This is the Ocho, my name is Cotton, and THIS is your week two Fantasy Fantasy League wrap up. Let's get to it.
We start with our "Match of the Week" Layander's Super Orange Kitties and Cats Living Together to make a New Family vs Beckerman's Backyardigan Beeyatches had a pulse pounding, high octane face off that saw a very game Orange Kitties really take the fight to the former FFL Champions B3. But, sole survivor Wolverine really put on a clinic this week, showing why B3 is 2-0 this season. Hella of a contest and a hard fought win for the Beeyatches.
Another big story this week is the emergence of white power this week, as we saw the FFL debuts of White Lantern Hal Jordan for "The Brotherhood of Evil Midgets", White Lantern Sinestro for "The Horsemen of Apokolips", and White Lantern Batman starting for " Layander's Super Orange Kitties and Cats Living Together to make a New Family". It's looking like having former experience ring slinging really helps one utilizing this weapon, as both Hal and Sinestro found themselves not only on the winning side, but surviving the match up, while Batman found death and defeat.
This leads into our final segment for the week. Controversy abounded this week following the Midgets/Transfoamers match up, as White Lantern Hal Jordan revived fallen teammate Joey Potter to "protect the sanctity of life". This lead to speculation between watchers that this could lead to a possible new, unplanned addition to the Midgets, throwing commissioner Ryan Poteracki into a fit. "Unauthorized breeding between teammates is strictly prohibited" said the harried Commish "Not only with any "surprise" pregnancies be deemed ineligible for play but heavy, HEAVY penalties will be given to ANY team found 'Breeding for the Bowl' " This could make White Lantern Hal Jordan as possible liability for the Midgets, as Hal Jordan displays not only a callous disregard for authority figures, but testosterone walking as his sexual exploits as not only well know, but some are stuff of legend.
That'll do it for us. Again, I'm Cotton McKnight, thanks for watching "Spoiler Sport". Keep it locked in here to "The Ocho" as week three's Fantasy Fantasy League play in the desert gets ready to kick off later this week.
Thank you and good night.
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17 comments:
Thanks Cotton, great stuff as usual.
As for the unwanted breeding, I had no idea the commish was so conservative. Maybe I should just start referring to the FFL as the RCC or as it should be known as, The Roman Catholic Church.
Conservative my ass.
I fully encourage as much promiscuity in the locker rooms.
However, breeding cannot be allowed to happen as it would greatly affect roster limits and could jeopardize the very existence of this League on scales that most can't even fathom.
It's an unfortunate thing. But a necessary one.
F'n A Cotton... F'n A
Life finds a way Ryan.
Life Finds a way.
...
Wow, I can't believe it took this long for a Jurassic Park line to come out.
Still.... Not gonna happen. Sorry.
Great stuff Cotton!! This is becoming one of my favorite things to read on the whole blog. Gotta stick to your guns Commish, haters gonna hate. Oh... And since when is The Roman Catholic Church against breeding????
Everytime my wife breeds, the offspring get added to your roster. What difference does it make if it is human, superhero or robot? I think children should be allowed AND encouraged.
Discuss.
-Z
Are they available to draft, or are they just added on? if its the latter, i have a lot of work to do. "How much for the women? The children, how much for the children?"- Jake Blues
Stirrin the pot... I love it!!
Characters like Ella & Jack Artrip, Charlie Lynn, Anna & Lucas Pilkinton, & James Sroka are one thing because, well it's fun to have all of us "real people" in the matches.
We will not being creating new characters from already existing characters, such as Hal Jordan & Pacey Potter. This case is closed. Sorry. Sure it's a interesting idea, but it's way too big of a can of worms. Just like with the previous administration, all new character creations are subject to the approval of the Commissioner. With this topic, the answer is no. Sorry.
You just created a new character right here in the comments. There's no such thing as Pacey Potter. It's JOEY Potter.
I'm so embarassed for you right now.
Haha. Yep you are right. My fault. No need to be embarrassed though. And no creation was made, just a simple mispoken name. But at least I know what the names of all of our wonderful team owners are. Mistakes are acceptable. Ignorance isn't.
I'm not going to dignify that with a response since I'm 70% sure I do know who owns what team now.
Transfoamers are owned by Roger, right? That sounds right to me.
Well said, Charles! You show commissioner Richard whos boss!
Thanks, Mike.
Amazo and Ion have both been executed outside of their respected locker rooms as punishment for both of their owners disregard for authority.
Don't fuck with me.
Hahaha. Nah, I'm just messing with you. Amazon and Ion are fine.
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