Season X Week 9: Tiny Deranged Lesbian Midgets vs. Vader's Sith Aids

Midgets are: X-23,  Walker Texas Ranger (w/ Blue Lightsaber)

Sith Aids are: Darth Vader (w/ Red Lantern Ring)

The three combatants are dropped into the match at the same moment and immediately Walker and Vader begin to duel with their lightsabers. X-23 tries to bum rush the Sith lord but Vader uses the force to pull all the VHS tapes out of every nook and cranny of the apartment and send them back at the superhero like a shotgun blast of outdated technology. She lies on the ground stunned for a moment.

The duel continues and although Superman wears Chuck Norris PJs to bed, the dark one is not swayed by internet meme magic no matter how many fists come out of his beard. Walker is clearly out dueled and knows this will not last long. His saber is flung from his hand with the stronger swipe from Vader. Walker quickly draws his firearm and aims for the eye in Vader's helmet, assuming it is the weak point. Using his red lantern ring he is able to hold Walker in a construct of a fist. A fist even bigger than his 501 Vader's Fist cosplay nerds are douchey.

"If you strike me down, I shall beco--" moans Walker as Vader crushes him to death within the construct.

"Yeah, I heard that one before" Vader grumbles.

Jumping in on the attack as Walker dies is X-23 with the dropped lightsaber trying to take advantage of the distraction. Vader is quick to feel the shift in the force and grabs her by the left arm holding the saber just as she tries to land the killing blow. She gargles for breath as Vader's force chokes her and she can feel her chest fight for air that isn't coming. In a fight for life, the lightsaber drops from her outstretched arm.

Vader begins to say something witty but before he can, the falling lightsaber is grabbed by X-23's free hand and ignites through his torso.