S11 Preseason: Affirmative Action Popeyes vs. Barkley’s Turrible Decisions

Affirmative Action Popeyes are: Beachhead,  Road Block,  Gung Ho, Lt. Flint,  John Rambo, Sailor Moon

Barkley’s Turrible Decisions are: Khal Drogo, The Batman who Laughs, All-Might, Sonja Blade, Mega Man X

“So this is the place” said Gung Ho outloud to no one in particular as the Popeyes gather outside the entrance of Bob’s Burgers.

“AAAHHHHH!!” screams Sailor Moon as John Rambo literally tears her in half for no reason and leaves her destroyed corpse on the sidewalk. 

Beachhead kicks in the door and the Popeyes rush in. They interrupt Khal Drogo telling jokes in Dothraki that no one quite understood but The Batman Who Laughs seemed to still be enjoying it as he sits at the counter trying to sip on his coffee but cannot catch his breath during his gasps of laughter. 

“Hahahahaha!”

Road Block and Gung Ho start firing shots around the room and shoot Sonja Blade in the head. 

“Hahahahaha!”

All-Might rush the pair and pick them both up and crush their skulls together. 

“Hahahahaha!”

Mega Man X blasts Beachhead with a shot from his blaster and Lt. Flint Returns the favor with a bullet of his own just before Khal Drogo’s sword finds its mark in his chest.

“Hahahahaha!”

All-Might had rushed over and grabbed Rambo but was unable to squeeze him to death as his head was filled with lead from Rambo’s machine gun. 

“Hahahahaha!”

On one knee trying to catch his breath, Rambo watches as Drogo removes his blade from Flint’s chest and marches toward him. As Rambo raises his gun to fire, Drogo chops the arms off of Rambo. 

“Hahahahaha!”

Rambo stares helplessly at his stumpy arms as the blood pours into his lap. A shimmer dances over the liquid and he slowly glances up.

“Hahahahaha!”

 The sunlight reflecting off Drogo’s sword is the final fleeting image he sees.

“Hahahahaha!” Batman continues to howl with laughter at the counter as Drogo stares back at his teammate annoyed.