Monday, February 8, 2010

Pop-Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos (Team 1) Vs. TEAM (Team 3)

Pop-Superstar Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama’s “Best of Both Worlds” Touring Battalion of Commandos is Vorian Atreides, Jedi Master #21 & 22, Gungan #1 & 5, & The Map.
TEAM is The Kurgan, Futar #5 & 6, Valkyrie #10 & 11, Tlielaxlu Master #7 & 8, & Animal.
 
Hundreds of Pollock’s go running out of the K of C Hall as the 2 teams are both teleported in to the back of the main hall. They are all positioned in, around, and on top of the tables that have been pushed to this back area, where the 2 teams start battling with each other immediately. The 2 Tlielaxlu Masters both instantly hide under one of the tables and meticulously take pot shots at the their opposition with their wrist bound poison dart shooters. Vorian Atreides takes a step back and takes on a purely leadership role, while The Kurgan’s idea of leadership is to unsheathe his sword and begin swinging wildly with his strike force about 5 steps behind him. Vorian stands on a table to shouts out orders for his squad to remain in a strong defensive posture, which are orders that his teammates execute with perfect precision. The only TEAMmember who jumps into action immediately is Animal. No matter what the orders would have been, had they been given chances are Animal would have disregarded them anyway. The Mad Muppet leaps over to the side of the opposition and begins ripping The Map to shreds. At one point he even takes a bite as if it were a Burger King drink carrier. The Map’s skills were not as easily utilized in a match where the 2 teams are teleported within feet of each other, but he still was an integral part of the team and will be missed. The Kurgan, in his rage lops the head off of Jedi Master #21 as if he was an opponent of no skill whatsoever. He then takes out Gungan #5 on his way to Vorian Atreides, who The Kurgan realizes is the real prize in this match. Vorian pulls out his gun and ceremonial sword, but The Kurgan Knocks these weapons out of Vorian’s hands as if they were toy’s in the hands of a child. The Kurgan then picks up Vorian by the neck and smiles as he slowly plunges his broadsword into the belly of Vorian. “Nooooooooo” yells Gungan #1 as he picks up the lightsaber of his fallen Jedi comrade and ignites it in one fluid motion. The Gungan then jumps into the air and cuts off the head of The Kurgan to kill him the only way that he can be killed. Jedi Master #22 says “Holy crap, tarquwar (that’s Gungan #1’s name) nice work”. To which he replies “Meeesa”? The Jedi Master then takes over leadership roles and yells: “Hey Tarquwar, this battle’s not over yet. Let’s finish these guys”. The 2 lightsaber wielding Commandos rush in with the utmost confidence despite the fact that they are outnumbered over 3 to 1. They rush right past The Tlielaxlu Masters knowing that they are not the cream of the crop of this TEAM. This does not prove to be a problem as the Tlielaxlu fire their last few poison darts at the Commandos, but all of them miss. Once the Tlielaxlu’s darts are gone the 2 of them still do not come out from under the table to help their TEAMmates. Tarquwar, the mad gungan goes rushing in with his new lightsaber and lops off the arm of Futar #5. The Futar knocks down Tarquwar with his other arm, with such force that it probably broke several bones; but the gungan still manages to take the lightsaber and clumsily plunge it into the heart of Futar #5. Futar #6 almost instantly rips the wounded gungan apart, but Tarquwar is revenged by his buddy Jedi Master #22, when the JedI stabs this Futar in the heart as well. The 2 Valkyries then surround the JedI and begin sparring with the Master. They work together as they attack the JedI, but this JedI uses his mastery of the Form 3 technique and goes into a defensive posture. It is not until the JedI sees the 2 Tlielaxlu finally popping out from under the table and Animal leaping down from the ceiling at him that he is thrown off guard. The 2 Valkyries both go in for the kill, but one of them is met with a lightsaber in her neck (#10) and the other one is killed when JedI Master #22’s lightsaber is plunged into her side, right as she is sticking her knife into the Jedi’s neck.
TEAM IS VICTORIOUS!

2 comments:

Ryan said...

Well Ed... It's you and me.

Again.


Let's go!

Lickolas said...

Damn, the Commandos are destined for semi-final defeat.