The Right Wing is Red She-Hulk, Cosmic Hulk Robot, Skarr (son of Hulk), Lyra the She-Hulk, Victoria w/a Red Lightsaber, Osmosis Jones, Frederick Douglass and Mike Huckabee.
Brock Samson’s Fighting Murderflies are The Blair Witch, Rancor #1, Bob: Agent of Hydra, Squirrels #1-15, Al Qaeda Soldiers #1-20, and The Wu Tang Clan: ODB, Dirt McGirt, Big Baby Jesus, RZA, GZA, Method Man, Raekwon, Ghost Face Killah, Inspectah Deck, U-God, Masta-Killa, & Cappadonna.
The air is thick on Dagobah tonight, and that’s not just due to the haze of smoke courtesy of the Wu Tang Clan, who are currently so baked they can hardly even stand. Frederick Douglass leads the Right Wing charge as they swarm the Murderflies. Osmosis Jones instantly leaps into ODB’s nose, but is dissolved by the massive amounts of cocaine that was coating the inside of the rapper’s nostrils. Lyra the She-Hulk has covered part of her body in war paint in the fashion of blue with white stars. Red She-Hulk has donned war paint as well, but her’s is white stripes streaking across her vibrant red body. The two patriotic powerhouses crash into the Al Qaeda insurgence and viciously begin to rip apart their bodies. The Soldiers try and fight back, but their bullets simply bounce off of their impenetrable skin. Al Qaeda Soldier #1 attempts to sacrifices himself with a bomb that is strapped to him, but Skaar joins the fray and does a Hulk Clap that squishes the Soldier before he can detonate the bomb. All twenty Soldiers are quickly and mercilessly disposed of in way that would make S.E.A.L. Team Six blush.
Victoria the leaps into action, igniting her lightsaber and slices through RZA as she bites down on the neck of Method Man. The then punches a hole right through Raekwon. Fredrick Douglass then backs her up and shoots Inspectah Deck down with his rifle. Mike Huckabee jumps down out of a tree and blasts Big Baby Jesus and GZA in the head with his twin glocks as Victoria finishes off the rest of the Wu Tang Clan. Bob: Agent of Hydra then finds himself staring down the business end of Victoria’s lightsaber when he tried to sneak up on the vampire. His attack is to no avail as she cuts him down without hesitation.
Cosmic Hulk Robot is currently tangled up with Rancor #1, but the contest is over in a matter of mere moments when the Rancor tried to swallow the Hulk Robot, who then proceeded to rip the jaw clean off of the giant monster. The Blair Witch bursts from the shadows and lunges towards Huckabee and Douglass, but Skaar stops her and slices her in two with his enormous sword. The members of the Right Wing then disperse throughout the woods of Dagobah to hunt down and kill the fifteen Squirrels that are scampering about.
THE RIGHT WING IS VICTORIOUS!!
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3 comments:
Murderflies: All dead.
Right Wing: Red She-Hulk, Cosmic Hulk Robot, Skaar, Victoria, Lyra the She-Hulk, Frederick Douglass, and Mike Huckabee survive.
Mike Huckabee with Twin Glocks... I LOVE IT!!
By the way, for posterity sake, it was actually Rancor #2 that appeared in this match (Rancor #1 is on The Graveyard).
I like that you had the Blair Witch come out of the Shadows. Not exactly ironic or funny but it still made me chuckle.
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