Better Than All of You vs The Abomitrons

Better Than All of You is Predator #1-12, Terminator #1-12, Green Lantern, Thanos, Mephisto, Skeletor, The Blues Bros., Gwar: Oderus Urungus, Flattus Maximus, Balsac the Jaws of Death, Beefcake the Mighty, Jizmack da Gusha, Slymenstra Hymen, The Sexecutioner, & Sleazy P. Martini, Ghost Rider, Ghost Rider, Loki & Bartleby, Gray Hulk, Abomination, Bishop, Deathlok, Flash, Rob Van Dam, & Sabu.

The Abomitrons are Iron Man, Cyborg Superman, The Crew of Serenity: Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, Zoë, Wash, Book, Anora, Jane, River, & Simon, Mega Man & Rush, Starfire, Raven, Hancock, Cerberus, Phineas & Ferb w/ Perry, Kirby, Stryfe, Abin Sur, Commander Cody, Capt Rex, Elite Clone Trooper #21-36, Baby Colossus, Iron Monger, Widget (w/ body), Montross, Ben 10 Alien Force: Ben Tennyson, Kevin, & Gwen; Falco, Beast, Batman, Robin, & Robin in Blackbird 1, Horri-Bull & Kreb, Zombie #1 & 2, Starship Trooper #51-62, & Naboo Soldier #1.

The Blackbird 1 and Serenity fly into the battle carrying most of the Abomitrons. “Ok men. We need to turn this team around. The Abomitrons need to live up to its name and destroy everything in its path. Now who’s with me?” shout Iron Man. There is a loud cheer heard over their Starktech Comlinks as they all enter the battle. Better Than All of You have already set up their defenses on a large asteroid floating in the rings of Saturn. GWAR stands ready for battle as they see the more super powered members of the Abomitrons fly in. And in one strafing run, Starfire, Cyborg Superman and Iron Man, all collectively destroy GWAR with their energy blasts. Thanos then retaliates by blasting Serenity in its wing, causing it to crash into the side of a meteor. Blackbird 1 lands on the large asteroid and out jumps Commander Cody with his crew of sixteen Elite Clonetroopers as well as Captain Rex and his squad of twelve Starship Troopers. The two teams split up and take cover within some craters. “Damn, these clankers look stronger than usual,” grumbles Commander Cody as twelve Terminators march their way. “Alright team, lets take ‘em out!” shout the clone Commander. The Elite Clonetroopers open fire on the Terminators, but they seem to only be inflicting minimal damage. The Terminators return fire, all carrying massive chain guns, mowing down Elite Clonetroopers #21, 24, 25, 33, and 36. Terminator #4 falls to Elite Clonetroopers #22 (Double Deuce) and 23, and Cody takes out Terminator #12 with an amazing headshot. Meanwhile the Captain Rex led Starship Troopers are being slaughtered by twelve Predators. Predator #2 killed Starship Troopers #51-57 by himself, knowing full well that this could be his final battle. The five remaining Troopers are simply overwhelmed by the Predators and are killed and skinned in a matter of seconds. Captain Rex manages to take out Predators #7 and 9 before Hancock swoops in and saves his ass. The Terminators continue their onslaught of the Clonetroopers and take down Elite Clonetroopers #27, 28, 29, 30, 34, and 35 with heavy gunfire. Captain America sends in some reinforcements to aid the Clonetroopers, as Cerberus, Iron Monger, Stryfe and Horri-Bull with Creb all jump and attack the Terminators. Cerberus’s three head all bite down on three Terminators, shaking them around violently like chew toys, killing Terminators #1-3. Iron Monger tries to use his heavy weaponry, but is having problems with ice build-up and is taken out by Terminators #8 and 9. Horri-Bull wildly attacks Terminators #5 and 7, killing them quickly, but also accidentally taking out Elite Clonetroopers #31 and 32 in the process. Stryfe then uses his telekinesis to rip Terminators #6, 9 and 10 apart, bolt-by-bolt. Before the two final Terminators fall they manage to take out the three Elite Clonetroopers that were still standing. Montross flies in where the Predators had killed the Starship Troopers and takes out Predators #1, 3, 7, and 12 with some cluster missiles. Deathlok then shoots him out of the sky. This attack doesn’t kill Montross, but only enrages him. Montross rushes towards Deathlok, but is blasted away by Deathlok’s plasma rifle. The Blues Brothers are both attacked and eaten by Zombies #1 and 2 who strangely resemble Carlos Olivera and Goblin #1. Skeletor then quickly uses his magic to vaporize the two walking corpses. Flash speeds in and takes out Phineas, Ferb and Perry with lightning fast ease, but the runs right into the waiting mouth of Kirby, who the swallows him whole. Naboo Soldier #1 in then all of a sudden shot by a powerful energy blast that come out of nowhere. Using his technology, Iron Man is able to see that eight remaining Predators have all activated their invisibility cloaks. He locks onto Predators #4 and 6 and blasts them with a repulsor ray. Mega Man and Cyborg Superman both are able to scan the area and see this as well. Mega Man kills Predator #11 with his Plasma Buster, and Cyborg Superman finds Predator #5 and rips his limbs right off of his body. Hancock then finds himself surrounded by Rob Van Dam and Sabu. “Aw, I’ve seen you guys. Ok, you want to wrestle? I’ll wrestle,” says Hancock. He suplexes Sabu into the asteroid and then clotheslines RVD. Hancock then puts Sabu into a Boston crab and pulls back until he tears the ECW Original’s legs clean off. He then quickly puts RVD in a cross face and breaks his neck. Abin Sur then sees Hal Jordan and engages him in battle. And after a fierce, but quick exchange, Hal Jordan comes out on top. With his dying words, Abin Sur says to Hal, “I always knew I had found the right person to take over my ring.” (It’s Abin Sur’s ring that Hal Jordan has. Which, yep, that means they were both fighting with the same ring. Don’t try and think about it too much, you eyes will start to bleed.) Raven is then attacked by Mephisto and is shown what true magic really feels like. Mephisto overpowers her and obliterates the Teen Titan. Batman then takes Blackbird 1 and flies right for Mephisto. He unloads all of its artillery on the demonic being, but he still stands. “Bruce, do not let him survive! No matter what!” shouts the distraught Robin(s). Batman then increases the speed and slams into Mephisto in a fiery explosion that takes all of them out in the process. Mega Man and Rush merge to form Jet Mega Man and rockets up to take on Loki and Bartleby. The two fallen angels are no match for Mega Man’s firepower and fall to the robot-boy. The Ben 10 Alien Force trio find themselves staring face to face with Abomination at this point. Kevin immediately turns himself into asteroid rock, in hopes to give him greater density and strength, but Abomination is too strong and smashes him into pebbles. Gwen tries to hit Abomination with some magic energy but, it doesn’t slow him down and he simply eats her in one bite. Ben then turns himself into Chromastone, which gives him the ability to absorb energy. He allows Abomination to beat on him for a bit and then redirects the energy back at Abomination in the form of an intense laser blast that burns a basketball sized hold through his chest. The two Ghost Riders ride in on their hellbikes and wrap their hellfire chains around Chromastone. They then launch him up into the air and Thanos overloads him with energy causing him to explode. The Abomitrons perform a similar act on Bishop who had been fighting back and forth with Starfire for quite a while. Iron Man and Cyborg Superman both fly in and along with Starfire, hits Bishop with more energy than he can handle and he too explodes from the overdose. Perched high up on a cliff on the asteroid, Deathlok takes aim and shoots Widget, destroying its circuitry. Buy what he doesn’t know is that he was tracked by Commander Cody and Captain Rex, who both sneak up behind him and shoot him point blank in the back of the head. Gray Hulk then leaps on top of Horri-Bull who is in his bull mode. The Decepticon tries to buck Gray Hulk off, but is unable to off seat him. Hulk grabs a hold of Horri-Bull’s horns and rips his head clean off. Gray Hulk then stomps Kreb into the ground. Skeletor sees that there is a baby running around this asteroid and would really enjoy killing him. He walks up to Baby Colossus, but is unexpectedly punched extremely hard by the little tyke. “No child strikes Skeletor and lives!” exclaims Skeletor. He then vaporizes Baby Colossus with a massive blast of evil magic. Suddenly Skeletor feels a large shadow beginning to loom over him, and as he slowly turns to see what it is, Cerberus gobbles him up and swallows the evil overlord. Kirby, using Flash’s power her acquired by eating him, is racing around the asteroid at top speeds, but is brought to a grinding halt by Predator #2 who launches a spear right into the pink puff ball. The two Ghost Riders start circling Commander Cody and Captain Rex, but Starfire flies in and blasts Danny Ketch. This allows the two Clonetroopers to double team Johnny Blaze and shoots him off of his hellbike. Cyborg Superman then targets the remaining Predators and flies straight through Predator #9. Predators #8 and 10 both become visible and try to blow Cyborg Superman out of the sky, but their weapons are no match for Hank Henshaw. He uses his heat vision to burn two small holes right through Predator #10’s helmet, and then using his super speed flies up and rips Predator #8’s head complete off of his shoulders. Predator #2 then leaps on to Hancock’s back and starts to try and claw away at him. Hancock flips him over and starts viciously landing punches to the Predator’s face. He then hears a beeping and realizes that the Predator has set his self-destruct bomb. “Aww s#^!,” says Hancock. He then grabs Predator #2 and whips him as hard and as fast as he can at Gray Hulk. As Gray Hulk turns to see what is flying his way, Predator #2’s thermo nuclear bomb goes off and sends both of them into oblivion. Green Lantern now sees himself in a very familiar situation, as he is one of two of the last surviving members of Better Than All of You. “Thanos, I’m going to be honest, I’ve been here before. This will not end well,” Hal Jordan says somberly. “Foolish human. I am Thanos, The Mad Titan. This team is not powerful enough to defeat me,” replies Thanos. They both then charge out and attack the remaining members of The Abomitrons with an amazing display of valor. Thanos vaporizes Commander Cody and Captain Rex with a blast of cosmic energy and crushes Mega Man and Rush with his bare hands. Green Lantern then euthanizes Cerberus with a vast amount of green energy. Iron Man then attacks Hal Jordan. They hit each other with everything they have, each exhausting the other. “I’m sorry I have to do this Hal. But I promised my team a win this week,” says Tony Stark as he relays all his power in his armor and then detonates a small nuclear bomb that kills both competitors. Thanos is then faced with the oncoming attack of Cyborg Superman, Hancock, Stryfe and Starfire. Stryfe uses his telepathy to distract Thanos, as Starfire blast him with her “starbolts,” and Cyborg Superman and Hancock fly in for the kill, using their sheer strength to defeat the Mad Titan.

THE ABOMITRONS ARE VICTORIOUS!