentum and was impaled on the statue of Ty Cobb. But as Juggernaut turned to help Darkseid, a swarm of pterodactyls descended, clawing and dragging him into the lower tunnels of the park. Screams echoed. Then silence.

Darkseid advanced. His eyes flared with omega beams. Snape shouted “Protego Maxima!” just in time to deflect them, though the shield cracked and buckled. Thrawn’s ring transformed into a barrage of alien weapons. Magglio ducked and ran for cover.

Snape, bleeding and drained, cast one last desperate spell—“Fiendfyre.” A dragon of living flame roared into the sky, engulfing Thrawn's constructs. Thrawn, anticipating this, sealed himself in a green sphere, but couldn’t counterattack in time. The flames consumed the bleachers, and both Thrawn and Snape vanished in fire and smoke.

Neo, now beside Zod, faced off against Supergirl and Darkseid. He nodded once to Zod.

Zod flew at Supergirl again, buying Neo time.

Neo rushed toward Darkseid, blades igniting at the last second.

The field exploded in light and a blast of energy tore through the stadium.

When the dust settled, only one man stood.

Magglio Ordoñez surveys the carnage. X-24 disemboweled on the Georgia Peach, Juggernaut lost in the depths and buried under rubble, Leonidas slain at second base, Thrawn incinerated, Neo unmoving beside Darkseid's crumpled form. Zod and Supergirl had vanished into the clouds, still fighting for all of eternity..

Above, a single pterodactyl circled silently.

Magglio raised his bat one last time, picked up a baseball, and hit the perfect home run into the 8th row of the left field grandstands. He smiles, raises his fist, and starts rounding the bases in victory.

Week 8 Consortium: Grayson's Goobers vs Dolla 49 McRib

Grayson's Goobers are: Red Hulk, (Legends) Luke Skywalker (w/ a blue lantern ring), The Fantastic Four: Mr. Fantastic, Invisible Girl, Human Torch, and The Thing, and Venom

Dolla 49 McRib is: Count Dooku, Arcee, High Evolutionary, The Technibots: Scattershot, Strafe, Lightspeed, Afterburner, and Nosecone, Xavier Harkonnen, Harkonnen Soldier #2

FFL 2025 Week 8: Trash Pandas vs. The Sigmas

Cosby and Scar Jo’s Trash Pandas: Thor, Gandalf the White, Batgirl (Cassandra Cain), Naruto, Radagon, Peregrin Took and Pete Rose w/ a baseball bat

The Sigmas: Bane, Blake Corum, Tarnish, Dwealin, Duncan Idaho, Maverick, Goose, Iceman, Slider, John Rambo, Shadow the Hedgehog, Grand Slam and Femen #1-6

What an FFL match we have here today folks!! As we have a fierce interdivision match up today between the Trash Pandas and The Sigmas. These teams have made it quite known that they don’t like each other, so look out for that today folks. 

Today’s ball game takes place at the home of the Gritty, American League leading Detroit Tigers!! 

Comerica Park!!

Rod Allen joins me in the booth today.

The Trash Panda's are lined up on the third base line while The Sigmas are lined up on the first base line as the announcer calls for the removal of everyone’s caps as the singing of the National Anthem is to take place.

Jack White plays a solo guitar rendition of the anthem while a trio of F-22s do a flyover of the stadium on this sunny, brisk April Sunday afternoon.

The Sigmas will bat first while the Trash Pandas take the field as they are the home team today.

The Trash Pandas defensive lineup today goes as follows. Gandalf on the mound, Naruto in Left Center, Thor in Right Center, Radagon at First, Batgirl at Second, Pete Rose at Third/Short, & Peregrin at Catcher.

Shadow the Hedgehog leads off from the right hand batters box for The Sigmas, as Gandalf throws a sweeper that catches the outside corner of the plate. Rod, that sweeper is looking good today for Gandalf there. Rod says “Yeah Kyle, Gandalf’s been gifted a plus sweeper by the hand of Era Iluvatar.”

Second pitch comes to the plate and Shadow hits a hard one hopper directly to Pete Rose. Rose makes a quick throw across the diamond as Shadow was flying down the line. Oh what a play there Rod, Rose caught the one hopper right off the bounce and made an excellent throw there. Rod says “Yeah Kyle, Gandalf’s sinker caused that ground ball there. If Gandalf’s got that pitch working today, it’s gonna be a quick game today for the Trash Pandas.”

Maverick walks up to the plate and sets his stance in the right hand batters box. He sets his feet with a narrow and open stance. Gandalf starts his windup and hits a pitch high and inside on the fighter pilot, knocking Maverick to his butt as he dodges the pitch. Maverick is stunned as he almost gets hit there and starts bad mouthing Gandalf from the mound. The Sigmas dugout is now yelling to the ump, telling him to do something about this. The ump points at the Sigmas dugout and Gandalf, giving them both a warning. As the great Vin Scully once said, “Comerica Park has gone from a ball field to a school yard where the ump looks like a teacher that sees trouble.”

Maverick gets back in the box and recollects himself, as Gandalf starts the windup. 

BOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!

Folks, I don’t know what’s happened but, the infield and the dugouts have collapsed into the earth like some sort of sinkhole.

The Trash Pandas have lost Peregrin Took, Naruto, Radagon and Pete Rose.

While The Sigmas have lost Blake Corum, Tarnish, Dwalin, Maverick, Goose, IceMan, Slider, and their Fremen.

All of a sudden Bane and Grand Slam have been dropped off into centerfield from a helicopter as Gandlaf exclaims “you did this didn’t you?! You rigged the field with explosives?!”

“Yes” Bane states, “It was the only way I thought The Sigmas could win this lopsided match up, The Sigmas may have lost some of their own, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make”

Thor has lost patience with this conversation and calls for a thunderbolt to his hammer. He charges his hammer and shoots a bolt of lightning to Shadow and John Rambo. Immediately killing them.

Bane attacks Batrgirl, at first her nimbleness allows her to dodge some attacks from the strong masked man. But eventually he gets a hold of her and breaks her back over his knee like he did to her mentor. Then he grabs her neck and snaps it with ease.

Grand Slam shoots a rocket at Gandalf but he uses his power as the wielder of the flame of Anor to to create a force field around himself. Gandalf then calls for Thor to help. Thor calls for more lightning to his hammer and then shoots it at the transformer, Gandalf joins him by calling for a lightning strike to hit Grand Slam. The combination of both strikes melted every MOSFET and Capacitor in the transformer. Rendering him defeated.

Now all that stands is Bane and Duncan Idaho against Gandalf the White and Thor.

I wish I could say this was a close match but it was not.

Gandalf fought Duncan Idaho while Thor fought Bane.

Bane charged Thor and attacked with a couple furious combos but Thor was able to block and dodge all with ease. Thor then picked up Bane and used his hammer to fly a mile high up in the air. Thor then dropped Bane and let him fall to his death.

Duncan’s skill with a blade was impressive to Gandalf but eventually, Gandalf’s combo of blade and magic was too much for the warrior from House Atreides.

Gandalf and Thor walk out the park and head to Tin Roof for some nice ales to cap the night off.

The Sigmaz Vs. The Cowboy Killers

 The Sigmaz are The Dinobots:  Grimlock, Slag, Sludge, Snarl, & Swoop, God Emperor 40K, Death, & Ronald McDonald w/ Grimace, The Hamburglar, Officer Big Mac, Mayor McCheese, Birdie the Early Bird, Captain Crook, The Professor, & Fry Kid #1-3.  

The Cowboy Killers are General Kenobi, Homelander, Dunadan Ranger Kyle Houslander (w/ The Omnitrix), Hope Summers, Magneto (w/ a red lantern ring), Big Benito (w/ a wizard staff), & Degen #1-2.

It's a gorgeous Spring Day here at Comerica Park.  Luckily us broadcasters get free concessions because I didn't bring $900 with me and I am on my seventh hot dog, third Italian Sausage, and fifth Miller Light, not to mention the peanuts, cracker jacks, and those purple cone things with the sweet something or others in them that I have never actually gotten at any sporting event or concert before because overpriced is okay with me when it involves meat or booze; but other than that I'm just not 'bout it.  I'm smoking a big fat cigar too, because where I reside in the world of fantasy that is Fantasy Fantasy the world is still free and you can smoke in an outdoor venue without some Karen crying about it, ending up in me getting arrested because I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA.  

I'm trying to enjoy the game, but it is really difficult with The Dino-Bots outside the stadium blocking out the Detroit Skyline and destroying the upper deck.  Shouts of:  "Me no Baseball Player, Me Grimlock, Me King", are heard by thousands of frightened fans who are literally peeing and pooping themselves all over the insanely expensive seats that The Illitches have plagued the hard-working people of Detroit with after a semi-successful season last year.  The two Degens sent by The Cowboy Killers are the first two casualties of Grimlock and the boys.  Which is unfortunate because they had just grabbed themselves a fresh Watermelon White Claw and lit a couple of Red Newports.  "Saturday is for the boys" yells Slag; but Snarl argues back saying:  "No.  Saturday for Dino-bots".  The Dino-Bots are the single most powerful and coolest characters in this match; but I think this may be an example of how we really need to get down on The Commish about explaining the settings better at the draft while nobody is paying attention because they are all listening to Kyle and Alex argue about sportsball.  Because the Dino-bots are making a big bad mess of The Copa; but they aren't really able to get inside the ballpark where the rest of the combatants are located.  Luckily I, as a Watcher do not have to figure out a way to officially get them into this match because The Cowboy Killers played Magneto, the ultimate Transformer ratio.  Magneto strains and concentrates with all his might to use his mastery of magnetism to take control of all five Dino-bots' bodies and crush them all together, dropping an enormous, single clump of Cybertronian metal on Woodward Avenue.  Magneto collapses into his bleacher seat from exhaustion; but nobody around him really takes note because they just think it is an old, drunk gay guy that looks like Ian McKellan.

Death and Hope Summers meet up and realize that Death and Hope are actually the same thing.  There is some darkness for you Young Bloods reading this to soak up with your Gen Z Angst.  They join each ohter in the bleak, vastness of despair that is life.  

The Emperor of Mankind and Homelander meet up with each other right at second base, now completely disrupting the game causing the Umps to call the day.  They rush towards each other and start trading blows.  And I don't mean punches, I mean the really icky kind of blows because they are both Turbo Ghey.  As their "fight" reaches its climax (I know you saw what I did there) they both crumble into a pile of unironic quotidian character arc as if they were in the presence of a true Kryptonian White Castle fart.

But alas, this was all part of The Master plan laid out in The Sigmaz locker room by Malcom X himself.  He had inside intel that The Cowboy Killer front office was not going to play Superman or Martian Manhunter again; so Malcom decided to bench his top people as well and play nothing but a roster of Crackah A** Crackahs.  Led of course by his faithful servant Rondald McDonald wearing white face to mock the weaker race that Neva wuz Kangz.  Ron and his elite McDonald's Crew search the stands for the remaining Cowboy Killers looking to destroy them to the last man.  General Kenobi, Kyle Houslander, and Big Benito have legit forgotten that there is a match going on as they are just hanging in The Exclusive Tiger Den getting high key Crunk and ripping death sticks and Dunhills despite Marlboro Reds being the official dart of The Cowboy Killers that all team members are issued before each match.  General Kenobi feels a disturbance in The Force burning through his Miller Lite Haze and gains the attention of Kyle and Big Benito.  "Listen up you two", says Kenobi.  He continues:  "I know the two of you have had your differences; but I need you to work together.  I know you can't box against Big Benito Kyle; but can you box with him"??  Benito stands up and grabs his wizard staff in the most regal manner nodding to Kyle and Kenobi both.  Kyle looks his fellow killer of cowboys in the eyes and says:  "You shall, have my sword, and uh.....  My Omnitrix, AND MY last three Dunhills".  They cash out and leave the Tiger Den and due to some lazy writing by me walk out the double glass doors right as The Ronald McDonald Crew are walking past the concession stand nextdoor.  "Oh......  DAYUM, I see what up.  Whiteys on The Cowboy Killahs is too good to drink with the rest of us.  They gots to go in the Tiger Den to get they crunk on".  Says Ronald McDonald obnoxiously for everyone in earshot to hear.  The clown Prince of Cholesterol adds to his rant:  "I see y'all Crackas is stepping down them stairs from The Tiger Den thinking Y'all better than The Sigmaz.  You think cuz you got the High Groud that you better than the Sigmaz??  We real Sigmaz Sigma".  "Don't try it Ron".  says Kenobi with White privilege oozing from his aura.  But Ronald flings some Pedo-80s-comercial-magic at the General from the low ground and ends up sliced in half......  The rest of The McDonald's Crew are shocked and jump into action after witnessing the death of their fearless leader.  "We allz real Sigmaz, Sigmas".  Mayor McCheese yells as a battle cry as the crew moves in unison against The Cowboy Killer Trio.  "YOU SHALL NOT PASS" Yells Big Benito as he stabs his staff into the concrete spraying Birdie and Officer Big Mac with deadly classic cupped pepperonis.  Kyle sheaths his Ranger Sword and grabs his Omnitrix as he is surrounded by The three fry kids.  Fry Kid #2, knowing it is his final FFL appearance fry kids even harder than the other two fry kids; but still ends up a fried kid when Kyle uses the omnitrix to do whatever it is that I don't remember it does; because it has been like ten years since I have seen that show and I don't feel like looking it up when the match is this close to being done.  Kenobi has stabbed his lightsaber into the gut of Grimace; but it is taking a super long time for it to melt the walking taste bud as he twists the saber to melt him just like Qui Gon did to the blast door at the beginning of The Phantom Menace.  Hamburglar sneaks up behind Kyle with a knife, but Big Benito jumps in the way of the blade to protect him.  Big Benito knocks Hamburglar's block off with his staff; but catches the blade intended for Kyle in the chest to join the burger thief in death.  Kyle runs to Benito grabbing him in his arms saying:  "Benito.....  This isn't fair.  You create such good quality food, how could you die at the hands of The Crack Danks Crew"??  "Behind you" Benito says to his frenemy Kyle with his dying breath.  Kyle listens and pulls his Ranger Sword, Spinning around to take off the head of Captain Crook.  Kyle and Kenobi regroup and fight back to back with perfect Form 3 stature, lightsaber and broad sword in hand as they work together to finish off Mayor McCheese and The Professor.  

TEAM Vs. The Doctor's Madhouse

 TEAM is Zachary Houslander (w/ an aluminum baseball bat), ARC Trooper Zachary Houslander, Thanos, Maw, The Legion of Superheros:  Mon El, Triplicate Girl, Phantom Girl, Invisible Kid, Star Boy, & Lightning Lad, Achilles, & Kefka.

The Doctor's Madhouse is Miguel Cabrera (w/ a cyrsknife), Justin Verlander (w/ a blaster), Max Scherzer (w/ a blaster), Tarik Skubal (w/ a Maula Pistol), Kerry Carpenter (w/ a crysknife), Chris Artrip: Fremen Warrior, Kurt Houslander (w/ a Power Glove), Frank "Wendeezys" Metvier (w/ endless zyn & a Variety pack of 4 Lokos), Ursa, Invincible (Mark Grayson), Atom Eve, Dupli-Kate, Robot, Rex Splode, Allen the Alien on a Trike, Blue Toad, & Yellow Toad.

Week 8 Democracy In The Copa: The Washington Redskins Vs. David Byrne's Meat Suits

 The Washingtion Redskins are Yoda (w/ Dwarf Ring #4), Black Lantern Wolverine, Sinestro (W/ The White Lantern Ring), & Powergirl.

David Byrne's Meat Suits are Moon Knight, Trap Jaw, Emma Frost, Madeline Pryor, Brainiac 5, Prowl, Airmen #11-20, William "Refrigerator" Perry, & Charlie from The Music Shop (w/ a pump 12 gauge shotgun). 

Week 7: Pandas vs Meat Suits

Black and White Painted Dogs: Cyclops, Jean Grey, Iceman, Archangel, Beast, Aquaman, Avatar Roku, Amon, Ming-Hua, Apollo, Artemis, Wartortle, Zombie Seaworm, Mathew Perry, Captain Jimmy Wilder in a F-18

David Byrne’s Heralds: Avatar Korra, Unalaq, Desna, Eska, Jar Jar Marines (10), Boss Nass, Kosa-Yin Hadu, Captain Tarples, Gungan Soldiers #1-10, Piplup, One Punch Man, Seaworm #7, Seaworm #1A (final death), Vampire Seaworm, Black Lantern Seaworm, Slippy Toad, Scarlet Witch, Quicksilver, Yellowjacket Hank Pym, Norman Rockwell w/ Blue Lightsaber, Lewis, Clark, Sacagawea, Homer Simpson, Marge, Lisa, Bart w/ Dark Brandon’s AR-14, Maggie, Santa’s Little Helper, Jar Jar Binks

Yes… yes… the humble vacation abode for the Houslander name venturing back a millennia. Fortunately for the Houslander members who keep their water interactions secluded to Traverse Bay, this ferocious battle will venture into the mysterious depths of the WORLD FAMOUS BUCKE-…. I mean… LAKE MICHIGAN (just a friendly reminder that Gus Johnson’s dumbass is an Ohio State Fan). And as always for settings like this, those who are not necessarily “made for water” will be given complimentary breathing apparatuses (as both teams made this decision). In this instance, the breathing apparatus is strikingly similar to the “Bubble-Head Charm” from Harry Potter used by the likes of Cedric Diggory (prayers up RIP) and Fleur Delacour during the second task of the Triwizard Tournament. Although, the durability of said air bubble cannot be guaranteed…One last measure of housekeeping involves the Captain of the Black Knights Squadron, Jimmy Wilder, whose appearance in an F-18 is impractical underwater and you might as well refer to this guy as “Goose” because he’s dead before he even hit the water.

—

With all of that settled, let’s dive deep into this top secret underwater city-scape. Now there is no tangible proof of the existence of this atlantis-like city that rests at the bottom of this beautiful lake, but my watchful eyes will have to suffice for proof of reality.

The heralds of the great David Byrne have assumed control of the city center as this team consists of many Gungans, Northern Water Tribe folk, and various water versions of Dune’s Shai-Hulud, all of whom are very comfortable in this setting. In the seaweed (yuck) outskirts of the city rests the opposing dawgs painted black and white to resemble pandas? I don’t know about you folks, but it just seems to me like a poor replication of blackface… you do you I guess. Regardless, Scar Jo’s peeps start their silent maneuver through the city’s outer rim to try and reach King Jar Jar Binks. They first encounter the Simpson family eating burgers at the Krusty Burger (don’t ask why the mysterious underwater city has a Simpsons staple restaurant, just accept this franchise’s wide audience reach) who are taken out quickly by Ming-Hua’s elite water bending abilities. While they may have thought they were efficient and silent, it is unknown to them that Quicksilver was running around as surveillance and caught the act and silently notified King Jar Jar.

As Cosby’s group continues on, it is them who are surprised and are attacked by all the Gungan soldiers. Captain Tarples is able to end Artemis with a precise spear throw, but the rest of the Gungans quickly fall to the work of Jean Grey’s abilities. King Jar Jar was still upset with how he was banished some time ago by the Gungans, this is why he sent them first on this sui-slide mission.

After the “pandas” have made it the majority of the way to the city center, they find a large open area they need to pass to reach the front door of the city center’s castle which is circled above by the many seaworms. The team makes a break for it, but are only halfway when Heralds of David Byrne begin popping up out of nowhere. In reality, it is Quicksilver who is transporting the heralds to surround the trapped “pandas”. While successful, Quicksilver uses far too much energy and has run out of oxygen in his air bubble. Now it is an all out brawl with both teams giving it everything they’ve got. Jean Grey on Scarlet Witch, Piplup on Wartortle, Avatar Roku on Avatar Korra, and so much more. The murky depths are shaken and the muddy waters are making it impossible to see who’s winning what. After many screams, cries for help, and cheers of success, the water finally begins to clear, showing the remaining alive and those who’ve fallen.

One Punch Man stands alone protecting the castle doors hiding away King Jar Jar and the final line of defense seaworms. Opposing the lone man, Aquaman leads a heartbroken Cyclops holding the lifeless body of Jean Grey, the cool guy Iceman, Beast, and their own zombified seaworm. The bald headed superhero appears familiar to the X-men group, but the speed and power he moves at when punching Beast into oblivion sends shutters down their spines. Cyclops finally makes an appearance in battle by shooting a laser beam at the caped foe, but narrowly misses. However, he did not realize the beam would destroy his own air bubble and began to drown. Iceman begins frantically trying to ice One Punch Man and is successful, but not until after their lone seaworm is mutilated. With One Punch Man immobilized, Cyclops sends one last beam through his skull before finally drowning. 

Aquaman and Iceman need to fend off 4 seaworms to be able to finally face King Jar Jar. Seaworm #1A moves straight for the Omega level mutant, Iceman, and is completely unbothered by his attempt to freeze the mighty great maker and Iceman is swallowed whole. With the king of the seas facing four large creatures, he remembers his hydrokinesis abilities and simply uses them to force the great creatures to eat each other.

Finally, one last person is left before Aquaman. He bursts into the great hall of this underwater castle only to find that King Jar Jar’s random clumsiness and luck has run out as Jar Jar appears to have slipped and hit his head causing his own death. So much for the supposed Darth Jar Jar rumors…

—

In a bonus side story, a retelling of Mathew Perry’s fate unfolded. He yet again got really high on various drugs, and again decided to take a face down snooze in a bathtub (not very effective when you’re already completely underwater). Fortunately for this time around, the beloved Friends character was granted his air bubble like everyone else at the start of the match. It allowed him to live!! Yay!! I can’t belie– wait, what are you doing?? Oh ma lawd he just popped his own bubble to drown himself…

Darkseid's Horsemen of Apocalypse vs. Dolla49 McRib

Darkseid’s Horsemen of Apocalypse: Poseidon, Qwsp, King Sidon, The Tiger Sharks: Mako, Walro, Gupp, Octavia, and Lorca, Gannon, Kamek, Diddy and Dixie Kong, Donald and Daisy Duck, Arsenal w/ Red Lantern Ring, Dante, Katow Joe, Zombie Black Lantern, Vampire Black Lantern

Dolla49 McRib: Broly, Aqua Girl, 3 Seaworms, Piccolo, Ronald Regan w/Indigo Lantern Ring, World Serpent, Fing Fang Foom, Zues, MewTwo, 3 Kryptonians, Uncle Grandpa, Black Lantern Jedi Master, Blue Beatle, Zombie Green Lantern, Blue Lantern, 2 Yellow Lanterns, 1 Chatari Leviathan

The air is thick with tension. On the east shore of Lake Michigan, The Horsemen assemble. At the forefront, Poseidon, sea god and commander, slams his trident into the wet sand. Beside him is Qwsp. King Sidon gives a nod to the Tiger Sharks—some bippen underwater heroes ready for battle. 

Across the lake, a deafening roar signals the arrival of The Dolla 49 McRib squad.

Floating above the water is Brolly, radiating Super Saiyan fury, his aura lighting the sky. At his side, Aqua Girl with three monstrous Seaworms slithering behind her. Piccolo levitates calmly while aura farming before the battle.

Then comes the surreal—Ronald Reagan, resurrected and wielding an Indigo Lantern Ring, preaching compassion and American politics. Uncle Grandpa starts to shout nonsense that somehow bends reality. 

Poseidon raises his trident: “Let the sea judge you!” Thunder crashes as he and Zeus launch the opening blows, waves clashing against lightning. The force sends a shockwave across the lake, creating a whirlpool where water and lightning merge.

Broly charges with a berserker's rage, only to be intercepted by Dante, who counters but is no match for this Sayian god.  Broly whoops his ass all the way to Grand Haven.

Meanwhile, Qwsp traps the Kryptonians in a pocket reality of infinite banana peels, only for Uncle Grandpa to arrive riding a toaster and undo reality itself, freeing them. Diddy and Dixie Kong team up with Katow Joe and Octavia to ambush Blue Beetle, launching from tree to tree in a jungle they conjure from nothing.

The Tiger Sharks dive into the lake, meeting the Seaworms in a frenzy of fangs and fins. Mako bites one in half while Walro uses tech to shock the others. 

High above, Arsenal in red-ring rage duels the Yellow Lanterns, screaming, “YOU TOOK MY PEACE!” Blood constructs clash with fear-made monsters.

Ronald Reagan, eyes glowing with indigo compassion, tries to reform Ganon, who sneers and hurls a trident of dark fire, burning through ideology and idealism alike.

On land, Donald Duck, now the storm mage “Quacknor the Tempest,” summons cyclones that tear through Zombie Green Lantern and fling Mewtwo momentarily—but Mewtwo rebounds, capturing Donald in a psychic prison shaped like a duck cage.

Zombie Black Lantern and Vampire Black Lantern tear into the Leviathan, who slams them with a massive tail, cratering half the battlefield.

King Sidon battles Aqua Girl, trident vs. waterbending, dancing on waves like gladiators of the deep. Piccolo joins the fray, splitting into clones—only to be countered by Kamek’s multiplying magic.

Then everything freezes—Mewtwo, amplifying time dilation, stops the battle for a brief second... just long enough for Zeus to gather a storm to end them all.

But Qwsp, unfazed by logic or time, simply rewinds the moment and replaces Zeus’s lightning with confetti and rubber ducks.

As the battlefield erupts in chaos, Blue Lantern empowers the surviving Lanterns, and with the help of the god poseidon they are able to take down the egomaniac Broly.

Poseidon dives deep into the lake, awakening something older than even himself—the Heart of Lake Michigan, a primordial sea spirit. It rises, a leviathan of water and spirit, swallowing the Chitauri Leviathan whole.

Mewtwo and Ganon face off in the center, until the Zombie Black Lantern infects them both with anti-life for a terrifying instant. But Blue Lantern’s hope burns through the corruption, leaving Ganon in ash and Mewtwo weakened.

As the energy of gods, lanterns, mutants, monsters, and maniacs overloads the very fabric of the lake, reality begins to tear. Uncle Grandpa accidentally eats the fourth wall, briefly showing viewers that the battle is being livestreamed by Rick Sanchez.

Finally, Poseidon, bloodied and battered, locks tridents with Zeus, whose rage becomes divine wildfire. But in a twist, Ronald Reagan steps in, quoting, “Mr. Zeus, tear down this storm.” and channels indigo light through the divine ether.

In a thunderous final blow, Poseidon and Sidon combine forces striking down Zeus in a blast that empties the lake and refills it in an instant.  Although this reveals Fing Fang Foom hiding at the bottom of Lake Michigan.  

He has lost his element of surprise and is struck down with yet another thunderous blow that empties the entirety of the Great Lake.

The battlefield is quiet. Most of both teams lie unconscious. The survivors regroup on a floating island formed from the remains of the Leviathan.

Poseidon, bruised but triumphant, raises his trident. “This lake... is protected.”

Ronald Reagan, now sipping tea “In the end, compassion and chaos were the only constants.”

A duck quacks.

The credits roll.

Week 7: Doctor's Madhouse vs Grayson's Goobers

Doctors Madhouse: Ursa, Ocean Master, Aqualad, The Deep, Swamp Thing, Ulmo, Kit Fisto, Avatar Wan, In a Speed Boat: Kurt Houslander w/ Power Glove and Frank “Wendeezys” Metivier w/ Endless Zyn and Variety Pack of Four Lokos, Seaworm #2A-3A (#2 is final death), Atlantean #1-8, Blood Bender #1-2, Water Bender #1-4

Grayson’s Goobers: Avatar Kyoshi, Beast Boy, King Shark, Octane, Mr. Freeze, Killer Frost, Ace Duck, Donkey Kong, Bowser Jr, Frozone, Admiral Ackbar, Swamp Bender #1-3, Meta-Knight, King Dedede, Sub Zero, Kyogre, and Stark Android #1

Today these two teams will do battle in THE greatest Lake that is Lake Michigan, a body of water that has been lucky to witness decades of Houslander vacations; including the 2 #7’s challenge, the incredibly creative and inspiring statement “I’m on vacation, I can do whatever I want”, and the infamous flat line breath taking tackle that Zach Houslander landed on yours truly in the summer of 23’... we can only hope to see some action that matches those moments in entertainment today. 

This skirmish gets started with Ocean Master and Aqualad leading the way for the madhouse, jogging in unison into the lake from grand traverse bay. Aquaman’s pupils, who’s life goals are to reach the king of the seven seas excellence, are excited to participate in a skirmish in which they won’t be overshadowed. Swamp Thing's Aura is immaculate, hovering at a medium speed alongside his team, approaching the Goober’s who are stationed smack dab in the middle of the lake. In fact, The Swamp Benders were so honored to be in the presence of Swamp Thing that they all pooped their pants and killed themselves because there was now nothing else to live for. 

The Goobers have constructed a base similar to the fortress of solitude between Mr. Freeze, Killer Frost, Frozone and Sub Zero utilizing their powers above the water as much as they possibly can. King Shark and Beast Boy, who has converted into a Great White Shark to accompany his teammate are circling the base with Avatar Kyoshi standing guard at the front gate, sending giant waves in each direction. Above the base is Meta-Knight and King Dedede, both eager to swoop down and pounce on the oncoming Madhouse members with the remaining goobers lying within the walls of the fortress. 

This is quite the scene, Im having a blast swirling around the water from a decent distance on a jet ski that I definitely didn’t pay for, awaiting the collision that is about to commence. 

The Madhouse are gaining momentum, going from jogging - to riding on one ginormous tidal wave as a collective towards the goobers created by Ulmo. The only exception being Kurt and Frank on their speedboat and Ursa racing ahead by flight.

Approaching 50 yards from the ice fortress, The Madhouse leap off of the tidal wave and jump to the offensive. 

Ursa burts towards the two flying Goobers in Meta-Knight and King Dedede and plays a deadly game of wackamole with the two Kirby characters, demolishing them both in seconds with Dedede’s giant hammer. She then does the same to the sole puny Stark Android who came to their aid way too late. 

Beast Boy locks eyes with The Deep, noticing he’s attempting to take control of his mind telepathically but is failing miserably as Beast Boy retains his human brain in his animal form. Beast Boy charges at Ulmo and takes a CHOMP from his midsection, separating his body into 3 floating lifeless pieces, kicking this match off by creating a literal blood bath. 

“NASTYYY AHH FLESH BRUH!!” Beast Boy screams out in disgust, with a trailing King Shark chuckling. 

“You’ll Get used to it” King Shark says in a sharl, doing the same fatal deed to the OG Avatar, Wan, who had no response to the speed and size of the meta human enhanced Great White Shark. 

Beast Boy then perfectly segue’s into a giant octopus and starts dotting up King Shark’s mouth with the madhouse commons eight at a time until every last Atlanteon, Blood Bender, and Water Bender is devoured. Kurt and Frank are having quite the time getting crunk on their speed until Beast Boy continues his clinic, slamming the boat down and grabbing the two with his tentacles, giving them the same fate as their common teammates. Frank had a smile on his face the entire time he was airborne and was just casually saucing zyns into beast boys octopus mouth at an extremely impressive rate, giving him the nicotine high of a lifetime. King Shark is now big time suffering and is extremely sick as he just ate fifteen bodies and swam right after (this is a big no-no). Not to mention he also appears to have 4 upper decky zyns chilling under is lip as somehow frank has turned into a zyn distributing ninja in his dying breaths. 

Kit Fisto is using the force to leap frog towards beast boy and king shark saying “Yay” with each jump. I’m honestly not sure if he’s just really excited or if he went full retard, he doesn’t typically talk much. 

Kit takes one last lunge towards King Shark using a trail of water to thrust himself at an epic speed in which he ignites his lightsaber and severs his ginormous head, killing the shark for good. Immediately, he turns towards the front gate of the base where Kyoshi is throwing everything shes got at him attempting to throw him off of his game. Bobbing and weaving up and down through the water, Kit easily dodges everything Kyoshi has to offer and sends several lightsaber slashes through her body leaving her in a pile of ash. Looking it up and down, Master Fisto sees that it is an extremely dense block of ice acting as the front gate barrier and there must be a different way to break through. 

Elegantly, he dives deep under water to check out the foundation of the goobers base seeing that it is extremely stout and expanding before his eyes outward, up and around the water. 

“This things gotta come down ASAP” Kit Fisto reports back to the Madhouse. 

“Copy that” says Ocean Master.

Donkey Kong is darting through the water with his unprecedented swimming expertise that hes displayed over the years. He’s searched every inch of this lake for a barrel with the power to bring his good buddy Diddy to the party (ayo) but has had zero luck, so this gives him even more of an urge to punch something as hard as he possibly can. 

Frozone has come out from within the fortress to help Donkey Kong hold off the madhouse a little longer so their base can continue to expand until there is no water left to solidify. 

Frozone begins to flash roads of ice waxing and waning through the air in which DK is rolling around like a bowling bowl ready to make his move. Once he gets close enough, DK catapults off of his ice slide and charges up a punch that connects with Ulmo’s right cheek, shattering his skull while he emotes in gorilla and dives perfectly back into the water to regain his upwards momentum. Flinging back above, rolling upon a perfectly placed slate of ice by frozone, DK launches towards aqualad and grabs ahold of his neck, snapping it in half and hurreling him into the distance. 

Donkey Kong has attained some unfamiliar blood lust as his family is no where to be found, he has no plumber to torture, and no barrel to craddle. He begins to shed a tear, a confused gorilla blessed with an incredible ability just needs a close friend at this moment, and all he gets is a back breaking kick from Ursa who finally puts the monkey to sleep. 

“Destroy the fortress, NOW! Yells Ocean Master

Swamp Thing confronts it, soaking up the water like a nerf ball and stretching vines with high durable girth, crushing the exterior ice shield. Ocean Master plants his trident on the tip of the fortress summoning a devastating lightning strike to come down and crumble the foundation, KILLing Killer Frost and Frozone who were in the wrong place at the wrong time, and opening the door for Ursa to finish the base off with a jab of kryptonian strength. 

The Goobers who once had an extreme tactical advantage are now scattered across the lake and in close quarters with their opposition. 

Bowser Jr who has been playing his gameboy in his clowncar waiting for action within the ice walls has begun flight towards Kit Fisto alongside Kyogre. Bowser Jr. flings a flurry of bombs at the Jedi Master in which he redirects with water orbs with clutch and close timing. But the flurry doesn’t end, Bowser. Jr lays down roughly a hundred parachuted ba-bombs that Kit Fisto is struggling to keep under control, this serves as a perfect distraction for Kyorge who generates a mini whirlpool, swallowing and sending Fisto pummeling down through the lake to his death. Ursa then sent a wave of heat vision in the direction of Bowser. Jr, creating a ba-bomb fire work show that was fatal to the bowser clone. 

Seaworm #2 has laid dormant at the bottom of the lake for the majority of the match and has seem to eaten his brethren out of sure boredom and #3’s lack of awareness. It’s attention has been grabbed with the colossal explosion happening several hundred feet above as It rushes towards the surface. The spice retained from his fellow worm has enhanced his speed and stength, leading to it swallowing Octane and the huge Octopus that is Beast Boy in one spoonfull. 

The tide is shifting; Ocean Master relieved Ackbar and Kyorge of their lives with his Trident and Swamp Thing is drowning the remaining Goobers with little resistance. 

Mr. Freeze and Sub-Zero tried to reinforce their earlier ice synergy but were done with through brute strength and mass. 

With one team remaining, the water is calming and the minnows are coming out of hiding. 

“Today, I am King” Ocean Master says with a cocky smile on his face. 

Ace Duck ate bread on the beach for the entirety of the match and is now living the rest of his life annoying the people of North Shore Inn who are too stupid to stop feeding the ducks.

Week 7 Staff Consortium: Sigmas vs Cowboy Killers

Sigmas: Anakin Skywalker in TIE Dagger, Falco in Arwing, Duncan Idaho in B-Wing, Starscream, Elden Beast, Ramjet, The Blob, Dirge, Nightmare, Witch King of Angmar on Fell Beast

Cowboy Killers: Namor, Triton, Namorita, Dorma, Atlantean 1-10, Ajax, Beowulf, Hecate, Martian Manhunter

The Washington Redskins Vs.The Sigmaz

 The Washington Redskins are Aspen, The Sando Aqua Monster, Allicon #1-5, Abe Sapien, Kermit THEE Frog (w/ G27 & G40), Squirtle, Atlantean #9-10, Tommy Oliver, Roy Houslander (w/ The Houslander Family Katana & The Darksaber), Sinestro (w/ The White antern Ring), Chuck Norris, Kup, Bat-Mite (w/ Dwarf Ring #6), The Toxic Crusaders:  Toxie, No-Zone, Major Disaster, & Junkyard, Chian (w/ a Green Lantern Ring), & Danny Ocean.

The Sigmaz are Sanji, Zoro, Jimbo, Robin, & Franky w/ N-Sync in The Thousand Sunny, The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles:  Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello, & Raphael (all w/ Glocks), Jason Voorhees, Mega Man & Rush, Powerglide, Brightburn, & Death.

Week 7 Democracy: TEAM Vs. The Underhills

 TEAM is: Godzilla, Katara, Sokka, Toph, Appa, & Momo, Vah Ruta, Vah Medoh, Vah Rudania, Vah Naboris, Phibian #1-10, Gizmo, Kyle Houslander, Jack Lalane, Moby Dick, DC Thor, Beta Ray Bill, & Go-Bot Renegade #2-4.

The Underhills are:  Black Manta, Mera, Namora, Percy Jackson, The Seacons: Nautilator, Seawing, Overbite, Skalor, Snaptrap, & Tanktail, X-Man, Ikaris, V (for Vendetta (w/ a green lantern ring)), Kyle Rayner, & Xenomorph #6-15. 

Darkseid's Horsemen of The Apocalypse vs. Team

The Horsemen: Ultron w/ The Infinity Gauntlet including the Power and Time stones (FINAL DEATH), Nekron, Black Lantern Darkseid, Black Lantern Apocalypse, Black Lantern Agent Smith, The Eradicator, Zombie Superboy, Grand Admiral Thrawn in The Phoenix TIE Fighter, Wedge Antilles in a Y-Wing, Biggs Darklighter in Cubs Fan Han’s TIE Slicer, Starfire, Eric Cartmen in the Hulk Buster Iron Man Suit, Paradoom #1-3

TEAM: Unicron, Primus, Ego, Blitzwing, Legion of Superheroes: Mon-El, Triplicate Girl, Phantom Girl, Invisible Kid, Star Boy, Lightning Lad, Alex Houslander: Indigo Lantern, Maria Ianni, Alex Houslander w/ Super Scope 6, Yakub, Sweep #1

 The cold vastness that is space was overwhelmed with the sense of the impending doom that would set forth momentarily.  The Justice League Headquarters was the next victim of destruction from the almighty FFL. This match will be hosted and narrated by the esteemed  watcher that is Wendeezys.

 

I sense a feeling of impending doom coming forth to us this week.  We have a titan vs. titan match up in the American League. TEAM and The Horsemen are 2 teams that have Universe Bowl aspirations and this regular season match could hold a lot of weight in the standings at the end of regular season writing.

 

And here comes Ultron, big dick swinging on his final death and wielding the infinity gauntlet with 2 stones (Power and Time).  Darkseid seems to be letting him have his possible final moment knowing who is really the big dawg of this monstrous team.  Also joining the two is Agent Smith and The Eradicator.

 “Hey Wendeezys, are you blind blood? This match started like 30 minutes ago you think we would be the first to show up for our team?” shouts Ultron

 

“Huh” replies Wendeezys

 

Crashes begin to cause ripples through space knocking Wendeezys off his flying Nimbus right into the Justice League headquarters.  

 

 Inside the headquarters we observe a battle. 

*Sorry wendeezys hit his head on the way down causing some brain damage*

 Eric Cartman in the Hulk buster suit unleashes a ballistic assault on both of the Alex Houslander’s from TEAM.  One a renown sniper with a super scope six, and the other wielding a lantern ring in the fight.  Sniper Alex emits a barrage of fire on Eric Cartman.  The accuracy can only be compared to that of Legolas, one of the best archers we have ever feasted our eyes upon. 

 Zombie Superboy comes to the aid of Eric Cartman. Although a replication of Superman and being zombified he remains a strong source of power for this team.  His attack directs right to Sniper Alex who shits his pants in anticipation of the attack causing him to miss his shot and take a right hook that made him die on the spot… while also shitting his pants again. 

 Lantern Alex laughes hysterically at the thought of other Alex shidding them drawers and is attacked by Cartman who unleashes a beam of light from the palm of his hand incinerating the Lantern Alex.

 “Dude totally not kewl, I think they both shit their pants when they died” says Cartman.

 Well my head is feeling better and my flying nimbus is back.  Let's check out the surrounding space for the rest of the fight because it sound like it be boppin out dur.

 Holy hell they do be boxin out here.

 The arrival of Unicron and Primus have the attention of Ultron, Darkseid and The Erradicator.  Looks like off the brand Avengers and Justice League, The Legion of Superheros is duking it out with Agent Smith and Apocalypse.

 Once foes now fighting along side each other Unicron and Primus seem to be working well together.  Bold strategy from TEAM lets see how this plays out Cotton.  

The two sadistic animals begin to attack each other first.  Darkseid a worthy tyrant to fight the rage and murder that consumes Unicron.  Their attacks make ripples travel across space itself.  All while Ultron is taking on the living embodiment of the Transformers.   

 Ultron forced to go all out against the transformer begins to throw lasers across space out of rage because this will not be an easy fight but it unfortunately hits the Justice League building killing his allies Cartman and Zombie Superboy.

 “Sheeeiiittt” says Ultron

 Ultron takes a huge blow from Primus.  Causing his AI to run out of control losing all access to his abilities outside of flight.  He has no choice but to flee the scene for now.

 Darkseid remains the favorite in his fight against Unicron.  His stamina and strength were what gave him the upper hand in this fight.  Bringing Unicron to his knees.  “CITY BOY” screeches Darkseid as he disposes of Unicron.

 Ultron while hiding keeps hearing a voice in his head.  Very subtle but he can still hear it through the heat of battle.

 “Simulation failing”

 Meanwhile the fake Avengers are throwing hands with Agent Smith and Apocalypse.  Or should I say on Apocalypse.  The Legion of Superheros are fighting there to inflict as much friendly damage to Apocolypse as possible.  Agent Smith will have to calculate his next moves carefully.  While this is happening Grand Admiral Thrawn in The Phoenix TIE Fighter does a suicide mission to help the out numbered Agent Smith.  While trying to hit Lightning Lad he missed but hit Invisible Kid instead.  He couldn’t see him but he torched his ass.  Oh hell here comes another its Biggs Darklighter in Cubs Fan Han’s TIE Slicer who was able to hit Lightning Lad this time around.  

 Starfire also joins the fight to help Smith

 Starboy jumps into the action increasing the weight of the wreckage and huals it towards the two Horsemen who are able to effectively dodge the attack.  The Princess Starfire hurls flashes of light through the sky only to be met by Mon-El’s heat vision.  The arrays of light go back and forth for what seems like and eternity until it releases an unrelenting explosion towards the two killing them both. 

 Agent Smith is continuing to dodge the incoming attacks from the remaining Legion of Superheros.  Smith is able to move swiftly enough to attack all 3 of the Triplicate Girl ending her useless life. Haha women 

 What was that?  It feels like the Justice League building is shaking.  Wait thats not a building.  Its Ego hiding his true form!

 Ego starts with an onslaught of attacks.  The angered planet unleashes a blast that destroys Apocalypse and everyone on it.  

 “What the fuck” says Wendeezys in that accent from that hick dude that ranks the random flavors. Iykyk 

 Well we have come down to our final opponents. From the Horsemen we still have Ultron, Nekron, Black Lantern Darkseid, and The Eradicator.  From TEAM we have Primus, Ego and Blitzwing.  

 Wait a minute did I say Nekron

 A sinister laugh is heard from the distance.  My Black Lanterns have done my bidding making me stronger through this whole fight.  No one can stop me.

 “Blitzwing attack this retard” says primus 

 Blitzwing charges toward nekron who avoids the attack but is able to touch him while evading.  This allowed the fatal touch to consume Blitzwing.

 The Horsemen begin the following attacks.  Darkseid and The Eradicator team up to face the remaining transformer.  Darkseid takes charge towards the hunk of metal trying to win this fight with pure strength.  Ego wasn’t going to allow this to happen and grabbed the god right out of space.

 “You may have survived the destruction of a planet, but this time the only thing that will be destroyed is your legacy” says Ego as he crushes Darkseid into almost nothing.

 Ultron still around the fight with his AI going more and more crazy.  

 “Abort simulation, simulation failed” repeating in the head of Ultron who begins to lose sanity.

 Nekron and The Eradicator are all that are helping against these two Titans from TEAM.  The end is looking near for the Horsemen as The Eradicator goes down.  Leaving only Nekron to fight planets.  

 “GET OUT OF ME FREAKING HEAD MAN” screams Ultron “I CAN’T TAKE THESE VOICES ANYMORE MAN”

 Ultron makes a b line for the two planets.

 “NO, STOP, DON’T DO THIS” shouts Nekron who knows that Ultron is going for the Ultimate suicide mission but his words couldn’t over power the voices in his freaking head man.

 With the power of the Gauntlet Ultron is able to destroy everything insite besides Wendeezys tho because he da Goat.

 …

 …

 …

 …

 …

 …

 “Simulation Complete, did you enjoy your possible future Mr.Ultron” says his internal AI

 “Who the fuck is Wendeezys?” asks Ultron.