The Syracuse Valley Vs. Pop-Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos

The Syracuse Valley is Mcgruff the Crime Dog, Agamemnon & Menelaus, Star Fox in an Arwing, Master Chief on a 4 Wheeler, Dash Rendar & Leebo in an AT-ST, Darth Maul, Darth Rave, Omega Red, Soundwave w/ Rumble, Frenzy, Ravage, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw, Ratbat, Overkill, Slugfest, (movie) Frenzy, Squawk Talk, & Beast Box, Casey Jones, Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello, Raphael, Splinter, Nightcrawler, Nocturne, Baby Nightcrawler, Venom, Zit, Rash, Pimple, Sonic the Hedgehog, Tails, Knuckles, Bossk, Xenomorph #91-100, Balrog #5, (movie) Megatron, (movie) Starscream, (movie) Jazz, Raiden, Kid Thunder, Mr. Game & Watch, Shang Tsung, Wonder Boy, Rayne, Wald, Beavis, Butthead, Buttchunk, Guille, Sockpin, Doogle, Rob Bartlett, Wingnut, Screwloose, Crasher, Jedi Guardian #3, Jedi Padawan #37, Scooter, Hammer Bros. #2-10, Boomerang Bros. #1-10, Fire Bros. #2-10, Giant Hammer Bros. #1-10, Kree Soldier #1-50, Navy Sailor #60-99, Moritani Soldier #1-15, Little Goomba #3-63, Sam Malone, Frank the Tank, The Dude from Quackers, Gordon Barbo, Bran, Glass Joe, Jonny Cage, Jax, Kid Chameleon, Game Boy, Wart, Mappy, Pitfall Harry, Jimmy Lee, King Hippo, Egg Plant Wizard, Homer Simpson, Black Lightning, & Ludwig Von Koopa.

The Commandos are Dave Bowman: The Starchild, General Grevious, The Colonial Marines: Apone, Hicks, Gorman, Bishop 341-B, Ferro, Dietrich, Hudson, Spunkmeyer, Drake, Frost, Crowe, & Wierbowski, Ellen Ripley, Agamemnon & Juno, Xerxes, Dante, Tllaloc, Octane, Tracks, Rodimus Prime, (movie) Blackout, Smokescreen, Venom, Ransack, Barrage, Chop Shop, Vindicator, Dr. Doom, Frank Poole, HAL 9000, Angel, Warf, Bizarro Superman, Black Adam, Paralax, Ben Kenobi, Astro-droid #19, Nightmare, Ms. Marvel, Maxima, Mary Marvel, Erasmus, Luminara Unduli, Barress Offee, Dozer #1, Iorek Birnenson, Kaja Sinis, Luna Lovegood, Dr. Fate, Darth Binks, Hanibal King, Lady Deathstrike, Ginny Weasaly, The Pretenders: Captain Latin America, Cannon Man, Bottomless Stomach & Kid Nee, Ardeth Bay, Seraphina Peckala & her daemon, Mulder & Scully, The Human Bomb, Kendra Young, Nicole Des Jardins Wakefield, Hannah Montana & Rachel Ray in the Batmobile, Ahmed Best, Lyra Belaqua w/ Pan, Will Parry w/ Kirjava, Buffy Summers, Spider Man, Leon, Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter, Jack Crowe, Rick Deckard, T-3, Shawn Ferrel, V, Riggs & Murtaugh, Dr. Grant & Ellie Sattler in a Land Speeder, Eowyn, Willow Rosenburg, Lazarus Long in an F-22, Xavier Harkonen, Judah Ben Hur, Tarful, Bail Organa, Sydney Pouttier, John Turner, Brangelina w/ Maddox, Pax, Shiloh, Zahara, Vivian, & Knox in a Ferrari 456 GT, Azeem, Starship Trooper #100, IG-88, Zam Wessell, The Herculoids: Zandar, Tarra, Dorno, Zok, Igoo, Tundro, Gloop, & Gleep, Venus & Serena Williams, Dora the Explorer, Boots, Backpack, The Map, Vorian Atreides, Prof. Henry Jones Sr., Acklay #1, Chow Yun Fat, Huma Dragonbane w/ his Red Dragon, Black Dragon #15, Original Human Torch, Blue Beetle, Bashar Miles Teg, Muhammed Ali, James Baldwin, Cole Sear, Jen Linley, & Red Dragon #1.


Jen Linley has a heart attack and dies, but it is O.K. because she has like 12 soul mates. As the 2 teams form up Darth Rave walks up to the Sith Lord that has instructed him his entire career and begins saying “My master, I understand that this may be our final battle together, so I”, but Darth Maul starts force choking his apprentice before he can finish. “Don’t get soft on me now Lord Rave, if this day should be my last than you should be thankful. Your rising above me could happen no other way”. “Lord Maul, Release him, we will be in need of his talents”! Star Fox yells to Darth Maul as he is getting in his Arwing. “Of course”. Darth Maul says as he releases his dark apprentice. Despite their different methods Star Fox and Darth Maul have formed a relationship based on respect that one would almost call a friendship. The dedication that the 2 warriors have to the art of The Sith and to the art of piloting has its similarities and the two of them cannot help but admire each other. Before the Syracuse Valley begins their charge on the well fortified force of the Commandos, Head Coach Mcgruff the Crime Dog stands up before them to say a few inspirational words. They are “Let’s take a bite out of The Commandos”. After this less than creative pep talk Assistant Coaches Menelaus and Agamemnon wave for Master Chief to say a few words before they begin. Maser Chief rides his 4 Wheeler up to the front of the pack and then stands up on the seat. He says: “Members of The Syracuse Valley, I am not great with words and will not beat around the bush, we all know that this has been a rough road to get here. Our victories have been few and far between and we have already seen too many of our friends go to the graveyard this year already. For many of us; ……. Including myself; this very well could be our last battle, and in this battle we will be up against insurmountable odds. According to many outsiders we have little to no chance of defeating the N.L. powerhouse that we are about to go up against, but that is talk that I for one, refuse to listen to. I have but no choice to believe in this team and our ability to defeat any team that attacks us. There is no doubt that if we were to lose this Death Match, that it would decimate our team in a way that no other FFL franchise has ever been decimated, but: if one way tickets to hell are our fate, THAN THE VALLEY SHALL SHOW THEM A TASTE OF HELL ON EARTH BEFORE WE GO”!!! Master Chief pumps his rifle into the air as he finishes his speech which is met by thunderous applause from his team. Master Chief then jumps back on his 4 Wheeler and starts riding in fast toward The Commandos knowing that it is going to take more than a pep rally to defeat the team he is about to attack. Mcgruff and the Assistant coaches attempt to run into battle first to rally the team but Seraphina Peckala jumps out of nowhere with her bow and arrow. She shoots Menelaus in the neck with an arrow and then catches Head Coach Mcgruff in the chest but Agamemnon hits Seraphina’s winged daemon with his sword which finishes them both off. Venom and Spider Man start squaring off with each other right away but we will come back to that while Megatron transforms into his Cybertronian jet form racing into the heart of The Commandos defensive line. The Decepticon leader transforms back into robot form, but is met by Black Adam and Mary Marvel. Megatron, though powerful underestimates the 2 worthless little rotting bags of flesh and does not see it coming as the 2 of them blast thru his chest and then rip out his moving parts with an intense ferocity, and at an amazing speed, leaving the great Megatron nothing but a pile of spare parts. All 50 Kree Soldiers form ranks to begin an offensive when Dr. Doom sees the moment he has been waiting for. He grabs a hold of his own teammate, The Human Bomb and throws him into the area where The Kree have gathered. The Kree form a circle around him, as if they are unsure what to do when, Dr. Doom, now a safe distance away targets his own teammate with some of his armor’s magic. The Human Bomb then blows up, but takes all 50 Kree Soldiers with him. Nobody on either team even attempts to interfere with the dog fight between Lazarus Long and Starscream. The F-22 that is being flown by Long and The Decepticon are nearly identical, and even though Starscream is occasionally transforming back and forth to his robot form, the 2 of them are spinning around each other so rapidly that any bystander would confuse them instantly. Starscream flies in front of Lazarus and transforms trying to blast him with his arm guns but Lazarus Long takes evasive action. The ageless Methuselah smiles to himself as he goes in to a tailspin and says “Ahhh, it’s good to be back in a real plane, I ain’t flown one of these bad boys, since I was 90”. Lazarus then ducks his plane underneath the legs of Starscream and swings back around with a missile at the ready. Lazarus then blasts Starscream in the chest with a perfectly placed missile and extinguishes his spark. The 10 Xenomorphs surround Vindicator and quickly rip apart The Alpha Fighters metal coverings, but they are met by a much more powerful opponent as The Commandos 5 Titan-Cymeks approach them. “These creatures seem slightly advanced over the humans, which we are used to stomping” Tllaloc says to his peers. “more advanced physically than the hethrigir perhaps but still nothing compared to both our intellect and ability” Agamemnon replies. But the 10 Xenomorphs work together and begin attacking Xerxes. They jump onto the Titan and start clawing and biting at the Cymek. “Only a fool like Xerxes would allow himself to be taken in a way like this”. Agamemnon says. Agamemnon then orders all of the Cymeks to take aim at the Xenomorphs on top of Xerxes. Xerxes probably would have survived the attack if the acid blood of the Xenomorphs did not eat right thru him but then Agamemnon would not have gotten his added bonus. Agamemnon the Titan then is drawn to one of the Hethrigir on the field, when he sees the original Agamemnon rushing around with his sword in hand. The Titan grabs him up the Greek with one of his mechanized claws and says to him thru his mechanized speaker box “Well, if it is not the brave (supposed) ancestor of mine whose name I have chosen as my own, I wish to tell you that I am obviously a great admirer of yours. This is truly an honor. You see, despite my amazing power you are one hethrigir that I never in a thousand years thought I would get the honor to kill”. But by the time the last word is uttered the great Greek leader is already dead from the crushing of his internal organs by the powerful cymek claw. Zam Wessell and Starship Trooper #100 are both shooting out the windows of Tracks in his flying Corvette form while they are being chased by Star Fox in his Arwing. The 2 do their best to target the Arwing but Star Fox is too good in the ship that he is just way to familiar with. Tracks tries to get away from him but Star Fox locks on to Tracks and uses his lasers to blow him out of the air. Rayne jumps out with her blades ready to do battle but Buffy and Kendra make such short work of her that it is kind of ridiculous. The 2 slayers then separate and go on small rampages. Buffy is slightly slowed down by Mr. Game & Watch but mows right thru Wald, Beavis, Butthead, and Buttchunk who barely have time to comment on how hot she is and how they can almost see her thingies before she delivers brain rattling kicks to each of their heads. At the end of her mini-kill spree she is met by Guille who looks excited at the prospect of taking on someone who just took out so many of his teammates in such a short period of time. Guille throw a Sonic Boom at her hoping she would jump over it so he could catch her with his reverse leg kick but much to his dismay she ducks under it and delivers a kick of her own to his chest. He jumps back at her but she pulls out a wooden stake and allows him to fall into it chest first on his way down. Kendra Young goes on a mini rampage of her own wiping out the dynamic duo of Sockpin and Doogle. She then makes it a Connecticut tri-fecta by cracking Bran’s neck with her bare hands. Kid Chameleon turns into his samurai form but finds that he is no match for Kendra with a sword as she quickly takes off his samurai war helmet with his head still inside. Sam Malone, Frank the Tank, The Dude from Quackers, Gordon Barbo, Homer Simpson, Navy Sailor #96 & 99, Moritani Soldier #14 have their game of quarter bounce rudely interrupted by Luminara Unduli and Barress Offee who come thru flinging their lightsabers into them on their way to do battle with the Dash Rendar Driven AT-ST. Dash and Leebo try to target the 2 Jedi but Unduli and Offee use their jedi speed to evade the laser blasts. The 2 of them then simultaneously jump on top of the 2 legged vehicle and cut their way inside. Dash tries to put up a fight but the Jedi Master and her former padawan block his hand held blaster bolts and finish off the smuggler and his droid. Master Chief blazes a trail on his 4 Wheeler, more than ready to make his last stand. He runs right over Astro Droid #19 and then shoves a wooden stake into the heart of Angel (it’s a good thing he came prepared), but Warf shoves his triple sided alien blade thing into the tire of the 4 Wheeler which sends The Syracuse Valley leader flying over the handle bars. Master Chief gets up to brush himself off while Warf moves toward him slowly from behind. Warf is about to lunge at him when Master Chief turns around with his rifle in hand and blasts Warf in the face. Master Chief then tries to shoot Ben Kenobi who is now walking toward him as well but Ben blocks the shots with his blaster. “I don’t think so” the aging Jedi Master says. So Master Chief quickly drops his gun and picks up Warf’s weapon. “I never much cared for droids, but I was beginning to take a liking to that one” Obi Wan says to Master Chief about Astro Droid #19 (who was his X-Wing co-pilot last week). “It was nothing personal” Master Chief replies. “Your Master Chief right”? Obi Wan asks. “That’s right Master Kenobi” Master Chief answers. “I see our reputations precede us, now Master Chief; you don’t really think a Jedi Master would take something personal would you”? Ben says as he rushes at Master Chief causing his lightsaber to make blue streaks in the evening air. Master Chief manages to block several of Kenobi’s attacks with Warf’s weapon but in the end it is too much for him as Ben finishes him off with a head shot. Gen. Grevious leads the Colonial Marines against Omega Red. This is this year’s first appearance for The Syracuse Valley Season 1 1st round pick and he shows off how anxious he really is by instantly grabbing a hold of Spunkmeyer and Wierzbowski with his tentacles. Omega Red’s deadly pheromones are released into the 2 marines which quickly kills them both. Omega Red then jumps right into the middle of fighting fiercely, though heavily outnumbered. Omega Red manages to take out Gorman and Ferro as well, but then the remaining marines push him back with their automatic weapons while Grevious finishes him off with 4 lightsabers to the chest. Casey Jones pulls out his goalie stick and yells “I love being a turtle”! (even though he isn’t). As Ellen Ripley launches 2 grenades into his golf bag and blows him to pieces. Dave Bowman pretends like he doesn’t care when his teammates tell him of the FFL rumors of making him this year’s MVP, but I think he is full of cosmic crap. Dave Bowman floats high above the battlefield and begins sucking up opponents as if her were a Syracuse Valley magnet. Balrog #5, Shang Tsung, Black Lightning, Egg Plant Wizard, & Jedi Guardian #3 are all brought up to the sky as if they have no physical control of their actions whatsoever. Once the 5 of them are brought there, The Starchild then simply disappears with all of them simply taking them somewhere else. Brad Pitt does not seem to mind the 6 screaming kids crammed into the small back seat of the Ferrari he is driving, but the nagging wife next to him is driving him crazy. Driving next to them is their teammates, Doctors Grant and Sattler who are having the following conversation: Grant says as he is pointing to the Ferrari “Look at that, you would really still want kids after seeing that fiasco, I can hear them thru the rolled up windows, I mean, come on way to find a way to ruin a drive in a Ferrari”. Ellie replies “Not all kids, Dr. Grant are quite so unruly. You of all people being a scientist should be able to deduce that having that many kids is the problem”. “One or a thousand, I don’t care. It’s all too many”. “Oh Dr. Grant, you are so intriguing, this isn’t about you being jealous because you didn’t get to drive the Ferrari is it”? Ellie asks. Grant replies, “No way, are you kidding me, this Land Speeder is great. As far as I am concerned wheels are extinct (Har-dee har har, giggles all around). Back in the Ferrari: Angelina yells “STOP! DAMMIT BRAD, I said stop! Turn the car around”. “Why what’s the problem”? Brad asks. “WHAT???? Don’t you what’s the problem me turn the damn car around. Didn’t you see that kid back there” Angelina says. “No, what kid. We’re in the middle of a battle here” Brad says. Angelina replies with “So what, there were many battles going on when we kidnapped, I mean adopted Zahara and Vivian”. “We didn’t adopt Vivian” Brad interrupts. “Didn’t I tell you to shut up” Angelina says as she is getting out of the now stopped car. She walks up to Raiden who is with his sidekick Kid Thunder and asks if she can adopt his son but as this is happening Dr. Grant swerves out of the way of Ardeth Bay who is fighting King Hippo and rear ends the stopped Ferrari that Brad has not so intelligently just left parked in the middle of the Battlefield, killing everyone in both vehicles. Angelina shrugs her shoulders and says to Raiden “you see how dangerous this world is, you should let me take your little boy away from here”. But instead Raiden decides to fry her with his lightning powers. Xavier Harkonen uses a small EMP charge on Jazz to disable him while he gets Vorian Atreides, Miles Teg, and Muhammad Ali to help him take the Autobot apart. Rodimus Prime, Smokescreen, Blackout, and Octane surround Soundwave. Rodimus says in his ultimate good guy voice “give yourself up Soundwave”. But Soundwave ejects his tapes and orders them to attack. Soundwave and his original tapes know that this may be their final battle for the Syracuse Valley but they are prepared to go down fighting. Blackout stomps both Slugfest and Overkill into the ground but Lazerbeak and Buzzsaw both use their eye lasers to take down the much bigger Decepticon. Smokescreen grabs a hold of (movie) Frenzy and rips him apart but Ravage jumps onto his stomach and knocks him down, while Ratbat is killed trying to help out with his razor sharp metal teeth. Soundwave then finishes off the Autobot with a laser blast to the chest. Rodimus punches thru the body of Squawk Box on the way to Soundwave who he punches in the chest breaking the cover where his tapes are ejected from and then throwing him on the ground. Rodimus then uses his side arm lasers to blast into the opened stomach of Soundwave and finish him off for good. “NOOOOOO, not Soundwave” Rumble yells as he and Frenzy jump onto the chest of Rodimus Prime and begin pounding there piston converted arms into his chest until the Autobot leader is dead. Octane pulls Ravage off of the dead shell of Smokescreen and breaks the electrode in his neck but he is then killed by the 4 remaining and very enraged tapes. Spider Man has been fighting Venom all this time but Venom is starting to gain the upper hand. Venom is about to bring his powerful hands down onto the neck of Spiderman when he blasted by a shot of magic from the wand of Harry Potter. With just a little help from his friend Harry (no, not that friend Harry, Harry Potter) Spider Man is able to gain the upper hand and finish off Venom once and for all. Will, Kirjava, Lyra, & Pan are having a blast & racking up mad bonus points by jumping on the heads of The Little Goombas, but when Will and Pan both miss and get hit by the fangs of the little whatever they-ares it kills all 4 of them. Jack Crowe and Rick Deckard learn how it is done though and avenge their little friends by finishing off the last 8 Goombas on their way to help V and Riggs & Murtaugh fight the 14 remaining Moritani Soldiers. The Moritani activate their shields but Bashar Miles Teg has taught everybody on The Commandos enough about shield fighting to know at least the basics. V is already great with knives so he has no problem taking out 6 of them on his own, before he is stabbed by the Moritani #3 & 8 combo. Murtaugh is killed by Moritani #1 but Riggs, Crowe, & Deckard manage to take out the rest of them. Moritani #1 is then thought to be dead but is sneaking up on the Commandos waiting for the perfect time to strike, when Shawn Ferrell rushes in to heal V. Once V comes to he throws his knife, not at the Moritani because he knows that the thrown blade will not get thru his shield but to Riggs who catches it and then allows the slow blade to penetrate the shield and kill the final Moritani Soldier. Glass Joe, Jax, and Jonny Cage’s shirtless bodies are glistening in the moonlight as Paralax flies by filling their hearts with fear and their bodies with death. Ardeth Bay won the fight against King Hippo by the way, for all you people who were still on the edge of your seat about it. Darth Maul decides that it is his time to go off as he sheds his black cloak and ignites his double-bladed lightsaber. The 4 giant Insecticons stand on the ground in their Insect form ready for the attack but Darth Maul jumps in to the air and onto the shoulder of Ransack cutting thru his neck. In the blink of an eye Darth Maul jumps from one Insecticon to the next until he is surrounded by the rubble of all 4 of them. Dr. Doom walks up slowly to Maul and says “impressive, Sith warrior you must truly be one of a kind”. “Hmmm, perhaps” Darth Maul says as his apprentice Darth Rave stealthily sneaks up behind Dr. Doom and kills him just as his master had instructed him telepathically. T-3 marches in to battle blowing apart Wingnut and Screwloose, and then stomping Wonder Boy into the ground. But the Arnold look alike Terminator is blown away by Star Fox on a strafing run in his Arwing. Star Fox swings back around to then do it again when his Arwing is clipped by a cannon from the head of cannon man. Star Fox ejects out in the nick of time but his crashing Arwing takes out both Ahmed Best and Pitfall Harry which is unfortunate because they were in the middle of an epic battle. Rob Bartlett seems honored and looks almost happy as he blown away by the wand of Dumbledore. Dumbledore then squares off against Raiden and Kid Thunder. Raiden conjures up all of the electrical power he can but it is easily blocked by the master wizard. Dumbledore directs it back at him with his wand and then adds a spell of his own to take out the Thunder god and his sidekick. Dumbledore does not stop there though as he sends a shot of magic right thru the screen of Game Boy and then vaporizes Wart. Splinter then stealthily jumps out and kicks Dumbledore’s wand out of his hand. Splinter kicks Dumbledore over but Harry flies by on his broomstick and grabs Dumbledore’s wand off of the ground. He then flies overhead and drops the wand to his headmaster allowing Dumbledore to blast Splinter in the chest and finish him off. Bizarro, Nightmare, Ms. Marvel, & Maxima land in front of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to do battle. Although the Ninja Turtles fight much better as a team than the opponents they are up against, they are simply out powered and out-classed by the super heroes as they are one by one taken out by the 4 of them. It is much the same story for The Battletoads as Zit is mauled to death by Iorek Byrnison and Rash is decapitated by the lightsaber of Kaja Sinis. Pimple on the other hand is killed by the wand of Luna Lovegood. Bossk jumps out with his blaster rifle drawn but is met by Dr. Fate. Dr. Fate changes Bossk’s gun into a water bottle and then changes him into a ream of paper. Hannah Montana and Rachel Ray are cruising around in the bat-mobile where the following conversation is taking place. “Like yeah right, no way. There is no way that your voice is raspier or more recognizable than mine is”. Hannah says to the licensed driver allowing her to use her learner’s permit. “O.K., whatever. This is why I only have dogs, and not kids”. They are about to continue arguing further when they notice that they are being chased by Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles. “EEEEEEEEEEE” Miley screams, in true teenage girl fashion at the oncoming sight of anything while in an automobile. Rachel Ray then starts randomly pushing buttons on the dash of the batmobile one of which ignites the rocket boost on the back which sends them going even faster but also burns Knuckles to a crisp due to the fact that he was right behind the booster trying to get on the back of the car. Despite the new speed boost Sonic and Tails still stay with car but Rachel Ray activates the machine guns which riddle Sonic with bullets. Rachel then drops a bomb out of the back of the Batmobile but Tails quickly picks it up and sticks it into the wheel well. Tails then spins his tails around to start flying and watches the Batmobile blow up from the air. Hanibal King, Lady Deathstrike, & Azeem attack The Nightcrawlers and Nocturne. The 3 of them teleport all over the place avoiding there attacks but eventually Lady Deathstrike manages to stick Nocturne in the neck so she can then lend a hand to Hanibal King in finishing off Nightcrawler. Azeem says a quick prayer to himself after he kills Baby Nightcrawler, as he has know idea what matter of little demon he just killed. Despite being not as muscular as the 2 of them, Jimmy Lee faces off against The Williams Sisters. Venus and Serena rush at him with their rackets but Jimmy first drop kicks Venus out of the way before he beats the crap out of Serena. Once Venus comes to she is know match for Jimmy on her own. Crasher crashes into Cannonman, but Capt. Latin America throws his shield threw the head of Scooter. Crasher then transforms into her robot form and steps on Kid Nee. A furious Bottomless Stomach then eats Crasher’s foot in retaliation which makes the her an easy target for Capt. Latin America to finish off. Mulder and Scully figure out that Mappy is useless which kills him while he collecting Easter baskets for Mapico. Nicole Des Jardins Wakefield emanates girl power as she leads Eowyn and Willow against the 10 Giant Hammer Bros. Eowyn somersaults between 2 of them making them hit each other with their hammers and then stabs another one in the chest. Nicole jumps on the head of one but when she tries to do it a second time she finds she had some beginners luck as he pulls out a hammer just before she lands and kills her. Willow unleashes some of her magic and then easily finishes off the other 4. Huma Dragonbane atop his Red Dragon leads Red Dragon #1, Black Dragon #15, and Zok against the 40 Navy Sailors. The Navy Sailors shoot at the underbellies of the dragons with their M-16’s but they don’t do as much damage as they desired. Zok uses his laser tail and eyes to take out 15 of the sailors while Black Dragon #15 covers another 15 of them with its acid breath. After a ridiculous amount of shells are fired The Navy Sailors bring down both of the Red Dragons but not before they use their fire breath to take out a total of 8 of the Sailors. Huma then rolls off of his dragon with his sword in hand and in one quick movement finishes off the 2 remaining Sailors (#62 & 88). After the Syracuse Valley still found themselves short of the desired roster needs for this week’s epic match Ludwig Von Koopa was picked up to fulfill the need. Ludwig in no way minds being on the team and is anxious to earn a permanent spot after being a hero without a home for so long now. He jumps in, and lands directly on Tarra’s head instantly killing her. Zandor and Dorno are anxious to avenge the rampaging Koopa but they are quickly crushed by Bowser’s oldest son as well. It is not until Igoo brings his rock ape hands down onto the neck of Ludwig (three times) that the Koopa is eventually stopped. Prof. Henry Jones Sr. is busy discussing the importance of foreign language in school with Dora and Boots when they are attacked by Boomerang Bros. They quickly take cover under his umbrella but that only deflects one Boomerang. Boomerang Bros. #1 throws his boomerang at Backpack which defeats it but also gets stuck inside of leaving the Boomerang Bros. defenseless for Prof. Jones to (somewhat clumsily) jump on its head. In a last ditch effort Dora consults the map who tells her, Boots, and Dr. Jones to go around the secret way on the ridge. Once they listen to the map to the map to the map to the map to the maaaaaaaap they go back around and find themselves above the 9 remaining Boomerang Bros. This then allows them to easily jump on the heads of the Boomerang Bros. to kill them all. (They did it. They did it they did it hooray. They read the map and they killed the Boomerang Bros. and they did it they did it they did it hooray………….. They________ did it)! Cole Sear sees himself as The Fire Bros. nail him with fire balls but they then find that there fire powers are not as great as they thought as they are easily over-powered by the android Human Torch with some help from Blue Beetle. Chow Yun Fat, James Baldwin (who doesn’t make it out of the fight) and Acklay #1 take a more melee approach as they fight the 9 Hammer Bros. Chow Yun Fat leaps on to the heads of Hammer #2 & 9, with Baldwin taking out #3. The Acklay lets the hammers bounce off of him while he rips the other 6 Hammer Bros. limb from limb. Darth Maul calls his team back together to make their last stand. Darth Maul is not one for words, or even for leadership for that matter so he simply looks back at his team of Star Fox, Darth Rave, Rumble, Frenzy, Lazerbeak, Buzzsaw, Tails, & Jimmy Lee and nods before he runs in toward the much larger force of the Commandos. He uses a force push to rip apart HAL 9000, kills Darth Binks without even breaking stride and then uses his Sith rage to help push his lightsaber thru the thick skin of Black Adam, before Ben Kenobi; backed up by Luminara Unduli, Barress Offee, and Kaja Sinis all with their lightsabers drawn finally finish off the Sith Lord. Darth Rave runs up to grab the double-bladed lightsaber of his fallen master but is quickly dispatched by Kaja Sinis before he can pick it up. Star Fox, compelled by the death of one he admired so much (Darth Maul) yells “Let’s go Valley as he picks up Maul’s lightsaber and sticks it into the gut of Capt. Latin America and then decapitates The Bottomless Stomach. Bail Organa blasts Fox Mcleod in the chest but his battle cry is well received as Rumble and Frenzy lead the other 2 tapes against Angel and Kendra who are only able to take out Laserbeak (killed by Angel) and Buzzsaw (killed by Kendra) before they die. Dumbledore has to conjur up an amazing amount of magic in order to put down the rampaging Rumble. While it takes a full blast of Agamemnon’s artillery to take down Frenzy. Buffy snaps the neck of Jimmy Lee, but Tails still can’t be caught. The crazy little Fox spin kills Leon to death and then tries to do the same to Juda Ben Hur but although he is knocked off his chariot Juda manages to finish off the tough little furry competitor with his sword.
POP-SUPERSTAR HANNAH MONTANA & PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA’S “BEST OF BOTH WORLDS” TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDOS ARE VICTORIOUS!