Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Horsemen vs Commandos

Horsemen of Apokolips are: Darkseid w/ Palantir, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, White Lantern Sinestro, Annihilus, Optimus Prime w/Roller, Godzilla, Green Lantern Ryan Poteracki, Bruno Sammartino, Stitch w/Green Lightsaber, The Celestial: Ace Frehley, and Darth Vader Sith Starfighter Transformer





President Barack Obama & Miley Cyrus' Touring Battalion of Commandos are: Kingdom Come Superman, Earth 2 Superman, Martian Manhunter, Vampire Orion, The Atom, Thanos, Aleta One "Aletamus Prime", Hermione Granger w/ Blue Infinity Gem, President Barack Obama w/ Purple Infinity Gem,  Benny, Isa & Tico, Black Lantern Doozer #1, Doozer #13, and 3 L.M.D.s
 
Ace Frehley floats in space, waiting. He's taps into his Celstial awareness to keep tabs on the battle he is a part of. 
 
He sees White Lantern Sinestro pop Black Lantern Doozer like a pimple and make the comment "The only good black is a dead one." This causes the entire squadron of Commandos to besiege him.  Sinestro swats them off easily with the various hues of lantern power, ending the FFL careers of Benny, Isa and Tico as he proclaims "Speak American here in America. Not your Mexican talk". Doozer 13 is squashed and told he was "Back in the dirt where he belongs". The Atom flies at Sinestro in his smaller form, attempting to deliver his signature, tiny knockout punch, but Sinstro catches him. He puts Ryan Choi in his mouth and bites down, killing the Atom. Sinestro cackles "I don't know why I ate him. I'm always hungry an hour later after eating Chinese, or Japanese, or whatever he was"
 
"Buddy. I'm afraid I'm gonna have to send you to one one my death panels" says Barack Obama as he marches in, rolling up his sleeves. 

"You'll never take my guns, you commie!" Sinestro screams as he conjures up a giant cannon and blasts him right in the chest. 

"ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME!!!" screams the triumphant Sinestro

"And I have, you racist piece of garbage" growls vampire Orion. Fueled by the nuclear blood of the monster Godzilla, whom he just dispatched, Orion overcomes the light of Sinestro's ring and murders him. His vampire hearing pick the the sound of a ring hitting the floor as Brandon Inge arrives of the scene and the two face off.

"Hey, f**kface. Let's do this. Mano e mano"  Inge cracks his knuckls and puts up his dukes.

"Fool. You dare to challenge a GOD? I don't need the powers of a vampire. I shall beat you to death slowly. And painfully." He delivers powerful haymaker to the stomach of Inge, knocking the air out of him and breaking a rib. Orion laughs as he raises Inge by the throat watching as  he struggles for breath. As his gasps for air, Inge reaches behind his back, and grabs his trust baseball bat, filed into a spike. He drives the stake into Orion's heart,  and gasps for air as he is released when Orion explodes. He starts to look for his ring when he sees a familiar face.

"Oh! Hey there..." but Inge is unable to finish his sentance when the LMD designate Crusader punches through his skull. Fueled by the power of the red gem.  Crusader grabs Inge's green ring, adding it to the already impressive collection of weaponry and infinity gems it's amassed.

Frehley is snapped out of his trance when he sees what's transpired

"I gotta warn the other Horsemen." Ace attempts to alert the others when Gene Simmons appears in from of him, holding a green ring. He thrusts it into his chest.

"This is the ring of our owner." Gene snarls, spitting demonfire. "Weren't you supposed to have his back?"

"But Gene...I was...I saw.. you see" stammers Ace, when his communicator begins to crackle, but Ace can't hear it over the Demonic voice of Gene Simmons

"Save it. You're outta the band. You're no longer the Celestial. Give me your harness and powers"

"But..Gene..this is.... are you even.."

"NOW!" 

Ace's bottom lip begins to tremble as he unclasps his gear. He begins to focus he powers into the tradional make up he wears, when Gene's head explodes and Paul Stanley flies in. 

"PAUL??" asks Ace

"Yeah, Ace. You almost gave up your power to a robot. Maybe he had the right idea." says Paul Stanley.

"But Paul...I gotta tell you.." stammers Ace as his radio continues to crackle

Paul backhands Ace across the face and grabs him by the throat.

"Do you know what's happened? Not only is Poteracki dead, but so is Optimus. He took down the prime pretender Alleta, when the Matrix left her and returned to him, but Kingdom Come Superman put him down. I don't know what happened to Vader, but we're in dire straights while you're out here doing jacks**t with your gifts. The Starchild saved you once already. Let me do what I do best and show why KISS is the hottest band in the world!" 

"Yeah Paul. Ok." says Ace meekly as he gives the power of the Space Ace to Paul Stanley and reverts back to Paul Frehley. Paul begins to choke on the lack of oxygen, as he no longer can survive in space. He hits the emergency button in his comm and it activates an emergency oxygen supply and a homing beacon.
 
"Idiot." says the Celestial Star Child as he turns his attention to the Death Star.
 He grabs the massive space station as Frehley finally hears what his comm was saying
 
"I have taken command of the Death Star and have it aimed at the RAMA and Thanos. I await your command to fire, Ace" says the voice of Darth Vader
 
Ace's eyes widen in horror as the Death Star is crushed before his eyes. The fiery blast causes "Paul" to lose his focus and he reverts back to the form of the Martian Manhunter, but he still retains the power of the Celestial. A bit of wreckage hits Ace right in the chest, literally finishing the heartbreak that his incompetence started. 
 
The Manhunter's victory is short lived, as he feels a tap on his shoulder.
 
Superman stands in front of him and snaps his neck before J'Onn can think.
 
"I've had enough of you bastard Commandos and your trickery. Let's finish this." and he heads off to the Ark for the final confrontation.

3 comments:

Krisatu said...

to be concluded...

Lickolas said...

Dude, that was the best one yet!

Ryan said...

Oh man...