The Empire Vs. Hannah Montana and Barack Obama's Best of Both Worlds Touring Battalion of Commandos

The Empire is: Colossus, Lara Croft (w/ a purple lightsaber), Sabertooth, , Black Zero, Steel Superman, Lady Deadpool, Kidpool, Headpool, Dogpool, Kid Deadpool (w/ a Sith Lavarouk), Kaja Sinis, Black Lantern Abin Sur, Vladimir Putin (w/ yellow lantern ring), Hannibal King, Kim Jong Un, Mewtoo (w/ a red lightsaber), Superman Becks, Gorax, The Revanchist (w/ a blue lightsaber), Kyle Rayner, Daredevil (w/ a mithril vest and a green lightsaber), Jedi Master #40, Nightbrother #7-8, Acklay #3, Force Adept #6, Krayt Dragon #4, Neo Cymek #19, Brass Dragon #10, Copper Dragon #1-6, Rohirim #2-6, Dementor #6 & 9, Terminator #38, Decepticon Decoy #1-5, Watchdog #2, 5-10.

The Commandos are: Iorek Byrninson, Lyra Belacqua w/ Pantalamion, Will Perry w/ Kirjava, Olivia Moore, Clairy Fraye, Dora, Boots, Backpack, The Map, The Mikaelson Family, Hannah Montana, Ewok Child #9, Human Bomb, Dark Phoenix, Zombie Nichol Valdez, Thanos, Sin Eater, Foolkiller, Equnox, Grimlock Rex Prime, Gungan #49-50, The 2002 Detroit Red Wings, Boil Over Becks, Doozer #9, Queen Xenomorph #9-10, Wookie Soldier #26-30, Atreides Soldier #19-20, Minotaur #6-10, Dilaphosaur #26-30, Allosaurus #26-30, Samurai #36-40.

A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR FAR AWAY....

It is a dark time for The Commandos. Although Putin was defeated, The Premier's Imperial Troops have driven The Commandos forces from their hidden base and pursued them across the Galaxy.

Evading the dreaded Imperial Starfleet, a group of freedom fighters led by Dora the Explorer has established a new secret base on the remote ice world of Hoth.

The evil Lord Putin, obsessed with finding young Dora, has dispatched thousands of remote probe droids into the far reaches of space..........


ON THE SURFACE OF HOTH


“Echo three to Echo seven, Lidstrom old buddy, you read me”??

“Loud and clear Chelios. I see no signs of anything. I was about to head back to base”

“There was a meteor that hit ground back here, I was going to go check it out”.

“Chris, there isn't enough life on this planet to fill Joe Louis Arena”.

“Ha, I hear ya Nick. I'll be back to base soon”.


ON THE OFFWORLD BASE OF THE EMPIRE

“Premier Putin, what an honor to be in your presence, sir”

“Dispense with the pleasantries Private Superman Becks. Now tell me, what are your findings”??

“Very little to report I'm afraid sir. One of our probe droids was hit by a hockey stick down on Hoth; but I am sure it is nothing”.

“THAT IS THEM Superman Becks, NOW ready the fleet”.

“But Premier Putin. It could be anything. It could be Canadians, or Swedes, or even friends of Ninja Turtles”??

“You are wrong private. It is them, and Dora is with them. GENERAL KIM JONG”!!

“Yes Premier”.

“Ready your troops. And make way for the Hoth system”.

THE COMMANDO HOTH OUTPOST

“Echo three, this is Echo Base.... Repeat..... Echo three, this is Commander Hannah Montana, from Echo Base. Do you read me. Lt. Chelios, DO YOU READ ME”??

“I read ya now Echo Base. All I did was hit that probe droid with my hockey stick and it blew up. It must have been some sissie droid from Colorado”.

“Well, Grimlock and Martian Manhunter are interpretting the signal as an Imperial one. You better get back to base”.

THE COMLINK IS INTERUPTED

“Echo Base, this is General Bowman. We should begin full evacuation”.
“I agree, General Bowman. It's a good bet The Empire knows we're here. Montana out”.


THE EMPIRE LANDS JUST OUTSIDE ECHO BASE.

“KYLE RAYNER, The Commandos already seem to be evacuating”.

“Well, yes Premier Putin, they are”.

“Superman Becks came out of lightspeed too close to the settlement”.

“Well, Premier, he thought surprise was......... (trailing off).....

“Superman Becks is as clumsy as he is stupid” says Putin. “BRING HIM TO ME”.

SUPERMAN BECKS IS SEEN BEING DRAGGED OUT OF THE ROOM BY KIDPOOL AND KID DEADPOOL.

“Apology accepted Superman Becks” says Putin.

ON THE GROUND, HALF A MILE FROM ECHO BASE.

“Colonel Saybatooth, this es General Kim Jong. Remember that I row your thoughts. I row what your” heart intends, I row whether you right raliantly. For I am your Supreme Leader. Now take all expendable troops and bring them to battle first. Attack Recho Rase for the grory of the combined Empire Of Russia and Unified Korea”.

ECHO BASE.

“Capt. Lidstrom, this is General Bowman. Get what troops you can together and prepare for a ground assault”.

“Three lines against an army, Capt. Lidstrom?? That's impossible”. Says Sgt. Draper, speaking for the whole team.

The brave Capt. Lidstrom replies: “Grimlock Prime and Thanos will fire several shots to back us up. , We need to make sure that all of the television and young adult book stars that are bogging down are team can get to safety. We have a job to do Red Wings, now let's get to it”.

“Look it's THE EMPIRE”!! Shouts Capt. Obvious, I mean Corporal Robataille.

THE BATTLE BEGINS...

General Jong Un remains at the rear while Sabertooth leads the ragtag group of battle-hardened Imperials towards Echo Base.

Sabertooth, the Deadpool Corps, Hannibal King, who looks like he should be in the Deadpool Corps; but is not, the Dementors, terminators Decepticon decoys, and several others (but not the warm blooded Krayt Dragon, who of course died the second it got off the ship on Hoth) mow through the once strong Red Wing defense, their extra gungans Queen Xenomorphs, Wookies, soldiers, dinosaurs, samurai, and several other key players such as Doozer #9, his boyfriend Boil Over Becks, Foolkiller, Equinox, Sin Eater, Boil Over Becks ex-boyfriend: Ewok Child #9, and the two zombies Nichol and Olivia Moore, who are having a totally normal CW-like love affair even though they have both always been straight before today.

As The Empire enters the base, The Commandos scramble to attempt to get to safety; but they do valiantly fight back. The Empire also finds that the defenses of the base are significantly more advanced than they realized and casualties are high on their side as well. In fact, the entire advance squad, that General Jong Un sent in has been killed, making the elite rear guard of The Imperial forces join the ground assault.

Dora and Boots come rushing down into the control room, when.......
“IMPERIAL TROOPS HAVE ENTERED THE BASE. IMPERIAL TROOPS HAVE ENTERED THE BASE” Starts booming through the loudspeakers of the control station.

“Commander Montana, we need to get you to your ship”. Yells Dora.

Hannah retorts: “I'll be fine Dora, you got your clearance to leave”.

“We'll leave, but you're the namesake of this team, and first I'm going to get you out of here”

“I'll be fine. Besides, Obama's term is almost up. And then your as good as gone anyway”. Just get out of here”. Says Montana.

“This is about the way you feel about me isn't Miley”?? Says Dora.

Hannah gets sheepish and says: “Well, I mean yes. Of course. You're a natural leader. We need you”

“We need, more like you need”.....

Hannah moves towards Dora, when they are interrupted by the comlink and forced back into a mode of all business.....

“Commander Montana, Commander Montana, anybody, ANYBODY. If anybody can hear this.... This is Katy Grimlock-Perry. I'm on the back of my husband and things are getting really bad. The battle is lost, repeat the battle is lost”.

“Hold tight Katy, we're coming with reinforcements”. Yells Dora.

Katy comes back over the crackling and failing communicator: “NO, DON”T. The battle is lost. You can't help us. We took out Steel Superman and Colossus,Daredevil, Black Zero, Kaja Sinis, Kyle Rayner, even General Jong Un himself; but we lost Thanos, Manhunter, Human Bomb, and we just lost Dark Phoenix!! She went nuts and it blew the reactor core when she did!! The whole Mikaelson family and Clairy are trapped inside. WE'RE DONE, GAME OVER GIRLS.... GET OUT OF HERE IF YOU STILL CAAAAHHH......

THE COMLINK GOES DEAD.......

“Boots, this is Dora. Ready the ship for takeoff. Hannah and I are coming to you”.

“Dora, don't come..... its.... a...... trap...... ship... is... down..... I've been shot.... Backpack, Map.... all gone. Dora........ It.... was... Putin..........”............

“BOOTS”!!!! Screams Dora.

THE COMLINK GOES DEAD AGAIN....

Miley is shaking when she says: “Dora, don't let them take us. I know too much. If I crack under torture, Putin will know all our secrets. I can't let them take me no matter what”.

Dora and Miley run as fast as they can away from the base when they find themselves by a iced over cliff outside the base. With no place to go, Putin, aided by his yellow ring flies in.

“Dora, we need to talk. I know that when we worked together before that your loyalty to Obama has waivered. I know it wasn't all a sham”

Miley looks at Dora, like it can't possibly be true, while Putin continues.

“Join me Dora. You can be my right hand. We could rule the league. I won't hurt Hannah Montana. We just need her information. And we need you. The battle is won for our side. There is nothing you can do. I'm sorry about Boots. My men were just defending themselves. But we don't need further loss of life. Now, Dora........ Come with me.... It is the only way”.......

Putin puts out his hand to help Dora and Hannah down from the cliff, certain that she will come. Even Hannah understands that surrender is the only logical way out. Hannah takes a step in Putin's direction, when Dora grabs her hand.

Hannah turns to Dora and says: “I love you”.....

But Dora pulls out her pistol and says: “I know”.

Putin puts up a yellow aura to protect himself from potential bullets, when Dora points the gun at Hannah's head, pulls the trigger, and then defiantly looks over at Putin as she throws herself off the cliff.