Consortium: Week 3

THE BATTLE OF THE ZACHARSKIS!!!!

John and Vader's House of Sith Aids Vs. TEAM

The Sith Aids are:

1. King Laufey (54pts)

2. Zombie Iceman (30pts)

3. King Cold

4. Freiza

5. Cooler

(As a group 30pts)

6. Snow Trooper#26 (6pts)

7. Snow Trooper#27 (6pts)

8. Snow Trooper#28 (6pts)

9. Snow Trooper#29 (6pts)

10. Snow Trooper#30 (6pts)

11. Sub-Zero (23pts)

12. Vampire Darth Vader (60pts)

13. Anakin Skywalker (45pts)

14. Darth Maul (45pts)

15. Boba Fett (32pts)

16. Ashoka Tano: Rebel (29pts)

17. Kanan Jarrus

18. Ezra Bridger

19. Zeb

20. Sabine Wren

21. Hera Syndulla

22. Chopper (C1-10P)

(As a team 70pts)

23. Piccolo (20pts)

24. Eeth Koth (32pts)

1. Frost Giant#1

2. Frost Giant#2

3. Frost Giant#3

4. Frost Giant#4

5. Frost Giant#5

6. Frost Giant#6

7. Parademon#1

8. Parademon#2

9. Parademon#3

10. Parademon#4

11. Parademon#5
12. Parademon#6

13. Parademon#7

14. Parademon#8

15. Parademon#9

16. Parademon#10

17. Eagle#1

18. Eagle#2

19. Eagle#3

20. Eagle#4

21. Eagle#5

22. Eagle#6

23. Eagle#7

24. Dark Side Marauder#13

25. Dark Side Marauder#14

26. Dark Side Marauder#15

27. Dark Side Marauder#16
28. Dark Side Marauder#17

29. Dark Side Marauder#18

30. Dark Side Marauder#19

31. Dark Side Marauder#20

32. Snow Trooper#31

33. Gondor Soldier#1

34. Gondor Soldier#2

35. Gondor Soldier#3

36. Gondor Soldier#4

37. Gondor Soldier#5

38. Gondor Soldier#6

39. Green Dragon#22

40. Green Dragon#24

41. Green Dragon#25

42. Green Dragon#26

43. Red Dragon#28

44. Red Dragon#29

45. Red Dragon#30

46. Griffin#1

47. Griffin#2

48. Griffin#3

49. Griffin#4

50. Griffin#5

Vehicles: AT-AT and AT-ST (I want the snow troopers to pilot them)



TEAM is:

Luke Skywalker
Padawan Obi Wan Kenobi
Lowbacca
Yareal Poof
Depa Billaba
Lor Zod (Chris Kent)
Crime Syndicate: Owlman
Crime Syndicate: Power Ring
Crime Syndicate: Johnny Quick
Crime Syndicate: White Martian
Crime Syndicate: Blood Eagle
Blue Beetle
The Apocalypse Twins: Uriel
The Apocalypse Twins: Eimen
Wonder Boy (w/ Atlas)
Mamaw
Papaw
Bama
Plumpy
John Williams


50 Free commons:

Neo-Cymek #1
Neo-Cymek #2
Neo-Cymek #3
Neo-Cymek #4
Neo-Cymek #5
Neo-Cymek #6
Neo-Cymek #7
Neo-Cymek #8
Neo-Cymek #9
Neo-Cymek #10
Neo-Cymek #11
Neo-Cymek #12
Neo-Cymek #13
Neo-Cymek #14
Neo-Cymek #15
Neo-Cymek #16
Neo-Cymek #17
Cybertronian Guardian #1
Cybertronian Guardian #2
Cybertronian Guardian #3
Cybertronian Guardian #4
Cybertronian Guardian #5
Cybertronian Guardian #6
Cybertronian Guardian #7
Nightsister Sith Witch #19
Jedi Master #8
Krayt Dragon #5
Force Adept #5
Sith Lord #6 (Darth Fuzzy)
Sith Lord #7 (Darth Cocky)
Dark Jedi Master #11
Jedi Master #32A
Jedi Master #16B
Jedi Knight #39B
Jedi Knight #40B
No Ship Futar #1
No Ship Futar #2
No Ship Futar #3
Sharkticon #47
Sharkticon #48
Sharkticon #49
Sharkticon #50
Cock Sneak Goomba #1
Cock Sneak Goomba #2
Cock Sneak Goomba #3
Cock Sneak Goomba #4
Cock Sneak Goomba #5
Cock Sneak Goomba #6
Cock Sneak Goomba #7
Cock Sneak Goomba #8


In a vote of 4 to 2.....

Season 9, Week 3 Match: George Washington's Slaves vs. Real Man's Rabblerousers

“Darth Shemalyah tested her apprentices, Nik Landsoh and Brek Nyram, by exposing them to the extremes of the galaxy’s harshest environments.  Whether it was the frigid temperatures of Mygeeto or the suffocating heat of Sullust, her acolytes needed to perform to her extreme standards.

                                    Sith Holocron –unearthed in Sector 2356.

I look upon the teams which will do battle in this Season 9, Week 3 Match located on Hoth.  They are as follows:

George Washington’s Slaves: Darth Shemalyah, Nik Landsoh, Brek Nyram, Ymir, Loki, Wally “WallyKazam” Trollman with Norville the Dragon, Vapor Man, Meteor Man, Gravity Girl, Zorak, Thunderstick, BuzzSaw, Bart Simpson, Lisa Simpson and Marge Simpson, Jedi Masters #4-7, #10-19, #1C-23C and Starship Troopers #7-18.

Real Man’s Rabblerousers: Runabout and Runamuck, Movie Dreads: Crankcase, Crowbar and Hatchet, Trailbreaker, Junkeons #13-14, Movie Wreckers: Leadfoot, Roadbuster and Topspin, Movie Skids, Movie Mudflap, Vehicle Voltron – Air Team: Commander Jeff, Rocky, Wolo, Chip and Ginger, The Losers: Aisha, Clay, Jenson, Pooch, Roque and Cougar, Darth Desolous and Darth Zannah, Transformers Mech Units: Duke, Snake Eyes, Scarlett and Roadblock, Ghosts #2-7, Hammer Bros. #17, 19, 20, 21 and 22, Dark Side Adepts #7-12, Jedi Masters #29, 9, 34, 35 and 50A and Rebel Trooper #1.

Let the battle begin. . .

The Slaves’ locker room door slowly climbs and the frigid temperature rips through the bodies of the warriors.  Darth Shemalyah stands before the entire squad, her two apprentices directly behind her. 

Darth Shemalyah:  Flawless.

Brek Nyram and Nik Landsoh (bow and respond in unison):  As you wish, our Master.

It is only a short period of time before the frozen and desolate wasteland of Hoth is littered with combatants from the Star Wars universe.  Upon a closer look at the scene, it is clear that these figures are known to the league as “commons.”  The Slaves’ Jedi Masters #4-7, 10-19 and 1C-23C take the field.  Meanwhile, the Rabblerousers’ ordinaries consist of Dark Side Adepts #7-12 and Jedi Masters #29, 9, 34, 35 and 50A. 

Darth Desolous and Darth Zannah ignite their lightsabers and the duo fight with the entire Jedi Master crew of the Slaves.  A fury of multi-colored blades crash and spark as the common fighters battle the two Sith.  Meanwhile, Landsoh and Nyram have joined the skirmish and focus on the Rabblerousers’ Dark Side Adepts #7-12 and Jedi Masters #29, 9, 34, 35 and 50A.  At the end of the struggle, only Darth Desolous, Darth Zannah, Nik Landsoh and Brek Nyram remain; four red blades waiting to be utilized, once again.  Landsoh and Nyram look back to see their master, her face a stoic mask.  Darth Shemalyah nods and the two acolytes rush toward Desolous and Zannah.  Nyram exchanges blows with Desolous, while Landsoh scuffles with Zannah.  In the end, Nyram and Landsoh are left standing, both without a scratch.  Darth Shemalyah smiles.

Across the tundra, the G.I. Joe Transformer Mech Units controlled by Duke, Snake Eyes, Scarlett and Roadblock clash with Starship Troopers #7-18.  The Troopers may be viable candidates to fight bugs, but they are no match for the fortified armor and advanced weaponry of the Mech Units.  All of the Slaves’ troopers are slaughtered in a matter of moments. 

Hammer Brothers #17, 19, 20, 21 and 22 focus their projectiles on the Simpsons.  Bart Simpson uses his skateboard (modified to a snowboard) to bat back the hammers thrown by #17 and 20, which, in turn, strike and kill #21.  Marge Simpson’s hair is shredded as #19 and 22 strike their mark.  She is then killed when her maternal instincts kick in and she ineffectually attempts to protect Lisa.  Both are killed by hammers crushing their yellow heads. Bart becomes enraged at his family’s deaths and characteristically snowboards between the Hammer Brothers as he does between the Springfield inhabitants on a weekly basis.  Bart kills #17 and 22 with his slingshot projectiles and Zorak races to the scene, killing the remaining Brothers; all Hammers are dead.  Zorak grabs onto Bart and the two snowboard across the snow to the next battle.

The Rabblerousers’ ghostly apparitions fly toward Darth Shemalyah, who remains behind the lines of the major battles.  Ghosts #2-7 whip around Shemalyah in a frenetic and agitated state.  Ghost #3 strikes Darth Shemalyah to the ground.  Shemalyah’s red eyes blaze at being struck by a common entity.  The Sith slowly rises.  Shemalyah closes her eyes and her mouth opens.  A torrential, wind-enhanced tornado sucks the Ghosts into her body.  Darth Shemalyah falls to the ground, once again, as a storm rages within her body.  A ghastly scream is heard from the lips of the woman and the Sith stands.  She opens her mouth and lets out an immense belch.  Ghosts #2-7 are no longer in existence. 

Bart Simpson and Zorak snowboard down the frozen hills of Hoth.  Shots ring out.  The head’s of Simpson and Zorak explode and a spray of both blood and brain matter float across the snowy ground below.  The two fall dead to the ground, the snowboard coming to a halt at the end of the hill which the two traversed upon.  The Losers, almost fifty yards from the site, look at one another – mission accomplished.    Aisha, Clay, Jenson, Pooch, Roque and Cougar slowly walk to their next fight.  The team is soon met by the Galaxy Trio of Vapor Man, Meteor Man and Gravity Girl.  The Losers spray bullets at the trio, to no avail.  Vapor Man transforms into his gaseous state; Meteor Man decreases his size and Gravity Girl bends the laws of gravity so that the bullets consistently miss their targets.  The trio then reacts as Meteor Man increases the size of his right arm and hand, striking and instantly killing Aisha and Roque.  Gravity Girl focuses her powers on Clay and Pooch, lifting their bodies hundreds of feet off the ground and dropping them to their deaths.  Vapor Man uses the cold environment to his advantage and produces a freeze vapor from his hands, killing Cougar and Jenson. 

Movie Skids and Mudflap are bickering amongst one another in a stereotypical way – as twin brothers often do.  They notice Wally “WallyKazam” Trollman with Norville the Dragon skirting along the snow.  The Transformers dispatch with the children’s characters in only a matter of seconds and high five each other, celebrating their ludicrous victory over the duo. 

An enraged Ymir enters the battlefield.  The Frost Giant progenitor immediately begins to dismantle Junkeons #13 and 14.  Ymir then focuses on the Transformer Mech Units.  Although Snake Eyes and Duke’s units are able to wound the behemoth, Ymir dispels with both Roadblock and Scarlett’s machinery as well as the controllers themselves.  Ymir falls to his knees at the repeated onslaught of Snake Eyes and Duke.  The G.I. Joes are about to deal their death blows when the duo suddenly succumbs to massive confusion at the state of current events.  The two fighters fire upon each other, destroying their own teammates.  The entire G.I. Joe carnage litters the ground and as Ymir rises to see what has actually transpired, he hears the laughter of the Trickster God.  Loki materializes out of thin air and nods to Ymir.

Thunderstick stands with Buzz Saw against a formidable Transformer force.  Although the two fight valiantly, they are simply no match for the Transformer Dreads: Crankcase, Crowbar and Hatchet, along with the assistance of Trailbreaker. 

The Galaxy Trio come together and utilizes their powers to their full extent, managing to defeat and destroy Runabout and Runamuck.  The three then face the Transformer Movie Wreckers: Leadfoot, Roadbuster and Topspin, as well as Vehicle Voltron.  Although the Trio manages to somewhat dismantle Vehicle Voltron by destroying the parts run by Wolo and Ginger, they all eventually perish in the melee. 

Moments pass as Darth Shemalyah, Nik Landsoh, Brek Nyram, Ymir and Loki stand side-by-side, anticipating the final battle about to commence.  The Slaves face the remaining Rabblerousers, being the Movie Dreads, Movie Wreckers, Movie Skids, Movie Mudflap, a partially effective Vehicle Voltron and Rebel Trooper #1, who stands behind his mechanical teammates.  In an epic battle, Ymir uses his strength and weaponry to destroy Mudflap and Skids, who attempt to spew a few snarky comments before being destroyed.  Ymir soon becomes winded at the effort expended and falls to the combined forces of the immense Movie Dreads and Wreckers. 

Loki, once again, uses his skills to mess with the minds of remaining Vehicle Voltron members.  Instead of becoming the entity necessary to finish off the Slaves, they, instead remain entirely separated and take each other out systematically, with the assistance of the lightsaber wielding efforts of Nyram and Landsoh. 

Trailbreaker fronts the Transformer Dreads and Wreckers.  Darth Shemalyah steps to the front of her team and disrobes her cloak.  Her hands begin to manipulate the air around her.  

Darth Shemalyah:  Magneto. . .

The Sith’s hands twist and the immense Transformers creak, crumple, bend and ultimately are crushed into a single balled construct of metal.  Shemalyah then opens her hands and what is left of the Transformers rip apart and explode across the land, missing the Slaves’ team in its remaining entirety.   

Shemalyah: . . .has nothing on me.

Rebel Trooper #1 is brought to Darth Shemalyah by Nyram and Landsoh.  Rebel Trooper #1 is thrown to the ground. 

Darth Shemalyah:  You shall tell all who listen that this league is now Darth Shemalyah’s.  All who oppose shall fall.  It is the time of the Slaves.  

Rebel Trooper #1 looks in shock that he is being allowed to live.

Landsoh:  But this is a death match!

Nyram stands before the trooper and slices his head off with his lightsaber.

Nyram:  You have to follow the rules!  You are not above them!

Shemalyah:  No rules apply to me.  I am above all!

Shemalyah ignites her saber and cuts into both Nyram and Landsoh, dealing them both critical wounds.  As the apprentices’ lives drip from their bodies, they hear the gutteral voice of their master.

Shemalyah:  Flawless you were, but never. . .  question. . .  me.  Never.

Darth Shemalyah turns her back and meets Loki.

Darth Shemalyah:  I will bed you.

Loki smiles as the two walk off to the locker room.

 

 

Rosters are here!

So the other day Josh called me and he was all like "Yo, Fizz.  I just hacked into the Google mainframe and rerouted the GUI interface using a backend firewall and Visual Basic and I think I found a brilliant way to get the rosters on the website updated in REAL TIME."

And I was all like "That tech shit doesn't even make sense. But I like where your head is at with the rosters"

So me and Josh pulled an all-nighter drinking Jolt cola and eating Cold-n-Nasty pizza and just as the morning light began to lay her blanket of warmth on our tired faces, we had done it.

Behold, The new Rosters Page!  http://fantasyfantasyleague.blogspot.com/p/rosters.html

This page contains links to each team's individual roster page that has real time updates of your roster as soon as they are updated.  Through the magic of the cloud and the power of the interwebs!

So click that link above or use the new updated "Rosters" link on the sidebar ( OVER THERE --> ) where I explain the roster pages with a little more detail.  Holler below if you have any questions/issues/suggestions/complements.

Have a blessed day.

Season 9, Week 2: B3 vs. The Super Kitties

The Super Kitties are: Godzilla, Seaworms 7 & 8, Sharkticons #27-30, Ice Bros. 8 & 9 on an amphibious ATV, Ice Bros. #10, Kingdom Come Aquaman, Sharkboy, and Mogwai #2.
B3 is: Aquaman, Topo, Karaquan, Llyron, Bloodtide, Dragonrider, Manowar, Sea Leopard, 2 Headed Shark, Black Lantern Mephisto, and Beta Ray Bill.

Alone together in the waters of Otah Gungah, the Super Kitties were growing impatient. Kingdom Come Aquaman and Sharkboy patrolled the depths with waning vigilance; Godzilla’s stomach roared out in hunger, sending tremors through the water’s surface. The deep growl sounded ominously woodchipper-esque. “We’ve waited long enough!” proclaimed KC Aquaman. “The enemy is clearly not going to show, where is Daveatu and our default victory?” Sharkboy surfaced beside him. “Daveatu? Dude, we’re gonna be here forever. Why are they still letting him Watch?” I cast my reflection in the water before them. “Probably because I'm a certified badass and all you grow up to be is a sparkly werewolf or something.”
“I'm Sharkboy, not Taylor Lautner.”
“You're a butt pirate. Where’s the Beckerteam?” I asked. Shark-jerk rolled his eyes. “They didn't show, shouldn't you know that?”
“What? No, that's not right, Beckerman said they were sent. I have an idea, follow me.”
A few… crap, what are ocean-miles measured in again? A few dozen of those away, a hideous cube of pink fleshiness floated in the water. Nearly the size of Godzilla’s head, the thing stank of sweat and processed meat. I recognized it immediately. “Anybody smaller than Godzilla better stand back. This is a wild Spam Filter, made from potted meat and clammy malice. It serves an important role in keeping things clean, but occasionally it catches something important. Looks like it sucked up B3, they're still alive in there but it's definitely gonna take me an extra… 5 days tops to get this match sorted out and-” Sharkboy’s claws and teeth appeared as his rage grew. “Now you're just screwing with us!” I threw up my water-reflection-hands. “You want to cry about it? Fine! You figure it out, go crazy bro!” I left their presence. I really was just screwing with them, I knew they'd figure it out fast. The whole team was in uproar, shouting amongst each other and cursing my name, it was great. Godzilla, hangry from lack of charred opponent snacks, grabbed the heinous wad of “meat” in his jaws. He began to thrash his head wildly in an attempt to bite through the rubbery prison, seemingly in vain, until a moist crackling sound sputtered out of the Spam Filter. Godzilla looked proud, at first, then confused, then disgusted as a pinkish ooze began to fill his mouth from lesions in the damaged cube. He spat the mass out as the ooze pushed through, straining harder and harder against the oily flesh of the thing until it finally tore apart, all at once being replaced by the rapidly growing Manowar. Free from the horrors of the Spam Filter, he shrunk back to release the teammates who had become engulfed in his expansive escape. “Thank you, Manowar. Let’s never speak of this again”, Said Aquaman as he brushed off some sticky residue from either Manowar or the SPAM™ brand meat substitute. Reacting quickly, the Ice Bros on the ATV and the one resting up on Daddy Godzilla’s shoulder began to hurl icy death at the Jellyfish-Man. The cold gradually began to stiffen his membranous surface, but he responded by lashing out at the ATV with a heavy swing of a tentacle. The ATV exploded more dramatically than might be realistic, I don't know how dramatically ATVs typically explode. As Ice Bro #10 continued to pelt Manowar from above, the Super Kitties’ four Sharkticons rose up from below to begin tearing at him. As the other Fathom Four rushed to aid him, the Seaworms began to crash in and out of the water around their fight. Black Lantern Mephisto, seemingly unconcerned with the heat of the battle around him, was holding Mogwai #2 in one hand. “Oh right, these things. Better keep this one dry” he said as he incinerated the fluffy little gremlin. Beta Ray Bill went after Godzilla, finding him to be more resilient than expected. He managed to bash the remaining Ice Bro off the lizard’s shoulder, but in a fatal error, he tried to swing for Godzilla’s face but found himself torched and chomped out of the air, the first victim to Godzilla's powerful munchies.Sharkboy was caught in Topo’s tightening grip, but he began to viciously chew through the octopuses arms, quickly bleeding him out. As for the Fathom Five, they took out the Sharkticons and seaworms but at the cost of their own lives. Kingdom Come Aquaman and regular-type Aquaman had sought each other out, each seeking to prove himself as the one true Aquaman. “You think you're a true ruler of Atlantis?” KC asked as they clashed. “You and your whole team were sucked up by some ridiculous sea-spam before the battle had even begun.” Aquaman Classic gave a sharp glare. “Not the whole team.” Two Headed Shark burst out on Aquaman’s mental cue, swallowing Sharkboy whole before proceeding to harass Godzilla. Godzilla wouldn't be showed up by such a laughable creature, and he grabbed it from the water to grab a bite out of it. “Is that all you've got?” KC Aquaman scoffed. “Not even close” said Aquaman. From deeper down still, a terrible groan was uttered that sent large bubbles floating to the surface. The Karaquan made his appearance all at once, completely overwhelming the unprepared Godzilla. KC Aquaman yelled out in fury and delivered a killing blow to Aquaman. As he turned to the Karaquan, he was met with instead by the face of Black Lantern Mephisto, who seized him by the throat before everything went black.

Season 9: Week 2: Charles Barkley's Turrible Decisions -vs- Moist Mafia

Charles Barkley’s Turrible Decisions are: Oceanus, Phoenix Force Namor, Krakoa, The Argo carrying/ Argonauts #1-6, Nerkodd: Breaker of Oceans, Nightsister Sith Witch #1, Pete Sosa, Dark Jedi, Destroyer Submarine carrying/ Navy Seal Chiefs #14 & 15 and 45, 48-50.

Moist Mafia is: Indigo Lantern John Stewart, Blue Lantern Kyle Raynor, Killer Shark, Jar Jar Binks, Xenomorph #52 “Snoogans”, Saint of Killers, Gammenon the Gatherer, Xebel Soldier #3 & 4.

“Well look at that tasty glass of water just going to waste. I think I need to get my hands on that thing.”

-Tom Bailey, Regular Customer at Bob’s Diner

Bob’s diner, the only restaurant on Krakoa, the new island in the middle of Otah Gungah, suddenly appeared a month ago to the surprise of everybody on Naboo. The lonely diner has found it difficult to find many customers, especially considering it is four miles out in the middle of the Nabooian Sea. Bob, the caretaker of the establishment figured he would be an early adopter on the new piece of real estate, that as far as he was concerned, was not owned by anybody as of yet. The real estate near the capital city of Theed was unaffordable to even the savviest business man, making the sudden appearance of the island in the middle of the sea a very exciting business venture.

The difficult thing with starting a business is attracting new cliental, something made even more troublesome with the long journey out to the island, something nobody outside of Tom Bailey had made yet. Tom Bailey was a retired security guard for the Senator of Naboo, twenty five years of service in the military and he was out. Now Bob, who never married, had nothing but time on his hands. When he heard about a new diner opening up on the newly risen island in the middle of the Otah Gungah sea, he figured he had to see it for himself.

Tom, a very careful and organized man in his work life, had quickly devolved into a reckless vagabond merely weeks after his retirement. Where the professional version of Tom would have prepared for his journey with multiple tanks of fuel and a months worth of rations, the retired iteration of Tom did none of these things. Day five on the island has left him broke and stuck on the island, hoping that Bob would be willing to feed him. A glass of water, something that he had always taken for granted, was now a luxury. Luckily for Tom, Bob had nothing but time and extra food on his hands, something that Tom was forever grateful for.

After spending yet another sad afternoon in the diner together alone, a loud explosion outside of the diner awoke their curiosity, sending both Tom and Bob outside to see what was going on. To their amazement, there was a battle going on right outside their door. Land and sea were both erupting in violence, a massive ship cracked in half, purple and blue blasts crashed into its now broken hull. A short way from the diner, a man in a beat up long jacket and hat stood looking out towards the sea, only to have a submarine brought out of the water and violently brought down on the rough Krakoian earth. Moments later, blasts of Indigo were sent into the broken submarine, quickly decaying the once strong vessel into nothing more then gray soot.

Tom and Bob stared at each other in disbelief, unable to process the events of the past couple minutes. Moments later, the shores of new Krakoa looked like that of Normandy on D-Day as the once empty landmass was now inhabited by multiple different looking creatures, most of which looked neither human nor Gungan. Many water creatures, making their first venture onto the newly risen island, walked towards Bob and Tom. Bob, who was naturally excited by the sudden rush of possible customers immediately greeted the visitors, asking them if they were hungry or possibly in need of shelter.

Poor Bob, such recklessness in him. No greater example of this was needed to be known outside of his idea of opening a diner on a vacant island. Before he was able to get a word out to the new visitors, he was gunned down by the man in the worn out hat. Tom, immediately threw his hands up in surrender; as he had no desire to have his life end due to his hasty post-retirement decision. Tom, now staring back at the strangers, was terrified, hoping against his darkest thoughts that he would somehow come out of this alive. With his hands still raised, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. Somebody very familiar, somebody he spent his the previous twenty five years laying down his life protecting.

Tom Bailey: Senator Binks, is that you?

Senator Binks: Yousa better believe it Mr. Bailey. Whata yousa doin out in the middle of Otah Gungah?

Tom Bailey: I’ve been asking myself the same question for the last five days Senator. Speaking of that, any chance you can get me out of this mess?

Senator Binks: Mr. Bailey, of course mesa gonna help yousa out. Laying down yousa life for me means a great deal to dis Senator.

Tom Bailey: Thanks a bunch Senator.

Senator Binks: Exsqueeze me Kyle, but can yousa help Mr. Bailey get to safety.

Kyle Raynor looked over at his fellow lantern core member and rolled his eyes. Though this act seemed utterly useless to him, he still formed a protective energy bubble around the former secret service agent and sent him up in the air, slowly moving him back to the mainland, which was many miles away. Tom thanked the Senator multiple times as he rose up in the air, looking down at the ground as he slowly moved back toward land.

Just as Tom was getting used to the energy construct, he saw swells of water crash onto the shores of New Krakoa, along with a flying streak of red heading right for the group of people. Just as quickly as the island rose out of the ground a month before, it came crashing back down into the sea, violently taking everybody with it. The combatants on the island were fighting back as well as they could, though in the end it was a futile effort.

From Tom’s point of view, the flying streak sent blasts of red energy down upon the island. The island then collapsed upon itself, making every effort to keep everyone on its surface. Both lantern members made attempts to fly away, only to be sent back down on to the deteriorating island, where the ever increasing waves made it impossible for anybody to stabilize themselves. In the end, the newly created landmass that was New Krakoa had disappeared and though there was an obvious fight still taking place under the sea, it was very apparent that it would never again rise above the water level.

Luckily for Tom, by the time his energy construct had broken apart, he was close enough to land to allow him to swim to safety. As Tom finally made it back to land, he lied down on the rocky beach and took a deep breathe. He then said a prayer for the brave Gungan for which he now owed his life. Ironic he thought, a life spent protecting a Senator only to have him save his life in the end. Tom walked back to the nearest town, realizing that reckless behavior was not befitting for a man of his experience.

Team Sleeping Pussy Vs. Real Man's Rabble Rousers

Team Sleeping Pussy: Dolphin, Aquagirl, Namor, Captain Nemo, The Sea Captain (watchmen), Aspen, Sharkticon#41-46, Moloch (Watchmen), Navy#9 Vehicle: Nautilus



Real Man's Rabble Rouser's: Aqualad (Jackson Hyde), Seaworms#2,3,6, PacMan, Ms. Pac Man and Baby Pac Man, Dragon#7-8, Snapdragon and Crunk, Stripe, Nazgul with fell beast, Rebel Trooper#1







In the deep waters just outside of Otah Gungah, Captain Nemo inside of the Nautilus with Aspen, The Sea Captain, Moloch and Navy#9. With nothing protecting him the rebel trooper he drowns. PacMan, Ms. PacMan and baby PacMan attack the Nautilus, only to be have baby Pacman be killed by a gang of Sharkticons. As Pacman and Ms. PacMan continued their assault on the Nautilus they are joined by sea worms. Pacman and Ms.Pacman entered the Nautilus and eaten Navy#9, The Sea Captain and Moloch. Aspen then made the water solid enough to kill Ms. PacMan. With the Nautilus sinking Captain Nemo escapes but is about to drown but Aquagirl has the dolphin swim Captain Nemo to the surface. As Captain Nemo is gathering air he is attacked by Nazgul with his fell beast. Snapdragon and Crunk come in and destroyed all the sharkticon with stripe attacking as well. Namor came in and quickly defeats Stripe. Dragons#7 and 8 come swimming only to have been eaten by sharks commanded by aqua girl. Snapdragon and Crunk then both stepped on an unaware Namor crushing him. Aqualad then summons all the sea creatures he can to attack Aspen but she creates a massive tidal wave strong enough to destroy Snapdragon and Crunk. In the debris Aquagirl sent the dolphin to attack Aqualad counterattack with a single punch and kills the dolphin. With Aquagirl carelessly swimming too close to the surface the Nazgul attacked and kills her. Aspen then sneaks behind Aqualad and controlled the blood flow within his body and rip it out o him. Nazgul tries to attack Aspen but his fell beast got too close to the water and she created a storm to kill the fell beast. With Nazgul falling into the water Aspen transorms the water into ice and impales Nazgul.

Season 9 Week 2: TEAM Vs. The Empire

TEAM is: Crime Syndicate of America Barracuda, Justice Legion Alpha Aquaman, Aqua-Mariner, Sin, Ulmo, Zilla, Sharkticon #49, and Cock Sneak Goombas #7, #8, and #10.

The Empire is: Lord Chaos, Master Order, Set, Throg, Stingray, Riptide, Harpoon, and Frog-man.

"In the waters outside of Otoh Gunga, the natural Order of things lead to this: The water controlling abilities of Ulmo and JLA Aquaman will make it impossible for Riptide, Harpoon, and Frog-man to survive. Fortunately, the violent tempest will also kill the Cock Sneak Goombas. This will leave only Set, Throg, and Stingray against the rest of TEAM. They will battle valiantly, but the odds are ultimately against them. Sin will kill Set after Set destroys CSA Barracuda and Aqua-Mariner. Zilla eliminates Throg after Throg dispatches Sharkticon #49. Finally, Stingray is no match for JLA Aquaman, and a trident through the abdomen seals The Empire's fate. This is how time will flow under my influence." states Master Order.

"And what of my influence? Who doesn't appreciate a little Chaos now and then?" asks Lord Chaos.

"I don't." replies Master Order.

"Quiet, you." demands Lord Chaos.

Barack and Miley's Commandos Vs. John and Vader's House of Sith Aids

The Commandos are: Iorek Byrnison, Lyra Belacqua, Pantalamion, Will Perry, Kirjava, Olivia Moore, Clairly Fray, Dora, Boots, Backpack, The Map, Katy Perry, Hannah Montana, Mikael, Estre, Freya, Finn, Elijah, Niklaus, Henrik, Rebekah, Kol, and Hope Mikaelson, Martian Manhunter, Faora, Human Bomb, Dark Phoenix, Zombie Nichol Valdez, and Ewok Child #9.

The Sith Aids are Poseidon, Killer Croc, Zombie Iceman, Zombie Abomination, Opee Sea Killer #9-10, and Sharkticon #15-17.



In the water's outside Otoh gungah, Iorek Byrnison, Lyra Bolacqua and Lyra Bolacqua's pet named pantalamion are drinking coffee in a underwater cafe. Iorek is talking about how his fur is the softest fur that any bear has ever had. Lyra is agreeing. Pantalamion is chasing her own face and eyeing Will Perry and more importantly his pet named Kirjava. Kirjava is giving Pantalamion a death glare for even looking it's way in the first place. Then all of the sudden everyone in all the cafe's down the street have customers dying because of something in their coffee, they were all poisoned by Killer croc. They died terrible, agonizing deaths, even the pets. Dora is lost when she see's all the people around her dying of the horrible coffee. Dora, Backpack, boots and the map are all hyperventilating over the fact that they witnessed murder. Dora and the others are having a hard time breathing and begging Sharkticons #15,16 and 17 to put them out of their misery. The sharticons come rushing over and Dora starts pulling on sharkticon #15's kneck, so his head comes off. The Other two Sharkticons put Dora and the rest of her gang out of there misery. The sharkticons walk away to get some coffee they have been hearing about that is to “die for.” Human bomb comes out off the coffee shop and catches his breath when he realizes he had drank poisonis coffeee, he then dies, both sharkticons are by his side dying of the dame mistake.Olivia Moore is on the surface because she cannot breathe underwater but after seeing her good friend Dora go under water and die she goes under the water to find out who did this horrible thing only to realize she can't breath underwater and dies instantly when tons of water enters her lungs suffocating her to death. Zombie iceman realizes his enemy, Olivia Moore has gone for a underwater swim and since he wants to beat Olivia at everything he goes under as well only to die the second he goes underwater by a opee sea killer that comes by and pokes him in the heart. Above water, Hannah Montana and Katy Perry are having a sing\swim off with one another. Katy Perry wins by default when opee sea killer #10 comes by and Hannah and the opee kill each other, Hannah with her pointy microphone and the opee with it's terrible dancing that made him trip and fall on top of Hannah. Poseidon comes rushing in after seeing the sing off. He is so dumbfounded that he starts spinning around in circles and stabs himself, Dark pheonix, the witch Freya, Niklaus, Finn, Elijah, Henrik and Rebekah the vampires He also kills the baby Hope and martian Man hunter with his giant trident in one large swing. Zombie Nichol valdez swims down into the water from the surface above to grab poseidon's disregarded trident. Nicole grabs the trident then swims up where she stabs herself down the throat when trying to eat the top of the trident. Then, Opee sea killer #9 comes by and eats the poisoned bodies from the cafe then dies of the poison like the bodies he digested, but right before Opee dies he swims over to Clary Fray and Faora and eats them whole, killing them with himself. Killer Croc then comes for his revenge on Katy Perry and Ewok Child #9, both of them had pulled a prank on Croc in 6th grade. It was about time for revenge. Killer Croc swims over to them both near the shore where they are having a meaningful conversation about whales and how the weather effects them. Croc swims over to give them both his special coffee that he had spent years perfecting, the blueish color is perfect. Croc hand them the drink and the both thank him for the drink that they desperately needing. Both the Ewok and Katy drink the wonderful blue coffee then die 3.25 seconds later. Croc is so happy he finally got his revenge for the mustache they drew on him while he fell asleep in Science class. Finally he has gotten his revenge! Then Ester the witch and Kol the half vampire, half witch comes walking by to see what the commotion is. All they had heard was a evil laugh coming from the distance. They both see Croc and dead bodies and are about to alert the water police but Croc see's them and knows that they know to much so he comes over and forces them to drink his remaining poisoned coffee. They both die 3.25 seconds later. Croc is so happy that he has won and gotten his revenge that he starts doing his happy dance, but Zombie Abomination does not like his happy dance so he comes over and bites Croc's head off. Abomination is so happy that he starts doing his own happy dance around the bodies floating next to him.

The Abomitrons Vs. Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies

The Abomitrons are: Snow Flame, Beast, Jazz, Springer, Dia Atlas, Percy Jackson, Panthro, Cheetara, Tygra, Dementor #11, Droideka #6, Navy SEAL #1 & 2.

Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies are The Lochness Monster, Zombie Godzilla, Bukaki Becks, Older Man Parks, Oldest Man Parks, Old Man Becks, Becks: Transgender Olympic Star, Jump-the- Shark-Lebron-James-Bitch-Becks, Opee Sea Killer #3-8, Navy SEAL Chief #10, Navy SEAL #31, and Olivia Munn (w/ a jet-pack).


The Abomitrons think fast and follow the orders of the brilliant Hank McCoy, even though they are falling through the sky and about to be dropped deep into the waters surrounding the underwater Nubian, Gungan run city of Otah Gungah. Beast and Snow Flame allow themselves to be grabbed out of the air by Jazz who transforms into his Porsche form to keep the two from drowning once the match begins, while Panthro, Cheetara, and Tygra allow the same of Springer who opts for his Cybertronian car form rather than the roomier helicopter format; knowing that the helicopter blades would never allow movement once subject to the strong Nubian current.

The Navy SEALs on both teams are supplied with full underwater gear.

Springer speaks to his inhabitants: “Now, I'm no expert on flesh based lifeforms; but I've seen enough internet videos to know that playing three cats in a water level seems like a pretty lousy move”.

“No argument from me, this is my worst nightmare come true. Here I thought being sprayed with a water bottle was torture”. Retorts the muscular Panthro from the driver seat of Springer.

The two car based Autobots start driving around in a circle towards the ocean floor kind of like they do on the Sharkticon planet in the movie (NO, not the Michael Bay movies, the REAL movie, with the Stan Bush soundtrack from the 80s). Dai Atlas, the ancient Autobot leader, being the only Transformer who can freely transform between forms without killing inhabitants, leads the attack on the already situated and seemingly water-superior Murderflies.

Though Percy Jackson could easily be deemed a water team all on his own. The young demigod travels swiftly through the water, while leading his team into battle. He blows by the group of Beckses and Parkses, and notices the already dead body of Olivia Munn, who died from the King of all Watchers: Joshatu the Magnificent when he accidentally broke the fourth wall and told her what everybody else in the universe already knew..... That she was never that hot and that she stopped being hot altogether about two years ago. Percy ignores this fact, like most young men do and telepathically takes control of the six Opee Sea Killers (with #6 & #7 being on the losing end of the fish cannibalism). The big goober fish begin infighting and allow him to pass right by on his way to the real threat of Zombie Godzilla. The miniature seeming Percy swims swiftly through the water towards his enormous foe, when he is thrown off course by a riptide causing burst of lightning breath from Zombzilla (just kickin it around, it's okay to admit you like it). Percy begins to regain his bearings when he is attacked once again. But it would not be Zombzilla who would be his undoing; but instead the Lochness Monster. The mysterious Nessie seems totally unaffected by Percy's empathic water creature abilities and is able to bite off the top torso of Jackson with little difficulty. Putting an end to the last, best hope of The Abomitrons.

Dai Atlas, with the loss of their young leader, bravely rushes towards the much larger and much grosser looking Zombzilla, knowing that he is the only one left on his team who could even potentially stand toe to toe with the enormous monster.

Becks: The transgender Olympic star, and Jump-the-shark-Lebron-James-Bitch Becks who I am assigning some water ability to, for this match simply because he has the word shark in his name watched enough Star Wars cartoons in their previous life of just being regular Becks to know exactly how to dismantle Droideka #6 while it spins around in the water attempting to regain its bearings. Not to mention, that there is something about the planet Naboo that makes droidekas much easier to destroy since they give Jedis a run for their money everywhere else on the galaxy; yet Jar Jar seems to make short work of them here on his home planet. But I digress........... The droideka floats away as spare parts while Transgender-Olympic-Star Becks and Jump-the-Shark-Lebron-James-Bitch Becks begin to vigorously suck face with one another underwater. I missed the next few things that happened in the match after being overtaken by an intense vomit attack.

The Lochness Monster was able to eat and absorb the ghost like Dementor by returning it back to the core processor of the simulation theory that makes both of these creatures visible to the human eye.

Old Man Parks, Older Man Parks, and Old Man Becks are eating some take out Bill Knapps and discussing their arthritis when they are hit by Jazz going about forty miles an hour (hey, that is really fast in the water).

Bukaki Becks manages to make a mess of Springer's windshield; but the infuriated Autobot quickly gets some revenge by running over the only creature here that makes Zombzilla seem: “not that gross”.

Transgender-Olympic-Star Becks and Jump-the-shark-Lebron-James-Bitch Becks are ambushed by Navy SEAL #1 & 2; but Navy SEAL Chief #10 and Navy SEAL #31 come to their Murdfly teammate rescue. Unfortunately, just as the fight starts to get good, Zombzilla in a brainless rage decides to eat everybody involved after he managed to bust Dai Atlas worse than every Sparty fans brackets.

With Dai Atlas and most of the riff raff of these two teams killed off; Beast gives the radio order for the two Abomitron-filled Autobots to roll out in a last ditch effort to win the match; but Jazz and Springer are quickly converged upon by Zombzilla, Nessie, and the remaining Opee Sea Killers..........

Consortium: Week 2

The Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets Vs. Griswold's Nut-busters

The Midgets are:

-Qwsp

-Namora

-Namorita

-Seaspray

-Sharkticon #33-38

-Ice Bros. #2-6

-Ice Suit Blue Toad

-Yellow Toad

-Magwai #1

-Zombie Robert Hudson


The Nut-busters are:

-Zombie #2

-Sharkticon #7

-Sharkticon #9

-Kanye West on an amphibious ATV

-Brood Alien #6

-Brood Alien #9

-Brood Alien #10

-Matrix Agent #1 (9 deaths)

-Matrix Agent #2 (9 deaths)

-Gotenks

-Black Tom Cassidy

-Imohtep


In an unanimous vote of 5 to 0.....