Better Than All of You vs Pop Superstar Hannah Montana and President Barack Obama's "Best of Both Worlds" Touring Battalion of Commandos

Better Than All of You is N.S.-5 #1-22, Ninja Pirate #3-4, Cobra Viper #1-3, Aquaman, Aqualad, Aquababy, Green Lantern, Abomination, Reptile, Flash (W.W.), Loki & Bartleby.

Pop Superstar Hannah Montana and President Barack Obama’s “Best of Both Worlds” Touring Battalion of Commandos are Dave Bowman, Capt. Tarpals, Jar Jar Binks, Gungan #1-50, The Creature from the Black Lagoon, Darth Binks, The Cloverfield Monster, Seraphina Peckala & her daemon, Black Adam, Parallax, & Bizarro.

Better Than All of You dives into the Atlantic Ocean and awaits their opponents. Aquaman is eager to begin this battle as he feels this is their best chance to finally defeat their rivals, The Commandos. But unbeknownst to them, The Commandos are already there. The Cloverfield Monster erupts from the vast waters and eats Aquababy (the other other white meat…er…fish) and all three Cobra Vipers. Aquaman announces the attack and they all converge on the giant monster. All 22 NS-5’s start climbing and attacking Cloverfield and the parasites that are attached to it. Cloverfield receives some support as Captain Tarpals and Jar Jar Binks lead 50 Gungans into battle. The ocean quickly turns blood red as the fight wages on. Parallax sees Hal Jordan attacking Cloverfield and attempts to once again consume the Green Lantern. However, this time, Hal is prepared for him. He musters all his will power and unleashes a blast of green energy so massive that it lights up the night sky and blinds everyone for a moment as it vaporizes Parallax. The Gungan Army and NS-5’s are fiercely fighting each other in the water as well as on top of Cloverfield. NS-5 #1-4 and 18-22, Gungans #11-16, and 44-50 all perish in the early stages of this fight. Loki and Bartleby fly overhead and shoot Gungans #23, 27, 32, and 38 with their handguns. Bizarro then bursts out of the water after the two angels. He tears Bartleby’s wings off and throws him into the waiting mouth of Cloverfield. He then attacks Loki and removes his wings and just lets him fall back into the water where he is devoured by the Cloverfield parasites. The Creature From the Black Lagoon surfaces and notices that Better Than All of You doesn’t have any women on their team for him to kidnap. But before he can make another move, Abomination grabs a hold of him and crushes the life right out of him. Ninja Pirates #3 and 4 toss their grappling hooks up and start scaling the side of Cloverfield. They stab Gungans #25, 39 and 43 on their way up. Once they are up on top of the monster they are immediately hit in the chest with several arrows that seem to come put of thin air. Flash, doing his best Jesus Christ imitation, comes running in across the water at almost top speeds. Using lightning fast punches, he kills Captain Tarpals, Gungans #3, 6, 9 and does it one more time to #20, 34, and 42. Jar Jar then orders the remaining 24 Gungans to dive deep underwater. The NS-5’s dive in and follow them. This proves to be a fatal move, as though the NS-5’s are stronger than the Gungans, they cannot match the speed and grace of them underwater. It also doesn’t help that Darth Binks is waiting for them. (Yep. It won’t matter how many time you go back and read it; it still says Darth BINKS. So get over it.) He ignites his waterproof lightsaber and goes on a vicious attack that actually makes Jar Jar lose his briskin morning brunchin’. Darth Binks slices his way through all of the remaining NS-5’s as well as Gungans #7, 8, 31, 37, 40 and 41 who were busy fighting the robots. As the Gungans travel back up to the surface, Gungans #1 and 2 are frozen in a block of ice and sink to the bottom. Then Gungan #26 is hit in the back with a spear and gets yanked into the black abyss. The other Gungans manage to reach the water surface, but so has their mysterious attacker. Reptile springs out of the water and spits acid into the faces of Gungans #24, 28 and 33, killing them. He then uses his Sub-Zero like ice blast to freeze the portion of the ocean where the Gungans are swimming. All but Gungans #17-19 are able to jump out of the water in time. Of course though, the second Jar Jar Binks’s feet touch the ice, he starts slipping everywhere. Jar Jar falls into Darth Binks and knocks his lightsaber out of his hands. Green Lantern uses his ring to snatch up the lightsaber and tosses it to the Flash. Reptile then spits an acid net at both Jar Jar and Darth Binks. It ensnares the two Gungans, eating through their flesh, killing them. Green Lantern then creates a giant buzzsaw and starts carving into Cloverfield as Flash races all over him, hacking away with the lightsaber. They both start zipping around the monster at such high speeds that it looks like it’s being wrapped in red and green ribbon. With their combined effort, they actually manage to kill the huge creature, which is now reduced to blood and floating chunks. “Whoa, I gotta get me one of these!” exclaims Flash in reference to the lightsaber. “Wally, you ok? It looks like you got hit,” asks Green Lantern. “Eh, no big deal. One of those spider things just scratched me a bit,” replies Flash as he speeds off. The remaining Gungans jump back into the water away from Reptile. Gungan #10 is stabbed in the back by Aquaman’s trident. Aqualad uses his knife to kill Gungans #21 and 22 as Aquaman overpowers Gungans #29, 30 and 35. Aquaman and Aqualad then make short work of Gungans #4, 5, and 36 as they swim back to the rest of the battle. Black Adam then finally makes his impact felt in the fight. He flies in and uppercuts Abomination into the air and into the waiting arms of Bizarro. He wraps Abomination in a tight bear hug. Abomination pounds his fists against Bizarro’s shoulders, trying to break the hold. Bizarro then uses his freeze vision to freeze Abomination’s head and then headbutts him, shattering it into several pieces. Aqualad is not on top of a dolphin, but is attacked by a half man/half duck looking creature. The creature shockingly snaps Aqualad’s neck with ease. Aquaman then goes berserk and launches a harpoon directly into its face. Then all of a sudden, Seraphina Peckala’s body appears out of nowhere. The creature was her daemon. One cannot survive without the other. The seemingly outnumbered Black Adam and Bizarro are about to charge the remainder of Better Than All of You when Dave Bowman finally makes his appearance. He wipes Reptile form the face of existence (kind of like how Skeletor did to that lizard guy in the Masters of the Universe movie. Remember that?). Now the Justice Leaguers try to figure out what to do. “Um…guys…I don’t…feel…too…cough…good,” moans Flash. “Oh no. Flash, my ring has just detected some sort of odd infection in your blood stream,” replies Hal Jordan. “I’m sorry Wally, but you have to go. I’ve seen this before. You have to swim. Now. As fast as you can. We will continue this battle in your honor,” says Aquaman. Flash takes off, but doesn’t get very far before his body literally explodes. “Well, Arthur. For Wally?” asks Green Lantern. “Aquaman replies, “Aye, friend. For Wally.” Hal leaps out of the water and attacks Dave Bowman, even though he knows that he is on the losing end of this match-up. So he orders his ring to do something drastic. Hal tells it to translate both himself and the Starchild in to a series of electronic impulses that will be stored inside of the ring; a sort of living death. (and since this is a Deathmatch; emphasis on “death”) Aquaman then makes his final stand against the powerhouses of Bizarro and Black Adam. He brings forth an enormous squid and several killer whales. Bizarro goes right after the killer whales and starts attacking them with just brute strength. Aquaman rides upon the squid that wraps its massive tentacles around Black Adam and starts to squeeze. “This is MY domain Teth! Did you really think you could come here and defeat me and my team?!” shouts Aquaman. Black Adam doesn’t respond. Instead he just stares directly into Arthur’s eyes. “Have you nothing to say?!” Aquaman bellows as the squid tightens its grip. “Shazam,” whispers Black Adam. “What was that?” asks Aquaman, who could not hear him over the crashing waves. “SHAZAM! SHAZAM! SHAZAM!” screams Black Adam which send several lightning bolts right through the giant squid and Aquaman.

POP SUPERSTAR HANNAH MONTANA AND PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA’S “BEST OF BOTH WORLDS” TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDOS ARE VICTORIOUS!