Built Ford Tough Vs. The Untouchables

Built Ford Tough is Blue Beetle, Ford Prefect, Zaffrod Beezlebrock, Marvin the Paranoid Android, & Trillian, Han Solo & Jeff Houslander in a Hovercraft, Darkwing Duck, Capt. Jack Harkness, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato, Ianto Jones, Dr. Who, Power Man, Iron Fist, Archie the Octospider, Cookies, Steve McQueen, Keith Mars, Veronica Mars, Weevil, Wilt, Star Sapphire, Moltar, Joey, Pacy, Dawson, The Beatles: John , Paul, George, & Ringo, Mr. T, Ellie, Katie, Simone, & Benjy, Grimace, Gigantor, Despotellis, Nom Anor, Mandalorian #6-10, Fantastic Max, FX, & AB, Smoky the Bear, Beta Ray Bill, Dr. Seth Brundel, & Arachnid #1-34.

The Untouchables are Aphrodite, The Sorceress of Castle Grayskull, The Insecticons: Bombshell, Kickback, & Shrapnel, The Pretender Monsters: Birdbrain, Scowl, Bristleback, Icepick, Slog, & Wildfly, The Protectobots: Hot Spot, Groove, First Aid, Blades, & Streetwise, Dr. Polaris, Tomar Tu, Sodom Yat, Pounce & Wingspan, Siryn, Navy SEAL #33-44, Navy SEAL Chief Petty Officer #11-13, Broadside, The Legion of Super Heroes: Cosmic Boy, Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Phantom Girl, Bouncing Boy, Triplicate Girl, Timber Wolf, Chameleon Boy, & Karate Kid, Eclipso, Odysseus, Onslaught, Guy Gardner (w/ Green & Red Rings), The Burger King, Ben Tennyson, Gwen Tennyson, & Grandpa Max, Emperor Han, Katara the Water Bender, Ursula, The W.I.L.D.C.A.T.S.: Spartan, Voodoo, Grifter, Maul, Zealot, Warblade, & Lord Emp, Kung Lao, Slippy Toad, & Captain Cold.


Except for a handful of flyers and adept water dwellers, the entire Untouchable squad is on the deck of Broadside who is transformed into his aircraft carrier form. The vast majority of The Built Ford Tough squad are simply struggling to keep their heads above the rough water. Smoky the Bear sees the vast waters around him and realizes that there may actually be something in the universe better than stopping forest fires. Sadly this revelation kills him. AB keeps Fantastic Max’s head above the water, but , Max sees a floating twig and grabs a hold of it. He shows it to FX who screams “Rock & Roll” and turns it in to a boat for the 3 of them. ..........Grimace sinks because he’s stupid.............. The Untouchables have such an enormous advantage because of Broadside that they actually do not even know how to begin picking off The “Bill” Ford Tough squad. Cosmic Boy, Voodoo, & Dr. Polaris get in a contest of sorts and begin using their magnetic powers to take out as many characters as possible. Onslaught seems apathetic to such things and simply ignores this. The 3 metal controllers attack so quickly, that I as a Watcher was actually unable to tell who was killing who. Basically any characters with metal are affected. Blue Beetle, Marvin, Moltar, The Beatles (because they were all riding in their yellow sub-marine), AB, Mr. T (ya know, the jewelry), Gigantor, & The Mandalorians are all destroyed. The Built Ford Tough squad is at a loss as to what to do next, while The Untouchables are cheering aboard Broadside at how close to victory they already are. Onslaught is now slightly enraged at the attention these lesser manipulators of metal are receiving and decides that now after all he does feel like participating although now all of the major metal targets have been used up. This angers Onslaught who turns his head and sees his buddies The Pretender Monsters who are already waving their hands and shaking their heads NO at the powerful mutant. Lord Emp looks at Emperor Han and says: “Well, it worked good last week”, as Onslaught uses his powers to rip all 6 of his teammates the Pretender Monsters to shards and use them as weapons against the Ford Boys below. This attack kills every other “sitting duck” that BFT had to offer. Ford Prefect, Zaffrod Beezlebrock, Trillian, Capt. Jack Harkness, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato, Ianto Jones, Dr. Who, Power Man, Iron Fist (who are holding on to each other for dear life (but still ain’t gay)), Archie, Cookies, Steve McQueen, Keith & Veronica Mars, Weevil, Wilt, Joey, Pacy, Dawson, Ellie, Katie, Simone, Benjy, Nom Anor, Fantastic Max, FX, Dr. Seth Brundel, & all 34 Arachnids are destroyed within minutes by this amazing display of power from Onslaught. Beta Ray Bill, Star Sapphire, & Despotellis take to the air but Beta Ray Bill is by Guy Gardner, Jet Ray (Ben 10), Lightning Lad, & Cosmic Boy and is defeated with only killing Lightning Lad. Star Sapphire is quadruple teamed as well by Sodom Yat & The Insecticons. Star Sapphire takes out Shrapnel, but is quickly killed by the rest of his mini-squad. Despotellis is a little hard to find, but once he is he is destroyed by the quartet of Cosmic Boy, Phantom Girl, Siryn, & Tomar Tu. Darkwing Duck was able to dive below the surface to avoid Onslaught’s attack, but is attacked and killed by Ursula & Katara. At this point Han Solo turns to Jeff and says “What the hell is going on here? I’ve had about enough of this crap. Chewie dies last week, and now here I am on a damn water planet watching my team get wasted in record time. I’ll tell you what, screw the Untouchables and screw this whole league”. “My sentiments exactly” adds Jeff. Han then whips the hovercraft around and starts moving to the back of Broadside. “What’s the plan Han ol’ buddy” Jeff says. Han answers with: “I don’t know much about these Transformers, but I got to imagine that this is Broadside’s backside; and I plan to drive this hovercraft right up his A**”. Han then finishes with: “Are you with me buddy”? Jeff then screams at the top of his lungs right as they are about to crash: “NOW THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKIN...........(PAUSE).........ABOUT”! This action, which is the closest thing to an attack that Built Ford Tough has attempted all day sure enough blows up Broadside and sends The Untouchables into the water. Most aboard are fine, but Navy SEAL #33 & 34, Slippy Toad, The Burger King, Timber Wolf, Chameleon Boy, &
Warblade all perish in the mayhem.
THE UNTOUCHABLES ARE VICTORIOUS!