Season 5 week 7- The Commandos vs The Tijuana Taco Benders

Miley "Doesn't my collarbone look sexy!" Cyrus & President Barack "Forward" Obama's "Best of Both World's" Touring Battalion of Commandos team are
Earth 2 Superman
Kingdom Come Superman
Leon the Professional w/despotellis' yellow ring
Katniss Everdeen w/green lantern ring
Jack Crowe w/red light saber
Luminara Unduli w/blue lantern ring
Barress Offee
Movie Jetfire w/Indigo ring
Carslie Cullen w/Star Sapphire ring
Norma Cenva w/green lantern ring
The Captain (Immell #5: Captain America mixed with Steve Yzerman) w/Captain Amercia's Shield
White Lantern Deadman
Black Lantern Neo
Heimdall
The Atom
Zombie Wonder Girl
Dr. Fate
Jen Linley
Doozer #13

Tijuana Taco Benders are
Technet Team: Body Bag, China Doll, Elmo, Ferro, Ferro 2, Joyboy, Numbers, Ring Toss, Scatterbrain, Thug, Waxworks, Yap, and Hard-Boiled
Reavers: Donald Pierce, Pretty Boy, Bonebreaker, Skullbuster, Cole, Macon, and Reece
Lady Deathstrike
Deadpool Team: Kid Deadpool, Lady Deadpool, Kidpool, and Dogpool
Watchdog’s #2 - #10
Rohrim #1 - #6
Decepticon Decoy #1 - #5
HIVE Academy:Jinx, Gizmo,Mammoth, See-More, and Private Hive
Junkeon #15 and #16 – 40
Force Adept #6 – 15


Ffffffuuuuuuu-. My achin' head. Ow. And ass. My achin' ass. Christ, arrggghh. What the hell happened?

I remember, I remember 'porting in to Vegas. I remember the fight starting at the casino. The blonde. I remember the blonde coming up and offering me a drink Then, just flashes.


God, I need aspirin. Why does my ass hurt so bad? What did I do?

Ok, focus. Had the drink. What happened while I had the drink with the blonde? The old men! I remember the old men fighting those weird alien dudes. Tech-something? I know the green one tried eating one, but puked him up and said something about his costume being synthetic? Is that right? I know then they weird guy with the arms kept touching the King Coming Super-Man? Was that old dude a pornstar? I know the other old dude was caught in some rings while he was out. There was talk of Elmo, Numbers, and Hard-Boiled already being killed by the porn guy and then some little person flew in his head and exploded his brain?

That just sounds stupid. Is that right?  DAMN! What happened to my ass? God, it feels like my iintestines are on fire.

What else? After the porno dude died, the other old guy woke up, got pissed and f**kin' wrecked everyone else in the Techs. Then me and the blonde staggered off, she got me another drink and laughed about "All that gore being so-so hot!"

What else? That black dude Neo! I kinda remember him just trashing some guys the Rovers? And some robot guys.  That one robot who had a goofy staff helped Neo.

The chick with the nails! She was badass! Wasn't she? She killed a dude with a lightsaber, a dude with a pink ring and that zombie. Wait, she was a zombie? Then there was a yellow blast from nowhere and she was just ashes.

Those goofs in the matching pajamas kept saying something? What was it? "Did we really think we had a chance?"  "He's watching his two favorite, stupid characters. We're beyond f**ked"

The hell?

Ugh I gotta puke.

The pajama gang took out a captain? And they went after  this other dude who's jammies looked like theirs, but his had a creepy white mask. He fired a white beam as he died. Then, wait. The pornstar came back! But he died? He couldn't have? He was pissed and just went crazy. He took out the pajama gang and some Rohr-?

I dunno. I just know I'm gonna be si-.

Wait.

What was that? A toilet flush? Who's here with me?

"Hey, lover. How'd you sleep?"

The blonde!

"Uh, hey...beautiful." Smooth cover "What you up to?"

"Oh, just cleaning up after last night, we had quite the time."

Holy. S**t. Is she hot. Make this happen dude. hit her with the best you got.

"Ready for more?" Come on, nut up. Ignore the pain in your guts, and get your nut, then leave.

"Oh, sorry sexy. I'm about through with you, we got a match to win"

What? "What?"

suddenly The Atom bursts through Watchdog #8's chest like a chestburster from 'Aliens'

"Christ, Jen!" he exclaims "Did I really have to go in through his butthole? You're a freak!"

"Shut up. You loved it. You're dirty, you're a dirty, dirty boy." purrs Jen Linley "And now that you've been inside him, how about getting inside me."

"What about the match?" smirks the Atom as he unbuckles his shape changing belt

"What's left to say? We have two Supermen, Dr Fate, and a bunch of colored rings.  We may lose a few more guys, but I'm sure we'll be fine."

"But, but" stammers The Atom.

"Baby. This team is about to go seven and oh. Now get over here and make me got oh seven times." the temptress from the Creek urges.

"Yes, ma'am!" exclaims the Atom as he and Jen collapse onto the bed as the match rages on outside. Dr Fate screams in agony as he is killed by the Force adepts, while Jen and the Atom scream in excstacy ignorant to the battle raging outside them.

Jen and the Atom finally fall to the ground- exhausted as the final Taco Bender, Mammoth, is killed by Katniss Everdeen's green ring.

Jen gets up and surveys the carnage outside. Spotting black lantern Neo. She smiles to herself "Hmmm. I hear Joey hooked up with some white guy earlier this year. Maybe I'll have to show her why once you go black, you never go back" and the teen sexual predator begins to stalk her next victim.