Two Hungry Dino-MItes with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. The Striders of Rohan

 **NOTE**  IF YOU HAVE NOT READ PART ONE OF THIS MATCH, READ THAT FIRST.  IT IS POSTED BELOW.  

PART TWO:  PROLOGUE

"What is going on here........??.......  Where am I.....??......  Fili......    Fili....  Is that you"??  Asks Kili after he awakens on a terribly uncomfortable cot with a wicked headache.  

Fili answers:  "Yeah Kili, it's me.We didn't think you were going to make it.  You have been in and out of consciousness for almost two months.   

"Well, where are we??  What part of the Playoff Planet is this anyway??  It doesn't look like anything from the briefings.  The view from out the window looks like the city from Blade Runner".  Kili exclaims.

"What's Blade Runner"??  Asks Fili.

"It's a movie I watched with John Wick and Talon a while back in the clubhouse".  Answers Kili.

Fili looks puzzled:  "What are movies; are those the things on the XM Radio"??  

Kili is getting aggravated:  "NO.  They are the things with the moving pictures on the flat box.  We didn't have them on Middle Earth".

"I mean, we didn't have radio either".  says Fili.

"DAMMIT DWARF, STOP ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS; and tell me what is going on".  Yells Kili.

Fili takes a deep breath and begins to explain:  "Well.....  Here is what we know.  We are not on the Playoff Planet anymore.  We are hiding somewhere on Ranx:  The Sentient City, which is a huge member of the other team.  The Playoff Planet was completely destroyed by Starkiller Base, another huge thing from the other team.  That jerk Darkseid from the Dino-Mites just thought he could destroy the entire planet and win the match.  He transported most of his team here where they had a secret base set up; but right before he could execute the plan, Odin figured it out and used the By-frost to transport us here where we have been hiding ever since.  At the time, he didn't even know where "here" was, he just sensed that that is where Darkseid put all of his folks; so he figured it was the only decent shot.  Which, I guess it was since from what the space dudes on the team tell us, there pretty much is nothing else around for like a billion miles or something and that would put us out of bounds and give us all deaths making The Dino-Mites win.  So, Odin was pretty awesome considering how little time he had to work.  It wasn't perfect though.  We didn't all make it.  Our second Spinosaurus, Talon, Yellow Jacket, Baron Zemo, and some chick named Kimura (shout out Fizz's notes) didn't make it into the By-Frost Portal.  Did I mention that Darkseid was a jerk by the way??  Because he didn't even care that all of his dudes didn't make it out either.  Guess he didn't care since he thought they were about to win the match.  From what our scouts can tell, Invisible Girl and Big Barda didn't make it out either.  

"Wow......  That's a lot to wake up to....  So where is Odin now??  Asks Kili.

"More bad news buddy.  He isn't anywhere.  On the bright side, neither is Darkseid....  Ooh...  That rhymed".  You see, as soon as the big portal transfer happened, Odin told us to take shelter, hide, and regroup; but it all placed Darkseid and Odin toe to toe.  Believe me when I tell you that even though the rest of us was runnin they did be boxin (shout out Crack Franks).  Darkseid looked like he had him beat.  He was screaming about the New Gods; but Odin pulled out his White Ring and started spittin stuff about being the only O.G. god up in here.  There was a huge flash and they were both gone.  We have been hiding and trying to figure out a plan ever since".  You waking up is the most eventful thing that has happened in a while.  It's all just so strange.....  Nothing makes sense....  It feels like we're in some sort of strange story, but the writer switched halfway through.    

Two Hungry Dino-Mites with Bubble Fightin Fun Down Tight Vs. The Striders of Rohan:  PART TWO

After weeks of waiting, it has been established that Mr. Fantastic and Theoden KIng have taken command of their respective teams and that today the battling shall begin.  Game plans have been thrown out the window for the most part as the terrains have all changed, eliminating most of the prep that has taken place for both squads.  Most of the Striders are held up in a large stone building that must be one of the oldest on all of Ranx.  Theoden son of Thengal can only hope that this structure can be defended as well as Helm's Deep has been throughout the reign of his ancestors.  The only Strider who has ignored the leadership of Rohan's KIng is Abeloth, who remains in space where she has plans of her own.  

Reed Richards sees the quality of the plan to hold up in a strategic spot, but has calculated that it is far from impenetrable.  As long as the right plan can be formulated.  Dr. Richards knows that his first wave must consist of physical powerhouses if he is going to gain access to the building.  The first wave of the Dino-Mites is led by The Thing; but also contains Wonder Woman, Desaad, Kalibak, and Steel Superman.  This back-breaking Offensive Line manages to break through the building into the first floor; but are met with a Defensive Line ready to do battle.  The Thing crushes Boromir's skull right off the bat and then very quietly kills Hush; before Roboto uses his goofy looking Eternian gun to blow The Thing into pebbles.  It seems only fitting that Steel, the K-Mart Superman takes on Bat-Wing, the K-Mart Batman.  But since Superman is way more powerful than Batman, Steel Supes obviously wins the fight.  Even though in this case, they are both just regular dudes (shout out Z).  Steel then sees another fake Batman in his midst and sends his big, metal sledgehammer through the cowl of Owlman.  Warpath sees his homies #getwrekt and goes on.....  Well, a warpath against Steel Superman.  Jackin him up like it ain't no thang.  Steppenwolf does what he has wanted to do for centuries and finally knows he can, now that his snot-nosed nephew Darkseid is out of the way.  He straight up brains Kalibak in the dome and then uses his corpse as a weapon to knock Desaad into the middle of next week.  Wonder Woman runs in to help, double clotheslining Roboto and Warpath's heads right off as if it were an after thought on the way there.  Her and Steppenwolf go toe to toe; but it goes down exactly like it was about to in the Justice League Movie if Superman didn't show up to bail out the League.  Steppenwolf takes some serious abuse; but in the end sends his axe directly through the face of Wonder Woman.  Steppenwolf steps out onto the grass in victory; but in his weakened state feels his yellow lantern ring twinge.  He believes it to be a power surge at first; but realizes too late that it is the yellow ring becoming one with the living yellow lantern city he is standing on.  A large hand comes out from the ground and pulls Steppenwolf into the dirt and concrete, consuming him whole.  

Abeloth senses the danger of The Starkiller Base, floating off on its own in space.  She at first considers attempting to trigger it towards Ranx, making she the sole survivor of this battle; but The Force does not show a positive path for such a plan; so she moves on to a better method.  When she left the rest of her team, they had hoped she was going to take on Ranx itself; but Abeloth sensed the true power in Starkiller base and decided that that must be dealt with first.  Ranx would be next.  Much fear she sensed from her team over the power of this base; but in her wisdom she knows that the ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force.  The sole Dino-Mite present, left to operate Starkiller Base by Darkseid is Aquaman (I mean, there is no water left in this match; so what else is he going to do).  Aquaman begins to take aim at Abeloth; but she moves with incalculable speed towards the metallic monstrosity.  A massive Force Tornado is sent from the Mother of Mortis obliterating the Base and Aquaman inside it.  As promised, Abeloth moves away from the destruction with intense devotion to the destruction of that which may rival her in power.  Ranx is warned about the incoming Force Monster by his Qwardian Core; but it is not enough to stop the approaching danger.  Abeloth begins to suck the power right out of the very planet that both teams are residing on.  The Mother of Mortis is successful in her mission; but is unaware of the raw fear she would ingest by sucking in this power.  The fear of a thousand dead souls stolen by The Yellow Lantern Core and the Parallax Power.  So much fear.....  Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering....  Such an intense suffering that Abeloth cannot handle it, she will not handle it, and therefore chooses to join her victim in death rather than allow her self-suffering to continue.  The suffering was so bad that it was almost as terrible as what Kyle experienced after failing to eat The Big Benito.

The Sentient City erupts into a massive earthquake sending every member of both teams tumbling about as the life drains from Ranx leaving simply a dead rock to inhabit for the remainder of the battle.  

Before Richards can set up his next wave, Theoden goes on the offensive for once.  He has several creatures that do not quite fit in his building; so he sends them out as a Defensive attack.  King Kong and the Spinosaurs' leap off of the top of the giant building, while The Leader, due to his extreme intellect is sent out in a vain attempt to control them.  The large brained Hulk villain is flanked by Maximus and Hellboy serving as his own personal bodyguards.  These bruisers are quickly met by a strike force led by the nearly full spectrum Aang and also containing The Flash and Booster Gold.  Wedge with his Wingman Zam Wessel also approach for air support in a pair of X-Wings.  Aang takes flight and engages Ancalagon head on in the skies as a pitched battle commences (shout out Becks).  The Leader is like totally Hella-Smart, I mean this cat is a straight up genius; but just like real life, when the smart guy fights the tough guy; don't bet on the smart guy.  Booster Gold proves this by blasting The Leader's head off with a single energy shot.  Speaking of knocking head's off, that is exactly what The Flash does to the Zombie Spinosaurus with the second hardest punch in the DC Universe.  The Flash then races towards Hell Boy and vibrates directly through his demonic body; but is surprisingly caught off guard with the steel blade of Maximus separating Barry Allen's head from his neck right as he regains his solid state.  Booster Gold gets revenge for his Homeboy Flash by blasting the Gladiator; but Ancalagon diverts his attention away from Aang long enough to bite Booster Gold in half.  Wedge and Zam swoop down and run a strafing run on Spinosaurus 1A and Vampire Spiny; but Zam is knocked out of the sky by King Kong before she can regroup with Wedge.  Wedge gets set up for a solo attack run; but receives orders from Mr. Fantastic to bug out.  Reed knows what is coming next as Aang uses his lantern rings to form an impenetrable defense while he goes fully into the Avatar State.  Aang loses control of his body in the natural state while he goes full Avatar.  A flurry of lights shine through the sky, before he comes back to the natural world falling to the ground in a complete state of unconsciousness.  Which is still better than the fate of Kong and Ancalagon who are destroyed completely by this nearly impossible to tap power.  

THE LAST ACT:

What is left of what was once Ranx is left in fiery ruin as the last surviving members of both squads stroll out to the tattered ground that will have to pass as a battlefield.  Mr. Fantastic leaves behind his behind the scenes leadership position and joins the fray head on.  He is quickly met by the fangs of Michael Corvin who complains about the chewiness of Reed Richards as he sends him to join his wife in the graveyard.  Link, much more experienced with the undead leaps in with his green energy laced Master Sword to take on Michael Corvin in a pitched battle and hopefully avenge his squad's leader.  Human Torch isn't too happy to see his brother in law get eaten, so he takes out the other side's leader in revenge, burning Theoden to a crisp.  Barry Sanders, sees how Wonder Girl is dressed and assumes she is a stripper; so he runs at her as fast as his Vibranium Suit will allow.  Sanders, always fast on his feat and quick with his wits realizes his mistake and quickly goes back into attack mode, clawing Wonder Girl across the jugular.  Wedge flies in low to begin his attack run; but Winter Soldier uses his super cool arm to target Wedge's X-Wing and take it out of the sky.  Antilles barely ejects in time.  Ant Man and Wasp are about to do something wicked awesome to be showcased in their final deaths; but instead they accidently get stepped on by our former narrators Fili and Kili.  The two dwarves high five and jump for joy in excitement; but lose control, accidently slipping and falling face first into their own axes.  Alan Trammell is joyfully reminded of his time working with Mike Illitch and many of the Red Wings in Illitch's cloning lab back in the day when he sees Falcon and his winged sidekick.  Falcon swoops in fast at Tram; but the Tigers Hall of Famer swings for the fences aiming for Falcon's head, sending it LOOOOOOONG Gone.  But Falcon's falcon zips by Tram like the house by the side of the road and digs its talons into the back of Trammell's dome.  There aren't enough random henchmen in this match for John Wick to kill for him to really showcase his talents; but he does put up quite a fight against Daredevil.  If it weren't for Matt Murdock's acquisition of two new lightsabers, Wick may have ended up on top; but Daredevil takes the fight and relieves Wick of his head.  Zombie Wolverine rushes in, less than a second after Wick's demise and skewers Daredevil.  Capt. Marvel zips down to the ground at breakneck speed and says something really woke; but I missed it because I am part of the patriarchy who believes women should be seen and not heard.  Scorpion yells:  "GET OVER HERE"; but Captain Definitely Not DC reminds him that he isn't even that Scorpion, he is the one from Marvel.  She makes sure he dies for not understanding his own identity.  Captain Marvel then begins dying on the inside after becoming terribly offended when Wolverine begins fighting her and doesn't refer to her as "Bub".  She assumes that this is because he is sexist and he is not saying his famous tagline because he has assumed her gender as female.  It's really because he is a zombie and he doesn't know how to talk anymore.  Either way, Capt. Marvel rips both Zombie Wolvie and his Zombie daughter to bloody, Zombie pieces before she dies from feigned emotional violence.  Her last act as a living being is to throw the dead, bloody body parts several Universes over to the nearest Republican convention where the people are covered in blood, guts, and innards.  Don't worry, they deserved it for being racist.  

THE LAST ACT:  PART TWO

Aang reawakens for a moment in a weakened state; but is able to save his friend Wedge from being finished off by the Winter Soldier with a massive blast of green lantern energy aimed at Bucky.  Link and Michael Corvin have battled with each other to exhaustion, when Corvin knocks the Master Sword from the hands of link and rips the Hylian Shield right out of the hero of Hyrule's hands.  Corvin smirks at the green garbed warrior; but Link backflips away from the scene just as Corvin looks down at the shield in his hands and notices the two bombs placed on top of it.  Corvin blows to pieces.  

Barry Sanders fights valiantly, holding his own against Human Torch, against all odds.  Despite Johnny's intense power; Sanders is able to deflect, dodge, and power through his attacks.  In typical fashion for a team sport; Barry Sanders does not allow himself to be retired until he realizes he has no team to back him up.....