S9 Playoffs Round 1 - Royal Highness vs Team SP

The Royal HIghness is:  Q2 (9 deaths), Cyborg Doomsday  (9 deaths), Superboy Doomsday, Yoda, Fantastic Four ( Reed Richards w/Ultimate Nullifier, Invisible Woman, Human Torch, and The Thing) in The Anti-Galactus Suit., (Non symbiote) Black Suit Spider-man, Old Man Logan, The Flash (Barry Allen),  Apollo (Authority) (9 death),  Midnighter, Agent Smith, Sandworm #1A , Emperor Palpatine,  The Sinister Six (minus 2) (Doctor Octopus, Electro, Hobgoblin, and Vulture) , Sandman, Chameleon, Vampire Jean Grey (9 death), Gladiator (Shi'ar Imperial Guard) (9 death), Maleficient, Mike Greenwell w/Green Lightsaber on Green Yoshi, Good Luck Bear (Care Bears) (9 death). The Members not already on the surface are above in an  Alliance Medical Frigate.

Team Sleeping Pussy is: Bizarro Superman, Jonah Hex (9 death w/ Yellow Lantern Ring), Wildcat (9 death), Psycho Pirate, Catman, Brother Blood (9 death w/ Sirius Black’s wand), Swamp Thing, Gay Alan Scott (9 death), Ultron (9 death), Bullseye (w/Red Lightsaber), The Vanisher (9 death), Nightshade, Sunfire, Miracle Dog, Vampirella, S.D. Bob "Snake" Plissken (w/ Green Lantern Ring), Duncan McLeod (w/ Green LIghtsaber), Miho, Expendables: The Lone Wolf  (9 death),Savage Dragon, Prof Snape, Dave Bowman: The Starchild, Movie Rachet, Mt Dew Transformer, Smokescreen, Scourge, The Monster Squad: Pete the Dog

Sandworm 1A soars from the the sand and crashes down, barely missing the Transformers from Team SP who started in the desert region. Rachet does a quick roll and immediately retaliates with some quick shots that glance off the protective scales of the giant beast.  Meanwhile, Scourge, Smokescreen and the Mt. Dew Transformer immediately need to go on the defensive from Sandman, Old Man Logan, Chameleon and Mike Greenwell who is riding in on his trusty steed Green Yoshi. The Mt. Dew transformer starts shooting cans of its delicious but highly caffeinated beverages at Greenie who easily explodes the on coming cans with his lightsaber. Yoshi assists by eating several cans in a row and is able to send a fireball back at the transformer.  This causes him to stumble long enough for Old Man Logan to leap onto his back and sink his claws into the neck and head of the modified vending machine.

“Looks like you’re out of order.” Logan growls

Maybe less time with the one liners were in order because Scourge quickly avenges his buddy by blasting both Logan as well as Greenie and Yoshi. Scourge then turns his blasts at Sandman who stands stoic, unflinching at the blasts. As Scourge barrels down faster, Sandman suddenly erects a wall of sand that stops Scourge so suddenly that he explodes in an epic fireball. Sandman then manipulates the sand like waves in the ocean knocking Smokescreen and Rachet down on to the sand. Rachet is able to right himself and take out Chameleon but soon finds himself the smaller fish in this sea of sand as he is gobbled up by Sandworm 1A who leaps skyward. Smokescreen watches his teammate disappear and soon realizes that his fate will soon mirror the death of Rachet as gravity sends the sandworm back down to the ground.  Smokescreen ignites every one of his weapons just as the Sandworm is upon him and the resulting explosion kills them both.

Sandman calms the desert once again and walks over to the sparking wreckage of the Mt Dew transformer and reaches inside his torso. He pulls out a few cans decides to enjoy a cool beverage as the lone desert survivor before wandering off to find his other teammates.

In the city… The Lone Wolf, Vanisher, Jonah Hex and Brother Blood are on a 9 death killing mission. These four are not going out quietly or in some dumb explosion. They are out for blood. They lead a large rag tag team of Pussies that are no longer sleeping, they are awake and ready to kill.  Lone Wolf leads his pack as he kicks open the doors to an old warehouse. They are met with a bolt of sith lightning from Palpatine which splits the Pussies into two squads. Along with Palpatine, Black Suit Spiderman and The Flash rush after Jonah Hex and Brother Blood. Brother Blood holds his own against Palpatine’s lightning with the help of Sirius Black’s wand. He is able to keep him at bay long enough for The Vanisher who, very unselfishly, gets behind the Sith Lord and teleports them both out existence and himself to the graveyard.

Black suit spiderman shoots some black web or whatever he has into the face of Brother Blood and starts kicking and punching him as he is blinded. Jonah Hex and Lone Wolf are a couple of sure shots and the are able to headshoot the knock-off spidey.  They can’t quite get a good shot at the Flash and he is able to sneak up and kill Brother Blood before he can remove the web from his eye. It isn’t until Bizarro Superman flies in and hits The Flash with freeze vision long enough for Jonah Hex to get the final killing shot.

The west wall blows in sending cement and steel shrapnel into the room. Miho is killed by half a cinder block that obliterates his skull. In through the new hole in the wall walk Cyborg Doomsday and Superboy Doomsday. The fearless Jonah Hex takes his final run at Cyborg Doomsday along with Bizarro Superman. While his courage is admirable, this is the end of the line for Hex. A simple, well placed punch to the chest is enough to crush his entire ribcage and stop every internal organ sending this long time Pussy to the graveyard. Bizarro Superman flies in and lands in front of the two Doomsday iterations of the monster that killed his bizarro self twenty plus years ago. He stares the two of them down when Ultron comes up and stands next to Bizarro Supes and readies himself for this epic fight that’s about to go down.

Lone Wolf has regrouped and rallies a team to take on a rush of the Highness members who have charged into the room. Within a few minutes, Snape and Savage Dragon fall to Gladiator. Gladiator is then dropped by Gay Alan Scott. Apollo puts on a clinic as he disposes of Sunfire and Nightshade. Bullseye doesn’t miss as he then runs his red lightsaber into Apollo’s skull. Vampire Jean Grey uses mind control to send Wildcat into frenzy against his own team. Wildcat shreds his feline kinfolk, Catman, and gets a couple good slashes in on Bullseye before Gay Alan Scott shoots out a window above Grey, exposing her to direct sunlight and burning the Vampire version of this powerful superhero for good.

Bullseye tends to his wounds a bit sees Agent Smith charging at him. His shots, although expertly placed, are easily dodged by this master of the matrix. The Agent is able to quickly end him with a hundred punches in a matter of seconds. This leaves Agent Smith in a three-against-one matchup. He holds his own well but is only able to finish off Gay Alan Scott for his final death before being double teamed by Lone Wolf and Wildcat.

Don’t worry, I’ll come back to that Doomsdays/Supes & Ultron fight.

Meanwhile, in the space above, Q2 and Bowman are locked in an eternal battle of wits. Their minds fight an infinite number of times every second. They both have the power to destroy the other while sacrificing themselves, but with nine deaths, Q2 is keeping this as a last resort.

The last regimen of Team SP are making their way through the rainforest as they are met suddenly with opposing gunfire from The Midnighter and the Fantastic Four who are assembled in an Anti Galactus suit. Snake Plissken uses his Green Lantern ring to construct a shield while Psycho Pirate attempts to control the mind of the much stronger Reed Richards while the Swamp thing manipulates the trees around the fantastic four. This buys Vampirella, Duncan McLeod, Pete the Dog and Miracle Dog time to attack the 4 members of the Sinister six. The two dogs grab Vulture by the neck and tear out his throat. McLeod happily relieves Hobgoblin of his head and using his lightsaber cuts the arms off Doctor Octopus. Vampirella is able to move in to finish off Doc Ock and also Electro who just finished frying Miracle dog and Pete the Dog to a delicious crisp. Midnighter and Maleficient move in and Vampirella is able to dispatch of Maleficient but before she can finish drinking the blood of the evil witch, the Midnighter is quick to avenge her death by snapping the neck of the scantily clad Drakulon. Duncan McLeod proves to be too much for the Midnighter to handle as the ancient highlander has grown very fond of his lightsaber.

The Swamp Thing and Psycho Pirate are losing their hold on the Fantastic Four.  Swamp thing calls to his teammates to leave him here and regroup with Bizarro Superman in the city. They briefly protest but then agree it is the right move.  Plissken, McLeod, and Psycho Pirate escape quickly to join the fight in the city leaving the Swamp Thing behind to eventually fall to the Fantastic Four.

Back in the city, The Highness look outnumbered. The two Doomsdays have started their fight with Bizarro Superman and Ultron. Not only that but now the Pussies have help. Superboy Doomsday has started to brawl with Bizarro Superman. Superboy Doomsday punches Bizarro across the room but then quickly needs to get Wildcat who has now jumped on his back and is clawing at his head. He jumps up as high as he can and smashes himself into the ceiling crushing the DC superhero and using up the rest of his nine lives. The Lone Wolf helps Bizarro Superman to his feet.

“Hey! I have pajamas with your face on them!” says Bizarro Superman to Lone Wolf

Lone Wolf takes shots at Superboy Doomsday as he is falling back to the floor. The Wolf doesn’t flinch as the giant beast rights himself and bears down on him and easily dispatches of the pesky human.

The two metallic powerhouses exchange blows with each other. Cyborg Doomsday is hit several times by Ultron’s energy blasts which briefly stun him. He retaliates with an uppercut that sends the Avengers foe back on his ass. Reinforcements have arrived from the forest and Duncan McLeod charges at Cyborg Doomsday as Plissken attempts to hold him with his ring. Plissken is not an experienced lantern and his construct is not strong enough to hold. Cyborg Doomsday is able to break free of it and grabs McLeod before he is able to land an attack. He then uses McLeod as a baseball bat and tees up Plissken’s head killing both of them instantly. Ultron picks up the lightsaber dropped by McLeod and before Cyborg Doomsday can turn around, Ultron buries the lightsaber down the back of his neck and it comes out the front of his chest dropping the Highness juggernaut for the last time.

Psycho Pirate has moved in to help Bizarro Superman with Superboy Doomsday. The Pirate moves in a little too close and allows Doomsday to use the Pirate as a shield against Bizarro Superman’s heat breath burning him to death. Ultron moves in and kicks out the last Doomsday’s leg sideways dropping him to a knee. From a crippled stance, he fights valiantly against the two Pussies Powerhouses. He is able to rip the right arm off Ultron and beat him back with his own appendage. Bizarro Superman then gets him in a strangle hold and Superboy Doomsday uses the same trick he did on Wildcat. He rams Bizarro Supes multiple times into the ceiling and walls and crashes out into the street. The Man of Steel is proving to be just that. Both are exhausted. Superboy Doomsday is nearly choked to death and Bizarro is losing his grip. Ultron is manages to get up and starts heading over to help finish the job.

A rocket blasts from the sky and Ultron is able to jump away at the last second. The resulting explosion kills both Bizarro Supes and Superboy Doomsday. Ultron looks at the ship that circles above the smoke and flames as it lands in the street in front of him.  He sees Good Luck Bear piloting the craft and doing a poor job of setting the ship down. Ultron approaches as the door opens and a small hooded creature walks out.

“Forgot about me, you have? Hmm...  The graveyard, your destination will be”

Although he is one armed, Ultron ignites the lightsaber he still possesses and no longer feels the exhaustion he felt a minute ago. Yoda removes his robe and unclips his lightsaber...

In space, Dave Bowman feels the tides turning in this match. Here he is holding his own with Q2 but now he can feel the much more threatening presence of the Fantastic Four who have headed off the planet and are now on their way to meet him here in space. What is worse, Reed Richards still possesses the Ultimate Nullifier. He knows he is down to two options and both do not fare well for his team. He takes his gamble and teleports Q2 to the center of a dying star. As he feared and expected, Q2’s mental grip on him was too strong and he has come along for the ride. Oh well, not sure if he would have held up against the Nullifier anyway. The star reaches Supernova and both Q2 and The Starchild are sucked into the resulting black hole.

The Alliance Medical Frigate is flying away from the city which lay in ruin. Yoda is admiring his new souvenir, a shiny silver metallic mask. Good Luck Bear sees a man walking below coming toward them and moves his furry digitless paw toward the button to fire a rocket.

“Shoot you will not!” says Yoda abruptly. “Enemy this man is not.”

The ship lowers and they open the door to let in Sandman.  “Thanks for the lift!” He says holding up two cans of Mountain Dew. “You fellas thirsty?”