Saturday, November 5, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXXVI

Huber Street and Mt. Elliott. . .

Lex Luthor methodically scans the street for his enemy.  He has broken away from his teammates, knowing that he must face this combatant alone.  Brains against brains; the fight is about to commence.
Luthor:  Show yourself!

An Iron Man suit soars to the scene.  George Washington lands with his green lightsaber ignited.
Luthor:  You may have been a mastermind for your time, Colonial, but this day and age is mine.

Washington:  I may be old, but I still wait to fire until I see the white of my enemy’s eyes. 
A charge is heard and Washington fires his pulse rays at Luthor.  The ground explodes around the criminal mastermind, who barely escapes the first skirmish.  Luthor slowly rises and whips a finger in the air, signaling his teammate. Agent Smith flies across the street and smashes Washington into the ground.  Smith manages to rip the lightsaber from Washington’s hand and throws it across the way.  Smith throws Washington to the ground and comes face to face with the Slaves’ Head Coach.

Smith:  Time to die, wigged one.
As Smith is about to rip off the helmet of Washington, he screams and his hands whip to his head.

Kid Omega uses his telekinetic powers to begin ripping Agent Smith apart.  Smith turns and walks into the sonic blast of Omega.  Smith explodes and the Matrix agent fades to pixellated nothingness.
Kid Omega lifts Washington up from the street.    Luthor stands his ground.

Luthor:  You may strike me down, but . . .
Luthor is unable to finish his words as Washington and Kid Omega blast Luthor together.  Luthor crumples to the ground, dead.

Sunday, October 30, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXXV

Greektown. . .

Darth Shemalyah, Nik Landsoh and Brek Nyram land on the roof where both Batman and Old Man Logan are standing.  Darth Shemalyah cackles.
Darth Shemalyah:  You dare think that you could take out the great Darth Shemalyah with a trinket such as the one contained in your hand.  Foolish mortal.

Both Landsoh and Nyram ignite their red lightsabers.  Old Man Logan scrapes his adamantium claws together in response.
Darth Shemalyah:  Nik and Brek, take the old man.  I will handle the Highness Head Coach.

Both Landsoh and Nyram in unison:  As you wish, my master.
Batman fires his weapon at Shemalyah.  The Sith Lord’s blade deflects the beam, but the intensity is raised as Batman turns a knob on the weapon.  An explosion occurs and a large portion of the building in which the five stand shatters.  Shemalyah looks in shock as she begins to fall with the concrete beneath her feet.

Landsoh: Master!!!

 

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXXIV

Avery and Brainard Street. . .

Robin and Batman Beyond run toward the beacon call of their teammates.  They are about to turn the corner of Avery and Brainard when they are met by Ki Adi Mundi.
Mundi:  You are formidable adversaries, there is no doubt.  You lack though the skills necessary to wield the lightsaber to its fullest capacity.

Mundi ignites his blade and he confronts the Highness duo.  The trio dance with their lightsabers and feet, thrusting and parrying in uncanny precision. 
Robin:  Flank left!

Batman Beyond follows the instruction of his brother-in-arms.  Robin takes the right side of Mundi, while Robin matches against his foe on the left.  The Cerean Jedi Master still gains the upper hand although seemingly outmatched by two adversaries. 
Stewie Griffin: What the duce!?!?

Griffin launches a barrage of green projectiles from this green lantern ring.  Both Robin and Batman Beyond are battered with the missiles, allowing Mundi to react to his friend’s assistance.  Mundi launches himself in a twirling spin and cuts into both Robin and Batman Beyond.  The two Highness fighters fall to the ground, their legs slashed apart.
Griffin:  Let me finish them Ki!  Let me finish them!

Ki Adi Mundi bows to the toddler.  Stewie lands on the ground.  He readies his ring for a final blow, his defenses and green protective sheathing down.
Batman Beyond throws his ignited lightsaber at Stewie Griffin.  The lightsaber breaches the skull of Griffin, who drops to the street below.

Mundi hollers at the death of his little friend and kills both Robin and Batman Beyond, who are unable to avoid the blows due to their wounds.

Saturday, October 29, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXXIII

Beard Street and Lisbon. . .

The Fantastic Four face Ymir and the Genie.  Sandman comes to the scene.
Sandman:  Can I join in?

Human Torch:  From Frightful Four to Fantastic Five; step right in.
Ymir sees the fifth member of the Royal Highness ready to join the fray.

Ymir:  I don’t think so!
Ymir freezes Sandman is place.  The Genie flies to his enemy and snaps his fingers.  Sandman shatters in hundreds of frozen pieces; dead.

The Thing approaches Ymir in his Anti-Galactus suit.  The two begin to pummel one another.  Meanwhile, Reed Richards tinkers with his ultimate nullifier. He looks up, having accomplished his task and fires at the Genie. The blue behemoth screams and is ripped apart.  Reed Richards looks to his wife.
Richards:  Sue!  I need you to assist Ben! 

There is a glazed look on the Invisible Woman’s face.
Richards:  Sue!  Sue, I need to to help Ben!

The Invisible Woman looks to Reed with a look of both pain and regret.
Richards:  Sue?

Loki materializes and is seen pulling a spear from the Invisible Woman’s back.  The Invisible Woman falls to the ground.
Human Torch:  No!!!

The Human Torch instantly reacts and begins to shoot mountains of flame at the Asgardian.  Loki smiles as he waves off the fire and becomes invisible.
Ymir ultimately is able to topple the Thing in his protective suit.  Ymir, nonetheless, freezes it in place.  The Thing jumps out of the suit.

The Thing:  Don’t need a suit to take you on, giant!
Ymir launches a frosty attack on the rocky hero.  Ymir manages to freeze his enemy, as he did before.  This time, Loki in the Genie’s place and stead, smashes their team’s foe into pieces.  Pebbles remain where the Thing once stood.

Richards and the Torch combine their forces against the frost giant.  The Human Torch unleashes a fury of subatomic, sun-like blasts.  Ymir bellows and looks to Richards.  Richards lowers the nullifier after a few additional adjustments are made.
Richards:  This is for Sue and Ben.

Richards fires his weapon and Ymir is blasted apart.  Loki stands hidden and slowly walks away from the scene, hoping to regroup with his team in an attempt to annihilate the remaining two.

Friday, October 28, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXXII

St. Antoine and E. Lafayette. . . Greektown

The weapon’s beam rushes from the chamber.  Batman whispers to himself, noting that although fired, his apparatus did not directly find its mark.  The projectile streams at the enemy trio.  Darth Shemalyah notices the glint in Batman’s location even before his is able to fire his weapon and grips her Sith lavarok, which suddenly becomes hard in her hand.  The beam shatters the staff.  The Sith Lord points to the opponent’s location and her acolytes immediately ignite their red lightsabers and stand before their master.
Batman:  Damn.

Old Man Logan:  More than damn, Batman.  Look!
Shemalyah raises both of her arms and carries herself along with Brek Nyram and Nik Landsoh in the air, using the Force.  They are readying themselves against the Royal Highness duo.

Old Man Logan:  We need to leave.  Now!
Batman:  We need to make a stand.  This weapon is our only chance against her!  We are not leaving!

Old Man Logan unsheathes his claws.
Old Man Logan:  Okay, bub.  We’re not leaving.

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXXI

Avery and Calumet Street. . .

Crocodile Dundee ignites Darth Nihilus’ red lightsaber.  He stands ready for his enemy.  Robin (Jason Todd) ignites his blue lightsaber.

Todd:  Ready, old man.

Dundee:  Crikey!  Gonna’ teach ya’ to respect ya’ eldahs!

As the two begin a dance with their lightsabers, Tony the Tiger faces Elderly Bruce Wayne.  The immense feline lashes out at the old man, who manages to dodge certain death in the form of Tony’s claws.  Tony gnashes his teeth and Wayne begins to run away, thinking of a strategy to take down the cat.  As he turns a corner he runs into an immense web construct. Bruce Wayne is caught.

Doppleganger:  My, my, I’ve caught a fly.

Wayne lights the mini torch in his gloves and begins to cut the webbing.  He is almost free when Doppleganger reaches the man.  Doppleganger holds Wayne’s head between his hands.

Doppleganger:  Only one way to win this battle. . . you’ve got to get ahead of the game.

With his ironic musing, Doppleganger rips Elderly Bruce Wayne’s head off and throws it to his growling teammate.  Tony begins to tear into the skull of Wayne.  Doppleganger jumps to the ground and before he can join his brother-in-arms, a blinking pod clings to his leg.  Doppleganger looks down and then looks up.  Batman Beyond waves at his enemy.  The blinking ceases and click is heard.  Doppleganger is decimated as the bomb explodes.  Tony the Tiger bathes in the blood and becomes frenzied.  Batman Beyond skirts away and notices his teammate still battling the enemy.

Todd continues to fight Dundee.  Although a master acrobatic wonder, Todd is unable to gain the upper hand and the Aussie holds his own.  As the duo’s clashing sabers echo throughout the area, Dundee screams.  He twists his head to see a bat-a-rang embedded in his back.  Batman Beyond waves.  The distraction is effective and Todd cuts Dundee in half.  Batman Beyond reaches for the lightsaber.  The futuristic Batman and second Robin face Tony the Tiger.  The Tiger leaps onto Batman Beyond as he attempts to maul the caped crusader, he is met by both lightsabers.  Tony is mortally wounded, his tongue falling from his jaw and a final spasm is seen as his last breath is completed. 

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXX

St. Antoine and E. Lafayette. . . Greektown

Atop the casino, Batman is prone, holding his weapon.  Old Man Logan watches his head coach focus on the targets.

Old Man Logan:  Are you sure this is going to work?

Batman:  My deductive skills have confirmed that we have no other choice.  Even their Sith abilities will fail to realize they are within my sights before it is too late; that is the power of the crystal and the weapon. 

Old Man Logan does not respond; he simply grins. 

Batman locates Darth Shemalyah, Nik Landsoh and Brek Nyram on the street area below.  He breathes in.  He firmly places his finger on the trigger.  He releases his breath and fires.

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXIX

Beard Street and Lisbon. . .

The Wicked Witch of the West swings her devil lance while the Genie cackles hysterically.

Genie:  We’re going to kick some serious butt, you and I.  A witch.  A genie.  What chance does anyone have against the two of us?

Jadis:  I’d say a pretty good chance, fool.

W3 and the Genie look to see Jadis the White Witch standing with Morgan LeFey, who is holding Voldemort’s wand at the ready.  Both W3 and the Genie take to the air, W3 on her broom, hoping to gain an expected advantage by using their abilities to fly.  W3 uses her devil lance to come down on LeFey, who blocks the weapon with a spell.  The Genie lands and morphs into a blue polar bear, standing before Jadis.

Genie:  Bet you’re not used to your bears blue!

Genie races toward her and is struck by a spell.  The blue ursus shrugs the casting without much trouble.

LeFey shouts to Jadis: Looks like they’re going to be more trouble than we thought!  Switch up! 

Jadis then begins to battle W3, while the Genie fights against LeFey.  Jadis swirls her hands above her head and a storming cloud of snow surrounds its master.  The White Witch flicks her spell above W3, who is still flying on her broom.  LeFey sees her sister’s frozen cloud looming above W3 and casts another spell.  The icy weather becomes a streaming mound of water, swallowing W3 within.  W3 screams.  She begins to melt and her broom smashes against the ground, riderless now as W3 perishes.

The Genie morphs into a blue monstrosity, looking to crush and disembowel both Jadis and LeFey.  The two manage to miraculously fight Genie to a standstill.

LeFey:  Why has the air gotten colder.

Jadis:  That’s not me. . .

Ymir rushes to the scene.

Ymir: Correct, that is me.

The frost giant freezes the air around LeFey, who is unable to elicit a spell from either her mouth, or Voldemort’s wand, as the world around her is now subzero temperature.  LeFey’s skin begins to freeze and turn black.  She whispers a small scream as she falls to the ground.  LeFey’s eyes turn glassy and her body is heard cracking as she hits the street.

Jadis:  Giant, I am in my element now!

Ymir:  You may be in your element, but I. AM. THE. ELEMENT.

Ymir and Jadis fight for only a short time before the Genie enters the skirmish.  The Genie and Ymir are too much for Jadis, who is eventually killed by the duo.

The Fantastic Four come to the scene, looking at the giants, one of white, one of blue, looming above.

The Thing: It’s clobberin’ time!

Monday, October 24, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXVIII

South Street and South Waterman. . .

Wedge Antilles continues to soar above the steel monstrosities in the city region in his hobbled Resistance X-Wing. He targets his enemy’s remaining ship.  Taking a strafing run, Wedge repeatedly fires upon the Alliance Medical Frigate.  Explosions are seen across the ship.  A green blur is seen shooting out of the ship.  Mike Greenwell barely escapes sure death by using his green lantern ring.  He tosses the pump away from his nether region and pulls up his pants.

Greenwell:  Now I’m ready!

Greenwell focuses on the interrupter of pleasure and flies toward Wedge.  Wedge easily careens out of Greenwell’s path and fires upon the Highness General Manager. 

Greenwell:  Good try, Antilles, but not good enough!

Greenwell is about to attack the fighter when suddenly he is ripped from the sky and hurtled to the ground.  Greenwell crashes at the feet of Xorn.  Greenwell shrugs off the dizziness and ignites his lightsaber.  Xorn utilizes both his magnetism and electrical manipulation abilities and rips into Greenwell.  Greenwell screams in agony.  Xorn then creates a black hole from his sun, swallowing Greenwell.  As Greenwell is sucked into nothingness and his death, he shouts!

Greenwell:  I shall have my revenge, mother#%ker!  I shall have my revenge!!!

Xorn picks up the green lantern ring and green lightsaber held by his fallen enemy.  He places the ring on his finger and ignites the lightsaber.  Xorn smiles to himself.  The mutant turns, only to be pummeled by Ronan the Accuser.  A battle ensues as the two titans fight against one another.  Ronan gains the upper hand, when suddenly Xorn is taken by surprise and is torn apart by Molecule Man.

With the death of Xorn, Molecule Man and Ronan look for other game and notice the X-Wing above.  It is only a matter of moments before Wedge Antilles and his ship become a ball of metal and flesh combined.  R5-D4 screams as it and its master are destroyed.  With the death of Xorn, Molecule Man and Ronan look for other game

Sunday, October 23, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXVII

Campus Marcellus. . .

Morgan Le Fey and Jadis the White Witch walk aboard the Alliance Medical Frigate, which is currently stationed on the ground.

Le Fey:  We need to obtain the necessary supplies so we can treat immediately – both through magic and medicine.

Jadis:  Where is the storage space?

Le Fey:  Right through this door.

The door opens and the two women’s jaws drop.  They see their General Manager, sans pants, near an apparatus.

Greenwell:  Oh sh#t!  Hey, gals.  I was just testing the pump out.  Making sure everything was in order in triage.

Jadis:  You were testing the pump. . . with your penis?

Greenwell:  What other way is there to test a pump?

The two women shake their heads and walk from the room, disgusted.

Greenwell:  What!?!?  I was just testing the pump!!!  What’s wrong with that!?!?

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXVI

Middle Street and Clifford Street. . .
    
Each team devises a strategy tailored to the strengths of their surviving rosters. The combatants move together in specific hordes and scatter throughout the city’s landscape.
Zorro and King Richard slowly traipse down an alleyway.  Richard draws his sword from the scabbard hitched to his belt, while Zorro ignites his blue lightsaber. 

King Richard:  I doth look for a skirmish to imbed my blade!

Zorro:  As do I, amigo.

Batgirl and Kid Omega jump off of a ledge above.

Batgirl: You have your wish. . . you mean hombres!

Batgirl throws a bat-a-rang that is swatted away by Zorro’s blade.  Kid Omega unleashes a psionic blast at King Richard, throwing the monarch across the way and into a pile of trash.

Kid Omega:  That’s where all Kings belong - in the trash.

King Richard slowly rises from the rubbish, a bit discombobulated.

King Richard raises his sword again.

King Richard: Beast!  How dare you!  I am King Richard!  I have conquered your metal birds by flying through the clouds in battle!  I have ruled kingdoms!  I have. . .

Kid Omega creates his psionic shotgun and blasts King Richard, causing a gaping hole through his chest.  Kid Omega walks to the body of his enemy.

Kid Omega: . . . just cr#pped your pants, you dead a$$hole.

Meanwhile, Batgirl and Zorro fight one another, neither gaining the upper hand. 

Batgirl:  Could use a little help here.

Kid Omega:  You sure?

Batgirl:  I’m sure.

Kid Omega: My pleasure.  Formation alpha five.

Batgirl reacts and does a backflip, kicking her feet outward and catching Zorro in the face.  A stunned Zorro loses his lightsaber and is then blasted by Kid Omega.  Zorro falls to the ground, dead.

Batgirl:  Thanks for the assist.

Kid Omega mockingly bows as one would to royalty.  The two laugh.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXV


The spellbinding light ceases to exist.  As the light is extinguished, from its essence rises the entire Royal Highness and George Washington’s Slaves teams.  Although separated, all have been transported to the Detroitia Sector of the City Region.
Royal Highness. . .

Mike Greenwell looks to his teammates.
Greenwell: Damn straight!  I be where I belong!!!

Mogan LeFey turns to Lex Luthor.
LeFey: What is he babbling about?

Luthor:  Greenwell was raised in the area near the Earth city known as Detroit.  Rumor has it that he was actually raised on the mean streets and knows them well. 
Batman Beyond: . . . and I thought Gotham was dirty.

Greenwell: Nothing more fun that getting down and dirty with Greenie on his simulated home turf!  Let’s party boys and girls!

Slaves. . .

Crocodile Dundee: Crikey!  This place smells like the underbelly of a croc!
Tony the Tiger:  Smell means nothing.  Blood means everything.

Wicked Witch of the West:  Ooooh.  Blood.  There’s nothing I’d rather bathe in than the blood of our enemy.
Washington:  You will have your chance Triple W.  You will have your chance.

UNIVERSE BOWL IX: CHAPTER XXXIV


           A bright light engulfs the inhabitants of the Playoff Planet.  The combatants feel their bodies tremble as the teleportation of their essences is about to commence. 
*   *   *
           Old Man Logan looks down at his shimmering body.  Batman smiles at his friend, knowing that his plan is on the precipice of coming to fruition. 

*   *   *
            Darth Shemalyah looks at her teammates who currently stand beside her, including her trusted apprentices, Nik Landsoh and Brek Nyram.  George Washington’s armor glimmers in the light which envelopes his compatriots.  Shemalyah whispers to her acolytes.

Darth Shemalyah: Just. . . .
*   *   *
Batman: . . . as. . .
*   *   *
Darth Shemalyah: . . . I’ve. . . .
*   *   *
Batman: . . . planned.

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Universe Bowl IX: Chapter XXXIII

As Thunderclash approaches the Nova-structure, he releases his passengers Jor-El and Wolverine onto a small asteroid outcropping, where they believe they can gain access to their enemies. They are certain that once Thunderclash begins the battle with his opening attack, that they are banking on being significant, that they will be able make a difference inside. But perhaps all of that is unnecessary. Every person on George Washington's Slaves is hoping that maybe, just maybe this entire battle won't have to be executed completely; and that Thunderclash along with the Autobot leaders of old can make it happen.

“Come on guys, this isn't really gonna work, is it”?? Asks Dak over the comlink.

“I've seen this thing in action guys, in Season 2. And it really is incredible. I just don't know if this guy has the same touch that Optimus had back then........ WAIT. WAIT A SECOND. FALL BACK, This isn't going to work. ALL CRAFT FALL BACK”. Exclaims Wedge to his teammates.

“What's your malfunction Wedge?? Thunderclash is going to open the Autobot Matrix of Leadership and then we are going to follow in the firestorm and win this thing” You're the only person here who has seen the Matrix in action, Why the hell would you be the skeptic all the sudden”?? Asks Maverick authoritatively.

As this conversation begins and continues, Thunderclash is floating before the structure, opening up his chest plate and pulling out the Autobot Matrix of Leadership, so he can “Light their Darkest Hour” like some of the once great, passed on Autobot leaders of the past have done. Thunderclash pulls the object out of his chest and begins to raise it up. But Meanwhile:

As the stunt fighters circle back into their original formation, Wedge speaks: “Listen up guys, I can't believe I didn't think of it before. I'm not the only one here who was there on that fateful day against the Commandos when the Matrix was opened”.

“What are you talking about Wedge?? I've done my research. That was Season 2, hardly anybody was actually in the league back then; and is still around on this team today. Not to mention that even less, lived through that epic battle”. Says Poe.

Wedge answers: “They aren't on the team anymore. But back in the Conference Finals when we were saved by the Matrix, it wasn't Optimus Prime that opened it up. Optimus was taken out by Titan Cymeks before he could do it; and Yoda finished the job. It was Yoda that lit our darkest hour with that thing and YODA IS DOWN THERE ON THE OTHER TEAM”!!

As Thunderclash puts his massive metal hands in the finger holes of the Matrix, he can feel that Matrix wants to be opened.......

DOWN ON THE NOVA POWER ENFORCED ASTEROID.....

Yoda and Palpatine sit next to each other, meditating on a makeshift carpeted pad in a crevice on the asteroid.

“What is it my friend” Asks Palpatine.

“A disturbance I feel in The Force; but overcome it can be if the plan we follow. Work together we must”. Yoda answers.

“We will succeed if we work together Master Yoda”. Palpatine replies in his ever menacing tone.

“Hmm. Yes. Turned against them their weapon can be. Seen it have I. Controlled it have I”. Says Yoda.

The Force Masters then both return to deep meditation.

Back in the space outside the structure, Maverick opens up the comlink to the rest of the team. “Wolverine, listen up. You and Jor El need to find Yoda and stop him at all costs. While Superman, you and the rest of your super-powered fliers need to move in and start Phase Two without us. It is our only chance”.

Superman does not answer, as he and his fellow Slaves instantly begin following the order; but Wolverine adds: “Listen up Mav, Jor and I are on it I'll be sure to skewer that little green fighting machine or die trying; but we all know what really has to be done here bub. And you guys up there in the ships are the only ones who can do that...... Nothing noble about not being the guy willing to sacrifice one friend for a whole bunch of other lives. Logan and Jor OUT”.

Thunderclash begins to open up the Matrix, when he breaks radio silence. And says: “It's working guys, but there is something not right. This isn't how Optimus, Rodiums, Alpha Trion and the others said it would be in my dream. I don't feel the power of my elders flowing through me. I'm not commanding them, nor are they controlling my actions. I feel nothing. In fact, I don't think it is me opening this thing at all”!!

“We don't think it is either buddy”. Says Wedge. He continues: “We think Yoda might be controlling it down on the asteroid. And if that happens then that thing you just pulled out of your chest, may just light their darkest hour instead of ours. Can you put it back in your chest”??

“No, it won't let me”. Answers Thunderclash.

Maverick chimes in: “Wolverine thinks we should......”.

But Thunderclash cuts him off: “Wolverine is right. It is the only way”.

At the exact same time that this is transpiring, Wolverine and Jor El have just arrived outside the makeshift holdout of Yoda and The Emperor. Palpatine, knowing that Yoda's concentration cannot be broken ventures out on his own to answer the threat. Even Wolverine's strong sense of smell is useless to him with a space helmet on, which gives Palpatine the element of surprise as he leaps into action igniting his crimson blade. Wolverine and the Emperor jump into a pitched battle, when Jor El takes hold of his Kryptonian B.F.G. And takes aim. He fires a series of shots, but Palpatine is able to momentarily exit his battle with Wolverine and dodge the attacks. Palpatine then Force pushes Jor El to the ground, knocking his gun away in the process, while executing a spin through the air which lands him over top of Superman's father and delivers his lightsaber into Jor El's chest. “JOR”!! Wolverine screams as he becomes filled with rage and rushes towards Palpatine to reignite their battle.

BACK IN SPACE...

Maverick, Poe, Wedge, and Dak all circle back and issue a flurry of apologies and laser blasts on their friend Thunderclash, in an attempt to stop the Matrix from opening. Nothing seems to work, as The Matrix seems to not only block, but absorb the projectile attacks, much like a lightsaber does when wielded by a Jedi. They know that if they fire every missile they have at Thunderclash and the Matrix that it may work; but then there will be no way of taking out the defenses of the Nova-structure. Until Dak all of the sudden accelerates well past attack speed, diverting all laser and shield power to the rear thrusters.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING SLAVE 4”?? Asks Slave Leader.

“I'm taking on the whole Matrix myself” responds Dak.

“We can't let him do that”. Says Poe.

“We have to”. Says Maverick and Wedge in unison as the three remaining X-Wings pull up and allow Dak to fire every missile he has, right before he flies the hull of his X-Wing directly into his friend Thunderclash, so as to sacrifice them both and give the Slaves one last shot at survival.

Meanwhile, Wolverine has managed to knock down Palpatine and smack the lightsaber from his hand. He is moving in on the Sith Lord, when Yoda wakes from his meditation, knowing that his plan to commandeer control of the Matrix has failed. “SHEEV”!! Yoda yells, as he realizes that his unlikely friend is in danger. Yoda leaps into action igniting his emerald colored lightsaber and runs at lightning speed at Wolverine. Yoda leaps with a flurry attack, flipping through the air and delivering his lightsaber and feet into the chest of Wolverine, knocking him back right before he was able to deliver the killing blow to The Emperor. Wolverine knocks Yoda to the ground as his healing factor begins to recover him from the lightsaber wound; but Yoda and Palpatine regroup as well. The battle is not quite pitched now as the two Force users surround and overwhelm Wolverine. Wolverine parries many of their attacks; but eventually loses what little control he had of the skirmish. Palpatine delivers a deadly stabbing wound to his heart while Yoda leaps behind the mutant and removes his head. Palpatine and Yoda then waste no time, as they are well aware of Wolverine's powers and skill set. Palpatine takes far too much pleasure in slicing Wolverine into about a dozen pieces, which Yoda then Force blasts into all different directions, sending them deep into space.

With the big plans of both of these teams to end this battle before it started quelled; the battle that these two teams were deserving is now completely underway. As Maverick, Wedge, and Poe dodge, evade, and fight back against the Nova controlled Nova-structure itself, in an attempt to find some sort of power source, Amazon is mid-air battling Ursa, Superman has begun trading blows with Steel Doomsday, Fernus and Doomslayer have begun an epic battle of who can be more cray-cray as the kids like to say-say, and Tomar Tu and Zillius Zox have both begun to move in towards Black Lantern Loki.

Ursa attempts to arrogantly overcome the weather controlling powers of Amazon by using her own powerful breath; but fails to do so. Amazon sees this little victory and decides to up the ante by throwing as much solar flared space weather as she can muster at Ursa; but the fully-powered Kryptonian will not be outclassed. Just because Ursa could not beat Amazon at her own game, doesn't mean she couldn't win the fight her way. Ursa manages to stay in the air against the powers of Princess Orora, fight through the resistance and grab a hold of Amazon. Once in close quarters Amazon feels that she may have the upper hand due to her superior melee skills; but that does not seem to matter either as it is not fighting prowess or latent ability that wins the day; but rather sheer physical strength. Ursa manages to let the blows of Amazon glance off of her as she gets her hands around her opponents neck, not letting go until she feels the vertebrae crack in her palm.

As the guy that took out the original Doomsday: Superman is not having quite as much trouble with the Steel version as some on The Highness may have hoped. Superman hangs back in the air after a series of exchanged punches and lets loose an intense blast of heat vision which burns away much of the protective armor donned by this particular Doomsday clone. Once the melted gear begins to bond to the Doomsday, Superman flies down and relentlessly pounds Steel Doomsday into oblivion with his fists.

Maverick, Wedge, and Poe are accomplishing amazing feats of acrobatic flight, in combating the turbo lasers of the Nova-structure; but they now finally believe that they have discovered the physical power source that Nova is pumping energy into and also from. The three stunt fighters swoop under the defenses and counter-measures laid out by good ol' Dick Rider (best name in all of comics) and put themselves in attack position. Maverick gives the order to fire as Wedge and Poe fire everything and Maverick fires all but two advanced missiles so as to save a little something for when the smoke clears. Mav gives the order for evacuation, and evacuate Poe and Wedge do. Although Maverick in the lead position of the formation is caught in one of the last counter-measures. Slave Leader's ship begins to spin out of control towards the center of power source; but right before his X-Wing is totally destroyed, he shoots off his remaining two projectiles to knock out the shields and power of the Nova-structure once and for all. Maverick's ship is still crushed into nothing by the sheer weight of the solidified energy around him.

Tomar Tu and Zillius Zox come at Black Lantern Loki from opposite sides and deliver a plethora of green constructs and red plasma vomit blasts at the Norse god of mischief. Known by all three competitors that they need to combine their lantern abilities in order to destroy Loki, they all act accordingly. In an attempt to separate the two Slaves Loki mischievously zaps a small meteor above them off course and sends it directly into Tomar Tu, burying him underneath it. Loki then easily fights through the red plasma blasts of Zox and rips his heart out for a quick feast. Loki revels in his victory and at the taste of the lantern heart, when an enraged Tomar Tu uses his ring to blast the boulder holding him down into pieces. Despite the protective green aura that his ring provides for him, Tu is extremely bruised and battered, serving to forget his normal overwhelming emotion and let anger take over. This ends up working in his favor as his anger attracts the free-floating red ring of Zox, which attaches itself to the left hand of Tomar. The newly made double lantern, puts a red aura around a massive green sword construct and uses it to slice Black Lantern Loki in half and this time kill him for good.

As Poe and Wedge double back and see how they can regroup and help the others, they are met by Nova himself, who is none too happy with the recent destruction of his super structure. Nova levels an enormous blast of energy in their direction, which completely wipes out Poe's ship and heavily damages the ship of Wedge. Wedge is able to right himself and notices Nova coming around for another pass. With no shields left, and his hull and systems functioning at only around 25%, Wedge takes aim at Nova with his lasers and in an incredible bout of luck and skill mixed is able to blast the small target into oblivion.

Doomslayer and Fernus are bloodied, burned, bruised, and barely breathing as their pitched battle continues. They have both thrown everything they have at one another, yet neither seems to gain the upper hand. As the two of them muster what remaining strength they have, they rush at one another. Fernus delivers a double fisted punch to the head of Doomslayer, while Doomslayer comes down hard on the head of Fernus with a building leveling punch. Both of their necks break, as they join each in death.

Superman regroups with the green and red ring wielding Tomar Tu, while Ursa stands alone awaiting the rendezvous of her teammates Palpatine and Yoda. As the two Force Masters are seen running towards them over the asteroid horizon and Ursa is flying fast to meet her nemesis Superman in battle, Tomar Tu envelops the area with a redish-green aura; so as to slow the motion of Palpatine and Yoda. Ursa barrages Superman with a flurry of punches, then backs away and hits him with a burst of heat vision delivered mid-flight. But Superman perseveres through the attack and then mounts one of his own. The two old enemies enter into a skirmish that is not quite as pitched as Ursa had hoped for as the Last Son of Krypton proves who the top Kryptonian is by getting a hold of Ursa and squeezing until her back begins to crack. Supes is then able to throw Ursa down to the hard asteroid ground and then quickly finish the attack by coming down hard, feet first on to Zod's former captain to grind her into oblivion and finish her off for good.

Tomar Tu's energy aura certainly worked to insure Superman a one on one battle against his old nemesis; but it was destined to not hold two warriors as powerful as Yoda and Sidious for long. As Yoda's concentration breaks he violently waves his arms causing the green and red energy aura to dissipate. Palpatine wastes no time; and as soon as Tomar is left exposed he takes action. The Dark Lord of the Sith leaps into action and sends his crimson lightsaber deep into the chest of Tomar Tu. By the time Palpatine lands, Yoda is ready and at his side for a final stand off between the incoming Kryptonian. Superman uses his mighty breath to blow Yoda over and send him momentarily sailing, while Palpatine ignites his lightsaber and leaps towards Supes. Superman is able to avoid most of the lightsaber swings, but the ones that do hit, do not deal nearly as much damage as the Sith Lord had hoped. Superman then hits Palpatine with a punch that would kill most humans, but the Force aura around the Sith Lord protects him from serious damage. Superman does not hesitate for a second as Palpatine is recovering to move in on Yoda and attempt to finish off the diminutive Senior Jedi. Supes starts unleashing a blast of heat vision on Yoda, who barely gets his lightsaber up in time to block it. As Yoda uses his Force weapon and the Force itself to block the Kryptonian power, Superman simply continues to up the power and gain the upper hand; but Palpatine leaps back into action to defend his unlikely ally by hitting Kal El with the strongest burst of Sith Lightning he has ever conjured. This throws Superman off of his game; but not before he inflicts mortally wounding burns to the body of Yoda. Superman then redirects his attack back to Palpatine, despite being bombarded with the Sith tainted Force Lightning. Superman, while being dealt intense pain from the glowing, powerful attack continues to slowly move towards Palpatine through his shouts of “NO” and “DIE”. Palpatine's vicious smile turns into a puzzled frown as his brutal shouts turn to a plea of “MASTER YODA!! PLEEEEEZE HELP”!!!!

Open wounds are visible all over the body of Superman from the Sith Lightning permeating his normally impenetrable skin; but this does not stop Superman from reaching The Emperor's position and grabbing a hold of his body. Superman bellows as he rips off the right arm of Palpatine with his left hand and delivers a neck breaking punch with his right fist. But mere seconds after the death of Palpatine, a green lightsaber, thrown from the scorched body of Yoda penetrates the skin of the Man of Steel through one of the Kryptonian's open wounds, finding his heart in the process. As Yoda and Superman both deal with the pain of their last few seconds of life, Yoda looks over at the lifeless body of his friend Sheev and says: “Avenged you are, dead ….. their........ champion........... is.....”.

SEVERAL HOURS LATER.....

“Superman are you there.... Jor El, Superman, Thunderclash, Maverick..... Is anybody there?? This is Ki Adi Mundi. Has anybody survived the attack. We need all hands back on The Playoff Planet. REPEAT. Is anybody left. Has anybody survived the attack”??

“General Mundi. This is Slave 2, reporting in”.

“WEDGE!! Is anybody else left”??

Wedge replies: “That's a negative General Mundi, I am the only survivor of this battle. My X-Wing is heavily damaged, and I am limping it back home to you. But I am the only one. Our team is dead..... Repeat, our team is.......... Dead.

Monday, September 12, 2016

Universe Bowl IX: Prequel

As the playoff planet itself has proven, nothing is ever completely over. Every ending, no matter how finite, can still lead to a new beginning. That doesn’t mean that things do not come to an end though, it just means that nobody should ever say never, well, at least they should know that never doesn’t exactly mean the end.

As the Living Tribunal and Kid Q both look down upon the new playoff planet, knowing full well that their own endings are upon them, they contemplate that very question.

Living Tribunal: Well kid, this is it. Our final fight.

Kid Q: Maybe it is for you LT but I don’t plan on this being the final chapter in my book. We are both god’s anyways, is there really an end for us?

LT: First off, we are not gods. We may have omnipotent qualities to us but we are far from being gods.

Kid Q: Speak for yourself but I can alter reality and create reality to my making, which sounds god-like to me.

LT: That’s exactly what I was saying, we are god-like but we are most definitely not gods.

Kid Q: Semantics. If either of us wanted this match to be null in void we could make it so and you know full well we could.

LT: Could we?

Kid Q: You know it.

LT: Then why don’t we? Why doesn’t one of us just end this battle before it starts and declare our teams the champions of this league.

Kid Q: (Stumbling over his words but never quite making out anything audible)

LT: You don’t know, right?

Kid Q: And I suppose you have the answer?

LT: No I don’t have the answer, none of us “God-Like” beings do and don’t you think a true god or creator would know the answer to a question like that?

Kid Q: Let’s just do it then, let’s both end this thing right now.

LT: (Laughs) Okay kid, let’s do it then.

Kid Q: Fine, I will. I’m bringing this one home for the good guys.

LT: Okay, I’m waiting.

Several minutes go by and nothing happens.

LT: Doesn’t feel like a victory has been had by either of us yet.

Kid Q: Well, that doesn’t mean that we can’t make it happen. Maybe if you were not here I would be able to easily do it but since you are here and have a similar power structure as I, we are unable to finish the job off.

LT: Or maybe since neither of us are gods, it is not even a remote possibility of this event taking place.

Kid Q: I don’t except that. We both know that if we wanted to do anything we could imagine, we could make it happen.

LT: Who is to say that we can imagine what we are both describing here? Maybe in our limited minds we are incapable of imaging such an outcome to this fight.

Kid Q: Are you saying that neither of us is able to imagine something that the both of us have been discussing for the previous fifteen minutes?

LT: No, what I am saying is that even though both of us believe we understand what we are discussing, that perhaps we our both woefully ignorant to the concept, despite the fact that we both believe we comprehend the idea behind the outcome.

Kid Q: Why say ten words when seventy five sounds so much smarter! (He says in a mocking tone)

LT: By god, I believe that is the universal sign for surrender. Would a god resort to mocking his opponent?

Kid Q: Evidently I would.

LT: (Laughs) Very well then.

Kid Q: What?

LT: Oh nothing, just funny.

Kid Q: What’s funny? I mean, I am well aware that I can be quite humorous when I need to be.

LT: Our final fight, it actually lived up to my expectations.

Kid Q: (Chuckles as he understands the meaning behind his comment) So it did, so it did.

LT: Well, you ending this or should I.

Kid Q: I think it is only fitting that we both make the decision to end this thing. After all, we are the god’s in this fight.

LT: Well when you put it that way, I have a hard time disagreeing with you. Well I suppose this is goodbye then kid.

Kid Q: Suppose so. Any regrets?

LT: Maybe a couple, but I don’t regret the time I put in, too many good memories.

Kid Q: Yeah, the good memories always outweigh the bad in the end.

LT: You?

Kid Q: Naw, no regrets, but it definitely is time.

LT: No doubt about that. Well kid, I guess I’ll see you on the other side.

Kid Q: No doubt about that. On the count of three...

LT: One.

Kid Q: Two.


The two god-like beings disappear from the battle and the remaining combatants finally making their way onto the field of play, setting this final fight of the year officially into motion.