Team Sleeping Pussy vs Logical Genocide

Team Sleeping Pussy is Wildcat.
Logical Genocide is Goro w/Yellow Lantern Ring, Sniffles the Ewok and Roster Filler Smurf.

“I thought this fight was supposed to take place INSIDE this Godforsaken R.V.?” Wildcat says to himself as he drives down US-23 towards Standish, Michigan, all the while smoking an Arturo Fuente Hemingway cigar and slugging back a cold Pabst Blue Ribbon.  “I’m telling you one thing, if I get up to Timber’s before I see any of these yahoos, I ain’t… what the hell is that?!”  Wildcat notices a yellow flash from out in the distance.  All of a sudden, he sees Roster Filler Smurf flying at top speed towards the R.V.  Roster Filler Smurf hits the windshield and splatters on impact.  “Aww God, that’s gross,” Wildcat says as he turns the wipers on and smears light blue blood all over the now cracked windshield.  As Ted tries to keep the R.V. on the road, he hits and runs over what looks to be a dog or small bear cub.  “Damn it! Now what?!”  he grumbles as he stops the R.V. and gets out.  Wildcat walks over to find the bloodied and partly flattened body of Sniffles the Ewok.  “Huh? Two down.  This should be an easy fight.”  As he goes to climb back into the R.V., Wildcat is knocked into a street sign by a bolt of yellow energy.  Goro then uses his Yellow Lantern Ring to fly up to Wildcat and uppercuts him with his two lower fists, which sends the boxer flying into the air and lands on top of the R.V.  Wildcat shakes the stars from his eyes and leaps off of the roof.  He connects with a double axe handle, stunning Goro.  “Alright Big Boy, let’s dance!” Ted Grant exclaims as he hits the half man/half dragon with a quick combination of rights and lefts.  Goro then grabs a hold of Wildcat and with a flick of his wrists, snaps his neck.  Goro raises his arms into the air in victory and let’s out a mighty growl.

“Not so fast there fella. It’s going to take a lot more than that to keep this cat down,” Wildcat says as he realigns his vertebrae. He leaps up and rocks Goro off of his feet with a vicious uppercut. He then grabs a hold of Goro and suplexes him onto the hood of the R.V., crushing the front end in the process. Wildcat then leaps up and delivers an elbow to Goro’s sternum. Goro kicks Wildcat back and uses his ring to drive a yellow energy spike directly through Ted’s heart and dropping him to his knees. Wildcat looks up at the behemoth and smirks as he grabs a hold of the spike and pulls it out of his heart. The former Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the World then lunges at the Mortal Kombat giant. He pins Goro up against the R.V. and starts throwing haymakers like they were going out of style. Goro manages to grab Wildcat and flip him through the windshield of the R.V. He then rips the door off and stomps his way inside. Goro tears the roof off as he slams Wildcat against the interior of the R.V. Goro then targets the gas tank as he flies out of the vehicle and ignites the fuel with his ring. The R.V. explodes with Wildcat inside. The blast launches him high into the air, where Goro grabs him and fires him back down to the ground, shattering his bones on impact.


The half man/half dragon goes back down to US-23 to claim his victory over Wildcat, but his body is nowhere to be found. The old boxer sneaks up behind him with his cat like stealth and leaps up onto Goro’s back. He savagely gouges Goro’s right eye out, causing the monster to let out a horrific scream. Enraged, Goro reaches around and grabs Ted and snaps his back over his knee. Goro tosses his limp body down to the ground and he grabs his head where his eye once was. There is another cracking of bones as Goro hears Wildcat chuckle. “Heh, didn’t you already… cough… try that trick?” Wildcat says as he spits some blood and probably a couple teeth to the street. “Come on, you can do better than that… Ugly!” This infuriates Goro. He snatches Wildcat with great speed and pulls on Ted Grant’s limbs with each of his four arms. Wildcat resists the urges to yell in pain for a while, but once Goro pulls the first limb right off of his body, it proves to be more than he can handle. Wildcat screams in agony as Goro rips the remaining limbs from his body. Ted’s bleeding and broken torso drops to the street and Goro obliterates what’s left of it with his Yellow Lantern ring. He then lets out an incredibly loud roar in triumph.

LOGICAL GENOCIDE IS VICTORIOUS!!