Hannah vs the Taco Benders

"Yay, my parents are back together which exonerate's me from being the cause of their divorce" "Pop Superstar" Hannah Montana & "The Compassionate" President Barack Obama's "Best of Both World's" Touring Battalion of Commando's are: Dex-Star,, Karu-Sil, Fatality, Taa, Black Lantern Optimus Prime, Batzarro, Capatin Latin America, Cannon Man, The Bottomless Stomach & Kid-Nee, Ginny Weasly, Luna Lovegood, Spider-Man, Claire Danes, Lady Gaga, Jen Linley, Mrs. Doubtfire, Black Lantern Dozer #1, and Dozer #13

The Tijuana Taco Benders are: Stryker, Ripclaw, Ballistic, Heatwave, Charmeleon, Cole, Macron, Reece, Jinx, Gizmo, Mammoth, See-More, Private Hive, Sandworm #9, Sandworm #13, El Blanco, and The Revanchist

"Where is he? I gotta a bone to pick with that little f****r!" screams Jen Linley as the Commandos teleport to the desert.

"Whoa, whoa. Calm down Jen, tell me what the problem is. I'm a fellow teenage actor, I'm sure I can relate" says Claire Danes.

"F*** you. Mod Squad sucked, and your boobs looked weird in Shopgirl" hisses the pissed off Dawson's Creeker. "There he is. Hey! Black lantern Dozer!. What the f*** man? Why'd you kill me last week you a*****e?"

"Oh. Was that you? Sorry. I wasn't paying attention to what was going on" shrugs the black lantern Dozer.

"WHAT!" roars Jen "How could you NOT pay attention to what's been going on with me? I thought you, me and BL Prime were like a team. Three lovable ruffians who overcome all odds to hilariously win the day for our team? I..." Jens lowers her voice "I let you play with my boobies!"

"Yeah, and that was way cool of you, it was." begins BL Dozer #1 "But maybe the best time to pull the funbags out to play isn't during a battle on the Playoff Planet. Between an awesome set of jugs and the possibility yo kill a whole bunch of people, I kinda lost my head. I'm sorry"

"Is this really the best time for this?" asks Claire Danes "I mean, this whole conversation seems very inappropriate"

No sooner are the words out of Danes' mouth then the vile, despicable Dozer tears hers heart out, then spits on her corpse

"Screw you" he says "You don't talk to my #1 b***h like that. We got stuff we're working on over here"

"Aww" says Jen "Am I really your #1 b***h?"

"You know it doll" says the black lantern, as he starts to blush "Now calm down, we got us a fight to win and I don't need you getting all wet out in the desert. Yet"

"You got it babe, but later..." Jen winks

"You know it." smiles BL Dozer #1 "Now where's Prime? We got some s**t to do"

"Guys. Guys." roars black lantern Prime "You gotta see this. I told Gaga we were probably gonna fight some Sandworms so the idiot wrapped herself in tan fabric and is trying to burrow in the sand to 'be one with the sandy little monsters' it's HILARIOUS!"

"Dude, that's awesome." says bl Dozer #1 "Oh, hey guys. What's up?" the three musketeers of the depraved finally notice that the rest of their team is standing behind them, and has heard and seen everything-including the brutal murder of Claire Danes.


"Batzarro hates you all!" says Batzarro "Batzarro no want be part of group. Batzarro be different from you all."

"You guys did just see Lady Gaga eaten by El Blanco right?" says Dozer #13 "I mean, what the hell is all of this? This has nothing to do with fighting the Taco Benders"

"Why don't you go pick Gaga out of his teeth?" says Jen as she picks up the mouthy little Dozer and throws him over the dunes to a blood spattered bit of sand where Gaga was last seen being weird as usual. "Sorry babe, was that a hate crime?" Jen says to her black lantern lover

"Nah, I knew that guy, he sucked." says black lantern Dozer #1 "Now. Onto business. How's about we see exactly what's going on on the other si-" suddenly BL Dozer #1 is his by a fireball and set ablaze. He burns to a crisp, but is reformed by his ring.

"Dammit. That hurt. Was that..yeah, it was that Charmeleon. Someone should do something about that."

"I'm on it" says black lantern Prime who picks up Mrs Doubtfire and throws him at the Charmeleon. Mrs Doubtfire lands on the sand in front of the fiery Pokemon and has no need to doubt the validity of fire coming from the Taco Benders, as he is promptly set ablaze by the Pokemon and Heatwave.

"Ok. So we know they have alot of fire over there." says BL Prime. "What else can we throw at them?"

"Oh. Oh. Throw Kid-Nee." squeals Jen "He looks like he'd burn good

"Oh for god's sake" says Spider-Man "I'll be right back" and he begins to run over the sand dunes

"Hey dummy!" yells bl Dozer #1 "Maybe running over sand dunes isn't the best of ideas when there's sandworms? You can't really web sling with no buildings around!"

"My spider sense will protect..." begins Spider-Man but then the massive jaws of sandworm #9 consume him whole.

"This is ridiculous" says Karu-Sil "I'm putting and end to this farce. C'mon everyone with a ring. Follow me." and with that she and Taa fly above the desert and create a giant sifter which they use to separate the sandworms and El Blanco from their hiding place beneath the desert floor. After that Dex-Star sets them all ablaze with the crimson red vomit fire from his red lantern ring.

"Now for the rest of the Taco Benders" says Taa and throws the giant, flaming corpses at the Taco Benders setting most of them ablaze

"Ha. What about Heatwave and Charmeleon? How are they gonna burn?" sneers Jen

"Captain Latin America to the rescue!" says Captain Latin America (obviously) "Come one Commandos. Battle, ho!" and he rushes forward with Cannonman, only to be killed by Heatwave and Charmeleon in their ferocious last stand.


"Did he call me a hoe?" asks Jen

"Who cares?" says black lantern Prime "Here let's get outta here and get some Denny's. The rest of the team got this." and he transforms into a truck. Jen, BL Dozer #1 and Batzarro get in an depart the desert leaving their team to finish off the two fiery Taco Benders.

"What the hell? Where are they going?" screams Karu-Sil as Ginny Weasly and Luna Lovegood are set ablaze by Heatwave.

"Just let them go, they're nothing but a distraction" Taa replies as he wills a giants fire extinguisher onto the field putting out the flaming bodies of the two young wizards and extinguishes the fire of Charmeleon.

"This has been the weirdest match I've ever been in" proclaims Fatality as she simultaneously beheads the Charmeleon and cause Heatwaves fuel pack to explode-killing him, but isn't quick enough to save The Bottomless Stomach or Kid-Nee. As they are killed in the explosion as well.

"Well, I guess a wins a win" says Karu-Sil. "But we suffered way more casualties than we should have."

"Meow. Rrrow." says Dex-Star sagely, and with that the Commandos leave the battle field victorious.


The Tijuana Taco Benders: All Dead



"Pop Superstar" Hannah Montana & President Barack Obama's "Best of Both World's" Touring Battalion of Commando's: Karu-Sil, Taa, Fatality, Dex-Star, Black Lantern Optimus Prime, Black Lantern Dozer #1, Batzarro, And Jen Linley survive.









'POP SUPERSTAR" HANNAH MONTANA AND PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA'S "BEST OF BOTH WORLDS" TOURING BATTALION OF COMMANDO'S ARE VICTORIOUS!!!