Team Sleeping Pussy are: S.H.I.E.L.D Agent Reginald "Butterscotch" McTwivent
Griffin's High Maintenance Dope Fiends and Destroyers are: two Separatist Commandos
The two Separatist Commandos are running around Hogwarts, furiously kicking in every door.
"This is taking too long" says "Sexy" Rex Jangstro "Every minute McTwivent lives, we get closer to death"
"Relax, Rex. He's only one man" replies his partner Eli Zohalski
"One man??!!! ONE MAN!" screams Rex as he furiously kicks in another door "Have you been paying attention? This man has basically decimated every opponent that's in front of him. Did you hear what he did to that Goblin? And how he just crushed those 3 video game guys? F**k that, I'm not going down. Hells no."
"Dude, clam down. We're on a hell of a tear too" assures Eli "Just keep your head and we'll be..."
suddenly there's a WHOOM and a flash of light, and the next thing Jangstro knows he hears the sound of Zohalski's helmet hitting the floor, with his teammates head still in it.
"Oh s**t. Oh, f**k." says Rex as he begins to panic.
He wildly starts opening fire, hoping to hit his opponent.
"Where are you??!!! SHOW YOURSELF!!!!" screams the Dope Fiend
"Relax, kid. Relax. I just was hitting the pantry for something. Calm down" smiles "Butterscotch" as he emerges from the potions cabinet.
"What's in your hand? WHAT's IN YOUR F***ING HAND!!!!" scream Rex, who's not so sexy at the moment as he's just finished pissing his pants
"This, this is just an empty bottle" smiles McTwivent "No need to panic. Just relax"
"Yeah? YEAH??!!! What was in the BOTTLE?"
"Oh, something I think you may be familiar with. It's called..how do you pronounce this midi-chlorians??"
"Midi-...oh. F**K!" screams Rex and begins firing as fast as he can at the SHIELD Agent.
Butterscotch pulls his lightsaber as soon as he sees the motions of Rex pulling his trigger finger and deflects every shot, sends one back at Jangtstro-disarming him.
"Well, look at this." smiles McTwivent as he looks at his terrified, unarmed opponent
"You know something kid, this is my last match of the year, so I'm gonna do something special, something just for you."
"Please, just kill me" sobs Rex "I give up"
"Yeah, that's not gonna work for me. I've always wanted to try this, ever since I read about it on the Internet." says McTwivent "It's called a Force Tornado."
"But, but those are..." begins Rex but he's quickly silenced as McTwivent begins to cause the winds to whip up in a fury. The last thought that passes through Rex Jangstro's mind is "I can't believe this is happening". The last thing that passes through Rex's head is the wall of Hogwarts as his head is flattened against the hallowed halls of the magical academy.
Griffin's High Maintenance Dope Fiends and Destroyers: All dead
Team Sleeping Pussy: Reginald "Butterscotch" McTwivent survives
TEAM SLEEPING PUSSY IS VICTORIOUS!!!
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3 comments:
McTwivent... The Consolation MVP from Hell!!
Holy crap dude, that match ruled!!!!!!!!
Ain't nothing I love more than a force Tornado.
I agree with this match and understand that I have another follower. Come and join me to finally understand George Lucas's brilliant plot formula for Star Wars and find out all about Episode 7: The Hidden Circle.
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