The Untouchables are Sodom Yat, Romat Ru, The Galaxy Trio: Vapor Man, Meteor Man, & Gravity Girl, Tomar Tu, The Fantastic Four: Mr. Fantastic, Invisible Woman, Human Torch & The Thing, Franklin Richards, Matt Oblak (w/ a red lightsaber), & Teresa Oblak in The Malevolence, Soranak Nat, Guy Gardner (w/ a red & green power ring), Ben Tennyson, Gwen Tennyson, Grandpa Max, The Legion of Super Heroes: Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Phantom Girl, Bouncing Boy, Triplicate Girl, Timber Wolf, Chameleon Boy, Karate Kid, & Cosmic Boy, Bodikka, Onslaught, Cad Bane, Aleta One, The Pretender Monsters: Birdbrain, Bristleback, Icepick, Scowl, Slog, & Wildfly, Slippy Toad in an Arwing, & Gree.
Oblivio is Sith Lord #17 & 18 (Darth Void & Darth Barren), Space Godzilla, Hawkeye, Gorax, Micah Jiett in a B-Wing, Prince Nuada, Mr. Wink, Golden Army Soldier #1 & 2, Darwin, Magma, Capt. Marvel, Black Dragon #8, Mon*Star & Yess Man in Sky-Runner, Vampire #99, Liet Kynes, Pardot Kynes, Liet Kynes Ghola, Griffin #17, Junkeon #25 & 26, & The Brotherhood of Evil: The Brain, Monsieur Mallah, Madam Rouge, Garguax, & General Immortus.
Mr. Fantastic orders his team to hang back at first so they can try and pick off some of Oblivio’s team at the very beginning and then surround and overwhelm what is left. Reed Richards and his scientific assistant Teresa Oblak know that Oblivio, being an expansion team could not have possibly built up a great space team yet and that they should do their best to take advantage of this. With this plan laid out, Mr. Fantastic orders his team to move quickly and sporadically so they can take out the lesser threats first without being caught in the middle of a major skirmish. Although The Brain & Monsieur Mallah have some plans of their own, and may not be as easily defeated as The Untouchables had hoped. Mon*Star is in command of The Sky Runner which is holding quite a few members of The Oblivio Team; but the ship is ripped apart by the amazing magnetic abilities of Onslaught. With the ship being destroyed, almost all of Oblivio is now free-floating in The Richey Mays like sitting ducks. Sodom Yat, Romat Ru, Tomar Tu, Guy Gardner, & Slippy Toad in his Arwing easily maneuver around the wreckage of The Sky Runner and target Hawkeye, The Gorax Monster, Yess-Man, Black Dragon #8, Garguax, Vampire #99, Liet Kynes, Pardot Kynes, & The Liet Kynes Ghola, & Griffin #17. Cosmic Boy then uses his own powers of magnetism to send Mr. Wink & The 2 Golden Army Soldiers on a collision course with not only each other, but also their master Prince Nuada, which kills them all while he is simultaneously crushing Mon*Star inside his own metal suit of armor. Cosmic Boy then uses the 2 Junkeons as enormous bullets to kill Magma and to try and take out Micah Jiett in his B-Wing, but the Jedi Master is able to evade (for now). Magma was not so lucky. this match, as far as The Fantastic Four and The Oblaks are concerned is the exact kind of a** kicking that they were hoping for, but what they don’t realize is that Darwin, who has basically evolved into a human rocket has one by one carried The Brain, Mallah, Rouge, Immortus, & The Sith Lords to an uncharted air lock on the back of The Malevolence that The Brain calculated must exist for the ship’s hyper drive motor’s to function properly. While this is going on Space Godzilla, Jedi Master Micah Jiett in his B-Wing, & Capt Marvel have all fallen back to make their final space stand. Darth Void orders her apprentice Lord Barren to use his lightsaber to cut the hole they need to get inside The Malevolence and mount their surprise attack. The Brain knows that even this well thought out plan is a long shot, but now that they are inside the remaining Brotherhood of Evil members, the 2 Sith Lords, & Darwin are no force to be scoffed at, now that they won’t have to do their fighting in the middle of space. Outside the ship, The Untouchables #1 pick for Season 3: Sodom Yat leads Romat Ru, Vapor Man, Meteor Man, Gravity Girl, Tomar Tu, Soranik Natu, Guy Gardner, Ben Tennyson (as Jetray), Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Phantom Girl, Cosmic Boy, Boodikka, Onslaught, Aleta One, The Pretender Monsters, & Slippy Toad against Space Godzilla, Micah Jiett, & Capt. Marvel. Once the Oblivio land lubbers are inside the ship Gen. Immortus takes over command due to his skill with military tactics. They first sneak up on Gree, who Madam Rouge easily kills without making a sound by wrapping her legs around his neck to strangle him. The Brain, Mallah, & Immortus have all come to the same conclusion that The Fantastic Four and The Oblaks will most likely be found on the bridge, so they decide that they will save that fight for last and take out the rest of the crew before they can be alerted to help out the FF/Oblak Command crew. They stumble on a recreational type room where they find Cad Bane, Timber Wolf, Chameleon Boy, Karate Kid, Gwen, and Grandpa Max hanging out, awaiting orders, and telling old war stories to pass the time. Immortus uses the power of surprise as they all jump in to action to take The Untouchables off guard. The Sith Lords easily take out Chameleon Boy and the young Gwen, but once this happens The Untouchables jump into a defensive posture. Karate Kid makes a move toward The Brain and easily kicks open the jar to kill The Oblivio leader, but unfortunately for The Untouchables The Brain’s job was already done. Cad Bane dodges the attacks of both of the Sith Lords and then manages to put a perfectly placed blaster bolt into the forehead of Darth Barren. Cad Bane is then defeated when he is tripped up by Rouge and then finished off by the feminine grace and lightsaber mastery of Darth Void. Grandpa Max puts up a good fight, but is eventually taken out by Monsieur Mallah. All 3 parts of Triplicate Girl are no match for Darwin, who can now be 3 places at once to kill them simultaneously. Mallah then stomps Timber Wolf to death, while Madam Rouge throws Darth Void into Karate Kid with her lightsaber out like a spear, while she is engulfing Bouncing Boy in her grip to kill him. Reed Richards and his crew are now alerted to the presence of Oblivio on their ship, but it is to late for them to do anything but get ready for the fight. Mallah doesn’t need to look at his watch to find out that it’s “Clobberin Time” from The Thing who puts his orange rock fist thru the Ape’s head. Madam Rouge gets in the obvious fight with Mr. Fantastic, while Darth Void Sith Lightnings the crap out of Invisible Woman before she can put up a proper invisashield. Teresa and The Human Torch rush over to help out their buddy Reed, but it is to late, because Madam Rouge has already delivered a killing blow to Reed’s throat while he left it unprotected for only a split second. Rouge then tries to attack Human Torch, but she quickly finds out that even she can’t lay a hand on him without it burning her expandable skin. Gen Immortus takes his staff and knocks down Teresa, but Matt rushes over with his red lightsaber and takes Immortus’ crusty old head straight off. Darth Void is about to start a lightsaber duel with Matt, who is scared out of his mind but steps up to the challenge. Lucky for Matt Human Torch bails him out and torches Lord Void before the duel can take place. Franklin Richards then uses his powers to teleport Madam Rouge into a supernova somewhere, which as you may have guessed kills her. Back in space Micah Jiett managed to beat Slippy Toad in a dog fight but Cosmic Boy popped up to stop Jiett’s B-Wing in place and then break it in half. Micah Jiett, then in a daring move pulls out both his lightsabers and jumps out of the exploding to stab them both into the chest of Cosmic Boy, right before the Jedi is crushed by a green energy hand from Boodikka. Space Godzilla manages to take out Aleta One, Soranak Natu, Saturn Girl, & Lightning Lad before this match begins to grow tiresome for Onslaught who uses his mind to crumple his own teammate Monstructor into a ball and fire him thru the chest of Space Godzilla. Capt. Marvel takes out Vapor Man & Gravity Girl, but before he can do any more damage he is overwhelmed by the threesome of Sodom Yat, Tomar Tu, & Guy Gardner.
THE UNTOUCHABLES ARE VICTORIOUS!
Monday, March 29, 2010
Le' Napoleon Brigade Vs. Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies
Le' Napoleon Brigade is (Golden Age) Wonder Woman in her Invisible Jet, Jetfire & Jetstorm, Jania Solo in a Tie Bomber, Stass Allie in a Tie Interceptor, Red Lantern #3, Skyfire, Alan Scott, Silver Dragon #4-9, Guy Gardner (w/ yellow power ring), Black Hand, Yoda's spirit, Anakin Solo in Darth Vader's Tie Fighter, Coleman Trebor in a Tie Bomber, Darth Nihilus & Emperor Palpatine in a Snow Speeder, Obi Wan Kenobi, Even Piel in a Tie Bomber, Hecate, The Jettsons: George, Jane, Judy, Elroy, Astro, Rosey, & Orbitty, Jedi Master #31 & 32, & Skeletor's Crack Troopers #1 & 2.
Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies are Forge, Hellboy, Etrigan the Demon, Lobo, Guy Gardner & G'Nort, Booster Gold, Kyle Rayner, Mecha Godzilla, The Power Puff Girls: Bubbles, Blossom, & Buttercup, The Technobots: Scattershot, Lightspeed, Strafe, Nosecone, & Afterburner, Starro, Grimlock, Lobo the Duck (w/ an Atlas), Dynomutt, The Great Lakes Avengers: Mr. Immortal, Squirrel Girl, Big Bertha, & Flatman, Shazam, Hawkman & Hawkwoman, Dobby, Clone Trooper #26-31, The Mighty Morphing Power Rangers: Jason, Zack, Billy, Trini, & Kimberly, & Ewok #6 & 7.
Wonder Woman speaks to her troops and says: “My daughter has informed me that last season, before I was part of this team that the team we are about to face disgraced The Brigade by sending only 1 old woman out to meet us in battle in the biggest match of the year, and that our blood debt against them will never end as long as there are Amazons among our ranks. Meanwhile on a floating asteroid in the distance is The Murderflies, who wait for their opponents arrival. Squirrel Girl turns to one of her new BFF’s Kimberly the Pink Ranger and asks: “Is it true that the team we are about to fight just busted in to our locker room last season and just slaughtered basically the whole team for no reason“? “Yeah, that about sums it up”. Kimberly replies. As The Brigade approaches the Murderfly fortified asteroid, most of the non-flyers are already inside vehicles of their own control, but Jedi Master #31 & 32 are riding inside Jetfire, while the 2 Skeletor Troops are inside Jetstorm, and Obi Wan and the Jettsons are in Skyfire. Wonder Woman sends the Silver Dragons in as the first wave, but they are not able to do much in the space’s vacuum and are destroyed rather easily by Mecha Godzilla and Starro. Wonder Woman did not have particularly high hopes for what the Silver Dragons were going to accomplish, but she did hope that it would be more than they did. Next up is Stass Allie in a Tie Interceptor leading the trio of Force powered Tie Bomber pilots. The 4 pilots fly in to attack Mecha Godzilla and seem to know exactly where to hit him with their Turbo lasers and Advanced Missiles. They then do the same to Starro, and take out the 2 Murderfly giants with relative ease. Perhaps it is their force enhanced flying ability, or perhaps it is their mental link with the Jedi Master Yoda who is now one with the force and able to speak to them freely thru minimal concentration from the living Jedis. Allan Scott and Guy Gardner square off against Kyle Rayner and Guy Gardner; but before they begin battling, they banter about the one obvious subject that these 4 would discuss....... How much better Hal Jordan is than they are. The fight then begins, but we’ll come back to that later. “I wish that we could avoid, just waiting on this asteroid. Because I see the approach of a parade and I fear it is our enemies Brigade”. Etrigan says to the Atlas wielding Lobo the Duck. Just then Skyfire, Jetfire, & Jetstorm all land on the asteroid and transform, but not before they release their passengers, whom are all ready to do battle. Obi Wan Kenobi leads the charge. Etrigan kills both of the Skeletor Troopers and says: “I must say your black costume I do adore even though I knock you to this rock floor, I know death is what you’re prepared for if training you did with Skeletor”. The rhyming Etrigan is then double-teamed and killed by the 2 Jedi Masters. His last words are: “I feel as though I’ve been done a favor with a painless death by the lightsaber”. Darth Nihilus is flying the Snow Speeder with Palpatine as his gunner when Hellboy leaps into the air and punches a hole in the bottom of the ship. The Snow Speeder crash lands but both Sith Lords jump out onto the asteroid. Sidious and Nihilus then both ignite their crimson lightsabers and easily wipe out the 6 Clone Troopers before they move against The Great Lakes Avengers. The 2 of them use their lightsabers to make short work of Flatman and Big Bertha, but Palpatine has to resort to some majorly potent Sith Lightning in order to fry Mr. Immortal to death (I know Goofjuice, he’s “Mr. Immortal” and he just died again........ Start dealing with it). But Squirrel Girl uses her enhanced agility to dodge the attacks of Darth Nihilus and then slice open his neck with her claws. Squirrel Girl unfortunately stands victorious for only a few seconds as she is then killed by a lightsaber sneak attack from Palpatine. Now for the space battle you have all been waiting for, the brawl to settle it all Astro vs. Dynomutt. The 2 dogs battle it out for a significant amount of time before Dynomutt gets an upper hand in the battle and bites Astro’s jugular. Rosey the Robot then gets revenge on Dynomutt by taking out one of her kitchen knives to finish off the poor dog, serial killer style. Wonder Woman and Anakin Solo go on a strafing run of the asteroid and take out Forge, Dobby, Booster Gold, and both Ewoks who were sitting ducks from their “fly by” vantage point. The Power Rangers are just fighting with their multi-colored weapons when they see Hecate flying up and begin there chant: “Mastodon, Pterodactyl, Triceratops, Saber tooth Tiger, TYRRANOSAURUS”. To call upon the mighty Mega-Zord, who is then backed up by the Technobots, who merge to form Computron, who states that Hecate only has a 30% chance to defeat both of the metal giants. The lost Titan then defies these odds as she uses her huge mounted lasguns to blast both The Mega-Zord and Computron back to 7:00 AM before school where they belong. Hecate then follows this attack up with a couple of missiles that take out Hellboy before Shazam appears before the massive Cymek and then drills a hole right thru her using his own body as the drill bit. As Shazam comes out the other side he notices a bit of the brain matter floating away that was the only human part remaining in the huge machine construct. Lobo the Duck uses his Atlas and Lobo uses his fist to put matching holes in the chests of Jedi Masters #31 & 32, but Obi Wan avenges them by force pushing Lobo the Duck out of the way and then cutting Lobo in half with his lightsaber. Lobo the Duck is floating away in space, after being force pushed into the air but Skyfire targets him with his lasers to take him out. Jetfire and Jetstorm merge to form Firestorm and then take out both Hawkman and Hawkwoman who had just gotten done murdering the Jettsons, Rosey, & Orbitty. Jetstorm then moves against Grimlock but they are blessed with hearing the words: “Me Grimlock crush planes” in their last moments. Black Hand is attacked by The Power Puff Girls, but he manages to grab Bubbles by the neck and rip her head off. Buttercup then goes off on Black Hand and hits him with a double fisted punch that sends him flying into the distance. Buttercup then catches up to Black Hand before he can right himself and hits him so hard that he is completely blown apart. Blossom gets separated from Buttercup and meets up with Obi Wan Kenobi, but the Jedi Master leaps into the space around him and slices Blossom in half. Buttercup on the other hand blasts thru Jania Solo’s Tie Bomber to destroy both the ship and the pilot. She then attacks Wonder Woman in her Invisible Jet and causes enough damage that Wonder Woman actually has to eject from the plane. Wonder Woman ejects out and then grabs Buttercup and wrestles her down to the asteroid. Buttercup gets in some massive hits, but in the end Wonder Woman comes out on top and finally ends the Power Puff Girl’s reign of terror. Grimlock uses his mouth laser to shoot down Even Piell’s Tie Bomber but the Jedi Master manages to eject safely. He then rendezvous with Obi Wan Kenobi. The 2 are about to rush into an attack on the much larger Grimlock when they hear the voice of Master Yoda. Yoda tells them to be patient and has them wait until the perfect moment. They meditate on this for a couple of moments and then come out of their near-trance like state and both throw their lightsabers directly into the mouth of Grimlock. These throws land perfectly to and extinguish Grimlock’s spark. Yellow Guy Gardner attacks G’Nort and completely obliterates him. He follows it up with: “I kind of always wanted to do that”, but Green Guy Gardner flies up yelling: “Hey if anybody was supposed to kill G’Nort it was me”. “I am you” the yellow Gardner replies as he blasts Green Guy with his ring. “The only difference is, my ring can hurt yours, but your ring can’t do anything to me”. “Yeah I keep hearing that” Green Gardner says as he uses his green ring to take control of Coleman Trebor’s Tie Bomber and sends it on a collision course with the Yellow Guy Gardner, causing quite a large explosion. Kyle Rayner and Alan Scott have been going at it one on one since the start of this match, but Alan Scott finally gains the upper hand. I guess in the end it is experience that wins out as the exhausted original Green Lantern sends a green spear thru the chest of Rayner. Shazam battles with Red Lantern #3 who unleashes an enormous amount of rage fueled energy on Capt. Marvel. But the magical-powered being known as Shazam is able to take the hit an then dish out a punch that takes the red lantern out for good. Guy Gardner flies in to back up Shazam but they find themselves surrounded by (the Yoda spirit guided) Wonder Woman, Stass Allie, Skyfire, Alan Scott, Anakin Solo, Emperor Palpatine, Obi Wan Kenobi, & Even Piel. The 2 DC heroes make their last stand together with Shazam taking out Stass Allie & Gardner taking out Anakin Solo before they succumb to the overwhelming odds.
LE’ NAPOLEON BRIGADE IS VICTORIOUS!
Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies are Forge, Hellboy, Etrigan the Demon, Lobo, Guy Gardner & G'Nort, Booster Gold, Kyle Rayner, Mecha Godzilla, The Power Puff Girls: Bubbles, Blossom, & Buttercup, The Technobots: Scattershot, Lightspeed, Strafe, Nosecone, & Afterburner, Starro, Grimlock, Lobo the Duck (w/ an Atlas), Dynomutt, The Great Lakes Avengers: Mr. Immortal, Squirrel Girl, Big Bertha, & Flatman, Shazam, Hawkman & Hawkwoman, Dobby, Clone Trooper #26-31, The Mighty Morphing Power Rangers: Jason, Zack, Billy, Trini, & Kimberly, & Ewok #6 & 7.
Wonder Woman speaks to her troops and says: “My daughter has informed me that last season, before I was part of this team that the team we are about to face disgraced The Brigade by sending only 1 old woman out to meet us in battle in the biggest match of the year, and that our blood debt against them will never end as long as there are Amazons among our ranks. Meanwhile on a floating asteroid in the distance is The Murderflies, who wait for their opponents arrival. Squirrel Girl turns to one of her new BFF’s Kimberly the Pink Ranger and asks: “Is it true that the team we are about to fight just busted in to our locker room last season and just slaughtered basically the whole team for no reason“? “Yeah, that about sums it up”. Kimberly replies. As The Brigade approaches the Murderfly fortified asteroid, most of the non-flyers are already inside vehicles of their own control, but Jedi Master #31 & 32 are riding inside Jetfire, while the 2 Skeletor Troops are inside Jetstorm, and Obi Wan and the Jettsons are in Skyfire. Wonder Woman sends the Silver Dragons in as the first wave, but they are not able to do much in the space’s vacuum and are destroyed rather easily by Mecha Godzilla and Starro. Wonder Woman did not have particularly high hopes for what the Silver Dragons were going to accomplish, but she did hope that it would be more than they did. Next up is Stass Allie in a Tie Interceptor leading the trio of Force powered Tie Bomber pilots. The 4 pilots fly in to attack Mecha Godzilla and seem to know exactly where to hit him with their Turbo lasers and Advanced Missiles. They then do the same to Starro, and take out the 2 Murderfly giants with relative ease. Perhaps it is their force enhanced flying ability, or perhaps it is their mental link with the Jedi Master Yoda who is now one with the force and able to speak to them freely thru minimal concentration from the living Jedis. Allan Scott and Guy Gardner square off against Kyle Rayner and Guy Gardner; but before they begin battling, they banter about the one obvious subject that these 4 would discuss....... How much better Hal Jordan is than they are. The fight then begins, but we’ll come back to that later. “I wish that we could avoid, just waiting on this asteroid. Because I see the approach of a parade and I fear it is our enemies Brigade”. Etrigan says to the Atlas wielding Lobo the Duck. Just then Skyfire, Jetfire, & Jetstorm all land on the asteroid and transform, but not before they release their passengers, whom are all ready to do battle. Obi Wan Kenobi leads the charge. Etrigan kills both of the Skeletor Troopers and says: “I must say your black costume I do adore even though I knock you to this rock floor, I know death is what you’re prepared for if training you did with Skeletor”. The rhyming Etrigan is then double-teamed and killed by the 2 Jedi Masters. His last words are: “I feel as though I’ve been done a favor with a painless death by the lightsaber”. Darth Nihilus is flying the Snow Speeder with Palpatine as his gunner when Hellboy leaps into the air and punches a hole in the bottom of the ship. The Snow Speeder crash lands but both Sith Lords jump out onto the asteroid. Sidious and Nihilus then both ignite their crimson lightsabers and easily wipe out the 6 Clone Troopers before they move against The Great Lakes Avengers. The 2 of them use their lightsabers to make short work of Flatman and Big Bertha, but Palpatine has to resort to some majorly potent Sith Lightning in order to fry Mr. Immortal to death (I know Goofjuice, he’s “Mr. Immortal” and he just died again........ Start dealing with it). But Squirrel Girl uses her enhanced agility to dodge the attacks of Darth Nihilus and then slice open his neck with her claws. Squirrel Girl unfortunately stands victorious for only a few seconds as she is then killed by a lightsaber sneak attack from Palpatine. Now for the space battle you have all been waiting for, the brawl to settle it all Astro vs. Dynomutt. The 2 dogs battle it out for a significant amount of time before Dynomutt gets an upper hand in the battle and bites Astro’s jugular. Rosey the Robot then gets revenge on Dynomutt by taking out one of her kitchen knives to finish off the poor dog, serial killer style. Wonder Woman and Anakin Solo go on a strafing run of the asteroid and take out Forge, Dobby, Booster Gold, and both Ewoks who were sitting ducks from their “fly by” vantage point. The Power Rangers are just fighting with their multi-colored weapons when they see Hecate flying up and begin there chant: “Mastodon, Pterodactyl, Triceratops, Saber tooth Tiger, TYRRANOSAURUS”. To call upon the mighty Mega-Zord, who is then backed up by the Technobots, who merge to form Computron, who states that Hecate only has a 30% chance to defeat both of the metal giants. The lost Titan then defies these odds as she uses her huge mounted lasguns to blast both The Mega-Zord and Computron back to 7:00 AM before school where they belong. Hecate then follows this attack up with a couple of missiles that take out Hellboy before Shazam appears before the massive Cymek and then drills a hole right thru her using his own body as the drill bit. As Shazam comes out the other side he notices a bit of the brain matter floating away that was the only human part remaining in the huge machine construct. Lobo the Duck uses his Atlas and Lobo uses his fist to put matching holes in the chests of Jedi Masters #31 & 32, but Obi Wan avenges them by force pushing Lobo the Duck out of the way and then cutting Lobo in half with his lightsaber. Lobo the Duck is floating away in space, after being force pushed into the air but Skyfire targets him with his lasers to take him out. Jetfire and Jetstorm merge to form Firestorm and then take out both Hawkman and Hawkwoman who had just gotten done murdering the Jettsons, Rosey, & Orbitty. Jetstorm then moves against Grimlock but they are blessed with hearing the words: “Me Grimlock crush planes” in their last moments. Black Hand is attacked by The Power Puff Girls, but he manages to grab Bubbles by the neck and rip her head off. Buttercup then goes off on Black Hand and hits him with a double fisted punch that sends him flying into the distance. Buttercup then catches up to Black Hand before he can right himself and hits him so hard that he is completely blown apart. Blossom gets separated from Buttercup and meets up with Obi Wan Kenobi, but the Jedi Master leaps into the space around him and slices Blossom in half. Buttercup on the other hand blasts thru Jania Solo’s Tie Bomber to destroy both the ship and the pilot. She then attacks Wonder Woman in her Invisible Jet and causes enough damage that Wonder Woman actually has to eject from the plane. Wonder Woman ejects out and then grabs Buttercup and wrestles her down to the asteroid. Buttercup gets in some massive hits, but in the end Wonder Woman comes out on top and finally ends the Power Puff Girl’s reign of terror. Grimlock uses his mouth laser to shoot down Even Piell’s Tie Bomber but the Jedi Master manages to eject safely. He then rendezvous with Obi Wan Kenobi. The 2 are about to rush into an attack on the much larger Grimlock when they hear the voice of Master Yoda. Yoda tells them to be patient and has them wait until the perfect moment. They meditate on this for a couple of moments and then come out of their near-trance like state and both throw their lightsabers directly into the mouth of Grimlock. These throws land perfectly to and extinguish Grimlock’s spark. Yellow Guy Gardner attacks G’Nort and completely obliterates him. He follows it up with: “I kind of always wanted to do that”, but Green Guy Gardner flies up yelling: “Hey if anybody was supposed to kill G’Nort it was me”. “I am you” the yellow Gardner replies as he blasts Green Guy with his ring. “The only difference is, my ring can hurt yours, but your ring can’t do anything to me”. “Yeah I keep hearing that” Green Gardner says as he uses his green ring to take control of Coleman Trebor’s Tie Bomber and sends it on a collision course with the Yellow Guy Gardner, causing quite a large explosion. Kyle Rayner and Alan Scott have been going at it one on one since the start of this match, but Alan Scott finally gains the upper hand. I guess in the end it is experience that wins out as the exhausted original Green Lantern sends a green spear thru the chest of Rayner. Shazam battles with Red Lantern #3 who unleashes an enormous amount of rage fueled energy on Capt. Marvel. But the magical-powered being known as Shazam is able to take the hit an then dish out a punch that takes the red lantern out for good. Guy Gardner flies in to back up Shazam but they find themselves surrounded by (the Yoda spirit guided) Wonder Woman, Stass Allie, Skyfire, Alan Scott, Anakin Solo, Emperor Palpatine, Obi Wan Kenobi, & Even Piel. The 2 DC heroes make their last stand together with Shazam taking out Stass Allie & Gardner taking out Anakin Solo before they succumb to the overwhelming odds.
LE’ NAPOLEON BRIGADE IS VICTORIOUS!
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Former Pop Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos vs The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets
Former Pop Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos are Parallax, Bizarro, Black Adam, Dave Bowman: The Starchild, Numnius, Dex-tar, Karu-sil, Fatality, Taa, Zombie Darkseid In Rama: Rodimus Prime, Qui Gonn Jinn, Azeem, Ms. Marvel, Maxima,& Mary Marvel, On A Star Destroyer: Dr. Doom, Vorian Atreides, Bail Organa, Zombie Al Dogg, Ewok Baby #5, The Colonial Marines, & Ellen Ripley.
The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets are Aurra Sing & Magneto in The Talon Fighter, Asajj Ventress, Darth Yardigan, Count Dooku, Bill Kelly (w/ a Blue lightsaber), Norm Peterson, & Smurf #2 in The Outlaw, Quasar,/ Nightwing, Carlos Chiappe-Soto (w/ a green lightsaber), & R.O.B. the Robot in a Y-Wing Bomber/ Toad in the Mario 2 Spaceship, Omega Supreme, Air Zonk w/ Astra & Power Dump, Adam Warlock, Capt. Power & R4 Unit #1 in an A-Wing, Maj. Hawk Masterson & R4 Unit #2 in an A-Wing, Robert "Scout" Baker & R4 Unit #3 in an A-Wing, Aayla Secura & R2 Unit #3 in a Jedi V-Wing, Bultar Swan & R2 Unit #4 in a Jedi V-Wing, Ganthet & Sayd, Dr. U'bx in a Tie Bomber, Ch'p, Amantia, Larvox, Avian #1, Blue Lantern #1, Air Zimmell, & Vampire Cat #1
This battle waged on for so long that I am now just being able to report to but the mere highlights of this truly epic confrontation between these two divisional rivals.
Captain Power leads a squadron of A-Wings and Jedi V-Wings into battle. “We have to take that Star Destroyer out first team!” Capt. Power says over their intercoms. He’s flanked by Major “Hawk” Masterson and Sergeant Robert “Hawk” Baker, both in A-Wings. They are followed closely by Aayla Secura and Bultar Swan, both flying in Jedi V-Wings. Inside the Star Destroyer, Dr. Doom shouts his orders. “Colonial Marines! To your stations!” The Colonial Marines quickly run to their battle positions and begin to fire the Star Destroyer’s weapons at the oncoming attack. PFC Hudson clips Scout’s A-Wing and sends him careening into the side of the Star Destroyer. “Yeah! You like that?!” yells Hudson. Captain Power fires his laser cannons and kills Corp. Ferro and Corp. Dietrich with his shots. The A-Wings, known for their superior speed, whip by several times, doing several strafing runs in the process and killing Pvt. Frost, Pvt. Crowe, Pvt. Wierzbowski, and PFC Spunkmeyer. Aayla Secura and Bultar Swan target the command deck and begin their attack. Dr. Doom then calls upon his two enforcers to protect the command deck. Bizarro and Black Adam fly up and attack the two Jedi’s in their ships. The two powerhouses severely damage the ships, but both Jedi’s eject out of the cockpits and are rescued by Ganthet and Sayd. The two Oa Guardians help the Jedi’s get aboard the Star Destroyer, along with Nightwing, Vampire Cat #1 and Asajj Ventress. The five Brotherhood members rip though the ranks of the Colonial Marines, finishing off every last one of them, before reaching the command deck. Asajj Ventress leaps into action, killing both Bail Organa and Vorian Atreides with her dual lightsabers. She is then blasted into oblivion by Dr. Doom vast magical powers. Vampire Cat #1 quickly attacks Ewok Baby #5 and savagely kills it. Nightwing is about to move into action, but is tackled to the ground by Zombie Al Dogg. “The Man Who Just Can’t Stay Buried” bites into Nightwings neck, but is quickly kicked off. Vampire Cat #1 then leaps onto Al Dogg and starts clawing at him. Decomposing flesh fly through the air, but Zombie Al Dogg is able to eat the Vampire Cat. Nightwing finishes off Zombie Al Dogg, moments before he himself perishes. Ellen Ripley then rushes in and dropkicks Bultar Swan. She pulls out a gun and fires several shots at the Jedi, but the bullets are deflected by her lightsaber. Bultar Swan then flips into the air and lops off Ripley’s head. The two Jedi’s then square off against Dr. Doom. The Jedi’s attack in unison, but Dr. Doom’s magic is not to be trifled with. He conjures up a magical blast that actually reacts extremely volatile with the lightsabers, causing the entire command deck to explode, killing all inside. Outside in space, the team of Bizarro, Black Adam, and Parallax are wreaking havoc on the Brotherhood’s squadron of ships. Black Adam has already destroyed the Outlaw, which was a feat in itself, considering its vast weaponry. Parallax killed Carlos Chiappe-Soto and R.O.B. the Robot, who were in a Y-Wing Bomber. Bizarro flies over and blasts through the Mario 2 Spaceship, which causes Toad to get sucked out of the hole and suffocate in outer space. “We must attack Rama,” says Magneto. “It’s our only chance at victory.” Then in probably one of his most impressive feats of his power, Magneto uses the now useless Star Destroyer as an enormous spear and launches it right into the side of Rama. It slams into the side of Rama, completely destroying “The Horns,” which brings Rama to a halt. Magneto then flies out of the Talon Fighter and rips another, but much smaller hole into the side of Rama, which allows Count Dooku, Darth Yardigan, and Bill Kelly to enter the massive metal cylinder. They proceed to search for the members of the Commandos within Rama. Outside, however, Zombie Darkseid is being attacked by Ganthet and Sayd. The two Oa Guardians are extremely powerful, but the Ruler of Apokolips who has risen from the grave is not easily beaten. He uses his Omega Beams to destroy the Oa Guardians, but the beams are too much for Zombie Darkseid to control and they cause his head to explode as well. Captain Power regroups with “Hawk” Masterson, Dr. U’bx in a Tie Bomber, Air Zonk, with Astra and Power Dump and Aurra Sing, who’s flying the Talon Fighter. They all then descend upon Numnius and begin attacking her. She does not want to harm these opponents but is reminded of what her sympathizing feelings with result in and reluctantly vaporizes the oncoming attackers. Back inside Rama, the Brotherhood group has located the Commando’s team, who are fortified inside “New York”. Count Dooku is the first to react, as he hits Rodimus Prime with a bolt of Sith Lightning that destroys the Autobot leader. Darth Yardigan follows in his master’s footsteps and kills Azeem in the same manner. Qui Gon Jinn then attacks Darth Yardigan and quickly avenges the death of his close friend, Azeem. He then finds himself face to face with his old master, Count Dooku. “I see your abilities have grown since the last we met, my old apprentice,” Dooku says. “I am saddened to see that you have fallen into the shroud of the Dark Side my master,” replies Qui Gon. Maxima, Mary Marvel and Ms. Marvel then all fly outside of Rama to lend a hand to the rest of their team as Qui Gon and Dooku square off.
They ignite their lightsabers and slowly begin to circle each other. Dooku is the first to attack, but Qui Gon does a superb job of defending the attack. He then Force pushes Dooku back, which Dooku retaliates with a blast of Sith Lightning. Master Jinn blocks it with his lightsaber. Count Dooku then uses the Force to throw several object at Qui Gon, but the Jedi Master barrel rolls out of the way. He then flips up into the air and attack the Sith Lord. Their lightsabers spark as they clash, the glow of red and green emit off of the blade onto the two combatants. Count Dooku, then scores the first hit, by wounding Qui Gon’s left arm. Qui Gon then returns the favor and cuts Dooku’s right hand off. Dooku tries to use his Sith Lightning again, but Qui Gon is able to turn it against the Count with his lightsaber. He then finally finishes his old master with and killing strike to the neck. Qui Gon falls to his knees in exhaustion, and lets out a sigh of relief. But unfortunately that relief is only for a brief moment. He hears another lightsaber being ignited, and turns to find Bill Kelly holding his blue lightsaber. “I’m very sorry Master Jinn,” Bill says reluctantly as he drives his lightsaber deep into Qui Gon’s abdomen. With his dying breath, Qui Gon replies, “I’m sorry too,” as he puts his lightsaber into Bill’s chest. Both of them crumple to the floor of Rama.
Outside in space, the battle rages on. The Brotherhood currently has their back up against the proverbial wall. Their ranks have dwindled down to Magneto, Quasar, Omega Supreme, Adam Warlock, Air Zimmell, Avian #1, Blue Lantern #1 and the trio of Green Lanterns; Ch’p, Amanita, and Larvox. The Green Lanterns waste no time in attacking Dex-Starr, Karu-Sil and Fatality. The Blue Lantern flies over and gives all the Green Lanterns a much needed power boost. Amanita uses her cosmic awareness to destroy Karu-Sil and her pack of yellow energy beasts. Blue Lantern #1 and Ch’p combine their forces to euthanize Dex-Starr as Larvox battles Fatality. The Star Sapphire is able to overcome the Green Lantern and kills Larvox. Taa takes the opportunity of the Blue Lantern in his vicinity and powers up his ring to take on Adam Warlock. But even with his ring on “Blue Lantern Steroids” Taa falls to the power of Adam Warlock. Ch’p, Amanita and Blue Lantern #1 surround Fatality and are about to finish her off, when Maxima flies in and rips the head off of Blue Lantern #1. She then uses her eye beams to kill Amanita. Mary Marvel flies in and lends a hand to Maxima by killing Ch’p. Maxima flies off straight at Omega Supreme. “Chance of defeating Omega… 2.7%” the giant Autobot bellows. “That’s all I need,” Maxima says as she flies head first into Omega’s chest. She then blasts back out of him and with all her might rips Omega Supreme’s head off. Magneto then uses the lifeless body of Omega to crush Maxima, sending her to the Fantasy Fantasy Graveyard. Quasar and Adam Warlock then team up to take on Ms. Marvel, who unfortunately for her is out-matched and succumbs to her opponents. Bizarro flies in and smashes both Air Zimmell and Avian #1 together, killing them both. Quasar, Adam Warlock and Magneto then band together to make one last stand. “I will handle this,” Magneto says. He then raises his hands and begins to concentrate heavily, so much so that his nose begins to bleed. Then in probably one of the most amazing things this Watcher has ever seen, Rama crushes in on itself and kills Numnius. However, this has left Magneto extremely weakened and open to an attack by Black Adam and Mary Marvel. Dave Bowman then finishes off the last two Brotherhood members with a cosmic blast that blinds this Watcher for a moment.
FORMER POP SUPERSTAR HANNAH MONTANA AND BARACK OBAMA’S “BEST OF BOTH WORLDS” TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDOS ARE VICTORIOUS!!
The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets are Aurra Sing & Magneto in The Talon Fighter, Asajj Ventress, Darth Yardigan, Count Dooku, Bill Kelly (w/ a Blue lightsaber), Norm Peterson, & Smurf #2 in The Outlaw, Quasar,/ Nightwing, Carlos Chiappe-Soto (w/ a green lightsaber), & R.O.B. the Robot in a Y-Wing Bomber/ Toad in the Mario 2 Spaceship, Omega Supreme, Air Zonk w/ Astra & Power Dump, Adam Warlock, Capt. Power & R4 Unit #1 in an A-Wing, Maj. Hawk Masterson & R4 Unit #2 in an A-Wing, Robert "Scout" Baker & R4 Unit #3 in an A-Wing, Aayla Secura & R2 Unit #3 in a Jedi V-Wing, Bultar Swan & R2 Unit #4 in a Jedi V-Wing, Ganthet & Sayd, Dr. U'bx in a Tie Bomber, Ch'p, Amantia, Larvox, Avian #1, Blue Lantern #1, Air Zimmell, & Vampire Cat #1
This battle waged on for so long that I am now just being able to report to but the mere highlights of this truly epic confrontation between these two divisional rivals.
Captain Power leads a squadron of A-Wings and Jedi V-Wings into battle. “We have to take that Star Destroyer out first team!” Capt. Power says over their intercoms. He’s flanked by Major “Hawk” Masterson and Sergeant Robert “Hawk” Baker, both in A-Wings. They are followed closely by Aayla Secura and Bultar Swan, both flying in Jedi V-Wings. Inside the Star Destroyer, Dr. Doom shouts his orders. “Colonial Marines! To your stations!” The Colonial Marines quickly run to their battle positions and begin to fire the Star Destroyer’s weapons at the oncoming attack. PFC Hudson clips Scout’s A-Wing and sends him careening into the side of the Star Destroyer. “Yeah! You like that?!” yells Hudson. Captain Power fires his laser cannons and kills Corp. Ferro and Corp. Dietrich with his shots. The A-Wings, known for their superior speed, whip by several times, doing several strafing runs in the process and killing Pvt. Frost, Pvt. Crowe, Pvt. Wierzbowski, and PFC Spunkmeyer. Aayla Secura and Bultar Swan target the command deck and begin their attack. Dr. Doom then calls upon his two enforcers to protect the command deck. Bizarro and Black Adam fly up and attack the two Jedi’s in their ships. The two powerhouses severely damage the ships, but both Jedi’s eject out of the cockpits and are rescued by Ganthet and Sayd. The two Oa Guardians help the Jedi’s get aboard the Star Destroyer, along with Nightwing, Vampire Cat #1 and Asajj Ventress. The five Brotherhood members rip though the ranks of the Colonial Marines, finishing off every last one of them, before reaching the command deck. Asajj Ventress leaps into action, killing both Bail Organa and Vorian Atreides with her dual lightsabers. She is then blasted into oblivion by Dr. Doom vast magical powers. Vampire Cat #1 quickly attacks Ewok Baby #5 and savagely kills it. Nightwing is about to move into action, but is tackled to the ground by Zombie Al Dogg. “The Man Who Just Can’t Stay Buried” bites into Nightwings neck, but is quickly kicked off. Vampire Cat #1 then leaps onto Al Dogg and starts clawing at him. Decomposing flesh fly through the air, but Zombie Al Dogg is able to eat the Vampire Cat. Nightwing finishes off Zombie Al Dogg, moments before he himself perishes. Ellen Ripley then rushes in and dropkicks Bultar Swan. She pulls out a gun and fires several shots at the Jedi, but the bullets are deflected by her lightsaber. Bultar Swan then flips into the air and lops off Ripley’s head. The two Jedi’s then square off against Dr. Doom. The Jedi’s attack in unison, but Dr. Doom’s magic is not to be trifled with. He conjures up a magical blast that actually reacts extremely volatile with the lightsabers, causing the entire command deck to explode, killing all inside. Outside in space, the team of Bizarro, Black Adam, and Parallax are wreaking havoc on the Brotherhood’s squadron of ships. Black Adam has already destroyed the Outlaw, which was a feat in itself, considering its vast weaponry. Parallax killed Carlos Chiappe-Soto and R.O.B. the Robot, who were in a Y-Wing Bomber. Bizarro flies over and blasts through the Mario 2 Spaceship, which causes Toad to get sucked out of the hole and suffocate in outer space. “We must attack Rama,” says Magneto. “It’s our only chance at victory.” Then in probably one of his most impressive feats of his power, Magneto uses the now useless Star Destroyer as an enormous spear and launches it right into the side of Rama. It slams into the side of Rama, completely destroying “The Horns,” which brings Rama to a halt. Magneto then flies out of the Talon Fighter and rips another, but much smaller hole into the side of Rama, which allows Count Dooku, Darth Yardigan, and Bill Kelly to enter the massive metal cylinder. They proceed to search for the members of the Commandos within Rama. Outside, however, Zombie Darkseid is being attacked by Ganthet and Sayd. The two Oa Guardians are extremely powerful, but the Ruler of Apokolips who has risen from the grave is not easily beaten. He uses his Omega Beams to destroy the Oa Guardians, but the beams are too much for Zombie Darkseid to control and they cause his head to explode as well. Captain Power regroups with “Hawk” Masterson, Dr. U’bx in a Tie Bomber, Air Zonk, with Astra and Power Dump and Aurra Sing, who’s flying the Talon Fighter. They all then descend upon Numnius and begin attacking her. She does not want to harm these opponents but is reminded of what her sympathizing feelings with result in and reluctantly vaporizes the oncoming attackers. Back inside Rama, the Brotherhood group has located the Commando’s team, who are fortified inside “New York”. Count Dooku is the first to react, as he hits Rodimus Prime with a bolt of Sith Lightning that destroys the Autobot leader. Darth Yardigan follows in his master’s footsteps and kills Azeem in the same manner. Qui Gon Jinn then attacks Darth Yardigan and quickly avenges the death of his close friend, Azeem. He then finds himself face to face with his old master, Count Dooku. “I see your abilities have grown since the last we met, my old apprentice,” Dooku says. “I am saddened to see that you have fallen into the shroud of the Dark Side my master,” replies Qui Gon. Maxima, Mary Marvel and Ms. Marvel then all fly outside of Rama to lend a hand to the rest of their team as Qui Gon and Dooku square off.
They ignite their lightsabers and slowly begin to circle each other. Dooku is the first to attack, but Qui Gon does a superb job of defending the attack. He then Force pushes Dooku back, which Dooku retaliates with a blast of Sith Lightning. Master Jinn blocks it with his lightsaber. Count Dooku then uses the Force to throw several object at Qui Gon, but the Jedi Master barrel rolls out of the way. He then flips up into the air and attack the Sith Lord. Their lightsabers spark as they clash, the glow of red and green emit off of the blade onto the two combatants. Count Dooku, then scores the first hit, by wounding Qui Gon’s left arm. Qui Gon then returns the favor and cuts Dooku’s right hand off. Dooku tries to use his Sith Lightning again, but Qui Gon is able to turn it against the Count with his lightsaber. He then finally finishes his old master with and killing strike to the neck. Qui Gon falls to his knees in exhaustion, and lets out a sigh of relief. But unfortunately that relief is only for a brief moment. He hears another lightsaber being ignited, and turns to find Bill Kelly holding his blue lightsaber. “I’m very sorry Master Jinn,” Bill says reluctantly as he drives his lightsaber deep into Qui Gon’s abdomen. With his dying breath, Qui Gon replies, “I’m sorry too,” as he puts his lightsaber into Bill’s chest. Both of them crumple to the floor of Rama.
Outside in space, the battle rages on. The Brotherhood currently has their back up against the proverbial wall. Their ranks have dwindled down to Magneto, Quasar, Omega Supreme, Adam Warlock, Air Zimmell, Avian #1, Blue Lantern #1 and the trio of Green Lanterns; Ch’p, Amanita, and Larvox. The Green Lanterns waste no time in attacking Dex-Starr, Karu-Sil and Fatality. The Blue Lantern flies over and gives all the Green Lanterns a much needed power boost. Amanita uses her cosmic awareness to destroy Karu-Sil and her pack of yellow energy beasts. Blue Lantern #1 and Ch’p combine their forces to euthanize Dex-Starr as Larvox battles Fatality. The Star Sapphire is able to overcome the Green Lantern and kills Larvox. Taa takes the opportunity of the Blue Lantern in his vicinity and powers up his ring to take on Adam Warlock. But even with his ring on “Blue Lantern Steroids” Taa falls to the power of Adam Warlock. Ch’p, Amanita and Blue Lantern #1 surround Fatality and are about to finish her off, when Maxima flies in and rips the head off of Blue Lantern #1. She then uses her eye beams to kill Amanita. Mary Marvel flies in and lends a hand to Maxima by killing Ch’p. Maxima flies off straight at Omega Supreme. “Chance of defeating Omega… 2.7%” the giant Autobot bellows. “That’s all I need,” Maxima says as she flies head first into Omega’s chest. She then blasts back out of him and with all her might rips Omega Supreme’s head off. Magneto then uses the lifeless body of Omega to crush Maxima, sending her to the Fantasy Fantasy Graveyard. Quasar and Adam Warlock then team up to take on Ms. Marvel, who unfortunately for her is out-matched and succumbs to her opponents. Bizarro flies in and smashes both Air Zimmell and Avian #1 together, killing them both. Quasar, Adam Warlock and Magneto then band together to make one last stand. “I will handle this,” Magneto says. He then raises his hands and begins to concentrate heavily, so much so that his nose begins to bleed. Then in probably one of the most amazing things this Watcher has ever seen, Rama crushes in on itself and kills Numnius. However, this has left Magneto extremely weakened and open to an attack by Black Adam and Mary Marvel. Dave Bowman then finishes off the last two Brotherhood members with a cosmic blast that blinds this Watcher for a moment.
FORMER POP SUPERSTAR HANNAH MONTANA AND BARACK OBAMA’S “BEST OF BOTH WORLDS” TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDOS ARE VICTORIOUS!!
Better Than All of You vs Xavier's Annihilation Squad
Xavier's Annihilation Squad is Supreme, Radar, Suprema, Ursa, Supergirl, Mary Embery, G-Girl, The Eradicator, Silver Racer, Astro-boy, Molecule Man, Speedball, The Aerialbots, Bonecrusher, Barricade, Windhammer, & Queen Alien #1-4
Betters are Thanos, Green Lantern in Anakin's Pod, Agent Smith, Gwar: Oderus Urungus (w/ red lightsaber), Flattus Maximus (w/ red lightsaber), Balsac the Jaws of Death (w/ green lightsaber), Beefcake the Mighty (w/ blue lightsaber), Jizmack Da Gusha, Slymenstra Hymen, The Sexecutioner, & Sleazy P. Martini, Sabu (w/ Mandalorian Armor) & RVD, David Dunn, Loki & Bartleby, Gray Hulk, Abomination, Anti-Venom, Batman & Astro-droid #17 in a Jedi Starfighter, Robin & Astro-droid #18 in a Jedi Starfighter, Lonestar & Barf in a Snow Speeder, Iron Spider Man, Jedi Councilman #1 in a Tie Fighter, Jedi Guardian #1 in a Tie Fighter, Jedi Guardian #2 in a Tie Fighter, Zombie Phoenix, Yellow Lantern #1 & 2, Red Lantern #1, Zombie Venom, Predator #3, Predator #4, Megadeth, & Doozer #6.
With this battle cry Better Than All of You is geared up and ready to take on the National League leading Xavier’s Annihilation Squad. Batman and Robin take point in their Jedi Starfighters and lead a trio of Jedi’s in Tie Fighters against their opponents. In one strafing run, they destroy all four Queen Aliens that are on an asteroid. But they are then all tailed and targeted by the Aerialbots. Sabu in his new Mandalorian Armor the blasts off and attacks Speedball. Sabu shoots at Speedball, but he bounces off of the asteroid and dodges the attack. He then slams into Sabu, which sends the extreme wrestler hurdling through space, and ultimately getting crushed by two asteroids. Agent Smith however sneaks up behind Speedball and quickly snaps his neck. Gray Hulk and Abomination then double team Movie Bonecrusher. The two powerhouses smash their way to the transformer’s spark and destroy it. Meanwhile, the Aerialbots are still hot on the tails of the Tie Fighters and the Jedi Starfighters. They manage to target and blow up all three Tie Fighters, which then just leave Batman and Robin in their respected Jedi Starfighters. The Aerialbots then merge to form Superion and are able to catch the two Jedi Starfighters, and killing Batman and Robin. Radar then finds and eats Doozer #4. The dog then viciously mauls and kills the entire team of Megadeth. The fallen angels, Loki and Bartleby, find themselves squaring off against the Silver Racer. The Asgodian Avatar of Death quickly streaks through space and kills both angels. Gray Hulk grabs a hold of Radar and crushes the dog, which enrages Supreme. Gray Hulk is tackle by Supreme, which sends both of them spinning through space. Thanos then aids Gray Hulk and they both are able to destroy Supreme.
GWAR then finally enters the battle. They first target Superion. Jizmack Da Gusha, Slymenstra Hymen, The Sexicutioner and Sleazy P. Martini are all quickly killed by Superion. The four lightsaber wielding members ignite their weapons and start hacking away at the massive transformer. They receive some much needed help from Zombie Phoenix who, due to the fact that she’d a zombie, is unable to contain the power known as the Phoenix Force. GWAR realizes this and gets as far away from Superion and Zombie Phoenix as possible. Zombie Phoenix unleashes her power and kills both herself and Superion. The remaining members of GWAR are then attacked by The Eradicator, who quickly and easily eliminates Flattus Maximus, Balsac the Jaws of Death and Beefcake the Mighty. Oderus Urungus doesn’t waiver a bit, even with staring The Eradicator down. He then cracks a smile at The Eradicator. Zombie Venom sneaks up behind The Eradicator and chomps down on his neck. Oderus then drives his lightsaber deep into The Eradicator’s chest, killing him, but in doing so he also kills Zombie Venom. Molecule Man then lets his presence be known and disintegrates Abomination and Anti-Venom. Predator #3, knowing that this very well could be his swan song, decides that he’s going to take down as many as he can. He throws a shuriken at Astro-Boy which cuts his head off. Next, Predator #3 throws an explosive which attaches to Movie Barricade, blowing the Decepticon apart. He then is able to target the Silver Racer and is able to eliminate the cosmic hero. Predator #3 then goes to attack Mary Embry, but Supergirl flies in and rips the Predator’s spine out of his back. Ursa then slams down onto an asteroid and does the same to Predator #4. Suprema and G-Girl then fly after Lonestar and Barf who are in a Snow Speeder. They are able to catch the craft and destroy it. Thanos then gathers his team of Agent Smith, Gray Hulk, Iron Spider-Man, Oderus Urungus, Rob Van Dam and David Dunn to battle Molecule Man, Ursa, Suprema and Windhammer. Windhammer uses his cosmic tuning fork to blast RVD and David Dunn into oblivion. Gray Hulk then grabs a hold of Windhammer’s tuning fork and drives it right through Windhammer’s chest. Ursa attacks Agent Smith as Suprema attacks Gray Hulk. Ursa trades blows with Agent Smith, but she finally gains the upper hand and fries his head with her heat vision. Suprema is supremely pissed off after her brother and their dog died at Gray Hulk’s hands. Suprema is unrelenting and is vicious in her attack. Gray Hulk does the best he can, but it’s not enough to defeat her. Molecule Man then focuses his power on Thanos, Oderus Urungus and Iron Spider-Man. But Thanos’s own cosmic power is too much for even the likes of Molecule Man to defend. All four combatants are killed by the energy explosion. Green Lantern, in Anakin Skywalker’s pod racer, then leads Red Lantern #1, Yellow Lantern #1 and #2 against The trio of Supergirl, Mary Embry and G-Girl. Supergirl quickly uses her heat vision to destroy the pod racer, but Hal Jordan uses his power ring to blast her back. The Yellow Lanterns double team Mary Embry as the Red Lantern vomits red, rage filled energy all over G-Girl. The trio of women are not that easily defeated though. The Red Lantern, who looks a lot like sixty-four inches of pure badass, creates a big red energy weapon which appears to have the inscription “The Hebrew Blade” on it, and swings it violently at G-Girl. But the super powered woman catches it and breaks the energy weapon in half. She then grabs Red Lantern #1 by the throat and proceeds to “Swayze his ass Roadhouse style.” The Yellow Lanterns are keeping Mary Embry at bay for a while, but she is relentless. She battles her way through the yellow energy and kills Yellow Lantern #2. Suprema and Ursa fly in and lends a hand to their fellow teammate to defeat Yellow Lantern #1. The three of them, along with G-Girl, then go to aid Supergirl who is having a hell of a time fending off Hal Jordan. Green Lantern then finds himself surrounded by the five super powered females from the Annihilation Squad. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” Hal says to himself. “Alright, fine.” Hal then at speeds that would impress his best friend Barry Allen kills G-Girl with a green energy spear to the throat. He then creates massive green energy armor to protect himself. Hal valiantly fights off the oncoming assault, and before succumbing to the overwhelming odds, he is able to take out Mary Embry and Suprema.
XAVIER’S ANNIHILATION SQUAD IS VICTORIOUS!!
Betters are Thanos, Green Lantern in Anakin's Pod, Agent Smith, Gwar: Oderus Urungus (w/ red lightsaber), Flattus Maximus (w/ red lightsaber), Balsac the Jaws of Death (w/ green lightsaber), Beefcake the Mighty (w/ blue lightsaber), Jizmack Da Gusha, Slymenstra Hymen, The Sexecutioner, & Sleazy P. Martini, Sabu (w/ Mandalorian Armor) & RVD, David Dunn, Loki & Bartleby, Gray Hulk, Abomination, Anti-Venom, Batman & Astro-droid #17 in a Jedi Starfighter, Robin & Astro-droid #18 in a Jedi Starfighter, Lonestar & Barf in a Snow Speeder, Iron Spider Man, Jedi Councilman #1 in a Tie Fighter, Jedi Guardian #1 in a Tie Fighter, Jedi Guardian #2 in a Tie Fighter, Zombie Phoenix, Yellow Lantern #1 & 2, Red Lantern #1, Zombie Venom, Predator #3, Predator #4, Megadeth, & Doozer #6.
With this battle cry Better Than All of You is geared up and ready to take on the National League leading Xavier’s Annihilation Squad. Batman and Robin take point in their Jedi Starfighters and lead a trio of Jedi’s in Tie Fighters against their opponents. In one strafing run, they destroy all four Queen Aliens that are on an asteroid. But they are then all tailed and targeted by the Aerialbots. Sabu in his new Mandalorian Armor the blasts off and attacks Speedball. Sabu shoots at Speedball, but he bounces off of the asteroid and dodges the attack. He then slams into Sabu, which sends the extreme wrestler hurdling through space, and ultimately getting crushed by two asteroids. Agent Smith however sneaks up behind Speedball and quickly snaps his neck. Gray Hulk and Abomination then double team Movie Bonecrusher. The two powerhouses smash their way to the transformer’s spark and destroy it. Meanwhile, the Aerialbots are still hot on the tails of the Tie Fighters and the Jedi Starfighters. They manage to target and blow up all three Tie Fighters, which then just leave Batman and Robin in their respected Jedi Starfighters. The Aerialbots then merge to form Superion and are able to catch the two Jedi Starfighters, and killing Batman and Robin. Radar then finds and eats Doozer #4. The dog then viciously mauls and kills the entire team of Megadeth. The fallen angels, Loki and Bartleby, find themselves squaring off against the Silver Racer. The Asgodian Avatar of Death quickly streaks through space and kills both angels. Gray Hulk grabs a hold of Radar and crushes the dog, which enrages Supreme. Gray Hulk is tackle by Supreme, which sends both of them spinning through space. Thanos then aids Gray Hulk and they both are able to destroy Supreme.
GWAR then finally enters the battle. They first target Superion. Jizmack Da Gusha, Slymenstra Hymen, The Sexicutioner and Sleazy P. Martini are all quickly killed by Superion. The four lightsaber wielding members ignite their weapons and start hacking away at the massive transformer. They receive some much needed help from Zombie Phoenix who, due to the fact that she’d a zombie, is unable to contain the power known as the Phoenix Force. GWAR realizes this and gets as far away from Superion and Zombie Phoenix as possible. Zombie Phoenix unleashes her power and kills both herself and Superion. The remaining members of GWAR are then attacked by The Eradicator, who quickly and easily eliminates Flattus Maximus, Balsac the Jaws of Death and Beefcake the Mighty. Oderus Urungus doesn’t waiver a bit, even with staring The Eradicator down. He then cracks a smile at The Eradicator. Zombie Venom sneaks up behind The Eradicator and chomps down on his neck. Oderus then drives his lightsaber deep into The Eradicator’s chest, killing him, but in doing so he also kills Zombie Venom. Molecule Man then lets his presence be known and disintegrates Abomination and Anti-Venom. Predator #3, knowing that this very well could be his swan song, decides that he’s going to take down as many as he can. He throws a shuriken at Astro-Boy which cuts his head off. Next, Predator #3 throws an explosive which attaches to Movie Barricade, blowing the Decepticon apart. He then is able to target the Silver Racer and is able to eliminate the cosmic hero. Predator #3 then goes to attack Mary Embry, but Supergirl flies in and rips the Predator’s spine out of his back. Ursa then slams down onto an asteroid and does the same to Predator #4. Suprema and G-Girl then fly after Lonestar and Barf who are in a Snow Speeder. They are able to catch the craft and destroy it. Thanos then gathers his team of Agent Smith, Gray Hulk, Iron Spider-Man, Oderus Urungus, Rob Van Dam and David Dunn to battle Molecule Man, Ursa, Suprema and Windhammer. Windhammer uses his cosmic tuning fork to blast RVD and David Dunn into oblivion. Gray Hulk then grabs a hold of Windhammer’s tuning fork and drives it right through Windhammer’s chest. Ursa attacks Agent Smith as Suprema attacks Gray Hulk. Ursa trades blows with Agent Smith, but she finally gains the upper hand and fries his head with her heat vision. Suprema is supremely pissed off after her brother and their dog died at Gray Hulk’s hands. Suprema is unrelenting and is vicious in her attack. Gray Hulk does the best he can, but it’s not enough to defeat her. Molecule Man then focuses his power on Thanos, Oderus Urungus and Iron Spider-Man. But Thanos’s own cosmic power is too much for even the likes of Molecule Man to defend. All four combatants are killed by the energy explosion. Green Lantern, in Anakin Skywalker’s pod racer, then leads Red Lantern #1, Yellow Lantern #1 and #2 against The trio of Supergirl, Mary Embry and G-Girl. Supergirl quickly uses her heat vision to destroy the pod racer, but Hal Jordan uses his power ring to blast her back. The Yellow Lanterns double team Mary Embry as the Red Lantern vomits red, rage filled energy all over G-Girl. The trio of women are not that easily defeated though. The Red Lantern, who looks a lot like sixty-four inches of pure badass, creates a big red energy weapon which appears to have the inscription “The Hebrew Blade” on it, and swings it violently at G-Girl. But the super powered woman catches it and breaks the energy weapon in half. She then grabs Red Lantern #1 by the throat and proceeds to “Swayze his ass Roadhouse style.” The Yellow Lanterns are keeping Mary Embry at bay for a while, but she is relentless. She battles her way through the yellow energy and kills Yellow Lantern #2. Suprema and Ursa fly in and lends a hand to their fellow teammate to defeat Yellow Lantern #1. The three of them, along with G-Girl, then go to aid Supergirl who is having a hell of a time fending off Hal Jordan. Green Lantern then finds himself surrounded by the five super powered females from the Annihilation Squad. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” Hal says to himself. “Alright, fine.” Hal then at speeds that would impress his best friend Barry Allen kills G-Girl with a green energy spear to the throat. He then creates massive green energy armor to protect himself. Hal valiantly fights off the oncoming assault, and before succumbing to the overwhelming odds, he is able to take out Mary Embry and Suprema.
XAVIER’S ANNIHILATION SQUAD IS VICTORIOUS!!
Week Four: George Washington's Slaves vs P.M.S.
George Washington Slaves are Agen Kolar, Ajax Major, Amazo, Ben Skywalker, Cade Skywalker, Cassandra Nova, Colossus, Corbin Dallas, Cosmos, Dare The Terminator, Inspector Gadget, Loki, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Mr. Miracle, Santa Claus, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder, Blitzen, Rudolph, Sarumon, Super-Soldier, T-1000, Windcharger, B'dg, Zillius Zox, Air Bud, and Jek Tono Porkins & R5-D4 in a X-Wing.
P.M.S. is Tug Speedman, Kirk Lazarus, Darwin, Predator #47, Xenomorph #51, River Tam, Balrog #2, The Peach, Assassin X, Major Maxim, Natalie Kassle, Nateri, Sam Whitwhicky, Pixie, Typhoid Mary, Terra, The Guild of Drundel Dorks: Dr. Boom Boom Pow, Evette, Groudious Maximus, Arjhan Darkscale, & Bagwa.
“Oh crap! It’s Santa Claus! We’re f*@%ed!!” yells Sam Whitwicky. “Dude, relax. It’s just Saint Nicholas. He’s cool,” replies Tug Speedman. “No, don’t you get it. Santa is actually a result of a virgin birth by Satan. So yeah, he’s like the antichrist. Christmas was actually known as the “Day of Slaying” and Santa would massacre tons of people all over the world. But then an angel beat Santa in a curling match and sentenced Santa to deliver presents on Christmas for 1,000 years. But those 1,000 years are up now, and now… wait… does he have a freakin’ lightsaber?!?” says Sam. “Oh that’s nonsense,” replies Tug. Santa Claus, along with his best bud Corbin Dallas, fly in and lops Tug Speedman’s head clean off with his lightsaber. “Sam, my boy, you’ve been very naughty spreading those lies about me,” says Santa. “Yeah, no one talks trash about my friend Saint Nick and gets away with it,” adds Corbin. He then pulls his gun out and blows a hole right through Sam’s chest. Super Soldier and Amazo then goes on an absolute tear and lands on the asteroid that the Guild of Drundel Dorks have set up camp on. They rip through all five of them as if they were origami. Dr. Boom Boom Pow is the only one who is even able to react to the attack, but it’s only to say, “this chicken’s jackin’ my style!” Terra then uses her powers to control several asteroids that are floating in space and directs them at the Slaves. Porkins tries to evade the oncoming asteroids but gets his X-Wing smashed in between them. Dare the Terminator attempts to sneak up on River Tam, but she is more than ready for this battle. The two fierce women duel on a small asteroid as the rest of the match wages on. Cassandra Nova quickly takes over the mind of Kirk Lazarus, who she then forces to turn his gun on The Peach and shoots him in the back. She then makes him turn the gun on himself and forces him to pull the trigger. River Tam and Dare the Terminator are deeply engaged in their duel, but River is able to overtake her opponent and breaks her neck with her legs. Cosmos is flying…well through the cosmos, with Agen Kolar, Ajax Major, Ben Skywalker, Cade Skywalker, Inspector Gadget, Air Bud, and Mr. & Mrs. Smith aboard. Cosmos flies over and drops them all off on a nearby asteroid. They are then immediately attacked by Major Maxim, Typhoid Mary, Natalie Kassle and Assassin X. Major Maxim unloads his massive gun at his opponents (Yep a gun in space. Are we really going to have that conversation??) and aerates Inspector Gadget, Air Bud and Mr. Smith. Colossus rushes (get it?) the Nazi Ubermensch. Major Maxim starts firing at the Russian mutant, but the bullets are just bouncing off of his metal skin. Colossus then crushes the huge gun and rips the much needed hoses out of Major Maxim’s back. He then brings his two mighty fists down on Maxim’s head for the killing blow. Natalie Kassle is able to get an upper hand on Mrs. Smith and delivers a knife right up under Mrs. Smith’s jaw. Predator #47 leaps off of a jutting rock and drives his spear up into the back of Agen Kolar, before the Jedi could react. (Pretty quick, huh?) Xenomorph #51 then mauls Ajax Major, who is able to stab the alien with his sword, but the acid blood sprays Ajax, badly wounding him. The Xenomorph then viciously rips the flesh off of Ajax. Ben and Cade Skywalker tried to get to Ajax to aid him, but they were too late. But they are able to avenge their fallen compatriot and with a simultaneous lightsaber swipe, they kill the Xenomorph. The two Skywalkers then turn their attention to Assassin X and Typhoid Mary. Cade attacks Assassin X, who even though is a skill combatant, is no match for a Jedi. Typhoid Mary uses her telekinetic powers however to distract Ben as he is trying to attack. She telekinetically throws pieces of the asteroid at Ben, but he is able to deflect them with his lightsaber. She then makes Ben Skywalker spontaneously combusts. The Jedi is engulfed in flames, burning him alive. Cade sees this and goes ballistic. He flips over the flames, extinguishing them with a Force push and then drives his lightsaber deep into Typhoid Mary’s abdomen. But he was too late to save Ben, who has died from the fire. Balrog #2 then stomps his way towards the team of T-1000 and Windcharger. The Autobot uses his magnetic powers (Bet you didn’t know that Windcharger has magnetic abilities? Well now you know.) to turn T-1000 into hundreds of sharp flying metal spikes which fly right into the Balrog before it can attack. T-1000 then melts and reassembles himself into his normal Robert Patrick form. Santa Claus and Corbin Dallas then fly over and with a sniper-accurate shot; Rudolph kills Predator #47 with a red laser blast from his nose. (Yeah, it can shoot lasers. Didn’t you know that??) In an odd team up, B’dg and Zillius Zox work together to kill Nateri and Darwin. Terra, Natalie Kassle, Pixie, and River Tam then form together to make a last stand against the horde of Slaves that are surrounding them. Terra uses her power to crush Cosmos with several asteroids. Pixie then makes the ultimate sacrifice and uses her powers to teleport not only herself, but Mr. Miracle, Super-Soldier and T-1000 to the middle of the nearest sun. But it’s still not enough, as the Slaves are too much for the remaining girls to handle.
GEORGE WASHINGTON’S SLAVES ARE VICTORIOUS!!
P.M.S. is Tug Speedman, Kirk Lazarus, Darwin, Predator #47, Xenomorph #51, River Tam, Balrog #2, The Peach, Assassin X, Major Maxim, Natalie Kassle, Nateri, Sam Whitwhicky, Pixie, Typhoid Mary, Terra, The Guild of Drundel Dorks: Dr. Boom Boom Pow, Evette, Groudious Maximus, Arjhan Darkscale, & Bagwa.
“Oh crap! It’s Santa Claus! We’re f*@%ed!!” yells Sam Whitwicky. “Dude, relax. It’s just Saint Nicholas. He’s cool,” replies Tug Speedman. “No, don’t you get it. Santa is actually a result of a virgin birth by Satan. So yeah, he’s like the antichrist. Christmas was actually known as the “Day of Slaying” and Santa would massacre tons of people all over the world. But then an angel beat Santa in a curling match and sentenced Santa to deliver presents on Christmas for 1,000 years. But those 1,000 years are up now, and now… wait… does he have a freakin’ lightsaber?!?” says Sam. “Oh that’s nonsense,” replies Tug. Santa Claus, along with his best bud Corbin Dallas, fly in and lops Tug Speedman’s head clean off with his lightsaber. “Sam, my boy, you’ve been very naughty spreading those lies about me,” says Santa. “Yeah, no one talks trash about my friend Saint Nick and gets away with it,” adds Corbin. He then pulls his gun out and blows a hole right through Sam’s chest. Super Soldier and Amazo then goes on an absolute tear and lands on the asteroid that the Guild of Drundel Dorks have set up camp on. They rip through all five of them as if they were origami. Dr. Boom Boom Pow is the only one who is even able to react to the attack, but it’s only to say, “this chicken’s jackin’ my style!” Terra then uses her powers to control several asteroids that are floating in space and directs them at the Slaves. Porkins tries to evade the oncoming asteroids but gets his X-Wing smashed in between them. Dare the Terminator attempts to sneak up on River Tam, but she is more than ready for this battle. The two fierce women duel on a small asteroid as the rest of the match wages on. Cassandra Nova quickly takes over the mind of Kirk Lazarus, who she then forces to turn his gun on The Peach and shoots him in the back. She then makes him turn the gun on himself and forces him to pull the trigger. River Tam and Dare the Terminator are deeply engaged in their duel, but River is able to overtake her opponent and breaks her neck with her legs. Cosmos is flying…well through the cosmos, with Agen Kolar, Ajax Major, Ben Skywalker, Cade Skywalker, Inspector Gadget, Air Bud, and Mr. & Mrs. Smith aboard. Cosmos flies over and drops them all off on a nearby asteroid. They are then immediately attacked by Major Maxim, Typhoid Mary, Natalie Kassle and Assassin X. Major Maxim unloads his massive gun at his opponents (Yep a gun in space. Are we really going to have that conversation??) and aerates Inspector Gadget, Air Bud and Mr. Smith. Colossus rushes (get it?) the Nazi Ubermensch. Major Maxim starts firing at the Russian mutant, but the bullets are just bouncing off of his metal skin. Colossus then crushes the huge gun and rips the much needed hoses out of Major Maxim’s back. He then brings his two mighty fists down on Maxim’s head for the killing blow. Natalie Kassle is able to get an upper hand on Mrs. Smith and delivers a knife right up under Mrs. Smith’s jaw. Predator #47 leaps off of a jutting rock and drives his spear up into the back of Agen Kolar, before the Jedi could react. (Pretty quick, huh?) Xenomorph #51 then mauls Ajax Major, who is able to stab the alien with his sword, but the acid blood sprays Ajax, badly wounding him. The Xenomorph then viciously rips the flesh off of Ajax. Ben and Cade Skywalker tried to get to Ajax to aid him, but they were too late. But they are able to avenge their fallen compatriot and with a simultaneous lightsaber swipe, they kill the Xenomorph. The two Skywalkers then turn their attention to Assassin X and Typhoid Mary. Cade attacks Assassin X, who even though is a skill combatant, is no match for a Jedi. Typhoid Mary uses her telekinetic powers however to distract Ben as he is trying to attack. She telekinetically throws pieces of the asteroid at Ben, but he is able to deflect them with his lightsaber. She then makes Ben Skywalker spontaneously combusts. The Jedi is engulfed in flames, burning him alive. Cade sees this and goes ballistic. He flips over the flames, extinguishing them with a Force push and then drives his lightsaber deep into Typhoid Mary’s abdomen. But he was too late to save Ben, who has died from the fire. Balrog #2 then stomps his way towards the team of T-1000 and Windcharger. The Autobot uses his magnetic powers (Bet you didn’t know that Windcharger has magnetic abilities? Well now you know.) to turn T-1000 into hundreds of sharp flying metal spikes which fly right into the Balrog before it can attack. T-1000 then melts and reassembles himself into his normal Robert Patrick form. Santa Claus and Corbin Dallas then fly over and with a sniper-accurate shot; Rudolph kills Predator #47 with a red laser blast from his nose. (Yeah, it can shoot lasers. Didn’t you know that??) In an odd team up, B’dg and Zillius Zox work together to kill Nateri and Darwin. Terra, Natalie Kassle, Pixie, and River Tam then form together to make a last stand against the horde of Slaves that are surrounding them. Terra uses her power to crush Cosmos with several asteroids. Pixie then makes the ultimate sacrifice and uses her powers to teleport not only herself, but Mr. Miracle, Super-Soldier and T-1000 to the middle of the nearest sun. But it’s still not enough, as the Slaves are too much for the remaining girls to handle.
GEORGE WASHINGTON’S SLAVES ARE VICTORIOUS!!
Team S.P. Vs. Alice's Wonder Team
Team S.P. is MODOK, War Skrull #1-5, Super Skrull, Skrull #1-14, Binary, Mothra, Ultron, SHIELD Agent #1-4, Unus the Untouchable, Roy Batty (w/ Mandalorian Armor & a green lightsaber), Female Sentinel #1-7, Kilowag, Deathbird, Kang the Conqueror, Vision, & Brainiac.
Alice's Wonder Team is The Q Continuum: Q, Q2, True Q, Q Representative, Lady Q, q, & Quinn, Primus, General Zod, The Anti-Monitor, The Spectre, Vampire #4-6, & Goblin #3-5.
The Q Continuum uses their powers not on Team S.P., but on their own team to warp the reality of the now and put the mighty and ancient Primus in the mindset that he was in when he fought his brother Unicron so many millennia ago. Primus awakens with a vengeance and prepares to take out his wrath on Team S.P. The Q do not necessarily have powers of mind control over a cosmic being such as Primus, but they do have the ability to warp reality in such a way to make even a being such as Primus feel a sense of urgency toward the battle at hand; which is exactly what they do. Anti-Monitor flies in and lands on a small asteroid where Ultron has sent up camp. The 2 begin battling while Kilowag flies off into the distance in an attempt to reach The Q Continuum, who he realizes are going to have to be attacked head on if the Sleeping Kitties are going to have any chance of taking out this space powerhouse. Super Skrull leads his squad of 20 Binarys against The Wonder Team’s Vamps and Gobs, while Deathbird and Kang mount an attack against the massive Primus. Zod and The Spectre hang back for the moment to wait and see exactly how this opening charge works out for both teams. The 3 Goblins are easily wiped out by Super Skrull’s Skrull team, but the 3 Vampires do manage to take out 2 of The Binarys (actually Skrull #4 & 14, which like all the regular Skrulls are simply bearing the appearance of Binary and not her powers like the War Skrulls and of course the real Carol Danvers possess) before they are wiped out as well. Super Skrull, who is retaining the powers of the original Fantastic Four as well as emulating some of Binary’s powers as well as Unus the Untouchable’s force field instantly turns his squad around to join the fight against Primus. As Primus attacks he instantly takes out all 4 SHIELD Agents along with the 7 Female Sentinels that he crushes as if they were pieces of tin foil, along with turning MODOK into MODOD (Mental Organism Designed Only for Dying). Primus then proves that Unus is more than touchable as he crushes the mutant with a clap of his hands, his force field only providing a slight amount of resistance to the huge Transformer Planet. True Q foresees that Vision could be a problem for Primus, since despite his size disadvantage, Vision’s ability to stay in an intangible state could bring this match to a stand still. True Q informs the rest of the Q’s and they then permit q to wipe Vision from this plane of existence. Kang and Deathbird both make a move toward Primus, but Primus grabs them both, one in each hand and squeezes the life out of them so quickly that they have no time to use their skills against him. Zod and The Spectre decide that it is finally time to join the battle. The Spectre moves against the massive Mothra (who seems rather small when Primus is in the match), while Zod flies up to meet Roy Batty. Roy has taken well to his new Mandalorian suit of armor/green lightsaber combo, but he is still no match for Zod. Zod flies in quickly, evading both the laser blasts and lightsaber swings of the Nexus 6 and catches Roy with an upper cut to the chin that takes his replicant head clean off. The Spectre flies up slowly, having no fear in his approach toward the much larger Mothra. The Spectre uses his limitless power to destroy the divine moth, but Mothra in an amazing last ever move as a member of Team S.P. from all the way back to Season 1, releases all of her scales to coat The Spectre with her poisonous yellow powder while she simultaneously blasts him with her sun strike buster to actually destroy The Spectre and make him join her in death. Ultron is being battered by Anti-Monitor, but he has not quite had enough just yet. Anti-Monitor launches a massive energy bolt at Ultron, but Team S.P.’s very first pick manages to absorb the bolts just long enough to redirect the energy causing a massive blast which takes The Anti-Monitor out with him. Brainiac confronts the Q Continuum and begins speaking to them telepathically in a way that only beings of such superior intelligence could understand. Brainiac not only attempts, but actually succeeds in possessing the mind of The Q Representative, but after he does so, the rest of the Q Continuum simply allows The free-floating Representative to die, which of course takes Brainiac out with him. Although the Q Continuum does not seem at all thrown off guard by the interference of Brainiac’s 12th level intellect, it did distract them enough to not see Kilowag flying up behind them. Kilowag taps into his ring’s power more than he has ever done before to explore any possibility of defeating the continuum. The ring tells him that the only possible way is to actually trap the Q’s inside itself and then wipe out the ring’s entire memory core. Kilowag makes this move, and with one immense flash of green energy True Q, q, & Quinn are all trapped inside. Kilowag is amazed that this actually worked but when he tries the trick again, he finds that Lady Q has blocked Kilowag’s mind from communicating with his power ring. Lady Q, then finishes what she has begun and uses her powers to send every molecule of Kilowag’s body to a different part of the universe. The ring, as a defense mechanism wipes away the very being of the 3 Q’s that were trapped inside of it. Super Skrull and The Binarys make their final push against Primus. They all attack Primus’ chest in hopes of finding a weak spot, and they are able to make Primus make a noise that they seemed to think was a sign of pain. This enrages Primus who begins swatting at all of the Binary look-alikes. It is at this point that it becomes obvious as to which Skrulls are which, because only Super Skrull, the real Binary and The 5 War Skrulls are quick enough to evade the swings of Primus. All 12 of the remaining regular Skrulls, that had only been able to emulate Carol Danvers power of flight were destroyed. Q, Q2, Lady Q, & General Zod decide that they should lend a hand to their massive teammate. The remaining Q’s alter reality to return the Skrull’s genetic manipulation powers back to a time when they could not emulate the powers of the people whose identity they are copying. With this accomplished, Primus has no problem swatting the Skrulls out of space. While this is happening, Zod begins a one on one battle with Binary. Binary’s powers are more than capable of putting up a defense against the Kryptonian’s and almost strong enough to defeat him..... Almost.
ALICE’S WONDER TEAM IS VICTORIOUS!
Alice's Wonder Team is The Q Continuum: Q, Q2, True Q, Q Representative, Lady Q, q, & Quinn, Primus, General Zod, The Anti-Monitor, The Spectre, Vampire #4-6, & Goblin #3-5.
The Q Continuum uses their powers not on Team S.P., but on their own team to warp the reality of the now and put the mighty and ancient Primus in the mindset that he was in when he fought his brother Unicron so many millennia ago. Primus awakens with a vengeance and prepares to take out his wrath on Team S.P. The Q do not necessarily have powers of mind control over a cosmic being such as Primus, but they do have the ability to warp reality in such a way to make even a being such as Primus feel a sense of urgency toward the battle at hand; which is exactly what they do. Anti-Monitor flies in and lands on a small asteroid where Ultron has sent up camp. The 2 begin battling while Kilowag flies off into the distance in an attempt to reach The Q Continuum, who he realizes are going to have to be attacked head on if the Sleeping Kitties are going to have any chance of taking out this space powerhouse. Super Skrull leads his squad of 20 Binarys against The Wonder Team’s Vamps and Gobs, while Deathbird and Kang mount an attack against the massive Primus. Zod and The Spectre hang back for the moment to wait and see exactly how this opening charge works out for both teams. The 3 Goblins are easily wiped out by Super Skrull’s Skrull team, but the 3 Vampires do manage to take out 2 of The Binarys (actually Skrull #4 & 14, which like all the regular Skrulls are simply bearing the appearance of Binary and not her powers like the War Skrulls and of course the real Carol Danvers possess) before they are wiped out as well. Super Skrull, who is retaining the powers of the original Fantastic Four as well as emulating some of Binary’s powers as well as Unus the Untouchable’s force field instantly turns his squad around to join the fight against Primus. As Primus attacks he instantly takes out all 4 SHIELD Agents along with the 7 Female Sentinels that he crushes as if they were pieces of tin foil, along with turning MODOK into MODOD (Mental Organism Designed Only for Dying). Primus then proves that Unus is more than touchable as he crushes the mutant with a clap of his hands, his force field only providing a slight amount of resistance to the huge Transformer Planet. True Q foresees that Vision could be a problem for Primus, since despite his size disadvantage, Vision’s ability to stay in an intangible state could bring this match to a stand still. True Q informs the rest of the Q’s and they then permit q to wipe Vision from this plane of existence. Kang and Deathbird both make a move toward Primus, but Primus grabs them both, one in each hand and squeezes the life out of them so quickly that they have no time to use their skills against him. Zod and The Spectre decide that it is finally time to join the battle. The Spectre moves against the massive Mothra (who seems rather small when Primus is in the match), while Zod flies up to meet Roy Batty. Roy has taken well to his new Mandalorian suit of armor/green lightsaber combo, but he is still no match for Zod. Zod flies in quickly, evading both the laser blasts and lightsaber swings of the Nexus 6 and catches Roy with an upper cut to the chin that takes his replicant head clean off. The Spectre flies up slowly, having no fear in his approach toward the much larger Mothra. The Spectre uses his limitless power to destroy the divine moth, but Mothra in an amazing last ever move as a member of Team S.P. from all the way back to Season 1, releases all of her scales to coat The Spectre with her poisonous yellow powder while she simultaneously blasts him with her sun strike buster to actually destroy The Spectre and make him join her in death. Ultron is being battered by Anti-Monitor, but he has not quite had enough just yet. Anti-Monitor launches a massive energy bolt at Ultron, but Team S.P.’s very first pick manages to absorb the bolts just long enough to redirect the energy causing a massive blast which takes The Anti-Monitor out with him. Brainiac confronts the Q Continuum and begins speaking to them telepathically in a way that only beings of such superior intelligence could understand. Brainiac not only attempts, but actually succeeds in possessing the mind of The Q Representative, but after he does so, the rest of the Q Continuum simply allows The free-floating Representative to die, which of course takes Brainiac out with him. Although the Q Continuum does not seem at all thrown off guard by the interference of Brainiac’s 12th level intellect, it did distract them enough to not see Kilowag flying up behind them. Kilowag taps into his ring’s power more than he has ever done before to explore any possibility of defeating the continuum. The ring tells him that the only possible way is to actually trap the Q’s inside itself and then wipe out the ring’s entire memory core. Kilowag makes this move, and with one immense flash of green energy True Q, q, & Quinn are all trapped inside. Kilowag is amazed that this actually worked but when he tries the trick again, he finds that Lady Q has blocked Kilowag’s mind from communicating with his power ring. Lady Q, then finishes what she has begun and uses her powers to send every molecule of Kilowag’s body to a different part of the universe. The ring, as a defense mechanism wipes away the very being of the 3 Q’s that were trapped inside of it. Super Skrull and The Binarys make their final push against Primus. They all attack Primus’ chest in hopes of finding a weak spot, and they are able to make Primus make a noise that they seemed to think was a sign of pain. This enrages Primus who begins swatting at all of the Binary look-alikes. It is at this point that it becomes obvious as to which Skrulls are which, because only Super Skrull, the real Binary and The 5 War Skrulls are quick enough to evade the swings of Primus. All 12 of the remaining regular Skrulls, that had only been able to emulate Carol Danvers power of flight were destroyed. Q, Q2, Lady Q, & General Zod decide that they should lend a hand to their massive teammate. The remaining Q’s alter reality to return the Skrull’s genetic manipulation powers back to a time when they could not emulate the powers of the people whose identity they are copying. With this accomplished, Primus has no problem swatting the Skrulls out of space. While this is happening, Zod begins a one on one battle with Binary. Binary’s powers are more than capable of putting up a defense against the Kryptonian’s and almost strong enough to defeat him..... Almost.
ALICE’S WONDER TEAM IS VICTORIOUS!
Built (Bill) Ford Tough vs. The Horsemen of Apokolips
“Space by itself, and time by itself, are doomed to fade away into mere shadows, and only a kind union of the two will preserve an independent reality.”
-Albert Einstein
I awaken from what transpired only days ago. I now remember the match that took place. . . I remember looking at the teams to do battle in the Rischey Mays during the Week 4 Match. They were as follows:
The Horsemen of Apokolips: Monarch, G-Force/Battle of the Planets crew in The Phoenix, Eternity and The Celestial Fourth Host: Hargen the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nezzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jemiah the Analyzer, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester.
Built (Bill) Ford Tough: (new) Blue Beetle, Han Solo and Chewbacca in a Snow Speeder, The Heart of Gold with Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Marvin the Paranoid Android, Trillian, Jeff Houslander, Capt. Jack Harkness, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato, Ianto Jones, Dr. Who, Power Man, Iron Fist, Archie the Octo-Spider, Cookies, Steve McQueen, Keith Mars, Veronica Mars, Weevil, Wilt, Barry Sanders, Star Sapphire, Grapple, Moltar, Joey, Pacy, Dawson, The Beatles, Mr. T, Ellie, Katie, Simone, Benjy, Grimace, Gigantor, Despotellis, Nom Anor, Mandalorians #6-10, Arachnids #1-6, Fantastic Max, FX and AB in a Go-Cart, Smoky the Bear, Beta Ray Bill, The Flaming Carrot and Dr. Seth Brundel.
The match began with the intensity unlike I have ever seen. The multitude of cosmic entities produced by the Horsemen created true havoc within the space-time-reality continuum. The Built (Bill) Ford Tough Team was suited with special gear designed by the members of Torchwood to fight the Horsemen. Nonetheless, BBFT recognized that they were greatly outmatched, but fought they did - brilliantly.
The battle began. . .
In an unprecedented event, the Celestials removed their helmets; their faces shown for the first time since the beginning of time itself. The BBFT team does not understand why the entities have removed their protective head gear, but they are determined to take advantage of this bold move.
Toshiko Sato (shouts in her helmet comm.): Their heads!!!! Go for their heads!!!
Eson the Searcher was immediately surrounded by Power Man, Mr. T., Steve McQueen, Joey, Pacy and Dawson. Being that the Dawson’s Creek crew was not a true threat and the fact that their characters lacked any manner of significance in the scheme of the television industry, Eson sought fit to destroy them first. Eson used his powers to “scramble” the bodies of Joey, Pacy and Dawson together. Thus, JoPaDaw merged into a single mass and died. Steve McQueen reacted to JoPaDaw’s death. McQueen took Power Man’s chains, climbed up Eson’s back and used the chains to strangle the Celestial. Mr. T joined him. Without his helmet, Eson was actually harmed by the mere mortals. While Eson struggled with McQueen and Mr. T., Power Man rushed up and used his superhuman strength to ram his fist into Eson’s face. An explosion occurred at the fists’ striking and Eson’s life force drained from him. The defeat of Celestial Eson overcame the macho men; they laughed and hugged. McQueen, Mr. T and Power Man were victorious in their fight.
Barry Sanders, Grimace, Smoky the Bear and Despotellis surrounded Nezzar the Calculator. Nezzar attempted to catch Barry Sanders, but the former Lions’ Running Back was too quick. . . at first. Eventually Nezzar opened his hand and pointed to Sanders. Sanders began to run at a supersonic speed. Sanders’ body could not cope with the speed put upon his body and he exploded. Grimace bounced to Nezzar’s head. The purple blob tugged at Nezzar’s head, hoping to gain an advantage, like his teammates McQueen and Mr. T. Smoky the Bear jumped on Nezzar’s back. Nezzar quickly turned, trying to buck both Grimace and Smoky. Grimace held on; Smoky did not. Nezzar pointed at Smoky and the bear, ironically, burst into flames. Despotellis floated into Nezzar and the sentient virus used its abilities to burn Nezzar from the inside out. A cosmic force exploded through Nezzar’s body, which aimlessly floated away. Despotellis and Grimace looked at Nezzar’s body and smiled.
Gammenon the Gatherer faced Star Sapphire, Flaming Carrot and Arachnids #1-6. Arachnids #1-6 swarmed over the Gatherer. They attempted to rip apart his body, but were unable to do so. Gammenon destroyed Arachnids #1-6, since they were a mere annoyance. The Flaming Carrot sacrificed himself and jumped down the maw of Gammenon. The Flaming Carrot overloaded his flaming abilities and exploded in the Celestial’s body, which caused Gammenon severe pain. As Gammenon clutched his body, Star Sapphire flew up to the Celestial and used her ring to create an immense violet light construct that crushed Gammenon’s head. Gammenon’s life force exploded from his body and the Celestial died.
Dr. Who, Dr. Seth Brundel, Ellie, Katie, Simone and Benjy confronted Oneg the Prober. Dr. Who used his electronic screwdriver to mold the armor into the Celestial. The Prober could not move and the BBFT team took advantage of this. Although he could not move properly, Oneg used his cosmic powers to speed the process of Seth Brundel’s transformation into Brundel-fly. Oneg’s probing mind then decided to use his cosmic powers on Ellie, Katie, Simone and Benjy. Like JoPaDaw, Oneg brought the Rama-mates together into a giant fly swatter. Oneg used ElKaSimBe to smash Brundel into an asteroid; both “fly” and “swatter” were killed at the impact. While the fight ensued, Dr. Who noticed a cosmic storm headed their way. While Oneg focused on Brundel and ElKaSimBe, Dr. Who used his screwdriver to “lure” the storm their way. When Oneg was finished with the others, it was too late to realize that he was being sucked into the storm. The two competing forces- storm and Oneg- managed to rip each other apart. Oneg was killed in the explosion.
Ziran the Tester faced The Heart of Gold with Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Marvin the Paranoid Android and Trillian. Beeblebrox shot Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster into Ziran’s face. Ziran was momentarily stunned. The crew decided to take advantage of Ziran’s preoccupation and sacrifice themselves at the same time for the betterment of the team. Prefect and Trillian overloaded the Infinite Improbability Drive of the spaceship and deliberately crashed it into Ziran. The flux caused by the overload destroyed Ziran the Tester and The Heart of Gold crew.
Jemiah the Analyzer fought the Torchwood team - Capt. Jack Harkness, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato and Ianto Jones. Utilizing their advanced technology, the Torchwood gang managed to destabilize the area around Jemiah. Although the cosmic forces were swirling around this skirmish, the Analyzer still managed to use his powers to rip apart Sato and Jones. Before their deaths though, the two were able to harness some of the cosmic forces around their battle and transfer them to Harkness. Harkness used these forces, and with a Torchwood piece of equipment from the Nebulon Galaxy, augmented these forces within his body. Harkness lashed out at the Analyzer. Harkness’ and Jemiah’s bodies exploded due to the cosmic force overload. Gwen Cooper cried at her mentor’s and teammates’ deaths, but was happy to have defeated another “unbeatable” Celestial.
Jeff Houslander, Fantastic Max, FX and AB in a go-cart (fusion propelled) and Gigantor met Hargen the Measurer. Hargen immediately destroyed the go-cart and all of its riders in the blink of an eye. Meanwhile, Houslander controlled Gigantor with the robot’s remote. Houslander knew his way around the intricacies of a joystick and had an uncanny ability to focus on the weaknesses of his enemies. He used the giant robot to repeatedly pummel Hargen until his death. A cosmic explosion occurred and Hargen’s body drifted away. Houslander jerked the joystick and Gigantor’s reaction was to raise its arms in victory.
Tefral the Surveyor met new Blue Beetle, Keith Mars, Veronica Mars and Beta Ray Bill. Tefral decided that Veronica was like Helen of Troy and would drive her teammates to victory. Tefral shot a cosmic blast at Veronica Mars. Keith Mars and Weevil pushed Veronica out of the way and sacrificed themselves for the beauty. Blue Beetle used the magic of the scarab which magically injured Tefral. The final blow came from Beta Ray Bill’s Stormbreaker across Tefral’s head. The cosmic forces explode from Tefral’s body and the Celestial dies.
Arishem the Judge stood against Iron Fist, Cookies, Wilt and Mandalorians #6-10. Iron Fist harnessed his chi and tapped into the superhuman energy of Shou-Lao. Iron Fist’s blow injured Arishem. Although injured, Arishem blasted both Cookies and Wilt, who burned where they stood. Mandalorians #6-10 utilized all of their arm weapons upon the Judge. After they unloaded their arm weapons, they released their rockets from their jetpacks. The rockets exploded in Arishem’s face. In response to the damage caused by the Mandalorians, Arishem wiped away their existence. Unnoticed was Iron Fist who came upon the Judge, once again, and smashed him across the face. A cosmic explosion occurred and Arishem died.
One Celestial remained- Hargen the Measurer. Archie the Octo-Spider, Grapple and Moltar focused on the Measurer. Knowing that they needed to do something drastic, Moltar removed his arms from his suit and shot an intense field of lava across Hargen’s face. Hargen was distracted by the molten rock as Archie the Octo-Spider and Grapple floated to Hargen’s face. The combined abilities of the Octo-Spider’s legs and Grapple’s robotic strength crush Hargen’s neck. A cosmic explosion occurs and Hargen died.
While other teammates were fighting the Celestials, Han Solo and Chewbacca in a Snow Speeder dueled with the Phoenix and the G-Force crew. Although the Phoenix appeared to be better equipped, Solo’s and Chewie’s skills managed to fire and punch a huge hole in the Phoenix. The shot killed all of the crew except for Tiny, Jason and Princess. Believing the ship was going to eventually explode, Solo and Chewbacca decided to fly toward their teammates.
Monarch scanned the Celestial carnage around him. Being that Monarch was nearly indestructible, the BBFT team was hesitant. Notwithstanding, the fact that the Celestials were defeated gave the BBFT team the confidence it needed to defeat him. The entire remaining members of BBFT swarmed Monarch. Monarch immediately used a powerful energy projection to destroy Nom Anor. He then teleported next to the four Beatles. All of the Beatles, except for Ringo, were killed by the quantum field manipulation of Monarch. Moltar fully stepped out from his containment suit and focused the true force of his lava at Monarch. The lava actually managed to destroy a portion of Monarch’s armor. Grapple then came from behind and began to pummel Monarch. Monarch went down on his knees, but was not killed. While Monarch focused on the eventual destruction of Grapple (who was destroyed), lava was unleashed again by Moltar at Monarch. Seeing a weakness in Monarch, the full remaining BBFT force charged. Jeff Houslander, Gwen Cooper, Dr. Who, Power Man, Iron Fist, Archie the Octo-Spider, Steve McQueen, Veronica Mars, Star Sapphire, Moltar, Ringo, Mr. T, Grimace, Gigantor, Despotellis and Beta Ray Bill rushed at Monarch. Monarch managed to destroy Grimace and Blue Beetle. The repeated intensity of the pummeling and barraging of the BBFT team actually defeated Monarch. Monarch was destroyed, but before his death, he was able to kill Archie the Octo-Spider, Moltar and Power Man.
After Monarch’s death the battlefield became an echoing realm of cosmic forces. The deafening sounds nearly shattered my eardrums. The intermittent stuttering of light nearly blinded my eyes. I experienced sensory overload. The cosmic forces swirled through space, creating a fury that disjoined reality. Through the haze I saw the Phoenix screaming through space.
Jason: What’s happening?!?!
Princess: We don’t have time to figure it out now!
Tiny: Get us out of here!!!
Sheer horror is draped on the G-Force crew’s faces at the carnage surrounding them. The lifeless bodies of all Celestials, along with Monarch, drifted through space.
Through the obscurity I saw the various members of the Built (Bill) Ford Tough Team shouting in victory. A large explosion occurred, yet this time, I am able to watch what transpired.
The G-Force Phoenix was caught in the explosion and has itself exploded, killing all remaining crewmembers. As the Phoenix exploded, so too does the Snow Speeder, which was caught in the cosmic waves radiating from the explosion. Han Solo and Chewbacca were able to jettison from the fighter in time though and eventually join their teammates.
Only Eternity from the Horsemen remained alive. Eternity focused on the enemy. He noticed the Wookiee shouting at him, and in annoyance, threw him across space to an asteroid away from the rest of his teammates.
Solo: CHEWIE!!!!!
Chewbacca: Roooaargh!!! Rowwaaargg! [Translation: My friend, we have been on many adventures together. You and I have the luck of the Force. But I believe that our time together is coming to an end. No one lives forever. Not even the Celestials, as was seen by the prowess of our teammates today.]
Solo: No!!!! I can’t go on without you!!!!
Chewbacca: Uuuraaagh! Hooorraaahh!! [Translation: You can and you will. You will defeat Eternity and the Built (Bill) Ford Tough team will pull off one of the greatest upsets in FFL history! I am proud to have served with you.]
Solo (tears streaming down his face): May the Force be with you!!!!
Chewbacca: Graaagh! Rooargh! [Translation: Live long and prosper].
Chewbacca saw a shadow engulfing his body. He looked above and screamed in defiance as an entire planet dropped on his head. Chewbacca and the asteroid which he was on explode into a million pieces.
BBFT teammates used the death of Chewbacca as the final impetus in order to defeat the Horsemen. An epic battle ensued. Eternity was actually destroyed by the entire BBFT team working together, but with the entity’s death came the deaths of Dr. Who, Iron Fist, Star Sapphire, Gigantor, Despotellis and Beta Ray Bill.
The surviving members- Han Solo, Jeff Houslander, Gwen Cooper, Steve McQueen, Veronica Mars, Ringo and Mr. T. shouted in victory, having defeated the power team of the Horsemen. The cheers begin to die down as they see all of the Celestials rise. Hargen the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nezzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jemiah the Analyzer, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester form a circle around the Built (Bill) Ford Tough team. They speak for the first time in millennia.
Oneg: Built (Bill) Ford Tough, you have valiantly fought in today’s battle.
Ziran: You have honored your team’s namesake.
Nezzar: You have honored your teammates.
Tefral: You have honored your owner.
Hargen: But today’s match was more than a measure of honor. It was a measure of hope. Hope shown in another team whose odds were overwhelming.
Arishem: A team that pushed on to the end. . . a surprising and unexpected end.
Jemiah: But Now that we have studied man’s disposition regarding hope.
Gammenon: And now we must study man’s disposition regarding. . . hopelessness. . .
Scientifically speaking, the Celestials have completed their endeavor in this match. They have observed the hope which overwhelmed the BBFT team after each minor and major victory. As they stand, looking at the current faces of Han Solo, Jeff Houslander, Gwen Cooper, Steve McQueen, Veronica Mars, Ringo and Mr. T., they understand hopelessness. . . as in the blink of an eye the BBFT mortals are wiped from existence in the Rischey Mays.
Built (“Bill”) Ford Tough: All dead.
The Horsemen of Apokolips: Hargen the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nezzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jemiah the Analyzer, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester survive.
THE HORSEMEN OF APOKOLIPS ARE VICTORIOUS!!!
-Albert Einstein
I awaken from what transpired only days ago. I now remember the match that took place. . . I remember looking at the teams to do battle in the Rischey Mays during the Week 4 Match. They were as follows:
The Horsemen of Apokolips: Monarch, G-Force/Battle of the Planets crew in The Phoenix, Eternity and The Celestial Fourth Host: Hargen the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nezzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jemiah the Analyzer, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester.
Built (Bill) Ford Tough: (new) Blue Beetle, Han Solo and Chewbacca in a Snow Speeder, The Heart of Gold with Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Marvin the Paranoid Android, Trillian, Jeff Houslander, Capt. Jack Harkness, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato, Ianto Jones, Dr. Who, Power Man, Iron Fist, Archie the Octo-Spider, Cookies, Steve McQueen, Keith Mars, Veronica Mars, Weevil, Wilt, Barry Sanders, Star Sapphire, Grapple, Moltar, Joey, Pacy, Dawson, The Beatles, Mr. T, Ellie, Katie, Simone, Benjy, Grimace, Gigantor, Despotellis, Nom Anor, Mandalorians #6-10, Arachnids #1-6, Fantastic Max, FX and AB in a Go-Cart, Smoky the Bear, Beta Ray Bill, The Flaming Carrot and Dr. Seth Brundel.
The match began with the intensity unlike I have ever seen. The multitude of cosmic entities produced by the Horsemen created true havoc within the space-time-reality continuum. The Built (Bill) Ford Tough Team was suited with special gear designed by the members of Torchwood to fight the Horsemen. Nonetheless, BBFT recognized that they were greatly outmatched, but fought they did - brilliantly.
The battle began. . .
In an unprecedented event, the Celestials removed their helmets; their faces shown for the first time since the beginning of time itself. The BBFT team does not understand why the entities have removed their protective head gear, but they are determined to take advantage of this bold move.
Toshiko Sato (shouts in her helmet comm.): Their heads!!!! Go for their heads!!!
Eson the Searcher was immediately surrounded by Power Man, Mr. T., Steve McQueen, Joey, Pacy and Dawson. Being that the Dawson’s Creek crew was not a true threat and the fact that their characters lacked any manner of significance in the scheme of the television industry, Eson sought fit to destroy them first. Eson used his powers to “scramble” the bodies of Joey, Pacy and Dawson together. Thus, JoPaDaw merged into a single mass and died. Steve McQueen reacted to JoPaDaw’s death. McQueen took Power Man’s chains, climbed up Eson’s back and used the chains to strangle the Celestial. Mr. T joined him. Without his helmet, Eson was actually harmed by the mere mortals. While Eson struggled with McQueen and Mr. T., Power Man rushed up and used his superhuman strength to ram his fist into Eson’s face. An explosion occurred at the fists’ striking and Eson’s life force drained from him. The defeat of Celestial Eson overcame the macho men; they laughed and hugged. McQueen, Mr. T and Power Man were victorious in their fight.
Barry Sanders, Grimace, Smoky the Bear and Despotellis surrounded Nezzar the Calculator. Nezzar attempted to catch Barry Sanders, but the former Lions’ Running Back was too quick. . . at first. Eventually Nezzar opened his hand and pointed to Sanders. Sanders began to run at a supersonic speed. Sanders’ body could not cope with the speed put upon his body and he exploded. Grimace bounced to Nezzar’s head. The purple blob tugged at Nezzar’s head, hoping to gain an advantage, like his teammates McQueen and Mr. T. Smoky the Bear jumped on Nezzar’s back. Nezzar quickly turned, trying to buck both Grimace and Smoky. Grimace held on; Smoky did not. Nezzar pointed at Smoky and the bear, ironically, burst into flames. Despotellis floated into Nezzar and the sentient virus used its abilities to burn Nezzar from the inside out. A cosmic force exploded through Nezzar’s body, which aimlessly floated away. Despotellis and Grimace looked at Nezzar’s body and smiled.
Gammenon the Gatherer faced Star Sapphire, Flaming Carrot and Arachnids #1-6. Arachnids #1-6 swarmed over the Gatherer. They attempted to rip apart his body, but were unable to do so. Gammenon destroyed Arachnids #1-6, since they were a mere annoyance. The Flaming Carrot sacrificed himself and jumped down the maw of Gammenon. The Flaming Carrot overloaded his flaming abilities and exploded in the Celestial’s body, which caused Gammenon severe pain. As Gammenon clutched his body, Star Sapphire flew up to the Celestial and used her ring to create an immense violet light construct that crushed Gammenon’s head. Gammenon’s life force exploded from his body and the Celestial died.
Dr. Who, Dr. Seth Brundel, Ellie, Katie, Simone and Benjy confronted Oneg the Prober. Dr. Who used his electronic screwdriver to mold the armor into the Celestial. The Prober could not move and the BBFT team took advantage of this. Although he could not move properly, Oneg used his cosmic powers to speed the process of Seth Brundel’s transformation into Brundel-fly. Oneg’s probing mind then decided to use his cosmic powers on Ellie, Katie, Simone and Benjy. Like JoPaDaw, Oneg brought the Rama-mates together into a giant fly swatter. Oneg used ElKaSimBe to smash Brundel into an asteroid; both “fly” and “swatter” were killed at the impact. While the fight ensued, Dr. Who noticed a cosmic storm headed their way. While Oneg focused on Brundel and ElKaSimBe, Dr. Who used his screwdriver to “lure” the storm their way. When Oneg was finished with the others, it was too late to realize that he was being sucked into the storm. The two competing forces- storm and Oneg- managed to rip each other apart. Oneg was killed in the explosion.
Ziran the Tester faced The Heart of Gold with Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Marvin the Paranoid Android and Trillian. Beeblebrox shot Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster into Ziran’s face. Ziran was momentarily stunned. The crew decided to take advantage of Ziran’s preoccupation and sacrifice themselves at the same time for the betterment of the team. Prefect and Trillian overloaded the Infinite Improbability Drive of the spaceship and deliberately crashed it into Ziran. The flux caused by the overload destroyed Ziran the Tester and The Heart of Gold crew.
Jemiah the Analyzer fought the Torchwood team - Capt. Jack Harkness, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato and Ianto Jones. Utilizing their advanced technology, the Torchwood gang managed to destabilize the area around Jemiah. Although the cosmic forces were swirling around this skirmish, the Analyzer still managed to use his powers to rip apart Sato and Jones. Before their deaths though, the two were able to harness some of the cosmic forces around their battle and transfer them to Harkness. Harkness used these forces, and with a Torchwood piece of equipment from the Nebulon Galaxy, augmented these forces within his body. Harkness lashed out at the Analyzer. Harkness’ and Jemiah’s bodies exploded due to the cosmic force overload. Gwen Cooper cried at her mentor’s and teammates’ deaths, but was happy to have defeated another “unbeatable” Celestial.
Jeff Houslander, Fantastic Max, FX and AB in a go-cart (fusion propelled) and Gigantor met Hargen the Measurer. Hargen immediately destroyed the go-cart and all of its riders in the blink of an eye. Meanwhile, Houslander controlled Gigantor with the robot’s remote. Houslander knew his way around the intricacies of a joystick and had an uncanny ability to focus on the weaknesses of his enemies. He used the giant robot to repeatedly pummel Hargen until his death. A cosmic explosion occurred and Hargen’s body drifted away. Houslander jerked the joystick and Gigantor’s reaction was to raise its arms in victory.
Tefral the Surveyor met new Blue Beetle, Keith Mars, Veronica Mars and Beta Ray Bill. Tefral decided that Veronica was like Helen of Troy and would drive her teammates to victory. Tefral shot a cosmic blast at Veronica Mars. Keith Mars and Weevil pushed Veronica out of the way and sacrificed themselves for the beauty. Blue Beetle used the magic of the scarab which magically injured Tefral. The final blow came from Beta Ray Bill’s Stormbreaker across Tefral’s head. The cosmic forces explode from Tefral’s body and the Celestial dies.
Arishem the Judge stood against Iron Fist, Cookies, Wilt and Mandalorians #6-10. Iron Fist harnessed his chi and tapped into the superhuman energy of Shou-Lao. Iron Fist’s blow injured Arishem. Although injured, Arishem blasted both Cookies and Wilt, who burned where they stood. Mandalorians #6-10 utilized all of their arm weapons upon the Judge. After they unloaded their arm weapons, they released their rockets from their jetpacks. The rockets exploded in Arishem’s face. In response to the damage caused by the Mandalorians, Arishem wiped away their existence. Unnoticed was Iron Fist who came upon the Judge, once again, and smashed him across the face. A cosmic explosion occurred and Arishem died.
One Celestial remained- Hargen the Measurer. Archie the Octo-Spider, Grapple and Moltar focused on the Measurer. Knowing that they needed to do something drastic, Moltar removed his arms from his suit and shot an intense field of lava across Hargen’s face. Hargen was distracted by the molten rock as Archie the Octo-Spider and Grapple floated to Hargen’s face. The combined abilities of the Octo-Spider’s legs and Grapple’s robotic strength crush Hargen’s neck. A cosmic explosion occurs and Hargen died.
While other teammates were fighting the Celestials, Han Solo and Chewbacca in a Snow Speeder dueled with the Phoenix and the G-Force crew. Although the Phoenix appeared to be better equipped, Solo’s and Chewie’s skills managed to fire and punch a huge hole in the Phoenix. The shot killed all of the crew except for Tiny, Jason and Princess. Believing the ship was going to eventually explode, Solo and Chewbacca decided to fly toward their teammates.
Monarch scanned the Celestial carnage around him. Being that Monarch was nearly indestructible, the BBFT team was hesitant. Notwithstanding, the fact that the Celestials were defeated gave the BBFT team the confidence it needed to defeat him. The entire remaining members of BBFT swarmed Monarch. Monarch immediately used a powerful energy projection to destroy Nom Anor. He then teleported next to the four Beatles. All of the Beatles, except for Ringo, were killed by the quantum field manipulation of Monarch. Moltar fully stepped out from his containment suit and focused the true force of his lava at Monarch. The lava actually managed to destroy a portion of Monarch’s armor. Grapple then came from behind and began to pummel Monarch. Monarch went down on his knees, but was not killed. While Monarch focused on the eventual destruction of Grapple (who was destroyed), lava was unleashed again by Moltar at Monarch. Seeing a weakness in Monarch, the full remaining BBFT force charged. Jeff Houslander, Gwen Cooper, Dr. Who, Power Man, Iron Fist, Archie the Octo-Spider, Steve McQueen, Veronica Mars, Star Sapphire, Moltar, Ringo, Mr. T, Grimace, Gigantor, Despotellis and Beta Ray Bill rushed at Monarch. Monarch managed to destroy Grimace and Blue Beetle. The repeated intensity of the pummeling and barraging of the BBFT team actually defeated Monarch. Monarch was destroyed, but before his death, he was able to kill Archie the Octo-Spider, Moltar and Power Man.
After Monarch’s death the battlefield became an echoing realm of cosmic forces. The deafening sounds nearly shattered my eardrums. The intermittent stuttering of light nearly blinded my eyes. I experienced sensory overload. The cosmic forces swirled through space, creating a fury that disjoined reality. Through the haze I saw the Phoenix screaming through space.
Jason: What’s happening?!?!
Princess: We don’t have time to figure it out now!
Tiny: Get us out of here!!!
Sheer horror is draped on the G-Force crew’s faces at the carnage surrounding them. The lifeless bodies of all Celestials, along with Monarch, drifted through space.
Through the obscurity I saw the various members of the Built (Bill) Ford Tough Team shouting in victory. A large explosion occurred, yet this time, I am able to watch what transpired.
The G-Force Phoenix was caught in the explosion and has itself exploded, killing all remaining crewmembers. As the Phoenix exploded, so too does the Snow Speeder, which was caught in the cosmic waves radiating from the explosion. Han Solo and Chewbacca were able to jettison from the fighter in time though and eventually join their teammates.
Only Eternity from the Horsemen remained alive. Eternity focused on the enemy. He noticed the Wookiee shouting at him, and in annoyance, threw him across space to an asteroid away from the rest of his teammates.
Solo: CHEWIE!!!!!
Chewbacca: Roooaargh!!! Rowwaaargg! [Translation: My friend, we have been on many adventures together. You and I have the luck of the Force. But I believe that our time together is coming to an end. No one lives forever. Not even the Celestials, as was seen by the prowess of our teammates today.]
Solo: No!!!! I can’t go on without you!!!!
Chewbacca: Uuuraaagh! Hooorraaahh!! [Translation: You can and you will. You will defeat Eternity and the Built (Bill) Ford Tough team will pull off one of the greatest upsets in FFL history! I am proud to have served with you.]
Solo (tears streaming down his face): May the Force be with you!!!!
Chewbacca: Graaagh! Rooargh! [Translation: Live long and prosper].
Chewbacca saw a shadow engulfing his body. He looked above and screamed in defiance as an entire planet dropped on his head. Chewbacca and the asteroid which he was on explode into a million pieces.
BBFT teammates used the death of Chewbacca as the final impetus in order to defeat the Horsemen. An epic battle ensued. Eternity was actually destroyed by the entire BBFT team working together, but with the entity’s death came the deaths of Dr. Who, Iron Fist, Star Sapphire, Gigantor, Despotellis and Beta Ray Bill.
The surviving members- Han Solo, Jeff Houslander, Gwen Cooper, Steve McQueen, Veronica Mars, Ringo and Mr. T. shouted in victory, having defeated the power team of the Horsemen. The cheers begin to die down as they see all of the Celestials rise. Hargen the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nezzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jemiah the Analyzer, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester form a circle around the Built (Bill) Ford Tough team. They speak for the first time in millennia.
Oneg: Built (Bill) Ford Tough, you have valiantly fought in today’s battle.
Ziran: You have honored your team’s namesake.
Nezzar: You have honored your teammates.
Tefral: You have honored your owner.
Hargen: But today’s match was more than a measure of honor. It was a measure of hope. Hope shown in another team whose odds were overwhelming.
Arishem: A team that pushed on to the end. . . a surprising and unexpected end.
Jemiah: But Now that we have studied man’s disposition regarding hope.
Gammenon: And now we must study man’s disposition regarding. . . hopelessness. . .
Scientifically speaking, the Celestials have completed their endeavor in this match. They have observed the hope which overwhelmed the BBFT team after each minor and major victory. As they stand, looking at the current faces of Han Solo, Jeff Houslander, Gwen Cooper, Steve McQueen, Veronica Mars, Ringo and Mr. T., they understand hopelessness. . . as in the blink of an eye the BBFT mortals are wiped from existence in the Rischey Mays.
Built (“Bill”) Ford Tough: All dead.
The Horsemen of Apokolips: Hargen the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nezzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jemiah the Analyzer, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester survive.
THE HORSEMEN OF APOKOLIPS ARE VICTORIOUS!!!
Saturday, March 27, 2010
TEAM Vs. Logical Genocide
TEAM is Ultraman, Mon El, Voltron, Galactiac, The Beyonder, Neo-Cymek #1-12, Guardian #1-4, & The Power Dasher Jet
Logical Genocide is Ion, Necron, Red Lantern #2, Neo-Cymek #18, Adam Strange, Starman, V (w/ Yellow Power Ring), Cybertronian Guardian #9 (Cuddles), Titan Force 5, Man hunter #1 & 2, Xenomorph #52, Magmar, Jedi Master #28, Moonstone, Iron Patriot, The Ray, Chris Seeney & Cannon Fodder Smurf (actually Smurf #10) in The Lex-Soar 7, Warwolf #7 & 9 (Sgt. Stabbins & Fumbles), Predator #48, Prometheus & Brett Favre in Superman’s Truck, Terminator #40, Triceraton #1, & Ewok #74
“You ready for this see-eff”! Chris Seeney says to Cannon Fodder Smurf who is sitting on the cutest little easy chair you have ever seen on the arm rest inside The Lex-Soar 7. The Smurf replies with: "You know I hate it when you call me that, and why are you so excited about fighting TEAM, they are probably going to waste us, you know that they have only lost a hand full of times right"? "They have lost more times than we have” Seeney says. “………….Wow, well I must hand it to you. That is an amazingly optimistic may to look at the situation we are about to fly in to, but you do realize that A: They have never lost in space. 2: They are former Universe Bowl Champions. and D: Last time I checked, they have won n a few more times than we have as well". The snide little smurf says. Seeney comes back with: "But Duuude, come on! That's not the right attitude. You've got to get psyched. This is TEAM we're talking about. We're gonna get to fight Superman & Unicorn, this is gonna rule"! His smurf companion says: "Okay, for the trillionth time, it's Unicron, not Unicorn, and plus, you're probably wrong, because I hear that Supes is riding the pine all year". An overly excited Seeney retorts: "Sheah right! Your Mom is ridin the pine. No way TEAM is gonna dog us like that. With the space power we're perpetrating in this mug, we're gonna see all the stars. Personally I can't wait to see how the Thor Corps looks after we use our Logical Genocide to reconstruct their Asgardian faces". As the 2 teams approach one another, Seeney presses the com button and says to the Logical Genocide troops: "Okay everybody, lets set 2-7-1. This is the real deal, everybody follow on my mark. Let's go with attack pattern Delta, I see 3 marks at 2-10. I'm already on my way out. This is Commodore Seeney saying good luck and FOR SPARTA"! Cannon Fodder thinks to himself "thank God Coach Geoff Johns turned off the comlink in The Lex-Soar 7, so we will at least get blown up by the opposing team instead of our own". The smurf is able to keep this to himself, but he has to say something: "Way to just commission yourself a military rank there "Commodore"". "That's what us officers do See-eff, when you are a take charge kind of guy like I am, you do what needs to be done. At times like this there is no thinking involved, the training kicks in and instinct takes over". says Chris. "Well, I agree with the no thinking part anyway". says Cannon. Cannon Fodder Smurf begins to say something of actual relevance, but Seeney interrupts him with: "OH HELLS YEAH! There he is: Unicorn"! Seeney then presses the comlink again and says: "I have Unicorn in my sights. I'm going in, this punk is about to go down like a prom date! Commodore Seeney out". Cannon says: "Uhhhh Chris, that isn't Unicron, it's Voltron and you're going the WRONG WAY"! Chris replies: "Give me a break See-eff, I hit the wrong button. Jeez! Cry me a river why don't ya. I'm turning back around just hold your horses; or caterpillars or whatever it is you Smurfs ride on............ Hah, ridin caterpillars, that funny". Cannon Fodder Smurf says: "You're an idiot..... And while we're on the subject, who the hell taught you how to fly this thing anyway? Papa Smurf"? While The Lex-Soar 7 and it's riveting conversationalists turn around they witness Voltron put his massive hands together and form its sword. Voltron is swarmed by enemies, but the Far Universe combatant is right at home with his surroundings, and has no problem wiping out Red Lantern #2, Adam Strange, & the charge's leader Iron Patriot before locking in battle with Titan Maximum. The Power Dasher Jet and Magmar are about to begin battling, but before they do, they banter about who is the more useful character......... They both then die of boredom. The Neo-Cymek’s are programmed to attack as a unit when possible, which is why Neo-Cymek #18 is pretty easily overwhelmed and destroyed by his former TEAMmates. The Neo-Cymeks then go on to destroy both Warwolves with their overwhelming firepower. The 2 Manhunters manage to take out Neo-Cymeks #1 & 8 but they eventually succumb to the power of the human-brain powered machines as well. Cuddles the Cybertronian Guardian on the other hand does a little bit better against his own kind. The Guardian is able to take out Cybertronian Guardian #3 with a double fisted blow to the back of the neck before the other 3 guardians overwhelm him. Once Cannon Fodder finally convinces Chris that Voltron is not Unicron Seeney spins the Lex-Soar 7 around and continues his search for the best of the best that TEAM has to offer, so he can go “put a hurtin on em” as he so eloquently put it. They fly up to a battle that is already in progress and he shouts: “See, See-eff there he is, The Universe Bowl MVP himself: Superman. And we’re just in time to help out Necron & Ion in their fight against him”. Cannon Fodder replies: “Come on Seeney, that is not Superman, that is Ultra Man, don’t act like a nerd of your caliber can’t tell the difference”. “NO WAY, that is...... Oh wait, you’re right, that is Ultra Man. Well, in that case, I am sure Ion & Necron can handle him. Let’s go find Unicorn”. “Ya know, for once I agree, that Necron guy kinda gives me the creeps anyway”. Says Cannon. Prometheus comes over the Lex-Soar 7’s comlink (it is only deactivated for outgoing messages) and says: “Hey Seeney, quit screwin around and get behind us. We need a wing man for our attack run”. “Uh oh, he’s in trouble, he forgot to call you Commodore”. Cannon says sarcastically. Prometheus & Brett Favre (w/ Ewok #74 riding slingshot) race thru the Richey Mays with Terminator #40, Predator #48, & Triceraton #1 all chillin in the bed of Superman’s truck. The 2 space-worthy kids toys approach Galactiac, who has already defeated Moonstone and The Ray with his amazing intellect and cosmic powers. As the 2 vehicles get close enough to attack. Seeney turns to Cannon and says: “Alright baby, the moment we have all been waiting for: Unicorn”. “This is Galactiac, “Commodore sir“. Not Unicron. Now maybe we could focus on the fight before we get annihilated”. Says Cannon. Prometheus comes back over the com: “Alright Seeney, let’s do this. On my mark open fire. I’m gonna go low and you“..... (Signal is lost). “Whoa! Holy crap, Unicorn just wasted Superman’s truck”. Says Seeney. “It’s not Uni....“. the smurf starts, but is interrupted by Seeney: “Yeah yeah, I know, Galactiwack or whatever his name is. Brett Favre and the rest of the guys in the cab of the truck are granted an early retirement, while the 3 from the bed of the truck jump out and attack Galactiac. Galactiac throws the Triceraton at the Lex-Soar 7 which sends it off course, but the ship rights itself while Galactiac is finishing off The Predator and The Terminator. Seeney turns to Cannon and says: “That was to close” in his best Billie D. Williams voice and then adds: “I’m glad we made it out of that alive. Now let’s go find Unicorn for real”. Mon El lands on very small asteroid, that is being inhabited by Jedi Master #28 & Xenomorph #52. Mon El rips the Xenomorph’s head off which not only kills the alien but also sprays acid all over the Jedi, destroying his space suit and killing him in the process. V and Starman show up to lend a hand against Ultraman, creating quite a motley crew of color spectrums, but they manage to put aside their differences to combine against their common enemy. Ultraman heat visions Starman to death, but Necron, Ion, & V all combine their powers against the earth 3 Superman. Ultraman uses his super-strength (maybe I should say ultra strength) to viciously rip the head off of Necron, but not before he has already expelled his power which combines with Ion and V’s power rings to overwhelm Ultraman and cause him to completely implode. Ion and V are now preparing a final offensive when they radio Chris Seeney and Cannon Fodder and tell them to rendezvous for a final attack on Galactiac. While they are doing this, Voltron uses his massive sword to finally finish off Titan Maximum. The cosmic power that the Far Universe Voltron sends thru Titan Maximum is enough to destroy all 5 members of The Titan Force. Ion and V go racing thru the solar system, and each take out a Cybertronian Guardian with a massive blast of energy before they approach Galactiac. Seeney and Fodder fly around and witness both Ion and V empty their powers into Galactiac. The massive Galactus/Brainiac Amalgam swings his powerful fist at V which breaks thru his yellow energy barrier to kill him, but Ion keeps blasting Galactiac with green energy until the being is completely destroyed. The Beyonder finally makes his first appearance in the match, which prompts Cannon to say to Seeney: “Okay, before you say something ingenious again, that isn’t Unicron either”. “I know that, I’ve read enough comics to know that that is The Stranger, or is the In-betweener. It definitely isn’t Ego, but it might be The Champion of the Universe. Actually, I admit it, I’m a comic geek and all these cosmic beings just run together in my mind”. Says Seeney. The Beyonder waves his finger (or whatever he does) and sends the Lex-Soar 7 completely off course. Seeney loses whatever control of the vehicle he may have had and the ship spins away into the distance. Ion, the Season 3 #1 overall pick has put on quite a show today, but once he is surrounded by The Beyonder, Mon El, & Voltron he then notices that the remaining Neo-Cymeks are approaching as well. Ion knows that he cannot take on what remains of TEAM and uses the rest of his power to go out with a bang and sacrifice himself against The Beyonder, so he can take the cosmic powered being out with him. As Seeney and Cannon Fodder go spinning into the distance they realize that they are on a collision course with the last remaining Cybertronian Guardian. Cannon looks at Chris and says: “Well at least we are actually going to be credited for a kill in this match”. Right before the collision Seeney shoots a puzzled glance at the smurf and says “ya know See-eff, I don’t think Unicorn was even in this match”.
TEAM IS VICTORIOUS!
Logical Genocide is Ion, Necron, Red Lantern #2, Neo-Cymek #18, Adam Strange, Starman, V (w/ Yellow Power Ring), Cybertronian Guardian #9 (Cuddles), Titan Force 5, Man hunter #1 & 2, Xenomorph #52, Magmar, Jedi Master #28, Moonstone, Iron Patriot, The Ray, Chris Seeney & Cannon Fodder Smurf (actually Smurf #10) in The Lex-Soar 7, Warwolf #7 & 9 (Sgt. Stabbins & Fumbles), Predator #48, Prometheus & Brett Favre in Superman’s Truck, Terminator #40, Triceraton #1, & Ewok #74
“You ready for this see-eff”! Chris Seeney says to Cannon Fodder Smurf who is sitting on the cutest little easy chair you have ever seen on the arm rest inside The Lex-Soar 7. The Smurf replies with: "You know I hate it when you call me that, and why are you so excited about fighting TEAM, they are probably going to waste us, you know that they have only lost a hand full of times right"? "They have lost more times than we have” Seeney says. “………….Wow, well I must hand it to you. That is an amazingly optimistic may to look at the situation we are about to fly in to, but you do realize that A: They have never lost in space. 2: They are former Universe Bowl Champions. and D: Last time I checked, they have won n a few more times than we have as well". The snide little smurf says. Seeney comes back with: "But Duuude, come on! That's not the right attitude. You've got to get psyched. This is TEAM we're talking about. We're gonna get to fight Superman & Unicorn, this is gonna rule"! His smurf companion says: "Okay, for the trillionth time, it's Unicron, not Unicorn, and plus, you're probably wrong, because I hear that Supes is riding the pine all year". An overly excited Seeney retorts: "Sheah right! Your Mom is ridin the pine. No way TEAM is gonna dog us like that. With the space power we're perpetrating in this mug, we're gonna see all the stars. Personally I can't wait to see how the Thor Corps looks after we use our Logical Genocide to reconstruct their Asgardian faces". As the 2 teams approach one another, Seeney presses the com button and says to the Logical Genocide troops: "Okay everybody, lets set 2-7-1. This is the real deal, everybody follow on my mark. Let's go with attack pattern Delta, I see 3 marks at 2-10. I'm already on my way out. This is Commodore Seeney saying good luck and FOR SPARTA"! Cannon Fodder thinks to himself "thank God Coach Geoff Johns turned off the comlink in The Lex-Soar 7, so we will at least get blown up by the opposing team instead of our own". The smurf is able to keep this to himself, but he has to say something: "Way to just commission yourself a military rank there "Commodore"". "That's what us officers do See-eff, when you are a take charge kind of guy like I am, you do what needs to be done. At times like this there is no thinking involved, the training kicks in and instinct takes over". says Chris. "Well, I agree with the no thinking part anyway". says Cannon. Cannon Fodder Smurf begins to say something of actual relevance, but Seeney interrupts him with: "OH HELLS YEAH! There he is: Unicorn"! Seeney then presses the comlink again and says: "I have Unicorn in my sights. I'm going in, this punk is about to go down like a prom date! Commodore Seeney out". Cannon says: "Uhhhh Chris, that isn't Unicron, it's Voltron and you're going the WRONG WAY"! Chris replies: "Give me a break See-eff, I hit the wrong button. Jeez! Cry me a river why don't ya. I'm turning back around just hold your horses; or caterpillars or whatever it is you Smurfs ride on............ Hah, ridin caterpillars, that funny". Cannon Fodder Smurf says: "You're an idiot..... And while we're on the subject, who the hell taught you how to fly this thing anyway? Papa Smurf"? While The Lex-Soar 7 and it's riveting conversationalists turn around they witness Voltron put his massive hands together and form its sword. Voltron is swarmed by enemies, but the Far Universe combatant is right at home with his surroundings, and has no problem wiping out Red Lantern #2, Adam Strange, & the charge's leader Iron Patriot before locking in battle with Titan Maximum. The Power Dasher Jet and Magmar are about to begin battling, but before they do, they banter about who is the more useful character......... They both then die of boredom. The Neo-Cymek’s are programmed to attack as a unit when possible, which is why Neo-Cymek #18 is pretty easily overwhelmed and destroyed by his former TEAMmates. The Neo-Cymeks then go on to destroy both Warwolves with their overwhelming firepower. The 2 Manhunters manage to take out Neo-Cymeks #1 & 8 but they eventually succumb to the power of the human-brain powered machines as well. Cuddles the Cybertronian Guardian on the other hand does a little bit better against his own kind. The Guardian is able to take out Cybertronian Guardian #3 with a double fisted blow to the back of the neck before the other 3 guardians overwhelm him. Once Cannon Fodder finally convinces Chris that Voltron is not Unicron Seeney spins the Lex-Soar 7 around and continues his search for the best of the best that TEAM has to offer, so he can go “put a hurtin on em” as he so eloquently put it. They fly up to a battle that is already in progress and he shouts: “See, See-eff there he is, The Universe Bowl MVP himself: Superman. And we’re just in time to help out Necron & Ion in their fight against him”. Cannon Fodder replies: “Come on Seeney, that is not Superman, that is Ultra Man, don’t act like a nerd of your caliber can’t tell the difference”. “NO WAY, that is...... Oh wait, you’re right, that is Ultra Man. Well, in that case, I am sure Ion & Necron can handle him. Let’s go find Unicorn”. “Ya know, for once I agree, that Necron guy kinda gives me the creeps anyway”. Says Cannon. Prometheus comes over the Lex-Soar 7’s comlink (it is only deactivated for outgoing messages) and says: “Hey Seeney, quit screwin around and get behind us. We need a wing man for our attack run”. “Uh oh, he’s in trouble, he forgot to call you Commodore”. Cannon says sarcastically. Prometheus & Brett Favre (w/ Ewok #74 riding slingshot) race thru the Richey Mays with Terminator #40, Predator #48, & Triceraton #1 all chillin in the bed of Superman’s truck. The 2 space-worthy kids toys approach Galactiac, who has already defeated Moonstone and The Ray with his amazing intellect and cosmic powers. As the 2 vehicles get close enough to attack. Seeney turns to Cannon and says: “Alright baby, the moment we have all been waiting for: Unicorn”. “This is Galactiac, “Commodore sir“. Not Unicron. Now maybe we could focus on the fight before we get annihilated”. Says Cannon. Prometheus comes back over the com: “Alright Seeney, let’s do this. On my mark open fire. I’m gonna go low and you“..... (Signal is lost). “Whoa! Holy crap, Unicorn just wasted Superman’s truck”. Says Seeney. “It’s not Uni....“. the smurf starts, but is interrupted by Seeney: “Yeah yeah, I know, Galactiwack or whatever his name is. Brett Favre and the rest of the guys in the cab of the truck are granted an early retirement, while the 3 from the bed of the truck jump out and attack Galactiac. Galactiac throws the Triceraton at the Lex-Soar 7 which sends it off course, but the ship rights itself while Galactiac is finishing off The Predator and The Terminator. Seeney turns to Cannon and says: “That was to close” in his best Billie D. Williams voice and then adds: “I’m glad we made it out of that alive. Now let’s go find Unicorn for real”. Mon El lands on very small asteroid, that is being inhabited by Jedi Master #28 & Xenomorph #52. Mon El rips the Xenomorph’s head off which not only kills the alien but also sprays acid all over the Jedi, destroying his space suit and killing him in the process. V and Starman show up to lend a hand against Ultraman, creating quite a motley crew of color spectrums, but they manage to put aside their differences to combine against their common enemy. Ultraman heat visions Starman to death, but Necron, Ion, & V all combine their powers against the earth 3 Superman. Ultraman uses his super-strength (maybe I should say ultra strength) to viciously rip the head off of Necron, but not before he has already expelled his power which combines with Ion and V’s power rings to overwhelm Ultraman and cause him to completely implode. Ion and V are now preparing a final offensive when they radio Chris Seeney and Cannon Fodder and tell them to rendezvous for a final attack on Galactiac. While they are doing this, Voltron uses his massive sword to finally finish off Titan Maximum. The cosmic power that the Far Universe Voltron sends thru Titan Maximum is enough to destroy all 5 members of The Titan Force. Ion and V go racing thru the solar system, and each take out a Cybertronian Guardian with a massive blast of energy before they approach Galactiac. Seeney and Fodder fly around and witness both Ion and V empty their powers into Galactiac. The massive Galactus/Brainiac Amalgam swings his powerful fist at V which breaks thru his yellow energy barrier to kill him, but Ion keeps blasting Galactiac with green energy until the being is completely destroyed. The Beyonder finally makes his first appearance in the match, which prompts Cannon to say to Seeney: “Okay, before you say something ingenious again, that isn’t Unicron either”. “I know that, I’ve read enough comics to know that that is The Stranger, or is the In-betweener. It definitely isn’t Ego, but it might be The Champion of the Universe. Actually, I admit it, I’m a comic geek and all these cosmic beings just run together in my mind”. Says Seeney. The Beyonder waves his finger (or whatever he does) and sends the Lex-Soar 7 completely off course. Seeney loses whatever control of the vehicle he may have had and the ship spins away into the distance. Ion, the Season 3 #1 overall pick has put on quite a show today, but once he is surrounded by The Beyonder, Mon El, & Voltron he then notices that the remaining Neo-Cymeks are approaching as well. Ion knows that he cannot take on what remains of TEAM and uses the rest of his power to go out with a bang and sacrifice himself against The Beyonder, so he can take the cosmic powered being out with him. As Seeney and Cannon Fodder go spinning into the distance they realize that they are on a collision course with the last remaining Cybertronian Guardian. Cannon looks at Chris and says: “Well at least we are actually going to be credited for a kill in this match”. Right before the collision Seeney shoots a puzzled glance at the smurf and says “ya know See-eff, I don’t think Unicorn was even in this match”.
TEAM IS VICTORIOUS!
Friday, March 26, 2010
The Transfoamers vs. Haley's Comets
"Life, for ever dying to be born afresh, for ever young and eager, will presently stand upon this earth as upon a footstool, and stretch out its realm amidst the stars."
―H.G. Wells
I look at the teams to do battle in the Rischey Mays during this Week 4 Match. They are as follows:
The Transfoamers: Transformers #1-8, Major William Lennox, Chief Master Sgt. Robert Epps, ACWO Jorge Figueroa, First Sgt. Donnelly, (movie) Mudflap, (movie) Skids, (movie) Sideswipe, (movie) Iron Hide, Autobots #1-5, Metallica: James Hetfield (w/ Darth Bane's old lightsaber), Lars Ulrich (w/ a Halberd), Kirk Hammet (w/ an Atlas), Jason Newsted (w/ a Heat Axe), Ghosts #1 and 2, Darth Rage (w/ a yellow power ring) and Sith Lord #16.
Hayley's Comets: Terminator #38, Xenomorph #54, Hordak (w/ a yellow power ring), The Justice Force: The Silver Sentry, Ananda, Metal Head, Chrysalis, Tsunami, Nobody, Raptarr, Nano, Green Mantle and Boomerang, Ash (w/ Mandalorian Armor), Grotle, Wartortle, Infernape, Dialga, Palkia, Rayquazza, Regirock, Empoleon, Prinplup, Piplup, Charmeleon, Mew, Mewtwo, Blastois, Jiggly Puff, Wiggly Tuff, Diglet, Drago, The Defenders of the Earth: Flash Gordon, The Phantom, Mandrake the Magician, Lothar, Lothar Jr., Rick Gordon, Jedda Walker, Kshin and Zuffy, Neo-Cymek #19, Predator #50, Cybertronian Guardian #8, 8-Ball, 6-Ball, 9-Ball and 11-Ball in 8-Ball's ship, Cable in a B-Wing, Junkeons #15 and 16, Dementors #6 and 9, Halk Kar, Omac, Trigon, Zombie Arisia, Ewok #76 and Doozer #3.
Let the battle begin. . .
8-Ball, 6-Ball, 9-Ball and 11-Ball wear specialized spacesuits designed by the evil genius. They utilize 8-Ball's hovercraft which has also been equipped with an additional element to propel space’s airless environment. As they travel, they see space-suited Major William Lennox, Chief Master Sgt. Robert Epps, ACWO Jorge Figueroa and First Sgt. Donnelly approaching. The 8-Ball crew use their amplified cue sticks to blow the Transformer military members off course. Lennox, Epps, Figueroa and Donnelly miss their opportunity to board the hovercraft and twist away. The 8-Ball crew smile at their success of repelling the elite military force; it is short lived. Darth Rage uses his yellow power ring to snatch his teammates and shoot them back at the 8-Ball team. The 8-Ball crew is taken off guard as the Transfoamers board the craft. Lennox uses his advanced weaponry to kill 8-Ball; Epps kills 6-Ball; Figueroa kills 9-Ball and Donnelly kills 11-Ball. The Transfoamer members fly away with the 8-Ball hovercraft.
Hordak watches the scene and launches his teammates (who he has carried with his yellow ring) at the stolen 8-Ball hovercraft. Terminator #38, Xenomorph #54, Predator #50, Ewok #76 and Doozer #3 land on the craft. The Terminator is immediately riddled with Lennox’s bullets. Although its skin is falling off its metallic body, it is more than a match for Lennox who is eventually killed by a well placed bullet between the trooper’s eyes. Xenomorph #54 jumps on Epps. Acid drips from its mouth and burns Epps face. Epps’ screams are short lived as the Xenomorph’s double jaw strikes and kills the soldier. Across the hovercraft, Predator #50 shoots Figueroa in the chest with his shoulder cannon. The Predator pounces upon Figueroa and rips his skull and spine from his body. Donnelly is faring a little better as he fights Ewok #76 and Doozer #3. Donnelly manages to kill both furry foes. Seeing that he is outnumbered by the other team on the craft, he jumps into open space. He is met by the laser fire of Cable in his B-Wing. The B-Wing screams by, leaving Donnelly’s body a burnt husk. As Cable turns his ship he is met by Transformers #3-5. The Transformers unload their weapons upon the ship and Cable and his B-Wing explode.
Above the fighting, Hordak flies in a circle, pondering his next action. He is struck from behind by a yellow projectile and is knocked about, spinning through space. It is Darth Rage, who is using his own yellow power ring, as a weapon. At the same time, the ring is providing a protective aura for both himself and Sith Lord #16. With Hordak out of the way, Darth Rage and Sith Lord #16 land on the hovercraft. Although it takes some effort, the darksiders manage to stab, skewer, slice, batter and kill Terminator #38, Xenomorph #54 and Predator #50.
The Defenders of the Earth: Flash Gordon, The Phantom, Mandrake the Magician, Lothar, Lothar Jr., Rick Gordon, Jedda Walker, Kshin and Zuffy are traveling on a piece of floating space jetsam toward the battle. Ghosts #1 and 2 take advantage of the fact that they do not need air. They attack the Defenders. Ghost #1 manages to throw both Rick Gordon and Kshin off the jetsam piece. Ghost #2 pushes Jedda Walker off. The Ghosts then come together and rip the gear off the heroes. Rick Gordon, Kshin and Jedda Walker suffocate in the airless vacuum. Flash Gordon, The Phantom, Mandrake the Magician, Lothar and Zuffy are about to combine forces and attack the Ghosts. Before they get the chance, Dementors #6 and 9 rip their spectral brethren apart. Ghost #1 and 2 fade away. The Defenders and Dementors see (movie) Mudflap, (movie) Skids, (movie) Sideswipe and (movie) Iron Hide come crashing down on the jetsam. The Dementors are unable to affect the giant robots. Although the Defenders manage to destroy Skids, the remaining Transformers mutilate the Comet members, leaving only carnage behind.
Zombie Arisia uses her green power ring to carry Ash (with his newly adorned Mandalorian armor), along with all of his Pokemon (and Pokemon rip-off) friends. Approximately three leagues away, Arisia sees Autobots #1-5. Except for Autobot #2, each Autobot carries a member of Metallica (wearing protective space gear). James Hetfield (w/ Darth Bane's old lightsaber) rides on Autobot #1; Lars Ulrich (w/ a Halberd) on Autobot #3, Kirk Hammet (w/ an Atlas) on Autobot #4 and Jason Newsted (w/ a Heat Axe) on Autobot #5. Arisia releases the Pokemon characters from their protective shield and Grotle, Wartortle, Infernape, Dialga, Palkia, Rayquazza, Regirock, Empoleon, Prinplup, Piplup, Charmeleon, Mew, Mewtwo, Blastois, Jiggly Puff, Wiggly Tuff, Diglett and Drago engulf the Autobots and their riders. Before the full blown battle ensues, Metallica can be heard-
Hetfield: End of passion play, crumbling away
Ulrich: I’m your source of self-destruction
Hammet: Veins that pump with fear, sucking dark is clear
Newsted: Leading on your deaths’ construction. . .
The slow and gentle Grotle is killed by Newsted’s Heat Axe, as is Piplup. Empoleon and Prinplup gang up on Newsted, but Newsted is saved by Hetfield’s lightsaber, which slices both in half. Hammet with his Atlas manages to take out Jiggly Puff and Wiggly Tuff. Ulrich with the Halbeard destroys Diglett and Blastois. While the Metallica band mates destroy the Pokemon characters, their Autobots assist them in their task of total Pokemon annihilation. Autobot #2 destroys Palkia and Pokemon rip-off Drago. Autobot #1 kills Regirock. Autobot #3 kills Rayquazza. Autobot #4 kills Charmeleon. Autobot #5 kills Infernape. Just before the team can destroy the remaining characters, Ash soars in with his Mandalorian armor and shoots a missile which explodes and kills Newsted. The remaining Metallica-mates look at Ash, Wartortle, Dialga, Mew and Mewtwo.
Hetfield: Shouting gun.
Ulrich: On they run.
Hammet: Through the endless grey
They combine forces with the Autobots and destroy Ash, Wartortle, Dialga, Mew and Mewtwo.
The yellow ring bearers are in a bitter fight, once again. The two are evenly matched. Darth Rage uses his lightsaber to deflect the blasts from Hordak’s hands. Darth Rage eventually manages to get the upper hand and mortally wounds Hordak with a slash across Hordak’s chest. Sith Lord #16 rushes at Hordak and slices him in two. The two Sith Lords focus on the Dementors which are flying in the area. Together, they use their dark side abilities and force lightning to destroy Dementors #6 and 9.
Metallica has jumped on a small asteroid. They see the Justice Force flying their way.
Hetfield: So be it
Ulrich: Threaten no more
Hammet: To secure peace is to prepare for war
The Justice Force meets Metallica. Although Metallica is ripped apart from all sides, they actually manage to kill Boomerang and Nobody. The remaining Justice Force searches for their next fight. They are met by Darth Rage and Sith Lord #16. Sith Lord #16 manages to slice apart Nano. Chrysalis attempts to send a ray from her forehead, but it is easily blocked by Sith Lord #16. Darth Rage takes advantage of this fact and slices through Chrysalis. The Silver Sentry flies away, attempting to obtain help against the Sith. The two Transfoamer force wielders manage to kill Ananda, Metal Head, Tsunami, Raptarr and the Green Mantle, but the fight has taken its toll on the darksiders. As they are utilizing the force to replenish their energy, they are struck from behind by Silver Sentry and Zombie Arisia. Already in a weakened state, they are no match for the two and eventually Sentry and Arisia get the better of the fighters. Sith Lord #16 and Darth Rage are killed.
Cybertronian Guardian #8, Neo-Cymek #19, Junkeons #15 and 16 come to the scene to face Autobots #1-5 now that their Metallica-mates are no longer alive. The battle between the immense robots is spectacular. In the end, pieces and scraps litter the space way. Standing is Neo-Cymek #19 and a battle scarred Cybertronian Guardian #8. All Autobots #1-5, as well as Junkeons #15 and 16, are destroyed. Tranformers #1-8, as well as (movie) Mudflap, (movie) Sideswipe and (movie) Iron Hide enter the robotic fray. Transformer #3 and 6 are lost immediately. But the remaining Transfoamer members destroy both Neo-Cymek #19 and Cybertronian Guardian #8.
Halk Kar, Omac and Trigon face off against the remaining robots. They are soon joined by teammates Silver Sentry and Zombie Arisia. Halk Kar destroys Mudflap and Sideswipe. Silver Sentry destroys Iron Hide. The remaining Transformers #1-2, 4-5, 7-8 are picked apart and destroyed by the remaining Comet crew. Notwithstanding, winning has its price as the Comets lost Omac, Silver Sentry and Zombie Arisia in the final battle.
The Transfoamers: All dead.
Haley’s Comets: Halk Kar and Trigon survive.
HALEY’S COMETS IS VICTORIOUS!!!
―H.G. Wells
I look at the teams to do battle in the Rischey Mays during this Week 4 Match. They are as follows:
The Transfoamers: Transformers #1-8, Major William Lennox, Chief Master Sgt. Robert Epps, ACWO Jorge Figueroa, First Sgt. Donnelly, (movie) Mudflap, (movie) Skids, (movie) Sideswipe, (movie) Iron Hide, Autobots #1-5, Metallica: James Hetfield (w/ Darth Bane's old lightsaber), Lars Ulrich (w/ a Halberd), Kirk Hammet (w/ an Atlas), Jason Newsted (w/ a Heat Axe), Ghosts #1 and 2, Darth Rage (w/ a yellow power ring) and Sith Lord #16.
Hayley's Comets: Terminator #38, Xenomorph #54, Hordak (w/ a yellow power ring), The Justice Force: The Silver Sentry, Ananda, Metal Head, Chrysalis, Tsunami, Nobody, Raptarr, Nano, Green Mantle and Boomerang, Ash (w/ Mandalorian Armor), Grotle, Wartortle, Infernape, Dialga, Palkia, Rayquazza, Regirock, Empoleon, Prinplup, Piplup, Charmeleon, Mew, Mewtwo, Blastois, Jiggly Puff, Wiggly Tuff, Diglet, Drago, The Defenders of the Earth: Flash Gordon, The Phantom, Mandrake the Magician, Lothar, Lothar Jr., Rick Gordon, Jedda Walker, Kshin and Zuffy, Neo-Cymek #19, Predator #50, Cybertronian Guardian #8, 8-Ball, 6-Ball, 9-Ball and 11-Ball in 8-Ball's ship, Cable in a B-Wing, Junkeons #15 and 16, Dementors #6 and 9, Halk Kar, Omac, Trigon, Zombie Arisia, Ewok #76 and Doozer #3.
Let the battle begin. . .
8-Ball, 6-Ball, 9-Ball and 11-Ball wear specialized spacesuits designed by the evil genius. They utilize 8-Ball's hovercraft which has also been equipped with an additional element to propel space’s airless environment. As they travel, they see space-suited Major William Lennox, Chief Master Sgt. Robert Epps, ACWO Jorge Figueroa and First Sgt. Donnelly approaching. The 8-Ball crew use their amplified cue sticks to blow the Transformer military members off course. Lennox, Epps, Figueroa and Donnelly miss their opportunity to board the hovercraft and twist away. The 8-Ball crew smile at their success of repelling the elite military force; it is short lived. Darth Rage uses his yellow power ring to snatch his teammates and shoot them back at the 8-Ball team. The 8-Ball crew is taken off guard as the Transfoamers board the craft. Lennox uses his advanced weaponry to kill 8-Ball; Epps kills 6-Ball; Figueroa kills 9-Ball and Donnelly kills 11-Ball. The Transfoamer members fly away with the 8-Ball hovercraft.
Hordak watches the scene and launches his teammates (who he has carried with his yellow ring) at the stolen 8-Ball hovercraft. Terminator #38, Xenomorph #54, Predator #50, Ewok #76 and Doozer #3 land on the craft. The Terminator is immediately riddled with Lennox’s bullets. Although its skin is falling off its metallic body, it is more than a match for Lennox who is eventually killed by a well placed bullet between the trooper’s eyes. Xenomorph #54 jumps on Epps. Acid drips from its mouth and burns Epps face. Epps’ screams are short lived as the Xenomorph’s double jaw strikes and kills the soldier. Across the hovercraft, Predator #50 shoots Figueroa in the chest with his shoulder cannon. The Predator pounces upon Figueroa and rips his skull and spine from his body. Donnelly is faring a little better as he fights Ewok #76 and Doozer #3. Donnelly manages to kill both furry foes. Seeing that he is outnumbered by the other team on the craft, he jumps into open space. He is met by the laser fire of Cable in his B-Wing. The B-Wing screams by, leaving Donnelly’s body a burnt husk. As Cable turns his ship he is met by Transformers #3-5. The Transformers unload their weapons upon the ship and Cable and his B-Wing explode.
Above the fighting, Hordak flies in a circle, pondering his next action. He is struck from behind by a yellow projectile and is knocked about, spinning through space. It is Darth Rage, who is using his own yellow power ring, as a weapon. At the same time, the ring is providing a protective aura for both himself and Sith Lord #16. With Hordak out of the way, Darth Rage and Sith Lord #16 land on the hovercraft. Although it takes some effort, the darksiders manage to stab, skewer, slice, batter and kill Terminator #38, Xenomorph #54 and Predator #50.
The Defenders of the Earth: Flash Gordon, The Phantom, Mandrake the Magician, Lothar, Lothar Jr., Rick Gordon, Jedda Walker, Kshin and Zuffy are traveling on a piece of floating space jetsam toward the battle. Ghosts #1 and 2 take advantage of the fact that they do not need air. They attack the Defenders. Ghost #1 manages to throw both Rick Gordon and Kshin off the jetsam piece. Ghost #2 pushes Jedda Walker off. The Ghosts then come together and rip the gear off the heroes. Rick Gordon, Kshin and Jedda Walker suffocate in the airless vacuum. Flash Gordon, The Phantom, Mandrake the Magician, Lothar and Zuffy are about to combine forces and attack the Ghosts. Before they get the chance, Dementors #6 and 9 rip their spectral brethren apart. Ghost #1 and 2 fade away. The Defenders and Dementors see (movie) Mudflap, (movie) Skids, (movie) Sideswipe and (movie) Iron Hide come crashing down on the jetsam. The Dementors are unable to affect the giant robots. Although the Defenders manage to destroy Skids, the remaining Transformers mutilate the Comet members, leaving only carnage behind.
Zombie Arisia uses her green power ring to carry Ash (with his newly adorned Mandalorian armor), along with all of his Pokemon (and Pokemon rip-off) friends. Approximately three leagues away, Arisia sees Autobots #1-5. Except for Autobot #2, each Autobot carries a member of Metallica (wearing protective space gear). James Hetfield (w/ Darth Bane's old lightsaber) rides on Autobot #1; Lars Ulrich (w/ a Halberd) on Autobot #3, Kirk Hammet (w/ an Atlas) on Autobot #4 and Jason Newsted (w/ a Heat Axe) on Autobot #5. Arisia releases the Pokemon characters from their protective shield and Grotle, Wartortle, Infernape, Dialga, Palkia, Rayquazza, Regirock, Empoleon, Prinplup, Piplup, Charmeleon, Mew, Mewtwo, Blastois, Jiggly Puff, Wiggly Tuff, Diglett and Drago engulf the Autobots and their riders. Before the full blown battle ensues, Metallica can be heard-
Hetfield: End of passion play, crumbling away
Ulrich: I’m your source of self-destruction
Hammet: Veins that pump with fear, sucking dark is clear
Newsted: Leading on your deaths’ construction. . .
The slow and gentle Grotle is killed by Newsted’s Heat Axe, as is Piplup. Empoleon and Prinplup gang up on Newsted, but Newsted is saved by Hetfield’s lightsaber, which slices both in half. Hammet with his Atlas manages to take out Jiggly Puff and Wiggly Tuff. Ulrich with the Halbeard destroys Diglett and Blastois. While the Metallica band mates destroy the Pokemon characters, their Autobots assist them in their task of total Pokemon annihilation. Autobot #2 destroys Palkia and Pokemon rip-off Drago. Autobot #1 kills Regirock. Autobot #3 kills Rayquazza. Autobot #4 kills Charmeleon. Autobot #5 kills Infernape. Just before the team can destroy the remaining characters, Ash soars in with his Mandalorian armor and shoots a missile which explodes and kills Newsted. The remaining Metallica-mates look at Ash, Wartortle, Dialga, Mew and Mewtwo.
Hetfield: Shouting gun.
Ulrich: On they run.
Hammet: Through the endless grey
They combine forces with the Autobots and destroy Ash, Wartortle, Dialga, Mew and Mewtwo.
The yellow ring bearers are in a bitter fight, once again. The two are evenly matched. Darth Rage uses his lightsaber to deflect the blasts from Hordak’s hands. Darth Rage eventually manages to get the upper hand and mortally wounds Hordak with a slash across Hordak’s chest. Sith Lord #16 rushes at Hordak and slices him in two. The two Sith Lords focus on the Dementors which are flying in the area. Together, they use their dark side abilities and force lightning to destroy Dementors #6 and 9.
Metallica has jumped on a small asteroid. They see the Justice Force flying their way.
Hetfield: So be it
Ulrich: Threaten no more
Hammet: To secure peace is to prepare for war
The Justice Force meets Metallica. Although Metallica is ripped apart from all sides, they actually manage to kill Boomerang and Nobody. The remaining Justice Force searches for their next fight. They are met by Darth Rage and Sith Lord #16. Sith Lord #16 manages to slice apart Nano. Chrysalis attempts to send a ray from her forehead, but it is easily blocked by Sith Lord #16. Darth Rage takes advantage of this fact and slices through Chrysalis. The Silver Sentry flies away, attempting to obtain help against the Sith. The two Transfoamer force wielders manage to kill Ananda, Metal Head, Tsunami, Raptarr and the Green Mantle, but the fight has taken its toll on the darksiders. As they are utilizing the force to replenish their energy, they are struck from behind by Silver Sentry and Zombie Arisia. Already in a weakened state, they are no match for the two and eventually Sentry and Arisia get the better of the fighters. Sith Lord #16 and Darth Rage are killed.
Cybertronian Guardian #8, Neo-Cymek #19, Junkeons #15 and 16 come to the scene to face Autobots #1-5 now that their Metallica-mates are no longer alive. The battle between the immense robots is spectacular. In the end, pieces and scraps litter the space way. Standing is Neo-Cymek #19 and a battle scarred Cybertronian Guardian #8. All Autobots #1-5, as well as Junkeons #15 and 16, are destroyed. Tranformers #1-8, as well as (movie) Mudflap, (movie) Sideswipe and (movie) Iron Hide enter the robotic fray. Transformer #3 and 6 are lost immediately. But the remaining Transfoamer members destroy both Neo-Cymek #19 and Cybertronian Guardian #8.
Halk Kar, Omac and Trigon face off against the remaining robots. They are soon joined by teammates Silver Sentry and Zombie Arisia. Halk Kar destroys Mudflap and Sideswipe. Silver Sentry destroys Iron Hide. The remaining Transformers #1-2, 4-5, 7-8 are picked apart and destroyed by the remaining Comet crew. Notwithstanding, winning has its price as the Comets lost Omac, Silver Sentry and Zombie Arisia in the final battle.
The Transfoamers: All dead.
Haley’s Comets: Halk Kar and Trigon survive.
HALEY’S COMETS IS VICTORIOUS!!!
The Right Wing vs. The Syracuse Valley
“Space is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the drug store, but that’s just peanuts to space.”
-Douglas Adams
I look at the teams to do battle in the Rischey Mays during this Week 4 Match. They are as follows:
The Right Wing: Silver Surfer, Zeus, The Incredible Hulk, Batwoman in a Tie Bomber, Droid Fighter Ships #1-4, Gold Dragons #1-3, Red Sonja and The Pantheon: Agamemnon, Achilles, Ajax, Andromeda, Atlanta, Cassiopeia, Delphi, Hector, Jason, Paris, Prometheus, Ulysses I and Ulysses II in Gen. Grievous' Ship, Darth Malak and Miss Martian in a Snow Speeder, Superwoman, Prometheus, Jool Nooret, Blue Lantern #2, and Lyra.
The Syracuse Valley: Bucky O'Hare, Deadeye Duck, Bruiser, Willy Duwitt, Pilot Jenny and AFC Blinkie in The Righteous Indignation, Young Anakin Skywalker (w/ a blue lightsaber) and Kister in Ody Mandrell's Podracer, Star Fox (w/ Darth Maul's lightsaber) in an Arwing, James McLeod in an Arwing, Peppy Hare in an Arwing, Darth Techno in an Arwing, Jedi Guardian #3, Jedi Padawan #37 and Leebo in a Y-Wing Bomber, Dash Rendar in a Tie Bomber, (movie) Megatron, (movie) Starscream, Soundblaster with Zombie Rumble, (movie) Frenzy (w/ a Red Lightsaber), (movie) Ravage, Zombie Laserbeak, Overkill, Slugfest, Squawk Talk, Beast Box, Fast Forward, (movie) Wheely, Decepticon Spy Bug, Decepticons #1-2, Scooter, Go-Bots #1-3, (movie) Jazz, Rayden and Kid Thunder, Knuckles (w/ a red lightsaber), Shadow the Hedgehog, Robocop, Critters #1-12, Crasher, Billy Mays, Autobots #6-9, Kree Soldiers #1-18, Xenomorphs #94-95, Little Goombas #6-7 and Treasure Troll (un-identified due to the failure of Commissioner).
Let the battle begin. . .
In space, Gold Dragons #1-3 are unable to use their fire breath due to the lack of oxygen. Star Fox notices the apparent flaw of the Dragons and signals his squad to attack. Star Fox, James McLeod and Peppy Hare fire at the metallic-colored beasts. Gold Dragons #1-3 are riddled with lasers and die. Droid Fighter Ships #1-4 fly to the action and meet the Arwing squad. Before the Droid Fighter Ships can take advantage of their slightly better maneuverability, they are met by Megatron, Starscream and Decepticons #1 and #2. The Decepticons destroy all Droid Fighters Ships #1-4 is a matter of minutes.
Red Sonja and The Pantheon: Agamemnon, Achilles, Ajax, Andromeda, Atlanta, Cassiopeia, Delphi, Hector, Jason, Paris, Prometheus, Ulysses I, & Ulysses II are focused on the space battle occurring outside of their ship. While the entire crew is on the bridge, they do not hear the Billy Mays’ blow torch used by the space-suited spokesman. Mays cuts through a section of the airlock, which does not decompress, or activate any alert signals, because of Billy Mays’ stealth scanner. Along with Billy Mays, Shadow the Hedgehog, Robocop, Decepticon Spybug, Xenomorphs #94-95, Little Goombas #6-7 and unidentified Treasure Troll enter Grievous’ ship undetected. The Decepticon Spybug skittles toward the ship’s bridge and sees the Pantheon, focused on the bridge’s view screen. The Spybug reports back to its team. The Valley team follows the Spybug to the command center. Little do the Valleyites know, The Pantheon are now lying in wait. Delphi and Andromeda sensed the presence of the intruders earlier and told their fellow members to feign ignorance to their presence. Atlanta has his energy bow drawn and two energy arrows skewer Little Goombas #6-7. Perseus uses his energy spear to skewer Shadow the Hedgehog. Hector uses his energy flail to rip apart unidentified Treasure Troll. Jason has weapons in each hand, but is unable to deflect the bullets of Robocop; Jason is killed. Both Ulysses I and Ulysses II have their swords and shields drawn. The two manage to kill Xenomorphs #94-95. After Robocop kills Jason, he focuses on Paris. Paris’ body is shredded by the staccato fire of Robocop’s futuristic guns. Agamemnon sees both Paris and Jason down. He uses a specialized disrupter created by the technologically advanced group to destroy Robocop. He grabs the Decepticon Bug before it can skitter away and screams in it.
Agamemnon: Mays!!! Where are you Mays!!! You have made me lose two of my own!! You shall pay.
Agamemnon crushes the Decepticon Spybug.
Meanwhile, Mays is seen in a near-comatose state, lying on the floor of the medical/supply compartment of the ship. It turns out that Mays did not follow his teammates to the command center, but instead stayed behind, searching for “substances.” Mays located the drugs he was looking for and took them. He sings to himself “All the Single Ladies” with a smile on his face.
Although clearly not a space-faring ship, Anakin Skywalker and Kister zoom through space in Ody Mandrell's Podracer. They are chased by Darth Malak and Miss Martian in a Snow Speeder, which like its prey, is not a true space-faring ship. Nonetheless, Malak triggers the Snow Speeder’s grappling hooks at the podracer. The hook encircles the podracer’s fuel injected cells and the vehicle shoots out of control.
Anakin: This is tense. . . .
Kister: Ani. I know you can get us out of this. I’m your biggest fan!
Batwoman (hearing Kister over the designated comm. channel): Support this!
Batwoman fires the laser cannons of her Tie Bomber and takes out the podracer. Anakin jettisons out; Kister is not so lucky. Anakin sees a large form floating his way. He looks down and pulls out his lightsaber. Before Young Anakin Skywalker is able to ignite the blue blade, Lyra comes upon the slave boy and crushes his skull. Go-Bots #1-3 come to the skirmish. Lyra uses all of her immense strength to defeat Go-Bot #1. She is utterly exhausted as Go-Bots #2-3 surround her. Go-Bots #2-3 pummel Lyra; she is about to lose consciousness when an enraged Hulk and Blue Lantern #2 save her. The Incredible Hulk destroys Go-Bot #2 while Blue Lantern #2 uses his ring to create a solid projection that smashes Go-Bot #3.
Batwoman has left the podracer duel area and decides to face off against Dash Rendar in his Tie Bomber. The two pilots are closely matched and it appears that neither will obtain the upper hand over the other. Batwoman actually manages to maneuver her Bomber behind Rendar’s ship. As she is about to fire her weapons, Darth Techno storms into the duel in his Arwing and fires his weapons. Batwoman and her Tie Bomber are blown to bits.
Bucky O'Hare, Deadeye Duck, Bruiser, Willy Duwitt, Pilot Jenny and AFC Blinkie fly in The Righteous Indignation. They feel their ship shudder as it is held in place by Superwoman. Superwoman then punches a hole in the ship. As the air is escaping from the Righteous Indignation, the Toad Wars team rush to slip on their spacesuits. As the team members evacuate the vehicle, Silver Surfer comes upon the scene and uses his cosmic powers to blow each of them apart. The entire Righteous Indignation ship follows its crew to their graves as it implodes.
Darth Malak and Miss Martian remain in their Snow Speeder as they are surrounded by Kree Soldiers #1-18 (all with artificial life-breathing devices). The Kree swarm over the ship. The Snow Speeder is eventually destroyed and Malak and Miss Martian escape. Malak in a flight suit uses his lightsaber and kills Kree #2, 8 and 18. Miss Martian uses her optic force blasts to kill Kree #5, 7, 11 and 13. The remaining Kree eventually gain the upper hand over the two due to sheer numbers alone. As Malak and Miss Martian are surrounded, they are joined by teammates Zeus and Prometheus. Together, the God and Titan destroy the remaining Kree, with the assistance of both Malak and Martian.
All Arwings fly together since they are a formidable fighting squad. Star Fox, James McLeod, Peppy Hare and Darth Techno in their Arwings race to the next battle site. They focus on Blue Lantern #2, who is currently flying alone. Although Blue Lantern #2 manages to defend himself with regard to some of the salvos, he is not able to escape the constant laser barrage. Blue Lantern #2 is killed. Silver Surfer has had enough of the Arwing squadron. The Surfer flies at the Arwings and releases the full force of his power cosmic, destroying all of the vehicles. Star Fox and Darth Techno manage to jettison out of their ships; McLeod and Hare or not so lucky and are killed with their ships.
Darth Techno and Star Fox escape from the melee and float to Grievous’ ship. The duo locate the spot previously opened by Mays and enter the ship. As they pass the medical section of the ship, they spot Billy Mays.
Mays: Hey, I’ve signaled the other with the Billy Mays’ Communicator. They should be here any minute. . . Want something to tide you over until they come?
Techno and Fox refuse the “battle favors” that Mays offers them. They wait and see Decepticons #1 and #2 transformed into aerial vehicles, coming their way. The Decepticons transport Rayden and Kid Thunder, Knuckles and Critters #1-12 to Grievous’ ship. The new Valley team storms the ship’s command center. Red Sonja, who did not battle in the first melee, is immediately attacked by Critters #1-12. Although she manages to stab Critters #3, 5 and 8 to death, the remaining monsters rip her apart and eat her alive. Sensing his team is facing a more enigmatic foe this time around, Zeus decides to transports Darth Malak, Miss Martian, Prometheus and Jool Nooret to the ship. The legendary sword master Nooret, along with Prometheus, manage to destroy the remaining Critters. Knuckles enters the fray and with his lightsaber slashes through Ulysses I. Ulysses II avenges his Pantheon brother. Ulysses II slices Knuckles’ hand off that was holding the lightsaber. As Knuckles reaches for the saber with his other hand, he is stabbed and killed by Ulysses II. Rayden and Kid Thunder combine their Mortal Kombat abilities to kill the Pantheon’s Prometheus. The real Prometheus takes vengeance on the murderers of his namesake and kills both Kid Thunder and Rayden. Star Fox manages to skirt behind Delphi and uses the twin-bladed saber of Darth Maul to kill the Pantheon member. Darth Techno sees his lightsabered brethren victorious in his skirmish and one-ups him by killing both Cassiopeia and Achilles. Darth Malak comes before the two lightsaber-wielding opponents and enters a battle ready stance. The lightsaber duel is furious between the combatants, but in the end, Malak bests both Darth Techno and Star Fox.
The Valleyites determine that the only way to win this battle is to destroy Grievous’ ship. Billy Mays hears his teammates squawking at one another, makes sure his pressure suit is sealed with Billy Mays’ adhesive tape and flies out of the ship toward the Snow Speeder which is now unmanned.
Jedi Guardian #3, Jedi Padawan #37 and Leebo in their Y-Wing Bomber along with Dash Rendar in his Tie Bomber barrage the ship with their proton torpedoes and bombs. The ship explodes and in the explosion, die Atlanta and Andromeda. Members of both sides are floating in pressure suits amongst the flotillas of wreckage. Superwoman tightens her body into a projectile that rips through both ships. Rendar is killed with his Tie Bomber, while Leebo and Jedi Padawan #37 die in the Y-Wing’s explosion. The remaining Pantheon members- Agamemnon, Ajax, Hector, and Ulysses II locate Jedi Guardian #3. A fight ensues. Although the Jedi Guardian #3 manages to kill Agamemnon and Ulysses II, he eventually succumbs to the combined forces of Ajax, Hector and Darth Malak, who joins the fray. Autobots #6-9 see Ajax, Hector and Malak. It is only a matter of time before Autobots #6-9 destroy both Hector and Ajax. Darth Malak manages to take out Autobot #7 with his force lightning and lightsaber skills. Malak is wearied, but faces the remaining Autobots. The Titan Prometheus and Zeus come to the aid of Malak and destroy the remaining Autobots #6, 8 and 9.
A somewhat bloodied Darth Malak joins Jool Nooret in a battle against Decepticons #1-2. Although Decepticon #1 is damaged, the giant robots are too much for the sword masters. Darth Malak and Jool Nooret are killed. Superwoman, along with Hulk and Lyra come to face the Decepticons. After a pitched battle, Superwoman destroys Decepticon #2 and #1 is destroyed by the father-daughter combo of Hulk and Lyra.
The remaining robots come together to make their stand. Scooter and Crasher, along with (movie) Megatron, (movie) Starscream, Soundblaster with Zombie Rumble, (movie) Frenzy (w/ a Red Lightsaber), (movie) Ravage, Zombie Laserbeak, Overkill, Slugfest, Squawk Talk, Beast Box and Fast Forward and (movie) Wheely float in various stages of transforming in a debris field which was once Grievous’ ship. The robots scan the debris and see a battle-ready Silver Surfer, Zeus, Hulk, Miss Martian, Superwoman, Prometheus and Lyra. The final battle between the combatants takes place in a rapid-fire, fevered pitch. One after another bodies fly and robot parts are destroyed. Squawk Talk and Beast Box are devastated by Miss Martian. Soundblaster with Zombie Rumble are defeated by the Hulk. Ravage is destroyed by Lyra. Miss Martian is killed by Starscream, who is then decimated by Superwoman. For killing his major domo, Megatron kills Superwoman in vengeance. Slugfest is killed by Prometheus. As Prometheus turns, he sees Laserbeak. The Transformer’s form reminds him of his prior fate - his regenerating liver being eaten for eternity by an eagle. Overkill, Frenzy, Jazz, and Laserbeak take advantage of Prometheus’ ponderings and kill him. Zeus uses all of his godlike powers to destroy Fast Forward, Jazz and Scooter. Crasher and Wheely are taken out by the Hulk; Lyra destroys Zombie Laserbeak. As Lyra turns to smile at her victory and bask in same with her father, she is killed by Megatron and Frenzy. Hulk is blinded by fury and destroys both Overkill and Frenzy. He is wounded by Frenzy’s lightsaber and succumbs to the malicious Megatron. Zeus and Silver Surfer combine their god and cosmic powers together to destroy Megatron.
Zeus and Silver Surfer look for the remaining member of the opposing side who was last seen in the Snow Speeder. As they approach the Speeder, they slowly see that it is simply drifting. They look into the cockpit and discover Billy Mays, spittle around his mouth and his eyes wide open. Mays has suffered from a heart attack – at the fury of the battle – nothing to do with the amount of drugs ingested.
The Right Wing: Silver Surfer and Zeus survive.
The Syracuse Valley: All dead.
THE RIGHT WING IS VICTORIOUS!!!
-Douglas Adams
I look at the teams to do battle in the Rischey Mays during this Week 4 Match. They are as follows:
The Right Wing: Silver Surfer, Zeus, The Incredible Hulk, Batwoman in a Tie Bomber, Droid Fighter Ships #1-4, Gold Dragons #1-3, Red Sonja and The Pantheon: Agamemnon, Achilles, Ajax, Andromeda, Atlanta, Cassiopeia, Delphi, Hector, Jason, Paris, Prometheus, Ulysses I and Ulysses II in Gen. Grievous' Ship, Darth Malak and Miss Martian in a Snow Speeder, Superwoman, Prometheus, Jool Nooret, Blue Lantern #2, and Lyra.
The Syracuse Valley: Bucky O'Hare, Deadeye Duck, Bruiser, Willy Duwitt, Pilot Jenny and AFC Blinkie in The Righteous Indignation, Young Anakin Skywalker (w/ a blue lightsaber) and Kister in Ody Mandrell's Podracer, Star Fox (w/ Darth Maul's lightsaber) in an Arwing, James McLeod in an Arwing, Peppy Hare in an Arwing, Darth Techno in an Arwing, Jedi Guardian #3, Jedi Padawan #37 and Leebo in a Y-Wing Bomber, Dash Rendar in a Tie Bomber, (movie) Megatron, (movie) Starscream, Soundblaster with Zombie Rumble, (movie) Frenzy (w/ a Red Lightsaber), (movie) Ravage, Zombie Laserbeak, Overkill, Slugfest, Squawk Talk, Beast Box, Fast Forward, (movie) Wheely, Decepticon Spy Bug, Decepticons #1-2, Scooter, Go-Bots #1-3, (movie) Jazz, Rayden and Kid Thunder, Knuckles (w/ a red lightsaber), Shadow the Hedgehog, Robocop, Critters #1-12, Crasher, Billy Mays, Autobots #6-9, Kree Soldiers #1-18, Xenomorphs #94-95, Little Goombas #6-7 and Treasure Troll (un-identified due to the failure of Commissioner).
Let the battle begin. . .
In space, Gold Dragons #1-3 are unable to use their fire breath due to the lack of oxygen. Star Fox notices the apparent flaw of the Dragons and signals his squad to attack. Star Fox, James McLeod and Peppy Hare fire at the metallic-colored beasts. Gold Dragons #1-3 are riddled with lasers and die. Droid Fighter Ships #1-4 fly to the action and meet the Arwing squad. Before the Droid Fighter Ships can take advantage of their slightly better maneuverability, they are met by Megatron, Starscream and Decepticons #1 and #2. The Decepticons destroy all Droid Fighters Ships #1-4 is a matter of minutes.
Red Sonja and The Pantheon: Agamemnon, Achilles, Ajax, Andromeda, Atlanta, Cassiopeia, Delphi, Hector, Jason, Paris, Prometheus, Ulysses I, & Ulysses II are focused on the space battle occurring outside of their ship. While the entire crew is on the bridge, they do not hear the Billy Mays’ blow torch used by the space-suited spokesman. Mays cuts through a section of the airlock, which does not decompress, or activate any alert signals, because of Billy Mays’ stealth scanner. Along with Billy Mays, Shadow the Hedgehog, Robocop, Decepticon Spybug, Xenomorphs #94-95, Little Goombas #6-7 and unidentified Treasure Troll enter Grievous’ ship undetected. The Decepticon Spybug skittles toward the ship’s bridge and sees the Pantheon, focused on the bridge’s view screen. The Spybug reports back to its team. The Valley team follows the Spybug to the command center. Little do the Valleyites know, The Pantheon are now lying in wait. Delphi and Andromeda sensed the presence of the intruders earlier and told their fellow members to feign ignorance to their presence. Atlanta has his energy bow drawn and two energy arrows skewer Little Goombas #6-7. Perseus uses his energy spear to skewer Shadow the Hedgehog. Hector uses his energy flail to rip apart unidentified Treasure Troll. Jason has weapons in each hand, but is unable to deflect the bullets of Robocop; Jason is killed. Both Ulysses I and Ulysses II have their swords and shields drawn. The two manage to kill Xenomorphs #94-95. After Robocop kills Jason, he focuses on Paris. Paris’ body is shredded by the staccato fire of Robocop’s futuristic guns. Agamemnon sees both Paris and Jason down. He uses a specialized disrupter created by the technologically advanced group to destroy Robocop. He grabs the Decepticon Bug before it can skitter away and screams in it.
Agamemnon: Mays!!! Where are you Mays!!! You have made me lose two of my own!! You shall pay.
Agamemnon crushes the Decepticon Spybug.
Meanwhile, Mays is seen in a near-comatose state, lying on the floor of the medical/supply compartment of the ship. It turns out that Mays did not follow his teammates to the command center, but instead stayed behind, searching for “substances.” Mays located the drugs he was looking for and took them. He sings to himself “All the Single Ladies” with a smile on his face.
Although clearly not a space-faring ship, Anakin Skywalker and Kister zoom through space in Ody Mandrell's Podracer. They are chased by Darth Malak and Miss Martian in a Snow Speeder, which like its prey, is not a true space-faring ship. Nonetheless, Malak triggers the Snow Speeder’s grappling hooks at the podracer. The hook encircles the podracer’s fuel injected cells and the vehicle shoots out of control.
Anakin: This is tense. . . .
Kister: Ani. I know you can get us out of this. I’m your biggest fan!
Batwoman (hearing Kister over the designated comm. channel): Support this!
Batwoman fires the laser cannons of her Tie Bomber and takes out the podracer. Anakin jettisons out; Kister is not so lucky. Anakin sees a large form floating his way. He looks down and pulls out his lightsaber. Before Young Anakin Skywalker is able to ignite the blue blade, Lyra comes upon the slave boy and crushes his skull. Go-Bots #1-3 come to the skirmish. Lyra uses all of her immense strength to defeat Go-Bot #1. She is utterly exhausted as Go-Bots #2-3 surround her. Go-Bots #2-3 pummel Lyra; she is about to lose consciousness when an enraged Hulk and Blue Lantern #2 save her. The Incredible Hulk destroys Go-Bot #2 while Blue Lantern #2 uses his ring to create a solid projection that smashes Go-Bot #3.
Batwoman has left the podracer duel area and decides to face off against Dash Rendar in his Tie Bomber. The two pilots are closely matched and it appears that neither will obtain the upper hand over the other. Batwoman actually manages to maneuver her Bomber behind Rendar’s ship. As she is about to fire her weapons, Darth Techno storms into the duel in his Arwing and fires his weapons. Batwoman and her Tie Bomber are blown to bits.
Bucky O'Hare, Deadeye Duck, Bruiser, Willy Duwitt, Pilot Jenny and AFC Blinkie fly in The Righteous Indignation. They feel their ship shudder as it is held in place by Superwoman. Superwoman then punches a hole in the ship. As the air is escaping from the Righteous Indignation, the Toad Wars team rush to slip on their spacesuits. As the team members evacuate the vehicle, Silver Surfer comes upon the scene and uses his cosmic powers to blow each of them apart. The entire Righteous Indignation ship follows its crew to their graves as it implodes.
Darth Malak and Miss Martian remain in their Snow Speeder as they are surrounded by Kree Soldiers #1-18 (all with artificial life-breathing devices). The Kree swarm over the ship. The Snow Speeder is eventually destroyed and Malak and Miss Martian escape. Malak in a flight suit uses his lightsaber and kills Kree #2, 8 and 18. Miss Martian uses her optic force blasts to kill Kree #5, 7, 11 and 13. The remaining Kree eventually gain the upper hand over the two due to sheer numbers alone. As Malak and Miss Martian are surrounded, they are joined by teammates Zeus and Prometheus. Together, the God and Titan destroy the remaining Kree, with the assistance of both Malak and Martian.
All Arwings fly together since they are a formidable fighting squad. Star Fox, James McLeod, Peppy Hare and Darth Techno in their Arwings race to the next battle site. They focus on Blue Lantern #2, who is currently flying alone. Although Blue Lantern #2 manages to defend himself with regard to some of the salvos, he is not able to escape the constant laser barrage. Blue Lantern #2 is killed. Silver Surfer has had enough of the Arwing squadron. The Surfer flies at the Arwings and releases the full force of his power cosmic, destroying all of the vehicles. Star Fox and Darth Techno manage to jettison out of their ships; McLeod and Hare or not so lucky and are killed with their ships.
Darth Techno and Star Fox escape from the melee and float to Grievous’ ship. The duo locate the spot previously opened by Mays and enter the ship. As they pass the medical section of the ship, they spot Billy Mays.
Mays: Hey, I’ve signaled the other with the Billy Mays’ Communicator. They should be here any minute. . . Want something to tide you over until they come?
Techno and Fox refuse the “battle favors” that Mays offers them. They wait and see Decepticons #1 and #2 transformed into aerial vehicles, coming their way. The Decepticons transport Rayden and Kid Thunder, Knuckles and Critters #1-12 to Grievous’ ship. The new Valley team storms the ship’s command center. Red Sonja, who did not battle in the first melee, is immediately attacked by Critters #1-12. Although she manages to stab Critters #3, 5 and 8 to death, the remaining monsters rip her apart and eat her alive. Sensing his team is facing a more enigmatic foe this time around, Zeus decides to transports Darth Malak, Miss Martian, Prometheus and Jool Nooret to the ship. The legendary sword master Nooret, along with Prometheus, manage to destroy the remaining Critters. Knuckles enters the fray and with his lightsaber slashes through Ulysses I. Ulysses II avenges his Pantheon brother. Ulysses II slices Knuckles’ hand off that was holding the lightsaber. As Knuckles reaches for the saber with his other hand, he is stabbed and killed by Ulysses II. Rayden and Kid Thunder combine their Mortal Kombat abilities to kill the Pantheon’s Prometheus. The real Prometheus takes vengeance on the murderers of his namesake and kills both Kid Thunder and Rayden. Star Fox manages to skirt behind Delphi and uses the twin-bladed saber of Darth Maul to kill the Pantheon member. Darth Techno sees his lightsabered brethren victorious in his skirmish and one-ups him by killing both Cassiopeia and Achilles. Darth Malak comes before the two lightsaber-wielding opponents and enters a battle ready stance. The lightsaber duel is furious between the combatants, but in the end, Malak bests both Darth Techno and Star Fox.
The Valleyites determine that the only way to win this battle is to destroy Grievous’ ship. Billy Mays hears his teammates squawking at one another, makes sure his pressure suit is sealed with Billy Mays’ adhesive tape and flies out of the ship toward the Snow Speeder which is now unmanned.
Jedi Guardian #3, Jedi Padawan #37 and Leebo in their Y-Wing Bomber along with Dash Rendar in his Tie Bomber barrage the ship with their proton torpedoes and bombs. The ship explodes and in the explosion, die Atlanta and Andromeda. Members of both sides are floating in pressure suits amongst the flotillas of wreckage. Superwoman tightens her body into a projectile that rips through both ships. Rendar is killed with his Tie Bomber, while Leebo and Jedi Padawan #37 die in the Y-Wing’s explosion. The remaining Pantheon members- Agamemnon, Ajax, Hector, and Ulysses II locate Jedi Guardian #3. A fight ensues. Although the Jedi Guardian #3 manages to kill Agamemnon and Ulysses II, he eventually succumbs to the combined forces of Ajax, Hector and Darth Malak, who joins the fray. Autobots #6-9 see Ajax, Hector and Malak. It is only a matter of time before Autobots #6-9 destroy both Hector and Ajax. Darth Malak manages to take out Autobot #7 with his force lightning and lightsaber skills. Malak is wearied, but faces the remaining Autobots. The Titan Prometheus and Zeus come to the aid of Malak and destroy the remaining Autobots #6, 8 and 9.
A somewhat bloodied Darth Malak joins Jool Nooret in a battle against Decepticons #1-2. Although Decepticon #1 is damaged, the giant robots are too much for the sword masters. Darth Malak and Jool Nooret are killed. Superwoman, along with Hulk and Lyra come to face the Decepticons. After a pitched battle, Superwoman destroys Decepticon #2 and #1 is destroyed by the father-daughter combo of Hulk and Lyra.
The remaining robots come together to make their stand. Scooter and Crasher, along with (movie) Megatron, (movie) Starscream, Soundblaster with Zombie Rumble, (movie) Frenzy (w/ a Red Lightsaber), (movie) Ravage, Zombie Laserbeak, Overkill, Slugfest, Squawk Talk, Beast Box and Fast Forward and (movie) Wheely float in various stages of transforming in a debris field which was once Grievous’ ship. The robots scan the debris and see a battle-ready Silver Surfer, Zeus, Hulk, Miss Martian, Superwoman, Prometheus and Lyra. The final battle between the combatants takes place in a rapid-fire, fevered pitch. One after another bodies fly and robot parts are destroyed. Squawk Talk and Beast Box are devastated by Miss Martian. Soundblaster with Zombie Rumble are defeated by the Hulk. Ravage is destroyed by Lyra. Miss Martian is killed by Starscream, who is then decimated by Superwoman. For killing his major domo, Megatron kills Superwoman in vengeance. Slugfest is killed by Prometheus. As Prometheus turns, he sees Laserbeak. The Transformer’s form reminds him of his prior fate - his regenerating liver being eaten for eternity by an eagle. Overkill, Frenzy, Jazz, and Laserbeak take advantage of Prometheus’ ponderings and kill him. Zeus uses all of his godlike powers to destroy Fast Forward, Jazz and Scooter. Crasher and Wheely are taken out by the Hulk; Lyra destroys Zombie Laserbeak. As Lyra turns to smile at her victory and bask in same with her father, she is killed by Megatron and Frenzy. Hulk is blinded by fury and destroys both Overkill and Frenzy. He is wounded by Frenzy’s lightsaber and succumbs to the malicious Megatron. Zeus and Silver Surfer combine their god and cosmic powers together to destroy Megatron.
Zeus and Silver Surfer look for the remaining member of the opposing side who was last seen in the Snow Speeder. As they approach the Speeder, they slowly see that it is simply drifting. They look into the cockpit and discover Billy Mays, spittle around his mouth and his eyes wide open. Mays has suffered from a heart attack – at the fury of the battle – nothing to do with the amount of drugs ingested.
The Right Wing: Silver Surfer and Zeus survive.
The Syracuse Valley: All dead.
THE RIGHT WING IS VICTORIOUS!!!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
The Horsemen of Apokolips vs. Built (Bill) Ford Tough
“Space by itself, and time by itself, are doomed to fade away into mere shadows, and only a kind union of the two will preserve an independent reality.”
-Albert Einstein
I try to locate the battlefield in the Rischey Mays. The deafening sounds nearly shatter my eardrums. The intermittent stuttering of light nearly blinds my eyes. I experience sensory overload. The cosmic forces swirl through space, creating a fury that disjoins reality. Through the haze I see the Phoenix screaming through space.
Jason: What’s happening?!?!
Princess: We don’t have time to figure it out now!
Tiny: Get us out of here!!!
Sheer horror is draped on the G-Force crew’s faces at the carnage surrounding them. The lifeless bodies of Hargon the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nazzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jeremiah the Analyzor, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester drift through space.
Through the obscurity I see various members of the Built (Bill) Ford Tough Team shouting in victory. A large explosion occurs and I am unable to watch further. . .
-Albert Einstein
I try to locate the battlefield in the Rischey Mays. The deafening sounds nearly shatter my eardrums. The intermittent stuttering of light nearly blinds my eyes. I experience sensory overload. The cosmic forces swirl through space, creating a fury that disjoins reality. Through the haze I see the Phoenix screaming through space.
Jason: What’s happening?!?!
Princess: We don’t have time to figure it out now!
Tiny: Get us out of here!!!
Sheer horror is draped on the G-Force crew’s faces at the carnage surrounding them. The lifeless bodies of Hargon the Measurer, Tefral the Surveyor, Nazzar the Calculator, Gammenon the Gatherer, Arishem the Judge, Jeremiah the Analyzor, Eson the Searcher, Oneg the Prober and Ziran the Tester drift through space.
Through the obscurity I see various members of the Built (Bill) Ford Tough Team shouting in victory. A large explosion occurs and I am unable to watch further. . .
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
