Season Five: Week 7: The Horsemen of Apokolips vs Logical Genocide

Horsemen of Apokolips are Phoenix - Jean Grey, Flamebird (Supergirl), Nightwing (Power Girl), Joseph (Magneto Clone), Sebastian Shaw, Freddy Krueger w/Yellow Lantern Ring, Battle Pope w/M134 Minigun, Gozar the Gozarian w/Zuul & Vince Clortho, The Destroyer, Vampire Achilles (w/his original sword, sheild and armor),

Glory, Amazon #2, Raiden, Kid Thunder, Black Lantern Mike Sroka, Pete Sosa: Dark Jedi, Julie Artrip possessed by Red Lantern Entity "The Butcher" w/Green Lightsaber, Chris Artrip w/Green Lightsaber, Mandalorian Armor in the Pimpmobile,

Josh Houslander, Jedi Master w/Blue Lantern Ring, Laya Houslander, Jedi Padawan, Alex Houslander, Jedi Padawan

Logical Genocide is The Royal Flush Gang (Ten, Jack, Queen, King, and Ace)

Gandalf the Grey and Shadowfax\, Wizard Nick Houslander, Merlin, Han Solo: Rogue Jedi flying the Starship Casino, Pokerface, Sith Lord Mike Sroka, Black Lantern Brian Beckerman, Centerion #8 (Sue Yerazzov), Centerion #4 (Jim Tebow)

Cosmic Spider-Man, 5 Golden Army soldiers (#41-45), Aro, Caius, and Marcus,

Nadira, Plastic Baby, Centerion #1 (Harold "Hot Fudge Harry" McTwivent)

"Jack Pot Mother F@$%ers" is all you can hear from the Luxor Casino in Las Vegas as every single member of both teams are some how cleaning up in the pyramid shaped casino. Well, not quite everyone...

On Board the Starship Casino 

Pokerface: How come nobody wants to ever play in my casino?

Han Solo: Maybe it's because up here the house always wins, no exceptions.

Wizard Nick Houslander: I wish that were true.

Han Solo: Oh god, here we go again.

Wizard Nick Houslander: What? Just because I never win here doesn't mean you have to be a prick about it.

Pokerface: I'm pretty sure he wasn't talking about you when he was talking about the house.

Han Solo: No, of course I wasn't. The house, as in the casino.

Wizard Nick Houslander: Oh sooorrrryyyyy for misunderstanding you. I didn't mean to offend you, oh great and powerful Jedi.

Han Solo: Jesus Christ (Under his breathe) Look kid, I'm sorry you never win here but there's no need to always internalize everything you hear.

Wizard Nick Houslander: Shut up, that's not it. It's just that...(begins to stumble over his words).

Pokerface: Oh god.

Han Solo: Here comes the water works.

Wizard Nick Houslander: F@#$ you guys.

Pokerface: God, I didn't realize it was that time of the month.

Wizard Nick Houslander: Shut up, the male period is a real thing.

Han Solo: Okay and with that I am out of here.

Han Solo leaves the room that Wizard Nick Houslander is in and heads back towards the front of the ship.

Pokerface: Hey wait up.

Pokerface runs towards the rogue Jedi and starts to walk with him.

Pokerface: Wow, that was awkward.

Han Solo: Always is with that kid. Ever since he put on that pathetic excuse for a Clint Eastwood costume and got all those magic powers he hasn't been the same person. He used to be able to maim and kill with the best of them.

Pokerface: Didn't he just rape some chick a couple of weeks ago?

Han Solo: Ah, I don't think so. I think you have him confused with someone else.

Pokerface: Oh yeah, I must. Hey, when the hell are you going to let me have my ship back?

Han Solo: Your ship? I won her from you fair and square. You want her back, you gotta win her back and the last time I checked I wasn't willing to part with her so easily.

Pokerface: How about we go five-card stud for it?

Han Solo: How about no.

Pokerface: Well I want her back.

Han Solo: How about this. Come up with a way for us to win this match and I'll consider giving her back to you.

Pokerface: ...

Han Solo: Yeah, I thought so. Good luck though, keep on trying.

Pokerface just stands by as Han Solo continues to walk down the corridor towards wherever it was that he was headed to.

Back down at the Luxor

"What are you nuts?” a very interested Nadira says to Ace as he tells the dealer to hit him with two tens sitting in front him on the table.

Ace: Trust me, I'm feeling lucky.

The dealer looks at Ace like he is nuts but after he throws down the ace of hearts, a huge smile pours over his face.

Nadira: Oh my god baby, you are amazing!!!

Nadira then gives Ace a huge hug and a kiss before hearing her phone go off again for the third time in as many minutes.

Ace: Who the hell keeps calling you during a match?

Nadira: Who else, Favre.

Ace: Why the hell did you give one of the assistant coaches your number anyways?

Nadira: I didn't, he got it from the main directory. I can't stand...oh come on are you kidding me!

Ace: What?

Nadira: I can't believe he sent me this. Seriously, look what he sent me.

Nadira shows Ace the picture on her phone.

Ace: Oh god, is that what I think it is?

Nadira: Unfortunately.

Ace: Jesus, it looks like a broken wizards staff.

Gandalf: Hey let me see that thing. (Checks out the sext) Oh yeah, no kidding (looks down at his own staff, the real one not the one he was born with) it really does look like that. What the hell did he do to it? I mean, how badly can one beat himself up to gain such an unattractive little guy.

Ace: Little being the operative word.

They all laugh and feel a little sick at the same time.

Ace: All right boss, deal me in again. I'm feeling lucky.

The dealer begins to lay the cards down in front of Ace when a less then pleased young lady puts her hands over Ace's card that has been dropped down in front of him.

Julie Artrip: Lucky my ass. What kind of bulls#$% you pulling here Ace.

Ace: By what could you mean by that Ms...I'm sorry who are you again.

Julie: That would be Mrs. Artrip and I'm talking about your Stelleraction technique that I've heard so much about.

Nadira: Whatch you talking about b#$%h?

Ace: When did you get getto?

Julie: You know what I'm talking about b#$%h! And if I were you I would step the back off from me or you'll see what I've been hiding behind this excellently concealed exterior.

Nadira: What, you think you've got something that I can't handle?

Julie: Oh know, I don't think, I know I've got something you can't handle. Not only that, I don't even think you'd even know where to start with this s#$%!

Nadira: Oh yeah, well let's see what you can do with this.

Nadira then attempts to take over Julie's mind. I say attempts because as she does this she instantly gets a throbbing pain in the center of her forehead that nearly makes her pass out.

Julie: Oh did you not like that? Well then I guess you're probably not going to like this either.

Julie then sends a powerful surge of energy through Nadira that completely eviscerates her. There is now just a strange red mist floating in the air next to Ace.

Ace: Well damn honey, you told her. Now how about you give these cards a good rub down and give me some luck for this next deal.

Julie: I'll do you one better.

Julie then reaches down below on Ace until she is right where he wants her.

Julie: Feel good?

Ace: Oh you know it.

Julie: Not for long.

Julie then ignites her light saber right between his legs and then brings the blade right up until she has sliced him in half, hot dog style. The two pieces of his body then fall to the ground as Julie puts her light saber back in her belt.

Gandalf: Very impressive Mrs. Artrip. Though I will admit, it is a shame that it will be your last hand.

Julie immediately tries to block Gandalf's magic but due to his power is unable to deflect what he has to send her way as she finally finds her resting place in the graveyard.

Chris Artrip: Wrong move old man.

Gandalf: I doubt that.

Gandalf then sends a blast of magic towards Chris that he barely manages to escape via his jet pack. Chris then sends a missile down towards Gandalf that he easily deflects, though the missile does manage to blow up a roulette table where the rest of the Royal Flush gang had been hanging out at, killing them all in the process.

Chris: Well it looks like their luck finally ran out.

The entire casino groaned at Mr. Artrip's one-liner.

Chris: What? Like you all weren't thinking it too.

Chris then took off towards the exit of the casino knowing that escaping Gandalf twice in one match was highly unlikely. This fight was not over though as he would be hell bent on exacting revenge on the wizard for killing the love of his life.

On the other side of the casino though, the action was just beginning to heat up.

BL Mike Sroka, Pete Sosa: Dark Jedi, BL Bryan Beckerman, Sith Lord Mike Sroka and Battle Pope were engaged in a very intense game of Texas Hold'em.

Battle Pope: (Takes a huge drag off of his dark as knight Ghurka triple maduro cigar) Whatcha doing sister? Waiting for the river to flood?

Pete Sosa: (Takes a drag from his Montecristo White Label cigar) Come on man, make a f#$%ing bet.

Sith Lord Mike Sroka: Your lack of patience disturbs me.

Battle Pope: Your lack of anything resembling intelligence disturbs me.

Sith Lord Mike Sroka shoots an evil look back at the immoral pope.

Battle Pope: Oh what, is that supposed to intimidate me? I've been bitch slapped by God and Satan in the same day so trust me when I say an untoward look from you does about as much to frighten me as a house fly landing on my arm.

The Sith Lord then taps the table and passes the bet to BL Mike Sroka.

Pete Sosa: Are you F#$#ing kidding me. You take two minutes of my f#$*ing life up just to f#$*ing call the godd#*$ bet!

Battle Pope: Hey, watch your mouth.

Pete Sosa: Don't you start with me to!

As you can tell the mood at this table is very contentious, though with two Black Lanterns, a Sith Lord and a Dark Jedi did you really expect anything else.

Battle Pope: Hey, what about me?

I'm sorry, two Black Lanterns, a Sith Lord, a Dark Jedi and a controversial Pope.

Battle Pope: Controversial, but loved Pope.

Yeah whatever, what he said. Anyways, back to the game.

BL Mike Sroka: Unlike my ball-less alter ego I'm gonna raise it.

Sith Lord Mike Sroka: You would raise it you sack of s#$#!

BL Mike Sroka: Your face is a sack of s@$%!

Sith Lord Mike Sroka: That's it, f##@ you!

Sith Lord Mike Sroka then sent a deadly surge of Sith lightening through the body of BL Mike Sroka, killing him.

Pete Sosa: Oh no you don't.

Pete Sosa then jumped out of his chair and sent his light saber through the throat of Sith Lord Mike Sroka, killing him.

BL Bryan Beckerman: Oh the hell you don't.

BL Bryan Beckerman then blasted Pete Sosa with his Black Lantern ring and ripped the heart out of his still live body. BL Bryan Beckerman then feasted on the still staring eyes of Pete Sosa. By the time Bryan was finished with the heart the Dark Jedi had perished. All that was left by this time was a still cigar smoking Battle Pope who was just looking intently at the Black Lantern.

BL Bryan Beckerman: Don't you even think about it you pathetic excuse for a leader. You already know I have a problem with you in the first place.

Battle Pope: Even in death you insist on bringing religion into it.

BL Bryan Beckerman: Hey, you guys started it.

Battle Pope: We started it? Are you kidding me? Oh so you're telling me it wasn't your people who killed...

BL Bryan Beckerman: It was the Romans. For the last time, it was the f#$#ing Romans. Didn't you see the 'Passion of the Christ'?

Battle Pope: Interesting, you bring Mel Gibson into this. I knew I liked you for some reason.

BL Bryan Beckerman then sent a fatal blast of energy through the maligned Pope, killing him.

BL Bryan Beckerman: Don't you ever bring Mel Gibson into this. Only I can bring Mel Gibson into this.

With that, BL Bryan Beckerman flies away and looks for another game he can join.

Over On The Side Of The Casino

Aro: Can you believe how long this line is?

Caius: No, this is ridiculous.

Ben: I know, I thought this would be a much better idea but I guess I was wrong.

Marcus: Your nature conflicts me.

Ben: Are you talking to me?

Marcus: Yes, I can't tell where you are coming from.

Ben: I'm coming from a place that gives you the feeling that you know you have to piss.

Marcus: Yes I know that but I can't tell if you want to pee standing up or pee sitting down.

Caius: Dude, what the hell are you talking about?

Marcus: Oh I'm sorry; I forget that you don't have any powers Caius.

Caius: Oh yes and as usual I see your powers are going to such great use.

Ben: Hey look guys, it's okay. Not many people can see what this guy's picking up.

Aro then grabs a hold of the young man and immediately let's go.

Aro: My god, you are not what you appear to be.

Ben: My god is right.

Before the three Volturi members even know what to do with themselves, they are torn to pieces as the hell god unleashes her fiery on them.

Glory: Well that should move the line a little bit faster. Excuse me boys, I think I will go on over to the ladies room, it looks like that line is actually moving.

(For the record, Glory is Ben and Ben is Glory. Glory is Ben and Ben is Glory)

On over at the roulette table Joseph, Freddy Krueger and Sebastian Shaw are cleaning up, though this isn’t exactly surprising considering what they are known for.

Sue Yerazzov: This is some bullshit; you guys have literally won every single time.

Joseph: Oh I suppose you are correct. I guess lady luck is just on our side tonight.

Jim Tebow: Are you kidding me right now? Luck has nothing to do with this. If it were anymore obvious you were using your powers you’d be wearing a t-shirt that said, “I won in Vegas by cheating”.

Sebastian Shaw then closes his suit coat jacket as to not show the gaudy t-shirt he had made for himself.

Hot Fudge Harry: Hey baby, it’s alllll good. We just need to get along and forget our troubles. It’s free love baby.

Freddy: Is this guy for real?

Sue: He just watched the “Woodstock” documentary and he’s now obsessed with free love.

Sebastian Shaw: Huh, well that’s…interesting.

Sue: Interesting is you being polite I assume? He’s an idiot.

Jim Tebow: Come on, roll the damn thing. I got a feeling with this one.

The dealer rolls the wheel one more time and not surprisingly Joseph, Freddy and Sebastian win again.

Jim Tebow: Shit! I really had a good feeling about that one.

Sue: Jim, they’re cheating. We can’t win.

Joseph: You guys do realize that if you followed our lead and bet the same as us you would win as well. Please tell me this has occurred to you and you’re not really that thick.

Jim Tebow: No way man, if I’m gonna win I want to win on my own.

Joseph: Huh, well that explains a lot about Logical Genocide as a whole actually.

Freddy: Come on you guys, lets get out of here. We should hit the slots before we leave.

Sebastian Shaw: Yeah, we’ve already won enough at this one. Let’s hit that Debbie Reynolds slot machine, I loved her in the “Unsinkable Molly Brown”.

Joseph: All right, good call.

Freddy: Wait, first things first. Hey you guys, I’m having a feeling about 29 this game.

Sue: Really?

Jim Tebow: No way.

Freddy: Just do it you guys, trust me.

Hot Fudge Harry: Just trust him baby, Freddy ain’t gonna do us wrong.

They all put money down on 29. The wheel spins and spins until finally the ball lands on…35.

Sue: You son of a bitch.

Freddy: Hahahahahahahahaha, dumbasses.

The three of them walk away from the table but not before Jim Tebow attempts to throw his sword at Freddy from behind. He naturally misses but in the process the sword pierces and kills Vince Clortho who had been sitting down at a poker table.

Freddy: Oh you stupid mother f#@$er.

Freddy then sends a blast of yellow energy at the roulette table, completely disintegrating everyone at it.

Zuul: Thanks Freddy.

Freddy: No probs Zu Zu.

Zuul: He was cleaning up over here anyway so it’s not exactly the worst thing in the world.

They all laugh and then go back to playing. The super powered trio of Joseph, Freddy and Sebastian then continue to go around to every single Debbie Reynolds slot machine and win the jackpot on all of them. They laugh and laugh and soon enough move onto another machine. After this they grow tired of playing games and begin to chat up anybody they can find. They hang out with Vampire Achilles for a bit at the Wheel of Fortune game, they smoke a cigar with Jean Grey, Flamebird and Nightwing whilst taking in a Dean Martin impersonation lounge act and even shoot the shit with Merlin and the Golden Army Soldiers who are in the high stakes poker room.

While this is going on Cosmic Spiderman and Gandalf are standing on the second floor of the Luxor looking down at main floor in disbelief.

Cosmic Spider Man: I can’t believe I am about to say this but I don’t think I can take anymore talking in this match.

Gandalf: I know exactly what you mean.

Cosmic Spider Man: I know but coming from me you have to admit that’s pretty crazy.

Gandalf: Yes, I got the reference in your statement.

CSM: I know but still, from me saying I can’t stand anymore talking is pretty weird.

Gandalf: I know, I said I got it. So what was your point?

CSM: Oh yeah, well I’m sick of hearing all the talking…

Gandalf: You’re still making the same point.

CSM: Let me finish, Jesus Christ. I was saying that we should just end this thing right here and now. I mean, I basically have the same powers as Silver Surfer…

Gandalf lets out a huge laugh and then realizes he wasn’t joking.

Gandalf: Oh you weren’t joking. Sorry. Anyways, what were you saying?

CSM: I was saying we should just end this thing. How about you take out the trio over there and I go straight for Jean Grey and the girls over there.

Gandalf: Well okay but I don’t know if we can do it on our own. Shouldn’t we get some help?

CSM: We don’t need their help; we are so incredibly powerful it is ridiculous.

Gandalf: Well I don’t know about that.

CSM: God damn it Gandalf, now were talking just as much as they were.

Gandalf: Hey you started it.

Back Up in the Starship Casino

Pokerface: I got it Han, how about we just crash the ship into the Casino down there.

Han Solo: And why would we do that?

Pokerface: Because it is just our team up here. If we set the ship on a course to crash into the Luxor we can all evacuate the ship and then use the ship as a bomb on the casino, ending the match.

Han Solo: You realize that would kill everybody on our team as well.

Pokerface: Who cares, we’d win the match. It doesn’t matter how we win, just as long as we win right?

Han Solo: (Thinks about it for a bit and then a small smirk appears on his face) You know what kid, I think I actually agree with you. Come on, I’ll even let you fly her again.

Pokerface: I knew I could think of something. Now let’s go end this thing.

Back down on the street level Raiden has taken Kid Thunder outside as the kid has had one too many shots of Jack Daniels.

Raiden: It’s all right. Just get it out of your system. Trust me, you’ll feel a lot better afterwards.

As Kid Thunder throws up a lung on the street outside the Luxor, Raiden stares up at the sky and notices the Starship Casino changing direction. In fact, it looks like it is headed directly for the Luxor hotel and casino. He knows that him and the kid are the only hope to stop this from occurring so he quickly tries to revive the kid. He runs back into the casino and grabs two bottled waters and one very large glass of whisky.

Raiden: Okay kid, I need you back in working order right away so you have to drink this.

Kid Thunder: No way, I can’t drink anything.

Raiden: You have to, that ship is coming right for us and we are the only hope of stopping it.

Kid Thunder: No, I can’t.

Raiden: Damn it kid, just do it. Do you want to be the god of thunder one day or not.

Kid Thunder: I don’t think it works like that but yeah, of course I do.

Raiden: Well then suck it up and chug this shit.

The Kid looks up at Raiden and realizes what he has to do. He then takes the two bottles of water and consumes then immediately.

Raiden: Now for the real test.

Kid Thunder: Really? More whisky?

Raiden: Trust me, this isn’t my first rodeo. It’s the only way.

Kid Thunder: Okay, if you say so.

The kid starts to drink it and almost immediately wants to throw it back up. Raiden puts his hand over the kids’ mouth to keep the whisky in.

Raiden: Don’t throw it up. Now finish it off.

The kid reluctantly does this as Raiden once again puts his hand over his mouth. Once it is all down the Kid feels like garbage but after a few minutes begins to feel alive again. He then looks up at Raiden and gives him the look that only a drunk idiot can give someone.

Raiden: That’s my boy. Now lets blow this ship the f#$% up!

Kid Thunder: F#@$ Yeah BABY!!!!!

The two thunder gods then use their combined powers to send an electrical storm the likes of which have never been seen directly into the center of the Starship Casino. The ship immediately begins to falter and soon enough it splits in half and falls down to the ground, destroying the Golden Palm and the Excalibur in the process.

Raiden: Nice work kid

Kid Thunder: Thanks…Dad

Raiden begins to get teary eyed and the two of them embrace each other in a loving example of father and son. BL Bryan Beckerman then walks out of the hotel and sees the loving embrace between the two Horsemen.

BL Bryan Beckerman: Ahhhh, how sweet. Not quite as sweet as this though.

BL BB then sends a deadly blast of lantern energy into the lightening god duo, killing them together during their final embrace. BL Beckerman then devoured the hearts of the two now graveyard residents. As he finishes off the two hearts he turns around and is taken aback by what or should I say whom, he is looking at.

BL BB: Wait, I thought I killed you. I know I killed you.

BL BB is in disbelief as Raiden is standing right in front of him, looking and talking back at him.

Gozar the Gozarian: Oh you did kill him, but you didn’t kill me.

Gozar then walks away from him but before BL BB is able to grasp a hold of the situation he finds himself staring up a monstrous metallic being who looks sterile yet pissed.

Gozar the Gozarian: Okay, kill the man

The Destroyer then opens up this face shield and sends a deadly blast directly through the body of the black lantern, instantly killing him.

Back Inside The Casino

Cosmic Spider Man and Gandalf have literally been talking this entire time, still trying to decide who should kill who.

Cosmic Spider Man: You know what, lets make this easy.

Cosmic Spider Man then flies up to the top of the Luxor and unleashes a massive cosmic energy wave on the ceiling of the casino, sending it crashing to the ground floor. Pure chaos breaks out and within seconds everybody from both teams is fighting for their lives. As Cosmic Spiderman looks down on the chaos he as created and smiles as he sees the dead bodies of Amazon #2, Glory who just so happened to be in her Ben form at the time and Zuul, who failed to follow Gozar outside of the Casino. He was lucky enough to only kill Plastic Baby and Gandalf’s horse Shadowfax from his team, two losses that were likely not going to play into the match either way.

Cosmic Spider Man: Sorry about the horse Gandalf.

Gandalf: You should be you piece of s#$%!

The chaos continued as the trio of Joseph, Freddy and Sebastian Shaw were now in a drag em out fight with Merlin and the Golden Army. The combined forces of the trio managed to kill Golden Army soldiers #41-43 but in the process Freddy lost his life. This angered Joseph greatly as he then took the final two Golden Army soldiers and sent them crashing together, ending their lives. Now it was just Merlin left to fight the two super powered Horsemen. Though the odds were against him, Merlin just stood there, smiled and said something out loud that made no sense to his opponents.

Sebastian Shaw: What did he say?

Joseph: I don’t know and I don’t care. Step back though, this is gonna be sweet.

Joseph then began to use his magnetic powers on the broken Golden Army soldiers. As he was about to send the metal straight at Merlin though, he realizes that the metal debris was not going to be smashing into the wizard, but himself. He realized this too late because before he knew it, he was being ripped to shreds by the same metal that he was only seconds ago trying to destroy Merlin with. Merlin just stood there and laughed as he stared down at the dead body of Joseph.

Merlin: There’s nothing that a little magic can’t do.

Then out of nowhere an unknown voice whispered into Merlin’s ear, “That’s true, but there’s also nothing quite like a good pair of fangs to get the job done as well” as Vampire Achilles sank his teeth into the wizard. Merlin tried to fight off the immortal fighter but before long he had been drained dry.

Vamp Achilles: Wow, did I need that. Now come Sebastian, you got stage fright or something? Fight back for your team you pussy. Don’t just stand there and act like you’ve never been in a fight before.

Sebastian Shaw: You see Achilles, why would I fight when I know you’ll just do it for me.

Achilles sends a menacing look back at his teammate as the always smug Sebastian Shaw just smiles back at him.

Sebastian Shaw: Well, are we going to end this or are you just going to stare at me forever?

The two of them take off towards the action on the other side of the mostly destroyed casino. Which ‘Action’ is really the only word to describe what is going on as Cosmic Spiderman and Gandalf are putting on a show that even Siegfried and Roy would be proud of. The most impressive part of the show thus far was when Gandalf managed to deflect the Destroyers blast to not only kill the Destroyer himself, but also take out Gozar the Gozarian in the process. That is not to say that Cosmic Spiderman wasn’t holding his own, as he was single handedly taking on Jean Grey, Flamebird and Nightwing at the same time. The fight was amazingly even but after a while even the super powered Spiderman knew he had no chance in this fight. Not one to go into the night quietly though, his final attack was of the middle eastern variety as he flew into Jean Grey and gave her a bear hug to end all bear hugs. With the use of his vast cosmic powers, he imploded himself like a dying star, taking her with him in the process. The blast to come out of Cosmic Spiderman’s actions was so blinding that everyone in the casino was sent down to the ground, momentarily blinded by the light.

Once the dust settled and everyone took stock in their surroundings, the remaining Horsemen looked around and saw nothing but friendly faces. Flamebird, Nightwing, Sebastian Shaw, Vampire Achilles, Josh, Laya and Alex were the only ones left in the fight.

Nightwing: Is the wizard dead, I don’t see a body?

Flamebird: I don’t remember him dying, I mean, if that blast didn’t kill any of us I doubt it would have killed him.

Josh: Yeah, I don’t see his body anywhere.

Flamebird: Wait, where the hell were you guys?

Josh: Who me?

Flamebird: Yes you Josh. Where the hell were you and the kids.

Josh: We were outside by the pool. The kids wanted to go swimming so I figured since we didn’t have a green lantern in the match anyways that I might as well just let them have some fun. I mean, this blue ring is pretty useless on its own.

Flamebird: Well, yeah I suppose you’re right. Well I guess it’s over then.

Vampire Achilles: I don’t think so; we need to find the wizard. I want to taste his blood. That power will be incredible.

Sebastian Shaw: Yes, I’m sure it will be amazing (nothing but sarcasm from this guy).

Flamebird: Just let it go Achilles, the match is over.

Laya: Daddy.

Josh: Yeah honey, what’s up?

Laya: Where’s uncle Chris?

Josh: You know, I don’t know.

Outside the destroyed casino a very low key Gandalf is attempting to flag a taxi without anybody noticing him. Since the city streets surrounding the casino are completely destroyed, there are naturally no taxicabs within a mile radius of the place. Then out of nowhere a beat to shit car pulls up and stops right in the front of him.

Cab Driver: Where you headed?

Gandalf: Anywhere but here.

Cab Driver: I hear ya, get in.

Gandalf: Thanks man, you’re a lifesaver.

Gandalf then gets in the back seat of the car and shuts the door. He then sits back in the seat and relaxes for the first time in a while.

Cab Driver: Rough day.

Gandalf: You have no idea.

Cab Driver: Yeah same here. Earlier tonight I had a really bad altercations with this asshole wearing his bathrobe in the middle of the f@#$ing day.

Gandalf: (Barely listening) Is that right.

Cab Driver: Yeah and then he did something that I just couldn’t believe.

Gandalf: Oh yeah, what was that?

Cab Driver: He went and killed the only woman I’ve ever loved.

Gandalf: Wait, he did what?

The cab driver was now silent and just staring straight a head, no longer driving.

Gandalf: Wait; what did you say you name was again?

Cab Driver: I didn’t.

And with that Chris Artrip turned around and ignited his green light saber directly into the face of the Lord of the Rings wizard, there fore ending his FFL career.

Chris Artrip: By the way, the names Fizz and that my friend is what you get when you fuck with an Artrip.