Week 3: Consolation Match - B3 v Right Wing: Formal Charges Filed

Vader: Please be advised that after further discussion with my owner, we believe it necessary to file a Formal Complaint against Watcher Nickatu and The Right Wing. The charges to be filed are as follows:


1. Breach of Contract: Nickatu clearly breached his contract with the League because of his abhorrent "watching" of the relevant match. Due to this breach, as well as the charges filed below, we are requesting the Commissioner suspend him from further "watching" functions (except for the Bar-B-Q) until January 1, 2010.


2. Breach of Fiduciary Duty: As a Watcher, Nickatu is to be an unbiased observer of the matches presented to him. It is clear from the match's outcome that the results were unscrupulously erroneous, as well as Nick's persona being immensely fabricated. Thus, Nickatu acted as a conduit for his "human" self and not in the best interests of the match, and more importantly, the league. Shame on him!!!


3. Fraud and/or Misrepresenation: Nick is a p#$$y, pure and simple. He is not a shotgun toting weapon of mass destruction that he was represented to be in the match by Nickatu. Further, Nick would not treat Belle as he did- a piece of a$$ as hot as that- - no way. She would have his tiny genitalia wrapped around her finger.


4. Civil Conspiracy: It is clear that a conspiracy has taken place in the FFL; the parties being The Right Wing, Nick Houslander and Nickatu. As such, we will be requesting punitive damages (Nick suffering an additional death - which would have occurred had the match been written properly) and exemplary damages (the deaths of Pablo and Belle not being counted- lives restored). Given the grievous nature of the transaction which has occurred, it is only fair.


On behalf of B3, we are requesting a formal written response from the Commissioner to address all of the above points of conern.


Thank you.

-Vader