Season 4 Week 11 Built Ford Tough vs The Abomitrons

Built Ford Tough is: O Ren Ishi

 
 

The Abomitrons are: Chuck Norris and Ewok #47

 

Let's get this out of the way now:

Chuck Norris "facts" are less like facts and more like… bad jokes that stopped being funny in 2009.

Chuck Norris does not have a fist in his beard, He does not push the world down instead of doing a push up.

He did not give birth to Secretariat while teaching Bagger Vance how to find "dryland" and surviving on nothing but his own filtered urine and adventure. He did not take the one ring to Mordor and rescue Hogwarts from the Uruk-Hai because he had a few extra minutes one day… He may have had a brief affair with Dumbledore… But who didn't really?

You know what Chuck Norris did do? Chuck Norris failed to notice the Ewok shrieking in terror as O Ren Ishi emerged from the bathroom door.

"Look little man, err little critter… whatever the hell you are, look… If I can hold my water for an entire day of shooting Walker Texas Ranger, you can chill until we get to the rest stop 2 miles down the road. It sucks that the bathroom on this thing is busted… but it's been broken since we left so quit trying to go in there, and quit pointing at the door like that's somehow magically going to get rid of the smell. I eat a lot of red meat, THAT is a Chuck Norris "fact" you can take to the bank. The best we can do is just seal that room off until we can dump the tank… or.. until we can burn this RV down to its frame… one of the two…

During the middle of his incredibly smug diatribe O Ren Ishi severed the head of Ewok #47 and Chuck Norris with her Hanzo Sword in a single swipe.

"Good lord it smelled horrible in there…. I think my nose-hairs have fallen out."

Built Ford Tough is victorious!