S6W9 - Empire vs Red Army

The Red Army is: Friedrich Nietzsche w/Space Infinity Gem (Purple), Baby Nightcrawler, Worf, T-3 Terminator, Katniss Everdeen w/Green Lantern Ring.

The Empire is: Mon Mothma, Mike Huckabee, Bill O'Reilly, Aaron Griswold (with trusty Estwing hammer), Bill Kelly Dark Jedi Master (with Blue Light Saber, energy bow and arrow and plumb hammer), Deception decoy #5, Force Adept #6.

The teams arrive in Arkham and are placed in a giant medical room that appears to be used for crazy 1960s physiological experiments.  Both teams depressed as they both know that they will not make the playoffs this year.  The two female representatives of each team

“Hey there.” Says Mon Mothma.

“Hey” Says Katniss Everdeen.

“This match is kinda pointless right?”

“Yeah, but we gotta play ‘em out.” Says Katniss.

“Why did your owner start you though?  In a week that doesn’t mean anything, he should be saving your deaths for next season.”  A curious Mon Mothma says to The Mockingjay.

“I don’t know.  He’s a retard.” An annoyed Everdeen says back.

“You know,” Mon Mothma says, “We don’t HAVE to fight.”

Katniss raises her eyebrow… “But that’s against the rules.  And both of us are very well known for following the rules.” She says.

Katniss and Mon Mothma both laugh.

“Well how do we compete without fighting?” asks Mon Mothma

The teams decide on a series of three competitive challenges to decide the winner.  The Deception Decoy will be a non bias judge and will not compete in the challenges.

Challenge 1 – Political Debate.  Mike Huckabee and Bill O’Reilly vs T3 Terminator.

The Terminator’s accelerated age and his lack of ability to speak in anything more than sputtering sentence fragments prove to be his downfall against the fast talking O’Reilly and the former Baptist minister. 

Empire leads 1-0.

Challenge 2 – Archery.  Katniss Everdeen vs Bill Kelly.

No contest.  Bill Kelly is sharp with his energy bow but The Girl on Fire is second to no one in an archery competition. 

Tied 1-1

Challenge 3 – Straight jacket relay.  Mon Mothma, Aaron Griswold and Force Adept #6 vs. Friedrich Nietzsche, Worf and Baby Nightcrawler. 

The 6 contestants are strapped up in straight jackets and they line up in two lines of three next to each other.  The objective is to run across the room and then come back before the next person on your team can go.  Mon Mothma and Worf square off first for their teams.  Worf is an experienced warrior and Mon Mothma is in a long dress.  Worf is back first and Nietzsche takes off.  He is halfway across the room when Mon Mothma finally gets back to tag in Aaron Griswold.  He takes off and quickly catches up with Nietzsche as they go to tag in their final teammates.  Force Adept takes off and Baby Nightcrawler begins to… well crawl.  Force Adept makes it back easily to cross the finish line before the Baby.