Le’ Napoleon Brigade is the Spice Girls
The Right Wing is Hector
Hector walks into the house that Tim built (Well not really) and notices a nice Canadian man surrounded by five over the top British woman. The man of course is Tim Cheveldae and he looks like a kid in a candy store. Hector stands in the doorway when Baby Spice (aka Emma Bunton) says, “Oh he’s cute, I want him”. Ginger Spice (aka Geri Halliwell) then looks over at Baby and laughs. “You aint what he wants Emma, he wants a real woman”. Emma looks back and says, “But I am a real woman now Geri, I’m in my thirties for god’s sake”. Scary Spice (aka Melanie Brown) looks at the both of them and says, “Please ladies, if he is interested in having a real woman, he’ll come to me.”
Posh Spice (aka Victoria Beckham) looks at Scary Spice and says, “Yeah, if he likes a woman that acts like a man”.
“What was that Vicky, what did you say? You are such a racist Vick.” Scary Spice says to Posh.
“I am not, all I said is that you act a bit more manly than the rest of us.” Posh says defensively back to Scary.
“I do not, I think you have the wrong Mel for that one” Scary screams back at Posh with.
“Hey, I have a boyfriend and a baby now. I’m not the manly one in the group anymore. Plus, why did you have to drag me into this, I don’t even care about him” a very hurt Sporty Spice (aka Melanie Chisholm) says back to sisters in arms.
“You’re not interested in him, well that’s a surprise,” Posh says to sporty.
“Hey, at least everyone doesn’t call me B*$#& Spice” Sport says back to Posh.
“Yeah, they just call you Lez Spice” Posh instantly says back.
“It could be worse, they could call you Old Spice like they do to Geri” Emma innocently says.
“Hey, how did I get brought back into this? I’m just interested in him,” Geri says referring to Hector.
“Oh that’s right, I forgot about Whore Spice too Geri. How many names do you have anyways?” Posh says to Geri.
“Oh I don’t know, probably the same number of woman your husband has slept this week while you have been gone.” Geri says back to Posh, who is now so angry that she is now standing up holding one of her three-inch heels that she has taken off of her foot.
“That’s it Geri, we should have never let you back in the group” Posh says.
“Now wait just a second Victoria, we all decided to let her back in. I mean, she is the whole reason we were a group anyways.” A very scared Baby Spice says to the irate Posh Spice.
“Oh shut up Emma, you are such a naïve fool still”. Scary Spice says, “You have never understood how big of b*#$@ Geri is”.
“I’m the bitch?” Geri says.
Hector looks at Tim and says, “Oh my god, are they ever going to stop talking”.
Tim says back, “Well, I figure at this point you could just let them kill each other and wait it out. I do have a case of Molson in the fridge.”
“That does sound amazing but I think I would just rather do this” Hector then takes his Energy Sword out of its sheath and one by one he stab’s them in the stomach. Well actually he stabs Scary, Ginger and Posh in the stomach because he thinks they deserve to die a painful death. He cut the heads off of Baby and Sporty, though he hated to do so because he kind of liked the Sporty one. He thought she would have been a worthy fighter and he also thought she was kind of cute. Though, after about forty five seconds of annoying moans and groans from the three remaining girls, Hector took his sword and loped their domes off as well.
Tim looked at Hector and said, “I’m kind of bummed that you had to do that. It’s not very often that I have a woman over here, let alone five of them.”
“Well for that I am sorry Tim, but do you know what can be more enjoyable then spending your time with five woman?
“What?
“Not spending your time with woman while drinking a case of Molson”. A very fulfilled Hector says as he walks towards the fridge and takes out two ice cold Molson Canadian’s. They both open their beers and take a drink.
“Couldn’t you have a least kept one of them alive, I mean I live in Canada, woman like that don’t just walk into the bar around here.”
“Tim, just shut up and drink your beer before I behead you as well”
“F-you Hector, F-you”
The Right Wing is Victorious!
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3 comments:
Awesome match. I was laughing just from reading the matchup.
But I agree with Tim. I would have left Sporty Spice alive just for fun.
She was always my favorite as well.
Hector was right all the way. Who needs women when you have beer.
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