Season 9: Week 3: Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets -vs- Beckerman’s Backyardigan Beeyaatches

Traveling Sisterhood of Evil Midgets are: Ariella Kent, Luminara Unduli w/White Lantern Ring, Magneto w/Bell X-2, (Original) Duncan Idaho w/Orange Lightsaber, Allia Atreides/St. Allia of the Knife (w/Ventress 2 Red Lightsabers), He-Man, Murbella, The Tardis with Thurfir Hawat, Princess Irulan & Hiih Resser inside, Soundwave w/Rumble, Frenzy, Ravage, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw, Ratbat, Overkill, Slugfest, Squawktalk, Beastbox, Enemy, Wingthing, Flip sides, Sundor, Garboid, Howlback, Glit, Decepticon Cassette #1-3, Ravage Clone #1-3, Decibel, Legout, Nightstalker, Playback, Rosanna, Stripes, Autoscout #1 & 2, Autobot Cassette #1-3 and Decepticon #7, Castor & Pollex (both w/Blue Lightsaber pikes), Bizarro Mr. Mxytplk (w/Indigo Lantern Ring), Impossible Man, Mighty Mousette (w/Star Sapphire Lantern Ring), Troll #1, Griffin #11, Dragon #1, Pony #1 & 2, Samurai #20, Ice Bros. #2-6, Jedi Guardian #4, Jedi Master #33A-35A & 17B-20B, Nightsister #2 & 7, Dark side Adept #1-3, Ewok #41-45, Hammer Bros. #41-45, Hammer Bros. #11-16 & Gold Dragon #3-7.

Beckerman’s Backyardigan Beeyaatches are: Black Lantern Magog, White Lantern Kyle Raynor w/full spectrum, Beta Ray Bill, Grey Hulk, Black Lantern Mephisto, Black Lantern Terrax, Zombie Surtur, Malhedron, Uggha, Lightray, Shadowfall, Bekka, Hyalt, Terminator #1-25 & Predators #19-44.

“I don’t like ice. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Then it turns to water and gets everything soggy. Look Master, it’s like I wet myself.”

-Anakin Skywalker, on his first trip to Hoth.

The Tardis appeared in a remote area of the ice planet Hoth, only to be blown up by all six New Gods on the Backyardigans. Lightray looked over at Hyalt and said, “Like I said, tricky contraptions those boxes are. Future and past always appear to be the same thing.” The New Gods then disappear together, leaving nothing but silence and bitter cold.

The normally harsh yet quiet terrain of Hoth was thick with noise on this day; the final day of this regions stability. Unlike most planets, the first destructive force came in the form of robots, though their destruction of each other was minimal compared to the damage they did to the landscape. What were once hilly, ice covered glaciers, were now nothing more then cratered chunks of ice floating on a less then frozen ocean. The Terminators and Predators battled with Soundwave and his numerous tapes, a battle that took its immediate toll, leaving only a wingless Laserbeak left as the sole survivor. Lazerbeak attempted to crawl to safety but in his very short travels, he fell into the freezing Hoth waters, ending his cowardly life for good.

BL Mephisto: Everyone always assumes hell will be hot, for today at least, the Midgets will freeze.

Impossible Man: They sure will.

BL Mephisto: You do know you are not on my team?

Impossible Man: I’m not an idiot Mephisto. Though, you are.

Impossible Man then grows ten times his size and stomps on BL Mephisto, laughing at his own triumph. As Impy laughs and moves his foot around, he feels warmth underneath his foot, warmth that quickly turns into a burn.

Impossible Man: Athlete’s foot again, Tinactin is tough acting my foot. Like my literal foot, cause it’s burning right now.

Before Impy is able to move his foot, it is blown clear off by the Black Lantern ring attached to Mephisto’s right hand. The several hundred foot tall Impossible Man is unable to shrink his size before he loses his balance, sending him crashing down into the frozen Hoth earth. Ice and snow chunks fly up in the air, covering everything within a half mile radius, killing many in the process. Ewoks, pony’s, samurai, four gold dragons and a troll are all killed in the avalanche. Impossible Man is finally able to shrink back down to size but not before Mephisto puts him out of his misery.

BL Mephisto: Like I said, a cold day in hell.

Impossible Man is blown clear out of this existence, among many others. BL Mephisto then took off in the air to join the rest of his team.

A half mile away, Castor was fighting back to back with Pollex, trying their best to fight off the Black Lantern Duo of Magog and Terrax. The Dioskouri, though noble in their efforts, were no match to the power of the darkness that surrounded their opponents. BL Terrax blew a hole right in the middle of Castor’s chest and Magog stabbed Pollux through the eye with his staff.

Both Black Lanterns stood in triumph over their over-matched opponents, bragging to each other about their greatness. BL Mephisto saw his teammates victory from up above but was not quick enough to save them from the blindness their braggadocious nature shielded them from seeing. Magneto, accompanied with the power of Luminara Unduli’s White Lantern Ring, sent the Bell X-2 jet right through the chests of both Terrax and Magog. Both Black Lantern wearing Backyardigan members were torn right in half.

Suddenly, the ground began to shake with increasing intensity. Luminara Unduli slowly turned around to see a wall of white barreling toward him with the sound of a thousand freight trains. Magneto was frozen in horror and he could barely make out what Unduli said.

Luminara Unduli: RUNNNNNNN!!!!!

Magneto and Unduli quickly began running on the frozen tundra as the Grey Hulk came barreling toward them with both Shadowfall and Bekka directly behind them. Unduli them grabbed Magneto and shielded them both in a glow of white light, blinding the three oncoming Backyardigans members. Though the Hulk and two new gods were unable to make any headway towards their opponents, the white lantern shield quickly dissipated and soon enough, Magneto & Unduli were once again open to attack.

Unduli looked down at her White Lantern ring, a ring once full of life, now just an empty ring on her finger.

Full Spectrum Kyle Raynor: Thanks for the power Luminara. Now Hulk, Smash.

Grey Hulk picked both Magneto and Unduli up and began beating their heads together until the ground underneath him was a bloody, brain soaked mess. Hulk stood over the dead bodies, proud of the death he was at fault for. The New Gods stood around him in protection, awaiting another battle. Black Lantern Mephisto caught up to Kyle Raynor who was floating above the Hulk, watching as the remaining hoard of commons were heading straight towards them. One by one, Hammer brothers, Ice Brothers, Griffin’s, and Dragons came their way, only to be destroyed each and every time.

Next came the force sensitive common members. Though the fight was more difficult, the outcome was the exact same. One by one again, all the Jedi Masters, Night Sisters and Dark Side Adepts fell at the hands and energy blasts of the Backyardigans.

Allia Atreides was standing on a hill side nearby with the remaining members of her team, knowing that her team was no match for the remaining Backyardigan members that she faced. Not one to give up though, she asked every single member of her team to enter the Tardis, telling them to leave this place until one week’s time had passed. She met resistance from many of her teammates, especially Ariella Kent who insisted on staying behind to help. Allia understood where the young Kryptonian was coming from but explained to her that she was going to be needed when they came back. In the end, they understood her plan and followed her orders. The Tardis then disappeared, leaving everyone but her behind.

Allia then used every ounce of her powers, infecting Kyle Raynor, Black Lantern Mephisto and Beta Ray Bill, convincing them all to attack their own teammates. Mephisto and Beta Ray Bill immediately attacked Grey Hulk and Zombie Surtur. Mephisto sent a blast of black energy into Hulk, disintegrating him before he realized what even occurred. At the same time, Beta Ray Bill used Stormbreaker as a means to relieve Surtur of his head, Barry Bonds style.

After realizing what had occurred, Kyle Raynor screamed at Bekka and Shadowfall to leave this place at once and join their breathern, before doing what he knew he had to do in order to stop the Abomination of Allia Atreides. Once the New Gods had left this plain of existence, Kyle Raynor unleashed the full power of the color spectrum, leveling the entire planet of Hoth to nothing but a thin layer of freshly fallen snow. The planet wide blast, destroyed everything form of life on the planet, leaving it once more a peaceful bitterly cold world.

One Week Later…

The still frozen world lay in silence as the New Gods once more appeared, awaiting the arrival of the Tardis. After several hours of nothing, Hyalt turned to Lightray in confusion and said, “Do you think they are lost?” Lightray laughed and replied, “Tricky contraptions those boxes are. Future and past always appear to be the same thing.”

Hyalt looked back at Lightray wondering what was meant by the comment but before figuring it out, Lightray responded again with, “Follow my lead, I suspect I know where they went.”