Week One: The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets vs The Right Wing

The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets is X-23 and Salacious B. Crumb.

The Right Wing is Black Lantern She-Hulk, Nick Houslander w/Blue Lightsaber, and Bear w/Green Lightsaber.


“Joan Jett?? Hells yeah!” exclaims Nick Houslander as he finishes off his coffee as The Right Wing enters Josh’s Apartment. Bear immediately sees Salacious B. Crumb perched up on top of one of the speakers in the corner. “Be’s bine Bick!” shouts Bear as he lunges at the cackling creature. They both crash to the floor, Bear quickly ignites his lightsaber and drives it through Salacious several times (possibly a few too many). “Damn dude, calm down,” Nick says to his long time partner. But before Bear can respond to Nick, they are both kicked to the ground by X-23. She then turns her attention to the real threat, which is Black Lantern She-Hulk. The zombified female version of The Hulk squares off against the female clone of Wolverine (appropriate, huh?) in a battle the causes severe damage to the living area of Josh’s Apartment. Nick and Bear have retreated to outside and are looking through the door wall. Nick looks at bear and says, “So…. Think Josh will get his security deposit back? Hahahaha.” Black Lantern She-Hulk grabs a hold of X-23 and launches her through the wall in-between the living room and the kitchen. X-23 crashes through and knocks over the refrigerator. B.L. She-Hulk then flies in and goes to finish off her opponent, but X-23 flip kicks her way back on to her feet, and in doing so slices off B.L. She-Hulk’s right arm with her foot claw. X-23 then lunges at her and slashes her way through B.L. She-Hulk’s chest until there is nothing but a mass of rotting flesh on the floor of the kitchen.

X-23 then calmly walks back into the living room sets the record player back up and drops the needle back down on the vinyl. She then looks at Nick and Bear who are outside the sliding door. X-23, with claws still extended, motions with her finger for the two of them to come back inside. “Awww, this is going to suck Bear,” Nick laments to his old chum. Bear nods his head and is the first one to rush in towards X-23. Nick is quick to follow, both of them have their lightsabers drawn, but X-23 is just too quick for them. She spin kicks Nick and slashes him across his chest. Lucky for him, it’s not a mortal wound, which is most likely due to his thick chest mane. As he regains his footing, he looks up to see Bear being ripped in half by X-23. “NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!” Nick shouts (A lot like Obi Wan did when he saw Qui Gon get killed by Darth Maul). Nick in a blinded rage rushes X-23, but she back flips over him and drives her claws right through his neck. Nick drops to the ground and the last thing he hears is Joan Jett’s voice singing “Ah, now I don't hardly know her, But I think I could love her, Crimson and clover.”

THE BROTHERHOOD OF EVIL MIDGETS IS VICTORIOUS!!