Week 7 Democracy: Darkseid's Horsemen of Apokolips Vs. Dolla 49 McRib

 Darkseid's Horsemen of Apokolips are 

-Posiedon (final death).

-Qwsp. 

-King Sidon 

-Diddy & Dixie Kong (w/ Maula Pistols). 

-Kamek

-The Tiger Sharks:  Mako, Walro, Gupp, Octavia, & Lorca. 

-Gilligan, The Skipper too, w/ Thurston Howell III, Lovery Howell, Ginger Grant, The Professor, & Mary Ann Summers in The SS Minnow.

-Vito Corleone (w/ a blue lantern ring).

-Michael Corleone (w/ a green lantern ring).

-Indigo One

-Booster Gold w/ Skeet.

-Decepticon #1-5.

Dolla 49 McRib is:

-3 Lightning Benders

-Aquagirl

-Blue Beetle

-Doomsday

-Ultraman

-Dr. Fate

-Piccollo

-World Serpent

-Gambit

-Barney Moss  

Darkseid's Horsemen of Apokolips Vs. The Underhills

 Darkseid's Horsemen of Apokolips are Nekron, (*BL denotes Black Lantern) BL Darkseid,  BL Supergirl, BL Shazam, BL Apocalypse, Zombie BL, Vampire BL, Ganondorf (w/ Infinity Gauntlet, power & Time Stones), Vampire Juggernaut, Red Hood (w/ red lantern ring), Arsenal (w/ red lantern ring and rito bow), John Constantine, Red Robin (w/ 2 ninja swords), Eric Cartman (in Hulk buster ironman suit), & Paradoom #4.

The Underhills are Bizarro Superman, Blue Lantern #4A, Jessica Cruz, Larfleeze, Atrocitus, Raven, Parasite, X-24, Neo (w/ 2 blue lightsabers), Blue Wizard #1, Aule & Yavanna, & Ser Duncan the Tall.

   

David Byrne's Meat Suits Vs. The Sigmaz

 David Byrne's Meat Suits are The Watchmen:  The Comedian, Night Owl, Silk Spectre (w/ a purple lightsaber), Ozymandias, & Rorshach (w/ an orange lightsaber), Galactus w/ His herald David Byrne (w/ Gloom Sword), Scarlet Witch & Quicksilver, Trogdoor the Burninator, Unalq, Desna, Eska, Bolin, Maku, Pabu, Hal Jordan, The Noid, Freddy Kruegar, Gobo, Red, Wembley, Mokey, Boober, Uncle Traveling Matt, Mick Foley, & Dark Side Marauder #1-5.

The Sigmaz are Volodamir Zelensky, Reflector: Spectro, Spyglass, & Viewfinder, Mechanek, Stratos, Elita One, Powerglide, Radahn, Robot Sonic, Asura, Tai Lung, The Terminator(3), Hellboy, King Randor, King Hiss, Odin, & Sigrun.

   What's good Slime?!!?  It's everybody's favorite Watcher here, The Neon Master Pogo.  Coming at you from Escanaba in the daylight; but that Sun in the distance sure isn't doing much to warm this place up.  I'm freezing my buns of steel off and I haven't even got this flaming turd started yet.  These teams are way too cold for strategy and game plans and just decide to get the fighting started.  A guy's gotta do something to keep warm.  

 I thought I would start this match out with Sigrun squaring off against Uncle Traveling Matt, because I didn't have any idea who either one of them were.  Then I looked them both up and remembered that I know exactly who Uncle Traveling Matt is and that I really need to go back and watch Fraggle Rock again as an adult because that character bops, and me being the terrible Watcher that I am probably should have based this entire match on that character discovering The Upper Peninsula of Michigan and writing back to his nephew Gobo about it.  So, I started to formulate this whole process in my head and then decided that I should look up Sigrun next to find out how the story goes from there; but as it turns out Sigrun is actually super powerful and Uncle Traveling Matt definitely can't hang with her 1 V. 1 and I am not about to erase all the stuff I just wrote; so we will go with Sigrun one shotting him instead.  These next cats though, I know are total dawgs in an arctic setting and they are teaming up with some other peeps from Avatar.  Unalaq, Desna, Eska, are with Bolin, Mako, & Pabu and are doing all kinds of cool stuff against Odin, who everybody who doesn't even have wikipedia knows is like super powerful and stuff; but that doesn't stop them from doing all kinds of things against the guy who gave birth to Thor.  Well, he didn't really give birth to him, his wife did most of the work; but he was totally involved in the process if you know what I mean.  And when I say they are doing a lot of cool stuff and moves and such to Odin, I really mean it.  Like the whole kit and kaboodle of fight moves.  Like the really good type of fight moves too.  At one point Unalaq even stood up and was like "Hey kids, let's kill this guy" and he was a really tough guy, "before he kills us".  Which is a really bold thing to say about a god from Norse mythology, especially the god who is supposed to be in charge of all the other gods.  But instead Odin, was like "Hey.....  I heard him say "Hey"......  I'm still a really powerful god here and I don't really care how good you are all supposed to be in this setting, I'm still gonna kill you before you kill me.  So he did.  And then King Hiss bit Boober.  Not beause he was a heterosexual and thought about how much he like boobs or boobers in this case; but because he is a snake.  And Hellboy, even though he is a good guy now and doesn't really like to talk about how he is from Hell.  And to tell you the truth he would rather you didn't talk about it either.  And if you do he would rather you just talk about it to people saying that they shouldn't talk about it.  Use discretion is how he would have put it.  He didn't say it that way though, that's just how I said it, because he is from Hell and they don't really use nice words like that all that often, but I do up here where I wasn't born in Hell.  Anyway, being from Hell; and also now being a good guy, Hellboy isn't supposed to really laugh at people like Wembley when their guts fly all over the place after they have been punched into goo by a huge fist; but that was the problem.  Because Hellboy still did laugh about it and he realizes that he should probably feel bad about it, but he doesn't and he really shouldn't have to.  This is a deathmatch after all and it is what everyone was sent here to do.  The Terminator from Terminator 3 is just like the terminators from the first two movies but he is older and more experienced because as it turns out he has already been in two other Terminator movies before he was in the third one.  So this Terminator, the third one that is decides that he is going to fight against all five of the dark side marauders.  Now a dark side marauder is really tough, but did you know that there is something even tougher than a dark side marauder.  I do.  It's two dark side marauders.  But actually, there is something even tougher than two dark side marauders.  That would be three dark side marauders.  And as it would turn out there is even something tougher than three dark side marauders.  Do you know what that would be??  WRONG.  It is four dark side marauders and I have a feeling that you had something else in mind.  Oh.  You didn't??  I'm not sure I believe that.  But I do believe this.  I do believe this and that thing I believe is that there is something even more powerful than four dark side marauders.  That thing that I believe is more powerful than four dark side marauders is five dark side marauders.  There is another thing out there that is even more powerful than five dark side marauders.  Does anyone know what it is??  Did someone just say six dark side marauders??  Well, that isn't it.  What are you stupid or something??  It is a Terminator.  The one from Terminator 3.  Tai Lung was wondering if he was quicker than silver or as witchy as Scarlet; but it turned out that he wasn't.  I don't know if you know this but he is from Kung Fu Panda and he isn't even a panda.  He does like snow; but he was no match for a witch that was Scarlet and a silver that was quick.  Asura wanted to take this conversation, this story, this periodical to a different level.  To a more serious level.  A level of seriousness that this serious match deserves.  So Asura decided to take on Galactus who is a very serious character.  But instead Galactus used his cosmic powers, because his powers are very cosmic and he made a bunch of very serious and very cosmic poop in a very serious and very cosmic diaper and put it on Asura's face.  It was a diaper.  And you know what diapers are like don't you??  They have poop in them.  And they smell.  At least most poop I have run into smells.  Hasn't that been your experience with poop too.  It's smelly.  Elita One, Powerglide, and Robot Sonic are all robots.  You wouldn't know it by their names except for Robot Sonic.  In his case he puts the fact that he is a robot right in his name.  His name is Robot Sonic.  He doesn't just go by Sonic.  He lets you know he is a robot version.  They decide that they are gonna get in a fight.  Or their central processors or whatever decide for them.  Because they're robots.  They have robot brains.  Not human ones.  Robots.  So, anyway these fellas, robot fellas decide that they are gonna pick a fight with The Watchmen.  Do you know about them.  They were in a movie and comic book.  And they are really edgy.  Which is what the kids like these days.  It's almost all of The Watchmen, but they don't have Dr. Manhattan.  And the problem with not having Dr. Manhattan on your Watcmen team is that he is actually the best one; so when they try to fight a bunch of big robots, they don't do very good.  In fact they do kind of bad.  They actually lose.  Then there was this guy Radahn.  Now I went to Wikipedia to look him up and says this.  It says.  Well, it says the following.  It says this, it says that Radahn, yeah this guy Radahn is a powerful demigod.  It says he is also known as the "Lord of the battlefield".  That quite a thing to say.  It also says he is the "Starscourge".  It says that because he has a mastery of gravity magic which he used to halt the stars movement.  It says he is the son of Rennala and Radagon, he is a tragic figure you see who was once celebrated warrior who became a mindless beast yet still commands immense respect and power even in his weakened state.  It says that he is famous for his massive size, his loyal steed.  This fella by the name of Leonard and his iconic Starscourge Greatswords.  Not just swords, but great swords.  They are a lot like regular swords but a lot more great.  It says all that ya see.  But Radahn, this guy Radahn, remember him that I just told you all those things about he was no match for Hal Jordan, especially when this fella Hal, was teamed up with his friend Freddy.  I call him Freddy because we go way back, but with his surname included he goes by Freddy Kruegar.  Now that Radahn fella that I says all that stuff about was no match for Hal and Freddy ya see. Because Fred had some sharp claws and Hal had a ring.  A green one.  On their hands ya see.  Red and Mokey were hanging out together but they aren't very big.  Ya see they are a thing called a Fraggle.  Fraggles are quite little.  Just little guys named fraggles.  They ran into a couple of tough hombres by the name of Stratos and Mechaneck.  Now those may seem like unusual names to you and me; but they are from Eternia.  Yeah.  It's a place called Eternia and when you're on Eternia names like Mechanek and Stratos are like Bill and Jim.  They grow em pretty big on Eternia too and when they go to fight against those fraggles we were talking about.  You remember those fraggles we were talking about.  Well, they win the fight ya see.  There was also this fella named Reflector; but ya see this fella named Reflector was actually made up of three gentlemen who go by the names Spectro, Spyglass, and Viewfinder.  They meet up with this guy Mick Foley who starts bashing his face into the side of their metal bodies to get himself all bloody, because it wouldn't be Mick Foley if he wasn't all bloody.  But the problem with too much blood loss is that it can kill ya.  And that's what happened to that Mick fella.  He died.  Volodamir Zelensky was there too.  Remember that guy from the news a while back.  He was the guy who didn't have a suit, but he used to dress up like he was one of those homos.  He is from a place call The Ukraine and I guess over there, over by Russia over there in this place called The Ukraine they have a lot of homos.  They wear a lot of black chaps and stuff that shows off their butts.  Because they're homos.  He was supposed to be a big part of this match before I decided to go a different route with it.  He was gonna blow up Trogdoor the Burninator, who is actually a dragon.  But he was gonna blow up that Trogdoor fella with all the weapons that he got from The United States; but I think they all got used up in Iran before he could do that; so he didn't.  Or actually we will say he did blow that dragon up because the media lies to us.  You know those politicians they are all liars.  Like that Bill Clinton fella.  Remember him??  He said he didn't have sexual relations with that woman; but as it turned out, he did actually have sexual relations with her.  That Zelensky fella ended up dying in that bomb too; but what he didn't do was have sexual relations with a woman.  Because he was from this place called The Ukraine.  And they are all homos there.  King Randor fought with The Noid which many of you might not think would be a great fight; but as it turns out they both had really big hammers.  Randor actually had the smaller hammer; but he had the bigger muscles which answers the age old question.  That famous adage that big muscles are better than big hammers.  Remember that Odin fella??  Well, he is still here and he isn't done fighting with other fellas from that other team.  So, he decides to take on that guy Hal, and his friend, that other guy Fred.  You remember him don't cha??  And that girl Scarlet and that fella Silver.  That fella Silver is that chick Scarlet's brother as it turns out.  I don't know if I mentioned that earlier.  Well, anyway Odin decides he is gonna take all four of them on at once.  That would be a tough thing to do I he were like you or me; but he isn't.  He is one of those gods.  Not like the real God or anything, we are talking a bout a god with a small g, not the God with a big G.  While he is doing that Galactus decides that he is going to fight all those robots we mentioned earlier.  Do you remember all those robots.  Well in case you don't there were several robots that we mentioned earlier.  Well, in case you forgot there was that fella named Reflector who was really three fellas by the names of Spectro, Spyglass, and Viewfinder.  And there were those other robot fellas by the names of, well they went by the names of Elita One, Powerglide, The Terminator, and then there was that fella named Robot Sonic.  Now, I don't think I need to remind you about Robot Sonic and I don't think I need to remind you that Robot Sonic was a Robot.  Ya see, that was a fella who was nice enough to put the robot part right into his name.  Now these robot fellas couldn't quite take out Galactus but they did do a number on his pal David.  David Byrne was his full Christian name.  And he had a thing called a Gloom Sword.  Not a doom sword, because he didn't bring Doom with it, he brought Gloom.  Those robots were big and strong.  Much bigger and stronger than us flesh and blood fellas ya see.  They were robots after all.  Those robots made short work of that Dave fella.  Odin wasn't able to take down that foursome of tough guys that he took on either; but Silver and Fred didn't make it out ya see. Which left some of those Eternians we mentioned earlier.  You remember the Eternians don't ya??  They were the fellas from Eternia.  And they were hanging out with Sigrun and Hellboy who were some pretty tough hombres as well.  

But ya see, none of that is all that important.  I was just telling you that to lead up to the real story I came here to tell.  Ya see, this is a story about a fella I met named Gobo.  Kind of a silly sounding name for someone like me or you; but ya see this wasn't a fella like me or you.  This is a different kind of fella.  A fella by the name of Gobo.  Ya see Gobo, this fella named Gobo.  Ya see he was a Fraggle.  And Fraggles aren't like you and me.  And this Fraggle, well this fella who was a fraggle he had a mission.  It was a mission from the fantasy fantasy league to take out this whole team of fellas called The Sigmaz.  And this was gonna be a tough mission, because the Sigmaz, yeah these fella who call themselves The Sigmaz are a tough bunch of mother scratchers.  At least that is what I call tough guys, I don't know what you call them.  So these Mother Scratchers called the Sigmaz they were probably gonna be ready for a fight when this fella Gobo, my friend Gobo who I had done some talking with showed up for the fight.  So Gobo, that Fraggle fella set out for quite a journey.  A journey that was especially large for suh a small fella, because the thing about a fella like Gobo is that he is really small.  He's a small fella, but that is pretty common for fellas who are fraggles.  Fraggles are all small fellas.  At least the ones I have met.  So, anyway as the match begins Gobo makes his way through the frozen tundra of Escanaba.  This place isn't always frozen it actually gets pretty warm during the Summer, which is what Summers tend to do as I understand it; but  this is winter and winters are cold.  Especially in Escanaba, and especially for a fella that isn't very large.  Like a fraggle.  They don't have much body fat to keep them warm because he is small ya see.  Fraggles are small.  And this Gobo fella is Fraggle.  So, Gobo starts running.  Because he wants to get to the battle fast, and the fastest way to get to a battle like this is to run.  So, Gobo shows up to the battle; but as it turns out the battle is already over.  I guess Gobo was too late for the battle ya see.  Gobo missed the whole damn battle.  

Which brings me to the moral of this story which is simple.  If you want to get somewhere on time, you should not have really small legs. 

Week 6: Cowboy Killers vs 1992 Space Movie

 The Cowboy Killers are:

Galadriel w/ Inigo Lantern Ring, Darth Malgus w/ Red Lantern Ring, Ultron, The Deluxe Incecticons (Venom, Barrage, Chop Shop, and Ransack), Beast Wars Megatron, The Inhumans (Black Bolt, Lockjaw, Medusa, Karnak, Maximus, and Triton), Surtur, William Howard Taft w/ baseball bat, Vladimir Putin w/ Crysknife, and 12 orcs.

 

1992 Space Movie are:

Capt. N The Gamemaster w/ Duke and Gameboy, Wedge Antilles & Rowdy Roddy Piper w/ baseball bat in Wedge’s Snow Speeder,  Twincast w/ Decibal and Legout, Cybertronian Guardians #1-3, Cybertronian Guardians 4 & 5 (final lives), Skywarp, Tommy Oliver The Green Ranger w/ White Lantern Ring, Chuck Norris, Herbie the Elf, She-Ra and Swiftwind, Krypto, Bat-Mite w/ Dwarf Ring #6 (Final Life), Ch’p and Dr. Ub’x, Carnage w/ the ring of Volthoom, Cade Skywalker, Biggs Darklighter, Edwin Zacharski, Jerry Zacharski, John Zacharski, Walter Day, and Andrew Laidlaw in the Outlaw, Thundarr the Barbarian, Princess Ariel (not the mermaid), Ookla, Mok, Detective Lubic w/ 12 gauge pump shotgun, Seeker #13, and Sharkticon #10.

 

The race for the National League is heating up as these two teams step into the frigid air of Escanaba. It so cold that despite the hype for this NLCS rematch many of the teams’ members have resorted to contemplating their existence when met with the harsh realities of Michigan’s Upper Peninsula.

 

“What is the point of this?” ponders Rowdy Roddy Piper as he sits around the fireplace in a remote cabin. “Why of all places are we in this freezing ass hell hole? Just to fight die, and repeat. There has to be more to life than this.”

Chuck Norris steps over to respond “I have lived and died here as well as the real world. Life is beautiful. The struggle is the purpose.”

“Wait, real life, what are you talking about?” Responds a baffled RRP when Bat-Mite walks over and hands him a pair of glasses.

“With these you can see who really controls you.” Says Bat-Mite before disappearing elsewhere to battle. The team gets the signal and RRP hops into the snow speeder with Wedge.

 

Meanwhile in Delta Masonic Lodge #195….

 

“What is that hunk of iron over there?” Taft inquires as he scrubs his back with a Loofah.

Pointing over to Beast Wars Megatron, Putin replies in his thick Russian accent “Sir, that is a robot. It is a conscious, highly intelligent advanced being.”

 

“Applesauce!” exclaims Taft as he rinses water over himself. “That appears to be a large weapon of destruction. You people from the future may think yourselves smart but that is a demon. Hand me my towel.”

 

Putin hands him his towel as Taft stands up from the bathtub, without difficulty.

 

“Listen commie, don’t be a nance, avert your gaze.” Taft dries himself off as he continues “Humans are conscious, they create. We have created everything around you that you see. We have survived and thrived in this treacherous climate we find ourselves in today. That requires consciousness, creativity.” He puts on his trousers.

 

“Lookie here.” As he picks up his baseball bat. “Look at the curves, then engineering, the love that went into crafting this. Babe Ruth himself hit 42 round trippers with this particular bat for the loveliest game that humanity has created. He named it Old Sam. Only a conscious being could create something so beautiful and name it. That thing over there. That is an overpowered abacus.” Taft buttons up his shirt.

With that Megatron transforms into a T-Rex, moves inches from Taft’s face, and lets out a loud roar. Taft is completely unfazed.

 

“Terrible Lizard and a demon! I had heard falsehoods of those in my day. I see that the future is keen on combining fairy tales.” He puts on his vest and hat. “This will do for our purposes”. With that he grabs Old Sam and climbs on the back of Megatron. “Time to see the elephant!” as he straightens out his mustache and rides off on Megatron, leading the Cowboy Killers into battle.

 

Both teams meet on the battlefield where things quickly become chaotic and confusing. The snow and wind are making it difficult to see precisely what is happening. Almost everyone has a look of misery on their face as they endure the extremely cold temperatures. I see what appears to be Capt. N firing his blaster while Duke and Krypto bite Galadriel’s legs. Gameboy’s screen appears frozen. Surtur appears to be struggling to even survive but his existence is making the temperature tolerable for everyone else. The orcs appear to be confused as some are fighting each other not realizing who they are and others are engaging Thundarr the Barbarian. I see Wedge circling around the Insecticons with his tow cable. While riding Megatron, Taft plays polo with the heads of Detective Lubic and Herbie the Elf.

 

The weather appear to calm momentarily as Cybertronian Guardians #4 & 5 make their Japanese creators proud as they kamikaze into the center of the action, creating a massive explosion and indiscriminately doing massive damage to both teams.

 

After some time Rowdy Roddy Piper lifts his head in the crashed snow speeder. He gets out and makes haste for his team’s cabin.

 

Taft picks himself up out of the snow, brushes off his shoulders and begins to assess the situation. He sees a man running in the distance.

“Man of metal, are you of any further use?”

Megatron responds “I still function” before transforming back into a T-Rex.

 

Back in the cabin where he has regrouped with Chuck Norris, Rowdy Roddy Piper puts the glasses on that were given to him by Bat-Mite.

“I can see it, we are being watched!”

 

Just then a T-Rex stomps through the roof of the cabin. It immediately chews Chuck Norris with its mighty jaw and swallows him. Taft climbs down from Megatron.

 

“President Taft! I need to show you something!” exclaims RRP. But Taft wastes no time slamming him with his bat.

 

“It’s Chief Justice Taft to you, ragamuffin!” as he hits him several more times.

 

RRP pulls out his bat and slams Taft on the back of his head knocking him to the ground. “Please, try these on” as he tries to put his glasses on Taft.

 

Taft regains his composure and slams RRP in the face with his bat. “I will never insult my face with the clothing of a peasant!”

He then swings repeatedly into RRP ribs and stomach.

“Come on you dewdropper, do you have any drive in you at all?”

RRP flails around for his bat, grabs it and manages to connect with Taft’s kneecap.

“What a weak sister, you can do better!” then RRP swings hard and takes out his other knee, bringing Taft to the floor.

 

“Mr Presid-I mean Chief Justice, please try these on!” as his swollen hands fumble trying to put the glasses on Taft, who resists and punches his throat causing RRP to gasp for air. This gives Taft a moment to compose himself. Standing again he grabs his bat, takes a few steps and begins winding up.

 

“I knew a softie like you would be no match for Old Sam!” as he inflicts great pain into RRP’s vertebrae.

 

“Old Sam? That is MY bat’s name, it used to belong to The Great Bambino himself!” RRP tries to hold up the bat as Taft knocks it out of his hands, followed by a pummeling of swings into his sides. Taft lowers his mouth towards RRP’s ear.

 

“I would normally have a few words for a man before I end his life. A tramp like you does not deserve niceties!” But before he can act RRP head butts him and rises to his feet. He picks up his bat and gives him a thwack on the hip followed by a blow to the chin and the back of his head.

 

RRP tosses down his bat and searches for the glasses. Taft is on his side barely conscious when he sees both blood stained bats on the ground. They appear to have identical autographs.

“Bunny! Your bat is a forgery!” but then he looks closer. The wood grain matches exactly.

 

“I’ll try the glasses” he says, intending to give himself some time to regroup. Taft stands up and gestures towards RRP that he will take the glasses and gives him a knuckle sandwich.

A violent exchange of fists ensues.

 

“C’mon you rube, is that all you can muster!” Taft taunts. RRP then feeds him a haymaker that knocks him back to the ground. RRP picks up the glasses and forces them onto Taft, who suddenly can see that he is being watched.

 

“Eureka! You sir are a solid citizen after all!”

 

Just then a hole blasts open in the side of Megatron, extinguishing his spark. A battered Chuck Norris emerges.

“I see the two of you have made an important discovery. Come with me, I have something to show you”.

Chuck then brings them to a far off place. It is a mysterious place with many rooms. They look around and see many rooms full of monitors. On the screens they see battles of what looks like many of the other members of the league. The monitors in one of the rooms looks very familiar, with dead bodies strewn all over the ground.

Then it clicks for Taft. “That’s where we fought earlier. I see the lodge, the cabin, the field where we fought!”

“Yes, this is the league HQ, where we make sure everything is running to plan. And now you know too much.” Chuck quips with barely a moment’s pause before he promotes them to their next lives with a singular round house kick.

FFL 2026 Week 6: Doctor's Madhouse vs. The Goobers

The Doctor’s Madhouse: Powergirl, Highfather, Blue Marvel, Franklin Richards, Hancock, Avatar Wan, Water Bender #1-5, Blood Bender #1-2, The Penguin, Frosty the Snowman, Vixen, Blade, Elrond w/ Elven Ring, Elf #9-10 (both Final Death), John & Ted, & Predator #1-20 (Predator #1 is Final Death)

Grayson, Jack, & Ben’s Goobers: Mr. Freeze, Red Hulk, Ghost Rider (Johnny Blaze), Winter Soldier w/ Sam Bonser, Tom Brady & Jake Moody in the Zombieland Hummer, Sub-Zero, The Incredibles: Mr. Incredible, Elastigirl, Violet, Dash, Jack-Jack, & Frozone, Shadow the Hedgehog w/ all of the Chaos Emeralds, The Fantastic Four: Mr. Fantastic, Human Torch, The Thing, and Zombie Invisible Woman, Conner Weidman: The Drink w/ J.R.R. Tolkien & Blaze the Cat in a Tesla Cybertruck, Legends Luke Skywalker w/ a Blue Lantern Ring in a T-16 Skyhopper, George Bush in a F-5 Tiger, Omniman, Frost Giant #1-3, Star Destroyer Pilot and Star Destroyer Co-Pilot in a Twin Pod Bespin Cloud Car, Home One Pilot in a MiG-29, Home One Co-Pilot in a MiG-29

Hello everyone, we have a match today between The Doctor’s Madhouse and Grayson, Jack, & Ben’s Goobers at Michigan Upper Peninsula small hunting town of Escanaba, specifically on the date of January 1, 2026.

Let me set the scene for you…

Escanaba has just seen a record snowfall, upwards of 27 inches. Docs Madhouse has just set up camp for the night, deep in the forest. Unbeknownst to them, The Goobers are walking the trails of the forest looking for them. 

After scouring all of the trails of Escanaba, Mr. Fantastic stops the team and says “They must be far off the beaten path, we must brave this snow and search the Forest.” Conner takes charge with the Cybertruck and leads the way. He gets about 20ft off the trail until his Cybertruck gets stuck. Wintersoldier tries to do the same and also gets his Hummer stuck. Both vehicles' occupants get out of their respective vehicles and walk the rest of the way.   

Omniman flies up in the air to scout ahead, he eventually returns to the group reporting that The Docs Madhouse has set up camp about a ¼ mile ahead. Mr. Fantastic orders “Team, we will walk ahead until we get to their camp, once we do, I want us to surround the camp, and on my command, we strike. I’ll have our ships fly in and attack once we’ve attacked, I don’t want their loud ships to awaken the Madhouse.”

The Goobers arrive at the camp of the Madhouse and begin to surround them, Dash snickers and quietly whispers to Violet “Wow, The Madhouse must have been bored, they built a snowman.”

Everyone gets in position, Mr. Fantastic looks around and counts down from 5 using his fingers. 5…, 4…, 3… when all of a sudden Conner Weidman is hit in the chest with multiple bullets, Shadow has been pierced through the chest by a spear, Tolkien and Blaze Cat are blown up by a rocket, the Frost Giants are missing and only leave a trail of blood, Sam Bonser, Tom Brady and Jake Moody have been stabbed in the back, & Mr. Freeze has been melted to death by what appears to be a Flamethrower all in a matter of seconds. Mr. Fantastic yells “ATTACK!!” then calls out on his walkie talkie “WE NEED AIR SUPPORT NOW!!”. Omniman calls out “THEY HAVE MEN IN THE TREES!!” 

What the Goobers didn’t know is that all 20 Predators had set up positions high into the trees to do night watch, they used their camouflage to avoid being seen.

Avatar Wan and the rest of the Water Benders use the snow to create an ice shield to block ranged attacks from the Goobers. The Goobers charge and the battle begins.

Red Hulk jumps into the trees and goes on a rampage, he kills Predators #11-20, while the rest of the Predators are on the ground and continue their attack. 

Blade cuts the head off of Invisible Woman, even though she’s not a Vampire, his disdain for zombies is equal. Then says “Some mothafuckas always trying to ice skate uphill.” Hancock responds “That doesn’t even make any sense.” As he’s then punched by Red Hulk and flies 100 yards back until the trees finally slow him down. 

The Goobers air support finally arrives and hits the battle with a volley of shots. The Penguin, John & Ted and Vixen are taken out.

Powergirl yells to her team “I’ll take care of the air support.” She flies up and takes out the air support quite quickly. Hits both MiG-29s with her heat vision, she flies through the center of the Twin Pod Bespin Cloud Car, takes out one of the wings of the F-5 and then takes an engine out of Luke Skywalker’s T-16. All pilots die except for Luke Skywalker.

Frozone and Sub-Zero work together and take out the rest of the Predators while the Incredibles join and take out the Blood Benders.

The Fantastic Four attack Blade out of revenge for their fallen undead teammate and though Blade puts up a good fight, it is not enough as The Thing eventually rips him in half. Though Blue Marvel and Franklin Richards join the fight and take out the remaining Fantastic Four members.

Avatar Wan and the rest of the water benders throw spears of ice at Ghost Rider, the engulfed skeleton uses his chain to slash the icicles out of the air and then wraps the OG Avatar and Water Benders with his chain, then engulfing the chain in fire.The Avatar and Water Benders burn to death.

Winter Soldier and Red Hulk team up and they take out Elrond and his Elf companions, then Red Hulk is able to snap Hancock’s neck, and as they start to get their groove Supergirl and Blue Marvel intervene. Supergirl uses her heat vision to melt Winter Soldier’s arm off, then Blue Marvel grabs Winter Soldier and rips him in half. Supergirl then focuses her attention to Red Hulk, he puts up a good fight and is even able to greatly tire and injure Blue Marvel and Supergirl, eventually he was slain. 

Omniman flies and puts in work against Supergirl and Blue Marvel, normally he would be outmanned in this fight but because Red Hulk has injured them, he is able to take them both out.

Highfather and Franklin Richards show great chemistry when taking out the Incredibles and Sub-Zero and then continue their chemistry to take out Ghost Rider as Franklin Richards is able to turn him into a pile of ash using his Energy Construct abilities.

Though their chemistry is short lived as Omniman flies into the back of Franklin Richards and gets on top of him on the ground. Punching Franklin Richards head in until his face is unrecognizable. He then turns his focus to Highfather and attempts to do the same, but is unsuccessful this time as Highfather has the superior strength and bests him. 

Highfather thinks he has won, but his thought is short lived as Luke Skywalker stabs him in the back with his lightsaber.

Luke takes a breather feeling victorious, and begins to set up camp for the night. “I’ll make my way back to town in the morning” he says. 

As he goes to light the campfire a spear flies through his back and is visible in the front. He attempts to yell in pain, but all he can let out is a faint loss of breath as he falls to his death.

Frosty the Snowman woke up late and missed the battle, he saw that Luke was setting up camp and grabbed one of the Predator’s spears and threw it through Luke’s torso.

Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies Vs. The Sigmas

 Brock Sampson's Fighting Murderflies are Ghazan, Avatar Roku, Polar Battle Bear, The Flash, Black Hand, Black Lantern Black Dragon, Adam Warlock, Colossus, Thor, Loki, Red Skull, General Grevious, (Syndicate) Maul, & The Wampa.

The Sigmas are Dante & Randall, Vincent Vega, Marcellus Wallace, Butch, Marcus Brody, Helen of Troy, August Walker, Sarah Conner, Jessie & Meowth, Charmander, Charizard, Dug Trio, Jordan Peterson, Green Day: Billie Joe Armstrong, Mike Dirnt, & Tre Cool, Mark Hamill, MLK Jr., Thomas Jefferson, Benito Mussolini, Aristotle, Andrew Jackson, Alexander Hamilton, Mark "The Bird" Fiddrich, Fred Stathers (w/ a Ray Gun), Neil Patrick Harris, Blaster w/ his Cassettes, Ornn, Oin, Fili, Thrain II, Dori, Dwalin, Roboto, Snout Spout, Whiplash, Modulock, Dean Saglio, Bozo the Clown, Matt Leblanc, & CJ the Dicord Destroyer.