Logical Genocide Vs. George Washington's Slaves

Logical Genocide is Zombie General Zod, Golden Army Soldier #19-23, Guy Gardner (w/ a blue lantern ring), Black Lantern Bryan Beckerman, Ewok #74 (AKA Jug Juggalo).

George Washington's Slaves are Ymir, Paul Bunyan and Babe, Shindor of Brontic, Santa Claus (w/ green and blue lightsabers (the latter used to belong to Ki Adi Mundi), Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Tim Cheveldae (w/ a sack of gungan boombas), Paul Coffey (w/ a green lightsaber), Bryan Murray (w/ a green lightsaber), Steve Yzerman (w/ Darth Nihilus' red lightsaber), and Tomar Tu.


Before the match begins Slaves Head Coach George Washington himself, personally approaches Santa Claus. “Santa, you don't have to do this ya know, it is early in the season. We have a formidable team without you this week. We are rolling out our first round draft pick Ymir, I mean you have seen this guy right? The huge frost giant! I just don't want to lose you and Rudolph. I know that we are fighting in your home of the North Poll, and it is important to you but..... (trailing off)... It's just that... I know how upset you have been since the loss of Corbin, not to mention your other eight reindeer... And... You have been such an important part of this team since day one, and the truth is that there is a good chance that if you go in to this match, that you may never come back”. “I don't intend to”. Santa replies... “I don't intend to”.

These words hang in the back of Gen. Washington's head as he watches his squad depart for the frozen tundra known as The North Poll.

Rudolph is nice and bulked up from an off-season of pulling a sleigh all by himself, not to mention the fact that there was enough reindeer food stockpiled in the Slaves' Headquarters to feed nine deer, not just himself. This is the reason, that Santa (who looks like he is fat and ready for Christmas Eve) is able to ride on the back of the red-nosed reindeer. The two of them take to the skies and fly high, just daring Logical Genocide to come and get the jolly old saint. Zombie General Zod takes off to search for Kris Kringle, but we will return to this pending battle soon enough.

Back down on the frozen ground, The five Golden Army Soldiers are logically chosen for the first wave of genocide against The Slaves. Bryan Murray rushes in first but realizes the hard way that The Golden Army Soldiers are just as tough as they look. The lightsaber wielding general manager (I still don't think of him as a coach) gets quickly crushed by the members of the Golden Army. Tim Cheveldae rushes in next, as ordered; but keeps his distance. He thinks back to the night before when Gen. Washington was giving him his instructions on what to do. Chev's initial response to the orders was: “But, Meesa no have a boomba”. “Here... Take um this one”!! The father of our country said to Tim as he handed him a sack of Gungan Boombas. Tim to the Timmy keeps this in mind as he begins clearing the boombas into The Golden Army's direction with his Goalie Stick. The Boombas work exceptionally well at slowing down The Golden Army, which is more than The Slaves require to work out step two of their plan. Ymir leads the charge as he crushes the stunned Golden Army Soldier #21 with all of his might. Paul Bunyan and Babe follow suit by taking out #19 and 22. Guy Gardner, Black Lantern Bryan Beckerman, and the clown make-up covered Jug Juggalo the Ewok attempt to act as a diversion against the giant slaves. This actually works to buy some time for the boomba-affected Golden Army Soldiers to regain their composure. And regain their composure they do as the two remaining mechanical soldiers attack Paul Bunyan and Babe from behind and rip them apart. Timothy Chevmeister begins to rush back to use his last few boombas but before he can Ymir demolishes Soldier #20, while Shindor of Brontic uses his lightsaber and Dark Jedi Powers to slice and dice Soldier #23 far beyond their ability to repair themselves. Zombie General Zod finally finds Santa within the cold North Poll Clouds, while Paul Coffey is using his green lightsaber, which he has attached to the end of his hockey stick to slash Jug Juggalo to death. Zombie General Zod rushes at Santa, with all the speed of a living Kryptonian, but Rudolph is able to evade him. Rudolph loops back around and begins to charge toward Zod in a strange game of mid-air chicken as they get closer, Santa ignites his two lightsabers, which flashes to many memories of his old-friends Ki Adi Mundi and Corbin Dallas. Santa waits until the last possible second to swing his lightsabers. With the aid of the Jedi Weapons, and a little Christmas Magic, St. Nicholas is able to remove the head of The Zombie Kryptonian General. “Ohhhh SNAP” Tomar Tu says as Zod's rotting head falls about two feet in front of him. The two Christmas Icons then fly back down toward the ground. “Let's finish this thing” Santa says to his old friend in that overly-dramatic dual meaning kind of way. Santa and Rudolph crash directly in to Guy Gardner whose Blue Ring's aura protects him from to much bodily harm, not that it keeps him from being knocked backward. “Well, I guess this blue ring is totally useless” Gardner says as he pulls out his two long-barreled revolvers. Guy Gardner then unloads both of his Magnum Revolvers in Santa and Rudolph's direction. Rudolph acts quickly by lunging up his chest and throwing Santa off of his back. Saving the life of his old friend by taking the brunt of the attack for himself. Seeing the bloody body of his last Reindeer sends Santa in to a rage. He ignites his lightsabers once again and yells “Step aside Slaves”!! as he decides that he will finish this match on his own. His teammates all listen out of respect as Santa and Guy Gardner's face prove that men chosen by the green lantern corps can most definitely contain fear. Santa makes quick work of Gardner by slicing him in to quarters with his blue and green lightsabers. A frown appears on Santa's face as he looks around to see only his own teammates. He shutters to think for a second, that he may have actually survived yet another one of these God-forsaken matches when he feels a sudden nagging at his heart... Literally... “I never did believe in Santa Claus”!! Black Lantern Bryan Beckerman says as he rips out Kris Kringle's heart with his teeth. A scream of “NOOOOO” from the remaining Slaves is heard for miles in the echoing open tundra, that comes from all but the quick acting Steve Yzerman. The Captain ignites his red lightsaber, and rushes towards the Black Lantern Lawyer. Red Lightsabers, are reserved for Sith Lords, and not Jedis due to the fact that during their design the unstable nature of the red crystals require the use of the force to fuel their binding power to the weapon itself; thus using the force to attack. This residual bit of power never quite vacates the weapon, regardless of who wields it. So, when Steve Yzerman; an icon for all that is good about sportsmanship and charity and the embodiment of The Spirit of Detroit swings this weapon towards Black Lantern Becks, he is easily able to kill what is already dead.
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S SLAVES ARE VICTORIOUS!!