The Abomitrons are
Immell #10 (w/ a blue lightsaber): Jedi Fire , Immell #11 (w/ a red lightsaber): Raven Knight , Immell #14: Tammell , Immell #16: Death Hammer , Immell #18 (w/ a Zapper): Dr. Ray Wookie , Immell #19 Zombie Bullock
The Horsemen of Apokolips are
Dazzler KISS: Gene Simmons with a Red Lightsaber, Ace Frehley with the Heat Axe (from Shining Force), Paul Stanley with the Atlas Axe (from Shining Force), Peter Criss with the Halberd (from Shining Force)
The two teams are beamed into the danger room which is set to Tiger Stadium, Detroit, Mi 1996.
Kiss is on stage along with dazzler. And the Abomitrons end up back stage in the dressing room.
Jedi fire: So we cant go out there and attack them head on or the fans will rip us apart, and Dazzler is going to be super strong with all this music. So anybody got a plan?
Raven Knight: Jedi Fire, Tammell and Death Hammer you three set up behind the P.A system for an ambush. Dr. Ray Wookie you get there attention and lure them back here, it shouldn’t be that hard you smell like 10 Jamaicans slap boxing in a elevator. And you look like goat vomit.
Jedi Fire: Well he smells like goat vomit more then he looks it.
What The Fuuuuuuh, rip, spssshh, gurgal.
“everyone turns around with weapons drawn, to zombie bullock having consumed Tammell’s face and now working her way to the brains from the eye socket.”
Raven Knight: Come on Death Hammer you were supposed to be watching her! Dude now we don’t have them out numbered! Get her back on her leash!
Suddenly the room lights up with blinding beautiful light.
Dazzler: Quick start playing your music it will make me stronger.
Dazzler creates a defining dome of sound around the Immells they begin to bleed from every orifice and when I say every orifice I mean every last one. What would seem to be like one last desperate act Jedi fire launches a barrage of star bolts ,which in a stroke of dumb blind luck she manages to knock out the 32 bit holographic projector.
Danger room: system failure, Switching to default setting.
Dazzler moves in for the kill when suddenly the floor beneath her gives way and she falls into a blender like pit and is turned into mutant juice.
Raven knight : Its on now ladies.
Ace Frehley shoots a fireball from his guitar at Dr. Ray Wookie completely burning all hair from his body . While stunned by the 3rd degree burns covering him, Peter Criss lops off the front of Dr. Ray wookie’s face. As Ace and Peter high five, zombie bullock approaches from behind and takes a huge bite out of Ace Frehleys back, He turns to defend himself only to have the front of his neck violently torn out and the dirty hands of zombie Bullock reaching through the cavity of his neck in a attempt to gain access to his brains. Peter Criss acts fast and destroy the brains of both zombie Bullock and Ace frehley.
Gene Simmons: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Paul Stanly : its ok gene, ace is in a better place now.
Gene Simmons: I don’t care about that, the life insurance policy I had on him does not cover zombie attacks.
Peter Criss severed head falls to the ground blood spewing from where the head once was. Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley race to face raven knight who has silently teleported in behind Peter Criss. it’s a two on one melee. But raven knight is clearly the better swords man. He easily disarms Paul Stanley but Star child freezes raven knight in his tracks giving gene the opportunity to dismember him.
Paul Stanley: OH NO! They’ve killed him.
Gene Simmons: Don’t worry about it my insurance covers light sabers.
Jedi Fire approaches and engages the two in combat. With a hard round house kick to the face Paul Stanley is out cold. Enraged she turns her attention to Gene and starts to powerfully slash at Gene with the light saber. Simmons being weaken by doing a full two hour set in full make up and after suffering from the loss of such a great investment in ace Frehley’s life insurance. He falls to one knee.
Jedi Fire: how does it feel to know that I am about to violate you with every inch of this saber.
Gene replies with a burst of flames from his mouth. Jedi fire screams in agony as her face melts off, and with one quick snap the demon puts her out of her misery.
ABOMITRONS ALL DEAD.
The Horsemen of Apokolips are VICTORIOUS!
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Pre-Season: The Backyardigans vs The Untouchables
The Backyardigans are:
Dark Phoenix, and the formidable Rescue Rangers- Chip and Dale.
The Untouchables Are:
Woody the Sheriff
Buzz Lightyear
Tow Mater
The Burger King
The Care Cousins: Brave Heart Lion, Bright Heart Raccoon, Cozy Heart Penguin, Gentle Heart Lamb, Lotsa Heart Elephant, Loyal Heart Dog, Noble Heart Horse, Playful Heart Monkey, Proud Heart Cat, Swift Heart Rabbit and Treat Heart Pig.
"The Horror... The Horror!
Oh god... so much blood.. so much..."
The pool of blood at Woody's feet continued to spread. Far more blood than Woody felt should even be contained within the tiny bodies of his companions. Woody was covered in it, from his pull string to his clicking plastic boots...
"Woody, old friend... you're alive! I don't know how you managed to survive but you did! HA!!! HAHA! That's great!" said Buzz.
"Ok Woody, buddy, pal... come on, it'll do no one any good just standing here, lets go..." he continued.
"Ok Buzz... but promise me that we won't forget about them, they were so brave... they didn't even flinch.."
Buzz was confused at this moment, He assumed everyone had scattered when the Dark Phoenix arrived... in the heat of battle the Untouchables had managed to dismember the chipmunks with relative ease based on sheer numbers alone, Chip and Dale were now chunks... strewn across the danger room floor. Buzz had run off in an attempt to hijack the Danger Room controls to give them a fighting chance against whatever else the Backyardigans had brought to the fight and on his way he saw the phoenix descend on the group.
"What do you mean they didn't flinch? I heard their screams... I heard them begging for mercy... I heard Tow Mater crying asking "the great mechanic in the sky" for help..."
"Yes Buzz... but help wouldn't come... she pulled him apart and then she wouldn't let them move... while she made me do things... unspeakable things... to the Care Cousins.." Woody said quietly.
"You?! she made You do what?" Buzz stopped in his tracks..
Slowly woody turned towards Buzz, a small ball-peen hammer that had been blown off Tow Mater in his hand.. It may as well have been a giant mallet in his tiny cloth hands...
"heh... She made me do this" woody said in a voice not his own...
Buzz suddenly found himself unable to move... "Woody no.. common pal, I know you're in there... fight her!"
"Oh your little cowboy friend is fighting me Mr. Lightyear.." She said using Woody's voice twisted by her power "but it's not going to do any good. For I am the Dark Phoenix, arguably the most powerful telekinetic force you will ever encounter in your short little life..."
It was then that Woody Began his dark work, screaming for mercy inside his own brain, incapable of stopping the hammer as it rose and fell smashing his friend into shards of plastic and sparking electronics...
"Too infinity.. and beeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyuuuh..." the built in voicebox slowed to an inhuman drone as the last bit of life left the space mans eyes...
"Well then..." said Phoenix... "I'm sorry that I made you do that to your friend.. but do you have any idea how boring it would have been for me to just kill you one by one?"
"Oh no.. no... don't speak." she continued "there's really no point, we're through here... there's just one last loose end."
And with that she crushed the toy cowboy's head, and used Woody's string as a garrote to strangle the helpless burger king.
The Untouchables: All Dead.
Despite the loss of Chip and Dale The Backyardigans are victorious!
Friday, February 25, 2011
George Washington’s Slaves Vs Xavier’s Annihilation squad
George Washington’s Slaves are Starship trooper #1, Starship trooper#2 ,metroid #18
Xavier’s Annihilation squad is B.A. Baracus, Bonk, Ninja Gaiden, Rouge the Bat
The two team’s are beamed into the danger room. Starship trooper#1 and #2 both bolt for a tactical position as soon as there feet touch the ground, Metroid #18 slowly begins to follow them.
Mean while on the other side of the room, B.A. Baracus is woozy from the trip, he assumes its from the drugs.
B.A: Awww man wear the hell am I now, witch one of ya’ll drugged me. Was it you baby? Let me out a here baby, I ain’t got time for this jibber jabber!
Ninja Gaiden: He’s wifh me. Reave him arone, or I kell you!
Rouge the Bat: yea, he’s with me two.
Ninja gaiden: Shut it b#*%h!
EXCUSE ME CAN I HAVE EVERYONES ATTENTION UP HERE AT THE CONTROL ROOM..
Its Griffin Poteracki of Griffin’s high maintenance dope fiends and destroyers.
Hey guys how’s it going , I just wanted to talk to you all about something before we start the match. Now I know that I promised we would have color commentators for this match , and I know that I took up a collection from most of the players in the league to do so. But here’s the thing. I was surfing my way down town on the back of my head coach black lantern Al dog , and we were suddenly flagged down by a young black man, this young black man informed use that he had a plethora of moderately priced narcotics, and with one look at each other Al and I knew this was a sign from a higher power. So we spent all the money on crack and heroin. Sorry well get ya back next time. Now lets get this match going.
The Danger room suddenly springs to life with a swarm of robots and pit falls.
The 2 troopers are quickly surrounded, but easily mow down the advancing robots. It is not so easy however to locate their primary targets. Suddenly they spot something closing in.
Starship trooper # 2: What the F#*K is that!
Starship trooper #1: It’s some kind of flying brain bug. Shoot it!
Metroid # 18 is killed by friendly fire.
Starship trooper #1: Col. Jenkins would cry like a little b***h if he found out we blew the brains out of a brand new brain bug.
Starship trooper #2: I know he’s turned into such a fa***t
OUT OF NO WHERE
Rouge the Bat Swoops down with ninja gaiden on her back, the two charge at the troopers. Ninja gaiden deflects the bullets of the trooper with ease, He begins to run up the wall then leaps back to the floor, now back to the wall, now he’s right on top of Starship trooper #2, with one strike he cuts the trooper in half hotdog style. Starship trooper# 1 uses the fate of his friend to narrowly escape the ninjas clutches by hitching a ride on a passing missile. Ninja gaiden turns to see that his teammate was not as lucky as him, she took trooper#1’s full clip to the face.
Ninja gaiden regroups with what is left of his team, B.A is battling a robot and Bonk is lifeless on the floor. Ninja gaiden cuts the robots head off.
Ninja gaiden: wut happin to mi frend?
B.A: He just ran at the sucker, jumped up in da air and came down head first! Why would he do that, his heads already to big for his frail little body.
Ninja gaiden: It was good death.
While they were distracted a team of robot x-men have surrounded the two heroes. Starship Trooper #1 has taken up position atop a platform. Realizing he doesn’t have enough ammunition to kill his primary and new secondary targets, he decides to use his nuke.
Elsewhere in the building Professor Xavier Also realizes that starship trooper #1 is gana use his nuke. The professor races down the hallway plowing right over Shadowcat and Storm, he even knocks jubilee down the stairs possibly killing her. He finally reaches cerebro just before the trooper launches the nuke, and with its help he completely implodes his brain.
Shadowcat: Hey man what the hell was that all about?
Professor Xavier: Oh sorry, I rented out the Danger room to the FFL and one of those starship pricks was going to set of a nuke. Do you have any idea how many times I’ve had to rebuild this F*%KIN place. I don’t get any state funding for you little freaks, that s%*t comes out of my pocket.
George Washington’s Slaves : ALL DEAD
Xavier’s Annihilation squad: B.A. Baracus and Ninja Gaiden survive.
GEORGE WASHINGTON’S SLAVES WIN BY DQ
Xavier’s Annihilation squad is B.A. Baracus, Bonk, Ninja Gaiden, Rouge the Bat
The two team’s are beamed into the danger room. Starship trooper#1 and #2 both bolt for a tactical position as soon as there feet touch the ground, Metroid #18 slowly begins to follow them.
Mean while on the other side of the room, B.A. Baracus is woozy from the trip, he assumes its from the drugs.
B.A: Awww man wear the hell am I now, witch one of ya’ll drugged me. Was it you baby? Let me out a here baby, I ain’t got time for this jibber jabber!
Ninja Gaiden: He’s wifh me. Reave him arone, or I kell you!
Rouge the Bat: yea, he’s with me two.
Ninja gaiden: Shut it b#*%h!
EXCUSE ME CAN I HAVE EVERYONES ATTENTION UP HERE AT THE CONTROL ROOM..
Its Griffin Poteracki of Griffin’s high maintenance dope fiends and destroyers.
Hey guys how’s it going , I just wanted to talk to you all about something before we start the match. Now I know that I promised we would have color commentators for this match , and I know that I took up a collection from most of the players in the league to do so. But here’s the thing. I was surfing my way down town on the back of my head coach black lantern Al dog , and we were suddenly flagged down by a young black man, this young black man informed use that he had a plethora of moderately priced narcotics, and with one look at each other Al and I knew this was a sign from a higher power. So we spent all the money on crack and heroin. Sorry well get ya back next time. Now lets get this match going.
The Danger room suddenly springs to life with a swarm of robots and pit falls.
The 2 troopers are quickly surrounded, but easily mow down the advancing robots. It is not so easy however to locate their primary targets. Suddenly they spot something closing in.
Starship trooper # 2: What the F#*K is that!
Starship trooper #1: It’s some kind of flying brain bug. Shoot it!
Metroid # 18 is killed by friendly fire.
Starship trooper #1: Col. Jenkins would cry like a little b***h if he found out we blew the brains out of a brand new brain bug.
Starship trooper #2: I know he’s turned into such a fa***t
OUT OF NO WHERE
Rouge the Bat Swoops down with ninja gaiden on her back, the two charge at the troopers. Ninja gaiden deflects the bullets of the trooper with ease, He begins to run up the wall then leaps back to the floor, now back to the wall, now he’s right on top of Starship trooper #2, with one strike he cuts the trooper in half hotdog style. Starship trooper# 1 uses the fate of his friend to narrowly escape the ninjas clutches by hitching a ride on a passing missile. Ninja gaiden turns to see that his teammate was not as lucky as him, she took trooper#1’s full clip to the face.
Ninja gaiden regroups with what is left of his team, B.A is battling a robot and Bonk is lifeless on the floor. Ninja gaiden cuts the robots head off.
Ninja gaiden: wut happin to mi frend?
B.A: He just ran at the sucker, jumped up in da air and came down head first! Why would he do that, his heads already to big for his frail little body.
Ninja gaiden: It was good death.
While they were distracted a team of robot x-men have surrounded the two heroes. Starship Trooper #1 has taken up position atop a platform. Realizing he doesn’t have enough ammunition to kill his primary and new secondary targets, he decides to use his nuke.
Elsewhere in the building Professor Xavier Also realizes that starship trooper #1 is gana use his nuke. The professor races down the hallway plowing right over Shadowcat and Storm, he even knocks jubilee down the stairs possibly killing her. He finally reaches cerebro just before the trooper launches the nuke, and with its help he completely implodes his brain.
Shadowcat: Hey man what the hell was that all about?
Professor Xavier: Oh sorry, I rented out the Danger room to the FFL and one of those starship pricks was going to set of a nuke. Do you have any idea how many times I’ve had to rebuild this F*%KIN place. I don’t get any state funding for you little freaks, that s%*t comes out of my pocket.
George Washington’s Slaves : ALL DEAD
Xavier’s Annihilation squad: B.A. Baracus and Ninja Gaiden survive.
GEORGE WASHINGTON’S SLAVES WIN BY DQ
Pop-Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos
Former Pop-Superstar Hannah Montana & "Guess Who Brought Peace to Egypt Now" President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds Touring Battalion of Commandos is Batzarro, David Hasslehoff, Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Lady GaGa, Joan Jett, & Adam & Kate Hernandez.
The Syracuse Valley is (Movie) Megaton & Boomerang Bros. #2.
**Note from the watcher: If you aren’t going to read Boomerang Bros. #2’s dialogue with an over-exaggerated Australian accent than don’t even bother reading the match (Snoogans).
“G’day mate, I didn’t know I’d be battlin dese blokes with you out ere today. I mean chrikey, I got up, had some Brekkie and thought I was just gonna have me a run of the mill bog standard kinda day, I had no idea I’d be Binglin these buggers with one of the top players on the whole Valley. I figured since it’s Pre-Season an all I’d be Blueing with some bloody bludger who’d had a few to many Fosters at the boozer last night if you get what I’m sayin Mate”. Says Boomerang Bros #2 to his teammate Megatron. Megatron replies with: “Shut up flesh sack”. The Boomerang Bros. continues with: “Ahhh, not much for talkin while the match is goin I see. Well, I reckon I’ll follow your lead then mate, just know that me and me rang got your back when the Hoons show up. I must say Meggie, you don’t mind if I call ya Meggie do ya“... (No answer from Megatron). “You don’t even look the least bit scared, in fact ya look down right anxious. Me on the other hand, my clacker is as puckered as a joey’s freckle. By the by, how do ya reckon that we are walkin down the street of Boardwalk from Monopoly? I mean the blokes back at the base told me that we were gonna be nuttin out in a place called The Danger Room. Well I’ll be straight with you when I say that thimble over there doesn’t look mighty dangerous to me”.................. Uproarious laughter ensues from the mouth of Boomerang Bros. #2 and as much silence as is possibly made by an enormous creature made of Cybertronian Metal is made by Megatron. The Boomerang Bros. laughs a little bit more.
2 hours later.
Boomerang Bros #2 speaks: “Ha ha ha. Sorry to carry on like that Meggie, but that piece of piss tickled me old fella if ya know what I mean”. “I must say though Meggie, that even though this place doesn’t seem to dangerous, I can’t imagine that when The Commandos show up that that isn’t going to be to grouse. They’re the NL Champions, and I’m not sayin that we don’t have a fair go at em, but this could be rough”. Megatron speaks: “Just do what needs to be done when the time comes and shut up”. “Sorry Meggie, I’m not implyin that I’m gonna have a liquid laugh when the hoons, I mean Commandos show up, I’m just sayin that I reckon that they shant be a group of lollies when they do come around”. It is at this exact moment that The Commandos come running out of The Free Parking Section where they have been waiting all along and mount their “full-frontal attack“. The Commandos may have been quite decimated by last year’s play-off run, and this may not be their A-Team; but they are still proud NL Champions and have the utmost confidence as they rush the team that has up until this point still never made the play-offs. When this squad was first assembled, they instantly went in to talks about forming a band. Nietzsche was going to be the producer and song-writer, and was going to market the German crowds along with Hasslehoff, who was going to play rhythm guitar and sing (but only when they were in Germany). Lady GaGa was going to be the lead singer, with Joan on guitar and singing back-up. Adam and Kate, with their world-renowned skills of bass and drums from Atrium and The Used 2 Beez were of course backing up the power-driven sound that Joan was dreaming up. The band had great potential, for a couple of minutes, but Joan soon got sick of Friedrich’s whiny bulls**t and told him that she didn’t give a f%^k how deep his Existentialism was and that she could write music without his limpy, syphilis filled a&^”. At first Joan was cool with Lady GaGa being the lead singer, but after Lady GaGa instantly put on a leather jacket, died her hair & painted her fingernails jet black to steal Joan’s look, like she did to her old dead friend before she became a pop crap sensation who is “so original” Joan got pissed and kicked her out of the band. Adam and Kate stayed loyal to Joan, which led Kate to warn Lady GaGa that “if she didn’t like being kicked out of the band than she is really gonna hate being kicked in the box”. Joan Jett than saw Hoff play the guitar for 35 milla-seconds before she kicked him out of the band as well for being the worst musician of all time. Joan proclaimed that “I don’t care how much the Germans like that tool, I’d rather play with Adolf Hitler than have him back me up on guitar”. Adam added: “yeah, get out of out band you drunk fascist f#$k, and by the way: BAYWATCH SUCKED” Kate chimed in with “you suck poop dildos Hoff”. Joan Jett and her new 3 piece band (Known as Joan Jett and The Atrium Beez) then plugged in their instruments and broke into a kick-a** version of “I’m Gonna Run Away” in honor of their former Band mates. Batzarro clapped as loud as he could and exclaimed that he was their “smallest fan”. While this song is being played in the background The Valley and The Commandos finally become aware of each others presence and the battle begins. DAVID HASSLEHOFF ATTACKS!! And by attacks, I mean that he mistakes Megatron for the world’s largest toilet and tries to vomit on him. Megatron then steps on Hasslehoff with his hatred for organic beings growing ever-more. Joan breaks into a guitar solo and yells to Batzarro that he needs to make his move against the enemy. Batzarro sort of listens to the squad’s unofficial leader, but instead of attacking Megatron and his rang-wielding side-kick he goes into detective mode. After an hour or 2 of detective work he discovers that Friedrich Nietzsche is a philosopher. Megatron then vaporizes Batzarro with his lasers. Nietzsche begins to pen a manuscript about the perspectivism of each individual on the battlefield and how the impossibility of facts relates to each of their respective personalities in regards to their existential human existence and their individual emotional state. He writes the intro to his own book when Megatron walks over to the philologist and brings him right in front of his giant metal mouth. Megatron looks at Nietzsche and states that: “I have read your work flesh sack, and I assure you: God is not dead... You are looking at him”. Megatron then squeezes Nietzsche into mush. Lady GaGa begins to sneak up behind Megatron and gets her sinewy vocal cords ready to sing “Poker face” when Boomerang Bros. #2 jumps into action. The Boomerang Bros. recognizes the fact that he has regrettably annoyed the hell out of his teammate Megaton and that if the great Decepticon leader were at this exact moment to hear “Poker face” sung live by GaGa herself that it would be more than likely that he would be irritated to death. Boomerang Bros #2 throws his rang at GaGa’s head to deliver a fatal blow, which in essence saves the life of his mate Meggie. Megatron sees this act of quick-thinking and bravery by his teammate, but is unable to move quick enough to save him from being jacked in the back of the head by Joan Jett’s guitar. “I love myself for hating you” Joan says as the bloodied Boomerang Bros. falls to the ground with a head wound that is sure to prove mortal. “I’ve been bloody Larrikened by a Sheila”! The Boomerang Bros. exclaims! Joan wipes the blood from her guitar and jumps back on the makeshift stage back on the outskirts of Baltic and Mediterranean. Adam and Kate start jamming to “Riding with James Dean” as Joan belts out the lyrics but Megatron transforms into a Cybertronian Jet and pulls a strafing run which wipes out the rock trio with a “Back Lash” of “Bad Reputation”. Megatron then lands next to The Boomerang Bros. who ended up being a valiant addition to his team this day. “Will you live fleshling”? Megatron asks in his robotic amplified voice. The Boomerang Bros. responds with “I’d like to skite that she will be apples mate, but I’m afraid this show pony is Rubbish. Just tell me one thing though... (gurgle)... I saved you right? I mean, we’re mates (gurgle) ain’t we”? Megatron kneels next to the Boomerang Bros. who’s ears work for one more second to hear the great conqueror of Cybertron say: “Yeah, we’re mates”
THE SYRACUSE VALLEY IS VICTORIOUS!
The Syracuse Valley is (Movie) Megaton & Boomerang Bros. #2.
**Note from the watcher: If you aren’t going to read Boomerang Bros. #2’s dialogue with an over-exaggerated Australian accent than don’t even bother reading the match (Snoogans).
“G’day mate, I didn’t know I’d be battlin dese blokes with you out ere today. I mean chrikey, I got up, had some Brekkie and thought I was just gonna have me a run of the mill bog standard kinda day, I had no idea I’d be Binglin these buggers with one of the top players on the whole Valley. I figured since it’s Pre-Season an all I’d be Blueing with some bloody bludger who’d had a few to many Fosters at the boozer last night if you get what I’m sayin Mate”. Says Boomerang Bros #2 to his teammate Megatron. Megatron replies with: “Shut up flesh sack”. The Boomerang Bros. continues with: “Ahhh, not much for talkin while the match is goin I see. Well, I reckon I’ll follow your lead then mate, just know that me and me rang got your back when the Hoons show up. I must say Meggie, you don’t mind if I call ya Meggie do ya“... (No answer from Megatron). “You don’t even look the least bit scared, in fact ya look down right anxious. Me on the other hand, my clacker is as puckered as a joey’s freckle. By the by, how do ya reckon that we are walkin down the street of Boardwalk from Monopoly? I mean the blokes back at the base told me that we were gonna be nuttin out in a place called The Danger Room. Well I’ll be straight with you when I say that thimble over there doesn’t look mighty dangerous to me”.................. Uproarious laughter ensues from the mouth of Boomerang Bros. #2 and as much silence as is possibly made by an enormous creature made of Cybertronian Metal is made by Megatron. The Boomerang Bros. laughs a little bit more.
2 hours later.
Boomerang Bros #2 speaks: “Ha ha ha. Sorry to carry on like that Meggie, but that piece of piss tickled me old fella if ya know what I mean”. “I must say though Meggie, that even though this place doesn’t seem to dangerous, I can’t imagine that when The Commandos show up that that isn’t going to be to grouse. They’re the NL Champions, and I’m not sayin that we don’t have a fair go at em, but this could be rough”. Megatron speaks: “Just do what needs to be done when the time comes and shut up”. “Sorry Meggie, I’m not implyin that I’m gonna have a liquid laugh when the hoons, I mean Commandos show up, I’m just sayin that I reckon that they shant be a group of lollies when they do come around”. It is at this exact moment that The Commandos come running out of The Free Parking Section where they have been waiting all along and mount their “full-frontal attack“. The Commandos may have been quite decimated by last year’s play-off run, and this may not be their A-Team; but they are still proud NL Champions and have the utmost confidence as they rush the team that has up until this point still never made the play-offs. When this squad was first assembled, they instantly went in to talks about forming a band. Nietzsche was going to be the producer and song-writer, and was going to market the German crowds along with Hasslehoff, who was going to play rhythm guitar and sing (but only when they were in Germany). Lady GaGa was going to be the lead singer, with Joan on guitar and singing back-up. Adam and Kate, with their world-renowned skills of bass and drums from Atrium and The Used 2 Beez were of course backing up the power-driven sound that Joan was dreaming up. The band had great potential, for a couple of minutes, but Joan soon got sick of Friedrich’s whiny bulls**t and told him that she didn’t give a f%^k how deep his Existentialism was and that she could write music without his limpy, syphilis filled a&^”. At first Joan was cool with Lady GaGa being the lead singer, but after Lady GaGa instantly put on a leather jacket, died her hair & painted her fingernails jet black to steal Joan’s look, like she did to her old dead friend before she became a pop crap sensation who is “so original” Joan got pissed and kicked her out of the band. Adam and Kate stayed loyal to Joan, which led Kate to warn Lady GaGa that “if she didn’t like being kicked out of the band than she is really gonna hate being kicked in the box”. Joan Jett than saw Hoff play the guitar for 35 milla-seconds before she kicked him out of the band as well for being the worst musician of all time. Joan proclaimed that “I don’t care how much the Germans like that tool, I’d rather play with Adolf Hitler than have him back me up on guitar”. Adam added: “yeah, get out of out band you drunk fascist f#$k, and by the way: BAYWATCH SUCKED” Kate chimed in with “you suck poop dildos Hoff”. Joan Jett and her new 3 piece band (Known as Joan Jett and The Atrium Beez) then plugged in their instruments and broke into a kick-a** version of “I’m Gonna Run Away” in honor of their former Band mates. Batzarro clapped as loud as he could and exclaimed that he was their “smallest fan”. While this song is being played in the background The Valley and The Commandos finally become aware of each others presence and the battle begins. DAVID HASSLEHOFF ATTACKS!! And by attacks, I mean that he mistakes Megatron for the world’s largest toilet and tries to vomit on him. Megatron then steps on Hasslehoff with his hatred for organic beings growing ever-more. Joan breaks into a guitar solo and yells to Batzarro that he needs to make his move against the enemy. Batzarro sort of listens to the squad’s unofficial leader, but instead of attacking Megatron and his rang-wielding side-kick he goes into detective mode. After an hour or 2 of detective work he discovers that Friedrich Nietzsche is a philosopher. Megatron then vaporizes Batzarro with his lasers. Nietzsche begins to pen a manuscript about the perspectivism of each individual on the battlefield and how the impossibility of facts relates to each of their respective personalities in regards to their existential human existence and their individual emotional state. He writes the intro to his own book when Megatron walks over to the philologist and brings him right in front of his giant metal mouth. Megatron looks at Nietzsche and states that: “I have read your work flesh sack, and I assure you: God is not dead... You are looking at him”. Megatron then squeezes Nietzsche into mush. Lady GaGa begins to sneak up behind Megatron and gets her sinewy vocal cords ready to sing “Poker face” when Boomerang Bros. #2 jumps into action. The Boomerang Bros. recognizes the fact that he has regrettably annoyed the hell out of his teammate Megaton and that if the great Decepticon leader were at this exact moment to hear “Poker face” sung live by GaGa herself that it would be more than likely that he would be irritated to death. Boomerang Bros #2 throws his rang at GaGa’s head to deliver a fatal blow, which in essence saves the life of his mate Meggie. Megatron sees this act of quick-thinking and bravery by his teammate, but is unable to move quick enough to save him from being jacked in the back of the head by Joan Jett’s guitar. “I love myself for hating you” Joan says as the bloodied Boomerang Bros. falls to the ground with a head wound that is sure to prove mortal. “I’ve been bloody Larrikened by a Sheila”! The Boomerang Bros. exclaims! Joan wipes the blood from her guitar and jumps back on the makeshift stage back on the outskirts of Baltic and Mediterranean. Adam and Kate start jamming to “Riding with James Dean” as Joan belts out the lyrics but Megatron transforms into a Cybertronian Jet and pulls a strafing run which wipes out the rock trio with a “Back Lash” of “Bad Reputation”. Megatron then lands next to The Boomerang Bros. who ended up being a valiant addition to his team this day. “Will you live fleshling”? Megatron asks in his robotic amplified voice. The Boomerang Bros. responds with “I’d like to skite that she will be apples mate, but I’m afraid this show pony is Rubbish. Just tell me one thing though... (gurgle)... I saved you right? I mean, we’re mates (gurgle) ain’t we”? Megatron kneels next to the Boomerang Bros. who’s ears work for one more second to hear the great conqueror of Cybertron say: “Yeah, we’re mates”
THE SYRACUSE VALLEY IS VICTORIOUS!
Thursday, February 24, 2011
TEAM Vs. Team Sleeping Pussy
TEAM is Jedi Councilman #1, Roy "Mr. Awesome" Shildt, & Bruce Lee.
Team Sleeping Pussy is Cyclops & Kahn.
The Danger Room is set to look like Missile Command, which bodes well for Mr. Awesome and his squad; but before the match can truly start Roy gets "screwed" once again by the powers that be. Cyclops, after having been the leader of The X-Men for so many years, knows every code there is to know when it comes to The Danger Room. Cyclops easily changes the setting of The Danger Room to the most basic setting that Prof. X used to have him run when he was a young student at the school. It is a grassland setting that Cyclops knows so well that he could do it blindfolded and that greatly benefits his own long-range, non-melee powers. Kahn and Bruce Lee enter into a pitched battle that would make Becks poop himself as if he were in one of his own matches but it is cut short when Mr. Awesome uses his heightened brain power and superior sperm count to toss his ukulele directly into the head of Kahn. This gives Bruce Lee the upper hand for a moment, but the superior human being of Kahn is able to overcome the ukulele interruption and deliver a perfectly placed kill blow to the neck of Lee. Kahn is weary from his battle with Bruce Lee, which is why he is taken off guard by Shildt. Roy skewers Kahn through the heart with An American Flag Pole to kill the genetically enhanced tyrant. Mr. Awesome then pauses for a moment and picks up his cell phone to get Guinness and Playgirl on a conference call to ask for a ten page spread of himself, nude over Kahn’s dead body; but before he can work out the logistics he is fried by Cyclops’ optic blasts. Cyclops has seemingly popped out of nowhere as he is hiding behind trees and bushes before they even fully appear and then getting away before they dematerialize before the eyes of the rest of the people in the match, who unlike him do not have the simulated room committed to memory. The Jedi Councilman has been doing his best to get a jump on Cyclops; but despite his heightened Jedi senses and reflexes, Cyclops is still able to stay one step ahead. Cyclops parks himself behind a large rock for cover and begins shooting at The Jedi Master. The Jedi Councilman manages to dodge out of the way of the attacks, and then uses the force to pick up the enormous boulder and throw it out of the way, relieving Cyclops of his cover and exposing him to a full-frontal melee attack. Cyclops takes a few shots at the Jedi, but The Master easily blocks the optic blasts with his lightsaber. Both competitors stop and prepare to square off when Cyclops decides to aim and open up his visor to its full capacity against the Jedi. The distinguished member of the Jedi High Council decides not to attempt to evade the wide-ranging blast and to block it with his lightsaber. This mistake proved to be his last as the immense mutant power rips through both the lightsaber and force-barrier of the Jedi to completely melt him in place.
TEAM SLEEPING PUSSY IS VICTORIOUS!
Team Sleeping Pussy is Cyclops & Kahn.
The Danger Room is set to look like Missile Command, which bodes well for Mr. Awesome and his squad; but before the match can truly start Roy gets "screwed" once again by the powers that be. Cyclops, after having been the leader of The X-Men for so many years, knows every code there is to know when it comes to The Danger Room. Cyclops easily changes the setting of The Danger Room to the most basic setting that Prof. X used to have him run when he was a young student at the school. It is a grassland setting that Cyclops knows so well that he could do it blindfolded and that greatly benefits his own long-range, non-melee powers. Kahn and Bruce Lee enter into a pitched battle that would make Becks poop himself as if he were in one of his own matches but it is cut short when Mr. Awesome uses his heightened brain power and superior sperm count to toss his ukulele directly into the head of Kahn. This gives Bruce Lee the upper hand for a moment, but the superior human being of Kahn is able to overcome the ukulele interruption and deliver a perfectly placed kill blow to the neck of Lee. Kahn is weary from his battle with Bruce Lee, which is why he is taken off guard by Shildt. Roy skewers Kahn through the heart with An American Flag Pole to kill the genetically enhanced tyrant. Mr. Awesome then pauses for a moment and picks up his cell phone to get Guinness and Playgirl on a conference call to ask for a ten page spread of himself, nude over Kahn’s dead body; but before he can work out the logistics he is fried by Cyclops’ optic blasts. Cyclops has seemingly popped out of nowhere as he is hiding behind trees and bushes before they even fully appear and then getting away before they dematerialize before the eyes of the rest of the people in the match, who unlike him do not have the simulated room committed to memory. The Jedi Councilman has been doing his best to get a jump on Cyclops; but despite his heightened Jedi senses and reflexes, Cyclops is still able to stay one step ahead. Cyclops parks himself behind a large rock for cover and begins shooting at The Jedi Master. The Jedi Councilman manages to dodge out of the way of the attacks, and then uses the force to pick up the enormous boulder and throw it out of the way, relieving Cyclops of his cover and exposing him to a full-frontal melee attack. Cyclops takes a few shots at the Jedi, but The Master easily blocks the optic blasts with his lightsaber. Both competitors stop and prepare to square off when Cyclops decides to aim and open up his visor to its full capacity against the Jedi. The distinguished member of the Jedi High Council decides not to attempt to evade the wide-ranging blast and to block it with his lightsaber. This mistake proved to be his last as the immense mutant power rips through both the lightsaber and force-barrier of the Jedi to completely melt him in place.
TEAM SLEEPING PUSSY IS VICTORIOUS!
Preseason: Built Ford Tough vs Oblivio
Built Ford Tough is Indiana Jones w/Green Lantern Ring, Sirius Black
Oblivio is Chucky w/ Yellow Lantern Ring and Red Lightsaber, Tiffany (Bride of Chucky) w/ Star Sapphire Ring.
Danger Room is set to: "It's A Small World" ride
BFT enters the Danger Room and right away notices the odd choice of setting. "What is this? Some kind of joke?" questioned Indy "Why would someone stage a fight here?"
"Well, obviously this is some type of test of our focus.If you can actually keep your focus while having that obnoxious song constantly drilled into your head surrounded by those creepy looking children you should be able to handle just about anything thrown at you this season." replied Black. "Now hush, I sense a bit of dark magic in the area. Here's take this. It's a small magic powder that should protect you from curses."
"What's in it?"
"A few things mystic items, some snake venom, so-"
"SNAKES? I HATE SNAKES! KEEP THE SH** TO YOURSELF." Indy screams as the glow of his ring slightly flickers due to the fear that has entered his heart.
"Fine, muggle, fine. Keep your voice down. I'm going to investigate the area. I'll howl if I spot them" Sirius then changes into his dog form, gets into one of the ride's boat and leaves as Indy very shakily flies off into the heart of the ride looking for Oblivio.
Little does Dr Jones realize his outburst will have grave, GRAVE ramifications for him.
Meanwhile, the members of Oblivio huddle together and have their own quick team meeting.
"I tella ya what Tiff. I need to get the f%*k outta hear before I lose my g*d@&&& mind. THis f%**ing song is killing my. I need to kill someone. Now!" says Chucky.
"Quiet Chuck. If we can just stand still, maybe we can take our opponents by surprise and end this quick."
"Blend in?? Are you high doll?? We're both glowing like f**king Christmas trees in here!!!! I'm going to..." Chucky then hears Indy's earlier outburst and gets a sadistic smile across his face "Heh. don't like snakes, huh? That's good to know. Be right back, doll. I'm gonna go ease my nerves by getting me an easy kill."
"Ok honey, have fun."
Tiffany takes off in the other direction, ignoring the constant chorus of "It's a small world after all. It's a small. Small. World. It's a world of laughter.." when suddenly her ring alerts her to a loss of love in the area. She looks beneath her, and sees a boat go past but doesn't see that Sirius is laying underneath the bench in his dog form. He spots the glowing pink form of Tiffany and as he passes underneath her, he changes back into a man, pulls his wand and yells "STUPIFY" firing a bolt at Tiffany's back and sends her crashing into the water.
As Sirius jumps out of the boat to check on his fallen foe, let us check on what the intrepid Professor Jones is up to.
Indy has landed on one of the areas where the cherub faced children sing to tourists about a world of hope, and is looking around for any sign of opposition when he hears a faint fshOOM behind him. He turn around just in time to see Chucky leaping at him, trying to stab him with his lightsaber. Luckily for Indy, his mind works quickly enough to form a suit of green energy mid evil armor, saving him from getting stabbed. As Chucky lands in a heap, Indy remarks "Hey, you know what? That thing of yours looks..familiar. I think I dug something like that up once a long time ago but never knew what it did."
"It's a lightsaber, idiot. And I'm gonna use it to chop off your f**king HEAD" screams Chucky as he leaps to his feet and charges the adventuring archeologist.
"No. I don't think so." replies Indy and calmly has his ring create a green lightsaber to ward off Chucky.
Remember Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith? The part where Yoda and the Emperor have that lightsaber battle? Well, that's pretty much what happens here, but without all the Force throwing of senate seats. It's pretty cool.
Anyway, the skirmish eventually ends up with Indy kicking Chuck into the water, causing his lightsaber to flicker out for a second. Indy goes in after his, but is unable to find the murderous doll due to all the boats passing by. He then hears Sirius yells something out, and goes off to see what his team mate is up to.
"I gotta do something about that ring." thinks Chucky "Ah. I got it." and the evil Oblivio member flies off to find his victim.
Indy finds Sirius as he's searching through the murky water, trying to find the stunned Tiffany "What are you doing man?" says Indy "Just kill the damn thing and help me finish off the demonic midget I've got after me"
"I need to find the body so I can know exactly what form of dark magic we're dealing with." replies Black calmly "It should be stunned for a while, since it's not pure sorcerer magic but a sort of enchantment clumsily used by a muggle. Keep your head about you and give me time to investigate properly."
Suddenly, a gigantic yellow serpent explodes out of the water in front of them.
"SNAKE!!!!" screams Indy who leaps out of the water and fires a bolt of energy at the construct, too fearful to really use his ring properly.
"Indy, NO!" yells Black but it's too late. Dr Jones' hastily fired blast misses the snake, but hits a hanging power cord, sending it crashing into the water where it electrocutes both Tiffany and Sirius Black.
"Calling Dr Jones!!! Heh hahahaha HA!" cries out Chucky as he swoops out of the sky and is finally able to cut the head off of Indiana Jones as he scurries to get away from the yellow energy created snake.
"Well, that takes care of that." says Chucky "Too bad about Tiff, but I can finally get the f**k outta this obnoxious place. Sucks that that g*****n song is stuck in my head now." As Chucky exists the Danger Room, he begins to sadistically sing "It's a world of laughter, a world of tears.."
Built Ford Tough: All dead,
Oblivio: Chucky survives
OBLIVIO IS VICTORIOUS
Oblivio is Chucky w/ Yellow Lantern Ring and Red Lightsaber, Tiffany (Bride of Chucky) w/ Star Sapphire Ring.
Danger Room is set to: "It's A Small World" ride
BFT enters the Danger Room and right away notices the odd choice of setting. "What is this? Some kind of joke?" questioned Indy "Why would someone stage a fight here?"
"Well, obviously this is some type of test of our focus.If you can actually keep your focus while having that obnoxious song constantly drilled into your head surrounded by those creepy looking children you should be able to handle just about anything thrown at you this season." replied Black. "Now hush, I sense a bit of dark magic in the area. Here's take this. It's a small magic powder that should protect you from curses."
"What's in it?"
"A few things mystic items, some snake venom, so-"
"SNAKES? I HATE SNAKES! KEEP THE SH** TO YOURSELF." Indy screams as the glow of his ring slightly flickers due to the fear that has entered his heart.
"Fine, muggle, fine. Keep your voice down. I'm going to investigate the area. I'll howl if I spot them" Sirius then changes into his dog form, gets into one of the ride's boat and leaves as Indy very shakily flies off into the heart of the ride looking for Oblivio.
Little does Dr Jones realize his outburst will have grave, GRAVE ramifications for him.
Meanwhile, the members of Oblivio huddle together and have their own quick team meeting.
"I tella ya what Tiff. I need to get the f%*k outta hear before I lose my g*d@&&& mind. THis f%**ing song is killing my. I need to kill someone. Now!" says Chucky.
"Quiet Chuck. If we can just stand still, maybe we can take our opponents by surprise and end this quick."
"Blend in?? Are you high doll?? We're both glowing like f**king Christmas trees in here!!!! I'm going to..." Chucky then hears Indy's earlier outburst and gets a sadistic smile across his face "Heh. don't like snakes, huh? That's good to know. Be right back, doll. I'm gonna go ease my nerves by getting me an easy kill."
"Ok honey, have fun."
Tiffany takes off in the other direction, ignoring the constant chorus of "It's a small world after all. It's a small. Small. World. It's a world of laughter.." when suddenly her ring alerts her to a loss of love in the area. She looks beneath her, and sees a boat go past but doesn't see that Sirius is laying underneath the bench in his dog form. He spots the glowing pink form of Tiffany and as he passes underneath her, he changes back into a man, pulls his wand and yells "STUPIFY" firing a bolt at Tiffany's back and sends her crashing into the water.
As Sirius jumps out of the boat to check on his fallen foe, let us check on what the intrepid Professor Jones is up to.
Indy has landed on one of the areas where the cherub faced children sing to tourists about a world of hope, and is looking around for any sign of opposition when he hears a faint fshOOM behind him. He turn around just in time to see Chucky leaping at him, trying to stab him with his lightsaber. Luckily for Indy, his mind works quickly enough to form a suit of green energy mid evil armor, saving him from getting stabbed. As Chucky lands in a heap, Indy remarks "Hey, you know what? That thing of yours looks..familiar. I think I dug something like that up once a long time ago but never knew what it did."
"It's a lightsaber, idiot. And I'm gonna use it to chop off your f**king HEAD" screams Chucky as he leaps to his feet and charges the adventuring archeologist.
"No. I don't think so." replies Indy and calmly has his ring create a green lightsaber to ward off Chucky.
Remember Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith? The part where Yoda and the Emperor have that lightsaber battle? Well, that's pretty much what happens here, but without all the Force throwing of senate seats. It's pretty cool.
Anyway, the skirmish eventually ends up with Indy kicking Chuck into the water, causing his lightsaber to flicker out for a second. Indy goes in after his, but is unable to find the murderous doll due to all the boats passing by. He then hears Sirius yells something out, and goes off to see what his team mate is up to.
"I gotta do something about that ring." thinks Chucky "Ah. I got it." and the evil Oblivio member flies off to find his victim.
Indy finds Sirius as he's searching through the murky water, trying to find the stunned Tiffany "What are you doing man?" says Indy "Just kill the damn thing and help me finish off the demonic midget I've got after me"
"I need to find the body so I can know exactly what form of dark magic we're dealing with." replies Black calmly "It should be stunned for a while, since it's not pure sorcerer magic but a sort of enchantment clumsily used by a muggle. Keep your head about you and give me time to investigate properly."
Suddenly, a gigantic yellow serpent explodes out of the water in front of them.
"SNAKE!!!!" screams Indy who leaps out of the water and fires a bolt of energy at the construct, too fearful to really use his ring properly.
"Indy, NO!" yells Black but it's too late. Dr Jones' hastily fired blast misses the snake, but hits a hanging power cord, sending it crashing into the water where it electrocutes both Tiffany and Sirius Black.
"Calling Dr Jones!!! Heh hahahaha HA!" cries out Chucky as he swoops out of the sky and is finally able to cut the head off of Indiana Jones as he scurries to get away from the yellow energy created snake.
"Well, that takes care of that." says Chucky "Too bad about Tiff, but I can finally get the f**k outta this obnoxious place. Sucks that that g*****n song is stuck in my head now." As Chucky exists the Danger Room, he begins to sadistically sing "It's a world of laughter, a world of tears.."
Built Ford Tough: All dead,
Oblivio: Chucky survives
OBLIVIO IS VICTORIOUS
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
The Tijuana Taco Benders vs. Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies
“In a world gone mad, we will not spank the monkey, but the monkey will spank us.”
-Jay
I look upon the teams which will do battle in this Pre-Season Match located in the Danger Room. They are as follows:
The Tijuana Taco Benders- Deadpool Corps: Lady Deadpool, Headpool, Dogpool and Kidpool.
Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies- Etrigan the Demon and Jay and Silent Bob with Suzanne.
The Danger Room spews forth a number of projectiles and obstacles for the teams to contend with while they also attempt to focus on their enemies.
Headpool rolls over to Jay and Silent Bob.
Jay: What the hell is this piece of $h%t? A f@&kin’ head? A f@&kin’ head?
Silent Bob shrugs his shoulders.
Jay: You know Bob, I was the f@&kin’ kickball champion in fourth grade! Let’s see what I can do with this!
Headpool: Listen you stoned piece of garbage. . .
Headpool is not allowed to finish his statement before Bob rips him from the ground and rolls him across the floor. Jay kicks the bodiless-head and it flies across the room. Suzanne cheers as Headpool is impaled on a stake jutting from the floor. The stake keeps the head in place as he screams at the trio.
Headpool: You think this stake is going to keep me from you?!?! No way! I’m coming to get you all. . . once I get off this stake that is!
Headpool rotates his head around and slowly begins to rise up the stake. As Headpool is about to fall off, a large object smashes into the jutting pole and crushes the head.
Jay: One for Jay and Silent Bob! (looks at Suzanne) Oh. . . and for you too!
Dogpool rushes at the three.
Jay: Oh Sh%t! That dog is wearing a costume! Just like those little f@&kin’ Beverly Hills Chihuahuas!
Dogpool leaps at Suzanne and rips her throat out. Suzanne attempts to say something, but only bloody gurgling is heard. Dogpool then focuses on Jay, who accidentally trips and falls to the ground. As Dogpool is about to land on Jay, a spear, shot from the wall, hits Dogpool and pins the fierce beast to the wall located across the room. Dogpool’s guts dribble to the floor below.
Jay (gets up): You know what Bob!?!?
Bob motions the number two on his finger.
Jay: That’s right motherf@&cker! Two for Jay and Silent Bob!!!
Kidpool jumps over to the two burnouts. He wields his lightsabers back and forth in a frenzied display.
Jay: Oh $h%t! That kid’s got mad skills!
Kidpool rushes at Jay and is picked up by Etrigan before he reaches the long-haired stoner.
Etrigan:
Little Boy Red,
Go wield your sabers;
Nothing to me,
I’m doing Jay and Bob a favor.
Going to rip you apart,
Going to make you cry;
Not long on this Earth,
Because now you’re going to die!
Etrigan crushes Kidpool’s arms and the youth drops the sabers. Etrigan then rips the young boy’s head off and chucks it on top of another pole, which juts from the ground.
Jay: Damn! You’re so. . . demonized!
Etrigan wanders off, looking for his next prey.
Lady Deadpool comes upon Jay and Silent Bob.
Jay: Me likee your costume! You’re so sweet, I’m thinking that you’re worthy of me (obscene motions follow) beating my meat!
Lady Deadpool does not allow his pornographic moves to continue. She uses her swords to slice Jay in three pieces. She then focuses on Silent Bob- who is no longer silent.
Silent Bob: You know, just because my friend objectified you in the way he did, does not mean that my fate should be the same as his. Remember, I may be a dude that cannot fly on an airplane due to absolutely discriminatory practices, but that does not mean that I am any less of a person.
Lady Deadpool: You are to me.
Silent Bob meets the same fate as his friend, only he is cut in two, not in three, like Jay.
Etrigan walks up behind Lady Deadpool.
Etrigan:
A beauty you are,
To any man’s eye;
But I am a demon,
Who wishes to see you fry.
Etrigan projects flames of mystical hellfire which fries Lady Deadpool.
Etrigan:
I am the final Murderfly,
For I truly represent;
But now I am tired,
I’m just so spent.
Etrigan walks through the opening of the Danger Room to the outside world.
The Tijuana Taco Benders- All Dead.
Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies- Etrigan the Demon survives.
BROCK SAMPSON’S FIGHTING MURDERFLIES IS VICTORIOUS!!!
-Jay
I look upon the teams which will do battle in this Pre-Season Match located in the Danger Room. They are as follows:
The Tijuana Taco Benders- Deadpool Corps: Lady Deadpool, Headpool, Dogpool and Kidpool.
Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies- Etrigan the Demon and Jay and Silent Bob with Suzanne.
The Danger Room spews forth a number of projectiles and obstacles for the teams to contend with while they also attempt to focus on their enemies.
Headpool rolls over to Jay and Silent Bob.
Jay: What the hell is this piece of $h%t? A f@&kin’ head? A f@&kin’ head?
Silent Bob shrugs his shoulders.
Jay: You know Bob, I was the f@&kin’ kickball champion in fourth grade! Let’s see what I can do with this!
Headpool: Listen you stoned piece of garbage. . .
Headpool is not allowed to finish his statement before Bob rips him from the ground and rolls him across the floor. Jay kicks the bodiless-head and it flies across the room. Suzanne cheers as Headpool is impaled on a stake jutting from the floor. The stake keeps the head in place as he screams at the trio.
Headpool: You think this stake is going to keep me from you?!?! No way! I’m coming to get you all. . . once I get off this stake that is!
Headpool rotates his head around and slowly begins to rise up the stake. As Headpool is about to fall off, a large object smashes into the jutting pole and crushes the head.
Jay: One for Jay and Silent Bob! (looks at Suzanne) Oh. . . and for you too!
Dogpool rushes at the three.
Jay: Oh Sh%t! That dog is wearing a costume! Just like those little f@&kin’ Beverly Hills Chihuahuas!
Dogpool leaps at Suzanne and rips her throat out. Suzanne attempts to say something, but only bloody gurgling is heard. Dogpool then focuses on Jay, who accidentally trips and falls to the ground. As Dogpool is about to land on Jay, a spear, shot from the wall, hits Dogpool and pins the fierce beast to the wall located across the room. Dogpool’s guts dribble to the floor below.
Jay (gets up): You know what Bob!?!?
Bob motions the number two on his finger.
Jay: That’s right motherf@&cker! Two for Jay and Silent Bob!!!
Kidpool jumps over to the two burnouts. He wields his lightsabers back and forth in a frenzied display.
Jay: Oh $h%t! That kid’s got mad skills!
Kidpool rushes at Jay and is picked up by Etrigan before he reaches the long-haired stoner.
Etrigan:
Little Boy Red,
Go wield your sabers;
Nothing to me,
I’m doing Jay and Bob a favor.
Going to rip you apart,
Going to make you cry;
Not long on this Earth,
Because now you’re going to die!
Etrigan crushes Kidpool’s arms and the youth drops the sabers. Etrigan then rips the young boy’s head off and chucks it on top of another pole, which juts from the ground.
Jay: Damn! You’re so. . . demonized!
Etrigan wanders off, looking for his next prey.
Lady Deadpool comes upon Jay and Silent Bob.
Jay: Me likee your costume! You’re so sweet, I’m thinking that you’re worthy of me (obscene motions follow) beating my meat!
Lady Deadpool does not allow his pornographic moves to continue. She uses her swords to slice Jay in three pieces. She then focuses on Silent Bob- who is no longer silent.
Silent Bob: You know, just because my friend objectified you in the way he did, does not mean that my fate should be the same as his. Remember, I may be a dude that cannot fly on an airplane due to absolutely discriminatory practices, but that does not mean that I am any less of a person.
Lady Deadpool: You are to me.
Silent Bob meets the same fate as his friend, only he is cut in two, not in three, like Jay.
Etrigan walks up behind Lady Deadpool.
Etrigan:
A beauty you are,
To any man’s eye;
But I am a demon,
Who wishes to see you fry.
Etrigan projects flames of mystical hellfire which fries Lady Deadpool.
Etrigan:
I am the final Murderfly,
For I truly represent;
But now I am tired,
I’m just so spent.
Etrigan walks through the opening of the Danger Room to the outside world.
The Tijuana Taco Benders- All Dead.
Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies- Etrigan the Demon survives.
BROCK SAMPSON’S FIGHTING MURDERFLIES IS VICTORIOUS!!!
Le'Napoleon Brigade vs. The Right Wing
“Nice genes. You got the chromosomes in all the right places.”
-Osmosis Jones
I look upon the teams which will do battle in this Pre-Season Match located in the Danger Room. They are as follows:
Le’Napoleon Brigade: Hynn, Steve Wiebe, Andrew Laidlaw and Phil Day.
The Right Wing: (Black Lantern) She-Hulk and Osmosis Jones.
Steve Wiebe, Andrew Laidlaw and Phil Day are huddled together in the middle of the Danger Room. The three gaming champions strategize on how to conquer their current plight. The three figure that since they have demolished the evils faced in a video game, they will be more than a match for any form of danger confronted in reality.
Wiebe: Nothing to be afraid of guys! It’s just like jumping over the barrels to get to the monkey!
The three break away from one another and focus on the task at hand.
A panel in the floor opens and flaming, wooden barrels burst forth. Wiebe sees the barrels rolling toward him and smiles. Like his avatar Mario, Wiebe begins to jump over the oncoming hurdles. The last barrel rolls past his feet. Wiebe lands with the utmost grace.
Wiebe: I AM THE KING OF KONG!
As Wiebe screams his moniker, Osmosis Jones jumps into the gamer’s mouth. Although a leukocyte, Jones has turned to “evil” ways because of BL She-Hulk’s presence. Jones quickly travels down Wiebe’s gullet and into his nether regions.
Jones: You may be the King of Kong, but now I’m the King of your Dong!
Jones uses his lymphatic abilities and causes Wiebe to urinate himself. Wiebe’s pants blotch and a stream of urine dribbles down his leg into a pool beneath his feet. Wiebe begins to pout, but his embarrassment is short lived as a black energy construct (in the form of a large mallet) crushes him.
BL She Hulk: How ironic!
BL She-Hulk then uses her ring’s powers to pick up Andrew Laidlaw and throw him across the room. Laidlaw crashes into the ceiling and falls to the top of a pillar which juts from the room’s ground. The pillar begins to rise toward the ceiling. Laidlaw is sure to be crushed. As he is about to be smashed, he looks at his Galaga brother-in-arms, Phil Day. Day knows what he must do. Day climbs up the mini towers leading to the top pillar and jumps to Laidlaw. Laidlaw finally shrugs off the brunt of the previous BL blow and looks at Day. They smile and wrap themselves in each other’s arms. Their hold looks oddly familiar.
Day: Just like the double-ship move in Galaga.
The two jump from tower to tower down from their initial location and land safely on the ground. As they smile longingly at one another, a black energy tendril rushes at them. It is blocked by a blue-energy construct projected by Hynn.
Hynn: Let me handle this!
In fearful day, in raging night,
With strong hearts full, our souls ignite,
When all seems lost in the War of Light,
Look to the stars—
BL She-Hulk does not allow Hynn to finish his mantra-“For hope burns bright!” The power of the black lantern ring, as well as the strength of She-Hulk is too much for Hynn. Hynn is ripped apart.
On the ground, Osmosis Jones, who has been relieved from Wiebe’s body, enters into Day.
Day hears a cackling echo in his brain. It is Jones.
Jones: -m skt n. . . m skt mn. . . I’m skt man. . . I’M THE SKAT MAN!
Jones rips through Day’s digestive system and Day begins to soil himself. Day’s diarrhea refuses to stop. Day becomes instantly weakened as his body becomes dehydrated from the loss of so much fluid in so short a time. Laidlaw attempts to assist his teammate, but his face contorts at the nauseating smell. Laidlaw then begins to vomit.
Jones is dispelled from Day and looks at the sight of Day soiling himself and Laidlaw vomiting over himself.
Jones: This is just. . . so wrong. . . but it feels. . . so right! Take it away BL!
BL swoops in. The two weakened Brigade members look up to see a smile creep upon BL She-Hulk’s face.
BL She-Hulk: Goodbye gentlemen.
BL She-Hulk rips out the hearts of both Day and Laidlaw, who die in their own vomit and feces, but alas, in each other’s arms.
Le’Napoleon Brigade: All dead.
The Right Wing- (Black Lantern) She-Hulk and Osmosis Jones live.
THE RIGHT WING IS VICTORIOUS!!!
-Osmosis Jones
I look upon the teams which will do battle in this Pre-Season Match located in the Danger Room. They are as follows:
Le’Napoleon Brigade: Hynn, Steve Wiebe, Andrew Laidlaw and Phil Day.
The Right Wing: (Black Lantern) She-Hulk and Osmosis Jones.
Steve Wiebe, Andrew Laidlaw and Phil Day are huddled together in the middle of the Danger Room. The three gaming champions strategize on how to conquer their current plight. The three figure that since they have demolished the evils faced in a video game, they will be more than a match for any form of danger confronted in reality.
Wiebe: Nothing to be afraid of guys! It’s just like jumping over the barrels to get to the monkey!
The three break away from one another and focus on the task at hand.
A panel in the floor opens and flaming, wooden barrels burst forth. Wiebe sees the barrels rolling toward him and smiles. Like his avatar Mario, Wiebe begins to jump over the oncoming hurdles. The last barrel rolls past his feet. Wiebe lands with the utmost grace.
Wiebe: I AM THE KING OF KONG!
As Wiebe screams his moniker, Osmosis Jones jumps into the gamer’s mouth. Although a leukocyte, Jones has turned to “evil” ways because of BL She-Hulk’s presence. Jones quickly travels down Wiebe’s gullet and into his nether regions.
Jones: You may be the King of Kong, but now I’m the King of your Dong!
Jones uses his lymphatic abilities and causes Wiebe to urinate himself. Wiebe’s pants blotch and a stream of urine dribbles down his leg into a pool beneath his feet. Wiebe begins to pout, but his embarrassment is short lived as a black energy construct (in the form of a large mallet) crushes him.
BL She Hulk: How ironic!
BL She-Hulk then uses her ring’s powers to pick up Andrew Laidlaw and throw him across the room. Laidlaw crashes into the ceiling and falls to the top of a pillar which juts from the room’s ground. The pillar begins to rise toward the ceiling. Laidlaw is sure to be crushed. As he is about to be smashed, he looks at his Galaga brother-in-arms, Phil Day. Day knows what he must do. Day climbs up the mini towers leading to the top pillar and jumps to Laidlaw. Laidlaw finally shrugs off the brunt of the previous BL blow and looks at Day. They smile and wrap themselves in each other’s arms. Their hold looks oddly familiar.
Day: Just like the double-ship move in Galaga.
The two jump from tower to tower down from their initial location and land safely on the ground. As they smile longingly at one another, a black energy tendril rushes at them. It is blocked by a blue-energy construct projected by Hynn.
Hynn: Let me handle this!
In fearful day, in raging night,
With strong hearts full, our souls ignite,
When all seems lost in the War of Light,
Look to the stars—
BL She-Hulk does not allow Hynn to finish his mantra-“For hope burns bright!” The power of the black lantern ring, as well as the strength of She-Hulk is too much for Hynn. Hynn is ripped apart.
On the ground, Osmosis Jones, who has been relieved from Wiebe’s body, enters into Day.
Day hears a cackling echo in his brain. It is Jones.
Jones: -m skt n. . . m skt mn. . . I’m skt man. . . I’M THE SKAT MAN!
Jones rips through Day’s digestive system and Day begins to soil himself. Day’s diarrhea refuses to stop. Day becomes instantly weakened as his body becomes dehydrated from the loss of so much fluid in so short a time. Laidlaw attempts to assist his teammate, but his face contorts at the nauseating smell. Laidlaw then begins to vomit.
Jones is dispelled from Day and looks at the sight of Day soiling himself and Laidlaw vomiting over himself.
Jones: This is just. . . so wrong. . . but it feels. . . so right! Take it away BL!
BL swoops in. The two weakened Brigade members look up to see a smile creep upon BL She-Hulk’s face.
BL She-Hulk: Goodbye gentlemen.
BL She-Hulk rips out the hearts of both Day and Laidlaw, who die in their own vomit and feces, but alas, in each other’s arms.
Le’Napoleon Brigade: All dead.
The Right Wing- (Black Lantern) She-Hulk and Osmosis Jones live.
THE RIGHT WING IS VICTORIOUS!!!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
PreSeason: Alice's Wonder Team vs Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve
Alice's Wonder Team is:
Afterlife Alice Abernathy, Goblins #6-8
Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve is:
Green Lantern #1, Samurai #15
The Danger Room is set to: Feudal Japan.
Goblins 6 and 8 trail behind Alice Abernathy and Goblin #7 as they all travel the countryside, searching for the members of the Kennelz.
Goblin 6: Hey, is it me or are all odd numbered Goblins suck ups? Look at mr "high and mighty" up there kissing up to miss Afterlife there. Thinks she's all great since she's got a proper name. Makes me sick.
Goblin 8: Dude, chill out. It's no big deal. Get on point.
G6: Yeah, yeah. I know. Just kinda bugs me, seeing such blatant apple polishing. I don't see what the big deal is. She's not even wearing what she wore in the movie. Where's the blue dress and the white rabbit?
G8: Wait, what? I don't think that's her. That's the Alice who went to Wonderland. I think she's the singer who sings "Feed my Frankenstien" and "I'm 18"
G6: That makes no sense. Why send a singer into battle? That's stupid. That'd be like sending those humans who wrote that song about me to fight.
G8: There's a song about you?
G6: Duh. Yeah. Far East Movement. You know. "Sippin sizzurp in my ride, like Three 6
Now I’m feelin so fly like a G6 Like a G6, Like a G6 Now I’m feelin so fly " Dude, they wrote that about me.
G8: Flerg off. You're full of...
Suddenly, both goblins fall to the ground holding their heads as a voices screams inside their skulls
Alice: IDIOTS. Shut. Up and get serious. This isn't a game. Pay attention to what's going on.
G 6-8: Sorry.
G8: Way to go, merzelspitz. Now the maid from the Brady Bunch is all upset and thinks we're lame.
G6: Ok, first off. Why would a maid go fight? Think about it. Second. You guys are all just haterz who don't have songs about you and are trying to bring me down, which is really sad. Third. I think these Alice cracks are played out now, time to represent. I'm on point. I'm deadly. I wish those Lurve kidz would show up. I'd be all like "Yo. What's up? You wanna go? Don't start what you can't fini..."
"WONDER TEAM!!!" Samurai 15's voice booms out "We ask you this only once. Surrender to us and avoid the inevitable bloodshed that is to follow"
G6: Oh. HELL. NO. You done lost your mind fool. We got you outnumbered 2 to 1, plus I'm ready to throw down now that you done scuffed my pumas.
G8: Pumas? You're not wearing shoes.
G6: It's an expression. Deal with it later, holmes. It's on now. I'm bout to carve up this fooooool and feast upon the marrow in his bones.
G8: I've still never heard that Puma expression before.
Both Goblins continue to argue as up ahead, Goblin 7 shows that not all Goblins are ridiculous morons that can be used for silly dialogue and begins to battle Samurai 15 as Alice stands back to watch.
Goblin 7 is promptly killed.
Samurai 15 stands over G7's corpse and begins to wipe the blood off his sword when suddenly his mind starts reeling. "You have killed an inferior. You may as well have slaughtered a defenseless child. You have no honor."
"What have I done?" thinks the noble Japanese Warrior? "My blade is stained forever stained with a needless kill. My honor is tainted." "Yes" repeats the voice "You know what you must do."
"Hai" says the proud warrior as he turns his blade upon himself and commits suicide, not realizing that he has committed no sin, but has fallen victim to the telepathy of Afterlife Alice.
Alice: Well, that's half the team. Now for the other half.
Alice begins to telepathically search for Green Lantern #1, the lone survivor of the Kennelz.
"Got you Lurver boy." smirks Alice as she attempts to invade the noble emerald warriors mind as she did his fallen comrade. What Alice didn't anticipate the will power and mental focus it takes to wield the mighty green light of Oan technology and the lantern shakes off her mental attempt.
"My turn" says the lone Vicker and wills himself into a giant robobattle construct which he uses to vaporize Alice as she charges him.
Meanwhile, Goblins 6 and 8 have witnessed this entire exchange from the safety of behind some trees, both taking cover as soon as they hear the crackle of green energy and smelt the familiar ozone scent of willpower being weaponized.
"Oh man. We're so flerged. Like, totally flerged. That waitress from the tv was our only shot. Game over man, game over." cried Goblin numer 8, showing that the ALice cracks are not entirely "played out".
Goblin 6 straightens up. Gets a gleam in his eye, and deftly proclaims "Homie, it ain't over. It's just bout to get boutie boutie, and rowdy rowdy. Check this." The cocky, ghetto Goblin saunters into the open and yells "Yo! Kermit the flashlight!How bout you come on down here and try throwing hands mano e mano with a thug straight outta Moordoor?" The Goblin smirks as he sees the Lantern lands in front of him, his robobattlesuit dissipating as he approaches. The crafty Goblin begins to pull a small dagger out from behind his back, smirking, as he approaches his foe.
"Yo. You 'bout to see how we do it in my hood. Playa. Yeah, Jolly Green. I'm gonna turn you red in a second." he claims as while lunging forward to stab the lantern in the eye.
Almost instantly, a glowing green wall appears between the point of the knife and the mighty Green Lantern, causing the Goblin to break his knife and his face.
As the Goblin lay in a pool of his own blood, the willpowered warrior steps over him and nonchalantly drops a big green safe on him. Killing that jive talking sucka.
"Is there any left to challenge me??!!! " booms the mighty voice of the Lantern. His answer comes in the form of a very distinct smell. The lantern recognizes the odor of Goblin urine, and sees a small stream of it heading uphill being left behind by the surprisingly fast Goblin #7 who is desperately trying to save his own skin.
"Too easy" sighs the Lanterns as a sniper rife begins to form in his hand "Later you, scudder. Seems a shame cause I was amused by you and your buddy's banter".
The Lantern pulls the trigger and the term "he who lives to run away, lives to fight another day" is shown to be false as the Goblins head disappears in flash of bright green light.
Alice's Wonder Team: All dead.
Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve: Green Lantern #1 survives.
Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve are victorious!!!
Afterlife Alice Abernathy, Goblins #6-8
Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve is:
Green Lantern #1, Samurai #15
The Danger Room is set to: Feudal Japan.
Goblins 6 and 8 trail behind Alice Abernathy and Goblin #7 as they all travel the countryside, searching for the members of the Kennelz.
Goblin 6: Hey, is it me or are all odd numbered Goblins suck ups? Look at mr "high and mighty" up there kissing up to miss Afterlife there. Thinks she's all great since she's got a proper name. Makes me sick.
Goblin 8: Dude, chill out. It's no big deal. Get on point.
G6: Yeah, yeah. I know. Just kinda bugs me, seeing such blatant apple polishing. I don't see what the big deal is. She's not even wearing what she wore in the movie. Where's the blue dress and the white rabbit?
G8: Wait, what? I don't think that's her. That's the Alice who went to Wonderland. I think she's the singer who sings "Feed my Frankenstien" and "I'm 18"
G6: That makes no sense. Why send a singer into battle? That's stupid. That'd be like sending those humans who wrote that song about me to fight.
G8: There's a song about you?
G6: Duh. Yeah. Far East Movement. You know. "Sippin sizzurp in my ride, like Three 6
Now I’m feelin so fly like a G6 Like a G6, Like a G6 Now I’m feelin so fly " Dude, they wrote that about me.
G8: Flerg off. You're full of...
Suddenly, both goblins fall to the ground holding their heads as a voices screams inside their skulls
Alice: IDIOTS. Shut. Up and get serious. This isn't a game. Pay attention to what's going on.
G 6-8: Sorry.
G8: Way to go, merzelspitz. Now the maid from the Brady Bunch is all upset and thinks we're lame.
G6: Ok, first off. Why would a maid go fight? Think about it. Second. You guys are all just haterz who don't have songs about you and are trying to bring me down, which is really sad. Third. I think these Alice cracks are played out now, time to represent. I'm on point. I'm deadly. I wish those Lurve kidz would show up. I'd be all like "Yo. What's up? You wanna go? Don't start what you can't fini..."
"WONDER TEAM!!!" Samurai 15's voice booms out "We ask you this only once. Surrender to us and avoid the inevitable bloodshed that is to follow"
G6: Oh. HELL. NO. You done lost your mind fool. We got you outnumbered 2 to 1, plus I'm ready to throw down now that you done scuffed my pumas.
G8: Pumas? You're not wearing shoes.
G6: It's an expression. Deal with it later, holmes. It's on now. I'm bout to carve up this fooooool and feast upon the marrow in his bones.
G8: I've still never heard that Puma expression before.
Both Goblins continue to argue as up ahead, Goblin 7 shows that not all Goblins are ridiculous morons that can be used for silly dialogue and begins to battle Samurai 15 as Alice stands back to watch.
Goblin 7 is promptly killed.
Samurai 15 stands over G7's corpse and begins to wipe the blood off his sword when suddenly his mind starts reeling. "You have killed an inferior. You may as well have slaughtered a defenseless child. You have no honor."
"What have I done?" thinks the noble Japanese Warrior? "My blade is stained forever stained with a needless kill. My honor is tainted." "Yes" repeats the voice "You know what you must do."
"Hai" says the proud warrior as he turns his blade upon himself and commits suicide, not realizing that he has committed no sin, but has fallen victim to the telepathy of Afterlife Alice.
Alice: Well, that's half the team. Now for the other half.
Alice begins to telepathically search for Green Lantern #1, the lone survivor of the Kennelz.
"Got you Lurver boy." smirks Alice as she attempts to invade the noble emerald warriors mind as she did his fallen comrade. What Alice didn't anticipate the will power and mental focus it takes to wield the mighty green light of Oan technology and the lantern shakes off her mental attempt.
"My turn" says the lone Vicker and wills himself into a giant robobattle construct which he uses to vaporize Alice as she charges him.
Meanwhile, Goblins 6 and 8 have witnessed this entire exchange from the safety of behind some trees, both taking cover as soon as they hear the crackle of green energy and smelt the familiar ozone scent of willpower being weaponized.
"Oh man. We're so flerged. Like, totally flerged. That waitress from the tv was our only shot. Game over man, game over." cried Goblin numer 8, showing that the ALice cracks are not entirely "played out".
Goblin 6 straightens up. Gets a gleam in his eye, and deftly proclaims "Homie, it ain't over. It's just bout to get boutie boutie, and rowdy rowdy. Check this." The cocky, ghetto Goblin saunters into the open and yells "Yo! Kermit the flashlight!How bout you come on down here and try throwing hands mano e mano with a thug straight outta Moordoor?" The Goblin smirks as he sees the Lantern lands in front of him, his robobattlesuit dissipating as he approaches. The crafty Goblin begins to pull a small dagger out from behind his back, smirking, as he approaches his foe.
"Yo. You 'bout to see how we do it in my hood. Playa. Yeah, Jolly Green. I'm gonna turn you red in a second." he claims as while lunging forward to stab the lantern in the eye.
Almost instantly, a glowing green wall appears between the point of the knife and the mighty Green Lantern, causing the Goblin to break his knife and his face.
As the Goblin lay in a pool of his own blood, the willpowered warrior steps over him and nonchalantly drops a big green safe on him. Killing that jive talking sucka.
"Is there any left to challenge me??!!! " booms the mighty voice of the Lantern. His answer comes in the form of a very distinct smell. The lantern recognizes the odor of Goblin urine, and sees a small stream of it heading uphill being left behind by the surprisingly fast Goblin #7 who is desperately trying to save his own skin.
"Too easy" sighs the Lanterns as a sniper rife begins to form in his hand "Later you, scudder. Seems a shame cause I was amused by you and your buddy's banter".
The Lantern pulls the trigger and the term "he who lives to run away, lives to fight another day" is shown to be false as the Goblins head disappears in flash of bright green light.
Alice's Wonder Team: All dead.
Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve: Green Lantern #1 survives.
Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve are victorious!!!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Watcher Email Addresses
Please send your teams this year directly to the watcher writing your match. There will be a link to this post over on the right in the Helpful Links section. Also, the Links section has been updated with a link to the Season 4 schedule. Use this throughout the year to check the terrain and point values for each given week and quit bugging your commish. Good luck to all... except Ed.
-Fizz
----------------------------------
Josh - joshhouslander [at] gmail [dot] com
Ryan - ryanpoteracki [at] gmail [dot] com
Bryan - bandtbeckerman [at] wideopenwest [dot] com
Chris S. - tragichero182 [at] yahoo [dot] com
Griffin - griffin.poteracki [at] gmail [dot] com
Nick - nickhouslander [at] yahoo [dot] com
-Fizz
----------------------------------
Josh - joshhouslander [at] gmail [dot] com
Ryan - ryanpoteracki [at] gmail [dot] com
Bryan - bandtbeckerman [at] wideopenwest [dot] com
Chris S. - tragichero182 [at] yahoo [dot] com
Griffin - griffin.poteracki [at] gmail [dot] com
Nick - nickhouslander [at] yahoo [dot] com
Sunday, February 20, 2011
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