Wonder Twins Powers... Activate!!

The GM's of The Right Wing and Built Ford Tough would like to announce the arrival of their two healthy baby twins. Lucas (Luke for short) was born at 5 lbs and 1 oz, and Anna (Anna for short) came in a 4 lbs 14 oz. And for all those wondering, Lucas was born a mere 30 seconds before his sister Anna. Everyone is doing great and currently resting up. We here at Fantasy Fantasy League would like to congratulate the proud parents and are extremely excited on meeting the new members of TEAM. Congratulations Shan and Jared.

George Washington's Slaves vs. Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies

“Dreams will get you nowhere, a good kick in the pants will take you a long way.”
-Baltasar Gracian

I look at the teams to do battle at the Playoff Planet during this Week 6 Match. They are as follows:

George Washington's Slaves: Wedge Antilles and R2-G1 in an X-Wing, Dack and R2-G2 in an X-Wing, Matt Tracker in Thunderhawk, Frank Martin in the Golden Fox, Agen Kolar, Ajax Major, Amazo, Ancient Ginaz Swordsmen #7-12, The Gears of War crew: Sgt. Marcus Fenix, Dominic Santiago, Augustus "Cole Train" Cole and Damon Baird, Ben Skywalker, Bender "Bending" Rodriguez, Box, Navy Seals #21 and 22, Bronze Dragon #20, Cade Skywalker, Cassandra Nova, Cthulu, Colossus, Connor McLeod, Santa Claus (w/ Ki Adi Mundi's old lightsaber), Korben Dallas (w/ green lightsaber), Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, and Rudolph, Cosmos, Crash Bandicoot, Dare the Terminator, Darkman, Darth Plagueis, Dormammu, Duncan Idaho Ghola #7, Frankenstein's Monster, Ginaz Swordsmen #1-6, Hound, Huckleberry Hound, Inspector Gadget, Jason Bourne, Jedi Masters #10-17, Juan Sanchez Villa Lobos Ramirez, Zombie Ki Adi Mundi, King Kong, Kybuck, Loki, Mad Eye Moody, Mercer, Taurus and Red Dog, Red Dragon #10, Sandworms #15 and 16, Saruman, Sauron, Sayid Jarrah (w/ red lightsaber), Scorpion (w/ red lightsaber and heat axe), Sifo Dyas, SpongeBob Squarepants, Stinkor, Super Soldier, Taki, Tony the Tiger, Ultraman, Windcharger, William Wallace, Doppleganger, Runner, B'dg, Zillius Zox, Coleman Kcaj, Gizmo, Air Bud, Paul Bunyan and Babe the Ox and Piecemeal.

Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies: Sandworm #1, The Maxx and Julie Winters, Doc Brown, Speedy Gonzalez, Dobby, Forge, Agent X, Hellboy, Etrigan the Demon, Lobo, Guy Gardner, G'Nort, Brock Sampson, Kyle Rayner, Beatrix Kiddo, Dorf (w/ a heat axe), Jedi Master #20, Hawkman and Hawkwoman, The Planeteers: Kwame, Wheeler, Linka, Gi, Ma-Ti and Suchi the Monkey, The Power Rangers: Jason, Billy, Zach, Trini and Kimberly, Mecha Godzilla, Rancors #1 and 2, The Power Puff Girls: Blossom and Bubbles, The Technobots: Scattershot, Lightspeed, Nosecone, Strafe and Afterburner, Ron Popeil, Shazam, Starro, Grimlock, King (Head Coach) Leonidas, The Wu-Tang Clan: ODB, Dirt Mcgirt, Big Baby Jesus, RZA, GZA, Method Man, Raekwon, Ghost Face Killah, Inspectah Deck, U-god, Masta-Killa and Cappadonna, Topher Brink, Dolls #1 and 2, The Great Lakes Avengers: Mr. Immortal, Squirrel Girl, Big Bertha and Flatman, Squirrels #1-15, The Blair Witch, Vincent (from Collateral), Teddy Roosevelt, Quickdraw McGraw, Moon Knight, Booster Gold, Captain Caveman and Marines #3-100

Let the Battle Begin. . . .

Water Region

Ron Popeil stands confidently on an immense barge. Marines #3-100 stand behind him. Popeil pulls out his Mr. Microphone and shouts to the Slaves team which waits on a flotilla one hundred yards away.

Popeil: Slaves!!! I am going to use my Inside the Shell Egg Scrambler to destroy SpongeBob Squarepants!!! I am going to use my Cap Snaffler to pop the head off of Gizmo!!! I’m going to use my Electric Food Dehydrator on Bronze Dragon #20!!! I’m going to use my GLH-9 Hair in a Spray to blind Cthulu!!! I’m going to use my Six Star Cutlery set to disembowel Navy Seals #21 and 22!!! And my friends behind me are going to help make that happen!!! Marines!!!!

The barge reaches the platform and the battle begins. Popeil focuses on Squarepants. The huckster grabs the diminutive sea dweller. Popeil pulls out his modified Scrambler (which uses batteries instead of electricity) from his backpack and pushes SpongeBob in the invention. SpongeBob Squarepants is de-liquefied and explodes. Popeil then focuses on Gizmo. Gizmo reacts and attempts to jump into the water. Marine #72 reaches Gizmo before he can do so. Marine #72 hands Gizmo to Popeil who removes the Cap Snaffler from his backpack. He uses the Snaffler to pop the head off of Gizmo. Navy Seals #21 and 22 begin to fire their weapons and kill Marines #14-17 and 24-27. Popeil reacts to the death of his teammates and throws the knives from his Six Star Cutlery set at the Seals. Navy Seal #21 is hit in the chest and dies. Navy Seal #22 is wounded. Popeil pounces on the military man and jams his Solid Flavor Injector into Navy Seal #22’s eye; his brain is flooded and shuts off.

The remaining Marines fire upon Bronze Dragon #20. Bronze Dragon #20 is riddled with bullets and dies, but not before it uses its repulsion gas and lightning breath to kill Marines #43-45 and 67-75.

Cthulu emerges from the watery depths. Cthulu kills a majority of the Marines, but is also killed in the process. The only survivors of the water melee are Ron Popeil and Marines #3, 5, 6 and 8-13. Popeil looks to the carnage around him.

Popeil: We have won this battle my friends, but at what price. . . at what price. . . I actually figure that it cost us only 10 easy installments of $14.99. . .

Space Region

The two X-Wings come into formation and fire upon the Murderflies’ Green Lanterns-Guy Gardner, G’Nort and Kyle Rayner. Their combined ring powers deflect the lasers shot by the Rebel fighters. Rayner and Gardner work together to create a massive green projection which envelops the X-Wings and smashes them together. Wedge Antilles manages to avoid a majority of the collision’s impact. Dack and R2-G2 are not as lucky as their X-Wing explodes, killing them both. Although not destroyed, Wedge’s X-Wing is crippled and spins out of control. The spaceship is caught by G’Nort’s ring powers. G’Nort destroys the X-Wing and R2-G1; Antilles manages to eject out. Cosmos sees Antilles floating in space in a pressurized-suit. Both Antilles and Cosmos fly away from the skirmish. G’Nort follows the Transformer and Rebel leader. G’Nort is met by both B’dg and Zillius Zox. G’Nort actually gains the upper hand on the squirrel-like B’dg and kills him. In response to his teammate’s death, the Red Lantern kills G’Nort. The big headed lantern is then met by the duo of Gardner and Rayner. The two green lanterns kill Zox. Rayner then flies at Cosmos and Antilles. Rayner rips Antilles from Cosmos’ back and crushes him alive with his ring powers. Cosmos sees his rider being killed and strikes back at Rayner. Rayner is destroyed by Cosmos. Gardner is engulfed by the fury of his red lantern background and rips Cosmos apart. The Runner rushes to the scene and uses the power cosmic. Gardner implodes.

Desert Region

Speedy Gonzalez stands with King Leonidas.

Gonzalez: ¡Hola enemigos! ¡Está a punto de morirse una muerte horrible en las manos de un ratón rápido y sus camaradas honorables!

In response to Gonzalez’s words, Zombie Ki Adi Mundi rides the Kybuck toward his enemies. Before he reaches the Murderflies, his zombie urges get the better of him and he rips the throat out of the steed. Mundi is thrown off the Kybuck as it falls, mortally wounded. Zombie Ki Adi Mundi quickly rises and ignites his lightsaber. He is joined by Coleman Kcaj and Sayid Jarrah with a red lightsaber. The lightsaber wielding teammates are met by Jedi Master #20 and Dorf with a heat axe. Mundi and Kcaj focus on Jedi Master #20 and combine their efforts to kill him. Agent X is somewhat hidden amongst the sand and uses his enhanced marksmanship skills to blow a hole in Mundi’s head; the zombie goes down. Dorf avoids the lightsaber of Sayid numerous times due to his height. Dorf’s axe grazes Jarrah’s leg; an injured Sayid falls, but not before slicing the head off of Dorf on the way down. Beatrix Kiddo jumps on the Sayid (who has lost his lightsaber) and shoves her kitana through his chest. Sayid dies. Kiddo is then surrounded by Ginaz Swordsmen #1-6. Kiddo slices and dices her way through all Ginaz #1-6. She is then met by Ancient Ginaz Swordsmen #7-12. She is tired due to her previous efforts. Although she manages to kill Ancient Ginaz Swordman #8, she is skewered repeatedly by the remaining Ancient Ginaz members. Rancors #1 and 2 storm upon the scene and rip apart the remaining Ancient Ginaz Swordmen #7, 9-12. While the Rancors are devouring their victims, Sandworm #16 explodes from the sands below and engulfs both Rancors #1 and 2.

Ajax Major attempts to squash Gonzalez, but is unsuccessful due to the swift nature of the speedy rodent. King Leonidas decides to take advantage of Ajax Major’s distraction. The two men decide to Greco-Roman wrestle to the death. Leonidas is victorious and suffocates Ajax with a double-scissor, leg, death-grip. Leonidas’ victory is short lived as Sandworm #15 engulfs him. Seeing his master and team captain die, Gonzalez whips into a frenzy. He jumps on Grimlock and steers the Transformer to attack Sandworm #15. Grimlock rips Sandworm #15 apart. Sandworm #1 barrels to the scene and the two Sandworms (#1 and #16) finish each other off.

Agent X locates Duncan Idaho Ghola #7 and takes him out. Agent X is then killed when Coleman Kcaj sneaks behind him and burns a hole through Agent X’s heart. Grimlock and Gonzalez then storm up at Kcaj and rip him apart. Hound attempts to attack the “Two G Killaz” (aka Gonzalez and Grimlock), but loses its fight.

Gonzalez, still on top of Grimlock, shouts: ¡El Murderflies Luchador es victorioso en nuestra batalla de desierto! ¡Chúpelo Esclaviza!

City Region

Jason Bourne faces Vincent. Although Vincent is a trained killer, Bourne is a natural assassin. The two fight at a staccato pace, but eventually Bourne bests Vincent. Moon Knight focuses on Bourne, and being a former mercenary and killer, uses his crescent shaped weapons to rip into Bourne. Bourne falls down and is confronted by the entire Wu-Tang Clan. The Clan kicks him repeatedly while he is on the ground. Bourne looks up at the Clan, hearing their “Protect Ya Neck” rap.

ODB: So what's up man?Dirt McGirt: Cooling manBig Baby Jesus: Chilling chilling?RZA: Yo you know I had to call, you know why right?GZA: Why?Method Man: Because, yo, I never ever call and ask, you to play something right?Raekwon: YeahGhost Face Killah: You know what I wanna hear right?Inspectah Deck: What you wanna hear?U-god: I wanna hear that Wu-Tang jointMasta Killa: Wu-Tang again?Cappadonna: Ah yeah, again and again!

As the last words are sung out of the mouth of Cappadonna, they come together and deal Bourne his death blow. Air Bud runs up to the Clan and barks. The Clan surrounds the dog. The diversion worked. Although Air Bud is killed, he sacrificed himself so that Ben Skywalker, Sifo Dyas and Cade Skywalker could dispel with the Clan. The Jedi slice and dice through them all; the entire Wu-Tang Clan dies in a bloody heap.

Darkman sees Topher Brink. Maniacal laughter is heard as he brutally kills the Dollhouse programmer. Dolls 1 and 2 take revenge and kill Darkman. They then focus on Juan Sanchez Villa Lobos Ramirez and Taki. Although both are killed, Doll #1 loses her life in the process. Doll #2 is then killed by Box and Piecemeal. Etrigan the Demon sneaks behind Mad Eye Moody and kills him before Moody can use his wizardry.

Moon Knight faces both Scorpion with a red lightsaber and heat axe and Bender. Bender bends his robotic body around Moon Knight, who is now imprisoned in the robot’s steel arms and legs. Moon Knight is then killed by Scorpion. Etrigan the Demon lunges at Scorpion and rips him apart. In response, the combined efforts of both Cassandra Nova and Colossus kill Etrigan.

The Technobots: Scattershot, Lightspeed, Nosecone, Strafe and Afterburner approach the scene in their various forms. Each Transformer focuses on an individual Slave. Scattershot rips through Bender. Strafe rips through Box. Afterburner smashes Ben Skywalker. Lightspeed barrels into Sifo Dyas. The robots then decide to form Computron. Computron immediately uses its immensely powerful form to kill Cade Skywalker, Dare the Terminator and Windcharger. Computron sees Piecemeal come to the scene and fires at the mutant. Piecemeal absorbs the immense energy frequency and blasts it back at Computron. Although Piecemeal is killed in the process due to the immense energy expended, he manages to rip apart Computron and destroy Afterburner and Nosecone. The remaining Transformers fire upon and kill Cassandra Nova. Colossus races to a manhole cover and runs through the tunnels to the next battle sight

Underground City (Sewer) Region

Hellboy (to Frankenstein’s Monster): You are one ugly mother!

Although the two tussle, Hellboy uses his obnoxiously large weapon to blast a hole through the monster’s body; Frankenstein crumples to the wet floor. Hellboy then focuses on the Gears of War crew. As he is about to fire upon them, he is ripped apart by the razor sharp webs of Doppleganger. Doppleganger laughs at his defeat of Hellboy and looks at Julie Winters. He kills her. The beast is then struck by both Maxx and Lobo. The two destroy Doppleganger.

Suchi the Monkey throws its feces across the armored faceplates of the Gears of War crew. The Planeteers take advantage of Suchi’s poop. Linka uses her wind powers to pin the crew to the sewers. Gi uses her water powers to spray the dirt and germ infested waters at the Gears of War crew, blinding them further. Ma-Ti uses his powers to talk to the rats which swarm over the Gears of War Commandos. The Gears of War crew fire at the Planeteers, but are unable to hit anybody in the confusion. The Maxx and Lobo take advantage of the Planeteers skills and kill the entire Gears of War clan.

Snow Region

Santa Claus rides in his sleigh. His voice can be heard from the sky.

Claus: Ho! Ho! Ho! Murderflies’ blood gonna flow!

With that said, Claus rides down on his sleigh, Ki Adi Mundi’s old lightsaber in hand. He kills Stinkor first without being sprayed and focuses on Dobby. Claus becomes infuriated that the house-elf is not working at his shop even though all the other elves of the world currently are, building his toys. He lops Dobby’s head off. As the sleigh rises again, Brock Sampson grabs onto Rudolph and breaks the reindeer’s neck. He then jumps on the reindeer’s braces and steers the sleigh into the icy tundra below. In the crash, Dasher, Vixen and Comet are killed. The Power Rangers swarm the reindeer and with their fighting prowess, kill the remaining reindeer-Dancer, Prancer, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen. Brock looks for Santa, but he is missing amongst the wreckage. Forge uses his abilities to quickly create weapons out of the sleigh parts. He, along with Sampson, use these weapons against Korben Dallas. Dallas is able to block some of the blows, but eventually succumbs to their effort and dies.

Forge and Sampson then look for Claus. The two locate and fire their weapons at the Jolly Gentile. Inspector Gadget uses his body as a shield and deflects the weapons fired at Claus; this move saves Claus. Super Soldier then leaps over Gadget. In mid air, Super Solider uses his shield to slice off Forge’s head. He then barrels into Brock Sampson. After a pitched battle, Super Solider is victorious.

Agen Kolar and Jedi Masters #10-17 race at the Power Rangers. All of the Rangers are slaughtered, but Jedi Masters #10 and 13 die too. Inspector Gadget transforms into a hovercraft and flies to another part of the planet with his remaining tundra teammates.

Plains Region

Quickdraw McGraw: What do you say Huckleberry?

Huckleberry Hound: Who me?

Before Huckleberry Hound can react, a shot is heard and a bullet hole shows up in the middle of his forehead. Huckleberry Hound drops dead. Quickdraw McGraw is joined by Doc Brown. They have William Wallace in their sights.

Wallace: Ye may kihl mah, but weill ‘ave ohr victorah!

Wallace is riddled with bullets and drops to his death. Tony the Tiger rushes at Doc Brown and mauls him to death. McLeod is shot by McGraw. Conner McLeod falls to the ground, but rises again. McGraw is amazed and attempts to reload his gun. McLeod, still in a bit of pain due to the bullet, staggers over to McGraw and slices his head off.

Teddy Roosevelt senses McLeod’s weakness and slices his head off with his army sword. Roosevelt looks down at McLeod’s decapitated body.

Roosevelt: Absence and death are the same - only that in death there is no suffering. [A real Roosevelt quote].

Taurus, Red Dog and Mercer fire upon Roosevelt. Roosevelt is killed. In response to the ex-President’s death, Loki wipes out Sgt. Slaughter’s Renegades-Taurus, Red Dog and Mercer. Mecha Godzilla comes to the site and rips both Tony the Tiger and Crash Bandicoot apart. Amazo uses the metahuman powers he siphoned off his teammates and fries Mecha Godzilla. The robotic beast falls to the ground.

In the Air

Captain Caveman is startled that a “dinosaur” can fly. While he attempts to understand this discrepancy, Red Dragon #10 blows its fire and burns Captain Caveman alive. The Caveman’s body falls to the ground, dead. Before the Dragon can take another life, Hawkman and Hawkwoman skewer the beast and clubs it over its head. Red Dragon #10 dies. Matt Tracker in Thunderhawk comes upon the Hawk duo. All weapons are fired from the modified Thunderhawk and they devastate Hawkwoman. Hawkman goes berserk at the death of his mate and starts bashing the Thunderhawk with his mace. Booster Gold and Shazam join their comrade and destroy the Thunderhawk which crashes and kills Matt Tracker with it.

Starro lunges at Ultraman and attempts to control his actions. Due to the cosmic humanoid’s disposition, Starro is unable to affect him. Ultraman takes advantage of Starro’s inability and rips his arms off; Starro is mortally wounded and soon dies. Frank Martin in the Golden Fox faces the Power Puff Girls. The Girls beat up Martin and the Fox crashes, killing Martin. The Power Puff Girls then join forces with Hawkman, Shazam and Booster Gold to destroy Ultraman.

Forest Region

Squirrel Girl uses her innate ability to communicate with Squirrels #1-15. The bushy-tailed rodents jump on Babe the Ox. Babe attempts to buck the Squirrels off its back to no avail. Although they are only nuisances, Babe (in a loss of control fit) kicks Bunyan across the forest. A disoriented Bunyan attempts to get up and is met by Mr. Immortal and Flatman. Flatman wraps his body around Bunyan. Mr. Immortal then pummels Bunyan in the face and kills the axe-wielding giant. Babe bucks around again, still attempting to dismount the Squirrels. Dormammu uses his mystical energy to fry Squirrels #1-15, off of Babe’s back. While all the Squirrels die in flames, the fires cause Babe to buck out of control. Babe tramples over Big Bertha and Squirrel Girl in the process. Still in an uncontrollable rage, Kong has to put Babe out of its misery.

The Blair Witch sees Darth Plagueis walking through the forest. Plagueis crouches into a battle stance and meets the witch. Dormammu steps in and uses his powers to fry the Blair Witch. Kong rushes after and grabs Mr. Immortal. Kong uses the strongman like a ragdoll and strikes his head repeatedly on the ground. Saruman arrives to the scene and with his dark wizardry kills Mr. Immortal. Plagueis locates Flatman and slices him in half. Kong sees Flatman and moves behind the bushes to use him as toilet paper.

The Final Battle

The remaining combatants are moved to the cityscape of the planet.

The remaining George Washington's Slaves are Agen Kolar, Amazo, Colossus, Santa Claus (w/ Ki Adi Mundi's old lightsaber), Darth Plagueis, Dormammu, Inspector Gadget, Jedi Masters #11-12, 14-17, King Kong, Loki, Saruman, Sauron, Super Soldier and Runner.

The remaining Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies are The Maxx, Speedy Gonzalez, Lobo, Hawkman, The Planeteers: Kwame, Wheeler, Linka, Gi, Ma-Ti and Suchi the Monkey, The Power Puff Girls: Blossom and Bubbles, The Technobots: Scattershot, Lightspeed and Strafe, Ron Popeil, Shazam, Grimlock, Booster Gold and Marines #3, 5, 6, 8-13.

Suchi the monkey throws its poo at the Slaves. Kong responds and Suchi suffocates in Kong’s dung. Lightspeed, Scattershot and Strafe transform into their robot modes and fire upon King Kong. Kong succumbs to the barrage of Transformer firepower. Wheeler hurls his powers of fire at Dormammu. Dormammu laughs at the flames and throws it back at him. Wheeler screams as he bursts into flames and becomes a singed corpse.

Agen Kolar leads Jedi Masters #11-12, 14-17. They are met by Lobo and the Maxx. The duo manages to murder all Jedi Masters. In the melee, Kolar kills the Maxx.

Inspector Gadget’s body folds into a giant mouse trap. Speedy Gonzalez is not fast enough to escape Gadget and the trap snaps shut, breaking the mouse’s neck. While still a mouse trap, Popeil rushes at Gadget and uses the Popeil Pocket Fisherman to tinker with Gadget’s form. Gadget has trouble reverting back into his humanoid guise. At the death of his battle partner, Grimlock comes upon Gadget and crushes him to pieces. Colossus, who has been missing since his flight from the city streets into the sewers, bursts from the drain pipe to the scene of the battle. As he rises from the depths, his head is ripped off by Grimlock’s jaws.

Agen Kolar, Darth Plagueis and Santa Claus meet Marines #3, 5, 6, 8-13. Kolar slices through Marines #3 and 5. Plagueis dices through Marines #6, 8-10. Claus beheads Marines #11-13. Scattershot, Lightspeed and Strafe, in robot form, come to the scene and kill Claus and Kolar. Plagueis escapes, but it is short lived as Lobo catches him and rips him apart. Sauron (who has been missing from the match, for what reason, good readers, shall be explained at a future date. . .) comes at Lobo and kills him. Sauron then joins Saruman, Loki and Dormammu. The magic and mystical wielders rip through the Planeteers. Loki fries Kwame. Saruman cooks Linka. Sauron mashes Gi. Dormammu smashes Ma-Ti.

In the air, Amazo captures Shazam and places him in a hold so that Shazam is defenseless. Super Soldier comes upon the two combatants and with lightning speed strikes. Shazam looks at Super Soldier and notices that his shield is bloodied. Shazam looks down and sees his intestines dripping from his stomach. Shazam dies, his last act being an attempt to push his guts back in his body. Hawkman swoops in and Amazo’s head is crushed in at the force used by Hawkman and his mace. Super Soldier flies in and kills Hawkman. Booster Gold attempts to best Super Soldier, but never reaches him as the Runner rips him apart with the power cosmic. The Runner then finishes off the remaining Technobots, Scattershot, Lightspeed and Strafe.

Popeil stands in front of Grimlock and is flanked on both sides by Bubbles and Blossom. They see the odds are against them. Dormammu, Loki, Saruman, Sauron, Super Soldier and Runner look to the remaining Murderflies.

Loki: Last words?

Popeil: We shall die with honor today!

Loki: That you shall.

Loki is about to signal his teammates to destroy the remaining enemy.

Popeil: But wait, there’s more!!!

Saruman: There is no more. . . .

Dormammu, Loki, Saruman, Sauron and the Runner release their energies upon the Murderflies. Blossom explodes at Dormammu’s hands. Bubbles implodes at Saruman’s hands. Popeil disintegrates at Loki’s hands. Grimlock melts at the Runner’s hands.

Murderflies: All dead.

Slaves: Dormammu, Loki, Saruman, Sauron, Super Soldier and the Runner.

GEORGE WASHINGTON’S SLAVES ARE VICTORIOUS!!!

The Untouchables Vs. Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve

The Untouchables are The W.I.L.D.C.A.T.S.: Spartan, Grifter, Zealot, Warblade, Maul, Voodoo, Lord Emp, & Void, Zombie Absorbing Man, Jason Todd on Batgirl's Motorcycle, The Fantastic Four: Mr. Fantastic, Invisible Woman, Human Torch, & Thing, Franklin Richards, She-Hulk, Sodom Yat, Soranak Natu, Bodikka, Tomar Tu, (Green Lantern) Sinestro, Romat Ru, The Avatar Benders: Aang w/ Appa, Katra, Sokka, Toph Bei Phong, & Zuko, Jacob Black, Emperor Han, Cad Bane, Spike in Gen. Grevious' Wheelbike, Darksol, Ben Tennyson, Gwen Tennyson, Grandpa Max, Dust, Kimura, (Red Lantern) Guy Gardner, Maestro, The Galaxy Trio: Vapor Man, Meteor Man, & Gravity Girl, Gree & Horatio Caine in an AT-ST, Megatron, The Constructicons: Hook, Bonecrusher, Mixmaster, Long Haul, Scrapper, & Scavenger, The Pretender Monsters: Icepick, Slog, Birdbrain, Bristleback, Scowl, & Wildfly, The Protectobots: Hot Spot, First Aid, Grooves, Blades, & Streetwise, The Insecticons: Bombshell, Kickback, & Shrapnel, Pyro, Mystique in an Arwing, Rachet, The Sorceress of Castle Grayskull, She-Ra w/ Swiftwind, Madam Razz, & Broom, Boromir, James Bond in an Ornithopter, Tinkerbelle (w/ lightsaber), Big Bird, Snuffeluffagus, Syrin, Green Arrow, Black Canary, MacGyver (w/ Red Lightsaber), Punisher, Dr. Polaris, The Atom, Ant Man, Ant Man 2, Maleficent, Merlin, (Female) Dr. Light, (Male) Dr. Light, Granny Goodness, The Female Furies: Lashina (w/ an Atlas), Gilotina, Bernadeth (w/ a Heat Axe), Stompa (w/ a Halberd), & Mad Harriet, Onslaught, Scourge w/ The Sweeps, (movie) Bumblebee, Matt Oblak (w/ Mandalorian Armor & Blue & Green Lightsabers) & Teresa Oblak (w/ Blue & Green Lightsabers) in a Ferrari F-50, The Legion of Super Heroes: Cosmic Boy, Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Phantom Girl, Bouncing Boy, Triplicate Girl, Timber Wolf, Chameleon Boy, & Karate Kid, (movie) Brawl, Capt. Cold, John Spartan in Battle Ram, Sgt. Todd in a tank, Kung Lao, Prof. Mognonagle, Broadside, Pikachu, & Legolas.

Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve are Galactus w/ Nova, Terrax, & Firelord, Anakin Skywalker w/ Ahsoka Tano, Mace Windu w/ Jedi Padawan #30, The Inhumans: Black Bolt, Medusa, Triton, Karnack, Gorgon, Crystal, Lockjaw, & Maximus the Mad, Green Lantern #1-2 & 4-5, 6 OA Guardians, Jade, Ajax, Barbarossa, Saint Walker, Indigo 1 & Monk, Dr. Doomsday, The Matrix Ghost Twins (w/ Green Lightsabers), Peter Petrelli, Sylar, Gimli son of Gloin, Scorpononk w/ Lord Zarock, Fin Fang Foom, Mindwipe & Borath, (Beast Wars) Megatron, Calypso, Ares: The god of War, Apollo, Hercules, Kratos, Faith (w/ Blue Lightsaber), Daniel Larussa (w/ Blue Lightsaber), Lord Voldemort, Yong Jedi Knight #1-10, Dark Jedi Master #25A-33A, The Pound: Michael Vick, Brandon Inge (w/ Green Lightsaber), Jack Bauer, Curtis Manning, Justin Oblak (w/ Mandalorian Armor), & Dexter, Matt Parkman, Hiro Nakamura, Claire Bennett, Tracy Strauss, The Haitian, Losho Yik, Manhunter #4-6, Nazgul #6 w/ Fell Beast, Charlie Brown, The Predicons, Sky Links, Droideka #1, Battle Droid #1, & Treasure Troll #25.

Events occur in real time........................

The following takes place between 8 AM & 9 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer, and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). From inside of the AT-ST Gree turns to Horatio Caine and says: "Sir; This is gonna be one huge match". Horatio takes off his sunglasses and replies with: "This is no match.... This is the whole season" (OHHHH... WON'T GET FOOLED AGAIN)!

Not since this team faced off against each other in the first ever FFL match has one between the 2 of them meant so much. With both of these teams in the middle of their best seasons to date, a play-off bid is almost inevitable for both of them. But looming even heavier over their heads is domination of the new AL Central Division, which will give one of their other-worldly owners namesakes' immortality. It was this sense of importance, that prompted even the likes of Galactus and Onslaught to actually "get up" for this match. The 2 of them have put aside their typical apathy and have come to realize that this match is a must win and that in order for their respective teams to win they are going to have to take on each other. It takes a while for Reed Richards and Ares to move their teams into position, but it seems as though they are both ready.

The following takes place between 9 AM and 10 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). From inside the AT-ST Gree turns to Horatio Caine and says: “Well sir, are we ready to begin”. Caine takes off his sunglasses and says: “Ready for World War 3” (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Onslaught and Galactus begin making their way toward one another, despite both being placed at the back of their team’s field. Galactus flies thru The Untouchables team with ease on his way to Onslaught. Galactus uses his incalculable cosmic powers to completely disintegrate Spartan, Grifter, Zealot, Warblade, Maul, Lord Emp, & Void. Zombie Absorbing Man goes crazy at the chance to absorb more power than he has ever been witness to, so he latches on to Galactus; but it is to much for him. He feels an amazing rush of power run thru him before he overloads and explodes. Galactus then “bends” Aang and his crew (get it) until they break before he crushes Jacob Black and Emperor Han under his powerful size-expanded feet. Ben Tennyson as Jet Ray does not put up much of a fight against the cosmic being, and his cousin Gwen and Grandpa Max put up even less. Galactus turns Dust into dust and punishes the Punisher and then does the same to Big Bird and his former-imaginary pal Snuffeluffagus (I still say Sesame Street jumped the shark when everybody else found out he was real). Dr. Light (the female/good version) is giggling like crazy in the cockpit of the ornithopter while James Bond is spitting some furious British game at her, but it does not stop them both from getting vaporized by the mighty Galactus along with Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Phantom Girl, Bouncing Boy, Triplicate Girl, Timber Wolf, & Chameleon Boy. Prof. Mognonagle bit it as well during Galactus’ epic reign of terror.

The following takes place between 10 AM and 11 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer, and this is the longest match of my life (beep_ beep_). Gree says to Horatio: “I don’t know about this sir, we seem to be getting our butt’s kicked so far”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “yeah galactically, I think it’s time for an onslaught”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Onslaught begins moving thru the Kennelz line with the same kind of ease that Galactus displayed with his team. Onslaught merely shuts off the Inhuman brains of Medusa, Karnack, Gorgon, Crystal, Lockjaw, & Maximus the Mad. He then shows that he is both stronger and more intelligent than Dr. Doomsday, when he causes him to physically crushed with his mind. Faith and the Ghost twins rush in with their lightsabers drawn, but they do not put up much of a fight against the all-powerful mutant. Onslaught is simply offended by Mindwipe’s name , because he believes that nobody has the right to a name like that as long as he exists, so he uses his magnetic powers to rip both him and his homeboy Borath apart. Matt Parkman leads the rush of Dark Jedi Masters, while Claire Bennett does the same with the Young Jedi Knights, but they all meet the same fate: Destruction at the hands of Onslaught. The Haitian and even the mighty Kratos are unable to defend against Onslaught’s powers as well. But after these easy victories, Onslaught finally finds himself toe-to-toe with Galactus.

The following takes place between 11 AM and 12 PM on the day The Kennelz fought the Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer, and this is the longest match of my life. Gree and Horatio look around at the destruction that has already been caused by this match when Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “Well sports fan, it’s time for the main event”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

The fight between Galactus and Onslaught from a spectators view looked like much more of a brawl than I thought it would. With the 2 of these ultra-powered combatants wailing on each other endlessly with their arsenal of attacks. Both have an amazing ability to take all kinds of physical, mental, & cosmic abuse, yet still continue to battle on. In the end though, Onslaught’s homo-superior mutant abilities, no matter how enhanced they have become still could not hold up against the cosmic abilities of Galactus. Galactus focused all of his power at Onslaught, and he eventually defeated the devourer of worlds. With this explosion of cosmic energy the collateral damage is severe for both teams as Mystique in her Arwing, Maleficent, Brawl, & The 3 Manhunters are destroyed.

The following takes place between 12 PM and 1 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer, and this is the longest match of my life. Gree and Horatio are shocked to see their star player go down, which prompts Horatio to take off his sunglasses and says: “I think our teammate just became an offslaught” (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Much like the last time the two of them met, Megatron cannot stand the thought of the imposter Megatron’s existence, and quickly stuns the Beast Wars Megatron with a blast from his arm-mounted laser cannon and then crushes the inferior Megatron with his bare hands. Out in the deep waters Broadside floats as a fallback position for The Untouchables. But both the Autobot and his teammates are unaware of the water squad that The Kennel have in position to take out the large Transformer. Triton, Calypso, & Tracey Strauss all approach and together use their water manipulation skills to capsized Broadside and then crush him under the powerful waves. The trio begins to swim back to the shore but when they get there they find another big showdown is about to happen.

The following takes place between 1PM and 2 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree and Horatio Caine see the battle that is about to take place, and Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “I think some of our guys have quite the magnetic personality. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Peter Petrelli gets within striking distance of Voodoo and Sylar peers into the mind of Dr. Polaris. Voodoo and Dr. Polaris are also joined by Cosmic Boy and The Female Furies who are under orders to stay put and protect the 3 metal manipulators at all cost. The Kennelz 4 green lanterns have similar orders about Sylar and Petrelli. With both teams now loaded with magnetic powers Transformers and other metal objects begin collecting in a metal graveyard in the desert area. Matt & Teresa in The Ferrari F50 jump on the gas to get as far away from the metal mess as possible, but their back-up Spike in the Wheelbike is not quite so lucky. He joins Bumblebee, Megatron, The Constructicons, The Pretender Monsters, The Protectobots, The Insecticons, Rachet, Scourge and the Sweeps in defeat. The Kennelz are hit with this just as hard as Ajax, Barbarossa, Scorpononk, Lord Zarock, The Predicons, Sky Links, Droideka #1, & Battle Droid #1 are sent into the battle’s communal graveyard. Tracy Strauss, Treasure Troll #25, Hiro Nakamura, Calypso, and The Kennelz 2 metal heroes Peter Petrelli & Sylar are all destroyed from the flying metal melee as well. Cosmic Boy leads The Female Furies, Voodoo, & Dr. Polaris against the 4 green lanterns. Stompa stabs green lantern #2 in the heart with her halberd, but her and the rest of the Furies fall at the ring-covered hands of the green lanterns. Dr. Polaris dies as well, but Cosmic Boy and Voodoo prove that they have more than just magnetic powers in their arsenal as they finish off what is left of the green lanterns. On a side note, the Karate Kid fights the Karate Kid and the one with the lightsaber wins.

The following takes place between 2 PM and 3 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree starts driving the AT-ST over toward the main battle ground on the grass-covered area of the play-off planet. They receive news of Reed Richards plan to take out Galactus and Gree asks: “Do you think The Fantastic Four has what it takes to kill Galactus, sir”? Horatio takes off his sunglasses and replies: “I’ll tell you what, after seeing that guy in action; I sure wish they were The Fantastic Forty”. (OHHHH... WON’T GETFOOLED AGAIN).

Galactus’ 3 heralds fly up to lend a hand to their master, but on the way The Galaxy Trio tries to stop them. Nova vaporizes Vapor Man, while Terrax rocks Meteor Man, and Firelord grounds Gravity Girl. The Fantastic Four (including Franklin Richards and She-Hulk) come flying up in The Fantasticar toward Galactus. His 3 heralds are there to protect him but The Richards has thought of this as well as Sodom Yat, Soranak Natu, Bodikka, Tomar Tu, Sinestro, & Romat Ru attack the heralds to clear the way for The Fantastic Four. Invisible Woman, Thing, Human Torch, & She-Hulk all jump out of The Fantasticar to attack Galactus and work as a diversion; but the diversion does not last nearly as long as they had hoped. Galactus uses his powers, might, & size to crush all 4 of them. Reed and his son are furious at the sight of their family members and teammates death which makes their resolve even stronger. Mr. Fantastic pulls out the handheld device that he has just created which has the ability to harness the power of his mutant son. Franklin just sits in the passenger seat and concentrates while Reed aims his device at Galactus. With his own powers and the aid of this technological marvel, Franklin is able to take over the near omnipotent mind of Galactus. Franklin can only muster enough will power to have the one thought that his dad has implanted into his head. With Galactus’ brain he thinks: “the only path to life is my death”. With this singular thought Galactus falls over dead. Reed Richards releases the hold that his machine has, but realizes that his success has cost the ultimate price as Franklin is a vegetable after having witnesses mentally the sheer power of Galactus. The 3 heralds die in their vain attempt to protect their master, but not before they take Soranak Natu & Bodikka with them.

The following takes place between 3 PM and 4 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep). Gree looks next to him and says: “Well sir, the Fantastic Four did, but what a price they had to pay”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “As far as Reed Richards is concerned, this day wasn’t so fantastic”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Voldemort works up a storm of evil magic that takes out The Sorceress of Castle Grayskull as well as Dr. Polaris and Dr. Light, before Sodom Yat puts the green energy smack down on the evil one and kills him. Ares leads Apollo and Hercules into battle against John Spartan in the Battle Track and Sgt. Todd in the Tank. The 3 Greeks manage to bust apart both of the massive vehicles as well as their drivers before they thaw out Capt. Cold and squash both of the Ant Men. The 3 relatives of Zeus are joined by Losho Yik who has his lightsaber drawn as the 4 of them rush into a melee with She-Ra and her crew. She-Ra seems to be outclassed as she removes the head of Hercules because her horse Swiftwind and her friends Madam Razz and Broom have met very quick deaths, but she receives some back-up. Legolas and his brother from another mother Green Arrow show up on one side while Black Canary and Boromir show up on the other. Losho Yik and Apollo manage to take out Boromir and Black Canary, but they fall to the well-placed arrows of the Emerald Archers shortly afterwards. Ares proves that he is not called the god of war for nothing as he uses his enormous axe to kill both Legolas and Green Arrow, but he then finds that his head is no longer attached to his body when She-Ra comes in from his weak side with a sword to the neck. Nazgul #6 flies in on his fell beast and lands directly on top of Granny Goodness to break her neck. He then crushes Tinkerbelle, mini-lightsaber and all in his iron gauntlet before he squares off against Merlin. Merlin’s magic is more powerful than that of the soulless Ringwraith, but the wizard cannot conjure a spell quick enough to avoid being run thru by the Mordor forged sword of the Nazgul. The Kennelz decide with the death of their leader Ares, and with Galactus being gone, that it is time to unleash their other sizeable opponent.

The following takes place between 4 PM and 5 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree turns to Horatio Caine and asks: “Sir, why do they call him Fin Fang Foom”? Horatio takes off his sunglasses and replies: “I don’t know; but at least we’ll know what to put on his headstone”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Fin Fang Foom thunders on to the scene with all 17 stories of his being ready to destroy anything previously deemed “Untouchable”. Fin Fang Foom swats both Romat Ru and Tomar Tu out of the sky, and then crushes both Kimura and Pyro, before he drops a boulder on the head of Cad Bane. Sodom Yat, Guy Gardner, and Sinestro all circle the huge dragon and barrage him with blasts of green and red energy. Fin Fang Foom seems to stumbling when Horatio Caine grabs the blaster controls of the AT-ST and places a perfectly placed blast bolt which serves as the killing blow to Fin Fang Foom.

The following takes place between 5 PM and 6 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep). Gree looks impressed as he turns to Horatio and says: “Nice shot sir”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and simply says: “Fin Fang Boom”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Cosmic Boy uses his powers to crush Nazgul #6 inside his own armor and then to drive the sword of The Ringwraith into the back of his fell beast. He then moves against Mace Windu, but before he can attack Mace’s padawan, who may have much to learn still uses his near mastery of the Vandpuun style of fighting that so few Jedi have ever mastered and kills Cosmic Boy with a head shot. Maestro makes quick work of Triton, but is then blown apart by a full force scream from Black Bolt. Mr. Fantastic sees this and sets the proper energy levels on every weapon aboard the Fantasticar. He then kamikaze crashes into his former Illuminati friend Black Bolt to join the rest of his family in giving the ultimate sacrifice for The Untouchables. Gimli then delivers an axe to the head of Kung Lao at 5:59:59 PM.

The following takes place between 6 PM and 7 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life. Gree turns to Horatio and says: “We’re taking heavy losses sir the death toll on both sides is huge”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “They don’t call it the big week for nothing”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Anakin and Ahsoka mow thru MacGyver before he can even ignite his lightsaber, on their way to Siryn who they kill almost as quickly. The Atom then climbs in thru the ear of Jade and kills her before she even knows that he is there.

The following takes place between 7 PM and 8 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree turns to Horatio and says: “I don’t know about this sir, it feels like we are losing”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “Sometimes even the narrator doesn’t know”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Sodom Yat Guy Gardner, and Sinestro decide that they need to take control of this match if they are going to finish off The Kennelz and end their 5 game win streak. They mop the air with Saint Walker, Indigo 1, & Monk, and then take out Master Windu’s Padawan as well.

The following takes place between 8 PM and 9 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree turns to Horatio and says: “Do you think we have what it takes sir”? Horatio takes off his sunglasses and replies with: “We’re gonna need something to light the way. It’s a good thing we brought lanterns”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Anakin leads his padawan Ahsoka and Gimli into battle against Darksol. Darksol casts Desoul, but Anakin is able to deflect with the force while Ahsoka and Gimli rush in and finish him off with a flurry of melee attacks.

The following takes place between 9 PM and 10 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: MY name is Jack Bauer, and this is the longest match of my life. Gree and Horatio Caine walk over in their AT-ST and see the dead body of the once mighty Darksol. Gree turns to Horatio and says: “I can’t believe those 2 little weird looking things were able to defeat Darksol”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “It looks like the guy with the beard just needed to axe him a few questions”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Mace Windu force leaps high into the air and simultaneously uses the force to hold Guy Gardner in place and to give him the physical strength to push thru his protective aura with his lightsaber to cut him in half. Mace then lands and finds himself surrounded by both Sodom Yat and Sinestro.

The following takes place between 10 PM and 11 PM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree turns to Horatio and says: “It is getting late sir”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and replies: “Not to late for the cavalry”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Mace is surrounded but seemingly out of nowhere The 6 OA Guardians show up to even the odds. A stand-off begins between these powerful green energy laden beings.

The following takes place between 11 PM and 12 AM on the day the Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life. Gree turns to Horatio and says: “This could be one heck of a showdown sir”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “I think we have a new meaning for “going green””. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

2 green lanterns should have no chance against all 6 of the Guardians of OA considering that they are in fact the creators and controllers of the very power that the green lanterns wield, but these are not just any 2 green lanterns. Sinestro unleashes a firestorm of green energy on the Guardians which rips them apart before the other Guardians are able to strip him off his power and kill his powerless Qwardian body.

The following takes place between 12 AM and 1 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest day of my life (beep_beep_). Gree turns to Horatio and says: “Do you think our boys have a chance at defeating those little blue guys sir”? Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “Those boys would give a snowball a chance back home in Miami”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

The Guardians never get the chance to take away Sodom Yat’s green energy power because before they can he unloads every ounce of it into the bodies of The Guardians topping Sinestro’s feat and killing 3 of them. The remaining Guardian moves to attack and finish Sodom Yat with his empty power ring, but Sodom Yat is still after all a Daxomite, and is far from powerless. Sodom Yat works up as much strength as he can and crushes the last remaining Guardian with his bare hands.

The following takes place between 1 AM and 2 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest day of my life (beep_beep_). Gree and Caine were headed towards the desert when a message comes in from the rest of the team. Gree turns to Horatio and says: The rest of the team is regrouping in the city and it sounds like the few remaining members of The Kennelz are as well sir”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “Well I guess it is time to turn this thing around in more ways than one”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

While the rest of the 2 teams are regrouping Mace Windu jumps into action against the weakened Sodom Yat and finishes him off with his purple lightsaber. Mace then begins running at Jedi speed to meet up with his team and see this battle to the end one way or another.

The following takes place between 2 AM and 3 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree and Horatio show up in the heart of the city where the 2 teams seem to mounting up for the final battle. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “Time for the main event” (OHHHH.... WON’T GET. FOO....) Gree interrupts with: “Didn’t you already use that one sir”? Caine points at Gree and says: “HEY nobody interrupts me or The Who (he takes his sunglasses back off before he finishes the sentence) unless they wanna get hurt”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Matt & Teresa race up in their Ferrari with Jason Todd following behind them on Batgirl’s Motorcycle. But Anakin and Ahsoka run towards them head on and take out the tires on both vehicles. The passengers all escape and regroup with their team, but the vehicles are destroyed.

The following takes place between 3 AM and 4 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). What is left of The Untouchables rallies around the legs of Gree and Horatio’s AT-ST, which prompts Horatio to take off his sunglasses and say: “Looks like we got the band back together”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).


Michael Vick gets what is left of his team together behind a fallen billboard and says: “We wait for them to show up and then it’ll be time for the Dog Pound to wrap this match up once and for all”. “You ready son” he adds as he pats The Mandalorian Armored Golden Boy on the back (Justin has painted his armor gold, to go with his super-hero nickname by the way).


The following takes place between 4 AM and 5 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest day of my life. Gree turns to Horatio and says: Well sir, I guess this is it”. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “I think it’s about time to pound the pound”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Little do The Untouchables know that Curtis and Bauer actually pulled a covert ops mission earlier and rigged the AT-ST up to explode. But Horatio was brighter than they though and deactivated the remote activator on the bomb. When Jack tells Curtis to detonate the bomb and nothing happens, Michael Vick’s Kennelz quickly figure out what Caine must have done. Curtis throws down the remote and says with vigor: “Well, I can still detonate it manually” Curtis then rushes into enemy territory (We’re only talking like twenty feet away here people) and uses his M-16 to blow up the charges that he has in place. Curtis manages to destroy the mini-imperial walker, but Horatio and Gree jump out and escape in time.

The following takes place between 5 AM and 6 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest day of my life (beep_beep_). Horatio shakes off the blast from the AT-ST and then takes off his sunglasses and says: “It’s time to put these dogs to sleep”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

The battle begins with Pikachu frying Charlie Brown and Dexter pouncing on the Pokemon and eating him for breakfast (literally, it’s almost 6 in the mourning, these teams are starving). Individual fights seem to begin as the match comes to a close.

The following takes place between 6 AM and 7 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables: My name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Gree turns to Horatio and says: Good luck sir. Horatio takes off his sunglasses and says: “Let’s tell the Kennelz to crate up”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Bauer leads Vick and Inge against Jason Todd who is in a fighting stance that Batman would be very proud of. Gree blasts Dexter, but the dog is avenged quickly by Justin who burns Gree alive with his suit’s built in flame-throwers. Anakin moves against She-Ra, while Mace brings Gimli along to help him our against Horatio. Ahsoka squares off against Teresa who has both of her lightsabers drawn and ignited and Matt goes up against Danielson in a lightsaber duel as well, which ends with Matt deflecting Daniel‘s lightsaber with his green one while he puts the blue one into his chest in the last minute of the hour..

The following takes place between 7 AM and 8 AM on the day The Kennelz fought The Untouchables, my name is Jack Bauer and this is the longest match of my life (beep_beep_). Horatio sees who is coming at him and although Gree isn’t there to hear it anymore takes off his sunglasses for the last time and says: “Huh, a Jedi Master and a Dwarf Lord, I must be doing something right”. (OHHHH... WON’T GET FOOLED AGAIN).

Horatio unloads his pistol at Mace and Gimli and throws down a couple of killer moves he learned in the hood, but in the end cannot handle the double-teamed assault of Mace and Gimli. Teresa is getting pretty good with her double lightsaber technique, but she isn’t quite as practiced as Ahsoka who is able to get her with a lightsaber to the chest. She-Ra surprises everyone when she is able to dodge the lightsaber thrusts of Anakin and then finish him off with a sword to the neck, but she is then overtaken by Mace and Ahsoka who are done with their opponents. Michael Vick and Brandon Inge both rush in against Jason Todd, and are both met with batarangs to the neck, Vick dies instantly as if he were an electrocuted dog, but Inge with his dying breath throws his lightsaber to his BFF Justin “The Golden Boy” Oblak. Justin catches the lightsaber and then squares off toe to toe with his brother, who like him is suited in Mandalorian Armor. Jack Bauer begins battling with Jason Todd. The former sidekick of Batman is fast, but Jack is even faster. Jack evades Todd’s aerial attack an then knocks Jason to the ground and wraps his ankles around his neck. Jack then snaps Jason Todd’s neck with his feet. Justin looks at his brother and says to him: “You don’t really expect to win do you, I’ve always been the golden boy”. “Yeah, but I’m still you’re older brother” Matt says as he attacks Justin with both of his lightsabers spinning. Justin looks at Matt and says: “Oh, I see you need 2 lightsabers to compete with my skills”. Matt replies with: “I guess there are no rules in love and war”. The Golden Boy asks: “Which one is this”? Justin is then knocked to the ground by a swift kick from Matt, but once down he shoots a blaster bolt from his wrist that knocks Matt’s green lightsaber to the ground. Justin then hops up with the aid of his jetpack and moves at his brother with blinding speed. Justin tries to attack up high, but Matt goes low with his lightsaber and simultaneously answers Justin’s question. “A bit of both” Matt says as he catches his only brother just under the neck with his lightsaber. Matt is standing over the body of his dead brother when Jack Bauer pulls the knife from his boot and aims it perfectly into the kink in the neck of the Mandalorian Armor to kill Matt Oblak.
MICHAEL VICK’S BAD NEWZ KENNELZ OF LURVE ARE VICTORIOUS!