The Horsemen of Apokolips Vs. The Royal Highness

“I do not like what I cannot understand” says Darkseid to his old friend Gozar the Gozarian. Gozar does not speak; but only nods relaying his full intentions mentally. Darkseid continues: “I kow not of this exterior war that plagues us, and worse yet I see no way for The Horsemen to shift this to our favor. The Watchers seem to be gone. Something that these worthless Federalist Rebels have concocted has made them powerless over their own planet. Ryatu has been off the radar for two years. Joshatu also cannot be found now, nor can that idiot Pogo. With them gone the other Watchers volley for power, and yet are power is not increased in the least. I realize that we are supposed to be unaware of their existence, but as you know I am well aware of who watches what. But for now, we have Mogo to deal with, among numerous others; so we must focus on the match, and not the rebellion”. Gozar nods once more as Darkseid simply says: “Let us begin”.

As this match begins, Superman is nowhere to be found. The members of The Highness hope that perhaps their allies against The Populists have dispatched Superman in some other way, they simply know that they do not see him anywhere.

The battle is spread across the war torn Play-Off Planet as these two teams have people stationed everywhere, except for the city area, where the other double battle is taking place.

Darkseid leads the space team against Mogo. Mogo is alone in space except for Lex Luthor circling the planet in a Tie Bomber and True Q, who is peacefully awaiting what comes next on Mogo itself sipping tea whilst sitting on a lightly moss covered log. But in Darkseid’s flank is Scar, Ramjet, and three ships: Obi Wan piloting his Z-95, Anakin in his Tie Interceptor and the Darth Vader Transformer.

Down in the desert, Achilles, Deathstroke, Elixir, the essence of Gozar, along with Zuul and Vince Clortho waiting by, and The Witch King of Angmar. They await the coming of the sandworm. But in the meantime several members of The Highness await the coming of their Sandworm as well. Yoda, sits back with The Red Hood and Robin in The Battlehawk, while NFG Mike is bouncing around on his steed Yoshi attempting to make a patter of noises to summon the mighty Maker and bring an end to The Horsemen’s perfect season.

The Revenge hovers within the atmosphere of The Play-Off Planet, high above the city region. As they fly by the battle between the other four teams is observed from those on board. The Fantastic Four, Prof. X, Vampire Kang and his 8 legged assistant, and Heather Houslander. Batman, Stitich, GL Ryan, and Wonder Woman have been scoping out the ship for some time, but are still uncertain of what their play will be.

Apocalypse has chosen to stay away from familiarity considering that The Highness have unleashed a Sandworm on this planet’s desert. So instead, Apocalypse waits in the darkened jungle, with night upon them along with Morgan LeFay, Vampire Jean Grey, and Ewok #2. It is here that the action begins as Horsemen veteran Bugs Bunny leads the charge of the remaining Horsemen Havoc, Optimus Prime, and Legolas hanging out of what is normally the driver’s side of McLane’s Jeep The Millenium Bucko as it bounces through the swampy wooded landscape. Apocalypse and his team see that they are outnumbered, as Jean Grey senses that The Balrog of Moria and Smaug are coming in from either side of them and that soon after that Godzilla will make his way to the scene. Morgan LeFay uses her faerie magic to blow The Bucko apart sending McLane and Legolas in different directions. As the Balrog and Godzilla take their sweet time getting there, Smaug swoops in and engages Vampire Jean, while Havoc is holding off Apocalypse with his energy projection. Havoc is then joined by Optimus against the age old mutant. Optimus and Apocalypse clash violently as unnaturally hard metal is heard bending and breaking for miles. Havoc cannot get a shot off without hurting Optimus, so he turns his attention to his former sister in law Jean Grey. Jean Dodges an attack from Smaug; but is then hit full on by a blast from Havoc. She could have normally shrugged this off; but with his solar power pumping through her vampire body even she is unable to sustain and is destroyed. Apocalypse then punches a hole through the chest of Optimus Prime and is able to extinguish his spark. The heavily damaged Apocalypse manages to rip of an arm of Optimus and use it baseball bat Havoc right the hell out of this match. Apocalypse attempts to regain his strength and composure when he is met by the enormous foot of Godzilla crushing his body into nothingness. McLane somersaults to the right and then to the left taking pot shots at Morgan LeFay; but having her dodge or deflect all of them (although he does manage to get lucky and have a stray bullet take out Ewok #2). Morgan then focuses her power on McLane to blow him into a bloody mess of pieces; but is shortly taken out by two green energy covered arrows from Legolas: one in each eye.

Back in space, Darkseid hangs back with Scar, while he sends in the four ships, not towards Mogo; but against Luthor in his Tie Bomber. Luthor fires concussion missiles and Ion blasts, but his ship is much slower and although an accomplished pilot is no match for the skills of Anakin. Anakin blows up the ship; but Luthor comes flying out in his green space suit. What happens next is strange…??.... After evading blasts from Kenobi and the Sith Transformer, Ramjet transforms into robot and suddenly grabs a hold of Luthor. Ramjet then transforms once again back into jet form putting Luthor inside his cockpit and locking the Cybertronian mechanism. Luthor is unharmed and instantly begins cracking the code until Ramjet jumps into warp speed and rockets himself into the closest super nova. Anakin and Obi Wan come over their com links wondering why one of their transformers would sacrifice themselves against a human when they still have Mogo to fight. Darkseid comes over the com link and states: “Ramjet was a great soldier, a true fighter for the cause and a Horsemen for life. His contribution since Season 1 has been great and there is no greater way to sacrifice one’s self to the graveyard for such a worthy cause”.

Scar nods in agreement as Kenobi and Skywalker get ever more confused. “But he was just one man, and we have a planet to fight”. Says Kenobi.

Darkseid speaks: “Ahh, But he was not just one man, he was one man with Kryptonite”. At that moment, Superman comes flying out of the lead lined cockpit of The Sith Transformer and the ship transforms into an enormous Darth Vader robot.

Dakseid screams: “ATTACK”!!

The Horsemen swarm Mogo at break neck speed; but Mogo does not sit idle. Massive bursts of green energy come blasting out of Mogo in every direction.

“TAKE EVASIVE ACTION” Screams a muffled voice from within Anakin’s white protective suit.

Darkseid attempts to give his next order, when he all of the sudden disappears into thin air. Superman takes control of the situation and says: “We don’t need Darkseid, stick together and we can win this thing”!!

Superman, Scar, Obi Wan, Anakin, and Vader-former work together and start making great headway against the enormous green lantern; but something else is going on down below on Mogo.

“WHO DARES SUMMON DARKSEID AWAY FROM GLORIOUS BATTLE”. Says Darkseid, who now finds himself in a wooded area inside Mogo itself.

“It was I Lord of Apokolips. I am True Q, and I have a test for you”.

Darkseid aims his omega beams at True Q, but they are merely absorbed by The Q Continuum Member.

He speaks again: “You need not attack me, for it is simply a waste of your time and energy. You see, I can not be hurt unless I allow you to hurt me. But I will give you an opportunity. You see, I have the power to wipe out your entire team, and I have yet to decide if that is truly what I will do. I have taken note that over the years, you are more than willing to let any member of your team sacrifice him or herself for the greater good. You have won many matches because of this, you have already done it once in this match, and since time is relative to me, I already know that you will do this at least once more during the course of this match with your Balrog down below. But the real question is: Do you speak the truth?? Is the greater good of The Horsemen of Apokolips truly the ultimate goal?? Concordantly…. Are you willing to sacrifice yourself for the cause”.

To a mere mortal it would seem as if Darkseid’s answer came instantly; but to True Q, the amount of time Darkseid took to answer the question may as well of been a century.

Darkseid, hating even giving the slightest inclination that there is a being more powerful than he answers with a simple: “Yes”.

True Q speaks again and says: “I am not certain if I believe you. But you know I can destroy The Horsemen today with my powers and you know even though you should not that my powers are accentuated today due to the fact that this could potentially be my 10th time playing the game of death in this league. So I tell you now, and give you this one time offer. Kill yourself instantly, and I will allow your omega beams to kill me as well”.

This time with no hesitation whatsoever, Darkseid unleashes his Omega Beams upward allowing them to rocket through him in suicide and then move on to True Q to kill him as well.

The explosion of these two cosmic entities rock the inside of Mogo giving him the equivalent of planet sized indigestion that would drop a man to his knees. But Mogo is not done yet. He unleashes even more power, this time with a blast that catches Kenobi’s ship in the wing. Kenobi spins out of control and into what will be certain death, when Anakin banks left into his wake. Anakin and Obi Wan have not really ever made up after their alternate universe selves met up on this team and when they last met, it didn’t end so well. Anakin sees this as an opportunity to save an old friend that he knew was right so long ago. Anakin banks left even harder, knowing that his old friend’s life support system will go out soon. Anakin flies in upside down against the cockpit of Kenobi’s ship keeping perfectly level with the erratic craft. Anakin then ejects out of his own cockpit (he is in the white suit remember, so he can be out in space). He ignites his blue lightsaber and cuts free Obi Wan’s cockpit, using the force to pull out his former master and throw him into the cockpit of his own Tie Interceptor. Anakin then uses the force to suck himself back to his Interceptor and land on the top of the hull. A shaken Obi Wan cannot believe what just happened as he shakes it off; but Anakin is already saying: “Come on Master, we have a battle to win, now get us over there”.

Kenobi Flies up as he, The Sith Ship, and Anakin focus their force pushing powers in one central spot on Mogo. Superman and Scar fly up to help, but Scar is caught with an errant blast of energy and destroyed. Mogo then chooses to focus what energy he can muster at The Sith Ship, which he destroys but his choice of targets was poor. Skywalker continues weakening a spot, while Kenobi fires on it from inside The Tie Interceptor. Superman then musters up all his strength and speed, aims for that spot and rockets through the center of Mogo. “Just like TEAM Vs. The Backyardigans back in the day” Superman thinks to himself as he rockets out the other side of the now dead Mogo. Superman is noticeably shaken, when he hears over his earpiece to Jedis saying simultaneously, “COME ON!! Back to the planet, WE’VE GOT A BATTLE TO WIN”.

Green Lantern Ryan, slowly flies Batman up towards The Revenge, with Wonder Woman and Stitch close behind. They get below the ship and time their entry just right. They sneak in through the massive afterburners; but if their timing is off by a split second then they will be burnt to a crisp. They make their way inside and overhear a conversation between Reed Richards and his distant descendent and usual enemy Kang. “I agree Kang, we are still in good shape, even without Mogo, we must maintain the superiority from above in this ship and then we can unleash The Doomsdays.

Ryan, looks to Batman and says in a whisper: “Now we have to attack, right?!!?

Stitch begins to nod in agreement with Ryan and Wonder Woman looks like she wants to; but Batman says: “No, definitely not. The four us could never take all the people on this ship. We need to crash the ship and get The Ultimate Nullifier away from Richards”.

From there, Batman and his crew make their way to a central computer outlet, which Batman hooks into. With one click of a button he shuts off all power to the main thrusters, which brings The Revenge crashing down. As The Thing and Mr. Fantastic are able to crash land safely in the arctic; and when they do, they along with The Horsemen send out a distress call for all available hands to get to the arctic, for what will inevitably be the final battle of these teams.

But back in the desert, there is still unfinished business…..

“We have wormsign, I have seen this transpire too many times” says Achilles.

Vince Clortho and Zuul stand at the ready, without looking scared at all. They have both taken the bodies of Play-Off Planet Citizens and plan to wait for the coming of Gozar. The massive worm bursts from the sand as Achilles, Elixir, Deathstroke, and even The Witch King flee for the rocks. But Zuul and Clortho sit and wait, just focusing on the worm as it comes down upon them. They focus on the weak brain of the mighty Maker and attempt to tap into the worm’s thoughts, if it has any at all. Clortho and Zuul are consumed, but now we must await the coming over Gozar. Gozar then appears in the form of the only thing that a sandworm fears. The only thing that it knows to fear. The only thing it thinks of…… A bigger sandworm. Gozar the Sandworm bursts from the sand as the two worms blast into the side of each other with their thousands of cryskife teeth ripping into each other’s rock hard flesh. The two beasts fall next two each other dead.

(but it seems as though the soul of Gozar lives on…. Perhaps in the being of Zuul)…….

With the Sandworm(s) dead. Achilles and his crew rush to meet Yoda and his. Red Hood swoops in in The Battlehawk, but Deathstroke jumps underneath it and grabs on. He cuts open a spot in the thruster with his razor s sharp sword and then puts a few perfectly aimed bullets in it to send the ship crashing down. The combatants leap from the wreckage and both teams regroup. Deathstroke and Yoda clash in a pitched battle (only Becks shout out of the week)!! While Achilles takes on both of The Jason Todds. The Jason’s begin stabbing Achilles and Red Hood gets in some well aimed shots by them working together, but Elixir heals his old Myrmidon leader up good as knew. Elixir then perhaps gets his first ever legit FFL Solo kill when he manipulates the molecules in Robin and melts him into the sand. NFG Mike rolls up and throws down his Marlboro!!

“Don’t mess with my boy A**HOLE”!! Mike screams as he punches the back of Yoshi’s head making him swallow Elixir whole (**Commish’s note: this isn’t the real Yoshi, so the kill goes to NFG).

Deathstroke moves quickly. But not quick enough for the head Jedi Master. Yoda flips around the head of Slade, doubles back and takes him out with a head shot. Achilles parries the initial hits of Red Hood, but the Red Hood’s brawling techniques end up not being a match for the eloquence of Achilles, who runs him thorugh with his Myrmidon Sword. Yoda then moves in towards The Witch King, who is simply to slow for the smaller Yoda. Yoda dispatches the top Ringwraith with a force induced lightsaber swing through the center almost as fast as Achilles took out NFG and Yoshi. Achilles and Yoda square off against each other what is not the first time in FFL History, nor will it likely be the last. “This could go either way green” says Achilles.

“That it could” says Yoda as they both leap into action. Yoda does the talking through the fight as Achilles is too busy impressing the tiny Jedi with his swordsman abilities. “Your thoughts I can read. Different places you think of. Different types of lives. Ones without violence.. A scholar you are. Much reading you do…. Studying. A fine Jedi you would have been. An edge it would have given you. An edge enough of to prevent this”. Says Yoda as he spins underneath the legs of Achilles cuts off his ankle and then removes his head.

The distress calls have been met…

The teams form up…. This I the end for one of these teams.

The sides are even Stitch, Bugs Bunny, The Balrog, Smaug, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Roller, Anakin, Obi Wan, Legolas, Godzilla, and GL Ryan remain for The Horsemen. Yoda, Prof. X, The Fantastic Four, Doomslayer, The Doomsdays, Vampire Kang, DC Spidey, and Heather for The Highness.

Mr. Fantastic attempts to end the fight before it starts but Batman looks to Ryan and says “NOW”!!

Ryan sends a pot shot blast of green energy at Reed as a diversion when Batman grabs the already activated Nullifier out of the pocket of Richards. Batman throws it to Ryan, who then throws it back to Batman who is already climbing up the front of their own teammate The Balrog of Moria. Batman catches the ultimate nullifier from Ryan, throws it down the massive throat of the blarog and backflips off of him. The balrog grabs his throat as the evilness from the One Ring consumes the nullifier destroying the weapon and melting the balrog from inside out.

At the onset of this explosion all members of both teams jump into action. Heather tries to pick up Stitch because he is SOOOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE!! But Stitch decides to kill her instead of cuddle. GL Ryan mixes it up with DC Spider-man but the not-so-friendly neighborhood Kang creation takes a green colored pencil energy construct to the eye before it can climb to its point of attack. Godzilla is triple-teamed by The three Doomsdays, but Godzilla cuts it to two quick as he swallows Superboy Doomsday quick as he attempts to fly in for an attack. Godzilla then takes a massive beating as Steel and Cyborg go nuts with building leveling punches. Godzilla works up every bit of energy he can muster, and lets it loose on Steel Doomsday, just before Cyborg Doomsday delivers the killing blow to Godzilla’s neck. Legolas shoots numerous arrows at yoda, but none of them find their target. Yoda then leaps into action to see his lightsaber parried by several green energy protected dagger blocks. The two of them engage in a pitched exchange (I didn’t break my promise, that’s not the same as a battle). But in the end Yoda is simply the quicker and better swordsmen, as he ends this skirmish with yet another head removing shot. Obi Wan is still in his Tie Interceptor, as he makes a daring strafing run on Kang’s position. Kang teleports onto the back of his Kenobi’s ship and then uses his cosmic technology reinforced vampire teeth to bite through the hull and crash the ship. Kenobi leaps out of his second wrecked ship of the day and force pushes Kang to the ground. Kang attempts to leap back up; but it was just what Obi Wan was expecting. Kenobi spin attacks in force speed and sends a lightsaber into Vampire Kang’s gut before cutting off his head for good measure. Human Torch attempts to fire blast Anakin’s suit to melt it off his body, but Anakin force blocks the fire and sends it back (not that fire hurts human torch). But what does hurt Storm is Anakin’s force leap into the air and lightsaber to the chest. This brings Human Torch down to the ground, but does not kill him since the fire absorbed much of the attack. But it does absorb the next one, as Anakin uses the force to quell hs flames and then drives his lightsaber into the body of his enemy. Roller rolls at Mr. Fantastic but then rolls over on his side when Mr. Fantastic rolls his arms up into his rolling tires. Roller then rolls over and is straight up rolled out. Wonder Woman and The Thing clash in a fight that causes small eathquakes throughout the arctic region. The Thing bloodies Diana considerably, but eventually a wicked stomp kick from Wonder Woman shatters The Thing into pebbles. Prof. X uses a mind block on the dull creature known as Smaug, but when he does Batman uses this opportunity to hit Xavier with a perfectly aimed batarang to the skull (and weapon) of Xavier. Batman’s rule against killing will just have to get over it. As expected, Superman and Doomslayer have been going at it since the top of the skirmish. The two combatants beat the living hell out of each other much like they always do, but Superman has learned a lot since the first time he met with a Doomsday, and he finds this one just slightly lacking in comparison. Superman is badly beaten up, but it is Doomslayer that doesn’t live through the encounter. Bugs Bunny starts driving Invisible Girl crazy with his antics; so she puts an oxygen proof field over his head. Turns out Bugs needed oxygen to survive…. Go figure.

Round 2

The Richards family goes against Anakin, Obi Wan, and Batman; but finds their powers lacking. Invisible Girl does the same oxygen helmet move on Kenobi and it works after Reed pummels his chest with super fast stretchy punches; but the two Highness FF pair die when Batman hits Mr. Fantastic with a special binding agent in batpill form and Anakin avenges his former master with a good old fashioned lightsaber to the heart. As Superman and Wonder Woman rush in to double team Cyborg Doomsday, Ryan and his homeboy Stitch make a valiant attempt at attacking Yoda, but the B.A. little Jedi doesn’t need to use headshots this time to take out his two opponents (just a bit of flipping and such). The Weakened Superman cannot quite withstand another beating from a Doomsday; but he does get in some wicked hits of his own. Superman unloads the last bit of his energy via heat vision into Cyborg Doomsday. But the Doomsday comes down hard with two massive fists on Superman’s head to finally take out The Man of Steel. As Superman dies the weakened Doomsday turns around just in time to see a massive fist to the face from Wonder Woman that is enough to finish what Superman started.

Round 3

All combatants are more tired than they have ever been, but they are ready for one more bout. Wonder Woman, Batman, and Anakin stand ready, against Yoda, who is the last standing Highness member. Yoda chooses his target, and decides to go after the one he knows best as being a more than formidable foe. Yoda moves faster than any person there has ever seen as he leaps faster than even my eyes can follow into the chest of Anakin, lightsaber first. Batman and Wonder Woman converge on Yoda and claim the victory once and for all……

Wonder Woman gasps for breath and speaks: Well, it looks like The Populists are victorious after all.

Batman retorts: “I’m not sure which victor is scarier as a ruling party The Watchers, The Populists, …… Or The Horsemen.