The Untouchables vs. The Abomitrons

“The mystery of life isn't a problem to solve, but a reality to experience."
-Frank Herbert (Dune-Rev. Mother Mohiam)

I look to the teams during this Week 7 Match on Scorched Planet Wallach IX. They are as follows:

The Untouchables: The Legion of Super Heroes- Cosmic Boy, Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Phantom Girl, Bouncing Boy, Triplicate Girl, Timber Wolf, Karate Kid and Brainiac 5, Onslaught, Dust, Pyro, Prof. McGonagall, Cad Bane, Sodom Yat, Red Lantern Guy Gardner, Maestro, Emperor Han, She-Hulk, Ant Man and Fremen #43-54.

The Abomitrons: Cyborg Superman, Capt. America on his motorcycle, Yaddle w/ Jedi Padawan #33, Blade, Hancock, Underdog, Cerberus, Cyborg in an Ornithopter, Abin Sur, Commander Cody w/ Kyle Houslander, Zachary Houslander and Bucky in a Seismic Tank, Capt. Rex w/ Phineas, Ferb and Perry in a Seismic Tank, Spider-Boy in Spiderman's helicopter, Falco in Tiger Heli, Mara Jade in Tiger Heli Helper #1, Robin (Dick Grayson) in Tiger Heli Helper #2, Ultra Boy, Stryfe, Motaro, Iron Monger (Obadiah Stain), The Ben 10 Alien Force- Ben Tennyson, Gwen Tennyson and Kevin, Zombie Tails, Zombie Scooby Dumb and Jason Voorhees' mother.

The Ben 10 Alien Force- Ben Tennyson, Gwen Tennyson and Kevin face Cad Bane.

Bane: I got real business; how ‘bout you kids step aside?

Ben 10 does not step aside. Gwen uses her magical aura to encase Bane. Bane fires his weapon and Kevin absorbs the energy. Kevin fires the weapon’s force back at Bane. Bane’s hand is hit and he drops his blaster. Ben jumps on Bane and uses the Omnitrix to transform into a super powered alien. Ben pummels Bane, and with the assistance of Gwen and Kevin, dispels with the bounty hunter. They then locate Brainiac 5. Although Brainiac 5 is incredibly intelligent, his brain power is no match for the brute physical force of the Ben 10 trio.

Fremen #43-54 meet Stryfe, Motaro and Iron Monger. The Fremen are neither able to destroy Stryfe, nor Iron Monger due to their armor. Stryfe and Iron Monger take advantage of this and use their powers to destroy Fremen #43-49. Motaro is overwhelmed by Fremen #50-54. Although he manages to kill Fremen #50 and 54, he falls in the process. The remaining Fremen #51-53 are destroyed by Stryfe and Iron Monger.

Jason Voorhees’ mother sees a cat cross her path. She realizes the oddity of this event, but ignores it anyway due to her mental illness and longing for her lost son. The cat transforms into Professor McGonagall, who immediately unleashes the powers of her wand to kill Voorhees. After dispelling with Voorhees, she transforms back into a cat. McGonagall believes that she will be able to move easier in the desert area in this guise. She does not move far as Cerberus pounces upon McGonagall and tears her apart.

Captain America sees a young Arabic girl and his patriotic juices flow due to racial profiling. He barrels into her with his motorcycle. Captain America throws his shield at her and she turns into dust. Dust begins to reform. Captain America jumps back on his motorcycle and motors toward Dust. Captain America jumps through Pyro’s flaming circle of death, but still fails to reach his objective as Red Lantern Guy Gardner grabs him with his ring’s powers and shoots both him and his bike into the sand. Captain America’s motorcycle explodes and the “symbol-of-America’s-goodness” breaks his neck.

Commander Cody with Kyle Houslander, Zachary Houslander and Bucky in a Seismic Tank and Capt. Rex with Phineas, Ferb and Perry in a Seismic Tank simultaneously eject their pistons onto the sands below. The seismic shockwaves throw both Maestro and She-Hulk across the dunes. The two hulking characters are momentarily startled, but eventually shrug off the effects. They jump on the Seismic Tanks and rip off the hatches. They each jump into their targeted Tanks. The tattered bodies of Captain Rex, Phineas, Ferb and Perry are thrown out of the tank which She-Hulk entered. The green goddess smiles and jumps out of the tank. Out of the other Seismic Tank fly the bodies of Bucky and Commander Cody. Zachary and Kyle Houslander are not seen being thrown from the tank, but it is surmised that they have also fallen to Maestro. The tank comes to a halt and Maestro jumps out. As She-Hulk and Maestro reach the ground they are confronted by Hancock, Cyborg Superman and Underdog.

Underdog: It's not a bird, or a plane, or even frog. It's just little old me, Underdog.

Before Underdog can derive another witty saying, he is strangled by She-Hulk. Hancock, in response, kills She-Hulk. Cyborg Superman kills Maestro.

Zombie Scooby Dumb chomps on Ant Man. Ant Man flies through the zombie and with his weaponry, blasts through Dumb’s stomach. Zombie Scooby Dumb looks down to see his intestines littering the sand. While distracted, Bouncing Boy bounces behind Dumb, lands on his head and smashes it; Dumb dies. Bouncing Boy is then met by both Stryfe and Iron Monger, who rip the young superhero apart with their weapons.

Yaddle with Jedi Padawan #33 walk along the dunes. Jedi Padawan #33 shouts as he is killed by an unknown force. Yaddle, sensing a disturbance in the Force, throws his lightsaber in an arcing motion. The lightsaber is heard slicing through an invisible object. Phantom Girl becomes tangible and is seen lying on the ground in two pieces.

Zombie Tails shambles through the sand. He is met by Pyro, who torches the zombie. Saturn Girl attempts to control Zombie Tails, but is unable to since her telepathy does not work on the living dead. Zombie Tails jumps on Saturn Girl; she bursts into flames and dies. Ant Man scuttles by and blasts Zombie Tails’ head off.

Triplicate Girl runs from Falco in Tiger Heli, Mara Jade in Tiger Heli Helper #1 and Robin (Dick Grayson) in Tiger Heli Helper #2. Triplicate Girl replicates to avoid being killed and increase her chances of surviving. She is not successful as each Tiger Heli and Helper destroys one of the three beings; Triplicate Girl dies.

Karate Kid faces Blade.

Karate Kid: So you’re a vampire, huh?

Blade: I’m something else!

The manly acrobatics and masculine fighting skills of both fighters are somewhat erotic as the two are displayed for all to admire. Eventually, Blade manages to kill Karate Kid. While recovering from his wounds, Blade does not see Timber Wolf leap from behind and, with his claws out, slash apart Blade’s neck. Blade’s head falls to the ground and he bursts into dust. Ultra Boy flies by and kills Timber Wolf. Cosmic Boy and Lightning Lad combine forces to kill Ultra Boy. In response, Hancock and Cyber Superman kill both Cosmic Boy and Lightning Lad.

Emperor Han uses his abilities to shoot the sands at Cyborg in an Ornithopter. Cyborg loses control of the vehicle and crashes. Cyborg steps out of his craft and is engulfed by a vortex created by Han. The wind vortex sucks the air from Cyborg’s lungs. Han then shifts his vortex so that it sucks both Pyro’s flames and Dust’s sands into it. The fires burn the remaining air and, with the vicious sands repeatedly entering into Cyborg’s body, Cyborg dies. Yaddle comes to the scene and slices Emperor Han in half. Stryfe arrives and kills Dust. Spider-Boy in Spiderman's helicopter flies at Pyro. Pyro is unable to react in time and the helicopter decapitates Pyro. As Spider-Boy turns the helicopter around, he is faced with Sodom Yat and Red Lantern Guy Gardner. The lanterns easily dispel with both the helicopter and Spider-Boy. Red Lantern Guy Gardner flies away and Sodom Yat is confronted by Hancock, Cyborg Superman and Abin Sur. Although Yat manages to kill Hancock, he is eventually bested by both Abin Sur and Cyborg Superman

Onslaught has had enough and focuses on Cyborg Superman, Falco in Tiger Heli, Mara Jade in Tiger Heli Helper #1, Robin (Dick Grayson) in Tiger Heli Helper #2 and Iron Monger (Obadiah Stain), who are all currently flying at him. Onslaught uses his mutant and magnetism abilities to bring together all of the metallic components of his foes. Tiger Heli, Tiger Heli Helper #1 and Helper #2 crash together. Falco, Mara Jade and Robin escape before it is too late. Iron Monger is crushed in his own armor as the armor is scrunched in with the Heli and Helpers. Cyborg Superman is also ripped into the other machinery. In a final and fatalistic act, a near-dead Cyborg Superman steers the metallic combination into Onslaught and crashes into him. The magnetic, massive, metal mass skewers Onslaught. Cerberus walks behind a mortally wounded Onslaught, sniffs and bites his head off, armor and all.

Red Lantern Guy Gardner becomes enraged and plans to fight to the death. Ant Man quashes Gardner’s “wants” and explains to him the “needs” of the Untouchables’ team-fight another day-with one less Gardner death. Gardner uses his ring to pick up Ant Man and the two fly off.

They are seen flying away by both Kyle Houslander and Zachary Houslander, who climb from the Seismic Tank.

The Untouchables: Red Lantern Guy Gardner and Ant Man alive, but retreat.

The Abomitrons: Yaddle, Cerberus, Abin Sur, Kyle Houslander, Zachary Houslander, Falco, Mara Jade, Robin (Dick Grayson), Stryfe, The Ben 10 Alien Force-Ben Tennyson, Gwen Tennyson and Kevin all survive.

THE ABOMITRONS ARE VICTORIOUS!!!