Spoiler Sport Play-offs Round 1 Extavaganza!

Hello everyone, Cotton McKnight here. Welcome to Spoiler Sport. Here on The Ocho! The road to the Universe Bowl is always a treacherous one, and Round 1 of the FFL Play-offs delivered the satisfying action that our loyal viewers demand!

We begin in the Stan Lee conference, where Michael Vick's Bad Newz Kennelz of Lurve tried to deliver a sobering loss to The Royal Highness. The Kennelz' Hall of Famer Black Bolt all but had it wrapped up. Unfortunately, an X-factor Forced him to The FFL Graveyard via the team of Yoda and Professor Charles Xavier. We here at Spoiler Sport would like to take a moment of silence for Black Bolt, as his feats have impressed FFL viewers for years. You will be missed. RIP Black Bolt. .......
The Kennelz cannot be pleased about this turn of events and are likely to exact retribution on The Highness next year for this transgression! Could a new Hebert Division rivalry be brewing? Stay tuned!!!

Staying in the Stan Lee Conference, Team Sleeping Pussy claw their way back from the brink of oblivion against TEAM. With both teams loaded with powerhouses, it surprisingly came down to a common Skrull besting both Joe Levine and Fred Baker for the win. This means that Team SP is heading to the second round to try to weed The Highness out of the Play-offs! We here at Spoiler Sport wish both teams the best of luck in this Hebert Division showdown!

Meanwhile, in The George Lucas Conference, the Horsemen's unlikely duo of Superman and Bedtime Bear puts The Grindhouse to sleep in a second heartbreaking loss this season to their Spielberg Division foes. Superman came in the nick of time to save the Care Bear, right when a carefully placed Griffin LMD was going to finish the job. We will be keeping an eye on the delivery of said fruit basket from Bedtime Bear to Superman, and will break into regular progamming if need be!

Finally, the match between George Washington's Slaves and The Shemalabama Shit-Kickers both began and ended with an origin story. We learned the truth behind the Play-off Planet(s), while Skaar continued to add to the pile of corpses that remain forever rotting on the planet's surface en route to a Slaves victory! Congratulations are in order for Darth Shamalay and Real Man, who appear to be expecting! True to his shallow character, it seems that Real Man has left to "Get a pack of cigarettes", from which he has yet to return. We can only hope that he finds it in his heart to come back for the sake of Real Gayby. Godspeed Real Man. Godspeed. This victory sets up an interesting Conference Finals, as The Slaves represent for The Clarke Division against The Horsemen of Apokolips

We now shine a spotlight on the always entertaining Consolation
Round, with our new special correspondant! Take it away Chris!

Welcome to FFL is Jericho! I'm your special guest reporter, The Man of 1004 holds, the first Undisputed World Champion, The Ayatollah of Rock 'n Rolla, Chris Jericho!!! Let's face it kids, nobody cares. Teams won, teams lost... etc... etc... But the true Highlight Reel concerns the MVP for week 1 of the Consolation, Agent Phil Coulson. Get over here Phil.

Umm, hi Mr. Jericho, I'm a huge fan.

Of course you are, but what the people reeeeeaaaaaallly want to know is: Why didn't you hit that when you had the chance?

I'm sorry?

You know, hit Maria Hill?

Why would I hit Agent Hill? We're teammates.

C'mon Phil. Sometimes you gotta get on top of the Hill to get a better view of the peaks and valleys, if you know what I mean...

I'm not following you.

And I think you just answered our question. Take a hike junior!!! That's all the time I have for this week, so make sure you catch FOZZY when we rock your town on our current tour! C'MON BAYBAAAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Chris! And as always, no Spoiler Sport is complete without a check on the Graveyard points with Pepper Brooks. Pepper!

Muh muh muhhmuh muhmuh muh muh muh. Muh muhmuh muh muhhmuh, muhhmuh muh muh muhmuh muh muhmuh muhhmuh muh!!! Muhmuh muh muhmuh muh muhmuh muhhmuh. Muh muh muh muhmuh muh muhmuh muh muh muhhmuh muh. Muh muhmuh muh muhmuh muhhmuh muhmuh muh, muh muhhmuh muhmuh muhmuh muh muh muhmuh muh!!!

Thanks Pepper! I will always be inspired by all the progress you have made since last year!

This week the Play-off action intensifies and we will find out which teams have what it takes to get to the coveted Universe Bowl! No matter what happens, one thing can be sure: none of these combatants will ever be the same again! We'll also get some Consolation Round tune-ups, featuring our unlucky teams battling in an auto parts store looking for the repairs they need to compete.

For The Ocho, I'm Cotton McKnight. Stay tuned for the Air Guitar semi-finals, live from Sydney, Australia! Thank you, and good night.